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Connie's Story: Freedom from Abuse and Neglect · Get The Hell Out of Your Life with Ron Meyers

• 0:01
  It's time now to get the hell out of your life.
• 0:04
  A weekly broadcast with real people sharing real struggles and offering real hope.
• 0:10
  Today's show will encourage, inspire and empower you to face life's challenges with a bold confidence and renewed hope.
• 0:17
  Now let's join our host, ron Myers.
• 0:20
  The promoter.
• 0:22
  Ron Meyers: Hello, my friend, it is so good to be with you today.
• 0:25
  Ron Meyers: Have you had your conversations with Jesus?
• 0:28
  Ron Meyers: I know there have been some things on your mind a little bit of worry, a little bit of anxiety.
• 0:33
  Ron Meyers: Well, I'm telling you from experience a daily dose of Jesus, Conversations with coffee, or walk on the beach, driving in the car, just sharing your heart, being open, with the concerns on your heart.
• 0:49
  Ron Meyers: It is therapy, because Jesus is in the business of ministering to us.
• 0:56
  Ron Meyers: So we see this unbelievable love that he has given each of us and we need to walk in that love.
• 1:05
  Ron Meyers: And today's story, well, you're going to hear about Connie.
• 1:09
  Ron Meyers: Connie did not grow up in a very nice environment.
• 1:13
  Ron Meyers: She was tossed around from foster home to foster home and all kinds of abuse, things that you would ask.
• 1:20
  Ron Meyers: Well, if there is a loving God, why would God allow that?
• 1:24
  Ron Meyers: Well, God allows things because we have a choice.
• 1:31
  Ron Meyers: And most people that I've interviewed, hundreds and hundreds of people, when they got to the point in life where they could not go on anymore, they found Jesus.
• 1:42
  Ron Meyers: They fell in love with Jesus.
• 1:44
  Ron Meyers: And today they're doing things not because of earning points with Jesus.
• 1:49
  Ron Meyers: They're doing things because they're so in love with Jesus because he rescued them, Just like me.
• 1:59
  Ron Meyers: I'm on this show.
• 2:00
  Ron Meyers: I buy time because I need to tell people what Jesus did for me.
• 2:04
  Ron Meyers: It just may touch that one person out there that is asking God, are you real and can you help me?
• 2:10
  Ron Meyers: Well, Connie's story today is going to encourage you If you're going through some struggles and trials in life.
• 2:19
  Ron Meyers: Listen closely and then, in the final thought segment, I will unpack the love power of Jesus.
• 2:28
  Ron Meyers: But first, Connie, welcome to the studios.
• 2:31
  Ron Meyers: Connie, what's your story?
• 2:37
  Connie: Well, I came from a broken home where I didn't know my mother.
• 2:42
  Connie: My dad had taken me from her when I was one years old and he killed me, only to abuse me physically, emotionally and sexually.
• 2:55
  Connie: And, starting at the age of six years old and as time had passed, I remember wanting to be with my mom and and he would like look at me and tell me you want to meet your mom, you can meet her.
• 3:15
  Connie: But he was just doing a mocking thing.
• 3:18
  Connie: It's like if he, when he looked at me, he saw my mom and as I grew up, I just like when I met my mom, which I did in 2003, I could see why.
• 3:29
  Connie: It's like he despised me because I looked just like her and I used to.
• 3:33
  Connie: When people say, you look like your mom, I I really did not like hearing that comment.
• 3:39
  Connie: But anyways, I grew up, I became a ward of the state of Alabama and there I would go to, you know, different group homes.
• 3:49
  Connie: I was in a foster home where I was also sexually molested and abused and it's like one day we were going to school which we lived across the street at the foster home that I was in, and it was kindergarten to first grade and on that particular day my foster mom she was an elderly lady, but they had got our checks, you know, from the government to take care of us.
• 4:18
  Connie: And so she went to go, you know, get our checks cashed and do what she had to do pay bills, I guess.
• 4:25
  Connie: So all I wanted to do was the pain to stop.
• 4:29
  Connie: You know, I was really hurting and I didn't know how to reach out to anybody to talk to or anything of that nature.
• 4:39
  Connie: And so I ran over there to the house when it was gone, and I lit a match to her bed and I set the house on fire and then I ran back to the school.
• 4:52
  Connie: But then I'm thinking like what did I just do?
• 4:54
  Connie: What did I just do?
• 4:55
  Connie: Not realizing what I'd really done?
• 4:59
  Connie: I went back, was trying to go back, but it was a little later, you know.
• 5:04
  Connie: Time had passed by maybe about 30 minutes or so, and the house was engulfed in flames.
• 5:10
  Connie: So then next thing I know is that the fire department is there and this lady who was my foster mother, she was there, and it's just like I ran over there.
• 5:23
  Connie: But then I forgot about my pain, because then I seen her pain and it's just like I heard it because she heard it.
• 5:31
  Connie: But I was no longer caught up in my own pain and I even though I didn't recognize it then, but I know now it was a gift that God has given me toward others.
• 5:45
  Ron Meyers: And so I want to emphasize that.
• 5:47
  Ron Meyers: So you had pain, but then when you went over to see the house on fire that you had caught on fire, you saw her in pain and that made you forget your pain because you wanted to help her.
• 6:01
  Ron Meyers: Yes, sir.
• 6:03
  Connie: And that was something that I have often did throughout my life.
• 6:08
  Connie: They said people have told me which I didn't understand, but again, being a Christian today and knowing God as I do, I know that it was has been a gift that he has given me.
• 6:19
  Connie: He's given me a love for others and I thank him for that.
• 6:22
  Connie: He's given me a love for others and I thank him for that.
• 6:25
  Ron Meyers: So after the fire and you saw her hurting, did you stay with the foster lady, or how long did you stay with her?
• 6:34
  Connie: I did stay there for a little bit.
• 6:35
  Connie: We had moved in with her son and I know that the abuse continued and I was not feeling good.
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  Connie: She made me go to school.
• 6:44
  Connie: So I went to school that morning.
• 6:46
  Connie: I was sick, I was hurting because I got tired of the abuse.
• 6:50
  Connie: She herself didn't do the abuse, except for verbally, but she allowed her daughter to do the abuse.
• 6:56
  Connie: And I mean like, when I say abuse I mean like beat me with stinching cords and and and such things of that.
• 7:05
  Connie: But anyway, I had went to school that morning and I went to the principal's office and it's like I was hyperventilating and they gave me a little bag, paper bag, and was trying to calm me down and I told them to call my social worker and they did and I told her I said you come get me or I'm coming to you, but I'm not going back to that house.
• 7:27
  Connie: And that was the last that I have known anything about the foster home.
• 7:34
  Connie: They came and get me, they put me into the Salvation Army group home in Birmingham, alabama, which I stayed, and then they passed me off to another group home and I ended up when I was about 12 years old I guess I went into this one group home it was called 13th Place in Gaston, alabama, and there I had stayed there for a little bit and there was just one lady you know they were Christians and so I had stayed there for a couple of years and, of course, some of my behavior I didn't want to do anything, I was a stubborn little kid, didn't want to do anything.
• 8:24
  Connie: I was a stubborn little kid, didn't want to do anything, had no reason to live, tried to commit suicide so many times.
• 8:31
  Connie: But they never gave up on me.
• 8:36
  Connie: This one lady who I stay in contact with today, her name is Joella and she never, ever, let me give up on myself.
• 8:45
  Connie: Wow, and she taught me, she introduced to me gospel music with sandy patty, michael w smith, amy grant and, uh, a group called petra and so forth, and I liked it.
• 9:01
  Connie: Uh, there was one that this other lady forth and I liked it.
• 9:08
  Connie: Uh, there was one that this other lady that she used to come and get me, take me to go Burger King, do things together.
• 9:10
  Connie: It was really nice, it felt good, although I had trust issues, but it felt good.
• 9:17
  Connie: You know, sometimes you, when you've been hurt so much, you kind of, you know you put walls up to try to protect yourself from being hurt, but anyway.
• 9:27
  Connie: So I used to want that one lady, joella, to adopt me.
• 9:31
  Connie: She never did, but we, we were good friends, she was really good to me.
• 9:37
  Connie: And so years passed and went to uh, they told me that they was going to send me to the Gulfport Job Corps Center.
• 9:44
  Connie: Well, at first they told me I could pick anywhere I wanted to go and I said, well, how long does it have the beach?
• 9:53
  Connie: And so I was thinking Florida.
• 9:54
  Connie: Well, they ended up sending me to Gulfport Mississippi.
• 9:57
  Connie: So when I came to Gulfport Mississippi, I was at Job Corps, couldn't wait to get on the beach, although we had to wait two weeks Because we was in orientation and you had to wait two weeks before you get off.
• 10:09
  Connie: So when I went there I was Very disappointed because all I saw Was a bunch of dead fish on the beach.
• 10:15
  Connie: So, anyway, but I forgot about All the things that as time passed, what Joella was teaching me or whatever, about God.
• 10:29
  Connie: You know, I used to go to church with her, but I never had anyone there to like iron, sharpened iron, you know what I mean To be there to kind of guide me into the word.
• 10:41
  Connie: And no teaching, no teaching, discipleship no so, uh, I lost my way there, or my desire for god, and I just wanted to fill the void in my life.
• 10:56
  Connie: So I just would, um drink.
• 11:01
  Connie: You know, I wasn't an alcoholic or anything like that, but I just would drink, even though I didn't like drinking, I didn't like the taste of it.
• 11:13
  Ron Meyers: But it voided it temporarily yeah, it takes the pain away temporarily, doesn't it?
• 11:19
  Connie: temporarily.
• 11:19
  Connie: But but when you, when you become from underneath that, the pain is still there.
• 11:26
  Ron Meyers: So it really doesn't help.
• 11:28
  Ron Meyers: So what eventually happened in your life to take away the pain?
• 11:32
  Ron Meyers: If it did, do you still deal with the pain when?
• 11:35
  Connie: I'm at now.
• 11:36
  Connie: I went to church.
• 11:38
  Connie: Well, I met my mom in 2003.
• 11:41
  Connie: And in 2003, I had gotten a letter and I I'm just thinking this is from my mom, and my boyfriend at the time said, well, will you just open it already, because I was just amazed like the last name threw me off, because I knew her, as her last name was either Kelly or Ragsdale, and Jones was throwing me off but the Leoma, I knew that was her name and she was from Oklahoma.
• 12:08
  Connie: So, anyway, I, to make a long story short, I opened the letter, I accepted her into my life, although when I asked her a question, if my dad ever abused her, because then that would give me a reason then to feel better, as in to accept her into my life, a reason why she wasn't there, and so, but when she told me, no, I know, I wanted to hang up, but the thing is again like that was one of those things.
• 12:37
  Connie: I didn't know why then, but I know why now, because God was in control and he was guiding my steps.
• 12:43
  Connie: But I didn't hang up on her.
• 12:45
  Connie: I did accept her into my life and so she came.
• 12:48
  Connie: She had came where I was living, which was in Biloxi she came to visit.
• 12:53
  Connie: So she was sitting there saying, well, you know, you're going to come and stay where I'm at and I'm thinking these people are nuts, because I don't know them like that.
• 13:01
  Connie: You know what I'm saying.
• 13:03
  Connie: Like I'm just meeting you and you thinking I'm gonna come and move where you had a lot in oklahoma.
• 13:14
  Connie: Yeah, you, you, you kind of nutso, you know.
• 13:15
  Connie: But anyway, I kept feeling it, feeling this thing.
• 13:17
  Connie: After they came to visit about three times I say well, less than a year that I've known her I kept feeling this unction in my well, I didn't know at the time.
• 13:25
  Connie: That's my spirit, you know what I mean.
• 13:27
  Connie: I do know now, but I kept feeling this desire like I had to go and I'm like thinking I'm crazy.
• 13:35
  Ron Meyers: So you went to Oklahoma.
• 13:37
  Connie: I did.
• 13:37
  Connie: I stayed there for a little less than a year.
• 13:42
  Ron Meyers: You gave it a shot, huh.
• 13:44
  Connie: I gave it a year, you gave it a shot.
• 13:45
  Connie: Huh, I gave it a shot, but that is where God really ministers to me, because it's like, I'm like, literally, not like originally here from Gulfport.
• 13:56
  Connie: I was born in Birmingham but I have been here for the most part of my adult.
• 14:00
  Connie: You know young, older teenager years into adulthood.
• 14:04
  Connie: You know young, older teenager years into adulthood.
• 14:05
  Connie: And when I sit up there and went there it was like God's timing was bam, bam, bam.
• 14:12
  Connie: It was only God could have orchestrated that he was setting me up.
• 14:17
  Ron Meyers: What did he set
• 14:18
  Connie: When I went up there, it was like I didn't go to church.
• 14:21
  Connie: Church wasn't my thing.
• 14:22
  Connie: So I sit up there and went to church because, out of respect for my mother, that's what she did.
• 14:29
  Connie: So I went, and then on the bulletin there is a thing where it talks about a pastor's coming there for a revival.
• 14:39
  Connie: But get this, the pastor that's coming there for a revival from guppard, mississippi oh, you're kidding me and I'm thinking like this guy must have a sense of humor, so, and it was ray clute, and so then it's just like, and during this time I was really trying to end my life and and I know that it should have been ended because I took like so many pills, but anyway, when they came to church they ministered to me and it really touched me and I had been trying to take my life before they came and it's just like they touched me.
• 15:23
  Connie: So I went and I got this one gift and I knew that it was God that directed me on this, because what I had picked out for them, because they touched me, so I wanted to show my appreciation to them.
• 15:36
  Connie: So the thing that I originally had picked out, I took back and I got this other thing.
• 15:43
  Connie: Well, I gave it to them that one night at church.
• 15:47
  Connie: Then the next night I did not go because I was literally trying to take my life and almost succeeded.
• 15:55
  Connie: When my mom and my daughter had came home, I was in the bed, my skin was cool to touch, my eyes, was rolled in the back of my head and I had no color to me.
• 16:11
  Connie: And just but God all of a sudden made that stuff, reject my system, and I just regurgitated and I was weak.
• 16:24
  Connie: But then my mom told me that next day said, you know, that pastor said that that gift that you gave him, that nobody had known but god, that that was something that he had always wanted.
• 16:36
  Connie: And I was thinking like, wow, you know god could use me to bring happiness to others, and so that touched me, that I can be used.
• 16:50
  Connie: You know, like I have a purpose.
• 16:51
  Connie: And then she sung this song like, uh, god, I mean, uh, I still have a future.
• 16:57
  Connie: And I was listening, but god was ministering to this song and to the fact that he could use me in the way that he did, because I wouldn't have known that was something that he'd always wanted and it did so.
• 17:11
  Connie: In a way, I ended up giving my life to christ and even though I've been touching, go through a lot, been through a lot of church hurts and things of that nature, not wanting to go back to church, but you know, I know it was God who didn't do me wrong, it was people.
• 17:29
  Connie: It was people, and I think people need to understand that it is not God that fails them.
• 17:34
  Connie: God is one that never fails.
• 17:36
  Connie: He is always on time, every time, and I know that when he came into my life, it's like he just opened up my mind, like a can opener, and just poured his love inside of me.
• 17:52
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 17:53
  Connie: And it's just like.
• 17:55
  Ron Meyers: I'm so sorry to hear all that stuff you had to go through.
• 17:57
  Ron Meyers: A little girl should never have to grow up with that, but your story can minister to someone out there that is going through the same thing and you've got the microphone.
• 18:08
  Ron Meyers: So I would love for you, as you close this out, will you pray for people that may be going through what you're doing and just whatever the Lord lays on your heart, Because somebody is out there hurting but you can reach them with that love and compassion you have Well.
• 18:26
  Connie: Father, I just come to you and I thank you for your unconditional love.
• 18:30
  Connie: And, lord, I just ask you that you see all those who are going through lord god and who are hurting, and lord god, you know the ins and outs about each and every one and you care about them all, but I just thank you for that, your love to penetrate their inner beings.
• 18:45
  Connie: Lord Lord, father God, and I just want you all to know that if you've gone through things of sexual molestation or physically or emotionally abused, you are not what man says you are.
• 18:55
  Connie: You are who God says you are and he treasures you and he loves you and he desires to have a relationship with you.
• 19:02
  Connie: And I pray that you do not be deceived by the lies of the enemy, for he will try to come and steal your joy that God is so friendly giving you and I just want to pray a blessing upon you, that God will bless you and touch you and that you will feel his ultimate love surrounding you.
• 19:23
  Connie: And I want you to know that you can depend on him and you can trust him.
• 19:28
  Connie: He's the only one that will never let you down People will but he will never disappoint you and I thank you, jesus, for your love for them, and that you will put people in their path as they're needed.
• 19:48
  Ron Meyers: What an awesome story.
• 19:50
  Ron Meyers: When I return, let's unpack what we just heard.
• 19:55
  You're listening to Get the Hell Out of your Life with your host, ron Myers.
• 20:00
  Real stories, real struggles and real hope.
• 20:06
  Speaker 5: Here's a refreshing word from Ephesians 5, 1 and 2.
• 20:09
  Speaker 5: Therefore, be imitators of God as dear children, and walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given himself for us.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Some of us are building highways, not with our hands, but with our hearts.
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: We're on a journey that doesn't have an end.
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: It's a rough road, but we know that someday it will be worth every rugged mile.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: Why don't you join us?
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: We're the Christians.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Now.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: I know you've heard a lot of weird things about us most of it not true.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: We don't really care.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: We just know that we're going to live forever and we can have an abundant life along the way.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: Jesus is our guide on this journey called life, and he said that he came to give us life that goes on forever and an abundant life.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: Hey, it's a toll-free highway.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: Jesus already paved the way.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: All we have to do is come on board.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: You don't have to be religious, you don't have to be perfect.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: You just have to accept the fact that Jesus already bridged the way to heaven.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: Then you have to put him behind the wheel, but when you finally let go and let Jesus take over, it's amazing how you find the journey a lot more peaceful, because life without Jesus is kind of like going four-wheeling on a skateboard.
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: Take some time to learn about Jesus.
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: You'll find out how he can build an eternal highway in your heart.
• 21:21
  Connie: You're tired of how you're living.
• 21:23
  Connie: We'll change it.
• 21:24
  Connie: You don't?
• 21:30
  like where you're headed.
• 21:31
  Rearrange it.
• 21:31
  You're sick of being let down.
• 21:33
  And you want to turn your life around.
• 21:35
  If you want to start living right, get the hell out of your life.
• 21:44
  Ron Meyers: Get the hell out of your life.
• 21:45
  Ron Meyers: Wow, connie's story.
• 21:47
  Ron Meyers: How could all the abuse, all the nonsense that she was told as a child, how could a person like that one day fall in love with Jesus?
• 22:01
  Ron Meyers: I think where she started finding that God was in her life, that God's love was there, when she said she caught the foster mom's home on fire and she went back to the house and saw it engulfed in flames.
• 22:17
  Ron Meyers: But then she had compassion for the foster mother and her pain went away.
• 22:25
  Ron Meyers: And I've often said they have one thing in common, my guess they felt the power of God when they were actually ministering or talking to somebody else that needed some compassion or love and friends.
• 22:39
  Ron Meyers: That's with all of us.
• 22:40
  Ron Meyers: There is nobody that's walking the face of this earth that can tell you they just had a perfect life and they're having everything perfect now.
• 22:50
  Ron Meyers: No, there is no such thing.
• 22:52
  Ron Meyers: The most beautiful thing that God has given each of us is the free gift of his son, jesus.
• 23:00
  Ron Meyers: When we open up our heart and we let Jesus come in, then his love just begins to fill us up.
• 23:08
  Ron Meyers: It changes our direction, it changes our desires and this is the one thing about love that I noticed this with Connie when the full love of God takes over your life, you begin doing the things that you want to do to please God and you'll find that the temptations and the sins and all the stuff that has held you back, they begin to diminish, because you're not walking in a world of rules.
• 23:40
  Ron Meyers: For God to love you, you've accepted the fact that he unconditionally loves you.
• 23:48
  Ron Meyers: Friends, the most important foundation that each of us can have is to understand the foundation of God's love in your life.
• 23:56
  Ron Meyers: Because until you understand how much you are loved, how much you have been forgiven and how much freedom you have when you walk by the spirit of grace through Jesus, until you really understand that life is tough.
• 24:13
  Ron Meyers: When I found out how much I am truly loved and that love in me just exploded, that love in me just exploded.
• 24:29
  Ron Meyers: Then I wanted to do things for other people.
• 24:30
  Ron Meyers: I wanted to do them because I was motivated by the presence of Jesus in my life.
• 24:34
  Ron Meyers: It wasn't rule keeping anymore, it wasn't a checklist of things.
• 24:39
  Ron Meyers: I have to do so with Connie's beautiful story today of how she found the freedom in Christ.
• 24:49
  Ron Meyers: She is free.
• 24:51
  Ron Meyers: She is a woman that will tell everybody about Jesus and guess who she talks to the most, the people that have been abused, that have been told they're no good.
• 25:04
  Ron Meyers: They have no self-image, but they meet Connie and Connie is relatable to them, and then they begin having hope.
• 25:16
  Ron Meyers: Friends, your story is just as important.
• 25:20
  Ron Meyers: You want to minister to people.
• 25:22
  Ron Meyers: Do you want people to experience Jesus?
• 25:25
  Ron Meyers: Well, maybe you need to quit inviting them to church and quit throwing a Bible in their face.
• 25:31
  Ron Meyers: Why don't you just tell them what you have experienced with Jesus?
• 25:37
  Ron Meyers: Why don't you tell them what you have learned from Jesus?
• 25:42
  Ron Meyers: Why not tell them who Jesus is to you?
• 25:47
  Ron Meyers: Friends, until people want the hope and the love and the compassion and the forgiveness, until they really want that more than the pain in their life, you can invite them to all the church services in the world.
• 26:05
  Ron Meyers: You can invite them to all the church services in the world.
• 26:09
  Ron Meyers: It won't do any good, but tell them what Jesus did for you and what he will do for them.
• 26:18
  Speaker 5: Ron, we'll be back in a moment to wrap up today's conversation.
• 26:22
  Speaker 5: We want to encourage you today with God's promise to you.
• 26:25
  Speaker 5: It comes from the book of Jeremiah, chapter 29, verse 11.
• 26:30
  Speaker 5: For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord.
• 26:34
  Speaker 5: Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.
• 26:37
  Speaker 5: Plans to give you hope and a future.
• 26:40
  Speaker 5: That's God's promise to you when you choose to commit your plans and future to Him.
• 26:49
  Speaker 5: Now back to Ron.
• 27:23
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• 27:39
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• 27:42
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• 27:52
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