Latest / SHULCHAN ARUCH YOMI: Own the Halacha in 25 minutes a day! / Yoreh De’ah 235:2-236:2. Vows: Between Spouses, When Divorce Is Required; SHAVUOS: Expressive or In Vain
Transcript
- 0:01OK, we're going to be continuing with Raesh Al Ahmed.
- 0:04Hey Helhos Nadarian, we're going to be going to see if Dalit in
- 0:08one moment. I just want to make a quick just
- 0:13to explain if I wasn't clear, we're not going to read it
- 0:16inside, but in see if bet the whole case is he makes a vow not
- 0:21in the beginning of see if, but he makes a vow not to get any
- 0:24Hanaa from, but she's not allowed to get any Hana from
- 0:31him. And that's referring to
- 0:33financial Hana. It does not refer to Tashmish
- 0:36because then that would never be ha.
- 0:39So even though he says that on Tashmish, it's not called, but
- 0:42it is called on the financial matters.
- 0:44So we discussed, you know how that plays out.
- 0:49As long as if there's room for it to be called, it's called.
- 0:53Otherwise, it's not That was back then.
- 0:57And yeah, just wanted to explain when we mentioned that it might
- 1:02be called if he says to her and don't.
- 1:07And I'm going to let you keep your own earnings.
- 1:09So this way you don't have to rely on me.
- 1:12So that the Devarian gadolium over there are the basic
- 1:15necessities and the Devarian katanium are small luxuries.
- 1:19And then again, it depends what she and he were accustomed to
- 1:23when they got married. But now once she goes back to
- 1:26her, but behaving like this, speaking like this makes her go
- 1:30back to her home. And then now he's financially
- 1:32obligated to to pay for everything.
- 1:35But that's OK. So that was was it whether it
- 1:39was hall or not, that was the the distinction.
- 1:41And then now he has to pay for everything sign.
- 1:44So he might have to do it through somebody else.
- 1:46OK, now, just and then in C Eve, so that was in Saint Gilmel and
- 1:52C EV Gilmel also that if you make again, if you make a nether
- 1:58where it makes her living conditions unacceptable, not
- 2:02viable, she's just it's not going to work for her.
- 2:05It's not possible. So then that's when it's not
- 2:08going to. That's when he is obligated to
- 2:12give if it's called right. So then but if he makes it where
- 2:16it's she can't live like that. So that's when he's forced to
- 2:19give a get and a tuba. Now normally we give them, let's
- 2:24say a week, a month or a regular, whatever it is, you
- 2:27know, for each and whatever the item is, whatever's appropriate.
- 2:30But whenever he so that's whenever he or she bakes the
- 2:35nether, just to clarify. But if she makes the nether and
- 2:39then he says like Amin or he hears it and he doesn't do
- 2:43Hafara, that's like upholding it.
- 2:46She sees that he he knows about it.
- 2:49So normally we hope they get together, you know, we assume or
- 2:54we hope that he just did it out of the spur of the moment of
- 2:57anger and hopefully he'll change his mind and now they'll live
- 3:01happily ever after. But if he stamps the approval to
- 3:05her Neder, so that is quite damaging to her emotionally.
- 3:10And then she thinks he's not just angry, but Humamish hates
- 3:14me. And then again, we're not saying
- 3:16that he has to give her a get right away.
- 3:19If we we probably we might want to help them get together, but
- 3:24we say if she has the right to demand it immediately.
- 3:28And then if she demands it right away, then we make him give her
- 3:31a get immediately. But it's more coming from her
- 3:34than from him. But yes, the Allaha is it's
- 3:38that's what's called Miad. Also, we mentioned the base
- 3:41Alvel and the base Mishta if it wasn't clear, because a woman
- 3:44can't live without going to a funeral.
- 3:47And what's so bad? Because Kumar also says, I mean,
- 3:50that's part of life. But also, if no one, if she
- 3:53never goes to anyone's funeral because he austered it to her,
- 3:57that's not also not tenable for her to live that way because
- 3:59then when she dies, she's going to be afraid.
- 4:03She's afraid now that when she dies, no one's going to come to
- 4:06her funeral because she never went to anybody else's, right?
- 4:10It's a lesson in life that we have to behave to others how we
- 4:14want them to behave to us. And so it obviously it's
- 4:18important to go to Asimka and Abeis Avil and then people will
- 4:23hopefully reciprocate. And then also not letting her go
- 4:28to Abaisa Mishta is Gomara says is Noel de della to closes the
- 4:32door from her having Simcha in life or a release of her
- 4:36suffering in life. And we no one has the right to
- 4:40cut that off from from anybody. OK, so that so that that leads
- 4:45to Dalid Nadra neither medevarium shibenola bena.
- 4:50She makes another for that are things are related between the
- 4:53two of them. OSHA inoi nefesh or anything to
- 4:57do with Inui nephesh. And then so he has the right,
- 5:01the jurisdiction to do hafarah. So this is a continuation from
- 5:05Gimel. So then similar topic, right,
- 5:07The Hefarah law. And then he, he does hafarah,
- 5:13but on a conditional hafarah. In other words, well, we're
- 5:17going to see it's not really a hafarah.
- 5:19So, but he tells her, OK, fine, fine.
- 5:21I'm I'm annulling it. Hoofar hoofar hoofarah almanat,
- 5:27she told Marleploni Davarshal Cologne.
- 5:29You go and you insult somebody or you say something that's
- 5:33going to embarrass you, whatever the case might be.
- 5:38Or he demands from her on the condition that she right after
- 5:42they have relations, she puts herself in an inch in some
- 5:45interesting position, right? Not normal in order Kadesh,
- 5:50because supposedly if you put yourself in that position, it
- 5:55prevents them from her from becoming pregnant.
- 6:00So again, that's not tenable for her.
- 6:02OSHA Tahim Emilia Sarah khadi mine.
- 6:05Or if she fills up, that's on the condition that she goes
- 6:10fills up 10 pitchers of water of a Tishbachemla Ashpa and pour it
- 6:14inside a garbage. In other words, you make her do
- 6:17something that makes her look like she's mentally retarded or
- 6:21not quite not quite there. So that's something we he Ena
- 6:24Rosales so ehad me Elova Duvarin and she is not interested in
- 6:28doing one of these things. Vinit Khayyama Neder and so she
- 6:32doesn't do it. And then the Neder is Khal.
- 6:35So then right, he's upholding the Neder by not doing Hafara.
- 6:39So then whether it's you know, whether it's actively or not
- 6:43actively, right, the fact that he heard and didn't do hafara
- 6:46and she sees that or knows that, then Yodzi retain ketuba.
- 6:51And I'm going to add the words Miyad because by not the the
- 6:56words Miyad, you'll see if that's the favorite.
- 7:00I involve your bet. But the is here because this is
- 7:04a case of something he has jurisdiction to do Hafarah and
- 7:08he doesn't do Hafarah. So then she goes, oh, he hates
- 7:11me. Just just simply doesn't.
- 7:14Do. Hafarah.
- 7:15We don't say that. Yeah, we do anytime.
- 7:19Anytime. He doesn't do Hafarah then.
- 7:26Yeah, interesting. And he does it any time or one
- 7:30of these things that are all in Gimel and Dalid.
- 7:39OK, good question. We'll leave that as a question
- 7:41mark. These are all the examples that
- 7:43are given in the Gomara pretty much and Mishnah mainly Gomara.
- 7:47And that's yeah, Anyway, here's the bridge between.
- 7:51You're one of the bridges between your idea and Evan Ezer.
- 7:54So when we maybe when we get that, we'll we'll get that
- 7:57sorted out. OK.
- 8:01Yeah. Also one of the things that's
- 8:03untenable that you can't live by if this was in Gimel, not being
- 8:07able to work because work gives that makes a person crazy.
- 8:12Sometimes it makes them bored and a person not working, not
- 8:16working. Yeah, in, in, in, in, in the
- 8:19Tara and in khamesh. Working is actually a mitzvah.
- 8:21It's actually a good thing. It's codified all over the place
- 8:24in the Shalkanara Nishnabura. But whatever, let's go on to
- 8:29Hey, asura asura. She makes a Nader not to borrow
- 8:38dishes or items from her neighbors Kadeshalotishal mehem,
- 8:42so that she that's why she won't be able to.
- 8:47She won't bar them Oceanada sholara begadim naim Libina or
- 8:52Libina. She won't make any clothing,
- 8:55perhaps fixing clothing for her son.
- 8:59So then Eno Yahoo lafaire he so then he has has no right on this
- 9:06one to do Hafara because it's an issue of it's not an issue of
- 9:10Eno E nefesh. It's not an issue of Benola
- 9:13Bena. So it's again, secondarily, it
- 9:17might affect her, but it's not in that category.
- 9:20It's not close enough to to affect him.
- 9:22So then about sur Alisha Misha, she cannot borrow from her
- 9:31friends belaric but begadium and to weave or to sow Hilcock Tate
- 9:36say beloke tuba shamacio shamacia to shame rah Mishkunov.
- 9:43So on this, this is more than more of a of an Ezra issue.
- 9:46But here he's allowed to divorce her without even paying the
- 9:50katuba rights because she is giving him a bad name.
- 9:54He's ruining his reputation. He's making him like a whatever
- 10:00pariah or someone that people don't want to be around and
- 10:03she's doing that to him. So when the lady does that, you
- 10:05don't have to pay her Katuba. What if she's a Heather and
- 10:08they're on her words? You don't want to borrow them
- 10:10tissues or clothes because you don't want two of them.
- 10:13So I'm. Just being a little bit fun.
- 10:15Yeah, OK. That would be a good thing.
- 10:18All right. Val Val sha almar al ishta oser
- 10:22ani alaka shaloh Taylor la bait avika OSHA almar Allah kunam
- 10:26alayik bait avika anoklum. So this is really more of a
- 10:31review from what we learned before.
- 10:33If a man just calls out to his wife and says that I am making
- 10:38it us or for you to go to your father's house, that's it.
- 10:43I'm asking you, you're never allowed to go to your father's
- 10:44house or he says, all right, He says I'm making a corban for
- 10:52you. You're not allowed to a lesson
- 10:55of another that you can't go to your father's house ain't no
- 10:58clue. So this is not a this is not a
- 11:00call for two reasons. First of all, the wording is an
- 11:04expression of a it's an action and it had in order for it to be
- 11:12called as another has to be on the hefez, so it can't be
- 11:16another the way it was worded. Secondly, it's he has no rights
- 11:21to asser on anybody else. I mean that's the main real
- 11:24reason over here. The first primary reason
- 11:26probably is it can't even be considered a shavua because he
- 11:30has no rights to make her do anyway.
- 11:35He has no rights over her fine only on his own possessions.
- 11:38He doesn't own his wife right? Men do not own their wives and
- 11:42OK vice versa as well. Now we are so that concludes the
- 11:46Hilchos nadarium. But same almost the same topic.
- 11:51We are now continuing or or beginning Hilchos chavous all
- 11:56right, oats all right. So again, the main difference a
- 12:01Ned there is when a person makes a an an oath bait and it's
- 12:08attached to his own body or himself or any Heifetz, then it
- 12:13could be hull. But if it's if it has to be on a
- 12:17on something physical, on a physical object, a can't be on a
- 12:21doing on an action word. So but a chivua can be on just
- 12:26doing something. OK, I'll just start real big kit
- 12:30Sir. Interesting because Shavuas.
- 12:33So I'm not sure if I'm going to count it correctly, but a brief,
- 12:38brief intro from the Araka. Shokhan says.
- 12:42He says there are 8 Shavuot that are mean.
- 12:46Hatara, open up the Hamish, you'll see eight of them.
- 12:49There's Shavuot, A Shomring. And that's right with the
- 12:53watching one person to another protect guarding something.
- 12:58Shivua Shimoda bemixat of a person partially right admits to
- 13:04something. So then in Bayesian they'll make
- 13:05him swear on the other half or the other part Shivua Lahakhi
- 13:09Sheta 8 he makes the Shivua 2GO against it, testify against it
- 13:17testimony. So this is in Hoshin Mishpat
- 13:21fine, Shivuat Sota. That's that's another Shiva that
- 13:25a sota makes right? That's OK, That's over there.
- 13:29And Evan Azar Shivaat B toy. So this is a Shiva of
- 13:33expression. So that's what we're doing right
- 13:36now. That's what we're about to learn
- 13:38and Shiva Chav are about to learn Shiva a dude on the Shiva
- 13:43of a testimony itself. We'll see what that is Shiva A
- 13:46Picadon also about Shiva when a person was watching something.
- 13:52And so these are going to be touched upon over here.
- 13:56She points out Shiva, it's a Vitoi and has the the Natara.
- 14:01When it talks about it, it says Nefesh kitishba when I because
- 14:06it's it's a kid. Shiva Vitoi is always optional
- 14:10whenever you're never forced to make a Shiva Vitoi.
- 14:13It's Nefesh Kitishba. Whenever a soul feels it's in
- 14:17the mood to make a Shiva. So we're going to see because
- 14:21it's we're going to see, we're going to about to read what it
- 14:23is exactly. It's an expression of doing
- 14:26something. You will do something.
- 14:27You, you didn't do something. We'll get to that in a moment.
- 14:30Shivu at Shah. We're going to get to that.
- 14:35You know, I think we'll just start to see it inside.
- 14:38Fine, let's, let's just let's just read inside.
- 14:43Alef nefesh kitisha levate Biswatayan, a person.
- 14:47It's an expression he he chooses to make to express something, to
- 14:51make a Shibuya. That something is Hainu
- 14:54Shanishba. We'll see what that means.
- 14:56He makes an oath now it could be on the past or future Behnard
- 15:00Avarshavar, right? Whether it happened already
- 15:03could go Shanishba Shahal Veloachal.
- 15:06He makes a Shibuya that I ate yesterday eggs for breakfast and
- 15:09he did it and and he lied. So that's well, we'll see what
- 15:14happens if you like, but that's the Shibuya.
- 15:17Oh, Shalu akhal VE Akhal or he makes a Shiva and that I didn't
- 15:24eat eggs yesterday and and he did.
- 15:27So then he violated the Shalu Bain aldevarshala ABBA in the
- 15:31future type of a wording. He going, he says he's going to
- 15:37eat eggs tomorrow, let's say, and, or and but then he doesn't
- 15:41Oh, Shalu akel VE akel or he says, I'm not going to eat.
- 15:44And then he does eat the thing called and then so to any
- 15:48similar example of even if it's just like really not really
- 15:56important, not really, you're not saying anything good or bad,
- 15:59not to do a mitzvah, not to hurt someone.
- 16:01It's just simple eating that's could still be a schwat be to
- 16:05it. Kagon Shizarakti, Leon
- 16:07Velozarakti. I threw a stolen into the ocean
- 16:10or a coin, whatever, and I didn't.
- 16:12He said I did. He made a shuvo that I did, but
- 16:15he didn't. Oh, Azerak Velozarak.
- 16:17He says I'm going to throw it and he doesn't throw it.
- 16:20Valfilo Bitavar, she ain't bomamish again by a nether we
- 16:25learned it has to be a Dover. She is bomamish.
- 16:27Hafitz visits on. But when it comes to a shvua in
- 16:30particular, she would be toy. For example.
- 16:32It does not have to be any dovar Mamish keep going it.
- 16:37It could be a pure action without any item.
- 16:40He's about to say keep going. She yes Shanti Valley Ashanti.
- 16:44I slept and I didn't sleep. Oh, she Ishan below Ishan or I
- 16:48slept or I will sleep and I didn't and and he doesn't sleep
- 16:51just points out over there the shock.
- 16:53It must be that you made a Shiva that not to sleep for only one
- 16:57or two nights, because beyond that it's impossible.
- 16:59Anything that's impossible is it would make it a Shiva chav and
- 17:05not a Shiva be doing fine. So let's keep going.
- 17:08Keep going. Shiva aya de pain bit of a
- 17:13Loishan. I feel a bit of our Sheno Yahoo
- 17:15la Soto. Even if it's something that you
- 17:19can't do Ella Ayude, akheren, you need someone else to help
- 17:22you. If it's impossible, then that's
- 17:24another story. Has to be possible.
- 17:26But it it be it could be that you need help.
- 17:29Could or the shivu was dependent on somebody else.
- 17:33Kagone Shinatatati leploni. I gave XI gave Mr. Mr. XA $100
- 17:41Shinatati leploni. Oh, Shalona tati or I didn't
- 17:45give him and and and then so that's a Shiva that you can, you
- 17:50can violate oh shete leploni or shaloh attain leploni.
- 17:54Or if you say I again the future tense, I will give him or I
- 17:56won't give him whatever 1 you say is khal and that's all Shiva
- 18:00Bhitui now feeling nisba Allah Karim can go on Shi zarak plonid
- 18:05swirla yam or shaloh zarak. Or if somebody who makes a sure
- 18:11that somebody threw or someone didn't throw and then the
- 18:14opposite is true or happens. So all these are cases of Shiva.
- 18:20They call Elu Shivaat B to Hein the EM shiker B Shiva to if you
- 18:25lie or violate it, then you're high of a Corbin.
- 18:29So yeah, I think, OK, so let's read bet now, yeh Devarian.
- 18:39Now generally, if I have it correct, the shuwat, the main
- 18:44difference between shuwat B toe and shuwat shav, we're going to
- 18:46get to is if there's a Corbin, there's a Corbin for a shuwat B
- 18:49toe and for shav. Let's double check as we go on.
- 18:54But I think you get malchus, but you don't get a Corbin.
- 19:01OK, right. They're both dear eyes.
- 19:04But now Geist Divarium, what is this going on?
- 19:09Yeah, it is the room Shafila Shika Vishwato in Ohio Korba.
- 19:13Now you could be high of now sometimes you could be high of
- 19:17the arisa like I just said, but you're not high of a korba Kigon
- 19:21such as Shanish Balakayam have mitzvah volukian.
- 19:25If you make a shivua that you're going to you're going to uphold
- 19:27and do the mitzvah and then you don't oshanish Bala harala ploni
- 19:33kigong nakota la Carlo or you make a shivua to do something,
- 19:37to do somebody to, to hit them, to curse them.
- 19:42These are all things that are mepharisch and natara that's
- 19:44user to do so avaal haga IM nish Bala hakod atma.
- 19:51But if you make a Shiva to hit yourself alphabisha in or Shai
- 19:56kayala Shiva. So even no, it's an Issa de
- 19:59raisa to hurt yourself. But that is not mepharisch and
- 20:03natara. So then the Shiva.
- 20:06So then the Shiva is Kal. OK, let's keep reading.
- 20:12So we said these things. You're it's aser if you it's
- 20:18it's aser to to do these Shihuas, but you're not high of
- 20:21a Korba again, venish bashiasa calvera davaroploni or you make
- 20:27a Shihua that your friend is going to do something.
- 20:29You go and Shizrat Cloney swirl a yam that someone else is going
- 20:32to throw it into the yam or Shiloh Yizrat OK, or that he's
- 20:38not going to throw it into the Yum.
- 20:40And then you get one second. No korban aval avera eka
- 20:51bacolovar she she shakurbi shiwato.
- 20:56It's still in Issa da Raisa. As the shock points out, they're
- 20:59still malchus because this is a Shiva at this point, right?
- 21:09Because you're going to, you're saying a shivua against a
- 21:12mitzvah or an avera and natara. So it could be a shrewat shava.
- 21:17I believe that's all right. OK, the gum aim loli shava al
- 21:24carvero shiasse shumdevar Chino bresciuto shiasenu.
- 21:29And you also can't make a shavua on for someone else to do
- 21:34something because you don't you, you don't own that person.
- 21:37You can't control that person. You don't own them.
- 21:40And so therefore that you have no right.
- 21:44I'll call Panim one second Sheno berschuto shiaseno.
- 21:48I'll call Panim the EN cuvero mujui of la Soto.
- 21:51And just because you made such a chevua #1, you have no right to
- 21:56number 2. The person we're talking about
- 21:58doesn't have to listen. He's not much.
- 22:01We have to listen to you at all, Ella in Kenya, Kabel shiwato
- 22:05dainushi Omar Amin. Unless the person listening says
- 22:08Amin, because then by saying Amin, that's as if the Imama
- 22:11said it themselves with their own words.
- 22:14Oh, the varsh in you know Amin or you say another, you say
- 22:18something like the word Amin. You say the word yes, oh mehuya
- 22:23vani Shiva zu. Or you say I'm obligated myself
- 22:27in this Shiva just like you said, it's OK about the Alai
- 22:29Shiva zu. I accept this Shiva on myself.
- 22:32OK, I'm called Coyote. It's called Coyote Baze.
- 22:36Any similar wording, the alpha piece shall look Kiblu otama
- 22:39harima shivua now. Now, if they don't accept it
- 22:43upon themselves in Kymudvara pareilo mashubahim.
- 22:47But if you keep these, if you keep what your person said with
- 22:52his shivua, then it's considered and depending what it is, but it
- 22:55is considered praiseworthy and a good thing to do.
- 23:00And this way you prevent your friend from saying a Shivwat
- 23:05Shah. OK, now you save him from that
- 23:09Shivwat Shah. Hug up Nicole Shah, King Shanish
- 23:13Baat, most certainly the person who makes the Shivwa himself.
- 23:16Sorry Akayim Shivwato EM Afshar. He has to keep his own Shivwa
- 23:21that he made if it's something that he's able to do himself.
- 23:25Even though it started out the whole Shivwa was a Shivwat Shah,
- 23:30once you said it and it comes out of your words, you still
- 23:32have to. You still have to be a
- 23:36mackayeman. If you can, you're going
- 23:37Shanisha Isha Paloni like he made us a Shiva to marry this,
- 23:43this this young lady, the Shema lotitrat Savika Shiva chav.
- 23:48So she might not want to and it'll turn out to be a Shiva
- 23:51chav. Nico Malcolm Kashihiro said
- 23:53sorry for Kayim Shiva. So so it depends.
- 23:56So he should try and be a makayim but he her it's up to
- 23:58her. But if she wants to so then if
- 24:03she wants to marry him so then she should then he right Then he
- 24:08has to keep a Shiva of ayesh omrin the bikiye govna lo migre
- 24:13Shiva chav. Some say this case is not a
- 24:16Shiva chav, rock Shiva vitoi. Some say this case is considered
- 24:20a Shiva vitoi. The hanishpa litaine dabra la
- 24:23caveiro. When a person gives over to
- 24:25someone else who ain't a road to la cavalo, and he does, he makes
- 24:29a Shiva to give to somebody something and the other person
- 24:33doesn't want to accept it. So then he's patur MI chivuoto.
- 24:39So this case is not a some say this case is not a shwachov
- 24:43because it's totally questionable if the other person
- 24:49is going to want to do it or not.
- 24:52OK, Patur mishwatov, but what didn't him Eno him Eno wrote so
- 24:58too he like we said by the marriage case, he said it, but
- 25:01who says she's willing to do it? So since the other the condition
- 25:06or what's following the second, you know, the other half of the
- 25:09Shiva is so questionable how it's going to turn out and
- 25:12that's not called a Shiva shop. Well hey, no have Iraq, Shiva
- 25:16and the most it could be the Shiva.