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TMG: DISSH's 'Controversial' New Parental Policy · Outspoken the Podcast

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Hello and welcome to the mums group you actually want
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: to be a part of.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I'm Kate Torber and I'm joined by my sisters and
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: journalists Amy and Sophie.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Now last night I had a dinner party and my
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: brother-in-law and his partner were there and it just took
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: me back because they're a couple of weeks out from
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: having their baby and they were just so excited and
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: I was just bouncing off the energy.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: It makes you realise how far you've come within that year.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: When they start asking you questions and you almost can't
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: remember what you did, they're like, oh, so are there
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: any tips like about feeding? I mean, I think our
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: number one tip was our formula machine, wasn't it? That
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: was our trusty friend in the middle of the night.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Get the Tommy Tippy formula machine. That was my big advice.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: I loved it though, because your brother-in-law was telling us
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: how he and his partner had gone to one of
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: the birthing classes and someone ended up fainting just when
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: they were discussing blood.
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: And at this particular hospital, there was no doctor there,
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: so they had to get an ambulance to take them
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: to another hospital.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: What a nightmare, because that was my husband's biggest fear,
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: that he would faint during my C-section. I mean, because
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: it was a seminar on C-sections. I mean, that poor woman,
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: she probably doesn't have much faith in her husband now,
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: because she's like, he fainted at just hearing about it.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: How's he going to be when he's actually there?
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: It actually took me back to Abby Holmes' interview on
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: The Kickpot when she was talking about how her husband
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: was so ill that that he managed to push through
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: until the child was born and then had to be
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: taken off.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: He just collapsed, didn't he?
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and he was unwell for so long. I think
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: the biggest revelation of the night was when my brother-in-law
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: told me that now included in the presentation on C-sections
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: is that The male partner must keep their jocks on
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: when they go into the operating theatre when their partner's
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: about to give birth. Now, your husband in particular will
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: find that very vindicating because for anyone who's listened to
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: your birth story on our other podcast, Outspoken, he thought
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: he had to take his undies off.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Look, to be fair, it.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: Was actually quite confusing because for those who haven't had
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: a C-section, when you arrive, you get handed the scrubs
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: and they handed me the sort of nighty.
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: Thing and him the green doctor-looking scrubs.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: And they said to, well, they directed at me and said,
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: make sure you take your underpants off.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: And so when they left, Brandon's like, hold on a second,
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: I'm confused.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Am I supposed to take my underpants off too? See,
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: I was a little bit confused too because.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: I'm like, why do I need my undies off when
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: you're cutting the baby out of my stomach?
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Because of the catheter. Yes, I know. I remember that.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: How many men are free-balling it in the operating theatre then?
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: That's what disturbs me, the fact that they've actually had
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: to note this down on the info packet. Well, I'm
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: actually not surprised that they did because when we were
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: in the waiting bay to go in, we had another
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: couple across from us and they were also handed the scrubs.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: And I heard this woman's husband also say, am.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: I supposed to take my jobs off? So it must
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: just be a question. Do you know what it is also?
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: I reckon it's because The partners must be feeling so
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: stressed in that moment.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Like it's the one thing.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: They don't want to look like an absolute idiot when
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: they're about to have a child standing there with no
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: jocks on. Look, you taking your jocks off is what
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: started this whole process. I would like to put it
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: out there to the mums group. Did your partner free
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: ball it in the operating theatre?
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: We need numbers. How many people's husbands thought they had
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: to take their jocks off? I mean, it'd be pretty.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Cold in there because, I mean, it's a very sterile, pristine,
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: clean environment. Like, I don't know, everything feels cold. Like
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I wonder, a bit of shrinkage going on in there. Oh,
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: that'd be so uncomfortable, you know, when you get a
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: cold sweat. Mm. Do you think they think they have
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: to take their jocks off because there's all this stuff
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: said of like skin on skin, like they know they're
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: going to have to get their rig out at some
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: point and have the baby on their chest. Is that
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: because I think it's because men take everything so literally
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: and they were like, take your job. And it's like, no,
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: but also even though they're not the main character in
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: this situation in their head, they're the main character. So,
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: I've heard a lot of men say it's hard for
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: them being in hospital when their wife is having a
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: baby because everything's about the wife and there's not a
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: lot of guidance given to the dads. Well, thank goodness
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: for the person at this particular hospital who has taken
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: it upon themselves to to provide that guidance. My concern
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: is that's only in the private system. I think we
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: need something in the public system. Did you know what though?
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: A lot of the midwives.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: Treat the male partners as if they are a different
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: species or if they don't belong there.
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: They kind of treat them like they're a piece of shit.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: And I think it's because, to be fair to the midwives,
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: there are a lot of dirtbag.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: Men who go in there. Or throw in another stitch.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Because I've seen these TikToks and these midwives have gone
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: through some of the things that have happened in the
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: birthing suite. Like the men turning their PlayStations on or just,
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: or being like, where can I get some food? And
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: they're just like, your wife is giving.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Birth, you fuckhead. Hashtag not all men though.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: No, of course not all men. But I think that,
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: The midwives have seen the worst of the worst kind
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: of man in there.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: Why am I getting a flashback?
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: This is your birth story, Amy. Wasn't it that Dale,
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: when you arrived at the hospital, he wanted to get
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: McDonald's or something?
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Was that?
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: No, no, that was on the way to the hospital
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: after he cleared out the carport because it was full
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: of crap and he didn't want to have to look
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: at it while on paternity leave.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: It's its own form of nesting, wasn't it, really? It
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: really was. The day of the procedure, he's nesting. He's
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: getting some nervous energy out.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: Look, I cannot bag Dale out because he has– helped
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: us out. He's looked after Harry and Luca today so
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: we can record.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: It's so funny.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: We've got this joke because I think Kate, you've mentioned
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: it on the Mums group previously, that we don't like
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: to say to our sons that dad's at work.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: We say, oh, dad's at the office. So when we're podcasting,
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: we say we're at the office or we're podcasting.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: It's to say like, well, what we're doing at home
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: when we're looking after you and cleaning the house and
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: cooking and, you know, doing, looking after the child, that.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: Is still work. Of course.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: So I think that's a really good thing to say,
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: but it's hilarious because we've now created this joke that
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Dale lives in the doorbell.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: That he works in the doorbell.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Cause we have a ring doorbell. And so when
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: Harry comes outside, he always wants to press it and
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: Dale answers. So yeah, I feel like Harry's going to
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: grow up thinking his dad works in a doorbell.
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: Use Flash for any new mums. If you need your
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: big sister, tell your sweetie you're doing a great job.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: UK lifestyle influencer Elle Swift has a reminder for postpartum
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: mums in the thick of it. The mum of three
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: told her 640,000 followers to remember you were just a
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: girl and a hot one at that. I mean, I
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: think this is the pump up I personally needed for
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: my Wednesday morning. Let's take a listen to what Elle said.
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: I feel hot.
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: I feel like a hot mum.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: Because I've come back to myself. Because that stage of,
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: oh my gosh, I just live in motherhood. It just
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: doesn't last forever. I'm a hot mum. You're a hot mum.
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: Whether you feel it or not, you're a hot mum.
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: And also, you're just a girl. In case no one's
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: actually given you that little justification of your big feelings
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: at the moment, you're also just a girl. Don't forget
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: about her.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: Your date night.
• 6:34
  Speaker 4: Yes, you deserve it. Solo shopping trip. I've just come
• 6:37
  Speaker 4: back from a solo shopping trip this afternoon. No kids.
• 6:40
  Speaker 4: I love my kids. They're my bestest friends in the
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: whole entire world. But a solo shopping trip. Yes, I
• 6:45
  Speaker 4: deserve that. I deserve to feel good about myself. I
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: deserve to feel like I live a great life. I
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: deserve to feel good in my business. I deserve to
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: feel good in every aspect of my life.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: I feel like we just sometimes need a solo shopping trip.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: That's all you need for your mental health.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: Because like even doing any little activity that you used
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: to take for granted before you had a child, it
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: just seems 10 times better when you get to do
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: it by yourself. This cracks me up because you sent
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: me a TikTok this week, Soph, and it was this
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: woman who had just been on a shopping spree. And
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: she was like, just so you know, boy mums, your
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: sons will get to an age where all they want
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: is dad.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: And it's great because you can go and do things
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: like go shopping by yourself.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: I know that I'm in desperate need of a solo
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: shopping trip at the moment because I have been researching
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: new clothes, which seems to happen around this time every year.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: Like I feel like I need to rejuvenate my whole wardrobe.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: And then I get to the point where it's almost
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: spring and I'm like, is there any point?
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: Because all these clothes, winter clothes are going to go
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: to waste anyway.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: But I usually hate going in-store and trying on things,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: but I have this urge that I really need to.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: Go in-store and that makes me realise I'm missing it.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: I feel like this is our way of getting to
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: do things we want doing this podcast because we'll mention
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: something on here and then our husbands will feel so
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: bad that they'll literally plan us a trip and be like.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: Oh, here you go, go on your shopping trip, it's
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: all good, which is lovely of them.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: We need to do a shout-out to our husbands because
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: at family dinner the other night they surprised us by
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: booking a penthouse for when we go and see Hilary
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: Duff in Melbourne.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: And I was so taken aback.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: Like I didn't even get it because my husband put
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: in our group chat this link to the penthouse and
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh, is this where you think we
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: should stay? And he's like, no, this is what we've
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: booked for you. Like you guys really deserve it. We
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: were like, oh, we'll send you the money for it.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: Like what are you talking about? And they're like, what
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: are you talking about?
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: This is a gift. We've literally organised this for you.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: I thought it was a suggestion at first.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: It's so lovely because we're also going over to do
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: some interviews and they're like, we've booked it so you
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: guys can set up your interviews. And it's funny because
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: two of the interviews, I think listeners of the Mums
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: group could guess who one of them is.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: Well, we've been talking about it a lot. Purple Love Heart.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and the thought that the boys have booked us
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: out of Penthouse to do an interview with that particular
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: person is just hilarious.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: So thank you, guys.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: This actually does play into what we're talking about with
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: Elle here because she's talking about girlhood and I have
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: seen a lot of girlhood content in my feed recently,
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: there's this reminder that all of us mums should remember
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: that we are still really young and we need to
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: indulge our inner girl. And I feel like the Hilary
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Duff concert is the perfect thing at the moment. I'm
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: seeing a lot of millennial mums saying that they're reliving
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: their teenage years by making costumes for it. Victoria Devine
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: is currently making a Hilary Duff themed costume.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Oh, what's she doing? Oh, it looks so intricate.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: Like she was clipping together pieces of like circular plastic.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: I think she's trying to make One of the dresses
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: that Hilary wears on stage.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: It's the star one.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: It's like all these stars that are connected. But this
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: is so reminiscent of what we saw at the Eras
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Tour as well.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: And I just think it's.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: So beautiful because you do get caught up in the
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: mundaneness and putting everyone else first. And you sort of
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: forget that you too are a person and used to
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: have all your dreams and aspirations. And even though you
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: are a mum, you need to make time for all
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: of those things that make you happy too. I saw
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: a lot of videos of mums who were stealing their
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: daughter's butterfly clips. to add to their costumes for the
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Hilary Duff concert. I did see some comments where people
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: were like, there's some confusion. This is a Hilary Duff concert,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: not a Lizzie McGuire concert.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: I think though, if people want to dress as Lizzie,
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: That's up to them. I mean, I'm not policing. I
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: think everyone should have fun.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: I mean, I know this is a mum's podcast, but
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: just to focus on Hilary, she is a mum herself,
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: so I feel like we can talk about her. The
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: thing I don't understand is I have always seen Hilary
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: as Hilary Duff, the singer. I don't see her as
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Lizzie anymore.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: I don't. That's the point I think a lot of
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: people are making.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I feel like the people who are like Lizzie McGuire,
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: they're like the fickle fans. Getting back to Elle, this
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: is a big 180 for her because just 18 months ago,
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: she was in the depths of newborn life. She had
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: just had a third child. So she has three under four,
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: which is pretty crazy. And she said that she was
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: the definition of a hot mess. She was so sad
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: and she was being so mean to herself about her
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: body image. But She wanted to remind mums in the
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: thick of it that you don't lose yourself forever and
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: things do get better.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: Let's take a listen to what she said. I've got
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: to tell you, I'm.
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: On top of the world, babe. I'm living a great life.
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: My kids are my bestest friends. I'm out of the
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: newborn stage. It's a gorgeous stage, but we all know
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: it takes out of you after a nine-month pregnancy and
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: then pushing a baby out. Just in case you need reminding,
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: this stage doesn't last forever, okay? Look at the sun
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: shining as I tell you that. It's literally meant to be, babe.
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: Every stage of motherhood is so fleeting and I know
• 11:29
  Speaker 4: you might not be feeling like yourself right now, that
• 11:31
  Speaker 4: you might not recognise the body you're in right now.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: The thing that disturbed me most about this, though, was
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: that she said she's feeling so good she's considering having
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: her fourth child, maybe even twins. I was like, babe,
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: just stop because I think this is what happens. You
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: have what, like an 18, like your child turns 18
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: months and suddenly your hormones have leveled out. I'm wondering
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: if it's going to happen with you guys because I'm
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: at the state where I'm forgetting how difficult newborn life was.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: And it's like, oh, you know, a.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: Lot of people around me, like my, as I mentioned,
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: my brother-in-law is about to have a baby. So many
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: of my friends are about to have babies. And I'm like,
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, is it our time now? Romanticizing it.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: Well, it's not so much romanticizing.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: It's also thinking, Because I don't know, I feel like
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Rhys and I seem to have our baby just before
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: everyone else did.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: And you kind of, it's kind of good if you time.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: It when there's the rush of other people having a baby,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: whereas then you're just the people with the newborn that
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: no one has time to hang out with. See, I'm
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: more seeing other people having newborns as a bit of
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: a social experiment for myself because.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: I'm like- See how it goes. See how it goes.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: You know, my sister-in-law's having a baby soon as well.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: She's going to have two under two. Like I don't
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: want to commit myself to that before I actually see
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: what it's like. Yeah, it's good that it's playing out
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: and you can kind of see how you feel watching it.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: It's like are you filled with, oh, I'm glad that's
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: not me or is there a bit of you that's like, oh,
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: that would be nice.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: Jealousy. Well, Elle's husband probably was a bit shocked watching this.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: She said that he'd be like, what the hell, because
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: they said they were done at having three and she
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: said that when she was on her way to the shops,
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: she did a spiritual call out for her potential baby
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: to show her a sign and she asked for.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: The baby to show her a purple butterfly.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Now, she said that she did not see a purple butterfly,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: but she wanted to make the point that despite all
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: of the hard times she's gone through, she would do
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: it again. I love her attitude, but I'm guessing she's
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: at that couple of days in her cycle. I think
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: it's before you ovulate where you're on the top of
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: the world and you're like, I could do anything.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: And then a couple of.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: Days later, it comes all crashing down. You're in your
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: luteal phase and you're like, where's my chocolate? And why
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: am I so mad? I found her positivity intoxicating. Like
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: I was like, I need to be on what she
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: is like high on life.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: You need to shop. I need to shop. I need
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: to feel hot. I need a matcha.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: She was looking good, wasn't she? I feel like when
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: you do put a bit of an effort in and
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: have new clothes, you.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: Feel good about yourself. But it's also perspective.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: It's a perspective of realising where she was 18 months
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: ago in the thick of it.
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: And it's just a season as well. Yeah, she's now
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: seen light at the end of the tunnel.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: Australian fashion brand Dish has sparked debate online after it
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: announced it was expanding its.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Paid parental leave program.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Under the new policy, parents of children under 12 will
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: be given an additional two weeks of paid leave annually. Now,
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: despite Dish's new policy putting them ahead of most retailers,
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: critics say it's unfair to child-free workers. I actually can't
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: believe this backlash. In fact, it's really pissed me off
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: because this policy from Dish is great. I want to
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: get into what they're actually offering. So this new feature
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: of its parental leave policy is phase four of its rollout.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: So not only does DISH provide its workers with the
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: ability to take leave for early pickups, sick kids, school transitions,
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: all of that, they also provide paid parental leave every
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: step of your parenting journey. So if you're someone who's
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: looking at IVF treatment, freezing your eggs, surrogacy and adoption planning,
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: you are also provided with paid parental leave. They also
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: provide their workers with 16 weeks parental leave as well
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: as financial support flexible options and coaching for the first
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: eight weeks when you return to work. I think that
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: these child-free people need to be reminded that their life.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: Is a holiday.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: Now that might be an unpopular opinion, but that is
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: one I have come to since having a child because
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: when you don't have children, you have so much free
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: time to do whatever the fuck you want.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: And you don't realize it at the time. You are
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: restrained to.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: Your work, but if you generally enjoy your work, that's
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: freedom as well. But also parental leave isn't a holiday.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Like maternity leave, that is the toughest time of some
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: people's life. And this extra time parents are given is
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: to do stuff for their children. They're not having a break.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: They're not sipping cocktails on an island. Yeah, that was
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: one of the arguments. A lot of child-free people were saying, well,
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: that's unfair. They get two weeks of holidays. And parents
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: are saying, listen, their holidays or paid leave is taken
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: up when their.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Children are sick.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: So they'll have to take a paid day off. And
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: they're like, Looking after a sick child is not a holiday.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: You'd rather be at work. Yeah, 100%.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: I do actually think though that people should get paid
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: pet leave. Well, I think if you have an animal-
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: A lot of businesses do offer that. Yeah, I think
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: if you do have an animal that you care for,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: because that's equally as horrendous. Well, when Dish announced this
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: new policy, it said, ambition and motherhood are not opposing paths.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: Modern companies need to evolve. We believe women deserve to
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: have both a career and a family should they choose
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: without compromise. This is how we modernise work. This is
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: the standard she deserves. Now, when you look at this policy,
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: it actually is the first of its kind that offers
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: continuing support to parents. So most parental leave only sort
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: of acknowledges when the baby's born. You don't then get
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: that ongoing support. And this is what I really like
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: about this new policy. That's one of the things that
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: I've found so difficult to get my head around since
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: becoming a parent.
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: I'm not even a parent of a school-aged child, but just.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: Knowing how much time and effort goes into your child
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: and then thinking, hang on, The workplace really isn't set
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: up for parents. Like how are you meant to drop
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: your kid off at school before you go to work.
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: And then pick them up during work time?
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: Like that is really difficult for people who don't have
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: a village around them that don't have grandparents to help
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: pick their kids up.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: Or maybe they can't afford to put them in after
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: school care.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: So really that puts a lot of pressure on women
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: and also men, but one of the parents to go
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: part time.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: And I think that's what irritates me so much about
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: this talk about working from home, because obviously one of
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: the benefits from working from home is that you don't
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: have to commute. So you can work your day around, okay,
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: I need to pick my kids up this time. And
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: let me tell you, there's no one working harder than mums.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: And they are definitely making up the time that they
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: use when they go pick up their kids.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: They're doing work after hours. Well, that's why it's.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: So frustrating to see this negative reaction from a lot
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: of child-free advocates. So one person wrote, having children is
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: a choice. That should be built into your work decisions.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: I don't believe parents should get extra paid time off
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: of work. Another said that's special treatment and completely unfair
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: to those who work hard and don't have children. Now,
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: others argued that providing mums with additional benefits wasn't a
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: quality and that all women should receive the same.
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: Oh, come on.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: While many small business owners argued that they simply couldn't
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: afford to roll out similar policies. It's interesting because Dish
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: is obviously a company that predominantly hires women. So this,
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: you know, the only downside, I suppose, of a policy
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: like this and if it was to become the norm
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: and it was only given to women is that companies
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: may not want to hire women because they don't want
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: to give out more paid parental leave. But surely this
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: benefit should be given to mothers and fathers. Well, one
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: TikTok user, she put it so well. She said, the
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: fashion industry is made up of predominantly women. Most end
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: up leaving the industry because it's not a career that
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: goes hand in hand with being a mum. I guarantee
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: all the working mums at Dish would be working 10
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: times harder, even with the extra time off. Could almost
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: guarantee they would do more work at home after they
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: had to go pick up their kids early from school.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: The fashion industry works fast and the women work extremely hard.
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: The other women working there without kids would definitely have
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: other benefits. They're probably more likely to be promoted into
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: manager roles. They can also travel at the drop of
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: a hat. I wouldn't go comparing the two and definitely
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: wouldn't compare other industries. What she said is so bang
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: on and it's quite interesting because it echoes a conversation
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: I've recently had with a client. So Amy and I
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: have a PR agency, but we have really cut back
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: since having our kids. And we only work on particular
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: clients and very special projects. And I was talking to
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: this client and she was saying that she loves hiring mums.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: because she knows how hard they work and how hungry
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: they are to prove everyone wrong. So she said, not
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: that she has a preference when hiring people, but she
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: said that she knows that mums just go to.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: The next level.
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: And you just get shit done in such a short
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: period of time.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: Well, Sydney content creator, Maddie Gilbanks, she said, Those criticizing
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: the policy clearly misunderstood it. She said, there's a reason
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: you've chosen not to have kids and that's because you
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: understand and recognize that there is a significant burden placed
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: on your life if you choose to have kids. They
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: take up so much time, more energy. She went on
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: to say that parents were not taking leave to go
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: away on holiday because They were caring for children. Just
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: a caveat there. Maddie is referring to people who choose
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: not to have children. So obviously there are a group
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: of people that would really love to have children and
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: it's just not possible for them.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: So I do want to point that out.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: I really agreed with Maddie's point because I think if
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: you look at a lot of the child-free content, a
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: lot of the creators talk about the number one reason
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: for not having children is because of the workload associated
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: with it. They want to live their fabulous life. They
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: want to go on holidays. They know that having a
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: kid isn't a holiday. Also, they've got the time to
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: be the ones squabbling in the comment section, jumping up
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: and down about how unfair it is. To be fair,
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: there were a lot of child-free people who were saying,
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: oh gosh, give the mums the holidays.
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: They deserve it.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: So it's hard because with all these newspaper articles about it,
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: it has become this mums.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: V child-free people. And it shouldn't be like that.
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: Even I feel like people are going to be offended
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: by you saying child-free people like that. Why?
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Well, let's, I mean, this is called
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: the mums group.
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: So I'm hoping that 99% of the people listening probably
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: will support what we're saying.
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: I think this is the disappointing thing.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: Like we shouldn't be pitting mums against people who choose
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: not to have children.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: Like, why can't we all exist as we are? Like,
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: I think it gets so.
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: Nasty online because people really want to defend their decision
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: and they feel like if someone doesn't follow it, like,
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: for instance, if you're a mother and then you see
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: these child-free people going on about what a terrible decision
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: it is to have.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Children, it does get your back up and you feel
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: like you've got to defend yourself.
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: And then it goes both ways because when people make
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: comments on people's decision not to have children, I can.
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: See why they'd want to defend themselves too.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: Can't we just let people decide what they want for
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: their own lives? And then if there are benefits set
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: up that might make that person's life easier, can we
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: not just let the person have it?
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: You also don't know what you don't know.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: I think before having kids, you really think that you're
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: super busy and that you just couldn't imagine squeezing in
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: anything else.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: It does make me reflect on what I would have
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: thought if this was rolled out at.
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: My workplace when I didn't have children, because It's terrible,
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: but I remember there would be mums that would leave
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: to pick up their kids from school and I'd be like, oh,
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: they're lucky getting to slip out.
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: And it's like, no, they weren't. They weren't lucky. They're
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: having a race around. Everyone's judging them.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: They then have to come back and make that time up.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: Also then work full time, you know, the bedtime routine,
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: you know, making dinner. And it's also the fact that
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: the majority of the time the woman is the default parent.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: And as we touched on, DISH is made up of 94%
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: female staff. So this initiative really is aimed at reducing
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: that gap between how females and males are treated in
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: the industry. It's making it more fair. And as DISH said,
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: they are hoping this encourages broader conversations across industries. And
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: they've actually encouraged other workplaces to reach out to them
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: to see what they're doing and how other workplaces can
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: also implement this. A video of Jack Viney being interrupted
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: by his young daughter mid-press conference has gone viral. So
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: the Melbourne Football Club shared this video and in it,
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Jack is trying to have a serious discussion about his
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: injury with the media when this happened.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: It's been much more kind of feel like we're getting back.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what is it?
• 23:48
  Speaker 4: Can we go on that now?
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay.
• 23:51
  Speaker 3: We'll go on the D train after I've finished talking
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: to all these people. All right?
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: Exactly. Hey, I'm coming back.
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: I'm coming soon.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: Must be a train of thought, but we'll be back soon.
• 24:07
  Speaker 4: No timeline.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, there's no timeline.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: You know, we thought we'd be back at round eight, but,
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: you know, that just didn't.
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: Didn't seem to be the case.
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: Um so uh yeah sorry repeat.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: That because this is an audio platform you will not
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: have seen jack's teammate standing next to him trying so
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: hard not to laugh you also not have seen Jack
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: Viney trying to cover his little girl's mouth with his hand.
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: In a very loving way, not in a gross way,
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: but he was like being like, be quiet.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, I think we've all been there. I think we've
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: all been there where we're like, please, please be quiet.
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: And you're trying to keep your cool. I mean, this
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: was being filmed as well. And you just know your
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: parenting is being judged. Well, the thing is, it was
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: quite a serious press conference about an injury as well.
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: So I think he was trying to remain on topic
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: and answer their questions. The thing that annoyed me was
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: In the comment section, a lot of people were saying,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: where's the mum?
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: I was like, fuck off.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: The mum has probably been looking after her all day
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: and she's dropped her down for a visit at the
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: footy club. Probably because it's a PR opportunity for him.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: The kid was probably rolled out to make him look
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: like a nice guy. And then she's been, oh, because
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: they had a train there. So they probably said to
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: the players, well, bring your kids down. We've got this,
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: the D train. What I'm wondering, cause I used to
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: be a media manager for professional sporting clubs. I'm surprised
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: that the media manager wasn't actually looking after the kid
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: or they didn't get one of the staff members to
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: be like, you come stand over here because she was
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: front and center. Like at one point she was standing
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: up at the microphone, tugging on the tracksuit pants, like,
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: come on dad.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: Like it was, it was so fun.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: I mean, My heart doesn't really bleed for this guy though,
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: because when you look at the stats, the average mom
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: is interrupted about every three minutes. So that is 400
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: plus mental resets each day.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: Did I send that to you?
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: You did.
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: I think I sent you that stat.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: And the studies say that disruption of focus elevates cortisol
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: and affects short-term memory. So Again, he was interrupted once
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: during a press conference, probably the one time during the
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: day he may have been interrupted.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: I did feel for him because it was quite embarrassing.
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: And I'm at the stage of parenthood where Harry's only
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: saying a few words, but I can only imagine how
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: anxiety inducing it must be when your child can actually
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: start speaking in full sentences because they just go roguelike.
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: Jack's been saying really hilarious stuff. Like the other day, Kate, you,
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: like we were at a cafe and we were.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: A little bit angry at you. So you'd gone to
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: the toilet. I think she stormed off.
• 26:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: And I said, I went to the toilet. I said
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: to Jack, I was like, does mommy yell at home?
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: And he was like, no, he was like defending you
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: the whole time. It was so sweet. Well, he's in
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: that stage.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: I had to Google it the other day where he's
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: saying that he dislikes things that he actually likes, but
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: as apparently it's this way of realizing that he is
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: his own person and he's trying to work out what
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: he actually does like and what he doesn't like. And
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: it is rather awkward because he'll say, I don't like
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: mommy or I don't like daddy or I don't like
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: auntie Amy or auntie Sophie. But then, then in the
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: next breath, he'll say he loves all of those things.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: I mean, he said he doesn't like cars and I'm like,
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: that is not true. So he's really trying to push
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: the boundaries and work out, well, what do I like?
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: It's like when kids go to school and they have
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: to report back, like isn't it in their diaries or whatever,
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: what they did over the weekend or draw pictures of it.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: And I remember our mum had a whole collection of
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: our books. And I feel like we'd written really embarrassing
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: things in there. Oh, I was so mean. Our mum
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: went back to university. I think we might have talked
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: about this when we interviewed her on the podcast. And
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: she was just so incredible. She was doing it part time.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: And I remember writing, my.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: Mum has a perfectly fine job and I don't understand
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: why she's doing this.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: I'm like, you little shit. Can you imagine the teachers
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: reading it? They'd be like, oh, this is juicy gossip.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: I remember one weekend, I think our dad was wearing
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: pyjama pants and they must have like lost elastic and
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: they fell down in front of everyone. And it must
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: have been quite an eye-opening moment because we all ended
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: up in our journals drawing a picture of his bare
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: ass with the pyjama pants falling down. I didn't see
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: that one.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: And being like, what the hell?
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: Millie Bobby Brown recently opened up on Jay Shetty's podcast
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: about her motherhood journey. So in 2025, she and her
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: husband welcomed their baby girl via adoption and she managed
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: to perfectly summarize the magic of motherhood.
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: Let's have a listen to what she said.
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: It's funny because my husband and I, we always say that.
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: And it's like, my life.
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: Was beautiful before. It was, it was, it was amazing.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: Like Jake and I, We built a very strong relationship, foundation.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: I have an amazing family.
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: I'm very close to his family.
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: But something about my daughter, it's just life-changing.
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: It's not about the day-to-day changing the diapers, you know,
• 28:55
  Speaker 3: taking them for walks, taking them to classes, feeding them.
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: It's not about that. That's not the color.
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: The color is like the life and light in her
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: eyes when you look at her and she's thinking and she's,
• 29:09
  Speaker 3: putting two and two together and she's seeing flowers or
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: smelling flowers for the first time or or reacting to
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: the sun in the morning like that is the color
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: like it's seeing somebody enjoy and love life for the
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: first time in the most pure stunning way that is
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: what makes it worth it I don't know if that
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: makes any.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: Sense That's so beautiful.
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: Okay, so Kat and Sophie are both crying. I am
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: on my period at the moment. What is wrong with me?
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: Before, if I heard something like that, that would just
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: absolutely not have any sort of reaction whatsoever.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: As I said, I didn't cry at my wedding. Bit
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: of an ice queen.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: But that, like, it's actually nice to hear people talking
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: about motherhood in a really– positive way like I probably
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: have been guilty myself of sometimes focusing on the negatives
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: but like just to hear you know because you can't
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: get like bogged down in the mundanity mundane what's.
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: That word mundane this I don't know of.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: You know those early years but just yeah those moments
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: she captured it so well like seeing things through their
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: eyes for the first time is so magic and said
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: in an English accent it said it even.
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: Why did I feel like I was putting on Yeah,
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: how beautiful is that? I saw that and I was like, oh,
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: that's so sweet. I need to bring that to the
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: mums group because do you.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Remember having that discussion about before when you didn't have
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: kids and people would whinge about it and then be like, no, no,
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: but it's the best, it's the best, and you just
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: wouldn't understand. I think that's one of the– I think
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: that's such a good description of– why motherhood is so
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: beautiful for those moments. And why it's so indescribable, but
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: like we've all teared up just because we know the feeling,
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: like the feeling of it, which is so hard. And
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: I mean, she perfectly summarized it, but I still think
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: someone maybe who doesn't have children might not fully get it.
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: And that's fine because you haven't like, how do you,
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: how do you, relate to that if you haven't experienced
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: watching someone that you love with your whole heart you
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: know looking at the world for the first.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Time I saw someone right under it they said I
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: feel this when looking at my dog.
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: I mean I totally get that too to be fair
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: I think it's.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: Just the innocence that children have as well like those
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: special years before they go to school and you're their
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: whole world and you know you can't even picture someone
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: being nasty to them like the thought of someone at
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: school bullying them. Like, oh my God, like I'm going
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: to be that mother in, what is that movie, that 40,
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: when she turns 40?
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: And she's like, your eye cut and your eye part
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: and we'll shove it up your eye.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: I'm going to have to include a grab of that
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: to keep conduct because people will have no idea what
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: you're talking about. I was saying today or the other day,
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: I really wanted to watch that movie because I feel
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: like I'd relate to it.
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: I also want to watch Have a Girl's Night. I
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: watch Bad Mums with you guys because as I was
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: telling Sophie. There's a Christmas one too. Yeah, there's a
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: scene in it.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: I saw, I think it was on TikTok, a scene
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: and this mother was like, sometimes I just fantasize about
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: being in a car accident where I'm not fully injured
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: but injured enough to be in there for a couple
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: of nights.
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: See, everyone's like, what the fuck? This is right.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: The conversation's gone real lowbrow since we had that tears.
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: I feel like this is our tolerable way of trying
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: to get back onto a bit of a comedic thing.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: But that is my– I need– that is my reminder
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: to go and get this fucking golf ball off my wrist.
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Like it is– beyond bad at the moment, isn't it?
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: I need a bit of a break. People who are
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: listening for the first time might not realize what your
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: golf ball on your wrist is. It is a ganglion cyst,
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: which has been haunting me since before I was pregnant.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: So I blame weeding in the garden.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: You guys say it's my phone addiction, but I think
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: it might be a bit of column A bit from
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: column B.
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: It has gotten massive.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: Like when I was on my honeymoon, when I was
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: 10 weeks pregnant, I literally, I took a photo and
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: I thought it was bad then.
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: It was like a little, like a little lump. It's
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: just disgusting. You're a lovely lady. It's only going to
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: get worse. I do want to. I reckon there's two
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: of them happening.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: Look, I want to steer the conversation back onto our
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: beautiful crying moment because mum sent me and you guys
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: this because our boys love cars.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: And she said. Oh no, please. I don't want to
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: hear this.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: One day the Hot Wheels will be packed away. The
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: races will end. And the, Oh, my God, Kate. And
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: the little voice asking me to play will grow quieter.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: Why are we not filming this?
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: Your husband's going to be listening. I'm going to be like,
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: what the hell? And I already know a piece of
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: my heart will miss this chapter forever. Okay.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: All right, let's get a member that, you know. My
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: son's 13 months old. He still has a lot of
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: this to enjoy. Do you know about shopping?
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: Do you know about– after that they go into the
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: stage where they weren't daddy and they– Maybe.
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: I do want some more. Maybe I do want some twins. No,
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: I'm just joking. Oh, my God. No, I'm joking.
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: Well, that is lovely that you guys have– there's so
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: many emotions going on in this room. Are we doing recommendations?
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: Are we sending it there? Do you know what?
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: I reckon that I need to just chuck a couple
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: of these Hot Wheels on the ground for you to
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: step on with no shoes on and then you might
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: not be so sad again.
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: Well, I think that's all we have time for today.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening to what was quite
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: a funny but now emotional episode.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: Everyone's turned to emo, haven't they? Kate can't even continue.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: She's been crying so much. I'm just embarrassed. It's lovely
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: to be that intact.
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: Well, it's lovely.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: Lovely.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: Do you remember originally we got a few complaints about
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: our content being quite negative towards motherhood?
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: Look where we are. Crying on the mics full circle.
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, thank you so much for listening to The
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: Mums Group. If you did enjoy it, we would love
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: if you could recommend it to one of your mum friends.
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: And if you're feeling even more generous and have the
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: time to do it, which probably you don't, but anyway,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: if you do, can you please leave us a five-star
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: review because it really helps the podcast grow. This episode
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: was recorded on the traditional land of the Kaurna people
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: of the Adelaide Plains.
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: We pay respect to elders past and present.