Latest / Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing / #144| The Maycember Effect: Why You’re Overwhelmed and How to Solve It Without Guilt
Transcript
- 0:00Michelle Gauthier: You don't have to do it all, and you definitely don't have to do it all perfectly, even if your brain tells you that you do.
- 0:11Michelle Gauther: You're listening to Overwhelmed Working Woman, the podcast that helps you be more calm and more productive by doing less.
- 0:18Michelle Gauther: I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former Overwhelmed Working Woman and current life coach.
- 0:23Michelle Gauther: On this show, we unpack the stress and pressure that today's working woman experiences, and in each episode you'll get a strategy to bring more calm, ease and relaxation to your life.
- 0:38Michelle Gauthier: Friend, hi.
- 0:38Michelle Gauthier: I'm gonna start off today by being straight up with you and tell you that I, as of yesterday, described myself as hanging on by a thread, and you know what that has to do with.
- 0:50Michelle Gauthier: It has to do with the month of May.
- 0:51Michelle Gauthier: There are so many additional things that I have to do and that I'm sure you have to do too.
- 0:58Michelle Gauthier: I made a post about this because I counted and there were 16 additional things to my already full schedule that I had to do in May, and everyone who replied echoed the same sentiments.
- 1:10Michelle Gauthier: So we are not imagining it.
- 1:13Michelle Gauthier: I got all my podcast stuff ready to record this podcast for you and I thought to myself I can't, I've got to take a nap before I can even record this podcast.
- 1:22Michelle Gauthier: I am straight up exhausted, so I just had to lie down.
- 1:26Michelle Gauthier: Not only did I have to take a nap before I could record this podcast, but also I didn't meal plan this week because I didn't have time, and what that has meant is that I have had to order delivery for lunch.
- 1:39Michelle Gauthier: One day, I had delivery lunch and a protein bar for breakfast and dinner.
- 1:44Michelle Gauthier: How's that I don't think I'm hitting all my macros with that plan, and so if you're feeling like I am and you're just barely hanging on, this podcast is for you.
- 1:55Michelle Gauthier: It's going to be short.
- 1:56Michelle Gauthier: I'm going to tell you why May feel so overwhelming, one mindset shift that can help you calm the chaos and then give you some practical, do less tips that you can use this month.
- 2:09Michelle Gauthier: Let's dive in.
- 2:10Michelle Gauthier: Okay, let's just call it what it is.
- 2:12Michelle Gauthier: First of all, the craziness of May is real and also you're not alone.
- 2:16Michelle Gauthier: It's like school events, sports tournaments, graduation parties, field trips, events case.
- 2:24Michelle Gauthier: I had a couple work deadlines that I had to do too.
- 2:26Michelle Gauthier: I'm helping my older son study for finals.
- 2:30Michelle Gauthier: It's just sort of nonstop around here.
- 2:32Michelle Gauthier: The logistics and emotions and all of the things that have to happen in May is like Olympic level stuff.
- 2:42Michelle Gauthier: And then there's the part where we have to show up at work and still be a thoughtful partner and maintain friendships and remember to buy end of year teacher gifts.
- 2:52Michelle Gauthier: And, oh my gosh, if you are a teacher and you're doing all of this, both from the side of being a parent and the side of being a teacher, who you're amazing.
- 3:01Michelle Gauthier: Hang in there.
- 3:02Michelle Gauthier: So I think it's really important for us to just remember and you've probably heard this from me before but it's no wonder that we feel overwhelmed, because this is a really high volume month for invisible labor.
- 3:14Michelle Gauthier: You're carrying around more than most people can see.
- 3:18Michelle Gauthier: Probably another mom is the best person if you want to really be seen and understood.
- 3:23Michelle Gauthier: So if you feel like you're barely holding it together, you're totally normal, okay.
- 3:29Michelle Gauthier: The second thing I want to talk about is a mindset shift for you to consider, and that is that good enough is good enough, and this is the point where I want to offer you some relief from everything that's going on this month, because you don't have to do it all, and you definitely don't have to do it all perfectly, even if your brain tells you that you do, because you would prefer to do things -everything- A plus, but this is a great month for B minus.
- 3:55Michelle Gauthier: What I see in my coaching during all the months not just me but if we have a thought like, I have to do all these things and I have to do them perfectly, it leads to overwhelm 100% of the time, and when you're overwhelmed, you do basically nothing.
- 4:11Michelle Gauthier: You sit and spin in overwhelm, not knowing where to start or what to do first, and often we have negative self thoughts in that moment.
- 4:20Michelle Gauthier: So, in order to avoid that feeling of overwhelm, changing your thought and this might be an unconscious thought that you're having but I have to do all this, and I have to do it perfectly to doing my best with what I have today, or doing my best for today, is enough.
- 4:36Michelle Gauthier: Let me give you some specific examples of where you can do B minus work and still get the thing done.
- 4:42Michelle Gauthier: So I have a special person in my life who's graduating from college.
- 4:46Michelle Gauthier: She was our nanny for like eight years.
- 4:49Michelle Gauthier: She's one of my best friend's daughters and she's graduating from college and I'm ultra, ultra proud of her and I had this idea to get her like a cool leather work bag with her initials on it.
- 5:00Michelle Gauthier: That just sounded like the perfect gift for her, based on what I know about her.
- 5:04Michelle Gauthier: And then, as we get closer and closer, I'm thinking it's too late to order anything that's personalized.
- 5:10Michelle Gauthier: Then I was like maybe I can go somewhere and just buy it.
- 5:12Michelle Gauthier: No, I can't go somewhere and just buy it because I don't even have time to do that.
- 5:16Michelle Gauthier: So what I ended up doing is when I was taking my nephew to Target to buy him a present for his birthday, because he wanted to pick out his own present.
- 5:24Michelle Gauthier: I bought a graduation card and I went to the ATM at Target and I got cash and I am going to take the time to write her a really heartfelt note about how proud I am of her and I'm going to throw some cash in there and that's going to have to be good enough and she's still going to know I love her and even though it feels uncomfortable to me because I would really rather have gotten her that other thing, giving her the money and writing down my special words is enough.
- 5:50Michelle Gauthier: So where can you do something like that?
- 5:52Michelle Gauthier: Where can you downgrade your effort?
- 5:55Michelle Gauthier: The third thing I want to say is a strategy that I recommended in my newsletter a couple weeks ago.
- 6:01Michelle Gauthier: But just in case you don't get my newsletter, you should.
- 6:04Michelle Gauthier: If you don't, it's called Simple Sunday and it gives you good tips for the week.
- 6:07Michelle Gauthier: So sign up.
- 6:08Michelle Gauthier: In the show notes I'll put the link, but sign up for that if you don't get it.
- 6:11Michelle Gauthier: But if you did get it, you probably read it at the beginning of May and you might have forgotten the suggestions that I gave you.
- 6:16Michelle Gauthier: So I'm just going to remind you or tell you for the first time.
- 6:18Michelle Gauthier: Here's what I suggest you do Look at your calendar for May.
- 6:30Michelle Gauthier: Literally write, write down everything or highlight everything on your plate this month that is above and beyond your normal schedule.
- 6:33Michelle Gauthier: Look at the whole list of those things and ask yourself what can I let go of without feeling guilty?
- 6:39Michelle Gauthier: I was talking to another mom yesterday.
- 6:41Michelle Gauthier: She was telling me that her son has two different hockey tournaments this weekend and that he has a total of eight games.
- 6:47Michelle Gauthier: And she said I just cannot believe I have to go to eight games.
- 6:50Michelle Gauthier: And what we talked about was do you really have to go to eight games?
- 6:53Michelle Gauthier: Could you go to five games or two games, you know?
- 6:57Michelle Gauthier: Could you split with your partner, with his dad?
- 7:00Michelle Gauthier: So think about that for you.
- 7:05Michelle Gauthier: Just because it's on your calendar or your to do list doesn't mean you have to do it.
- 7:07Michelle Gauthier: See if there's something that you can cross off.
- 7:09Michelle Gauthier: I'm crossing off going to my daughter's horse lessons.
- 7:12Michelle Gauthier: She likes for me to stay there and like, video her and just be with her, and I have to cross that off during this time because I'm helping my other son study for finals.
- 7:21Michelle Gauthier: Not my other son.
- 7:22Michelle Gauthier: I only have one son.
- 7:24Michelle Gauthier: I'm helping my son study for finals, so I have to cross off my daughter's horse lessons.
- 7:30Michelle Gauthier: So now you have your remaining things.
- 7:32Michelle Gauthier: Look at those and see how you can simplify them.
- 7:35Michelle Gauthier: Can you make things easier?
- 7:37Michelle Gauthier: Can you batch errands, like how I was taking my nephew to Target and I got the graduation cards and also one for the handsome man friend's son who's graduating too, and went to the ATM while I was there.
- 7:47Michelle Gauthier: Can you batch your errands?
- 7:49Michelle Gauthier: Can you ask for help?
- 7:51Michelle Gauthier: I just texted my dad and asked him if he could take my daughter to the orthodontist on Monday, because I don't think I can swing it.
- 7:58Michelle Gauthier: So after you've made your list, crossed things off and simplified or made those tasks easier or made a plan to do B minus work, then we're left with the essential tasks and we have a toned down version of them.
- 8:12Michelle Gauthier: But I think it's just most important to remember that May does have a last day.
- 8:16Michelle Gauthier: May 31st we'll be here before we know it and we'll be into summer and hopefully things will be much more relaxing for you.
- 8:24Michelle Gauthier: But for now, I just want to remind you that you're enough.
- 8:26Michelle Gauthier: You're already enough.
- 8:28Michelle Gauthier: You have been enough in every month of the year so far and that I know if you're a person who listens to this podcast, you like to try your best at everything and you're doing a great job.
- 8:37Michelle Gauthier: Have a great week.
- 8:38Michelle Gauthier: I'll see you on Thursday.
- 8:39Michelle Gauthier: Thank you for listening to the overwhelmed working woman podcast.
- 8:47Michelle Gauthier: If you want to learn more about my work, head over to my website at michellegauthier.
- 8:51Michelle Gauthier: com.
- 8:53Michelle Gauther: See you next week.