Latest / The Bridges and Beacons Podcast / Get Your Sexy Back Through Yoga (In Real Life) with Julie Blamphin
Transcript
- 0:40SPEAKER_00: Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to the Mystic Nerd Sbud Podcast.
- 0:45SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Kelly Meyerson, and I am thrilled to be coming at you today with my friend Julie Blampin.
- 0:54SPEAKER_00: And let me tell you a little bit about Julie before we start off this very exciting episode.
- 1:00SPEAKER_00: Julie is an entrepreneur known for teaching yoga in real life.
- 1:04SPEAKER_00: Julie is a voice for unconventional strategies that help women feel joyful, stable, and sexy through quick and easy wellness wins.
- 1:14SPEAKER_00: Her work often touches on taboo topics, always highlights hope and healing, and is certain to tickle your fancy.
- 1:22SPEAKER_00: Julie, I'm so excited to have you here today.
- 1:25SPEAKER_00: Oh, and maybe we should start by saying you can guess based on the title that the conversation we're having today is probably not for little ears.
- 1:34SPEAKER_00: So if you're a mom listening to podcasts in her car, you might want to pop in an earbud.
- 1:40SPEAKER_00: If you're listening at home, you know, maybe take it to another room.
- 1:43SPEAKER_00: We'll give you a minute to do that or press pause and come back to us.
- 1:47SPEAKER_00: But Julie, welcome and thanks for joining me today.
- 1:50SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Kelly.
- 1:51SPEAKER_01: I am thrilled to be here and I'm glad you just said that.
- 1:57SPEAKER_01: That is a really awesome and very important uh disclaimer.
- 2:00SPEAKER_01: Because this is um this is gonna be a great conversation and uh and yeah, we want to know that we can, you know, that we can go there, that we can have uh have some of these uh discussions without holding back and without offending, without um without feeling like uh we need to uh uh uh quiet down, right?
- 2:21SPEAKER_01: We women have a way of doing that, and we don't want to do that sometimes.
- 2:24SPEAKER_01: So let's not do that here.
- 2:26SPEAKER_00: We'll just invite the right people to this conversation.
- 2:30SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes.
- 2:32SPEAKER_00: Thanks for having me.
- 2:33SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
- 2:34SPEAKER_00: So to start us off, just tell me a little bit about how you got started um in what you do and stretch your spirit.
- 2:44SPEAKER_01: Okay.
- 2:46SPEAKER_01: First of all, let me go way back before Stretch Your Spirit.
- 2:50SPEAKER_01: I started teaching gymnastics and yoga when I was about 12 years old, to be honest.
- 2:57SPEAKER_01: I was raised in a school of gymnastics in Western New York.
- 3:01SPEAKER_01: And uh my mom was the coach.
- 3:02SPEAKER_01: I was literally raised in the gym.
- 3:04SPEAKER_01: And um, so I was out in the gym and practicing gymnastics every day for probably from the age of six to 16.
- 3:13SPEAKER_01: Uh, but when I was about 12, my mom asked me to start working one-on-one with little special Olympians.
- 3:22SPEAKER_01: So we had the Special Olympics group in the area, yes, in Rochester, New York, who would come to our gym and practice the routines.
- 3:29SPEAKER_01: And some of the kids had paralysis, some of the kids were in wheelchairs, some of the kids had conditions that didn't allow them to get on the bars in the beam.
- 3:38SPEAKER_01: So they would sit on the floor and we would work on strength and stretching and sensation, which is pretty much yoga.
- 3:44SPEAKER_01: So I love this thing.
- 3:48SPEAKER_01: So I come by this naturally and organically.
- 3:52SPEAKER_01: And my mom is super, super yogi, and just the wisdom and and the intuition she holds is is quite profound still to this day, and she's turning 84 this year.
- 4:05SPEAKER_01: So I began Stretch Your Spirit in about 2008, 2009.
- 4:11SPEAKER_01: I trademarked and really founded the company.
- 4:15SPEAKER_01: I've been teaching women uh primarily ever since then.
- 4:19SPEAKER_01: So since about 2008, 2009, I was really going full throttle into this work, and it was more focused on yoga in the traditional general style, let's say, more of a HAFA practice.
- 4:42SPEAKER_01: And I did a lot of workshops.
- 4:44SPEAKER_01: As soon as I began, I would have a workshop every single month, and they would be themed on the chakras and body energy and all this groovy stuff, and I'd read from some of my favorite books.
- 4:56SPEAKER_01: And then I started recognizing because women started sharing with me, I started recognizing the commonalities between women and how prevalent the concerns when it came to our sexuality, when it came to our pelvis, primarily, low back, core, low belly, constipation, issues with libido, issues with bathroom habits.
- 5:25SPEAKER_01: And I started thinking, okay, this is a thing, and this is perhaps a direction that I should start leaning into.
- 5:34SPEAKER_01: And then the most interesting thing happened.
- 5:38SPEAKER_01: My mother came to me and said, um, I think I need a yoga routine, if you will, for what's called prolapse.
- 5:50SPEAKER_01: And sure enough, mom, because she was a gymnastics coach for 20 years, lifting up crash pads and kids and balanced beams and so physical and loved every second of it, but she was really, really physical in this career for 20 years.
- 6:08SPEAKER_01: And so her body was starting to whisper.
- 6:12SPEAKER_01: I like to say, listen to your body when she whispers because you don't want to hear her scream, right?
- 6:17SPEAKER_01: And so mom came to me and said, I've just been diagnosed with pelvic floor dysfunction in the form of prolapse.
- 6:26SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, okay.
- 6:27SPEAKER_01: So I did a bunch of research, and we absolutely, she's been doing this yoga routine, quote unquote, if you will, ever since.
- 6:36SPEAKER_01: And she's teaching the women in her community for the last 15 years uh so much of what she knows as well.
- 6:43SPEAKER_01: And she's still rocking and rolling and dancing and singing, and she's still maintaining the integrity of her pelvic floor, and all of her internal organs are still in her body, and she's never had surgery because she's doing the work that that that I teach primarily um through yoga and breath work and meditation.
- 7:05SPEAKER_01: So I come by this work naturally, organically.
- 7:09SPEAKER_01: I I it's it's why I'm here, and I'm super passionate about it because it's it's affecting so many of us.
- 7:18SPEAKER_01: So many.
- 7:19SPEAKER_01: It's it's really quite remarkable, Kelly.
- 7:22SPEAKER_01: You'll you'll see statistics out there maybe that say, oh, yeah, half of women will deal with pelvic floral dysfunction in their life, or maybe one third, or maybe one quarter.
- 7:31SPEAKER_01: I think that's just bullshit.
- 7:33SPEAKER_01: I think that it's way more than that because there are so many of us who aren't even talking about it.
- 7:37SPEAKER_00: Oh, right most people, I think, are not even talking about it.
- 7:41SPEAKER_00: There's so much shame.
- 7:42SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 7:43SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
- 7:43SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 7:44SPEAKER_01: And according to yoga tradition, energetically and emotionally we hold shame in this same area.
- 7:51SPEAKER_01: So what a burden.
- 7:53SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 7:53SPEAKER_01: So not just physically are we struggling, but emotionally and mentally and sexually and spiritually, and all of these levels of wellness, I call them, yeah, uh, are really wrapped up in this space.
- 8:06SPEAKER_01: And then what happens?
- 8:07SPEAKER_01: We disconnect.
- 8:09SPEAKER_01: Yep.
- 8:09SPEAKER_01: Because we're busy, we got shit to do.
- 8:12SPEAKER_01: We don't have time to deal with the leakage.
- 8:14SPEAKER_01: We don't have time to wonder why it hurts when we have sex.
- 8:17SPEAKER_01: We just don't have sex.
- 8:19SPEAKER_01: But that's a sacred energy, that's a sacred space.
- 8:24SPEAKER_01: These these patterns in our life, these these bathroom habits, these, these, these bedroom, I should say bathroom patterns, these, these bedroom patterns, these these responsibilities, if you will, of this musculature that's at the base of the pelvis is vital.
- 8:43SPEAKER_01: And it's such a big part of our life.
- 8:47SPEAKER_01: But when we have dysfunction, it just sometimes gets put low on the priority list.
- 8:52SPEAKER_00: Sure does.
- 8:53SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's so true.
- 8:56SPEAKER_00: And I I know I I work uh as a therapist, occupational therapist, I work with kids with special needs.
- 9:04SPEAKER_00: So it's so cool that your start was with kids with special needs.
- 9:08SPEAKER_00: That that really makes me smile because my kiddos love to move and groove in their own special way.
- 9:14SPEAKER_00: But yeah, um, I was just thinking about I work with a bunch of PTs and OTs and, you know, lunchtime conversations.
- 9:23SPEAKER_00: And I feel like it's just become so much less taboo to have those conversations, to talk about the things that are not going right in our bodies, you know, what might happen after you give birth, and to even just talk about like what is the pelvic floor and why, why is it so important?
- 9:44SPEAKER_00: Why didn't I ever know about this in my life?
- 9:47SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
- 9:48SPEAKER_01: I was just in a writing project.
- 9:50SPEAKER_01: So I've been in a couple of collaborative books published just uh just this year, and I've been writing about this stuff, and it's powerful, it's really powerful because think about it.
- 10:01SPEAKER_01: We we're female, right?
- 10:04SPEAKER_01: We're born with this sacred energy, we're born with this capacity for creation, we're born with the with the with the menstrual flow, which so many of us are like, oh, it's such a hassle, it's so dirty, it's so shameful, it's so embarrassing.
- 10:20SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'm bleeding, oh dot dot dot.
- 10:23SPEAKER_01: And then we wrap our heads and our hearts around this inconvenience and this negative perception of our body at such a young age.
- 10:35SPEAKER_01: And then we get into our 20s, 30s, 40s, and we're maybe so knee deep in kid stuff and careers that we don't have time to focus on it.
- 10:45SPEAKER_01: And then we're heading toward menopause, and you know, everything is is different.
- 10:50SPEAKER_01: We're like a hot mess for the rest of our days.
- 10:54SPEAKER_01: So we we so we need to start this conversation when we're young and say, listen, young female, listen, teen, tween, whatever, what have you.
- 11:06SPEAKER_01: You are an amazing, beautiful human.
- 11:10SPEAKER_01: And this monthly experience is sacred and this is why.
- 11:16SPEAKER_01: Is it inconvenient?
- 11:18SPEAKER_01: That's okay.
- 11:19SPEAKER_01: It's sacred and this is why.
- 11:20SPEAKER_01: It's sacred and this is why, it's sacred, and this is why.
- 11:23SPEAKER_01: Keep coming back to those positive messages, to that positive narrative when they're young, so that when we grow as women, we're not mired in shame, we're not mired in dread of the future.
- 11:42SPEAKER_01: The idea of menopause doesn't have to be this terrible thing.
- 11:46SPEAKER_01: This is part of our journey, but we can come back to the positive narrative.
- 11:52SPEAKER_01: So we're empowering ourselves instead of putting ourselves into a corner and staying small and dimming our light and saying that this stuff just shouldn't be talked about or dealt with because it's quote unquote normal.
- 12:06SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't get me started on that.
- 12:08SPEAKER_01: It's oh, I think I want you super common.
- 12:14SPEAKER_01: It's super common, but it doesn't mean it's normal.
- 12:16SPEAKER_01: We shouldn't be leaking.
- 12:17SPEAKER_01: I don't care if you've had a baby or four.
- 12:20SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we shouldn't be leaking.
- 12:21SPEAKER_00: Totally.
- 12:22SPEAKER_01: These are muscles, ladies.
- 12:24SPEAKER_01: So here we go.
- 12:25SPEAKER_01: The pelvic floor is at the base of the pelvis.
- 12:27SPEAKER_01: Okay, and as you sit, if you're out around the neighborhood and you're taking a walk, that's fine and good.
- 12:33SPEAKER_01: And maybe come back to this spot in the podcast later.
- 12:36SPEAKER_01: Um, but I want you to really feel this area of your body.
- 12:40SPEAKER_01: So if you're sitting, I want you to close your eyes.
- 12:42SPEAKER_01: I want you to wiggle your tail into that seat, sit up taller, take a nice deep breath, settle into that space right at the base of the pelvis, right where you are sitting on that chair, feel the base of the pelvis.
- 12:56SPEAKER_01: Maybe bring one hand to your low belly, relax your low belly, soften that space, and feel the bone right below the belly button, right above the clitoris, right above that space at the pelvic floor.
- 13:12SPEAKER_01: That bone, that that pubic bone there is the front of the pelvic floor.
- 13:17SPEAKER_01: So we have 16 muscles at the base of the pelvis, and they attach at the front of the pelvis at the pubic bone, that bone, right down there low.
- 13:28SPEAKER_01: And then on the sides of your pelvis.
- 13:31SPEAKER_01: So lift up one cheek now and reach your hand right under your cheek, and you can feel that bone there on the side under your cheek, that sit bone we call it in yoga.
- 13:40SPEAKER_01: That's our ischial tuberosity.
- 13:42SPEAKER_01: Now reach under the other cheek.
- 13:44SPEAKER_01: You can feel that other bone under there, that sit bone.
- 13:46SPEAKER_01: That's your ischial tuberosity on the other side.
- 13:48SPEAKER_01: Your pelvic floor attaches to both sides, and then reach back, follow your spine right down and just at the top of your bum crack, maybe right going down there into that space right down there, the tailbone.
- 14:03SPEAKER_01: Feel that tailbone.
- 14:04SPEAKER_01: Your pelvic floor attaches at the back of your pelvis at your tailbone.
- 14:09SPEAKER_01: So your pelvic floor is this wide and long front to back, side to side space of 16 muscles, three different layers of muscles and tissue that helps to hold in your internal organs.
- 14:25SPEAKER_01: It helps you with peeing, it helps you with pooping, it helps you with sexual activity, it helps you with orgasm, and it also helps you when you're sitting upright.
- 14:34SPEAKER_01: So sit upright, lean forward.
- 14:37SPEAKER_01: You can feel your pelvic floor activate.
- 14:39SPEAKER_01: Lean back round your back.
- 14:41SPEAKER_01: You might be able to feel it relax.
- 14:43SPEAKER_01: Lean to the left.
- 14:44SPEAKER_01: You feel it maybe activating and pulling on the right.
- 14:48SPEAKER_01: Lean to the right now.
- 14:49SPEAKER_01: You might feel it activating and pulling you back on the left.
- 14:52SPEAKER_01: So all of these things that we're doing in our days, our pelvic floor is like, woo-hoo, let's go, let's party.
- 15:01SPEAKER_01: It has all of these responsibilities.
- 15:04SPEAKER_01: However, we are doing some things that could be doing our body more harm than good.
- 15:13SPEAKER_01: So let me just give you a couple of tidbits.
- 15:18SPEAKER_01: And this is I'll try to leave some surprises for my freebie that I'm gonna share with your audience.
- 15:26SPEAKER_01: So I have a top three tips, and and I'm gonna share that, I'm gonna share that that link with your audience, and uh and and we'll keep those surprises for them.
- 15:36SPEAKER_01: But I'll tell you a few others.
- 15:38SPEAKER_01: If goodness gracious, there are so many misconceptions when it comes to sexuality and pelvic floor wellness, it really is quite remarkable.
- 15:46SPEAKER_01: But here are just a couple.
- 15:48SPEAKER_01: If you're peeing just in case, stop peeing just in case.
- 15:54SPEAKER_01: So so many of us are like, oh, I'm going to the store.
- 15:57SPEAKER_01: Oh, hang on a minute, let me go pee just in case.
- 16:00SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 16:01SPEAKER_01: Stop doing that.
- 16:03SPEAKER_01: And this is why your brain is what's thinking that, right?
- 16:09SPEAKER_01: Your brain is thinking, up going to the store, let me just go pee just in case.
- 16:13SPEAKER_01: Well, the bladder's like, girl, you don't have to pee yet.
- 16:18SPEAKER_01: But the brain's like, no, no, I'm gonna try.
- 16:20SPEAKER_01: Come on, bladder.
- 16:21SPEAKER_01: And so the brain is sending faulty messages to the bladder, and the bladder's like, dude, uh, maybe later.
- 16:29SPEAKER_01: And your brain's like, no, no, I'm going to the store.
- 16:32SPEAKER_01: Meanwhile, what's the big deal?
- 16:33SPEAKER_01: Go to the store, you're fine, right?
- 16:36SPEAKER_01: Even if you might leak, I promise you, if you start to decondition your body from go and pee just in case, you can decondition that propensity for leakage.
- 16:50SPEAKER_01: Trust me, don't trust your mind, don't believe everything you think, sister, because your mind is gonna go, yeah, no, you're you you probably should just pee just in case.
- 17:02SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 17:03SPEAKER_01: The mind is powerful, it's so huge, and it's so hard to convince yourself that right here, right now, I'm gonna resist the urge to pee just in case, because Julie Blampen of Stretcher Spirit told me that.
- 17:17SPEAKER_01: Well, the mind in that next moment, and it's these are fractions of seconds, right?
- 17:22SPEAKER_01: The mind is like, yeah, I don't believe her.
- 17:24SPEAKER_01: You should probably pee just in case because you got to go to the store and you gotta go into the store right now.
- 17:28SPEAKER_01: And God forbid you're, you know, talking to Sally in the in the pasta alley, and she's you know, talking about the family vacation, she's going on and on.
- 17:37SPEAKER_01: And what if you're standing there, you gotta pee?
- 17:39SPEAKER_01: I mean, these are thoughts that go through our mind.
- 17:41SPEAKER_01: Like, God forbid you're somewhere and you've got to pee, especially if you deal with leakage.
- 17:47SPEAKER_01: But we've got to do the work, yeah.
- 17:52SPEAKER_01: Because the definition of yoga is body-mind connection.
- 17:58SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 17:59SPEAKER_00: Wow.
- 17:59SPEAKER_00: You know, I was just thinking that.
- 18:02SPEAKER_00: I was thinking even earlier when you were talking about menstruation and like the the feelings or thoughts of inconvenience, there we we're so primed to disconnect from our bodies and be so in our heads all the time and overthinking that, like we tend, and I say this, you know, myself included, you know, suppressing what's happening below our necks and let go of the wisdom that our body already has.
- 19:57SPEAKER_00: So it sounds like what you're talking about is reconnecting to that wisdom.
- 20:01SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
- 20:02SPEAKER_01: I love that.
- 20:03SPEAKER_01: Reconnecting to that wisdom, and that's what it is.
- 20:07SPEAKER_01: That's what it is.
- 20:08SPEAKER_01: It's a beautiful sacred wisdom that we should be, and I don't like to use the word should, but we should be connecting to that wisdom over and over and over.
- 20:20SPEAKER_01: And that's our yoga practice.
- 20:22SPEAKER_01: That's what I'm teaching, that's what I'm preaching, and that's what I'm practicing.
- 20:26SPEAKER_01: Trust me, I have my own pelvic floor concerns myself, but I'm managing.
- 20:33SPEAKER_01: I was raised in a school of gymnastics.
- 20:35SPEAKER_01: I was a gymnast ever since I could freaking walk for goodness' sake.
- 20:39SPEAKER_01: I was so tight my entire childhood because I was a gymnast.
- 20:45SPEAKER_01: I'm 57 this year, and I am still dealing with tightness and clenching.
- 20:50SPEAKER_01: I deal with a bit of anxiety too.
- 20:52SPEAKER_01: I'm in menopause too.
- 20:54SPEAKER_01: So there's all of this tension in my body.
- 20:57SPEAKER_01: And don't get me wrong, tension is very important.
- 21:00SPEAKER_01: These muscles need to know how to tense.
- 21:04SPEAKER_01: They need to know how to engage and clench and and find strength, but not all the time, right?
- 21:12SPEAKER_01: So if we're clenching, if we're tense, if we're moving so fast every day and not taking moments of pause, then those muscles in your deep foundational core at your pelvic floor are probably really high tone.
- 21:31SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 21:32SPEAKER_01: It's called hypertonic pelvic floor muscles can be very painful.
- 21:38SPEAKER_01: And this can be the reason for your low back pain.
- 21:40SPEAKER_01: This can be the reason for your uh super tight hamstrings or iliotibial band on the side of the thigh.
- 21:47SPEAKER_01: This can be the reason for your knee issues, this can be the reason for uh why you have to go pee like right now.
- 21:55SPEAKER_01: If you're out there hearing this and I'm saying something that's resonating with you, do not hesitate to click on that link on in the show notes that that gets you connected with me.
- 22:07SPEAKER_01: You know, get my top three tips because some of this stuff is so easy and you can be doing it like right now.
- 22:15SPEAKER_01: Right now, you can be practicing it.
- 22:17SPEAKER_01: But having someone to support you, this is our area of support.
- 22:21SPEAKER_01: And so many of us don't feel supported.
- 22:24SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 22:25SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 22:25SPEAKER_01: We think that we're in this alone.
- 22:27SPEAKER_01: We think that we're we're dealing with the the memories and the trauma of sexual assault, or we're dealing with the memories and the trauma of not having that same body that we did before before childbirth.
- 22:41SPEAKER_01: We're dealing with some of these these concerns in this and this discontent and this disconnection with this emotional space in our body.
- 22:53SPEAKER_01: And so connecting with me because I have a community.
- 22:59SPEAKER_01: I have a community of women just like you, listener.
- 23:02SPEAKER_01: I have a community of hundreds of women, and we're all in this together, we're all going through it, and it's a beautiful thing, but just knowing some of these little tips and tricks that we can practice every day along the way for quick, little, easy, little simple little wellness wins.
- 23:21SPEAKER_01: Ah, it's the it's the it's the eureka moment.
- 23:25SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's it's real life, and there are so many things you can be practicing in real life that will make all the difference in the world.
- 23:35SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I love that.
- 23:36SPEAKER_00: And I'm just gonna take like a dial back.
- 23:38SPEAKER_00: You talked earlier about a book.
- 23:41SPEAKER_00: This is actually how I met Julie.
- 23:43SPEAKER_00: Um, she wrote her chapter.
- 23:45SPEAKER_00: It is Think Outside the Box Five Creative Ways to Get Your Sexy Back.
- 23:50SPEAKER_00: Um, you can also find uh my chapter on advice for sleep, but this is a great book, Hot Mess to Hot Mom.
- 23:57SPEAKER_00: And it's it's transformation.
- 23:58SPEAKER_00: Informational tools for thriving after childbirth and beyond.
- 24:02SPEAKER_00: But I want to tell you, any one of these chapters could probably touch upon something you need in your life.
- 24:09SPEAKER_00: And I love that your chapter in particular, Julie, you really, I feel like you're talking to the full age spectrum of women, not just brand new moms.
- 24:20SPEAKER_00: Because most brand new moms might not even be able to pick up a book and read.
- 24:24SPEAKER_00: This might be something you're grabbing a few months down the line when you start to just surface a little bit from what it's like having a newborn.
- 24:33SPEAKER_00: Um, but I really, I really loved that about your chapter that I really felt it spoke to, you know, all women.
- 24:41unknown: Yeah.
- 24:42SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
- 24:43SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
- 24:43SPEAKER_01: I think that's important because once we get to a certain stage in our life, yes, I talk mostly to midlife and menopausal women when I'm doing my keynotes and workshops and public speaking.
- 24:57SPEAKER_01: But where do we start?
- 25:00SPEAKER_01: Where should I say where should we start?
- 25:03SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 25:04SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 25:04SPEAKER_01: I mean, there are women who are coming to me talking about their kid who's in junior high or or or younger who is leaking.
- 25:12SPEAKER_01: And well, she's an advanced, she is um, I won't say advanced, that that was the language for gymnastics, advanced gymnasts.
- 25:19SPEAKER_01: She's she's um playing lacrosse or playing field hockey or or like full-time, full throttle ever since she was six, for example, right?
- 25:30SPEAKER_01: Well, these kids are running and jumping and laughing and breathing and maybe not even aware of of how to do so, right?
- 25:40SPEAKER_01: I mean, there are ways that we can move our body, whether we're holding a lacrosse stick, or whether we're running, or whether we're standing on the sidelines and we have to pee, or whether we're um moving through a core workout during practice.
- 25:58SPEAKER_01: I mean, there are ways in which we can move our bodies that are safe, instead of just let's just do this real quick and let's not leave enough time.
- 26:09SPEAKER_01: And I'm generalizing, but we typically don't leave enough time to relax and to stress.
- 26:14SPEAKER_00: I oh my gosh, that was 100% what I was thinking in my mind, because you know, I I my favorite topic is sleep, but very closely linked to that is rest.
- 26:27SPEAKER_00: And uh sleep is not rest, and rest is not sleep.
- 26:31SPEAKER_00: Like they are two separate entities.
- 26:34SPEAKER_00: So as you were saying earlier about muscles being always in a state of being clenched and held tight, like many of our kids are not getting rest, um, especially those that are highly involved in many things.
- 26:50SPEAKER_00: And that's a high value.
- 26:53SPEAKER_00: I'm obviously general generalizing for kids in school, but um, at least in in my experience, being busy is sort of considered good productivity, and that's uh check positive, you're succeeding.
- 27:07SPEAKER_00: Um, but there's not really a lot of time to rest and to allow our bodies to rest.
- 27:15SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, correct.
- 27:17SPEAKER_01: Or we think we're resting when we're plopped on the sofa staring at our phones, right?
- 27:22SPEAKER_01: Which is so under the pelvic floor.
- 27:24SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 27:25SPEAKER_01: It's so bad for your body and your mind and your nervous system, and it's so bad for your pelvic floor because you're just sitting on it, giving it nothing.
- 27:33SPEAKER_01: It's not relaxing that deep, deep core.
- 27:37SPEAKER_01: It's not giving your nervous system the honor and the and the space that it needs to release some of this pent-up energy, release some of this pent-up clenching.
- 27:51SPEAKER_01: So finding ways to do this intentionally is so important.
- 27:55SPEAKER_01: You mentioned um, you mentioned what I mentioned about uh super clenched pelvic floor muscles.
- 28:02SPEAKER_01: Well, there's the other end of the spectrum too.
- 28:05SPEAKER_01: And um so yeah, I like to say not all pelvic floors are created equal.
- 28:10SPEAKER_01: Um, and and often we are either clenching all the time or we're not clenching at all.
- 28:17SPEAKER_01: So um, and some of us clench sometimes, and that that wreaks havoc on the rest of our structure and the rest of our stability in our in our body.
- 28:29SPEAKER_01: And then some of us are are pushing when we sit down for, you know, like for example, constipation.
- 28:37SPEAKER_01: Like if you're sitting on the toilet and you're pushing, you you please connect with me because there's a there's a there's a better way.
- 28:44SPEAKER_01: There are so many things that you can be practicing that can make this uh activity of of bathroom habits easier, to be frank.
- 28:57SPEAKER_01: I mean, there are just some very simple poses, yoga poses, and or abdominal massage, for for example.
- 29:05SPEAKER_01: There are there are other ways in which you can move your body and and have your body when you are sitting on the toilet, for example, uh, that can make this moment easier.
- 29:17SPEAKER_01: But pushing, think about what happens when we're pushing.
- 29:20SPEAKER_01: We're we're bearing down into that space, into that musculature that is like, please stop pushing.
- 29:26SPEAKER_01: You're you're stretching me.
- 29:28SPEAKER_01: You're you're you're you're jeopardizing the integrity of this stability here.
- 29:34SPEAKER_01: And so that's what happens when we are a gymnastics coach for 20 years.
- 29:39SPEAKER_01: That's what happens when we sit on the toilet and we push all the time.
- 29:42SPEAKER_01: That's what happens when we have a chronic cough.
- 29:46SPEAKER_01: That's what's happening when we have a chronic cough.
- 29:48SPEAKER_01: We're bearing down into that, into that pelvic floor space.
- 29:53SPEAKER_01: Just have a just cough uh right now, listener, and and yeah, feel it.
- 29:58SPEAKER_01: Yeah, feel what happens in your pelvic.
- 30:00SPEAKER_01: You can feel what happens in your pelvic floor.
- 30:03SPEAKER_01: So maybe we could do things differently.
- 30:06SPEAKER_01: Maybe we could do things differently when we laugh.
- 30:09SPEAKER_01: I was teaching a workshop years ago called Celebrate the Pelvic Floor, and one of the women came up to me and said, I know I've been maybe looking a little sad or not like I'm enjoying this, I'm really enjoying this, but while everyone else is laughing, I'm trying not to laugh because I leak.
- 30:30SPEAKER_01: And I thought, oh goodness, okay, all right.
- 30:33SPEAKER_01: And that was a moment for me.
- 30:37SPEAKER_01: And so I am a certified laughter yoga leader.
- 30:42SPEAKER_01: And I love that.
- 30:44SPEAKER_01: If you follow me on social media, you'll see that I do laughs, I share laughs, and yeah, just yesterday I shared one on Facebook, uh 30-second laugh.
- 30:55SPEAKER_01: Uh, but I actually teach women how to laugh without leaking.
- 31:01SPEAKER_01: Because we need to laugh, we need to cultivate that joy within our body because all of a sudden we get down the road and we're like, damn, when was the last time I laughed?
- 31:11SPEAKER_01: Where's where's my joy?
- 31:13SPEAKER_01: Where's my laughter?
- 31:14SPEAKER_01: And so you're gonna let go your joy because you because you leak.
- 31:18SPEAKER_01: Let me please teach you how to laugh without leaking.
- 31:22SPEAKER_01: Because there's a way.
- 31:23SPEAKER_01: There's a way, and there's a way to cultivate that joy, there's a way to connect with that with that deep, sacred sexuality that is you, because it never goes away.
- 31:35SPEAKER_01: You will always have that energy.
- 31:37SPEAKER_01: Yes, your libido will drop, yes, your estrogen will plummet.
- 31:41SPEAKER_01: That is just something we all go through, and it's a beautiful thing because we're alive and we are women and we're freaking awesome.
- 31:48SPEAKER_01: But we will definitely go through some changes, and there are things that we can do to manage those changes and make them as fantastic of changes as they can be.
- 32:02SPEAKER_01: Cultivate your sexuality, cultivate your joy, cultivate your stability.
- 32:07SPEAKER_01: But it takes some work, yeah.
- 32:09SPEAKER_01: It's easier than you think.
- 32:10SPEAKER_01: You can do it in real life.
- 32:12SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I love that because I think um many people may be thinking, well, I I don't have time for that.
- 32:21SPEAKER_00: I gotta do XYZ.
- 32:23SPEAKER_00: I'm very busy as it is.
- 32:24SPEAKER_00: We're really good at, you know, kind of procrastinating and saying, I'm gonna do that later.
- 32:29SPEAKER_00: That's gonna be later.
- 32:30SPEAKER_00: That's down on the list.
- 32:32SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm just gonna, you know, just deal with it.
- 32:36SPEAKER_00: Like you said, that poor woman who is, you know, not laughing.
- 32:40SPEAKER_00: So she wouldn't leak.
- 32:42SPEAKER_00: That's just, I can't even imagine.
- 32:44SPEAKER_00: Like that just I know would feel so restrictive in life and really just further emphasize that pain point.
- 32:53SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
- 32:54SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 32:54SPEAKER_01: And so again, so many of us feel isolated and depressed, frankly, when we start to disconnect from this area because this is our area of joy.
- 33:03SPEAKER_01: This is our area of emotion, this is our our area of shame and guilt and grief, our core, our pelvic floor.
- 33:10SPEAKER_01: This is a very intense, profound, beautiful space.
- 33:14SPEAKER_01: But we have to choose positivity instead of negativity.
- 33:18SPEAKER_01: We have to keep making these choices, otherwise, we're just sliding our way through life and it can be it can be pretty sucky.
- 33:27SPEAKER_01: But putting those priorities a little higher on your list and doing these things in real life, I'm here to tell you don't need any extra time to practice some of these things.
- 33:38SPEAKER_01: When you're standing at that kitchen counter peeling carrots, I have something you can practice.
- 33:43SPEAKER_01: When you're in the shower, maybe just even for two minutes, I have a number of things that you can practice.
- 33:49SPEAKER_01: When you're in the the the minivan doing the carpool, uh uh, there are things that you can practice.
- 33:55SPEAKER_01: When you're collapsed on the sofa in exhaustion, I have some things that you can practice.
- 34:00SPEAKER_01: It does not take any extra even thought or or or mind space.
- 34:08SPEAKER_01: It just takes you connecting with you and honoring your body and giving it what it needs.
- 34:16SPEAKER_01: Here's a statistic that might blow your mind.
- 34:19SPEAKER_01: Most women who recognize they have pelvic floor dysfunction and or they've been told they have pelvic floor dysfunction, take a guess how long they wait until they do something about it.
- 34:33SPEAKER_01: 10 years.
- 34:35SPEAKER_01: Well, probably a lot of them, but yeah, I've seen a statistic out there, they wait six years on average to do anything about it.
- 34:43SPEAKER_01: That's a long time.
- 34:44SPEAKER_00: That's a long time.
- 34:46SPEAKER_01: That's a long time of leakage, of feeling disconnected, of pain, right?
- 34:54SPEAKER_01: Of feeling like, okay, I don't really want to orgasm.
- 34:58SPEAKER_01: Okay, I don't really want to wear a bathing suit.
- 35:02SPEAKER_01: Okay, I don't really even want to look at myself nude.
- 35:06SPEAKER_01: These are things that we can practice, but we have to shift our mind into a kinder place, right?
- 35:15SPEAKER_01: Again, we've started this pattern of this self-image, this loathing, this shame.
- 35:24SPEAKER_01: We've started this way, way, way back when we were so young.
- 35:29SPEAKER_01: And it just sticks with us because that's what shame does.
- 35:32SPEAKER_01: But this is so important.
- 35:34SPEAKER_01: Having conversations like you're having here, Kelly, this is so important.
- 35:38SPEAKER_01: Podcasts like yours are so important because these conversations are vital for us to grow and to feel free and fabulous.
- 35:48SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 35:48SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
- 35:49SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you.
- 35:51SPEAKER_00: I think that's such a great point.
- 35:53SPEAKER_00: And this is such a nice, easy step for someone if they're really struggling.
- 35:59SPEAKER_00: Um, and they saw the the title of the episode and they said, hmm, there might be something for me there.
- 36:05SPEAKER_00: And now you're you're telling us these are things that we can start in our own home, in our current routine.
- 36:15SPEAKER_00: No major life changes have to happen, just a little tiny pivot to something different and to detaching from a lot of the shame and guilt that I think is also it's it's perpetuated in society, in the messages, in the media, you know, in the things that we're consuming.
- 36:34SPEAKER_00: So um consume the things that are feeding your soul.
- 36:37SPEAKER_00: Don't, don't continue.
- 36:40SPEAKER_00: I, you know, I mean, obviously I'd love you to listen in here, but choose the media and what's coming into your space that feeds you, that makes you feel good, that resonates with who you are, that makes you feel connected.
- 36:55SPEAKER_00: I think one of the best things I ever did was stop watching TV, stop watching news, stop reading news, stop clicking on negative posts on social media.
- 37:05SPEAKER_00: If you saw my social media feeds, I I tell people you'd laugh because like it's it's all, you know, people like yourself, Julie, and the things that you're celebrating and talking about.
- 37:16SPEAKER_00: It's uh funny animal videos.
- 37:19SPEAKER_00: Like I literally, that's the world needs more of that, Kelly.
- 37:24SPEAKER_00: The world needs more of that.
- 37:26SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 37:26SPEAKER_00: So I think this is such a a great time for you to just tell us some ways that people can connect with you.
- 37:34SPEAKER_00: We'll definitely have everything in the show notes.
- 37:36SPEAKER_00: And I know you have some cool things that are coming up.
- 37:38SPEAKER_00: So um I will edit those show notes as we go when Julie has different things to offer.
- 37:43SPEAKER_00: Because I think what's really resonating with me personally as somebody who's 47 and in perimenopause and feeling like, how the heck did I get to perimenopause?
- 37:54SPEAKER_00: And nobody knows anything.
- 37:55SPEAKER_00: And I'm not talking about like just talking to my girlfriends, I'm talking about talking to multiple physicians who are like, eh, you don't sleep.
- 38:03SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're gonna have night sweats.
- 38:04SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's totally normal.
- 38:06SPEAKER_00: I'm like, totally it's not normal, but do we have to be this way?
- 38:11SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I agree.
- 38:13SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
- 38:13SPEAKER_01: And you know what?
- 38:14SPEAKER_01: That that that that leads me to, and I'm just gonna drop this real quick.
- 38:19SPEAKER_01: Don't settle for the easy stuff, ladies.
- 38:21SPEAKER_01: Like you're walking into Target and you go down that aisle that has all the diapers and all the leak proof panties.
- 38:27SPEAKER_01: Oh, don't get me started.
- 38:30SPEAKER_01: That's the easy way.
- 38:31SPEAKER_01: But you know what?
- 38:33SPEAKER_01: If you're gonna start that, guess how much money we spend for the rest of our life?
- 38:37SPEAKER_01: If we're gonna go that route,$70,000 on average.
- 38:42SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, wow, we might spend on leak proof panties and then diapers.
- 38:47SPEAKER_01: I mean, look at look at the look at the aisle at Target or wherever you're shopping.
- 38:52SPEAKER_01: Look at the aisle that has all of this stuff for pelvic floor dysfunction.
- 38:56SPEAKER_01: When you're in that aisle, when you pass that aisle, remember me.
- 39:00SPEAKER_01: Julie Blanfin of Stretch Your Spirit, remember to do your practices.
- 39:05SPEAKER_01: You're gonna learn some things from me, and I want you to practice them in real life as you're walking through Target.
- 39:11SPEAKER_01: So you don't need the leakproof panties, so you don't need to be dealing with pain.
- 39:16SPEAKER_01: So you don't need to disconnect from your sexual activity with yourself andor your partner.
- 39:22SPEAKER_01: I'm not talking about just people who are partnered, I'm talking about with yourself too.
- 39:27SPEAKER_01: We want to cultivate that sexuality forever because it's always there, just waiting for you to connect.
- 39:33SPEAKER_01: So don't just go the easy route and walk down that aisle at Target.
- 39:37SPEAKER_01: Don't go the easy route and just do your Kegels a thousand times a day.
- 39:41SPEAKER_01: Kegel exercises were were were designed, were created in the 1940s.
- 39:46SPEAKER_01: We know better now.
- 39:47SPEAKER_01: Yeah, kegels are fine and good, but let me tell you what you should be practicing instead.
- 39:54SPEAKER_01: Okay, don't go the easy route because your body is not going to get as much as it can get.
- 40:00SPEAKER_01: And you want to you want your body to get as the best it can get because it's your body.
- 40:05SPEAKER_01: It's fabulous.
- 40:06SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I mean, uh, looking at you, Julie, you're obviously living a very healthy, vibrant life.
- 40:12SPEAKER_00: You can just tell by the light in your face.
- 40:15SPEAKER_00: You know, you you have brought us so much potential for exceptional joy in our lives.
- 40:22SPEAKER_00: So I really encourage you all to connect with Julie, to find her.
- 40:27SPEAKER_00: We'll link everything in the show notes.
- 40:28SPEAKER_00: And if you need the fix immediately, uh, you can head over to Amazon, find Hot Mess to Hot Mom, available on Kindle if you want to start reading today, or if you've got your Amazon Prime like me, you can get your book really quick.
- 40:44SPEAKER_00: And bonus, there's 23 other authors in this terrific book.
- 40:49SPEAKER_00: So great for new moms, great for older moms, great for women who are just needing some tools to really enhance their lives in many different ways.
- 41:00SPEAKER_00: So I am so grateful for you, Julie.
- 41:03SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
- 41:03SPEAKER_00: I will absolutely be checking out all of your options for some strategies for using in real life, um, especially as I go through the joys of perimenopause.
- 41:17SPEAKER_00: And you know what?
- 41:18SPEAKER_00: I think we need to spend more time celebrating these changes in our lives and you know, a little less doom and gloom around it because there are a lot of really beautiful things that happen for us and changes that can be embraced and um just change the the conversation to one of positivity around aging and women.
- 41:42SPEAKER_00: We seem to like really celebrate aging in men.
- 41:45SPEAKER_00: And it's like, oh, look at you know, Harrison Ford, who is a very handsome man, yes.
- 41:50SPEAKER_00: But we don't then turn it on to his female counterparts and say, wow, look how, look at how she's living her life, look at how great she's doing.
- 41:58SPEAKER_00: We we compare her to the beauty of her 20s or 30s.
- 42:03SPEAKER_00: Um, and hopefully we're living well beyond our 20s and 30s.
- 42:07SPEAKER_00: And we are, yeah.
- 42:08SPEAKER_00: We've got a long lives.
- 42:10SPEAKER_00: Right.
- 42:11SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yes, we really do.
- 42:13SPEAKER_00: All right, everybody, thank you for joining us today.
- 42:16SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Julie, for being here.
- 42:18SPEAKER_00: Um, I look forward to hearing more about what you're up to in the world.
- 42:23SPEAKER_00: Um, thanks for joining the Mystic Nerd Squad podcast.
- 42:26SPEAKER_00: As always, make sure you like, you save, you share, um, especially if you think this would be really meaningful for someone in your life.
- 42:36SPEAKER_00: All right.
- 42:36SPEAKER_00: Take care, everybody.
- 42:38SPEAKER_00: And remember, follow your curiosity.
- 42:40SPEAKER_00: You never know where it's gonna lead you.