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Not Everyone Deserves a Seat: Fickle Family & Friends · R.E.A.L. Talk for REAL L.Y.F.E.

• 0:00
  Welcome to Real Talk for Real Life.
• 0:03
  Realizing everyone is always learning and living your full experience.
• 0:10
  This is where we live out loud, on purpose and with purpose.
• 0:16
  I'm Coach C, your host, and this is Season 2, Episode 4, Fickle Family and Friends.
• 0:23
  Everyone can't sit at your table. Let me say this plain.
• 0:29
  Not everyone deserves a seat at your table.
• 0:33
  And just because they've been around doesn't mean they're meant to stay around.
• 0:38
  Now, child, let's talk about the fickle ones. You know the ones.
• 0:44
  Present when it's convenient.
• 0:46
  Supportive when it benefits them. Silent when you need them most.
• 0:51
  Loud when they have something to say about you. And here's the truth we don't always want to accept.
• 0:57
  Just because you call them friend or they share your last name does not mean
• 1:04
  you move forward with them. Let that settle.
• 1:08
  Because as mothers, we hear it all the time. It takes a village and it does.
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  But let's correct something.
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  Everybody is not assigned to your village.
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  Some people are visitors. Some are lessons. Some are just passing through.
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  And motherhood will expose that real quick.
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  Because when life gets real, when you're stretched,
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  when you're pouring into your children, you start to see clearly who shows up,
• 1:42
  who falls back, who claps, who competes, who supports,
• 1:48
  who secretly hope you stumble.
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  And it's not always who you thought. I've had friends become family and family
• 1:58
  act like foes, not out of bitterness, just out of life, living, learning.
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  Losing illusions.
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  Because the truth is, fickle people don't lack proximity.
• 2:14
  They lack consistency and we don't build lives or raise children on inconsistency.
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  Now, let's bring this home because a circle around you impacts the atmosphere
• 2:27
  your children grow up in.
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  Energy matters, conversations matter, character matters.
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  And if your village is filled with doubt, drama, disloyalty,
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  disrespect, then don't be surprised when that spills over.
• 2:46
  So what do we do? We stop forcing.
• 2:50
  We stop explaining. We stop overextending to keep people comfortable who don't show up correctly.
• 2:57
  Because let me say this real clear.
• 3:00
  We are not forcing relationships that don't flow with purpose.
• 3:05
  And we are definitely not seating people at tables they didn't help us feel.
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  Because who needs villains in a village?
• 3:14
  Not over here. We choose peace, alignment, loyalty, growth.
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  Even if that means the circle gets smaller.
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  Because smaller with substance will always beat bigger with confusion.
• 3:32
  Everybody can't go, and that's not rejection. That's protection.
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  Here's your fearless homework.
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  Number one, take a moment and evaluate your circle.
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  Ask yourself, who in my life is consistent, not just convenient?
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  Who adds to my peace and who quietly disrupts it?
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  Now, here's the hard part. Number two, identify one relationship where you've
• 4:04
  been forcing connection.
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  And this week, pull back, set a boundary, or shift access.
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  Because protecting your peace protects your children too.
• 4:17
  We're not cutting people off out of emotion. We're choosing alignment with intention.
• 4:23
  This is real talk where we're realizing everyone is always learning and living
• 4:31
  your full experience this is coach c i'll see you in the next one.