Latest / Where We Rise / 31 | "The Second Half of My Life" | From Survival to Peace

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31 | "The Second Half of My Life" | From Survival to Peace · Where We Rise

0:00
Khalila McCoy: Hi.
0:00
Khalila McCoy: Hi, how are you?
0:13
Khalila McCoy: I hope you're enjoying your day so far.
0:16
Khalila McCoy: Thank you for taking the time to be here.
0:18
Khalila McCoy: We just finished our back to school series, which I hope you enjoyed, but don't worry, we still have a lot of wonderful, heartfelt stories coming our way.
0:27
Khalila McCoy: Today, I'm talking with Kristell Miles, a woman whose story is layered, complex, and leaves you wanting to know more.
0:35
Khalila McCoy: Many people first heard her name through BET's American Gangsters Trap Queen series, where her life was portrayed during the season of survival that led her to become known as one of the prominent figures in the Florida drug trade.
0:50
Khalila McCoy: Because of the legal and contractual boundaries around that BET special, I couldn't revisit those specific moments, but what we could talk about was everything that shaped the woman behind that story.
1:01
Khalila McCoy: The years she spent in survival mode, the business that she built while living as a fugitive, the moment her body collapsed when she was finally safe, and the healing journey that began once her name was finally cleared.
1:16
Khalila McCoy: I want you to really lean in and listen to what Kristelle shares today.
1:22
Khalila McCoy: I recognize that you might not know her whole story, and I encourage you to go explore it.
1:27
Khalila McCoy: But there will be times in life when we are listening to someone without knowing all the details that got them to where they are now.
1:34
Khalila McCoy: And that's okay, because sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is simply hold space, to listen without judgment, to learn without needing every chapter, and to honor the courage it takes for someone to speak their truth out loud.
1:48
Khalila McCoy: This conversation is honest.
1:51
Khalila McCoy: It's heavy at times, it's emotional, but it's full of moments that will make you pause and reflect.
1:57
Khalila McCoy: I really enjoyed learning about the strength Kristell found in the middle of chaos, the peace she's billing now, and the purpose she's stepping into as she rebuilds her life with intention, faith, and a whole lot of courage.
2:10
Khalila McCoy: If you've ever lived through something that changed you, if you've ever had to survive more than people knew about, if you've ever wondered what healing looks like on the other side, this episode is for you.
2:23
Khalila McCoy: Hi, Kristell.
2:25
Khalila McCoy: How are you today?
2:26
Khalila McCoy: Blessed and highly favored.
2:28
Khalila McCoy: How are you?
2:29
Khalila McCoy: I love that.
2:30
Khalila McCoy: I'm the same as well.
2:32
Khalila McCoy: So thank you for being on the show today.
2:34
Khalila McCoy: I really appreciate you taking your time to talk with me and share your story.
2:39
Khalila McCoy: Before you share your story, I do want you to kind of set the tone for us and just explain why you have decided that you want to tell your story.
2:48
Khalila McCoy: I know you've been through a lot of things.
2:50
Khalila McCoy: A lot of it could be really personal.
2:52
Khalila McCoy: A lot of it could cause people to judge you, point fingers at you, but you've decided I'm still gonna tell this.
2:58
Khalila McCoy: So why do you want the world to know about your story?
3:03
Kristell Miles: Well, I what was important to me to share this story is because I didn't know enough people that shared the similar situation.
3:11
Kristell Miles: And I knew that there had to be a lot of other people out there who shared similar situations to me.
3:17
Kristell Miles: And I wanted people to know that it was possible for you to see the other side.
3:22
Kristell Miles: And not more so for myself, but more so for my children.
3:25
Kristell Miles: Um, unfortunately, I was unable to be actively involved in my children's life, and I didn't want something to happen to me, and they never knew my side of the story.
3:35
Kristell Miles: They always heard it from somebody else's mouth, they always heard it from somebody else's, somebody else's viewpoint.
3:41
Kristell Miles: And I wanted them to hear it from me firsthand.
3:44
Kristell Miles: Um, and in doing so, I knew that it would possibly help somebody else out of their own struggle.
3:51
Khalila McCoy: Right.
3:51
Khalila McCoy: I love that.
3:52
Khalila McCoy: So thinking about what you're leaving for your children and then helping others in the world as well.
3:58
Khalila McCoy: So let's go ahead and dive into your story.
4:01
Khalila McCoy: Let's kind of take it way, way back to your childhood, growing up.
4:05
Khalila McCoy: What was that like for you?
4:08
Kristell Miles: Um, I think all throughout my life, it's just been survival mode.
4:12
Kristell Miles: Uh, that's what I've come into from childhood all the way up until today.
4:17
Kristell Miles: And that's just always been second nature to me.
4:19
Kristell Miles: Um, that's what I know.
4:23
Kristell Miles: That's where I feel safest.
4:24
Kristell Miles: That's just what I experienced from childhood up until today.
4:28
Kristell Miles: Unfortunately for me, um, it's what helped me.
4:33
Kristell Miles: What looks like survival for me looks like success to other people in a lot of instances.
4:39
Kristell Miles: So it did build me into the woman that I am today.
4:44
Kristell Miles: So I am grateful.
4:46
Khalila McCoy: Right.
4:46
Kristell Miles: Uh, but now I'm taking it a look at it from a different perspective, and I'm just trying to rewrite the second half of my life into a better one.
4:54
Khalila McCoy: Right.
4:54
Khalila McCoy: So as you look back into that, I like what you said.
4:57
Khalila McCoy: Survival looked like success to other people.
5:00
Khalila McCoy: How do you describe it?
5:02
Kristell Miles: Yeah, I but because it in the in the interim, I knew I know now that it's survival, but to me it was normal.
5:08
Kristell Miles: So I I can just I could just completely describe it as my normal.
5:14
Kristell Miles: You know, I it was always fast-paced, it was always chaotic, it was always something that looked like what other people looked as survival.
5:23
Kristell Miles: And I'm learning that now because I'm in therapy, because I'm learning what emotions look like, I'm learning what tolerance looks like, I'm learning what different things that other people seem as second nature, these are things that I'm learning are different for me.
5:35
Kristell Miles: And I I know now because of the education that I've taken responsibility to have.
5:42
Khalila McCoy: Right.
5:43
Kristell Miles: And it's not because of something that I was forced on.
5:45
Kristell Miles: It was just something that I I felt that I needed to do.
5:47
Kristell Miles: I needed to understand because I know now that there was something different in me that just didn't exist in other people.
5:52
Khalila McCoy: Mm-hmm.
5:53
Khalila McCoy: Now, in that survival, you were able to find certain strengths, right, that you are still using today.
6:00
Khalila McCoy: What did that look like for you at that time?
6:04
Kristell Miles: For me, my grandmother used to say to me all the time, I can't look at people to think about things the same way that I do.
6:10
Kristell Miles: And that was always for me the biggest challenge because I just always had a high expectation for myself and for other people.
6:18
Kristell Miles: I always expect for people to to to do be kind.
6:22
Kristell Miles: I always expect for people to do to think of the best of other people or to do the best by other people.
6:29
Kristell Miles: I always expect for people to want what's best for you.
6:32
Kristell Miles: Um, and even though my actions may not always appear that way to other people, it was the best that I can do with what was given to me.
6:40
Kristell Miles: So, and that's the reason why I say for other people it may look like a success story, but for for me, it was just me trying to survive and do what I could do what was best with what alternatives and what options was available to me.
6:53
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
6:53
Khalila McCoy: So what was life like when you were surviving?
6:57
Khalila McCoy: Life was challenging.
7:01
Kristell Miles: And it was uh it is very it was very lonely.
7:04
Kristell Miles: Because there's never it was up until recently when I started participating in therapy, I don't have somebody to vulnerably express feelings to without judgment.
7:16
Kristell Miles: Right.
7:17
Kristell Miles: There's things that I've experienced that I never have been able to unpack until up until recently.
7:23
Kristell Miles: Um so every day when something happened, I always just compartmentalized it and tucked it away into a space within my mind and kept moving.
7:34
Kristell Miles: Uh, where other people may have the freedom and the liberties to emotionally break down or stagnate themselves or say, Oh my gosh, this happened now, what am I going to do?
7:44
Kristell Miles: I didn't have the liberty to do those things.
7:46
Kristell Miles: I didn't have the liberty to do that.
7:47
Kristell Miles: I had to continue to keep moving, keep going, because there was always somebody depending on me to survive.
7:54
Kristell Miles: So I had no time to relax.
7:59
Kristell Miles: I had no time to get sick.
8:01
Kristell Miles: I didn't have any time to fail.
8:02
Kristell Miles: I didn't have any time to not do good.
8:07
Khalila McCoy: Right.
8:08
Kristell Miles: Because if I didn't do good, somebody else was not gonna survive.
8:14
Khalila McCoy: When you got to that point of understanding that about yourself and you're in the safe space now, right?
8:20
Khalila McCoy: How did that feel?
8:22
Khalila McCoy: Like the weight of realizing everything you went through.
8:25
Khalila McCoy: Did you kind of have like almost like a mental breakdown?
8:29
Khalila McCoy: Did you cry?
8:30
Khalila McCoy: Was it just like, oh, this is making sense now?
8:35
Kristell Miles: No, I I I physically didn't, but my body did.
8:38
Kristell Miles: Okay.
8:39
Kristell Miles: And that's when I was diagnosed with IIH.
8:42
Kristell Miles: I literally woke up blind.
8:45
Kristell Miles: Um, because I my body finally realized I was safe, that I was no longer on the run.
8:54
Kristell Miles: I can no longer nobody was depending on me.
8:57
Kristell Miles: I was finally free.
8:59
Kristell Miles: Everything, everything that I had been running from, everything that I had been that had been torturing me silently was gone.
9:08
Kristell Miles: So it was at that moment my body was finally just fully re- fully relaxed enough to say, okay, now it's time for you to fix me.
9:18
Kristell Miles: Right.
9:19
Kristell Miles: And my eyesight went, my my body's organs started to shut down.
9:24
Kristell Miles: Um, my body thought I had a brain tumor.
9:27
Kristell Miles: And in the interim, my brain cavity started to overflow with fluid, and my orders started to shut down one by one.
9:34
Kristell Miles: And the first thing to go was my vision.
9:36
Kristell Miles: So I spent all of 2024 in and out of the hospital.
9:40
Kristell Miles: I had a total of 11 um what do you call it?
9:49
Kristell Miles: Um sometimes I lose my words.
9:54
Kristell Miles: It's I had to get spinal taps within that year.
9:59
Khalila McCoy: Eleven.
9:59
Khalila McCoy: Oh my goodness.
10:01
Kristell Miles: Yes, so and it forced me July of 2025.
10:05
Kristell Miles: I had to have a brain shunk placed in my brain to keep up with how much fluid my body creates.
10:12
Khalila McCoy: Right.
10:13
Kristell Miles: So it has really been a complete life-altering thing.
10:18
Khalila McCoy: Right.
10:18
Kristell Miles: To where my my body finally said, Okay, we understand assignment now that everything is finally over.
10:25
Kristell Miles: It's time for you to stop tending to everybody else, and you have to tend to you.
10:28
Kristell Miles: Um and it it was it was it it actually shined a light on everything.
10:37
Kristell Miles: It made me pay attention to how many people were around me that were taking advantage of me.
10:41
Kristell Miles: Um, it brought it just made me take attendance of my life.
10:46
Kristell Miles: Right.
10:47
Kristell Miles: And it it it was completely enlightening.
10:50
Kristell Miles: Um, it forced me to sit down and realize that I need to take advantage of downtime, which is something that I never did.
10:58
Kristell Miles: I always worked 24-7.
11:00
Kristell Miles: I always focused on monetary gain as opposed to lifestyle.
11:07
Kristell Miles: Um I didn't focus very much on family or even building family, which is now something that I focus on a lot more.
11:16
Kristell Miles: Um activism is something I focus on a lot more now because I I I had to take attendance, I had to really realize what I was sacrificing and who was around for the right reasons.
11:31
Khalila McCoy: Right.
11:32
Kristell Miles: So yeah.
11:33
Kristell Miles: I lost a lot, but I gained a lot.
11:35
Khalila McCoy: Yeah, definitely.
11:37
Khalila McCoy: As you're taking stock of all that and thinking about making those switches in your life, since you had not been living that lifestyle, was it hard for you to figure out what your next step would be?
11:48
Khalila McCoy: Absolutely.
11:51
Kristell Miles: It was it was that was the hardest thing I have ever experienced in my entire life.
11:56
Kristell Miles: I um I can say that 100%.
11:58
Kristell Miles: It I'm still processing the whole thing of it all.
12:04
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
12:04
Kristell Miles: Um, but I can say right now, today, and this very moment, I'm probably the happiest I've ever been in all of my life.
12:13
Kristell Miles: This is a peace that I've felt that I've never felt um more so than anything I yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:26
Khalila McCoy: So talk a little bit about that peace that you now have.
12:30
Khalila McCoy: So before you talked about, you know, that survival mode, and I know that when you're in survival mode, like you said, it feels like normal.
12:38
Khalila McCoy: So coming out of that, now that you're in this peaceful place, what do you do differently?
12:47
Kristell Miles: I say no.
12:48
Kristell Miles: I say no to I say no to sacrificing my my own self.
12:56
Kristell Miles: Right.
12:57
Kristell Miles: Because a lot what people don't realize of people thought for a long time that I was very selfish because I'm always by myself.
13:03
Kristell Miles: What people don't realize is that I sacrificed myself a lot for other people.
13:07
Kristell Miles: People don't realize how many how much I gave up for other people.
13:13
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
13:13
Kristell Miles: I never chose the streets or to do what I did just for my betterment.
13:19
Kristell Miles: I chose that life because I felt like it was to to be better for everybody else.
13:24
Kristell Miles: You know, I didn't go to college because I wanted to go to college.
13:27
Kristell Miles: I could went to college because my mother wanted me to go to college.
13:29
Kristell Miles: I wanted to do hair from when I was a little girl, you know.
13:33
Kristell Miles: If I would have made the choices that I wanted to make for my life, I think that the trajectory of my life would have been totally different.
13:39
Khalila McCoy: Right.
13:39
Kristell Miles: Um, but the the the path that I took was all the decisions I made was to make somebody else happy.
13:46
Kristell Miles: And and in the end, I'm I'm proud of myself, yes.
13:53
Kristell Miles: But I think that now that I understand I I have I have a full understanding of what peace feels like and you can't outside sources, you can't look for happiness in somebody else.
14:08
Kristell Miles: You have to look at yourself first, you have to be the one to make yourself happy.
14:11
Kristell Miles: And a lot of times people look for outside sources, they look for other people, they look for you know and I remember somebody saying you can't be the um you can't be the hero in your own story, and I think you can.
14:25
Kristell Miles: You absolutely can.
14:27
Kristell Miles: You should be the hero on your own story.
14:29
Kristell Miles: And if you can't be the hero on your own story, then you need to self-reflect because if you're looking for somebody else to be your hero, you're gonna fall short every time because somebody else is always gonna let you down.
14:40
Kristell Miles: You can't teach somebody else how to love you if you don't know how to love yourself.
14:44
Kristell Miles: So, and I that that everything is a reflection of what you're putting out there.
14:49
Kristell Miles: And if you're putting out there low self-worth, the what you're gonna get back is low self-worth.
14:56
Khalila McCoy: Right.
14:56
Kristell Miles: So I practice every day high vibrations, I practice every day positivity, I tell myself every day how beautiful I am, and and I that's just reflected back at me with so much positively, so much love, so much affection comes from different places unwarranted because of how well I treat myself now.
15:16
Kristell Miles: Right.
15:16
Kristell Miles: And not to say I treated myself poorly before, but I always I sh I think that I put more weight in other people's happiness than I did on my own.
15:27
Kristell Miles: Right.
15:28
Kristell Miles: That makes sense.
15:29
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
15:30
Khalila McCoy: Now, how do you recommend, I would say, balancing that out for people?
15:35
Khalila McCoy: So again, we definitely want people to listen to your whole story on the BET and kind of hear everything that you went through.
15:42
Khalila McCoy: And I know a lot of the choices that you made, like you were trying to help your brothers, and you also talked about how your mom wanted you to go to college.
15:50
Khalila McCoy: Some things, right?
15:52
Khalila McCoy: It's not necessarily selfish to care for other people and help them in that way when you see that no one else is stepping up.
15:59
Khalila McCoy: And I think there's a lot of people out there who who struggle with, okay, what's the balance of if I don't do it, no one else will, but also protecting my peace.
16:09
Khalila McCoy: What would you say to them?
16:13
Kristell Miles: I just I I you have to remember that you cannot pour from an empty cup.
16:17
Kristell Miles: And you have to fill your cup up first and then pour out the extra.
16:22
Kristell Miles: And that was the problem, is that I will only fill my own cup up halfway and then pour into other people's cup and still be depleted and still keep going.
16:32
Kristell Miles: And that was the that was the problem, is I gave myself no balance.
16:35
Kristell Miles: And and I'm not saying that I want to be just completely selfish and not do for other people.
16:40
Kristell Miles: I opened up a nonprofit organization.
16:42
Kristell Miles: Right.
16:43
Khalila McCoy: You know what I'm saying?
16:44
Kristell Miles: I could still get out of the streets and feed the homeless.
16:47
Kristell Miles: People don't realize that, but I do, even while I'm still in the transition from finding myself a home, I'm still getting out every week and feeding the homeless out of my own pocket.
16:56
Kristell Miles: You know what I'm saying?
16:57
Kristell Miles: But the I'm what I'm saying that to say is that it's important for you to take that leisure time.
17:04
Kristell Miles: And a lot of times we we get so caught up in trying to make it to the next level that we forget that the next level comes with also taking that leisure time.
17:14
Kristell Miles: You have to take that time to build yourself up.
17:17
Kristell Miles: And I get some of the best ideas when I'm doing nothing, when I'm just focusing in and just spending time with God and just praising and worshiping and taking that 15 minutes in the morning to just do nothing.
17:31
Khalila McCoy: Right.
17:32
Kristell Miles: You know, and some people get so caught up in go, go, go, go, go.
17:36
Kristell Miles: And that's how I used to be that I would walk so fast that I would walk past $100 sitting on the ground.
17:42
Kristell Miles: And you, you know what I'm saying?
17:43
Kristell Miles: What I'm trying to say is if you slow down, you will be able to pick up them $100.
17:47
Kristell Miles: Right.
17:48
Kristell Miles: And that's what I'm trying to say.
17:49
Kristell Miles: You're not gonna get anywhere fast by go driving fast.
17:52
Kristell Miles: You need to just leave a little bit earlier.
17:54
Kristell Miles: Right.
17:55
Kristell Miles: It's all about it's all about paying attention to the being present.
18:00
Kristell Miles: And I think we're in a society right now where people are so focused on getting their fast and fast money.
18:05
Kristell Miles: And I know that because I was addicted to fast money.
18:09
Kristell Miles: And there's no nothing fast about it because just as fast as you get it, it's gonna leave just as fast.
18:14
Kristell Miles: So if you're focused on longevity, you want to have that life, you know, with peace in it.
18:20
Kristell Miles: You have to have that good balance of, you know, get that downtime, give yourself that peace, give yourself that that leisure.
18:28
Kristell Miles: I took the first vacation.
18:29
Kristell Miles: I'm 44 years old, and I took my first vacation in December.
18:32
Kristell Miles: Not to say I didn't pay for vacations, I paid for many vacations, but I never went.
18:37
Kristell Miles: Okay.
18:37
Kristell Miles: So I this my first vacation was in December.
18:41
Kristell Miles: And I I felt so rejuvenated.
18:43
Kristell Miles: I felt so at peace when I came back.
18:45
Kristell Miles: I was ready to go.
18:46
Kristell Miles: I was so ready to dive in.
18:49
Kristell Miles: I had so many ideas, so many, so much stuff, so many seeds were planted in me that I was ready to go to a whole nother level within myself that I don't think I would have been able to do if I would have kept my mind focused on work.
19:00
Kristell Miles: And that's what I was trying to say about being selfish is that you have to be so selfish with yourself that you say, you know what, self, I know that you need the extra hundred dollars for rent tomorrow, but you're tired.
19:11
Kristell Miles: So lay down.
19:12
Kristell Miles: You know what I'm saying?
19:13
Kristell Miles: And that's that's just about being wealth talk.
19:16
Kristell Miles: Wealth talk is knowing that you have to you have your limits.
19:19
Kristell Miles: Listen to your body because you don't have any type of wealth if your health is not at top tier, you know?
19:24
Kristell Miles: Right.
19:25
Kristell Miles: Do the right thing about yourself because the longevity is is everything.
19:29
Kristell Miles: You can't, you can you you can't nobody can prepare for because I wasn't prepared.
19:33
Kristell Miles: I wasn't prepared.
19:34
Kristell Miles: I had I had six months worth of build bill money put up.
19:37
Kristell Miles: I had everything set in place, I thought, but nobody's prepared for a chronic illness.
19:43
Kristell Miles: Nobody's prepared for your body to shut down on you.
19:45
Kristell Miles: Nobody knows.
19:46
Kristell Miles: You never you're never gonna think that that's gonna happen to you.
19:49
Kristell Miles: And it happened to me, right?
19:50
Kristell Miles: And you can't say because I'm an unhealthy person or I be out partying, I don't do drugs, I smoke weed.
19:57
Kristell Miles: That is as far far as it goes.
19:58
Kristell Miles: I don't drink alcohol.
20:00
Kristell Miles: So you can't say because I party all the time, I don't go to clubs.
20:04
Kristell Miles: I was a fugitive on the run, so it wasn't because I was in the streets, you know, I was in the house all the time.
20:10
Kristell Miles: So yeah, yeah.
20:14
Khalila McCoy: I'm sure you have an added level of stress too, built in.
20:18
Khalila McCoy: Because, like you said, you're on the run, you're not taking that time for yourself, and so your body is reacting in a way that's like, I we can't handle all of this.
20:27
Khalila McCoy: Yeah, yeah.
20:28
Kristell Miles: And that all of that added stress on top of stress, it built up for years.
20:33
Kristell Miles: It years it was just pressure.
20:35
Kristell Miles: And then when I finally got a chance to settle down, it was like, okay, right.
20:44
Khalila McCoy: So, what do you say to the person who hears this now, right?
20:48
Khalila McCoy: And it's like, okay, well, you went through this, so you know, hindsight's always 2020.
20:53
Khalila McCoy: In the moment living, do you feel like the younger you would have listened to someone saying this to them?
21:01
Kristell Miles: Honestly, I now when I think about it, looking back, there was nobody around who who would take time to talk to me.
21:10
Kristell Miles: And that's that's just the difference, is there wasn't anybody around to sit down and talk to me like that.
21:17
Kristell Miles: And everybody always says that to me.
21:19
Kristell Miles: If somebody talked to you, there there wasn't somebody around to say, Christelle, why don't we try this?
21:24
Kristell Miles: And because when somebody did do that, I I tried that.
21:28
Kristell Miles: Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
21:30
Kristell Miles: Because when I met when I met Derek, he said that to me, and I tried something different, and I excelled at it.
21:37
Kristell Miles: So it's not as if I would not have listened.
21:41
Kristell Miles: It's just that the opportunity didn't present itself until it at the right time, you know.
21:46
Kristell Miles: And I just think that everybody God has his has the right time.
21:50
Kristell Miles: You just have to listen and be be ready when it happens.
21:53
Khalila McCoy: Yes.
21:54
Kristell Miles: Because God is gonna present it to you.
21:55
Kristell Miles: You just gotta be be in the right moment, right?
21:58
Kristell Miles: And I think that that's Happens for everybody in everybody's life, and everybody just uh we sometimes people just not present and they don't jump at the opportunity when it presents itself.
22:08
Kristell Miles: I'm just grateful that I jumped at the opportunity when it presents itself, and everybody's putting your life for a season or a reason.
22:16
Kristell Miles: And I, you know, even though Derek and I are no longer together, I'm grateful that God put him in my life for that reason.
22:23
Kristell Miles: You know what I'm saying?
22:25
Kristell Miles: He's a good person for somebody else.
22:27
Kristell Miles: He's just not the right person for me.
22:29
Kristell Miles: But at that moment, he was perfect because he turned my life in in the right direction to push me in the direction that I needed to go.
22:38
Kristell Miles: Because that direction, the direction that I went, it put me on the right path.
22:43
Kristell Miles: Because I always wanted to do hair.
22:45
Kristell Miles: This is something I've always been naturally good at.
22:47
Kristell Miles: I've always been that was always my focus since I was a little girl.
22:51
Kristell Miles: So for me to be given the opportunity to turn around and do it again, life comes full circle.
22:56
Kristell Miles: And and now for me to be able to do that again and then turn it into an opportunity for me to do something with my nonprofit, you know, to help people that's coming back into society.
23:06
Kristell Miles: Also, my brother was a veteran to combine those two together.
23:10
Kristell Miles: I mean, God is just so good that he puts things in perspective and gives you an opportunity to everything that happened to me put me right where I need to be at this very moment.
23:21
Kristell Miles: So I you have to, you have to be mindful of that.
23:24
Kristell Miles: I don't think that nothing happens by coincidence.
23:27
Kristell Miles: Everything happened that way that exactly that it needed to happen.
23:30
Kristell Miles: So I'm grateful for the for the every up and every down because it put me right where I needed to be.
23:35
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
23:36
Khalila McCoy: Let's talk about where you are now.
23:38
Khalila McCoy: Let's talk a little bit about hair.
23:39
Khalila McCoy: As you can see, my my roots are growing out.
23:42
Khalila McCoy: I was thinking that when I was thinking of, I was like, oh man, I'm about to get on with the hair queen.
23:47
Khalila McCoy: And I got my hair looking like I'm my roots is bad too.
23:52
Khalila McCoy: I need to get you see my bullet trying to trying to hide it.
23:55
Khalila McCoy: See your bun looks good.
23:57
Khalila McCoy: I'm just like, whatever.
23:58
Khalila McCoy: I'm thinking it out next weekend.
24:00
Khalila McCoy: So I've just kind of given up for the week, but let's talk about your hair company, which is really cool.
24:09
Khalila McCoy: Tell us about how that all got started.
24:11
Khalila McCoy: And like you said, that's been your passion.
24:13
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
24:14
Kristell Miles: Well, my products, my hair company is K Goody Collection, uh, K Double K, K Goody Collection, and that started back in 2020, 2018.
24:23
Kristell Miles: Um, I've been doing hair since then.
24:24
Kristell Miles: And I honestly, it was just, it was just my way out.
24:28
Kristell Miles: It was my survival mode.
24:30
Kristell Miles: And I did not expect to to to go viral.
24:33
Kristell Miles: I just was trying to get extra clients.
24:35
Kristell Miles: I didn't know anything about social media.
24:39
Kristell Miles: I didn't even show myself on social media.
24:42
Kristell Miles: I just was talking crap to people like flip off your ex-stylist and tell her.
24:47
Kristell Miles: Because I could braid really fast.
24:52
Kristell Miles: So I used to talk smack and and my content just started going viral out of nowhere.
24:56
Kristell Miles: My my views went up, went crazy.
24:59
Kristell Miles: It was, it was amazing to me.
25:01
Kristell Miles: And and I was, you know, you got to keep in mind, I was on the run.
25:04
Kristell Miles: So of course I didn't show myself.
25:05
Kristell Miles: Right.
25:06
Kristell Miles: But bookings went crazy and it was it was amazing.
25:09
Kristell Miles: I shot off from there.
25:10
Kristell Miles: Um, and and what's crazy is at that time in 2018, I got on a coaching call with Coach Stormy, Stormy Daniels.
25:19
Kristell Miles: Yeah, wow.
25:20
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
25:21
Kristell Miles: And she is an amazing woman when it comes to business, she has an amazing mind.
25:25
Kristell Miles: And I I don't know if she remembers me, but I do remember her because she got on a coaching call with me and she told me, she said, You're leaving a lot of money on the table.
25:32
Kristell Miles: You need to come up with a product line.
25:34
Kristell Miles: And I was like, Well, I usually just tell my clients the ingredients that they need, and I have them mix it up so they can put it on their own hair.
25:41
Kristell Miles: And she was like, Girl, you need to do it yourself.
25:43
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
25:44
Kristell Miles: So yeah.
25:45
Kristell Miles: And so I um I went to the lab and I went down a rabbit hole and I just started studying because I do have ADHD.
25:53
Kristell Miles: Um so when I get into something, I'll start going down a rabbit hole and I just keep going.
25:59
Kristell Miles: It's it's crazy.
26:01
Kristell Miles: So I came up with a product line, and when I first started, I had seven products, which was crazy to me out of nowhere.
26:10
Kristell Miles: Um, and I ended up scaling down to just the three, which is the oil, um, the pre-poo, and the shampoo.
26:18
Kristell Miles: Uh, because those were the ones that really just took to everyone.
26:21
Kristell Miles: And my quench and oil is my hero product, and my hair is waistline five years later.
26:29
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
26:30
Kristell Miles: Um, so yeah, so it's really one of my hero products, and it got so much attention that I was able to become the first handcrafted product to be sold on Walmart.com.
26:40
Kristell Miles: I was the first handcrafted product to help cultivate the handcrafted section in Amazon.com.
26:47
Kristell Miles: So, um, especially when we went into the pandemic, I was working directly with the people to help cultivate the, you know, the when I did the PR product.
26:59
Kristell Miles: Yeah, no, no, they created the black community section, if you will.
27:05
Kristell Miles: Yes.
27:06
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
27:06
Kristell Miles: Trying to say it in the most, you know, politically correct way.
27:11
Kristell Miles: Yeah, P way.
27:13
Khalila McCoy: Yes.
27:16
Kristell Miles: But I worked with them on that there.
27:18
Kristell Miles: So um, yeah, it just put me in a opened up a lot of doors for me.
27:22
Kristell Miles: And um, I'm so grateful for that.
27:25
Kristell Miles: And it me selling the products, open up the doors with with even with me getting into open up arenas for me to get featured, uh, NBC, CDS, different newspapers.
27:37
Kristell Miles: I mean, everywhere just was interviewing me here, there, everywhere.
27:41
Kristell Miles: I was ending up on all these things, and I'm a fugitive.
27:45
Khalila McCoy: Right.
27:46
Khalila McCoy: It was crazy.
27:47
Khalila McCoy: It was crazy.
27:48
Khalila McCoy: It was like, how am I hiding on all these news?
27:50
Khalila McCoy: So are they looking for you at all?
27:54
Kristell Miles: Yeah, what's crazy is the first I did a pitch deck for um my business.
27:59
Kristell Miles: I did a because I first opened the business, I started a business, I took this uh cohort class.
28:05
Kristell Miles: Um, and mind you, I'm not even supposed to be in the class because it's for Ocala.
28:08
Kristell Miles: And I live in Orlando.
28:10
Kristell Miles: I was driving out there with no license once a week for this class, but I really wanted to have my own business.
28:18
Kristell Miles: And this is the first thing I ever put in my real name ever.
28:22
Kristell Miles: Ever.
28:22
Kristell Miles: You understand?
28:23
Kristell Miles: My name had never touched anything.
28:26
Kristell Miles: So um, everything had always been in somebody else's name.
28:29
Kristell Miles: But I had made it adamant and clear that since I was going to be on the run, I wanted to show the courts whenever they did catch me.
28:37
Kristell Miles: See, I'm doing good things right.
28:38
Kristell Miles: I'm not trying to, I wasn't trying to hide.
28:41
Kristell Miles: I'm right here.
28:43
Kristell Miles: So um I opened the business.
28:46
Kristell Miles: So therefore, they could could prove that I was sitting right here in within the state, state lines.
28:51
Kristell Miles: There's nothing to show that I left the state.
28:54
Kristell Miles: And I did the pitch deck, and the sheriff's department was in the audience, and I didn't know this.
29:03
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
29:04
Kristell Miles: I won the pitch deck.
29:06
Kristell Miles: I won a check for $5,000.
29:09
Kristell Miles: I had to cash the check because I did not have an ID.
29:14
Kristell Miles: So who walked me into the bank to cash the check?
29:18
Kristell Miles: The sheriff.
29:19
Kristell Miles: The sheriff, oh my goodness, walked me right up to the bank counter and said, Can you cash this check for her?
29:30
Khalila McCoy: I'm sitting there like deep breath.
29:34
Khalila McCoy: Remain calm.
29:37
Khalila McCoy: I just walked out of it.
29:39
Khalila McCoy: I said, Thank you, sir.
29:41
Khalila McCoy: It's my dull.
29:44
Khalila McCoy: And got to the car.
29:46
Khalila McCoy: I called Derek from the car.
29:48
Khalila McCoy: I was like, Derek, you're not gonna believe this.
29:52
Khalila McCoy: It was crazy.
29:54
Khalila McCoy: It was that's what I knew.
29:55
Khalila McCoy: I said it was meant to be.
29:56
Khalila McCoy: Nobody could take this from me.
29:58
Khalila McCoy: No.
30:01
Kristell Miles: Yeah, so down the line, I I was uh at the when I got the company started, I started selling the products, and I'm I finally got my name cleared.
30:12
Kristell Miles: We're doing uh, what do you call it?
30:15
Kristell Miles: Uh I'm walking around doing sales, right?
30:19
Kristell Miles: Okay.
30:20
Kristell Miles: For the Florida Classic and the police, the sheriff's department.
30:24
Kristell Miles: He's like, Can you, you can you guys going across the street?
30:27
Kristell Miles: I was like, Yeah.
30:28
Kristell Miles: He's like, Can you buy me some chicken?
30:30
Kristell Miles: I was like, Yeah, I got you.
30:31
Kristell Miles: I went over there and bought all of them chicken.
30:34
Khalila McCoy: He was like, trying to give me their money back.
30:36
Khalila McCoy: I was like, nope, it's on me.
30:38
Khalila McCoy: Yeah, I gotta pay y'all back.
30:40
Khalila McCoy: I owe you right, yeah, it's crazy.
30:48
Khalila McCoy: But that's how you know I say all that to say is that what's for you is for you.
30:53
Kristell Miles: You can never, you can never stop what's for you.
30:55
Kristell Miles: And in spite of all of that, God still came through.
30:59
Khalila McCoy: Yes.
31:00
Khalila McCoy: Thinking about starting like a hair care business, are you just in there by yourself mixing up the things that you know?
31:08
Khalila McCoy: And then you get investors to kind of help you make it into a line.
31:12
Khalila McCoy: How does that work?
31:14
Kristell Miles: No, I did everything from scratch.
31:15
Kristell Miles: I did because you gotta keep in mind, I'm on the run.
31:18
Kristell Miles: I could not do that.
31:19
Kristell Miles: So other people probably could, or I can say I've taught classes to other people on how to start and launch a business.
31:28
Kristell Miles: And other people who I've taught how to do this, they have gone to investors and did all the I did everything from scratch.
31:35
Kristell Miles: I financed everything directly.
31:37
Kristell Miles: I bought all my own bottles, I bought bottle filling machines, I have all of that stuff.
31:42
Kristell Miles: I make everything in small batches myself.
31:45
Kristell Miles: Um, I did try to collaborate with other people, but it's unfair.
31:51
Kristell Miles: It's unfair how the industry is very um catty.
31:55
Kristell Miles: People don't like to collaborate when it comes to certain things.
31:58
Kristell Miles: Um but that's neither here nor there.
32:01
Kristell Miles: I did everything from scratch.
32:04
Kristell Miles: Um, I did get different offers to try to buy my formula and everything like that, but nothing.
32:09
Kristell Miles: I I did everything from scratch.
32:10
Kristell Miles: I didn't go to any scientist to put anything together.
32:15
Kristell Miles: I did the research, I sent my stuff to the lab to get tested.
32:19
Kristell Miles: It came back to get everything shelf clearance.
32:22
Kristell Miles: I paid for my UPC codes, my all of that stuff.
32:25
Kristell Miles: I did everything from the bottom to the top.
32:28
Kristell Miles: Um, because I didn't have any options.
32:30
Kristell Miles: And there was nobody for me to ask.
32:33
Kristell Miles: You know, I just had to Google everything, trial and error.
32:37
Kristell Miles: I I lost a lot of money trying to figure it out.
32:40
Kristell Miles: And that's what made me write the book.
32:42
Kristell Miles: I did, I do have um the blueprint to retail.
32:45
Kristell Miles: It is available on my website, kgoodedcollection.com, where it breaks everything down, how to do it from start to finish, from an idea phase all the way into putting it on the store shelves.
32:54
Kristell Miles: So that way nobody has to go through it a dummy way like I did.
32:57
Kristell Miles: So you can figure it out how to do it.
33:01
Kristell Miles: Um, so you can do it with a white label, or if you don't want to try to figure everything out on your own, or you could formulate it from scratch.
33:08
Kristell Miles: But I formulated all of my products from scratch because I didn't want to trust somebody else.
33:12
Kristell Miles: I wanted my formulations to be one and done.
33:15
Kristell Miles: There's nobody who has the same formula as me.
33:17
Kristell Miles: Um, so the only person who knows the recipe is me.
33:22
Kristell Miles: And it and nobody else is gonna get it until they put me in the dirt, and that'll be my daughter.
33:28
Khalila McCoy: So you still operate that way, even though your business has grown so much.
33:33
Kristell Miles: Yeah, absolutely.
33:34
Kristell Miles: Absolutely.
33:35
Kristell Miles: There's no, I don't see any reason to go any different until and well, I you know, and that's probably my business won't grow maybe because of that, but I'm okay with that.
33:46
Kristell Miles: It can, I'm okay with that.
33:48
Kristell Miles: I don't have any problem with it being small batches because I think that that keeps the quality of a certain standard.
33:54
Khalila McCoy: I see how the loyalty, your customers will be loyal because they know of that quality.
34:00
Kristell Miles: Yeah, and I still have people right now.
34:02
Kristell Miles: I have a lot of people that are angry because I have not made a batch.
34:05
Kristell Miles: Yeah, because literally I made it and it was like gone before the bottle got gone to Orlando.
34:14
Kristell Miles: I made a small batch and it was gone before I got it back to Orlando.
34:19
Kristell Miles: So I just I I there's people are waiting for cases right now.
34:22
Kristell Miles: I'm just waiting for me to get a uh because I you have to have a certain level of sanitation um in the area, and I'm just you know, in transit.
34:33
Kristell Miles: So I gotta wait till I get it into a sanitary environment for me to to make it because I won't I won't let the quality go down for me to make some money.
34:41
Kristell Miles: Money is secondary to me, quality is first, and that's even with hair.
34:45
Kristell Miles: If beauty is not first hand, you know, health is first, beauty is second.
34:49
Khalila McCoy: Right.
34:50
Khalila McCoy: That's really good.
34:52
Khalila McCoy: Now share a little bit about your nonprofit as well.
34:58
Kristell Miles: Yeah, well, I think that that was a mission that God set on my heart a long time ago, and he made it evident to me when I got ill.
35:05
Kristell Miles: And it's simply because there's uh what what it's called the Alice community, the people who stand within that gap.
35:12
Kristell Miles: We've that make too much money to qualify for low-income housing, but not enough money to sustain themselves if they hit a pitfall.
35:19
Kristell Miles: So, you know, like people that live paycheck to paycheck.
35:24
Khalila McCoy: Right.
35:24
Kristell Miles: So if you hit a hurdle, you get ill, you miss a paycheck, then you're at risk for losing it all.
35:30
Kristell Miles: And unfortunately, there's too many people that are are living in that environment and there's not any help or resources available to them.
35:38
Kristell Miles: Um, unfortunately, if you if you're not falling within the percentile of being uh an addict or, you know, like me, I don't have any small children, I don't have an addiction, I don't have, you know, I I don't fall in that gap of all of those the tears to need help.
35:59
Kristell Miles: There wasn't very much help available to me while I was ill and I was needing somebody to help me with just small things like my bills, so I didn't lose things.
36:07
Kristell Miles: And I just don't want other people to go through that.
36:10
Kristell Miles: I think that there should be something available to them.
36:12
Kristell Miles: And a large part of that community are people that are transitioning back into the community as well as veterans that are a large are in that community as well.
36:22
Kristell Miles: So I'm working on a transitional community, if you will.
36:26
Kristell Miles: Transitional housing, independent housing is the first step and helping people build that trust so that way prevention is huge, is huge because we don't want people to lose their homes or lose everything because of something happening.
36:42
Kristell Miles: And I think that it's important for three for us to have that.
36:45
Kristell Miles: So the nonprofit is KLZ Essentials Incorporated.
36:50
Kristell Miles: Just getting started here, so we should be up off the ground here in the next couple of months.
36:56
Kristell Miles: Yeah, we've already been we've I've already gotten everything going.
37:00
Kristell Miles: The website is up.
37:01
Kristell Miles: We're just waiting for an update.
37:03
Kristell Miles: A couple of few things to get done so we can get started here, but our first house should be opening here in the next couple of weeks.
37:10
Khalila McCoy: Nice, that's so exciting.
37:12
Khalila McCoy: Yeah, how many people will it house?
37:17
Kristell Miles: Um we're looking to each house to have two people per room at the most, independent housing.
37:22
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
37:23
Kristell Miles: So each house probably be able to house about six to eight people.
37:28
Khalila McCoy: Okay.
37:28
Khalila McCoy: And is it like an application process that they'll go through to be able to stay at the house?
37:34
Kristell Miles: Yes, absolutely.
37:35
Kristell Miles: Absolutely.
37:35
Kristell Miles: Yeah, absolutely.
37:37
Khalila McCoy: That's so great.
37:38
Khalila McCoy: I love how you're uh giving back to the community, looking out for other people.
37:42
Khalila McCoy: That just seems to be your personality, just to care for others.
37:46
Khalila McCoy: And like you said, you're still taking care of yourself, but you're seeing a need around you and you're filling that space for people.
37:54
Kristell Miles: Absolutely.
37:55
Kristell Miles: I I I gotta take care of myself first and then offer the overage to others.
38:01
Khalila McCoy: Yes.
38:01
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
38:02
Khalila McCoy: What do you do to help make sure your cup stays full?
38:07
Kristell Miles: Take that downtime.
38:08
Kristell Miles: I gotta take my rest.
38:10
Kristell Miles: I take I take at least one day a week.
38:12
Kristell Miles: As bad as it hurts my emotions.
38:15
Kristell Miles: One day a week, I do not work.
38:18
Kristell Miles: I do not do any type of work, nothing.
38:21
Khalila McCoy: So it's hard for you.
38:23
Kristell Miles: It is very hard for me.
38:24
Kristell Miles: Okay.
38:24
Kristell Miles: It is very hard for me.
38:25
Kristell Miles: Yes.
38:27
Khalila McCoy: What do you do in your downtime?
38:28
Khalila McCoy: Is it just like relaxing, watch TV?
38:30
Khalila McCoy: Do you go shopping?
38:31
Khalila McCoy: Do you like what do you do for yourself?
38:34
Khalila McCoy: I love shopping.
38:35
Kristell Miles: Yes, I do.
38:36
Kristell Miles: I love retail therapy.
38:38
Kristell Miles: Um, but I've been doing a lot of self-care, like nannies and petties, lashes and brows.
38:44
Kristell Miles: Um, I've been going to play bingo, concerts, and stuff like that.
38:50
Kristell Miles: I've been doing a lot of traveling too, a lot of trips and stuff like that.
38:54
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
38:55
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
38:55
Kristell Miles: I like that.
38:57
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
38:59
Kristell Miles: I can't complain.
39:00
Kristell Miles: God has just really been blessing me with overflow and abundance.
39:03
Kristell Miles: And, you know, I got some really good people in my circle who have been just, come on, girl, let's go, let's go, let's go.
39:09
Kristell Miles: So I'm going.
39:11
Kristell Miles: Right.
39:12
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
39:13
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
39:13
Kristell Miles: My kids are grown.
39:14
Kristell Miles: So I can I don't have nothing holding me back.
39:17
Khalila McCoy: Do you feel like as you're going through this journey, like with, you know, from where you were starting your business to this place of peace, have you seen your circle change a lot over the years?
39:29
Kristell Miles: Um, these last two years, my circle has changed tremendously, tremendously, tremendously.
39:35
Kristell Miles: Because I noticed a lot of people, a lot of people that were around me, they were not around me for the right reasons.
39:40
Khalila McCoy: Right.
39:41
Kristell Miles: And I I'm okay with that.
39:43
Kristell Miles: I'm just glad that God revealed them before this next elevation.
39:46
Khalila McCoy: Right.
39:47
Kristell Miles: Because this next elevation is gonna be very, very big, you know, and people are not going to, they're gonna wish they stayed around.
39:55
Kristell Miles: Right.
39:55
Kristell Miles: And then they can just walk him back in, right?
39:58
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
39:58
Kristell Miles: Oh no, no, no, no.
40:00
Kristell Miles: My boundaries are way different now.
40:02
Kristell Miles: Yeah, once I've had your funeral in my mind, it's over.
40:10
Kristell Miles: Yes, right.
40:11
Kristell Miles: Yeah.
40:13
Kristell Miles: I like that.
40:14
Khalila McCoy: I've never heard someone say that before.
40:15
Khalila McCoy: Your funeral in my mind.
40:17
Khalila McCoy: Girl, yeah.
40:18
Khalila McCoy: And you know, it's funny, it's because my my daughter, she's just like me.
40:22
Kristell Miles: Like we both have a graveyard in our phone.
40:30
Khalila McCoy: You guys aren't playing.
40:31
Khalila McCoy: You're like, nope, you're six feet under.
40:33
Khalila McCoy: Like, you're done.
40:35
Khalila McCoy: Have a whole like real life funeral in my mind and songs and everything.
40:42
Khalila McCoy: Um make a speech.
40:44
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
40:45
Khalila McCoy: If you try to call me, all I send you is a tombstone.
40:54
Khalila McCoy: Like I'm sorry, I'm talking to go.
40:57
Khalila McCoy: Tombstone.
41:01
Khalila McCoy: I'm sorry, tombstone.
41:03
Khalila McCoy: Like you said, you're protecting your piece.
41:06
Khalila McCoy: You know who's to help you.
41:08
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
41:09
Kristell Miles: Yeah, because a lot of times a personal person in their mind, they think that they got over, and because you don't know, but I'm very observant and I know things that you think I don't know.
41:19
Kristell Miles: Right.
41:20
Kristell Miles: Just because I didn't say something don't mean I don't know.
41:23
Khalila McCoy: Right.
41:23
Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
41:24
Khalila McCoy: So thinking about all of the things that you kind of shared today and like you're going through and you're still on your journey of growing and you know, looking for other ways to fill your life, what would you say to the people who are listening?
41:39
Khalila McCoy: What would you encourage them to do to continue to rise in their own lives?
41:43
Khalila McCoy: Um, be delusional.
41:47
Kristell Miles: Be delusional with your faith.
41:49
Kristell Miles: No dream is too big.
41:51
Kristell Miles: Do not dream small.
41:53
Kristell Miles: And if you go around people and they tell you that you are being dreaming too big, get them away from you.
41:59
Kristell Miles: Because if they don't believe in you, then they don't need to be around you.
42:03
Kristell Miles: Do not let their small minds determine your future.
42:08
Khalila McCoy: So, real quick, tell us about your BLT special.
42:12
Khalila McCoy: No, it's not BLT.
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Khalila McCoy: Is that hunger?
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Khalila McCoy: Yes, and dinner time girl.
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Khalila McCoy: Do you not know why I said that?
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Khalila McCoy: It's all right if you need to grab a little sandwich or solve.
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Khalila McCoy: Okay, let's try that again.
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Khalila McCoy: So if you can tell us about your B.E.T special, just a quick overview of what that was about and why someone might want to go watch that.
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Kristell Miles: Um, I think that the B.E.T special gives you a little bit more insight about who, what, where, and why I was on the run.
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Kristell Miles: Um the stuff that led to me being a fugitive and the stuff that the good gives you some of my goodies.
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Kristell Miles: Yeah.
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Kristell Miles: Yeah.
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Kristell Miles: It gives you some of the dirt, some of the insight.
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Kristell Miles: It's not all of it, but it's definitely a good uh good teaser.
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Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
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Kristell Miles: Yeah.
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Kristell Miles: And I think that it is definitely relatable for a lot of people.
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Kristell Miles: And that's what makes it a little bit different than the a lot of other special similar to mine, because it makes it a lot more relatable.
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Kristell Miles: Because if you had the choice similar, I think you would make the same choice I did.
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Khalila McCoy: Mm-hmm.
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Khalila McCoy: Yeah, I like I like that what you just said, as far as sometimes we think we know what we would do, or we think, oh, we can look at somebody and say, Oh no, I would never do that, right?
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Khalila McCoy: But when you truly understand the situation that that person is in, when you truly think about the walk of life that they're taking, you haven't been there.
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Khalila McCoy: So you don't know, right?
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Khalila McCoy: You can't say.
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Khalila McCoy: So I like the idea of truly listening to somebody else and thinking through what that person is actually going through.
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Khalila McCoy: So I have seen this special, so I won't give too much away.
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Khalila McCoy: I thought it was really good.
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Khalila McCoy: It was very interesting.
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Khalila McCoy: Um, you shared a lot of really good stuff.
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Khalila McCoy: And I think I said this earlier, but I'm very impressed with how vulnerable you are and how much you are willing to share so others can learn through you.
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Khalila McCoy: So I want to thank you for that.
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Khalila McCoy: And thank you for sharing your story so we can all grow as well.
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Khalila McCoy: Well, I thank you, thank you for using your platform to share my story as well.
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Khalila McCoy: Yeah, and like today, really like focusing on that next step.
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Khalila McCoy: What are you doing now?
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Khalila McCoy: What is going on?
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Khalila McCoy: Absolutely.
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Kristell Miles: Absolutely.
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Kristell Miles: A lot of times people get into the middle of a tussle and it's too easy to give up.
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Kristell Miles: You can't you can't, you can't, you gotta keep fighting.
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Kristell Miles: You gotta keep fighting.
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Khalila McCoy: Yeah.
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Khalila McCoy: Christelle shared a lot of powerful things with us today.
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Khalila McCoy: Again, if you'd like the details of what she went through, you can check out the BET special.
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Khalila McCoy: But I hope you didn't miss the key points she made here.
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Khalila McCoy: She talked about the value of finding peace in your life.
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Khalila McCoy: She described a peace she's never felt before, a happiness she didn't even know was possible.
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Khalila McCoy: After trials, trauma, and decisions that could have led her down a very different path, she has found a new way to look at life.
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Khalila McCoy: I also love that she talked about the importance of health over wealth.
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Khalila McCoy: She said, you don't have any kind of wealth if your health isn't at the top.
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Khalila McCoy: She learned that the hard way when her body shut down, when she woke up blind, when she realized that she had spent years pouring into everyone else while ignoring herself.
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Khalila McCoy: Her story reminds us that success means nothing if your body and your spirit are breaking under the weight of survival.
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Khalila McCoy: One of the moments that stayed with me the most was when I asked her if her younger self would have listened to the advice she is sharing now.
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Khalila McCoy: It broke my heart when she said there was no one around talking to her at all.
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Khalila McCoy: And if someone had been, she would have listened.
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Khalila McCoy: She didn't have a safe place to express her emotions without judgment.
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Khalila McCoy: She didn't have somebody to help her understand what she was feeling.
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Khalila McCoy: She said that after all these years, she's finally learning about emotions, tolerance, and life through therapy.
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Khalila McCoy: That made me think of you.
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Khalila McCoy: That made me think of my own life.
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Khalila McCoy: Not because I'm advocating for randomly jumping into somebody's business, but because there are so many times when we assume someone is acting out or shutting down or making destructive choices because they just don't care or because they're a quote, bad person.
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Khalila McCoy: But what if they never had someone in their corner?
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Khalila McCoy: What if they never had a voice of wisdom?
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Khalila McCoy: What if they felt the weight of judgment so strongly that they couldn't bring themselves to share anything at all?
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Khalila McCoy: I'm not excusing every action people take in those circumstances, but I am encouraging you to consider that person who might be lost, that person who might be caring more than you know, the person who might be waiting for one voice, one moment, one safe conversation to help them see a different path.
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Khalila McCoy: And I'm encouraging you, be the voice of wisdom, be that steady presence, be the person who offers direction without condemnation, guidance without shame, and compassion without writing someone off.
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Khalila McCoy: Christelle shows us that even when things get bad, even when life feels chaotic, lonely, or impossible, there is still a dream inside.
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Khalila McCoy: There is still a goal, there is still a future worth fighting for, and peace is still possible.
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Khalila McCoy: I want to thank you again, Christelle, for coming on the show.
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Khalila McCoy: I really appreciate it.
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Khalila McCoy: It was such a pleasure meeting you.
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Khalila McCoy: And thank you, friend, for listening today.
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Khalila McCoy: I hope this conversation encourages you to choose peace, protect your health, and show up for someone who might need your strength more than you know.
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Khalila McCoy: And as always, continue to listen and listen louder to yourself, to the people you love, and to the things that connect us in ways we sometimes forget to notice.
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Khalila McCoy: I'll meet you back here next time.
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Khalila McCoy: See you bye.