Latest / The Diva Details / Embracing Youth: The New Era of Women Dating Younger
Transcript
- 0:00Welcome to the Diva Details. Welcome to the Diva Details.
- 0:05Where bold, confident women embrace life unapologetically.
- 0:10From love and sex to wellness and reinvention. We keep it raw, real and powerful.
- 0:17No filters, no limits. Just fearless conversations to help you thrive.
- 0:23Let's dive in with Diva Mia and Diva Kat.
- 0:31Well hello diva Kat hello diva mia
- 0:34how are you today i'm great did you
- 0:37have a good weekend oh yes i was a good i love my weekend yeah good times huh
- 0:42yeah i live for summer i love summer summer's good yes yes so you know i wanted
- 0:48to talk a little bit about this thing that's been like kind of we mentioned
- 0:52a few times on the previous podcast about women dating younger,
- 0:58and you know i've made little kind
- 1:00of offhanded comments that maybe i need to go younger but there's been
- 1:04so many people that have talked to me about dating younger and why it's important
- 1:10to date someone that's younger so what do you think about that i'm all for it
- 1:14my husband did seven years younger than i am i know you married younger yeah
- 1:19and i met wonderful woman wealthy couple.
- 1:24Her husband also seven years younger than her. Really? Yes. Where'd you meet her?
- 1:29At the gym. At the gym? Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, I worked out with two years.
- 1:34I didn't know they were a couple. I worked out with them for the past seven
- 1:38years when the gym opened seven years ago by my house. Yeah.
- 1:41And they're a couple. Yeah. I think that dating younger is kind of interesting.
- 1:47And lately, it's been a lot of older women dating younger, not older men.
- 1:52My niece, they're about to get married. She's six years older than her fiancé. Really? Mm-hmm.
- 1:58Wow. Everybody seems to be going...
- 2:01And, you know, lately there's been a ton of movies. But you know what it is?
- 2:06Because us nowadays, as a woman, we take care of ourselves much better than the older days.
- 2:12You know what I think it is, actually? I think it's also related to money.
- 2:16Yeah. Because, no, because it used to be that the old rich guy would get divorced
- 2:22from his wife that was close in age, right?
- 2:24Right. Right around his 50s or 60s, and he would go and he would marry someone
- 2:29younger, right? Yes. And that's what they would do is it was their standard, you know, procedures.
- 2:35Oh, they went through their midlife crisis. Right.
- 2:39They ended up finding some young thing on the side and then they got divorced.
- 2:44And it was just a process and everybody would make fun and then they go buy their red convertible.
- 2:48Right. Right. So that was the thing. But lately, I think a lot of it has to
- 2:52do with the fact that women in our 40s and 50s and 60s, we have our own money.
- 2:57Well, the table is turning. The table is turned, and a professional woman in
- 3:03her 40s, 50s, and 60s, she wants to be happy, too.
- 3:06And maybe she—I don't think we were, you know, calling out men to get divorced.
- 3:11But there's been movies on it lately, that baby girl movie. Have you seen that?
- 3:16It's about a woman who cheats on her husband with a really young guy in his 20s.
- 3:21And she's in her 50s. Well, remember, that's a true story, that movie,
- 3:25How to Get Her Group Back. Yeah.
- 3:27How stellar—well, no, she wasn't cheating, though. But how Stella got her group
- 3:30back, she went with a much younger man.
- 3:32A much younger man. Like 15 years or 20 years. But that's based on a true story.
- 3:36Well, and then there's the family affair.
- 3:38There's the idea of you, which is somebody dating super younger.
- 3:43There's all these movies. Lately, Hollywood has taken notice.
- 3:48They are. And you mentioned Madonna and her boyfriend. I don't know if they're
- 3:51married. Cher and her boyfriend.
- 3:53But they're all younger as well. And, I mean, these are significant anywhere
- 3:57from 5 to 30 years younger or more.
- 4:01Yeah. But, you know, some people...
- 4:04We don't talk old. Remember we met Renee on the cruise? She said,
- 4:07we're not talking. Yeah, Renee dates younger, too.
- 4:10That's what I'm saying. She's 73, and she only dates. She'll date 20, 30 years longer.
- 4:14So, I mean, because she can.
- 4:17He's only 53 years old, and he is a two.
- 4:20Renee's boyfriend. Really? Yeah. Wow. I follow her. Wow, that's awesome.
- 4:27But you know what? It's energy. It's energy. It's energy.
- 4:31And it does matter how you look as well. but let's
- 4:34kind of like focus on you know i think a lot of it is that
- 4:37you know in our 50s and 60s we're freaking confident oh
- 4:40yeah we know what we want financial secure
- 4:44we're financially secure we know we want physically we know what we want sexually
- 4:47we know what we want in a partner yes and we're empowered and when we were younger
- 4:52i think a lot of women also settled because they just we were pushed into marriage
- 4:58a lot by our families not to say i mean it's true right that's There was society,
- 5:02oh, you need to get married or you're going to get too old to have babies. There was that push.
- 5:06Now we're in our 50s, 40, 50, 60s, and some of us, although you waited and you
- 5:11married younger anyway.
- 5:13Well, my mom was going to marry me off at 22. I fled the country.
- 5:17You did? Oh, yeah. I had to show you the guy that I was supposed to marry him.
- 5:22I'm so glad you did because you got an awesome man.
- 5:24No, I had to show you the guy that I was supposed to marry him because of family arranging and stuff.
- 5:31He looked like his grandpa with the belly up. Yeah, his belly bigger than, I don't know.
- 5:37He looked like he's carrying a nine-month-old baby.
- 5:39That's terrible. You know when you're pregnant right before you give birth?
- 5:42Yeah, that's terrible. I said, oh my God, thank God, thank Buddha,
- 5:45thanks everybody. Yeah.
- 5:46I'm glad I made my own decision. Wow. Yes. You know, I think in our 20s and
- 5:5230s, we're still exploring, we're still learning.
- 5:55Yeah, I mean, there is a lot of successful couples, you know.
- 5:58My parents are arranging marriage, but there is a lot, I have to say. But it's not for me.
- 6:04The energy does not match. I'm attached to younger energy.
- 6:09People still want to go do stuff, pick our bed, be spontaneous,
- 6:13let's drive to the beach. You're the one to call. Right. Yes.
- 6:17Well, I think in our 20s and 30s, we're more chaotic and we're focused on growing
- 6:23and passion and following our dreams and things like that.
- 6:26And whether we get married or not in our 20s
- 6:29and 30s some of us do some of us don't right but we're
- 6:33still it's different now in our 40s we
- 6:36might be rebuilding after divorce or in our
- 6:3950s rebuilding after divorce 40s 50s 60s and
- 6:43we're more intentional there is when we're
- 6:45dating i think we're looking for emotional intelligence and i
- 6:48don't think age matters as long as they're emotionally intelligent
- 6:51no it doesn't matter anymore and they have to be stable yes
- 6:55you know sometimes you date somebody in their 50s and
- 6:58they've gone through two or three divorces and they're kind of broken you
- 7:01don't want that and you don't want that so sometimes getting a guy
- 7:04in their 30s or 40s you know if
- 7:07you're in your 50s or 60s might be a fun thing yeah my
- 7:10niece my niece following my footsteps she dating
- 7:14him right after med school yeah now they're
- 7:17getting married and he's well he's six years younger six years
- 7:20younger well i think that in your 50s we're
- 7:23self-assured yeah i think so i think we're confident i
- 7:27think we're looking more for connection and values than.
- 7:30Necessarily age yes so it's interesting i might end up dating younger diva Kat
- 7:37and they might have to get me married off at a wedding you're my my maid of
- 7:40honor remember you know i'm all for it there is no stopping right now we go
- 7:47to bora bora for diva me a bachelor party.
- 7:50Oh, bachelorette. A bachelorette party. Bachelorette party.
- 7:54So I think you're right. I think it's energy and vitality. I think some people
- 7:58have it and some people don't.
- 8:01Younger men will often...
- 8:03They bring a perspective of spontaneity and youth that, I'm sorry to say,
- 8:08guys, in your 50s and 60s, you're kind of, you're slow.
- 8:12And you may not have the energy of a 30 or a 40-year-old. And I get it.
- 8:19But women in their 50s and 60s, they still have a lot of energy. They do.
- 8:24Especially if they keep themselves in decent shape. They just want to go out
- 8:27and dance and have fun and live.
- 8:29A lot of times where the kids are off to school or about to be off to school,
- 8:34we've sacrificed a lot of our lives to take care of other people.
- 8:38And now it's time to take care of us.
- 8:40You don't want a guy who just sit there and watch Netflix. No. Friday night. No.
- 8:44And talk about weather. And I will say most of the divorced women I have met
- 8:49are much happier single than they were married because we felt like,
- 8:54especially Generation Xers.
- 8:56Yeah. We felt like all we did was take care of our husbands and worked our butts
- 9:00to the bone and took care of the family and the finances and the children, and it was exhausting.
- 9:06Took care of the house alone. Took care of everything. So now we find ourselves
- 9:10single, and we're like, wait a second.
- 9:12I don't have to be a slave to a man that abuses me. You know what I mean? Yeah.
- 9:16That I get to have fun with a man that respects me, wants to play and have some good time. Yeah.
- 9:22I don't plan to hide Wasubia again.
- 9:25Yeah. You know, and then 70 years old guy, nothing to do that. Oh, no, no.
- 9:30Oh, don't lie. It's 70 years old, like Harrison Ford.
- 9:34Yes. You know, it's funny. I married a couple of years younger too.
- 9:37Mine was a couple of years younger than me.
- 9:39And he ended up with a woman that was much older than me. You see? See, it does happen.
- 9:45So the reality is, is that a lot of people are going way older in their selection process. Right.
- 9:52And the one thing you find is that,
- 9:55When you date a younger man, they are going to come at you as an equal if they're emotionally mature.
- 10:03And they're not going to try to fix you because you're going to be a strong,
- 10:06confident woman. They're not even going to try to fix you.
- 10:08So it might be a better match than dating someone else.
- 10:12I will say when I was younger, I dated a lot of older guys though.
- 10:16Yeah, I did too. I did too. And it was a thing because the thing is,
- 10:19is we're looking for a certain level of maturity yeah older
- 10:22was mature enough for us but now the older
- 10:25is kind of dry and boring am I wrong yeah I
- 10:28did and I'm glad I didn't marry I did not marry
- 10:31the older guy because I probably enough divorce because the energy just not
- 10:34match it doesn't match and I will say sexually oh my god no I it's it's a different
- 10:41thing it's a different ballpark it's a whole new different thing yeah so So
- 10:45when they're in their mid-50s and up,
- 10:48and some guys even in their mid-40s,
- 10:51a lot of them aren't in the best of shape anymore.
- 10:53Right. And when they get out of shape, good luck.
- 10:57Right. Think of it as nowadays, there is no more. You move up from fast food to fine dining.
- 11:03You take your time and you enjoy every bite of it.
- 11:07You don't want those fast stuff, no. Yeah. Those days are gone.
- 11:12The other thing I think is women are much more into weightlifting now.
- 11:15Oh, yeah. So their bodies, they're staying youthful longer.
- 11:20And women in the past, they weren't really into weightlifting.
- 11:23I mean, I don't think that really took hold until like the 90s. Oh, yeah, the skinny.
- 11:28They were in skinny. And what would happen is by the time women got into their
- 11:3250s and 60s, they started to get osteoporosis.
- 11:35They got sick. They got sick. They got arthritis. They were as sick as the men
- 11:39are in their 50s and 60s now because I see a lot of men.
- 11:42They've got a lot of health conditions, too.
- 11:44Yeah, I think redlifting and keeping up with your physically,
- 11:51mentally, that's the key. What was that old movie, Mrs.
- 11:55Robertson? Mrs. Robertson. I'm talking about Mrs. Robertson.
- 11:58Yeah, where she dated. The graduate.
- 12:01That was really young, though. That was a little scary young.
- 12:04No, that's scary young. He's high school. Yeah.
- 12:06That's not good we're not talking about robbing the cradle or we're
- 12:09not talking here about you know no jailbait no jailbait
- 12:13we are not mrs robertson no jailbait
- 12:17so the other thing is a lot
- 12:20of people are very comfortable going eight to ten years younger oh
- 12:23yeah and i think that it depends on
- 12:26who you are like our friend that's the the bodybuilder
- 12:30she's 73 she's dating 53 20 years
- 12:33younger but she's got the spirit honestly guys of a
- 12:3630 year old so she does she is
- 12:40my idol all the way amazing her spirit her attitude the way she lives it's amazing
- 12:45and it's just a different life stage for us right yes yes yes society i think
- 12:52in the past we got more criticism for dating younger. Mm-hmm.
- 12:57But now I think it's kind of hip. I think it's shifting.
- 13:01Because we're empowered. We are empowered. And I do believe that,
- 13:06If it's more about matching energy and matching person than matching ages. Yeah.
- 13:12And it may be funny, but the reality is then if you date younger,
- 13:16you're going to have a good sex life for a lot longer.
- 13:19Funny you say that. I just came back from this yoga retreat.
- 13:22Yeah. And the night after, we go out to the rooftop bar.
- 13:27First, I met two amazing women. Yeah. One is 58, one is 60. Yeah.
- 13:34And their boyfriend is only 50 years old. And they're amazing. Yeah.
- 13:40Amazing. Good-looking woman. Taking care of themselves. Very spiritual.
- 13:45Very into outdoor weightlifting. Taking care of hormones.
- 13:50Taking care of themselves. Oh, yeah. And their boyfriend, I think,
- 13:54got to be like 50, 52 tops. And they were good-looking?
- 13:57They are hot. Okay. But were they emotionally mature? Oh, my God,
- 14:01yes. So it was a match? Yes. is their energy together.
- 14:05They don't, they bite together. They practice yoga together.
- 14:08They went for a hike together.
- 14:10Even when they sit down talking to each other, looking at each other,
- 14:13it's just amazing energy.
- 14:14I think that's part of the trick too, is that you have to find somebody that's
- 14:19an emotional match because if they're not emotionally matched with you, it's not going to work.
- 14:25So just saying, oh, I want to date younger and just go and finding somebody
- 14:2720 years younger, that's not going to work. They have to be emotionally mature.
- 14:31The other thing you need to worry about, and I was talking to someone about
- 14:34this today is if I'm 50 and I want to date somebody in their 30s,
- 14:40I need to make sure they don't want to have any more kids.
- 14:43Some guys don't want to have kids these days, which is fine.
- 14:47But if they're in their mid-30s and they're wanting to find someone to have
- 14:51one or two more kids, I'm not going to have any more children.
- 14:54I mean, I could, but I don't want to because that would make me 70 by the time
- 14:59they're going to college.
- 15:00Oh my God, no. So I think I'm kind of done with the having kids,
- 15:05but you need to find someone that's okay with that.
- 15:08So just make sure they realize that, yeah, hey, if you're with me and this is
- 15:13going to be a relationship, we're not having children.
- 15:16But some young guy, they don't want children. They just want all of you to themselves.
- 15:20That's true, but sometimes that changes. Just like women have a biological clock,
- 15:24sometimes men do too. So just, and a lot of times by the time they're 35,
- 15:28they've already had a few kids and they don't want any more. That's true.
- 15:33So there's that. And especially since like me, I waited until I,
- 15:37my first child was 37. Yeah.
- 15:40So I was like, you know, they might have kids the same age as me and they're 35.
- 15:45Who knows? You know, so anyway, but the question you have to ask yourself, are you dating people?
- 15:52With confidence or are you dating because you're afraid to be older and i i
- 15:58will date at any age honestly i don't really care age is not a thing to me it
- 16:01is energy for me but the more i've been dating older the less i'm enjoying it
- 16:08and i found that a lot of the older ones are kind of.
- 16:12Damaged to the point that i have to fix
- 16:15them and i don't want to fix anybody yeah i
- 16:18need somebody that's emotionally healthy that's not
- 16:22insecure and that is comfortable
- 16:25in their skin and i'm telling you something happens between
- 16:2855 and 65 in the
- 16:32men in men and they shift into this
- 16:35depression sad state that they're
- 16:39not the happiest in their skin anymore i see
- 16:42and maybe it's because their libido is going down
- 16:45their testosterone is going down maybe
- 16:48it's the the men menopause for
- 16:50men yeah menopause we'll call it menopause menopause
- 16:54that they're going through well the midnight crisis can happen anytime between
- 16:5940 and 60 yeah but i think usually happens between 40 and 50 that's when they're
- 17:04like oh i feel like i'm getting older and i need to change stuff but like Between
- 17:0855 and 65, that's when they're getting ready to retire.
- 17:12But what also happens to men is they can't perform the same they used to.
- 17:17Their testosterone goes down.
- 17:20They're getting beat out by younger men.
- 17:23And women are just getting started. I mean, we're like, our libido is going
- 17:26up and theirs is going down.
- 17:28I'm telling you, though, I think right now when I look at the younger and the
- 17:32girls in the 30s versus the women in the 50s, I think the 50 women,
- 17:39it's more attractive to me, for me anyway. Well, yeah, because we're confident.
- 17:43Right. And the women in their 30s, they're still finding themselves. They're secure.
- 17:48Yeah, we're more secure in who we are. Not all, but a lot of times.
- 17:53So a lot of times we may be more aligned with somebody in their late 30s,
- 17:57early 40s, in our 50s and 60s.
- 18:00So it's an alignment issue too.
- 18:03And one of the other things is I have found is that,
- 18:07When a man is getting ready in their 50s and 60s to retire, their careers are going down.
- 18:13I see. And a lot of times ours are flourishing.
- 18:17Right. And then there's a power struggle. Mm-hmm.
- 18:20And they may get envious of your growth into your career because you have a
- 18:24lot of energy in your 50s and 60s, women do. Yeah.
- 18:27Because we've gone through menopause and we may have already gone,
- 18:31some have, some haven't.
- 18:32And menopause is once it's done, we feel pretty inspired. Yeah.
- 18:36You know? And children are older. Children are older, so we don't have to spread
- 18:40our energy so much between multiple different things. We can focus on one thing.
- 18:44And remember, ladies, when we're focused on one or two things, we're powerful.
- 18:49I think a lot of the problems women have is that we do everything for everyone,
- 18:54and we split our energy. But when we can come back to ourselves and to our center,
- 19:00my gosh, we have so much more energy, and we're so much more powerful.
- 19:03All right. Application open, guys.
- 19:06Applications are open. Go look at those older women.
- 19:08Diva Mia is going for younger. Oh, I don't know about that yet, but I'm open.
- 19:13But the question is, do you think that younger men are looking for a forever
- 19:19partner or just a plaything?
- 19:21Because I will say I've gotten a lot of younger men on dating apps in their 20s even, 26, 27.
- 19:27I'm like, dude, I could be your mom. but anyway in their
- 19:3120s that have propositioned me and it
- 19:34was not for a forever partner proposition they just wanted
- 19:37they wanted a a play thing if
- 19:40you will and one guy even sent me a list of reasons why they date older really
- 19:46and it's one of it was like they know what they want in bed they're sexually
- 19:49mature and then they'll also do your laundry oh my god and they'll make you a sandwich after.
- 20:00Did you really? Yeah, it was so funny. It was adorable. But yeah,
- 20:04I've gotten a lot, a lot. And I, a lot.
- 20:08And there's one guy that was like 30. And he says, I only date women that are 45 and up.
- 20:14He says, they just know what they want. And they know how they want it.
- 20:18Wow. And they know how to ask for it.
- 20:21I mean, I mean, that's what our podcast has been about, right?
- 20:24Telling people that you need to be self-confident, you need to be empowered.
- 20:30And there you have it. The table really had turned.
- 20:34Normally, it's the other way around. A guy go for a younger woman. I know.
- 20:37Well, here's the other thing, if we think about it, not to be a little too,
- 20:41but women tend to live longer than men.
- 20:43That's true. It's true. So if you're in your 50s and 60s and you're looking
- 20:47for a forever partner that you want to live with for the rest of your life,
- 20:50If you get someone 10 years younger than you, you may live your lives together forever.
- 20:56If you get someone older than you, you might end up taking care of them.
- 21:02You're either going to take care of them or they're going to die earlier than
- 21:04you. And then you're going to have to find somebody again in your 70s. That's true.
- 21:08And that hurts, right? Yeah. Like our bodybuilder friend, I can totally see her living into 100.
- 21:14I think so, too. I think so, too. Her energy, vitality, she's going to live into 100.
- 21:18So i'm all for it i'm all about i'm
- 21:21following with a 53 year old man who's probably gonna
- 21:24die in his 80s yeah so they'll die
- 21:27around the same time now i don't want to get too grotesque about death
- 21:30etc but that's a reality so if you're dating younger
- 21:34you're more likely to have a true forever partner
- 21:37well sure yes i think
- 21:40but our friend i think
- 21:43everybody should should look at her she is my idol
- 21:46she's amazing she is amazing i don't care now if you're a younger man and you're
- 21:52wanting to date an older woman i will say we require a certain level of respect
- 21:58that you're not going to give to a younger woman so if you come into it like
- 22:02you're dating a 30 something.
- 22:04And you're rude or you don't open car doors or you don't take us out or you don't respect.
- 22:09You're not gonna you're not gonna be able to match a woman's
- 22:12energy in her 50s because she's going to have a certain level of respect
- 22:15that she's going to require yeah you know
- 22:18especially if you're just a boy toy like one of those pretty
- 22:21boys that doesn't have you know hasn't got a successful career
- 22:24and hasn't made it for himself and you're dating an older
- 22:27woman because you want to be taken care of because there are those wow
- 22:30the boy toys you know how there used to be women that
- 22:33just looked for men so that they could pay for their stuff now
- 22:37it's switched and now we have a lot of men that
- 22:40are it's reverse where they want to be taken care
- 22:43of financially and they're looking
- 22:46for a woman to financially take care of them they're good-looking men so there
- 22:49are i they're arm candy from women yeah yeah yeah yeah so that happens too but
- 22:55you better make sure you step up in the respect in the chivalrous way yeah you
- 22:59have to especially if you want to date the successful older woman. It's true.
- 23:06Now, the other thing you have to think of is someone in their 50s and 60s is going to love to travel.
- 23:13Yeah. And if a man is mid-career, I don't know how much they can travel. No.
- 23:19I don't think how much they could afford there's a question well and
- 23:22it depends every guy's going to be different right so when you're
- 23:25looking younger and you know my i
- 23:28think my dating app preference was set to 45 to
- 23:3155 i think if i ever go
- 23:34back on the dating apps i would have to adjust it to go
- 23:38maybe go 35 oh that scares me
- 23:41a little i will say right 35 wow they
- 23:46would be able to keep up with me then though that would be nice
- 23:49so i i do think that
- 23:52your value doesn't decline as we get older i
- 23:55think it compounds i think we're like compound money we're
- 23:58like interest earned i think women as you get older you all of these elements
- 24:03come to be together and we just your confidence you're secure it just go up
- 24:09the roof it does and you just take care of yourself that's it it does I think
- 24:13the ability to focus just on one man helps as well.
- 24:17Because at this age, your kid's done. You know, it's just you.
- 24:21You take care of you now. Yeah. And I do think respect is huge. Yeah.
- 24:26And one of the things you'll get from a younger man, hopefully,
- 24:29is more respect. Because I will say some of the older men aren't so respectful.
- 24:33No? Some are respectful, like they'll be chivalrous, but they're not so respectful
- 24:37when it comes to your emotions.
- 24:39I see. So if we can find a man that's respectful, I'd date younger. I know.
- 24:45I would consider it for sure. I think age is only numbers.
- 24:50Now, why do you think it is that so many people lately are lying about their age? I think insecure.
- 24:58You think so? Mm-hmm. I dated a guy that lied about his age.
- 25:01Yeah? Yeah, he said he was seven years younger than he was.
- 25:04Hmm. So I don't know why people do lie about their age. Maybe because they feel they should be that age.
- 25:11Like me, I'm 60. I don't feel I'm 60. I should be 50.
- 25:14Think well and you look young too yeah you
- 25:17look you look like you could be 50 you think so yeah i
- 25:20know so the thing is how you feel maybe that's
- 25:22how they feel maybe maybe he didn't feel seven
- 25:25years older yeah you know i mean i
- 25:29i don't really care about my age as long as i feel good and i look
- 25:31good yeah i mean look at look at renee she's publishing
- 25:35everywhere she's 73 she doesn't care and she
- 25:37looks like she's 35 or 40 so yeah she
- 25:41she's hot yeah i think
- 25:44diva cat wants to date yeah diva renee oh i'm all for it her muscle her ab oh
- 25:52yeah her butt she's got a nice butt anyway i think that men after men turn 60
- 26:00i think they feel like they're too old.
- 26:04And they come across as not being excited or active,
- 26:08especially virile in the bedroom.
- 26:10Yeah, maybe they're ready to just sit in the couch, watch Netflix.
- 26:12Yeah, and some of them date younger women, but a lot of them lately,
- 26:16a lot of younger women don't want to date that older.
- 26:18No, they don't. Who wants to do that? Do you?
- 26:21No. See? You want to just sit home, watch Netflix, and talk about weather?
- 26:25I will say most of the younger women that are dating older, like older than five years.
- 26:32Are dating them because they want to be kept.
- 26:35Ah, I see. Now the question is, on the younger men, how many of the younger
- 26:40men are dating older women because they want to be kept? I don't think it's the same.
- 26:44I think younger men are dating older women for the maturity level.
- 26:49And honestly, we're, I think, more focused in our 50s and less chaotic mentally.
- 26:55Maybe we should interview older guys. I think we should. Right?
- 27:00A really good-looking one for me. Yeah.
- 27:03We need to. Maybe get like two or three good-looking younger men that are really good-looking.
- 27:11Make it look like the street talk. Remember that show, Street Talk?
- 27:14You just come up to people on the street and start asking questions.
- 27:18That might have to be a podcast, too. Yeah.
- 27:21I remember that show. You know, I think society's standards are changing.
- 27:26I think that the dogma related to the older women and younger men, it's just different.
- 27:33It has been a lot of movies making about older women with younger men, too, though.
- 27:40I think the movies are huge. Yeah. I quite like it. Yeah.
- 27:44Yeah. I think that people, even when they're older, should always tell their
- 27:50age, though. They shouldn't lie about it. I think they should be truthful.
- 27:53Yeah. I don't know why people have to lie about their age. Women have been doing it for a while, though.
- 27:57They do? I had a friend that would never say her age. Every birthday, she was 29 years old.
- 28:03And it was so funny, because I went back and saw her on a trip I went on, and...
- 28:09I said to her, I go, well, you're like way younger than me anyway.
- 28:13And she's like, I'm like four years younger than you.
- 28:16We're like the same generation. I was like, well, I don't know.
- 28:18You've been 29 every year for like the past 15 years.
- 28:23Okay, we started with my 29th birthday. Again. Again.
- 28:27But women have been so, so scared of their age. And I don't think it matters
- 28:32to women as much, especially if you look young.
- 28:34I don't know. It's kind of a fun thing to be told, because I am told this a
- 28:38lot. You don't look that old.
- 28:40I get told that a lot. And so people are like, oh my gosh, you look like you're
- 28:44in, I would have said mid-30s to early 40s is what people tell me. Yeah.
- 28:48It's energy, but I also look younger. Yeah. So that helps too.
- 28:53Yeah. You know, all the day people wear like tons of makeup and I think that makes you look old.
- 28:58I barely wear makeup. Now because of bare face, you know, just a little recourse,
- 29:03I think it very, making you very young, especially your real skin, you know? Yeah.
- 29:08That's why you look very young. Yeah. Because you rarely wear.
- 29:10I very rarely wear makeup.
- 29:12Yeah. I think that people that lie about their age, there's something underlying as well.
- 29:17Insecure. I think they're also manipulating you.
- 29:20They do. I do. I think they're just dishonest people. And when they lie about
- 29:24that, they're going to lie about everything else.
- 29:26Maybe. And how are you going to ever get that trust back? If you lie to somebody
- 29:29about your age in the future, how are you ever going to get that trust back?
- 29:34What are you going to do? Six months into a relationship, tell them they're the true age?
- 29:37Shouldn't you know it's like by the way i'm not 52 i'm 62
- 29:40yeah you can't do that because that's
- 29:43the first thing i think of if they're lying about their age what else are they
- 29:46lying about right that's true leaving the
- 29:50line so now let's discuss okay diva
- 29:54mia is thinking about dating younger after this conversation go
- 29:58for it now what do i need to do and
- 30:01what do you need to do as a listener if you want
- 30:04to date younger in order to get yourself in
- 30:08a better position to date younger you just
- 30:11have to i don't think you need to do anything else i
- 30:14think personally i need to mentally prepare for it because i i'm gonna ask myself
- 30:19am i drawn to their energy or what am i specifically looking for in a younger
- 30:24man because honestly up until this point i thought I was going to date somebody
- 30:27maybe within two to three years of my age either way.
- 30:32But if I'm going to go significantly younger, I'm going to say,
- 30:35well, look, I'm going to have to be more spontaneous myself.
- 30:38Right. And I'm not very spontaneous. You know me. I'm a planner. Right.
- 30:42And do I have the mindset to match the energy of some man that's younger?
- 30:47Yeah. That's another thing. Are you looking for a long-term relationship?
- 30:50I'm always looking for a long-term relationship.
- 30:53I don't do one-night stands. I don't do fly-by-night dating.
- 30:59And I've also found that if someone gives me red flags, which I'm very proud
- 31:05of now, if somebody gives me red flags within the first week or two, I just let them go.
- 31:11Right. I used to give them multiple opportunities.
- 31:15But now I've realized that the red flags, if they're there in the very beginning,
- 31:21they're going to be there forever.
- 31:23So I don't even want to waste more than a week or two. So are the younger men,
- 31:28are they going to give me less red flags? That might be a thing as well.
- 31:31Yeah. Are they in it for sure?
- 31:33Are they just in it to have fun, to date?
- 31:35Because I know a lot of people are actually addicted to dating. Yeah.
- 31:39Yes. I have found that there's so much gameplay on the dating apps and people
- 31:42have such a huge roster of people lined up in their dating pool that they just
- 31:48call on whoever they want.
- 31:50Yeah. So you could be dating, talking to a guy for a week and you're supposed
- 31:53to go out, but then they ghost you and then you find out that they're talking
- 31:57to five other women and that they they'll get back to you in a week or two.
- 32:01And I don't play that game. No. So as soon as somebody goes to me, I'm just done.
- 32:04Yeah. So, but will the younger group be more in tuned, especially the guys that
- 32:11are looking to date older?
- 32:13They should be prepared themselves to date older women. Older women don't like
- 32:17to play around with multiple men. No, no, no. We don't play that game.
- 32:20So I think for the guy who are willing to date older women, they might already
- 32:25prepare themselves, just like you prepare yourself for the younger guy. Maybe.
- 32:29Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I think you need to determine your motivation.
- 32:33I think you're right. I think you need to say, hey, am I at a stage in my life
- 32:37where I'm just dating multiple men or am I at a stage where...
- 32:42I want a relationship and I only do relationships. I've never done,
- 32:45I don't do a roster of guys. Like I'm dating one guy and I'm just dating that
- 32:50guy. And I know people say that's crazy.
- 32:52And they say, well, some people say that's crazy. Some people say you can't
- 32:56be exclusive with a guy until they're, you're engaged or whatever,
- 33:01or you can't be exclusive with a guy until you guys have formally said it. But here's my thing.
- 33:06If I'm, if I'm dating a guy and I've gone on two or three dates with a guy,
- 33:11I'm not dating a bunch of other guys. I see.
- 33:14First date, yes. I might have two or three first date in a week. Who knows?
- 33:18I haven't done that for a while because I'm not seriously dating right now.
- 33:22But there was a time where I would have first dates and I'd have two or three
- 33:25of them lined up for a week.
- 33:26And then if I liked someone, then I would go on a second date.
- 33:29But the problem was I wasn't liking anyone.
- 33:32And that's fine. But if I've gone out two or three times and I think by the
- 33:36third date, you kind of start to have a connection with someone.
- 33:39Otherwise, why are you still going out with them?
- 33:41Yeah, you know, yeah. So by the third date, if I've gone on three or four dates,
- 33:46I'm just dating them. I don't need to play the field, per se. Right.
- 33:51So if they are not the right fit, I can let them go quickly.
- 33:55So younger men, I don't know if that's the same mindset for younger men.
- 34:00It might be. We're going to have to try it out. We're going to have to try it
- 34:03out. I can't speak to the younger men.
- 34:05I will say one of the things that I do love is confidence in a man.
- 34:09And something about younger men in their 30s, late 30s and early 40s,
- 34:14they're pretty darn confident.
- 34:16The late, the early 40s. About everything.
- 34:19Yes. They're confident about how they look. Mm-hmm. They're confident about
- 34:22their bedroom performance.
- 34:24Mm-hmm. They're confident about, typically they're confident financially too.
- 34:28If they're going to be on my level, they're going to have to be anyway.
- 34:30Yeah. They try stoning still up, not low yet. Yeah. So they don't have to lie about their age. Yes.
- 34:36You know? So they shouldn't lie about their age, but yeah, so they're still
- 34:42spry, which gives me another solid 20-plus years if I go for somebody in their
- 34:47early 40s or late 30s. Yeah.
- 34:50Before they have to have supplemental pharmaceuticals.
- 34:56That could happen. You know that, right? Guy believes in science.
- 35:00Yeah. Yeah, I think you should go for it. I'm telling you. Yeah.
- 35:04You know, and it's nice to be desired by a younger man. I will say that's got to be interesting.
- 35:09Go for it. Go for it? Mm-hmm. I think a younger man will help you flourish.
- 35:17Mm-hmm. And hopefully be supportive of you. It's going to make yourself glowing. Oh, no.
- 35:23Diva Kat wants me to walk in here glowing, and then she'll know.
- 35:26Yeah, I walked in. I'll know.
- 35:28So if you're wanting to date a younger man, you just need to make sure your
- 35:32body's prepared for it, too.
- 35:34That's another thing. You cannot be out of shape.
- 35:38For sure. You're going to have to be in great physical condition and mental condition.
- 35:43Now, I think mentally we can all day long show up a lot of younger women.
- 35:48Now, it's not a competition, but, you know, you need to honor you.
- 35:52But physically, you're going to have to be in the same shape as a younger woman. For sure.
- 35:56So don't think that, oh, you're going to date younger guys and you can just
- 36:00let yourself go. No, you've got to be in great shape. You've got to be stylish.
- 36:04You've got to be emotionally intelligent and very vibrant. like our friend is.
- 36:09I mean, you can be resistible at any age as long as you're vibrant.
- 36:13Right. And lively. Yes.
- 36:16And I think that not all younger men are mature enough to date us.
- 36:21No. You have to be very selective when you go younger.
- 36:24Yeah, for sure. Because some young men have very mature, it depends how maturely
- 36:29they are, you know? Yeah.
- 36:31They could be 30-something, but they already accomplished a lot of things.
- 36:35Like an old soul. Right, right, right. I love that. Yeah.
- 36:38An old soul is like somebody that's emotionally intelligent. They're respectful.
- 36:43They might even have shared values. Yeah.
- 36:46Not just looking at your hotness, just shared values at what you value most,
- 36:50some of your core values. Yes. Yeah.
- 36:54They're pretty much set, I think. I do think you need to have a boundary up
- 36:58there because there's a lot of young men that have fetishes and older women now.
- 37:02Yes, for sure. It's like a mama complex. Yeah, I think you have to make sure,
- 37:06too, though, right? Are they going to be good with your children?
- 37:09Yes. You know what I mean? Are they going to be good with your children?
- 37:11Are they going to respect you or is this just something to get their rocks off
- 37:15because they have a fetish?
- 37:16Right. Or do they still want more kids?
- 37:19The kids thing is huge. Yeah. Because you don't want to, you also don't want
- 37:23to pull somebody out of the dating pool that wants more children when you can't have them.
- 37:28So let's talk about where you find these younger men. I don't know.
- 37:32So I think. Spoke game maybe?
- 37:35I'm not going that young.
- 37:40It's it's probably not going to be friends of friends
- 37:43because i think a lot of times in our 50s and 60s
- 37:46we have friends that are in our 50s and 60s i don't 60 yeah i don't have any
- 37:50friends that are more than 10 years older or 10 years younger than me me either
- 37:54except for our renee she's 20 years older than over 20 years older than me but
- 37:59well the other friend she's 50 and Well, she's the same age, yeah.
- 38:04But most of my friend, though, is a lot younger.
- 38:07Well, that's because you have a young spirit, though. Yeah, like my yoga guru. Yeah.
- 38:11I think I'm the same age with her mom, a couple of them. Yeah.
- 38:15They're in their 30s. Okay. Yeah. So you might know some younger men that you can set me up with.
- 38:21Now my head is spinning. Huh.
- 38:24Somebody that's, I think 35 would be my lowest. I don't think I would want to
- 38:28go more than 15 years or so underneath my age. Mm-hmm. So.
- 38:33I don't love, I don't mean, it has to be somebody in my yoga circle.
- 38:38No, it has to be somebody emotionally mature and somebody that's financially stable.
- 38:43I'm not going to financially support a man ever again either.
- 38:46That's the thing is, ladies, when you're in your 50s and 60s,
- 38:49and if you date somebody too young, you might be financially supporting them.
- 38:54And I mean, if you want to do that, that's fine. I just don't want to do that ever.
- 38:58Yeah, because some of them are just looking for sugar mama.
- 39:01A lot of them are looking for sugar mama. So they either have a fetish or they're
- 39:05looking for a sugar mama. I will say I went to Cabo one time.
- 39:08And went to a really high-end resort, and there were these older women,
- 39:12and I'm talking full-on white hair, 70-something, and they would have eye candy
- 39:20easily in their 40s on their arms.
- 39:23See? Oh, my God. And it was because those men wanted a sugar mama,
- 39:28and they knew these women had money, and they would be completely taken care
- 39:32of, and when the woman passed, they would collect it all.
- 39:35You know, women used to do that with men.
- 39:38They would go marry a really old guy that was 10 years away from death or less.
- 39:42Remember Ann Annacole Smith?
- 39:44And they would marry older, and then the older person would pass away,
- 39:48and then they would collect a fortune.
- 39:51In Anna's case, I think she really loved him. It can be. And I'm not saying
- 39:56that you can't love older.
- 39:59But there is a, you know, I don't know if I could date somebody 50 years older
- 40:03than me because they'd be one foot in the grave, you know what I mean, or 30 years older.
- 40:07It's so funny you say that. Our new friend that I just met, he called her my mama.
- 40:12Yeah? Mm-hmm. She's seven years older than her.
- 40:15I mean, than him. Seven years is not enough to call somebody your mama.
- 40:19But she always called her mama.
- 40:22I mean, he always called her mama. And the thing is, she's already married,
- 40:26two kids, two girl kids, and he didn't want any more kids.
- 40:28They've been together for 25 years already.
- 40:31Yeah, they met each other when she's in her 40s, and he's only 32, 33. Well, that's good.
- 40:38So there's different platforms that you can find these older men or these younger
- 40:44men on. There is platforms? There are.
- 40:46Well, most of the guys that were younger that wanted to date me were on Bumble.
- 40:50Oh, not a Bumble or Hinge. Bumble or Hinge, yeah.
- 40:53Yes, yes. And that app called Date Your Age, where you're dating people right around your age group.
- 40:59But if you're looking to go younger, Bumble or Hinge or OkCupid, you can set your age.
- 41:06I mean, you can even set your age on Facebook dating.
- 41:08So if you want to date younger, that's the way to go.
- 41:12I heard a lot about Match.com, too.
- 41:14I don't like Match.com. I did not like Match.com. My best friend,
- 41:18Mary, his wife, they found each other on Match.com.
- 41:22Well, here's the thing. On Match.com, I wasn't setting a younger age.
- 41:27Remember, I was only doing 45 to 55.
- 41:29But if I'm going to go down to 35, maybe. I don't know. Might just go for the real deal. Yes.
- 41:34Just make sure they don't look for a sugar mama. Yeah.
- 41:38And there's also age gap-friendly platforms like Age Match, so you can match
- 41:42specific or elite singles.
- 41:44Wow. And then the gym is always a good place to meet them too,
- 41:49I think. I think the gym, happy hours.
- 41:52So, yeah, I think you can meet them at gyms or even at conferences.
- 41:57There are single men at conferences. I've never picked up a guy from a conference, but never say never.
- 42:03I mean, it might be a fun way to go because then you have similar interests too. A yoga retreat.
- 42:07Or a wellness retreat. A wellness retreat.
- 42:10Yeah. Were there any single ladies picking up men at the wellness retreat?
- 42:14Uh i know it was 2 000 people there although i must say if i went to a yoga
- 42:18retreat i would probably expect most of the men to be gay that weren't married
- 42:22already really yeah if it's a yoga retreat and a guy is there and he's not married
- 42:29and he's single i'm most likely to be gay,
- 42:33I follow two, you know, I'm very passionate about yoga.
- 42:38So I follow two high-performance professional yoga.
- 42:42One, I only go with Johnny Cass, Johnny Keys, and other one, Travis Elliott.
- 42:48They're both hot and they're both straight guy. Yeah. Well, that can be.
- 42:53I'm just saying I would say hit or miss.
- 42:56It's not where I would go to find a single man is at a yoga retreat.
- 43:00Oh, I see. I think travel clubs could attract, like you could go on a singles
- 43:03cruise. They have this adventure cruise.
- 43:06Oh, there's adventure groups now. Have you seen those?
- 43:09Like everywhere they have adventure groups where you can go and you can go snorkeling,
- 43:13you can go surfing and paddleboarding.
- 43:15And you go on these adventure groups, and that's a great way to find men.
- 43:19And they're probably high-vibing men, and they might appreciate older women. Who knows?
- 43:24That's so true. So way back when, when I was still in corporate world,
- 43:28right? So we have this girl from Australia. We hired her. She's in marketing.
- 43:32So after that, we're just talking. Hey, what are you thinking? She's from New Zealand.
- 43:37And she says, I'm going to come to America, marry American cowboy.
- 43:42Oh, wow. She signed up for those events.
- 43:45She met her husband. Really? And he's younger.
- 43:49You know, it's so funny. I had a friend last night send me the picture of somebody from New Zealand.
- 43:54And then they called me because they were at a bar.
- 43:57And then they had him talk to me he was really cute New Zealand
- 44:01it's New Zealand Australia I think you need to adventure out yeah I think that
- 44:07younger men may be more flexible as well at you know the requirements because
- 44:12I think when you get somebody older they're more set in their ways yeah I think
- 44:18your energy you go for younger men because you still like to do stuff you like.
- 44:23You know, like a range. Let's go to the beach.
- 44:26Let's pack up. Let's go for a hike without like... I like to go hiking. Yes.
- 44:30You know what I mean? Yeah. I would say I do want somebody that's more active.
- 44:33And I think a lot of men our age want to stay home and sit on the couch and not do much.
- 44:41And I did date a guy that was 53 that was very active.
- 44:45But he's very close to my age, right? But he had been active
- 44:48and he'd been a bachelor for a long time so i
- 44:52would say that i can date
- 44:55someone my age but it's going to be the unique individual that
- 44:58can keep up with me for sure i would vote for
- 45:00travel group order you think i need to go on like a singles cruise not a single
- 45:05cruise like you know i went to an adventure thing in town in town yeah because
- 45:10then you meet people locally too right you know there's also meetup And Meetup
- 45:15has different singles groups based on age.
- 45:18And, like, there's a Meetup in our area that's for 35 to 60.
- 45:23Yeah. So I can meet people from 35 and up then. Mm-hmm. I think at 35,
- 45:29we're less likely to find people that still want to have kids.
- 45:31Right. If you like dancing, you could go on this country light cruise dance with Renee.
- 45:36Ah. I could do that in November. Yeah. Yeah.
- 45:41You know? You know, I will talk. I'm open to finding a person.
- 45:46The guy from New Zealand wants to fly in to see me. And I was like,
- 45:49well, that was kind of neat.
- 45:50Go for it. That would be interesting if I do something like that or fly out
- 45:54to see him. Or let him come first.
- 45:57He seems sweet. I'd have to talk to him 100 times on the phone.
- 46:00But it wasn't a scam because my friend was sitting at a bar talking to him.
- 46:05So he was actually from New Zealand. But, yeah, he's only in that area for three
- 46:10months. But we'll see. But anyway...
- 46:13Is dating them for you, or is it going to be too awkward because of your social
- 46:18friends and situations, too? You have to consider that.
- 46:22Do you think the social pressures and the judgments, if you go really younger?
- 46:26Now, I'm not talking like 20s. I'm talking 10 to 15 to 20 years younger.
- 46:31You're asking me who married somebody seven years younger. Did you have?
- 46:35Yeah, exactly. Did you have any? No.
- 46:37No? Did he? No. No, it was just love. We are fully confident.
- 46:43Okay. And you know me, I walk into the room like, I don't care.
- 46:46I think you have to enjoy dating whatever age group without any guilt.
- 46:51And it should be about a personal match. It's different now, too.
- 46:55Right. When I was in high school and I went to my senior prom with my 26-year-old
- 47:00date, it was a little awkward because my principal came up to me and said,
- 47:05you know, you shouldn't be dating someone like that, especially the neighbor track coach.
- 47:10Duh. Yeah, that was kind of funny. I dated the track coach from a neighbor town.
- 47:15But that's, you know, that was a 10-year gap or 8-year gap. And that was different.
- 47:22Now, 8 years doesn't seem like as much when we get older, right?
- 47:258 years could be... I just think people put so much time.
- 47:29Uh, what's that word? Pressure. Pressure and expectation on age. They do.
- 47:37It should be just, you know, it's a mutual thing.
- 47:40You women, young men walk into a room, attract each other, who cares how old you are? Yeah.
- 47:45And who cares what you do? And here's the interesting thing.
- 47:49It can be empowering for a woman to date younger.
- 47:52There can be some stigmas attached to it. Yeah.
- 47:55And some people may actually admire you for it, while other people will judge
- 47:59you for it. So you're going to have both sides of the coin.
- 48:01Yeah, I have no problem walking to the bar and just sit there and order my martini
- 48:05and walk up to the guy and talk to anybody like... I know you don't.
- 48:09But everybody loves you, Kat. No, it depends how you walked in,
- 48:13how confident you are. That's how you bring up yourself.
- 48:16Well, I'm confident in myself. I just don't like people like you do.
- 48:22You like to talk to everyone.
- 48:24I would rather stay by myself and because i'm very introverted you're just a
- 48:29crazy extrovert you're one of the biggest,
- 48:31extroverts i've ever seen especially i'm asian i
- 48:35know you're you're like you talk to everybody in fact even when we were on our
- 48:40cruise together that guy in the hot tub was him not even though you had a wedding
- 48:43ring i was like wow i had no idea that he was speaking i was just talking i
- 48:48know you were clueless we were all joking about it it's like everybody said
- 48:51that guy's hitting on Kat And everybody's like, yep.
- 48:54And Kat doesn't even realize it. Everybody's like, yep.
- 48:56Yeah, I was just like, blah, blah, blah. I know everything about him in that one. I know you did.
- 49:01He was really bragging about all the stuff he had, too. Oh, that's what he has.
- 49:05You know, he was like, oh, I used to be a millionaire. Now, I'm not anymore.
- 49:08Because he had the X-Y-T-C. I didn't even catch on that. I always just kept talking.
- 49:12You know, so when a man dates younger, the joke is, oh, he still got it.
- 49:16Look, he can still perform.
- 49:18Yes. When a woman does, we're called cougars or desperate.
- 49:24That's what they say. That's a social stigma that's out there.
- 49:27And you know what you're going to say? I'm proud to be a cougar and I'm proud to be desperate.
- 49:31I don't know if I'd be proud to be desperate, but I could be proud to be a cougar.
- 49:37And I don't know. I think it's like if it's more than 10 years.
- 49:40I don't think you're a cougar because you're within the 10 years.
- 49:43But if it's over 10 years, I think that's when they start calling you a cougar.
- 49:47Women should be proud of themselves.
- 49:49Yes. Especially if you could still attract younger guys. Well,
- 49:52like when we were on the cruise and we met Diva Renee, she was getting checked out by the 30-year-old.
- 49:59And her friend that I talked to, I forgot her name already. Remember the lawyer? Yeah.
- 50:04And she was super, super confident. Her boyfriend probably a lot younger,
- 50:08too. I don't know. I don't know.
- 50:10Anyway, older women are, you know, we have a pressure to look younger anyway. Mm-hmm.
- 50:16So a lot of us look younger well into our 60s, 70s, and 80s.
- 50:21All I could say is to the younger men, if you want to date older women,
- 50:26just remember, we know what we want and we are expensive. Yes.
- 50:30That's all I would say. We are expensive.
- 50:34Diva Kat is expensive. Oh, I know.
- 50:39No, I think all women, when you get a certain age, you are expensive.
- 50:43Just think about to get your nails done, your facial.
- 50:46But I was doing all that when I was younger, too. Right, but you need to do
- 50:49extra stuff when you're younger.
- 50:52Some stuff, yeah. Yeah, remember, you're getting expensive. But I'm not looking
- 50:56at a dating partner as someone that pays for my stuff.
- 50:58No, not only that. No, not that. But you just need to make sure the guy has
- 51:02to have class and be prepared for that.
- 51:04Yeah, but I'm okay just paying for my own stuff. I don't need a guy that's going
- 51:08to... But the guy who's going to confront you, even though you met at the gym,
- 51:13you're not going to wear the tank top the whole time. I'm sorry, no tank top got to go.
- 51:18You have to dress naive, red-colored shirt, linen.
- 51:22You know what I'm talking about? Now she's complaining about my clothing.
- 51:26No, not my clothing. The guy that you're going to dig.
- 51:29Oh, yes. No, he has to be at a certain level. Right.
- 51:33That's what I'm saying. He has to align with me financially and physically and
- 51:37mentally and emotionally and sexually.
- 51:39I mean, it just has to be in alignment across the board. When he's younger,
- 51:43he still has to have all of them. Yeah.
- 51:45Remember when we were talking? And that's the trick in life.
- 51:48I think it's to find someone that aligns with you financially is step one.
- 51:54To find somebody that aligns with you emotionally is,
- 51:57Well, these steps are not in any specific order. And then to find somebody that
- 52:02aligns with you physically, sexually, spiritually even.
- 52:05All of those matters. It's all of it. And to have somebody that just aligns
- 52:10with you on all those levels, that's when you kind of know it's the one.
- 52:13And I'm not saying they have to check every box. I think people are too committed
- 52:18saying, oh, he has to be six foot two or, oh, he has to be, he has to make,
- 52:22you know, $500,000 a year.
- 52:24Oh, he has to drive the right car. No, I'm not saying get that detailed.
- 52:29I'm saying, do they align with you? Are they close?
- 52:32Meaning, financially, are we in alignment? Do we have the same values of wanting to travel together?
- 52:38Do we enjoy traveling together?
- 52:41Emotionally, does he sit and complain about his exes all the time?
- 52:44Or is he emotionally mature enough to actually delve deep and be vulnerable and care about?
- 52:50Yeah. And spiritually, I mean, let's talk spiritually.
- 52:53Are they too spiritual? Are they too over-the-top religious?
- 52:56Or are they the right kind of religious? I mean, there's different levels that
- 53:00every single person wants.
- 53:01That's true. I mean, and you... None of those matters. You align so well with your husband.
- 53:07Yeah. It happened naturally, I have to say. Even when I walked in the room,
- 53:11you know, I got out from a bad relationship. I wasn't thinking I'd date anybody. Yeah. It just happened.
- 53:15Yeah, but you align on all those levels. Yeah. Are there any of the levels?
- 53:19So let's say spiritually, do you not align?
- 53:22No. What about emotionally? We came from two different religions,
- 53:25though, but... Yeah, but you're still spiritual together.
- 53:29Emotionally, you align. I know that. Intelligently, you align.
- 53:33Maybe not. But are you attracted to intelligence? Yes. Is he attracted to intelligence?
- 53:40Yes. So then you align. Mm-hmm. Or you wouldn't have had that attraction there.
- 53:46Yeah, I'm messy and he's very neat.
- 53:48That's where something you don't align, but it's not a requirement.
- 53:51See, that's a little tiny detail.
- 53:52Yeah, that's true. Although it might be a big detail. No, it is a big detail. You know what?
- 53:58I went away for this yoga retreat this weekend. So every time I go away on the
- 54:02weekend with the girls or go to my family, I come back home and I was like,
- 54:06are we going to put in our house on listing or something? Because he cleans it?
- 54:11Nothing on the counter, nothing. You know, I'm crazy. I have my kitchen everywhere. Yeah.
- 54:17Nothing on the counter. Well, then I think I'm similar to him because when my
- 54:21kids are gone, my house is so clean. Yeah.
- 54:24And when my kids are here, it's not. And I get to the point where I can't follow around them.
- 54:30Yeah and constantly clean up so i
- 54:33i'm when i'm by myself everything's clean
- 54:36yeah it's just not when the kids are around so you're just
- 54:39like a kid for your husband and i'm
- 54:43always like oh hell break loose oh no my mom gets me where the laundry going
- 54:48and i never finish laundry because i hate putting things away you know and i
- 54:52i honestly think that in the last decade the whole shift and mindset to women
- 54:59dating younger has changed.
- 55:00Yeah. Because I, in the early 2000s, you know, it was kind of a stigma.
- 55:06And now it's just, it's kind of fun.
- 55:09I cannot tell you, even my own family, every one of them had younger boyfriend
- 55:15or younger, at least a couple years younger, five years younger, whatever.
- 55:19Yeah. Well, how young do you think I could go? Oh. Or how young do you think I should entertain?
- 55:26I can't tell on that numbers. Like I said, you walk into a room,
- 55:32talking to people, the energy match, you like the same thing.
- 55:36Don't worry about the age. No, how young? So like on the dating apps, you got to set an age.
- 55:41And I will say the people in their 20s that were hitting on me before,
- 55:45they were doing it because they had a fetish. and I could tell,
- 55:49and I'm not really into that.
- 55:51So I'm thinking, what, 30, 32 would be my youngest?
- 55:56Yeah? I would do 35 up. 35 and up? Yeah. All right.
- 56:00At least if you, you know, they get out, they just say they got out for college,
- 56:04they've been working for 10 years, they probably paid out their student loan already.
- 56:07Well, and then also they're less likely to want children. Right, right, right.
- 56:11Because someone in their 20s may want children, and even if they say they don't,
- 56:16sometimes that changes in their mindset.
- 56:18Right. So I would say that would work for me, too.
- 56:21Yeah, 35 and up, they probably don't. Yeah, you're right. 35 and up, they may not want kids.
- 56:25It's the whole kid thing, too. I think the kid thing's important because I know
- 56:28I didn't really want children until I was in my early 30s. Yeah.
- 56:32And God, no, you don't want any more kids, right? And I don't want any more
- 56:35kids. And if a whoops happened, of course, I would have something, have a child.
- 56:40But I don't want to be raising a child at 70.
- 56:43No, not no. You know, like sending them off to college at 70.
- 56:47That's just too much. I would do 35 and up.
- 56:4935 and up okay all right I think I'm gonna I'm gonna adjust my profile when
- 56:53I get back on the dating apps in a month because I'm not I'm taking a month off. Yeah.
- 56:57When I get back on the dating apps in a month I will adjust my profile and then
- 57:00I'll open it up to 35 year olds.
- 57:03Why are you taking a month off because right now it's the summertime especially
- 57:06you want to go on the Avengers system.
- 57:09Yeah but there's a lot going on in my life that I'm taking care of right now
- 57:12so I'm taking some time off. Okay.
- 57:15You also have to figure out, are you in this just to have some fun?
- 57:19Or are you in this to actually find a partner?
- 57:22You want to find a partner, no? I want to find a partner. That's something. I want a relationship.
- 57:27I'm not in the state, say, hey, I have to go get married. Yeah.
- 57:32But I would say that I do want a relationship. Right.
- 57:35You made it clear there's no one-night stand on it.
- 57:39Yeah, I'm not into a guy that's dating five women. I'm into a guy that wants to date one woman.
- 57:43Right. And that's it. Yeah, I think 35 would be good age. Yeah,
- 57:48I think so, too. I think they'll be more emotionally mature most of the time, too.
- 57:52But you know, some guy that in their 50s, 60s, they've been dating for years.
- 57:58That's a red flag already that you don't want that anyway. But I'm trying to say age doesn't matter.
- 58:03You know, I am seeing a lot of guys in their 50s and 60s and they don't really
- 58:07want relationships. That's what I'm saying.
- 58:09But yet for some reason, the guys in their 40s do. Right. So maybe that's what I'm saying.
- 58:15So I think I've been dating possibly the wrong people. And it's been more of
- 58:19a game, I think, to some of them. And I'm not looking for that.
- 58:23Once your energy mesh, you'll know. Yeah, I'm looking for kind of a fun,
- 58:27curious, playful guy that I can have a deep relationship with.
- 58:32And, you know, here's the thing. We bring a lot to the table to a younger man,
- 58:36too. We have wisdom that they have no idea.
- 58:39And we're stable. We have depth. Yes.
- 58:43And we're fun. Because a lot of us are moving, our children are moving on.
- 58:48Or a lot of us have, you know, we're out of the constant need to take care of
- 58:52a man and now we just want a partner that completes us.
- 58:56I just think you're such a nice catch. Whoever come along, you were ready to like,
- 59:00do stop. I'm ready. It's just the question of, will I find the one?
- 59:06And I may not, but maybe I need to just open it up to younger people in order to find my one.
- 59:11Maybe I was being too, maybe my age limit of 10 years, five years below and
- 59:16five years up was too restrictive.
- 59:19Go for the younger one. Maybe the cool love, you know, somebody who just take
- 59:22you for a ride for the weekend, who knows where you end up.
- 59:24Maybe you end up in another different state. No, I don't.
- 59:28I hope I'm still alive when I end up in that different state. You don't know.
- 59:37I hope that I find someone, too, that's kind of an entrepreneurial spirit,
- 59:42like someone that likes to grow.
- 59:45And growth, to me, is a bigger mindset issue than age. I think if they don't
- 59:49have a growth mindset, that's a killer.
- 59:51Yeah, it doesn't matter how old they are. If they don't have growth,
- 59:54they don't have growth. It doesn't match you.
- 59:56There's just different pressures when they're older that you don't have when they're younger.
- 1:00:02And as long as they don't want children, I think it's great.
- 1:00:05I think it's fine. Go for it. And I do think sexually will be more compatible.
- 1:00:10All younger men, yes. Yeah.
- 1:00:13Because they're still in their prime in their 30s.
- 1:00:16You know, and early 40s. They're still doing pretty well.
- 1:00:20And they're more enthusiastic. We'll just say that. Right. So there's probably
- 1:00:24more sexual chemistry, which is what I've been saying I've been lacking sometimes
- 1:00:28in the older men. That's what I'm saying. Age doesn't matter.
- 1:00:32Because you still have such a young spirit. I hope so, man. And you have young energy.
- 1:00:37I hope that I can find the right one. But you know what? Until I do,
- 1:00:40I think I'm just going to keep looking. Yeah, why not?
- 1:00:43And I'm pretty selective. Yeah. Leave your doors open, baby. Leave those doors open.
- 1:00:50So I think that's about it. I think we covered everything today.
- 1:00:54What do you think? Yeah, to all those ladies, it's okay. It's okay if you're
- 1:00:59going younger? Yeah, open up your windows.
- 1:01:01And if you can be respectful to the ladies that do go younger and don't be so judgmental. Right.
- 1:01:07Because I think it's our time to shine. And I don't think it's fair to say it's
- 1:01:11bad for a woman to go younger, but it's okay for a man to go younger.
- 1:01:15The stereotype is gone. No. And that little glass ceiling we've shattered and
- 1:01:20we have moved past that now. Right.
- 1:01:23So, yeah, to all those ladies, don't feel any pressure. Don't feel pressure.
- 1:01:27You can do what you want. You can have fun and you can enjoy your life because life is short.
- 1:01:31Why not? Life is short. Yes. You have to have lots of orgasms and lots of sex. It's very important.
- 1:01:36I like it. And a younger man can give it to you. For sure.
- 1:01:41Well, let's wrap it up, Diva Kat. So you have a wonderful week,
- 1:01:45everyone. Yeah. I'll talk to you soon. Take care. Ciao, ciao.
- 1:01:51Thanks for tuning in. Like, subscribe, and drop a comment. We love hearing from you.
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