Latest / Rich Fulcher's TalkBox / Rob Auton: Joe Wicks Workouts, Crevices in Your Brain, Tomato Knives, Shocking Gigs & Nationwide Tour I Talk Box Ep.18

Transcript

Rob Auton: Joe Wicks Workouts, Crevices in Your Brain, Tomato Knives, Shocking Gigs & Nationwide Tour I Talk Box Ep.18 · Rich Fulcher's TalkBox

• 0:00
  Hey talk boxers. We have a very special guest
• 0:03
  today, Rob Auten. I don't know if you've seen a
• 0:06
  stand up, but he is very original, very, very intense.
• 0:12
  It's going to be a cool interview.
• 0:14
  OK? It's a different kind of
• 0:16
  interview. OK?
• 0:17
  I don't know why I have my hands like this.
• 0:20
  Touchdown. That's what this interview is, a
• 0:24
  touchdown. So listen, keep watching and
• 0:27
  please feel free to subscribe if you want, press the button and
• 0:32
  we'll talk to you later. Bye.
• 0:35
  Let's see, Rob. What's happening?
• 1:00
  Oh, hey, Rob, how are you? Hi, Rich.
• 1:03
  How's it going? I'm OK, thanks.
• 1:05
  How are you? Have a seat.
• 1:07
  Come on, let's do it. November 18th, 1968.
• 1:16
  OK. Is that made anything to you?
• 1:22
  So how how's it going? There's a strike.
• 1:25
  It's. Your birthday, isn't it?
• 1:27
  Yeah, yeah, there's a tube strike.
• 1:33
  Yeah, I know. It's pretty, pretty dreary.
• 1:37
  It's for four days I think. But they're stopping for the
• 1:41
  weekend, aren't they? Yeah, for all the fun.
• 1:47
  It was all shut off, but I got the Overground and then I got
• 1:51
  the Elizabeth line, so I was really pleased about that.
• 1:54
  That's the thing about London. Sometimes you you'll be out and
• 1:57
  about and then you won't have a way to get home.
• 2:01
  It's like an adventure. You never know what's going to
• 2:04
  happen. Yeah, I know.
• 2:09
  Well, you know, it's adventures. Can't happen in London, can't
• 2:15
  they? Yeah.
• 2:17
  Do you think they're overrated adventures or do you like to
• 2:20
  have? Them overrated Adventures is a
• 2:22
  good name for something. Yes, business.
• 2:25
  Welcome to overrated adventure. Yeah, that's set.
• 2:28
  I've, you know, get get it patented or whatever you need to
• 2:32
  do. I've been watching a lot of
• 2:33
  films about businesses. Oh, really?
• 2:38
  Yeah, the. Boiler Room.
• 2:39
  The founder. The.
• 2:41
  Oh, Michael Keaton. McDonald's.
• 2:44
  Oh yes, I love that movie. Yeah, just saw it for the other
• 2:47
  night. I love when he drove all the way
• 2:49
  to California just to see the milkshake machines.
• 2:52
  Yeah, and it made me really want to have McDonald's.
• 2:57
  Yes. Like all the way through.
• 3:00
  What I didn't like about it though is he was dressed as
• 3:04
  Batman when he walked in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 3:08
  So you're not meant to do that, are you?
• 3:10
  No, no. Like, take your old costumes to
• 3:12
  new films. Yeah, I thought I could just
• 3:15
  wear this. Yeah, come on, man.
• 3:17
  We've got our own costume department.
• 3:20
  But didn't he screw people over the Roy Croc?
• 3:24
  Yeah, yeah, the But were they? Was it the McDonald brothers?
• 3:28
  And they had a patent on the way you cook, right?
• 3:31
  Yeah. Because it was like they had
• 3:33
  stations where you do the burgers, do the fries.
• 3:37
  Yeah. And it's a certain and then.
• 3:39
  What are the masturbation room? Yeah, yeah, I think.
• 3:46
  The two Pickles in every burger. Isn't it 2 Pickles?
• 3:53
  Yeah, Can you believe it? No, 22 slices of pickle.
• 3:57
  And what am I doing with this two slices of pickle?
• 4:00
  Take it out. I thought that was going to be a
• 4:02
  lot heavier than that. Yeah, it's light.
• 4:05
  Well, I've been doing, I've been working out recently, so OK,
• 4:08
  come on. Nice.
• 4:10
  Are you doing free weights or? I'm doing Joe Wicks 7 days of
• 4:15
  sweat workout. You know, Joe Wicks is so
• 4:22
  popular now. My kid, they want him to do
• 4:25
  karate, but it's like it's Joe Wicks style.
• 4:29
  Oh, Joe Wicks Karate. Yeah.
• 4:32
  What's Hotline? It's.
• 4:33
  I don't know he wants to do it, but I told him What about
• 4:38
  regular garden variety karate where you chop?
• 4:43
  You know what one of my favourite things ever is to see
• 4:45
  like people who are either going to or coming away from karate.
• 4:50
  You know, like just when they're in the street.
• 4:52
  I was in Edinburgh and I saw this kid just walking up the
• 4:55
  road in a karate outfit. And then you see that, you know,
• 4:58
  that belt or whatever, and I think it was like a brown belt
• 5:00
  or something like that. I was like, oh, study on.
• 5:05
  That's a pretty high up belt. I think it is.
• 5:08
  Does it go brown and black? Yeah, it's pre black.
• 5:12
  Yeah, but no Joe Wicks 7 days of sweat.
• 5:16
  But I always just do the first day.
• 5:20
  Yeah, so you get it gets harder as the week goes on.
• 5:23
  You're meant to do 7 days but I do one and then wake up the next
• 5:29
  day. If I'm really tired I don't do
• 5:31
  it again, but then I go back to the first day but.
• 5:34
  Oh wait, I thought you meant John Wick.
• 5:36
  So shit. That'll be good as well.
• 5:39
  John Wick has. That workout, Yeah.
• 5:41
  Yeah. So Joe.
• 5:46
  Joe Wicks. Did you do that during COVID?
• 5:49
  Did you? Were you doing the COVID
• 5:51
  workouts? Yeah.
• 5:53
  Did you do that? No.
• 5:54
  Louis Through did that. Oh.
• 5:56
  Nice. He would, wouldn't he?
• 5:58
  Yeah, he does all the. Right.
• 6:00
  I think he was. I'm not sure about that.
• 6:03
  He was. He was big on Joe Wick's COVID
• 6:08
  series. No, John, I only saw.
• 6:11
  I mean, I only saw. One of them.
• 6:15
  John Wick for the first time the other night.
• 6:18
  Pretty good, yeah, Yeah. I could.
• 6:22
  I could follow it. Yeah.
• 6:23
  Like my brain. I don't know what's wrong with
• 6:27
  it. I haven't spoken to anyone about
• 6:31
  it. Your brain?
• 6:32
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 6:32
  OK. You know, I know that you can go
• 6:34
  and speak to people, and people talk about getting diagnosed
• 6:38
  with all sorts of stuff. Everybody.
• 6:40
  'S got something wrong with their.
• 6:41
  Brain Yeah, I think they have. Yeah.
• 6:44
  You've seen the amount of like crevices in the brain.
• 6:46
  It's like. There's a lot of shit that can
• 6:48
  fall in there. Yeah, and get stuck in there and
• 6:53
  yeah, I just like I when I when I'm reading stuff, I just can't.
• 6:59
  Someone was saying the other day about their they get they bought
• 7:03
  their child as a particular type of glasses and it kind of took
• 7:08
  away their dyslexia. I've heard about that, yeah.
• 7:12
  So yeah, maybe, maybe I'll do that, but I can't concentrate on
• 7:16
  books and films. I struggle with if the if the
• 7:20
  plot is. The like the matrix.
• 7:23
  If it's tough straight away I'll just lose it.
• 7:27
  Whereas John. Wick, it's simple.
• 7:30
  And I, I was on top of it, yeah, you know, because the people who
• 7:35
  who was there was 1 station in that film where he's fighting
• 7:38
  people in a nightclub and all the baddies have got a red shirt
• 7:42
  on. I'm like, this is they're
• 7:46
  spelling it out. And then he goes into another
• 7:48
  room, I think, and all the buddies have got a white shirt
• 7:51
  on. I'm like, I'm enjoying it.
• 7:53
  That's right. Otherwise, you go, who's
• 7:55
  fighting who? Yeah, which was like, that's
• 7:59
  like memento or something like that.
• 8:01
  I'm not interested. Oh memento is so difficult.
• 8:04
  Really difficult, isn't it? Yeah, but some people love it
• 8:09
  and I think, you know, I maybe it's just something to do with
• 8:13
  focus. Yeah, I think it's focusing.
• 8:17
  Yeah, but you thought you were telling me to focus, son.
• 8:19
  Please focus. Yeah, focus.
• 8:25
  I give tips while we're interviewing.
• 8:28
  Yeah. Focus, please.
• 8:30
  Wait, why do you think that is? Like you focus on other things
• 8:34
  though. Like you're like, say you're
• 8:36
  doing stand up. You focus on your set.
• 8:38
  Yeah. And mainly, yeah, yeah,
• 8:41
  definitely the words. I've try and get the words
• 8:46
  sorted out but maybe? You're not interested in.
• 8:50
  Other people's ideas. Yeah.
• 8:52
  Yeah, unless, you know, if you want me to pay attention to what
• 8:58
  you've got to say, you've got to make it really simple because
• 9:01
  I've got too much going on. What?
• 9:04
  Was the last movie that really captured your attention, do you
• 9:08
  think? Did you see Jurassic World?
• 9:11
  Which one? The first one.
• 9:12
  No, this is the one that just came out.
• 9:15
  With Scarlett Johansson in it. Yeah, I.
• 9:17
  Haven't seen, Yeah, yeah, I've only seen the adverts on the
• 9:19
  side of the buses. OK.
• 9:21
  Is the rock in that? No, he should be.
• 9:25
  Wait, is he? Kenny's going to look it up.
• 9:29
  He looks. Everything.
• 9:30
  Oh, he's in Jumanji. Yeah.
• 9:32
  Oh, the remake of Jumanji. Yeah.
• 9:33
  Yeah. No, I've never seen it.
• 9:35
  Yeah. The last film that.
• 9:37
  I mean, we also watched BlackBerry last night.
• 9:42
  That that was the reason I said that.
• 9:44
  I've been watching. Business.
• 9:46
  Businesses and patents, we were talking about.
• 9:49
  Pay. Yes, we were talking.
• 9:50
  About why business? What is it about?
• 9:52
  Are you like? No, not at all.
• 9:54
  It's just those two. They're both available on a
• 9:58
  streaming service. Steve Jobs That 1 is good.
• 10:03
  Yeah, that is good, isn't it? Yeah, Yeah.
• 10:05
  I mean, I like a lot of, I like Steve Jobs is some of his quotes
• 10:15
  fantastic. Aren't they?
• 10:15
  Like particularly like the one about once you realise, I mean,
• 10:24
  this is not the correct quote. But when he says something like
• 10:27
  once you realise that everything in the world has been made-up by
• 10:31
  a person who is no smarter than you, it kind of frees you up a
• 10:34
  bit. But you know, there are quite a
• 10:37
  few people who are quite a bit Spartan than me.
• 10:40
  But I did like, I do think about that like everything's just been
• 10:44
  made, made by humans, so. Exactly.
• 10:48
  It can't be that. No, no.
• 10:51
  I know there's some very, very smart people around, but.
• 10:55
  They put their pants on 2 legs at a time, just like everybody.
• 10:59
  Else, I saw a quote from Rick Mayo the other day that said
• 11:04
  don't take authority too seriously.
• 11:06
  You know, I never took it too seriously and I was much better
• 11:09
  off for it, much better for it, you know, And it's like I spent
• 11:13
  so much time worrying about. Well, we have hang ups.
• 11:20
  We have hang ups that block ourselves.
• 11:23
  Yeah. Because it's like it took me a
• 11:25
  while just to understand about doing something you wanted to do
• 11:31
  as opposed to what you thought other people wanted you to do.
• 11:36
  It just takes. Like in like Morgan Freeman at
• 11:39
  the end of Shawshank. When he's, when he's, he's just
• 11:43
  like, sign your little form mate, whatever.
• 11:46
  I know. And then you thought he was
• 11:48
  going to kill himself just like the other guy, remember?
• 11:53
  And then he decided no. I never thought Morgan Freeman
• 11:58
  was going to kill himself in Xiao Xang.
• 12:00
  You didn't. OK, well that's what they wanted
• 12:04
  you to think. Can I read out some?
• 12:10
  Can I look? I did some stuff here.
• 12:12
  Oh. OK, you brought stuff.
• 12:14
  You're the. 1st I did. I did some research.
• 12:16
  Yeah, it's not me. Kenny, are you buzzing?
• 12:22
  No. Oh, OK.
• 12:23
  I can't be buzzing. I don't have.
• 12:24
  There's no signal there, is there?
• 12:26
  No, I don't think so. Is it me?
• 12:31
  OK, God. Damn it.
• 12:34
  It's an Amber Alert that's not funny by the.
• 12:40
  Way I turn that off, I turn that off you.
• 12:42
  Do. You know, no, that everyone was
• 12:44
  meant to get a siren yesterday, but.
• 12:46
  Yes, I got 1. What did it sound like?
• 12:49
  Was it loud? Pretty loud.
• 12:52
  I just thought I don't want the fingers in my phone, you know
• 12:55
  what I mean? It's like you can turn it off.
• 12:57
  Oh, you can. But imagine if you're in a
• 12:59
  football stadium or something and it goes off.
• 13:01
  We're getting intimate. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 13:06
  That would be, you know, what we're going to do now.
• 13:10
  Totally ruins it. Yeah.
• 13:12
  Yeah. So what did you bring?
• 13:15
  I'm just impressed. What was Saint Alban's school in
• 13:20
  Washington like? Oh, you're, you're asking me
• 13:23
  question. Well, there were a lot of
• 13:25
  political kids there. Musa.
• 13:27
  Yeah, yeah. But it was very interesting
• 13:30
  school, yeah. Massachusetts, known for its
• 13:34
  academic excellence. Well, they have a lot of schools
• 13:38
  there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was.
• 13:40
  My dad was in the Air Force, so we moved.
• 13:42
  Around. Oh, really?
• 13:43
  Yeah, the official language of Massachusetts.
• 13:48
  Is Massachusetts. English.
• 13:51
  Yes, yes, Pilgrim English. Yeah, 1639, America's first post
• 13:57
  office opened in Boston. It did OK.
• 14:01
  I didn't know that. That's interesting.
• 14:04
  Can I just say this, you've got a degree in government.
• 14:10
  Yeah. Have you?
• 14:11
  Yeah. What What did you study in
• 14:14
  school? Graphic design.
• 14:16
  Oh, that's good though. You can use that.
• 14:19
  I can't go. Do you need some good government
• 14:22
  today? No, but when?
• 14:24
  So before you chose government, did you?
• 14:30
  What did you do before that? Well, I just studied different
• 14:35
  things. And then you have to declare a
• 14:37
  major. Yeah.
• 14:38
  Yeah. But I thought that would be good
• 14:40
  for law school, which it wasn't. I mean, you could take anything
• 14:43
  and go to law school, but for some reason I thought I got to
• 14:47
  take government or something like that.
• 14:49
  That's what I was talking about earlier.
• 14:51
  Like, you're not doing what you want, you're doing what you
• 14:54
  think. Yeah.
• 14:56
  Yeah. And I, I still think that with
• 15:03
  comedy, people say that their breakthrough comes when you stop
• 15:07
  caring about what people. Yes.
• 15:10
  And I don't know. I mean I've done 11 shows now,
• 15:18
  like 11 different hours. In a row, right?
• 15:23
  Apart from the pandemic and it's amazing, but the first one was
• 15:28
  like all about the colour yellow and I wasn't really that
• 15:30
  bothered about the old. So it was, I still treated it as
• 15:34
  like an art project really. And that's good.
• 15:39
  You weren't thinking about it. No, no.
• 15:42
  But that made me think I should have had my breakthrough 11
• 15:45
  years ago in my first show when I'm like, Oh yes, I don't care
• 15:49
  about the audience, come on, this is going to go great.
• 15:51
  But. See, now your audiences are
• 15:53
  getting bigger and then when you do your next show, just don't
• 15:57
  think about it too much. Yeah.
• 16:00
  Right. Yeah, like, what about
• 16:01
  auditions? Have you ever done an audition
• 16:04
  and the one that you really cared about you didn't get, but
• 16:06
  the one you go, oh, fuck this. Yeah, I'll just have everything.
• 16:11
  But do you, do you think that you can intentionally go, I'm
• 16:15
  not bothered about this and it's still work.
• 16:17
  It's got to be genuine, like apathy, hasn't it?
• 16:20
  Yeah. I no, there's a director that I
• 16:24
  well, it, it was and it was this part that was like a very, very,
• 16:29
  very small part. And I thought, Oh yeah, I'd love
• 16:32
  to get that. It was just someone talking into
• 16:34
  a phone when someone else was walking down the corridor.
• 16:38
  And I don't even know if you'd see my face.
• 16:41
  And I went into the room and I was really excited about meeting
• 16:44
  this guy. And I thought, this is like
• 16:47
  such, such a small part. What can I do to get a bit more
• 16:53
  chatting? Yeah, yeah.
• 16:54
  And I'd just been to buy a new pan for cooking, you know, and I
• 17:02
  bought a tomato knife. Just for tomatoes, yeah, OK.
• 17:10
  Have you ever used one? No.
• 17:12
  Well, it's like a serrated small serrated knife.
• 17:16
  Those are sharp. Yeah, they're really sharp.
• 17:18
  Yeah, but it's like, but they don't look sharp.
• 17:20
  They're really deceptive. So it's like it's got a like a
• 17:23
  smooth groove on it and then you just put your go like that and
• 17:27
  like you're in straight away. And he said, what's a tomato
• 17:31
  knife? And I thought, OK, yeah, we've
• 17:34
  had a good chat about pans, spoke to him about tomato knife.
• 17:38
  Did I get the part? No.
• 17:40
  Why I? Just thought I was maybe.
• 17:43
  You think you went into too much detail?
• 17:45
  Maybe I took too much of his time You.
• 17:48
  Know. I I locked the door.
• 17:50
  I was like, mate, I've got this smart enough.
• 17:52
  Come on, give us a part. But you've.
• 17:54
  Been in movies before, right? I've ever been in a movie.
• 17:59
  Do you do you feel like you you like to talk to the director?
• 18:03
  Like who? Am I?
• 18:04
  No, no, no, not at all. No.
• 18:06
  I'll do exactly what people want me to do.
• 18:08
  Yeah, yeah. I was in one movie that was
• 18:15
  called Marching Powder with Danny Dyer.
• 18:18
  Oh nice. And that was his latest film
• 18:21
  with Nick Love when I had a small part in that.
• 18:26
  But the bigger my we're going. To put that up there when yeah,
• 18:29
  you. Say the bigger my beard grows,
• 18:31
  the more parts I get for being a homeless person.
• 18:36
  Oh, really? Yeah, which is like, maybe.
• 18:41
  No, it's got nothing to do with how much it grows.
• 18:42
  My picture on the spotlight or whatever is me with quite a big
• 18:48
  beard, so. But I don't like having a big
• 18:52
  beard all the time, you know? What if you just shaved it?
• 18:55
  Another picture in there. Well, this is it.
• 18:58
  But that's one of the things that I find quite jarring about
• 19:04
  acting. It's like you've got to have
• 19:06
  like a buyable face, like a buyable thing.
• 19:09
  Yeah, so many people. People are looking for a look,
• 19:12
  aren't they? Yeah, So.
• 19:15
  And that's completely fine. And that's what people should be
• 19:18
  doing. That's what I'd be doing if I
• 19:19
  was a director. Look at this guy.
• 19:21
  He looks like that. Oh, no, he doesn't.
• 19:23
  He shaved his beard off. Oh well, he's here for the
• 19:25
  audition. I get it.
• 19:26
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 19:27
  Well, you'd be good for a lot of things besides homeless.
• 19:31
  I thought so an. Intellectual.
• 19:33
  I think so. Why am I talking about myself?
• 19:35
  Some mediaeval knight. Well, I did that in a.
• 19:39
  Businessman. It seems like an.
• 19:41
  Alternative business. Well, I was just in Pret,
• 19:44
  actually, and I saw these three guys come in.
• 19:48
  It was lunchtime and they all had white shirts on, the same
• 19:52
  trousers, pretty much the same colour shoes.
• 19:55
  Yeah. And I just love flipping act
• 19:59
  these like you see people in there.
• 20:03
  Bastards. I know I would.
• 20:05
  I'd love that looks. They look like they've got some
• 20:08
  stable stuff going on. Do you know what I mean?
• 20:10
  I think like. Seriously stable.
• 20:12
  They've got they probably know what they're going to be doing
• 20:15
  in six months. Oh.
• 20:17
  And and. They booked their flights.
• 20:20
  They've got stuff sorted. They'll probably, they'll
• 20:22
  probably go away on holiday to, you know, with other people who
• 20:28
  were also going to prep on the lunchtime.
• 20:30
  And like I just because I used to, I used to work in
• 20:35
  advertising. You did.
• 20:36
  Yeah, from like when I when I finished.
• 20:40
  Were you a copywriter? Yeah, just like a creative.
• 20:43
  Oh, nice, nice. Like a Jon Hamm.
• 20:46
  I basically just wanted to did graphic design and that was very
• 20:49
  much like an ideas based course. Yeah.
• 20:51
  So you just had to like, you got a brief and then you had to try
• 20:57
  to answer the brief in a creative way.
• 20:59
  I love that stuff. It was awesome and like where I
• 21:02
  went to uni and Newcastle, they had all these massive printing
• 21:05
  presses and like all lone lino. So it was, it was amazing.
• 21:11
  And at school art was the thing that I loved the most.
• 21:13
  Like and and then eventually I got into advertising because I
• 21:18
  thought advertising looked like such a fantastic place.
• 21:21
  It's a combination of art and business.
• 21:24
  Yeah, yeah. But it's not a place for an
• 21:27
  artist or someone who considers themselves to be like it.
• 21:32
  It at the end of the day, it is a business.
• 21:34
  Yeah, yeah. And for for me, it's more about
• 21:38
  problem solving. Like you've got to have a
• 21:39
  problem solving type of brain. You can't just be going off on
• 21:43
  one and like all the time because it doesn't work.
• 21:48
  Did you do stand up when you were doing?
• 21:50
  No, no. But it was the reason I got into
• 21:54
  it was because I was so alive. I had a notebook for like my
• 22:02
  advertising. And then I had another notebook
• 22:06
  where I'd just go off and vent and just be like, I fucking hate
• 22:09
  this stuff, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 22:11
  Why can't I just do what I want to do?
• 22:13
  And just like that? Absolutely.
• 22:15
  And just like, I felt such a sense of freedom in these
• 22:18
  notebooks. I was like, no one can tell me
• 22:20
  what to do in these notebooks. And like, I can draw anything.
• 22:23
  I can write anything. I absolutely loved it.
• 22:26
  And then one day the creative director said I'm, I'm, I'm
• 22:31
  having a fireworks party and there's going to be a bit of
• 22:33
  poetry. And because he he's.
• 22:39
  Who does that? Amazing.
• 22:41
  And I'd been sending. This was the thing when you
• 22:44
  know, people talk about luck. I'd been, I moved on to London
• 22:50
  thinking I'm just going to send off some books of short stories
• 22:55
  that I'd written to advertising companies and like make the
• 22:58
  covers really nice with like tracing paper and and just
• 23:02
  sending there's ideas in these. Yeah, advertising companies like
• 23:06
  ideas, of course. Let's see if anyone likes this.
• 23:10
  And then, but they would just not get back to me at all.
• 23:13
  I sent off, I spent so much time like handwriting them all and
• 23:16
  sending emails and no one got back to me whatsoever.
• 23:19
  And then my dad phoned me up and said he's a, he wasn't a
• 23:23
  plumber. Well, he's, he's a plumber,
• 23:25
  right? He's retired now.
• 23:28
  But he said where he buys his plumbing pipes from and his
• 23:32
  equipment, He must have been in there talking about me.
• 23:37
  And then the person who worked there said my brother-in-law
• 23:41
  runs a advertising company in London.
• 23:43
  Why don't you you get him to send his stuff in?
• 23:46
  And then I did. Just him.
• 23:47
  He runs it. No, it was like he he was like
• 23:49
  one of the the head people there.
• 23:51
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And and then I sent in my I made
• 23:56
  ACV that was like it was a cartoon strip.
• 24:02
  And I put conversation, I put conversation at the top of it
• 24:06
  with the C big and the vivic. So CV.
• 24:09
  And then it was just a conversation between like, me
• 24:13
  and a pig go in and the pig's going like, why do you want to
• 24:16
  work in advertising? It's the best.
• 24:18
  And I thought, I thought so. And then I was like, oh, God,
• 24:23
  come on, someone please. And then?
• 24:25
  Someone get my big conversation. But, and but the creative
• 24:29
  director did, yeah, a guy called Martin Galton who was, he did
• 24:34
  like some of the first ever, like good Levi's adverts.
• 24:37
  And he was a quite a big dog in advertising and did like some of
• 24:41
  the his amazing art director and painter and artist and did some
• 24:45
  of the first like drum breaking Haagen Dazs adverts and stuff
• 24:49
  like that. And he had been running this
• 24:53
  poetry night called Bang Said the Gun and then his house.
• 25:00
  Well, they did it. They actually did it in the
• 25:01
  Bowery Ballroom in New York. Once oh, I've been there and we
• 25:05
  did the boost there. Yeah, really.
• 25:08
  And then they did it. They did it.
• 25:09
  I think they did it somewhere on maybe like German St somewhere
• 25:13
  and then, but then, yeah, in German Germany St.
• 25:17
  And they said, and then anyway, they'd been having a break or
• 25:20
  whatever, and then I did that. Fireworks.
• 25:25
  He said, do you want to? No, let's go back to it.
• 25:27
  So I'd been filling up these notebooks.
• 25:30
  He came and said, I'm having a fireworks party at my house.
• 25:33
  There's going to be a bit of poetry.
• 25:35
  And I said, oh, I've been writing some stuff down.
• 25:37
  I don't know if it's poetry or not, but do you think I could
• 25:39
  read it out? I was like, it was one of those
• 25:41
  things where. Ants.
• 25:42
  Yeah, and I don't know why. I just felt.
• 25:45
  Were you slam people? Not yet.
• 25:48
  Just slagging off advertising the whole time.
• 25:49
  No, it was just stuff that, I don't know, something made me
• 25:55
  think there was something in it. I think there was.
• 25:57
  I would print off. I'd write stuff up on the
• 26:00
  computers in the advertising office.
• 26:05
  And I remember I did this piece that was all about the moon
• 26:12
  being the new face of the British National Party, right?
• 26:17
  And how people get annoyed when the moon gets taken over by
• 26:23
  darkness is through the moon cycle.
• 26:26
  And then the people would be like, this is what's happening
• 26:29
  to our country. Do you know what I mean?
• 26:31
  Like say it so that so the moon is a new face for the British
• 26:35
  National Party. And then all the racist people
• 26:37
  are getting annoyed because of the shadow coming over the moon.
• 26:40
  Whatever. And I saw someone pick it up on
• 26:45
  the photocopier and read it and go like, whoa.
• 26:50
  And that react, that reaction, the reaction I, I thought, oh,
• 26:55
  there's something that I, I was like, oh, that maybe there was
• 27:00
  something in it. I, I just like that idea of the
• 27:03
  moon being the new face of the British National Party and it,
• 27:06
  and there'd been something in it, you know?
• 27:08
  Also, that was a pristine idea you just wrote down off.
• 27:12
  Of yeah, yeah, yeah. But this is that was such a
• 27:16
  those pristine ideas where you, you like, you know, there was
• 27:22
  another one was like, if I had a pen for a penis, I'd write all
• 27:25
  over your face. I'd use your spots as
• 27:27
  punctuation. Not one blemish would I waste.
• 27:29
  If it was all right with you, I'd fill your mouth with ink and
• 27:31
  use it as a quill. So when we got to restaurants, I
• 27:34
  could indecently sign the bill. And I'd be like.
• 27:37
  Print someone's reading it. What is that?
• 27:40
  And then do. You think subconsciously you
• 27:42
  left it so that they would read it.
• 27:44
  No, I don't know. I I just, but it was just, I
• 27:48
  don't know. It's those.
• 27:50
  That's my favourite. That's great though.
• 27:53
  Think about the just trying to get stuff out of your head onto
• 27:58
  a bit of paper as quick as you can.
• 28:00
  Yeah, yeah. So there's as little
• 28:02
  interference as possible. And then just like throwing the
• 28:08
  dice of it and going, oh, that's, that's a good one or
• 28:12
  that's a bad one. And then just not really ever
• 28:15
  knowing. That's one of the things that I
• 28:17
  find hardest about stand up is that sometimes I have an idea
• 28:21
  and think, oh, love that. That's going to go well.
• 28:25
  And then it just doesn't. And then you have another idea
• 28:28
  and you're like, well, and then that, yeah, you go.
• 28:31
  Really. That one, you know?
• 28:33
  Yeah, you just. Can't.
• 28:34
  There's no way of knowing. Yeah, there's some that you try
• 28:37
  to hammer home, because this is good, and it never seems to work
• 28:42
  if you keep. Hammering maybe that goes back
• 28:44
  to the audition thing of just being like, just Chuck it out
• 28:48
  there and. And then I think that I read a
• 28:50
  thing in Stuart Lee's book where he's on about audiences being
• 28:53
  like cats, where if you pretend that you're not interested, they
• 28:56
  come up and they allow your legs and like and the.
• 29:02
  Yeah, so then I so. What about this poetry thing?
• 29:06
  Well, yeah, I did the gig on the garden wall.
• 29:10
  I stood up on his garden wall and there was a fight.
• 29:12
  There was fireworks and there was a bit of poetry.
• 29:15
  And I was saying stuff like I had a flatmate called Nigel who
• 29:19
  lived in a shell. I guess that means that I did as
• 29:22
  well as which was not, you know, it's not my best stuff.
• 29:25
  But at the start. And they were like, yeah, no,
• 29:30
  not really, not really that bothered by it.
• 29:34
  But there was, there was enough stuff for me to feel.
• 29:37
  How long did? You go How long was your?
• 29:39
  I think maybe it was 10 minutes, maybe even like 7, and it it
• 29:46
  didn't go that well, but it went well enough for me to feel good
• 29:52
  about it. Yeah, it gave me hope and hope.
• 29:56
  Did anybody else go up? Yeah, so Martin did some and
• 30:00
  then Dan Cockrell did this other person from Banks of the Gun and
• 30:03
  a girl called Shanika. They were running it and it was.
• 30:06
  And I, I'd love to think of it as like a lightning striking
• 30:14
  type of thing where my life was just made from that moment, but
• 30:17
  it just wasn't that at all. It was like I tried something
• 30:20
  and it went well enough for me to have gone.
• 30:25
  I want to do that again. And that's, that's such an
• 30:28
  important thing, isn't it? To go.
• 30:30
  I'd like to do that again, even if it's like an audition and you
• 30:33
  go, God, that was horrible. But I don't, yeah, they haven't
• 30:40
  got to me. They haven't killed me.
• 30:42
  And I feel that way about audiences a lot.
• 30:45
  Like I've had some shocking gigs, but never bad enough for
• 30:54
  me to not be like laughing about it in the morning or like just
• 30:58
  annoyed in kind of a weird way. Well, some people would quit
• 31:03
  over something like that, which means they have a soft exterior
• 31:09
  or, you know, they quit very easily.
• 31:11
  But you, my friend, you're hard as nails.
• 31:18
  I feel, you know, like I do, honestly, Gee, I don't know if
• 31:22
  you get this, like when you do comedy or stand up in front of
• 31:28
  an audience, yes, I do feel like it does toughen you up.
• 31:33
  Yeah, but I feel like I could lead people into battle in an
• 31:39
  army situation. Yeah.
• 31:40
  Like, I'm not as scared as I used to be.
• 31:42
  No, that might sound flippant. And I know that you'll need a
• 31:45
  lot of training to lead people into battle, but I I would be
• 31:48
  like, come on, what's going to happen?
• 31:50
  But, well, we could die. Yeah.
• 31:53
  That's how I feel when I go on stage.
• 31:55
  Yeah, exactly. And it's like.
• 31:56
  I've died many times. I've died many times.
• 32:00
  It's different, you know, with war and everything like that,
• 32:03
  but. It's a little bit like golf,
• 32:07
  too. They say you hit a bunch of bad
• 32:09
  shots, bad shot, You hit that one sweet shot and you want to
• 32:14
  go back. Yeah, kids should come.
• 32:17
  Yeah. And I've, I love golf.
• 32:20
  And you do. Yeah, yeah.
• 32:21
  Oh wow. I used to play all the time when
• 32:24
  I was younger. I can't, can't.
• 32:26
  I don't get to play as much anymore.
• 32:27
  But yeah, those. I was never particularly
• 32:31
  brilliant, but I had enough good shots.
• 32:34
  They're in my brain. It's like jokes and it's.
• 32:37
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They make those good.
• 32:40
  I could still think about them, which is kind of a pathetic
• 32:44
  thing. But I think it's important to
• 32:47
  have things in your brain that you like and you keep going back
• 32:52
  to. And because it can, can just
• 32:56
  like make you feel all right. And I've got enough bad stuff in
• 33:01
  there that makes me feel like crap if there's a few things
• 33:06
  rattling around in there that I can think about.
• 33:09
  Hold on to. Yeah, you've got to hold on to
• 33:11
  those things, whether it's like a even, you know, talking about
• 33:14
  Edinburgh, like conversations when you bump into someone in
• 33:18
  Edinburgh and like you're talking for half an hour on top
• 33:21
  of a bin or something and you're like, oh, like you've both got
• 33:24
  your elbows on a bin and you're like, oh, God, this is just
• 33:28
  how's it been stuff. Yeah.
• 33:30
  Like, how's it been going? Oh, yeah, no, it's last night.
• 33:32
  It was brutal. Yesterday was good.
• 33:34
  And it's just like this up down type of thing.
• 33:36
  But this thing of just persistence, like the guy in the
• 33:42
  founder Michael Keaton, and he's going, persistence is just key,
• 33:47
  you know, And I've just come back from Edinburgh.
• 33:50
  Yeah. How was that?
• 33:51
  I was going to ask you. It was.
• 33:54
  It's just such a. Mad.
• 33:57
  It's a scene. It's a scene, it's a bubble,
• 34:00
  it's a tornado and you're in the eye.
• 34:02
  It's just insane. And then it's done.
• 34:05
  But you went in. Let me refer to my notes.
• 34:09
  Tell me about modern problems in science.
• 34:14
  Oh, that's when I first. 1994, yeah.
• 34:17
  There's three guys. Yeah.
• 34:19
  And we improvised a university lecture, and we each played
• 34:23
  professors. So we go, we we go to the
• 34:26
  audience. We need an absurd scientific
• 34:29
  hypothesis. Yeah.
• 34:31
  And they'd say something like the Earth is shaped like a giant
• 34:35
  burrito. And then you go, OK, we'd write
• 34:38
  it on the board. And then you'd go, I am a
• 34:41
  professor of what? They go gynaecology and we go,
• 34:44
  we need another one. And then they go Egyptology or
• 34:48
  something. And so you would have to be that
• 34:51
  professor of you'd have to teach.
• 34:54
  Cool. Yeah.
• 34:55
  So it caught on because everybody has that classroom
• 34:59
  experience, so and we would get guests sometimes.
• 35:03
  We got Sandy Toxberg once. Really.
• 35:06
  Yeah, it got quite popular. And then you.
• 35:09
  Toured it? Yeah, we toured it did.
• 35:11
  You did. You go to like, Australia, yeah.
• 35:17
  How do you know all this stuff? The Internet?
• 35:22
  No, no, no. So we did this and then, yeah,
• 35:28
  then we split. You can type this into like
• 35:30
  ChatGPT deep dive questions for Rich Horcher and it just comes
• 35:37
  up. Next time, let's do that for
• 35:42
  Rob. But this was it, ChatGPT.
• 35:46
  I did do a lot of other. It's like no question #7 In
• 35:52
  Snuffbox, your chemistry with Matt Berry is its key, is key to
• 35:56
  its success. What's the secret behind such a
• 35:59
  unique and hilarious dynamic? Wait, that's the question that
• 36:04
  you posed? Or.
• 36:05
  No, that that I just typed into Chuck JBT.
• 36:07
  That's mad, isn't it? Isn't that weird?
• 36:10
  So crazy. Yeah, do you find yourself using
• 36:14
  a lot of? No, that I'm, I'm only just
• 36:16
  getting into it. Yeah, but it's one of those
• 36:21
  things it seems like, you know, five years time, will people be
• 36:25
  saying what they won't be? Talking.
• 36:29
  Yeah, like what people actually trusted other people to think.
• 36:34
  Yeah, yeah, for themselves, like with their own brain instead of
• 36:36
  going on to the. I know it's like relying on the
• 36:41
  GPS only for everything. Well, that was one of the things
• 36:46
  when we was watching the BlackBerry film last night.
• 36:49
  I just opened Google Maps and imagine speaking, this is so
• 36:55
  stupid. But talking to someone from the
• 36:59
  when BlackBerry first came out and like showing them Google
• 37:02
  Maps and be like, hey look, you can go to America and look at
• 37:05
  all the streets. Yeah, that was cool.
• 37:07
  I just thought, wow, that was. Just just.
• 37:10
  Ridiculous anyway. Did you have a BlackBerry?
• 37:13
  No, Did you? No, I never got.
• 37:15
  One my first phone was BT Solnet with like a little aerial on it
• 37:20
  and he went the the message tone was he went.
• 37:27
  I loved that Nice. I've got certain memories from
• 37:30
  it, like brings back. When I hear that, it brings back
• 37:34
  a memory of like my first proper relationship because that was
• 37:38
  the tone. That's went off when you know
• 37:41
  what I love you and I what about I love the fact you can watch a
• 37:49
  movie and you can tell what year it was just on the size of the
• 37:53
  phone. Oh yeah.
• 37:55
  Like in Wall Street and stuff, they have, you know, that movie
• 37:58
  Wall Street. Yeah, they've got these huge
• 38:01
  phones. Like you can tell they just came
• 38:04
  out. Yeah, I mean, my dad was
• 38:08
  actually one of the first people to have a mobile phone in a
• 38:11
  satchel in the village where I grew up.
• 38:13
  Oh, and you build it. Yeah, well, it was, it was in
• 38:16
  like it was about the size of what will be a laptop case now.
• 38:21
  But then it had the receiver on it and people, people would
• 38:25
  laugh at it and be like, what are you doing?
• 38:26
  That's never going to take off. Yeah.
• 38:28
  And. Don't jump in the pool with
• 38:31
  that. Well, not exactly.
• 38:33
  You have to stick that in a bag of rice.
• 38:35
  It gets wet. But no, Edinburgh, it's such a
• 38:40
  strange thing. I love.
• 38:41
  I love doing it. Yeah, Yeah.
• 38:43
  And the main thing that I wanted to happen was for my show to be
• 38:47
  better at the end than it was at the start.
• 38:50
  And. And it was, well, pretty much
• 38:53
  the words were pretty much the same, but I'd learn how this is
• 38:56
  the thing. Delivery.
• 38:57
  That's it. Yeah.
• 38:59
  And that's just trial and error and I did like 30 work in
• 39:01
  progresses or something. Like that?
• 39:02
  There's nothing like that. No.
• 39:05
  Where else do you get that? Then?
• 39:07
  A festival where you do it over and.
• 39:10
  But there's just that thing of going.
• 39:13
  I thought that I thought that my words were enough, you know?
• 39:18
  But they aren't. You've got to be like, you've
• 39:21
  got to use your face. Yeah.
• 39:23
  And the different volume. Like ideally I would just be
• 39:27
  able to read out the script and the ideas will be good enough.
• 39:33
  That's the whole package isn't it?
• 39:35
  That's it. And I I'm only just realising
• 39:38
  that so. Are you doing anything with your
• 39:41
  show now? Are you going to do?
• 39:43
  I'm going to tour. I'm touring it next year.
• 39:46
  Soho Theatre. Plug Away.
• 39:49
  Yeah, I'm doing a nationwide tour from January.
• 39:53
  Buy your tickets. Buy your tickets please
• 39:56
  robotson.co.uk. Oh nice, it's on your site.
• 39:59
  Yeah, but and the good thing about doing shows like doing a
• 40:05
  I've done, I've been touring, I've taught the I don't know
• 40:08
  how. Many you like touring, though.
• 40:10
  You're a touring beast. Do I like?
• 40:13
  I do like it, yeah. But there's never.
• 40:17
  I never look forward to. It's not like I'm bouncing off
• 40:21
  the walls when I got on the train, you know, being like, I
• 40:24
  can't wait for this show tonight.
• 40:26
  It's always just like I've got. Impending dread.
• 40:31
  Yeah, approach with caution. Every audience ever.
• 40:35
  You never know. You never know.
• 40:37
  And like last, like when I was doing a gig once in Exeter,
• 40:40
  Exeter, Phoenix. They're great.
• 40:44
  Have you been there? Yeah.
• 40:46
  There was a person on the front row who had a full Five Guys
• 40:48
  meal, burger, chips, milkshake, and I was like trying to do my
• 40:52
  show. Did you call them out?
• 40:54
  Yeah, big time. I just moved it to the middle of
• 40:56
  the stage. It's like you can come and get
• 40:57
  it if you want it too much. I hate that and like.
• 41:02
  Plus it makes you can smell it probably.
• 41:05
  Absolutely, food and food. It's like, please, I get so
• 41:11
  especially in Edinburgh when I've I've got my script, a book
• 41:16
  script like it was, it was. This isn't a lot I know.
• 41:19
  I don't know. For your show.
• 41:21
  Yeah, I'm not good. At you.
• 41:22
  Nice. Are you good at learning lines?
• 41:24
  No, I'm terrible. No same here So.
• 41:26
  Don't talk to me about lines. This was only.
• 41:30
  How many pages? 11 which isn't that many for an
• 41:34
  hour. No, but each page is like what,
• 41:37
  7 minutes? Yeah.
• 41:40
  And I, I was determined to learn it and I was so close on the
• 41:46
  Wednesday when the previous started to to knowing it.
• 41:50
  And then some people said, look, just get rid of the script.
• 41:55
  Yeah. And just kind of, you know it
• 41:59
  enough. Yeah, but I tried it on the
• 42:04
  Thursday and there was these people looking at me and I just
• 42:06
  completely forgot where I was and.
• 42:08
  You know, it's like because you're, you're learning it like
• 42:11
  in a room in a different venue. And then the minute you get
• 42:15
  under lights and then there's people, it's like.
• 42:19
  Yeah. And it was just, it was such A
• 42:24
  to think, you know, some people never put themselves through
• 42:26
  that. But I know it's unnecessary.
• 42:29
  It's unnecessary. I know people put themselves
• 42:32
  through other things in life that are difficult, but for me.
• 42:35
  Marriage. Yeah, that, you know all that,
• 42:38
  but it's like, it's just so it felt like the world was ending
• 42:45
  when I forgot my lines. Oh.
• 42:46
  No. So what did you wind up doing?
• 42:50
  Well, of course you just, you just wing it and then you, you
• 42:53
  get a bit further into the story and then you realise you haven't
• 42:56
  said to keep it here. So then you, you don't know
• 43:00
  what's happening. And then and then after the
• 43:04
  show, I'm a complete wreck and people are like I said, I forgot
• 43:08
  it. I've completely fudged it all.
• 43:10
  And they're like, what are you talking about?
• 43:12
  We all thought that that was how it was meant to be.
• 43:14
  That's one thing I've learned is never like a micro criticise
• 43:20
  your show afterwards because they go what you missed this
• 43:24
  bit. I didn't know that.
• 43:26
  It's like it's more important to you than.
• 43:29
  Totally. And that is even I'm I think
• 43:33
  that's it is even say if you're like, who was it?
• 43:38
  Who was saying like Jerry Seinfeld maybe was saying that
• 43:40
  you get 90 seconds grace or something?
• 43:43
  Oh, as a famous celebrity. Yeah, yeah.
• 43:46
  Oh, like, but what I'm saying is that even people maybe like him,
• 43:54
  he would would he say some was it?
• 43:59
  What's the? Deal.
• 44:00
  Yeah, well, what he say? Like, who was it who said said
• 44:08
  look, never take the audience, never take the audience's never,
• 44:12
  never take the audience's experience away from them.
• 44:16
  So if they come up to you after and say, oh, I love that.
• 44:18
  Don't say, oh, you should have been here yesterday.
• 44:21
  Yes, it was great. Yeah, you.
• 44:23
  It was all right today. You didn't really like it.
• 44:26
  You would have liked. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 44:27
  Three days ago when I took off my pants.
• 44:30
  Yeah. Well, Rob, this is a portion of
• 44:33
  the show. I don't know if you've seen the
• 44:34
  podcast at all. It's award-winning.
• 44:37
  Yeah, it's called fill in the blank.
• 44:43
  Or I read a sentence, you have to fill in the blanks.
• 44:46
  It's sort of like blankety blank.
• 44:48
  Awesome, only not when it comes to blank.
• 44:53
  I don't trust blank. When it comes to when it comes
• 45:05
  to circles, right, I don't trust compasses.
• 45:15
  Yeah, you can never do a perfect circle with a compass.
• 45:19
  That's good. Maybe I do trust comp.
• 45:21
  What's the best answer? Have you ever done that on
• 45:23
  before? No, this is like, like your
• 45:27
  notes, you know, just the top of your head.
• 45:29
  OK? Eating blank is disgusting.
• 45:32
  Absolutely disgusting. Eating pasta is disgusting.
• 45:41
  Then what? Pasta.
• 45:44
  Absolutely disgusting. Was there another blank?
• 45:47
  No, that's actually. I like, I quite like pasta, but
• 45:51
  that was the first thing that came in to Made and I didn't
• 45:53
  want to overthink it. Old pasta is bad.
• 45:56
  I do that. What about ozo pasta?
• 45:59
  Do you like that? You know, like the big rice?
• 46:01
  Yeah. Really good stuff, isn't it?
• 46:04
  Yeah, only I've had it once where I this is when I was not
• 46:08
  clean. What do you mean drugs I.
• 46:12
  Was in school, yeah, universal. Well, you'd get it and then
• 46:16
  eventually there'd be like lice and stuff in a.
• 46:20
  Oh, yeah. What are they called?
• 46:23
  Is it called not? It's not win it or something.
• 46:25
  Maggots. No, once it was a hotel and the
• 46:30
  Muesli had been out for too long and my nephew looked at it and
• 46:34
  he was like, there's stuff moving in this Muesli and my, my
• 46:37
  mum was like, no, there isn't. And then she looked in it and
• 46:40
  there was. So it's like they get him flour
• 46:42
  and stuff like that and I think they must get him pasta.
• 46:46
  It's a certain type of. Bug.
• 46:50
  You should have gotten a free meal.
• 46:52
  Can I get a blank blank question mark?
• 47:02
  Can I get a sparkling water? Yeah, this is the project.
• 47:07
  So like now I would love to be saying words that are funny and
• 47:15
  demonstrate my I'm good. I think you.
• 47:19
  Don't have to be witty or anything.
• 47:22
  OK. It takes more than 10 blanks to
• 47:25
  blank. It takes more than 10 journeys
• 47:40
  to die. That's pretty good.
• 47:43
  I like that. Oh yeah, because no one knows
• 47:46
  how big a journey is. A journey could be, you know,
• 47:50
  10. How many journeys do you do in
• 47:52
  your lifetime? Podcast could be a journey.
• 47:54
  Exactly, Yeah. Last question, Yeah, I you're
• 47:58
  probably glad it's the last question, right?
• 48:01
  Yeah, I blank way too much comma, so I've decided to blank.
• 48:12
  I eat way too much, so I've decided to fast.
• 48:18
  Yeah, you were the body double for Garth in Wayneville, too.
• 48:24
  For Wayne. For Wayne.
• 48:26
  Yes, that's OK. You were the body double for
• 48:31
  Wayne I. Got to dress up as I was signing
• 48:33
  autographs as him. Really.
• 48:36
  Yeah. Because people would come up to
• 48:37
  me. Really.
• 48:38
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 48:39
  How cool is that? Well, because we were on
• 48:41
  location and we were the only crew there.
• 48:45
  It was in Chicago and I was dressed as him.
• 48:49
  And then they would go, hey man, can I get your autograph?
• 48:53
  And then I'd just sign it and stuff, really.
• 48:56
  Otherwise I'd go, I'm not him and they get mad at me.
• 48:59
  Yeah. So you have to cap on.
• 49:01
  Yeah. And the wig and everything.
• 49:03
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there was a Garth double
• 49:05
  with me. What's that?
• 49:06
  And we, so we did the Bohemian Rhapsody thing when we were.
• 49:11
  I got to drive the pacer. Did you?
• 49:13
  Yeah. Whoa.
• 49:15
  It was such a cool experience. Yeah, that's awesome.
• 49:18
  Yeah. But I want to end with something
• 49:20
  to do with you. You're doing your tour.
• 49:24
  This is your last plug. You're doing your tour.
• 49:27
  Yeah. Roboton.com.co.uk.
• 49:31
  Dot co.uk, I'm doing my tour and yeah, it's called CAN.
• 49:39
  Story of a man called Can. It's about a motivational
• 49:43
  speaker that I made-up. I love it.
• 49:47
  Yeah, 50% of crows die within their first year of life due to
• 49:51
  competing flocks, starvation and predators.
• 49:54
  Doesn't that make you feel like you've done well to keep
• 49:56
  yourself alive for as long as you have?
• 49:58
  Life ain't easy. Hello.
• 50:01
  See if that's yeah exactly. That's the stuff that you would
• 50:05
  see. But no, I you know I would.
• 50:08
  What about? Can I talk to you about this?
• 50:11
  OK. Upright Citizens Brigade, Yes.
• 50:16
  Were you in up with Amy Poehler? I.
• 50:18
  Wasn't in specifically with her. They did shows early on and we
• 50:22
  did a show called The Secret of Happiness.
• 50:27
  Right. And I would I played a host like
• 50:31
  a motivational speaker. Oh, did you?
• 50:33
  Yeah. But what we would do was we'd
• 50:36
  say the whole show, the secret of happiness is in this box.
• 50:41
  Yeah. And we would do a lot of stuff
• 50:44
  in the show and at at the end of the show we got everybody to
• 50:47
  come out of the theatre and we said we're going to read to you
• 50:51
  what the secret of happiness is. And then we'd have a car come by
• 50:56
  and we'd, we'd the secret of happiness is don't be a sucker.
• 51:02
  And it was filled with biscuits. And we'd throw the biscuits at
• 51:05
  the audience and the car would drive by and we'd get in and
• 51:08
  drive off. Well, that would be the end,
• 51:11
  yeah. Oh cool.
• 51:13
  So that's what I'm going to do now, yeah.
• 51:16
  No, get out the biscuits. That was interesting, thank you
• 51:22
  for watching. I hope you enjoyed it.
• 51:25
  And listen, guys, if you have any questions, because Rob asked
• 51:31
  me a bunch of questions, why don't you ask some questions in
• 51:34
  the comments and I'll try to answer them on the pod.
• 51:39
  Isn't that a good way of interacting with people?
• 51:44
  Yeah, OK. We're a family, right?
• 51:49
  OK, bye. Rich vultures talk box.