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Tom Sizemore IS Bottom Feeder (Promo) · Movie Meltdown

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: All right, are.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: You ready for the movie threat? Sure. This was just
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: like a week or so ago, and I was like,
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: I already know what movie we're doing this week. But
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: I didn't know for sure where we were going until
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: I ran across Hellgirl. Now in the top, you may
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: not have noticed, it says starring Tom Sizemore.
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: Jesus Christ.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: So, let's see. What the hell?
• 0:45
  Speaker 4: I don't think I can handle any more low-rate Tom
• 0:48
  Speaker 4: Sizemore horror movies.
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: Let's see.
• 0:51
  Speaker 4: That poor bastard.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: A team of ghost hunters must set aside their quick
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: buck party ways. Think about that. When they discover that
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: one of their own is the offspring of the demonic
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: entity haunting their latest job.
• 1:08
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: Starring Tom Sark. As Hell Girl.
• 1:17
  Speaker 5: Where did they find that picture of me for the cover?
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: I mean, she's very demonic. So, yes, it might be.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: Let's see who else. Let me zoom in and see
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: the rest of our stellar cast here. It is Jai Head.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Is that a word even?
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: J-A-E.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: You said it, therefore it's a word.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: Is the first name.
• 1:39
  Speaker 5: Head.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: Stellar cast, as I said. Tara Westwood. You know, your
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: favorite actress, Tara Westwood.
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: Sure.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: Time Sizemore.
• 1:49
  Speaker 5: And.
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Carrington Payne.
• 1:53
  Speaker 5: Oh, that's a name.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Is it?
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: It's spelled funky. It's K-H-E-R-I-N-T-O-N.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: Carrington. Carrington.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: You better be fancy with that kind of name. So, Hellgirl,
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: that's what we could be watching next time around, but
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: hopefully somebody out there listening to this We'll realize that's
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: not what we really want, other than we want to
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: see this cool picture of Nora here. But the movie itself,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: I don't know if it's going to hold up. So
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: hopefully you will be like, oh, I know of a
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: much better movie they could watch. And then you'll join
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: the Meltdown Horror Club and give us a better movie
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: than Hellgirl, starring and or in the titular role Tom Sizemore,
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: who I guess is Hellgirl.
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: Or you can even give us a movie that's as
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: bad or worse than Hellgirl.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: We're clearly not picky. Because this was my first one
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I ran across. Yesterday I was out once again looking
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: for more crap. I found another Tom Sizemore movie that
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: I will save for a future one of these. Because, yes,
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: there's so many. Tom Sizemore got hard up for cash.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: So we'll cover that in this week's episode. But, yeah,
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: there's a lot of cheesy movies you've never heard of
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: starring a bunch of random ass people. And Tom Sizemore.
• 3:14
  Speaker 5: Okay, well.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, yeah.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: But if you don't, you know, we'll end up with Hellgirl.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: And then we'll have Tom Slally's more comments like this.
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: Is there anything more adorable than a person growing a pumpkin.
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: Patch out of spike?
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: That's kind of my reason.
• 3:33
  Speaker 4: Which is what I feel like the girl did after
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: they mowed everything.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, because they mowed down everything on this side.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: But her side was still kind of in her, like,
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: garden area, which they technically, I guess, aren't supposed to
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: be messing with. So she specifically built it up and
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: got super excited and had several pumpkins, way more than
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: even showed up over here, really.
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: I want to meet this woman, but at the same time,
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: I'm afraid, too, that it would spoil the magic. Kind of.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: Because I only see her every once in a while,
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, hey, how's it going? And that's about it.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, we should probably leave.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: It at that.
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: Because I'm picturing the kindest, sweetest, most pure-hearted person who
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: also bakes people into cookies.
• 4:11
  Speaker 5: Because ultimately I have a 12-step plan to attract crows,
• 4:15
  Speaker 5: train them, and make my own personal crow army.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: It starts in outer space.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: It's aliens.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: It's zombies. It's like your standard douchey frat boy movie.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: It is all of the dumb movies rolled into one.
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: And there's a slasher storyline thrown in.
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: It's all of the things kind of thrown in, and
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: somehow it still comes out super fun and ridiculous but
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: enjoy but he.
• 4:45
  Speaker 5: Kept doing it this morning and so finally pierce went
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: over and opened the door and he went in and
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: he found something and i'm sitting on the floor doing
• 4:54
  Speaker 5: my hair and i have the like mirror in front
• 4:55
  Speaker 5: of me so i see him behind me walk up
• 4:58
  Speaker 5: with a tail flipping up and down like out of
• 5:02
  Speaker 5: his mouth this is pierce right.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah i mean this is the horror movie i'm writing Well, again,
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: if anything, it's like right up your alley because it's
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: not only horror related, but like the comedy writing is
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: like so top notch. I like to mix it up
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: so people.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: Don't have to hear me.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: Two stories below ground, one level above hell.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: Oh, man. Bottom feeder. Bottom feeder.
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: This has two taglines.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: Evil lies beneath the surface. That's where they spent all
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: their money on taglines.
• 5:41
  Speaker 4: You know, I don't think I had a favorite character.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: Inject yourself with this, and you follow it up with
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: this blue stuff, you're good. It's gonna fix everything that's
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: messed up with you, your jacked up face, you'll be
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: able to walk around without that wheelchair, like, everything's gonna
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: be great. But, if you're off just a little, mutant creature.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: I was like, is that how we do things?
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: I mean....
• 6:09
  Speaker 5: The stone cold badass.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: I'm telling you, after a while, I was like, I'm
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: on board with this chick. She's pretty cool.
• 6:16
  Speaker 5: She's a little excessive. She pulls her gun out at
• 6:19
  Speaker 5: everything and everyone.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Just saying. I was kind of okay with her. She'd
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: like to come over.
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: Why did he even bother to consult the map? Because
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: it was three squares connected with a line. And then
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: one diagonal.
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: It's a hallway. So you go down it, you get
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: to the other part. This whole movie's hallways. That's all
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: we got.
• 6:43
  Speaker 5: I was so perplexed by their side gig when they
• 6:48
  Speaker 5: were having that phone call to negotiate tongue depressors for $ 32.
• 6:54
  Speaker 5: What was the whole case?
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: That's a great deal.
• 6:58
  Speaker 5: I was like, it's $ 32.
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: It hardly seems worth the time and risk of being fired.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: And I kept thinking we were.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: I.
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: Was just like, no. Stop talking. Just go get killed
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: by a monster. And, like, everybody mentioned... Like, the interview
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: with Tom Sizemore, he brings it up. The interview with
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: the agent chick brings it up. Like, everybody's like, yeah,
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: normally you don't shoot this many pages. It's like, normally
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: if you're on... If you're Tom Sizemore doing, you know, heat...
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: You're doing one page today. You know, like, all you
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: gotta do is you go through this page, you make
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: sure you get your coverage and your shots and, like,
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: everybody's there and everything's taken care of and we invest
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: tons of time and money into making this scene look great.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: They were shooting ten or more pages a day.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: So, like, that's probably when, you know, day two, Tom
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: Sizeman was like, screw this. I'm out of here. Like,
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: this isn't how I work.
• 7:57
  Speaker 5: And then he and the agent lady get all flirty.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: With each other.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: I mean, can you blame him for some reason? She's
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: very bossy. And that's the way Tom likes it.
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: Priorities.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: Maybe I was just reading into it.
• 8:11
  Speaker 5: First we escape the rat man. Then we get to
• 8:14
  Speaker 5: know each other.
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: Can we flash back to the beginning? Yes.
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: Where she just.
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: What was that?
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: The sunglasses.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: But why? Why? Yeah, why did she.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Because we don't know what it was
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: they just blew up. And I was like, is that
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: coming back later? Nope. It's just like, just that she
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: knows how to work an explosive device?
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Is that all we needed to set up?
• 8:36
  Speaker 5: Or.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: This is the stakes of these guys are such horrible people.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: They'll blow up a building. We don't know why or
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: what it was or what this has to do with
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: what we're talking about. But look, they blew up a building.
• 8:48
  Speaker 5: Well, it had a beaker on it. So clearly it
• 8:50
  Speaker 5: is a science building. I just noticed a note that
• 8:55
  Speaker 5: I had, which was, rat man is in his business pants.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Well.
• 9:01
  Speaker 5: He has his black business performance.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: He took a.
• 9:04
  Speaker 4: Page from the Incredible Hulk, and even though he doesn't
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: need pants anymore, he needs pants still.
• 9:09
  Speaker 5: Like, oh, listen, I slacks.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Rat man's got a slacks. I mean, nobody cleared
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: it with him that day. Like, look, dress in loose clothes,
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: because you're probably going to mutate into a giant rat guy.
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: My dad walked in and asked me what I was watching,
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: and then he wanted a synopsis, and I thought, oh,
• 9:26
  Speaker 4: this is going to take forever to explain. And then
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: about 30 seconds later, as I'm explaining it, I'm like, no,
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: that's it.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: That's pretty much it. Tom Sizemore.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: Comments.
• 9:41
  Speaker 5: Questions.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: Life choices.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: Life choices. Questioned.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Lots of questions.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: So go to MovieMeltdown.com and you can join the Meltdown
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Horror Club and give us a much better movie than him.