Latest / Morrow Marriage | Disrupting Divorce / Can God Save Your Marriage? | The 'NEW' Marriage | Ep498

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Can God Save Your Marriage? | The 'NEW' Marriage | Ep498 · Morrow Marriage | Disrupting Divorce

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Can God save your marriage?
• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Sexless marriage.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_00: The number one relationship hack.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: Answer the question: the impact that impacts trust.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: Getting your partner on board.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: Can God save your marriage?
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Moral Marriage Podcast, guys, and I am fired up for this episode.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: We are making some massive, massive changes, but let me rewind.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: This is really, really powerful.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of you guys spend a lot of time praying and not enough time doing.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm gonna explain that today on this episode because I think it's important.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: You must involve God.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um do you have to?
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: No, I just think that you're slowing yourself down.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: And let me tell you something really quick about our story.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I mean, I didn't, I was atheist when I built the program, and everybody's like, is this built on the Bible?
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: Is this based off the Bible?
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, no, I was raised atheist.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_02: But you were raised atheist, but by the time you you built this program, you weren't atheist.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: I was no, yeah.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: When I actually I was raised atheist, I was agnostic when I met Catherine, and I was very fucking angry for not hearing or finding God or having a gift of faith.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, there's lots of different ways I can describe this.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: It was a very frustrating journey until um about April 2024 when I went to Africa and found God.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm the kind of guy that's all in.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: Guys, some of you guys need to know that if you want the answers, you gotta go find the answers, which is how I built the reset.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: But there's something really cool about that.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't just the books, it wasn't the podcast, it wasn't the coaches, it wasn't the trial and error.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: There was God always in the gaps, which is why I have the song Always in the gaps, which is my testimony.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: I love that song so much.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's your favorite song that I've written as worship.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Did you like that one?
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um here's the thing: can God save your marriage?
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: God can.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: I believe there's miraculous miracles.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: I see things like uh one of the things I used to get frustrated uh over was like I smoke a lot.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: If you guys don't know, I smoke a lot, like way too much too much.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: And um, one of the things that I would hear in church a lot throughout the years uh was I was I was healed from my addiction, I was delivered from my addiction.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, I was mad at God for that too.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: Like, why don't you just make it easy?
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: I just want to quit smoking.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what the fuck?
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: And uh we should just really quickly address.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we swear, yeah, we're Christian, and you probably spoke worse to your parents.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: So don't get offended.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: Let's remove it to your parents, to your spouse.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: So don't, so, so don't get all up in your butt and judge.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: Can we just keep moving forward as Christians that are just real and authentic, okay?
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_02: Um He swears a little more than I do.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: A lot, yeah.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry guys, I'm uncomfortable if you're watching on YouTube.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'm having a really tough scout is killing my back.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: I have a nerve pain and it's not going away.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: Please, Jesus, let's do this thing.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, so I want to say this like God can work these miracles in many people, but for many of you, your pain is the the the He's putting you through that.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: Every uh you're doing a women's Bible study right now.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: So Esther, right?
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, Esther became a queen after everything she was going through.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you have to go through everything God's putting you through.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: So you can pray and pray and pray, but you also have to do the work.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: I believe that God was always in the gaps for for me, for us, teaching me.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, one of my songs I've written is like uh like like God, you gave me the like the ability to know.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: In other words, Catherine would say, You've always been hearing from God, and I was like so mad I wasn't hearing God, but there he was.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the thing I wasn't doing fuck all with my journey.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: I was literally moving forward.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: You talk a lot about how people can pray and people are um leaning in.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: I I created this new Bible study for men right now, which actually is a 21-day prayer challenge to save your marriage and save others.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: And you told me last night, you're like, yeah, but like people will do that and then they might not do the work.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_02: Right?
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: Can you speak to that, please?
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_02: Um I don't know if that's exactly what I said, but I think that people will take the things that you're teaching them and they'll pray, and then they'll make the assumption that prayer is now prayer can be enough.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_02: If God wants to just change something, he will.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: Agreed.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_02: But it's like, remember that we are all God's children.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_02: When your child is like, can I please eat this piece of cake when dinner is in 20 minutes?
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like, no, I know you want the cake, and I know that's what you think you need right now, but you you know you can't have the cake, right?
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_02: And so God can do anything with prayer.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_02: So I think people will use potentially, because there's so much value in there, people will put everything on prayer and pray about like what's your one of your topics?
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_02: Give me a topic.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: Uh uh in my uh challenge?
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_00: So like there's an identity one, there's an addiction one, there's all these real problems.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_02: So you do the the prayer work, you do the Bible study on addiction, then you're like, okay, now I'm just gonna wait for God to heal my addiction.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_02: Well, what if God's gonna heal your addiction through some sort of program, through working with other people?
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_02: Don't ignore what the work that needs to be done.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_02: God will do something, but sometimes he'll put people in your path.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_02: You have to open your eyes.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_02: So I I I don't think that's what I said yesterday at all, but I could definitely hopefully that makes sense to what you're looking for.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: It is what you said, but maybe we didn't go further further into the conversation.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, in essence, what Catherine's talking about is something that we'll talk about a lot with people, uh, even even paid clients.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: So they're already in the program and they're talking about their prayers.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: Man, I'm all over it.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: I totally get it.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: But like what Catherine You have to pray, guys.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but what Catherine just described was um the the man in the boat.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_02: I just I thought the same thing.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, when he's like so the man on the desert island, you guys have heard me talk about it before, and he's like, Lord save me, Lord save me.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_02: And a guy comes along on a boat and he's like, Hey, get in my boat, I'll take you off this island.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_02: He's like, nope, nope, I'm good, I don't need your help.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_02: But another boat comes, no, I'm waiting on the Lord, a third boat comes and he's like, No, I'm just waiting for God to help me.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_02: And they're all like, Okay, bro, they leave.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_02: And then he's like, Oh God, why have you forsaken me?
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_02: Why didn't you why didn't you save me?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_02: Dude, I sent you three boats.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_02: I sent you three boats, you just didn't get on it.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_02: So I answered your prayer.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_02: I just didn't answer the prayer in the way that you thought I was gonna do it.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_02: He didn't, I don't know how the guy thought, like he was gonna pluck him off with his with God's own hand and put it somewhere.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_02: So you'll close your eyes, you'll pray, and because you'll have your your headset on, okay, your head is is thinking, well, I'm I'm at this addiction Bible study, or I'm at this uh identity Bible study, and this is what we prayed about, this is what we learned about, and now I'm just gonna wait for God to do it.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_02: Well, God's gonna do it, but not if your eyes are closed to all of the different ways that God is gonna help you move forward in that area.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I'll give you a really good example.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: Let's stick with the addiction theme.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, one of the prayers I have is is, and Catherine and I had a good conversation about purpose yesterday.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: Uh like what is God's purpose for you?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: And um, Catherine said, explain it like uh if you're not on YouTube, I'm gonna go big with my hands.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: I'm way up here, up high.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: Catherine said, most people are a little bit lower here when it comes to that.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: They don't need the same as you.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_02: Everybody carries something different, and God has a different purpose for everyone.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_02: Some people's purpose is massive.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_02: Some people's purpose, like I said to Cass, you know, someone's purpose, it might just be that they're the janitor at the elementary school.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: That is the same thing.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: That was exactly what you used, yeah.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_02: That's it.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_02: Because of the thing.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: But you actually went, she went further.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: She said, but the way he brings joy and and love to these children and the way that he interacts with them and brightens their day, or I can't remember.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: Something.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_02: So that is his purpose.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_02: He's living his purpose.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean that you have to do something extravagant.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_02: You could just like your job could actually be your purpose.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: But sticking with the theme for addiction, like, let's go extravagant.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: You build this big bad course and you're all over the internet and you're doing what we do with marriage, but you're doing it for addiction.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: That's big, that's massive, what she's talking about.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: But it's also uh the example I used on a coaching call yesterday was well, what if you go to AA and you say, I'm, I'm, hey, I'm Cast and I'm an alcoholic.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's what you'd normally do.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: What if you said, hey, I'm Cass, I'm not an alcoholic anymore?
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's fulfilling purpose.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like you're literally gonna try to change the AA meeting to stop labeling fucking alcoholics.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: Because why do you think you're in your pain?
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: We create the life that we don't want.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: So what I'm saying here when we connect back to God is this God can definitely be there for you.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I think God will.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: But since you don't know God's plan, you better get your ass in gear because there's some motherfuckers in the Bible who've been waiting fucking years, a hundred years, a century for shit.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: What's the one with the story with the one who wants the babies?
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_01: Sarah.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: Sarah.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: And Abraham.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: And Abraham.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's like a hundred years, man.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he yeah.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: He was faithful, that was good.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: When she finally got hurt.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: But what if you decide to do the work?
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what that looks like, man.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: They didn't probably do things like this back then.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: But what if in today's times you're Sarah and Abraham and you're adopting right now, you're fostering right now, you're doing more of the work that God can pour into.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, but I know this.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: You're sitting there waiting and praying.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: The amount of people that say, I just want to pray before I make a decision on what to do here.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: Listen, you've been sitting up at night at 2 a.m.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_00: with a throbbing heart on for as long as I can fucking remember.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: What the fuck are you praying about?
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: You guys gotta get to get listen, I'm not saying don't pray.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_02: What I'm saying is open your eyes to what you are praying for.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: Correct.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_02: If you pray and you only have your idea that um you pray for success and you think that God's gonna give you success by giving you a promotion, by giving you a better job, by making your business make more money.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_02: What if God does it in a different way?
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_02: But because you're only looking at it from one perspective, you will miss what God is doing.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, what if you're supposed to be marriage coaches?
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: The success is in not having the business, but actually getting through the try tr uh tribulations right now and actually sharing.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I'm just making that shit up.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: But like we don't know.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_00: Like the bottom line is you guys get stuck in your thought process, asking for what you want.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Here's a really good example.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, the prayer challenge that I have, the second one is called uh it's so they're all written with songs because you know I like to write songs for you guys to relate to you.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: So they're all songs we repeat the prayer over and over again.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_00: There is study on the scripture, every single line is something from the Bible or a story from the Bible.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: Everything, everything, okay?
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the songs is called Change Me First.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: Okay?
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: So the questions that you're gonna talk about after you've gone through this and before you do the final prayer just out loud without the song is simple.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, why are you trying to change?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: How many of you guys pray for your partner to change instead of realizing you can change yourself?
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: See, you can pray all you want, but some of you guys are so narrow in your thought process.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, that's what it is.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: That you don't even realize you're asking your partner to change all of these prayers, by the way, like they're written like this like you can pray for the addict, but you can pray for the person who's dealing with the addict.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: We can do that at the same time.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: Isn't that cool?
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so I want you guys to think about God saving your marriage in a way where you change your perspective and you change the direction of your actions and your thought process and then try to bring God in.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Listen, I was blessed.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_00: God came into our marriage and just gave me things.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: I get it.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: I get it.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: We all want that, but that's for the purpose that I'm doing right now.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: If it wasn't my purpose, I d I dare say it's why we see so many people praying and waiting for l literally decades.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_02: And can you imagine if Cass wasn't obedient and if he was praying to God for whatever success, and God's like, well, I I tried to tell you to go into this line of business forever, and you didn't do it, and then then you're spinning your tires doing something that God didn't tell you to do.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: 100%.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: Good good point.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: Good point.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_02: So, yeah, God came in and gave you all these things, but you were also obedient.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_02: When I said, Hey, why don't you coach men?
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_02: You didn't say that's crazy.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_02: You said, Okay, let's try it.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_02: And you did it.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_02: And then the next step was this, and then you did it.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_02: And the next step was this, and then you did it.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_02: So it's not just about God giving you things, guys.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_02: God is giving God gives to all of his children.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's just that some of you are blind or you're going in the d in the wrong direction.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_02: I think probably what was a blessing for you, honey, is that we all hear from the Lord, but I can't say that I heard from the Lord when I said, Why don't you teach men?
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_02: But like, where else would that have come from?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_02: Why would I just say that out of my own idea?
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: Especially because if you look back to our story, like you you didn't, we hadn't like we hadn't even really got together.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: We were doing better, and I wasn't nearly as angry, but well, I still have lots of work to do.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_02: But Catherine But I said, Why don't you coach men?
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so here's that's not that wouldn't have come from my own human mind.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_02: So, so yeah, part of the blessing there is that I likely heard from God in that, and then Cass was obedient.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_02: He didn't know he was obedient to the Lord at the time, he was just respecting his wife, which is part of what God wants you to do anyway.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I love this topic.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: I love how it's gone, you guys.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: I just want you to replay it like five times.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to think about it like what am I doing here when I pray?
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because this is another way to look at this would be like, why do I go to the counselor and just sit in my pain?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: Why do I call my friend and get validation and uh hate my spouse with them?
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: You know, why do I just ignore my spouse and go to my phone or my kids or my job?
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: You know, like all of these are the exact same thing of uh praying and waiting.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's literally just doing nothing.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: You must do, you must do, which is why the first, the very first uh prayer of the 21-day challenge is desperate to hear you.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: I want you guys focused on trying to hear God so we can talk to God every single day, but we must do the work.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: And the more we can hear them, the more we can be obedient, like Catherine said.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you love this episode.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: I feel fired up.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: By the way, did you see my wife?
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you're not on YouTube, you're missing out.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_00: She is fucked, you're fucking hot today.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: Look at this hair.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: Whoo! She's looking good.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks, baby.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: Guys, we'll see you next time.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_02: Bye.