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World Changers | Kristen Welch · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: Hi friends, welcome to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Amy Wicks, your host, as well as our good friend, Ashley Pittman.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: Here at Simply Wholehearted, we are sharing our journey as we discover how to better love the Lord with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_01: Even though you might be surrounded by a world of half-heartedness, we hope to inspire you to living wholeheartedly by inviting different friends to share their simple ideas of how they live unplugged, purposeful, and intentional in their everyday.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: Today's guest is someone you may have met before.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: Kristen's blog is We Are That Family, and she is the author of Raising Grateful Kids in an Ungrateful World.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: And chances, if you have kids or know some, that title may have caught your eye or your ear in the past.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_01: Her newest book is about raising world changers.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_01: Stories from her experience and her kids' perspective as well.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: The passion of my life is to bring daily understanding and gratefulness to the pleasure and abundance I get to experience every day and the freedoms I get to have in America.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: So, we talk about all of that and the call for us to make the most of every opportunity we've been given.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Now, here's our conversation with Kristen Welch.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um because I sort of let Ashley know a little bit late that you were gonna be on the podcast.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: She's like, that name sounds familiar.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: Because I took a picture of the book and I'm like, I'm so excited about this book.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm really like, I'm reading it, and I'm like, you can't have it until I'm done with it.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_01: Because no, it's good.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_01: No, I like I really like your approach, and I feel like you're saying some things that I would say that I'm sometimes a little afraid to say.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like I like I just really appreciate that.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um thank you.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_02: I was actually reading, I typically don't read book reviews, but right now they're all from my launch team.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so yeah, it was that was what people kept saying over and over.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_02: And I I think I am so used to just saying what I think that maybe I don't know how it always comes across that everyone was like, this is a kick in the pants.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, um, yes, that's good.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_02: We need that sometimes, but a lot of times, you know, people have to be receptive.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, it's hard to um you have to be in that place where you want the kick.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_02: Totally.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we were just talking about.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: So you may have overheard us, or um, with another situation that people need to be teachable, and sometimes you just put it out there and then let them wrestle it out, you know.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: You may not convince them, but here, here's something to wrestle with.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, exactly.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_01: Which is what we want them to do because you're not putting words in their mouth, but you're giving them a viewpoint and a perspective, hopefully biblically, you know, based.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and then they can figure out okay, what do I believe?
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: Am I gonna listen to culture or the word of God and I'm gonna figure it out for myself?
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: So I think it's good.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: And I I like too, because I was just reading um uh just the fact that your first book, well, not it's not actually your first book, it was your third book book, Raising Grateful Kids in Entitled World.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um and I got that title right, right?
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_01: All of a sudden I was like, okay, but just anyway, that you because I struggle with this too.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes I think my I just make the error of like every doesn't everyone think this way.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_01: And when you were getting the feedback all the time, especially from the local church, hey, uh, you know, this is not what's gonna be, you know, what where families are living, um or what how you know from their viewpoint, and we could be teaching them all this stuff, but that's not we don't feel like we're having the impact.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: And anyway, I just I think that I was like, oh yeah, that's right.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: We kind of make that mistake of thinking, oh everyone thinks my way.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, it's true.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_01: So we don't always take the time to articulate what we do believe.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_01: I'm so sorry, we're having lots of sirens, aren't we?
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: All sorts of sirens this morning.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry, I think it's just the aftermath of cleanup.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, anyway.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_01: Sorry, it was distracting.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_01: Um are y'all located?
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: We're in Kansas City.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we just it's just crazy weather.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_01: How about you?
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_01: Where are you at?
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_02: I'm in Houston, about an hour north of Houston.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: Have you lived there for a long time or I have.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_02: I was I I grew up about two hours um south of here, closer to the coast, like Galveston area.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_02: And then lived outside of Texas for about 10, 11 years with my husband.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_02: He was a youth pastor and then came back here.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_02: So this is home, Texas is home.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: That's awesome.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: Well, tell me some of the timeline.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_01: I was just curious because obviously you have the opportunity now to speak, you know, vocally, share your thoughts and your mind and your perspective.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: You know, what's kind of the timeline of when that started, besides just living, you know, as a pastor's wife and a mom, and maybe, you know, being asked to share your opinion or, you know, discipling in that way.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: But you have a ministry now of your own that you're, you know, running and all that sort of stuff.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: What paint that kind of picture for, you know, just a background of that?
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_02: Well, it really I think I feel like my story really changed um in 2010 when I traveled to Nairobi with Compassion International.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_02: Um I was sort of anonymous, I think, before then.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I had a blog and was writing every day and it was growing, but I I'm an introvert, so I wasn't going anywhere.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_02: Um and up until that point, it was more like um And you're raising your kids.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_02: Raising my kids, and they were little at the time, and it was inspiring and humorous stories, kind of just snapshots of motherhood.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_03: Sure.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_02: But when I went to Nairobi um with Compassion International, uh that trip-wrecked me, and it really just altered the entire course of my life.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_02: So that was um nine years ago and almost nine years ago, and that you know, ever since then we've just been on a different path, I guess.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_01: So but was it as far as was there a moment in particular, or was it the whole entire trip?
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I think leading up to that trip, I was um I think I was just dissatisfied with my life and um really struggling with purpose and um I was very wrapped up in motherhood, which is a good thing, but you know, sometimes you lose your identity.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_02: And I um up until that time, I had I wanted to be a world changer, but I was getting my world rocked, I felt like on a daily basis, just with um with life.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_02: And so um when I was invited on that trip, I actually my first response was no.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_02: I told him I couldn't go and I didn't want to go.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_02: And that night I told my husband, I got this crazy invitation today, and he was, I think, really disappointed that I said no.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_02: And he was like, Why would you turn down an opportunity like that?
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, Because I'm afraid it would change my life.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_02: Whoa, maybe it needs to change your life.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_02: And I think he had seen that emptiness in me and that um just being unsatisfied.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_02: And I was living the American dream and had really bought into this is our starter home.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we're just getting started.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_02: We're I have big plans for our bank account, and we're in plans to be honest, just and he had seen that, and um and so just encouraged me to call back and say yes, and so I did.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_02: And at the time, I think that was probably the the hardest yes of my life.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_02: I had a my youngest was two, and um it's just a big deal to leave them.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, my kids, and it was like a 15, 16-day trip.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_02: So it was a long time away from home um and so far away.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_02: But um, I woke up in a slum in Kenya and literally woke up physically and spiritually, and um, you know, people use the term wrecked by God, and I think I thought I was going to like be maybe a hero or this great storyteller and be a voice for the voiceless and all of the you know, preconceived ideas, and what I discovered was my own spiritual poverty.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_02: And I remember standing in a home of a young boy who when we visited the home, they had told us um this is an orphan-led home.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_02: And I had never heard that term before.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_02: Really?
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_02: It was basically a home that had no parents, and the oldest child was in charge of the siblings.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_02: And um, he was like 14 years old, and we're sitting in his home, standing in his home because he didn't have chairs and didn't have a bed.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_02: And I mean, it was like the size of my master bathroom.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_02: And uh, and I just felt so sorry for him, really, just not in a good way, just I pitied him and he showed us his one candle that he did his homework by and how he told us how he got up at 3:30 every morning to go buy vegetables at the market to come back and sell them for money, and then he would walk his brothers to school.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, it was just like this blew my mind, but he couldn't stop smiling the whole time.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_02: He was grinning as he told us how he lived, and he was so grateful for it.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_02: And he asked if we had any questions, and he was probably thinking more like you know, practical questions about his life, and I raised my hand and um and I've always regretted this, but at the same time, um, it was so telling for where I was in my life.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_02: I asked him how he could be so happy.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_02: How can you have so much joy?
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_02: And he looked at me, so you know, kind of surprised, and he said, ma'am, I have Jesus and He's enough for me.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_02: And that's when I realized that I was 37 years old, that I had Jesus too, that he wasn't enough for me.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_02: And um, that shook me to my core that I had been in church my whole life and I was very full of faith, but I had not done very much for the kingdom.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_02: I just hadn't been very obedient.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_02: And um at the end of that trip, our trip leader sat us down and you know, sort of helped us process what we had experienced.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I it was just um still to this day.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I can see it in your face.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_02: It was the hardest thing I've ever done.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, every night we would come back after experiencing sometimes it felt like days in hell where you're just seeing so much human suffering and meeting survival prostitutes.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_02: And I mean, it was just overwhelming.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_02: I would just go back to the hotel and just sob in the shower, like just sort of releasing it.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_02: But at the end of the trip, um the leader had said, You're going to respond to this trip.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_02: And for some of you, it will be to do nothing, and for some of you, it will be to change your life.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_02: And I remember just sitting there thinking, every time I've been led to this edge, I've always responded by doing nothing.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_02: And this time I just made a vow to God and to myself that this would I would leave different.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_02: And we came, I came home from that trip, and four months later we started Mercy House Global.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_02: And really, it's just been a response to um finding joy and purpose in giving our lives away.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: And I think it's so I mean, even more profound because you guys were in the ministry, quote unquote, already.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of people would go, Well, you're already giving your life away.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: You're working in a church, serving at a church.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_02: Well, we had actually um left full-time ministry um a few years before that, probably five years before that.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_02: And um, and we left it because we were again unsatisfied and we wanted to live like regular people.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_02: I remember we used to say that all the time.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_02: We want a 401k and better insurance, and we wanted the American dream.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_02: There's no doubt about it.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_02: We wanted to better our life, and so we got on that track for about five years where my husband had a fantastic job, um, and we had plenty of money, more way more than we needed.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_02: But in that journey, um, it just instead of giving us more, it took more from us.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, yep.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: Because more to maintain and more to keep and more to worry about.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_02: And I think, you know, there's so many layers when you have more than you need, um you change your lifestyle.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that that's really the message of raising world changers.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_02: And it's not an easy one to swallow, and I understand that.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but I I think that my entire life, every blessing that I've received, and you know, I'm not saying that we're not blessed, we're very blessed, but I think we use that as an excuse to just have more.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_02: And every good thing that had come in my life that was from God.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, every good and perfect gift comes from our Father above.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: But instead of asking, God, did you give me this to keep?
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_02: I just assumed it was always for me to keep.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't ask God, did you give this to me to share?
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's the question that was missing from my life for so long.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_02: I just assumed everything was a blessing.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_02: I'm blessed, you know.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but when I started asking God, did you, is this a test?
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_02: You know, maybe this is a test.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_02: It's not a blessing.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_02: And I just discovered I had failed that test so many times.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_02: And um, I remember one day it very clearly um when one of these blessings just landed in my lap and it was unexpected.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I remember I opened the mail and and there was literally a check in the mail, and we were doing yard work.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_02: So my whole family saw my response as I like kind of I was shocked.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_02: I dropped the other mail and they ran up.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_02: They were like, What is it?
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_02: What's in the mail?
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_02: What's fun?
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Um, mom just got a big check in the mail.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_02: And my kids were like, What are we gonna do with it?
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, and I mean clearly just like just dropped on my heart.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I felt the Holy Spirit say, You can change your lifestyle again.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_02: Because I had done that my whole I mean, I was just good at yeah, moving on up.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, moving on up, or you can change a life with this.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I told my kids, we are going to change a life with it.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_02: And it was a turning point for us, and it was fun to decide pray about and decide as a family whose life are we going to change?
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_02: Like we can really impact someone with us.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: And um, and even though it's it's not a popular message, I think that it's missing from most Christians' lives, and the joy and purpose that God has for us when we give our lives away is unparalleled to anything we will ever experience.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that there's this deception, especially in our culture of bigger and better and the American dream and all of that.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, we're a consuming nation and it's not um it's not necessarily our fault, right?
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_02: We were all born here in God's sovereign and we have because this is where we were born.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but I think that we have been deceived into believing that um if we share what we have, we will have less.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, there's that, I mean, economically and on paper, that makes sense.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_02: You know, if you have 10 apples and you give eight away, you are only gonna have two.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_02: So we think like that that we're gonna have less if we share what we have.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_02: But in God's upside-down kingdom, where uh we can't, it's not apples to apples, and we can't compare the same.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_02: There's biblical principles that are so true that when we give to those in need, we don't have less, we have more.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and we're just a testimony to that that God multiplies it and he creates something from nothing.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_02: And not only do we have more, we have more joy and more purpose and more peace.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_02: And it's just this contagious cycle of God, what are you gonna give me next so I can share it with others?
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_02: And it's not just money.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, there and I think that's it's it's time, it's resources, it's our talents, you know.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_02: And and really when I wrote this book, I wrote it from a the perspective of a mom because I'm raising kids and and I don't feel like I'm a professional necessarily anything, but um I want my kids to know that they're unique and there's only one of them, and God um gave them special gifts to be shared.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, when we have, I think the reason we call it a gift is because we we don't pay for it, we we receive it, but at the same time, gifts are meant to be given.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_02: And so um raising my kids with that in that viewpoint and knowing that God gave you a gift, and when you are sharing that gift, you feel his delight.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I think it helps them um even the projection of their lives, you know, where what what are you doing when you feel God's shining on you?
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_02: And how can you give that back to him for his glory and impact people?
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_02: And so giving our lives away isn't just our resources and you know, our finances and our physical belongings, but it's also um returning to him what he's given to us so that it can glorify him and bless other people.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it it's even you know, the time, the talent, um, a lot of times too, even the relational investment, which it can feel like, oh, and depending on your personality type, I only have so much reserve left in me.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_01: But I think, I mean, even you wrote this in the book about your son's um teacher, um, Archer teacher.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um share his story because I think that's a prime example of it wasn't even money.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was like literally just every last bit of him.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_01: Hey friends, I'm popping in here for a quick minute to tell you something exciting that's happening here at Simply Wholehearted.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_01: Now, if you are a podcast VIP, then you already know about the newest project.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: And what I have let them know is last winter during our conversation with Jody Burton, which was episode 35, we were talking about praying for those we love.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_01: And then the struggle and reality of finding time to pray for those we love and having convenient prompts to remind us to pray.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_01: So while we were talking, I was like, oh, I should, I should do these minivan prayers, right?
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, this is actually a really good idea.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_01: I need minivan prayers.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_01: So I've been thinking about it now for a while, and because my personal experience trying to get kids ready and out the door for the school day is not always a peaceful one, I thought I should really get to work on this.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_01: So I'd love to do breakfast devotions, right?
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: With the kids, this peaceful, serene moment.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_01: Or when we have a meal together in the evening, have like, you know, time for formal scripture reading and prayer, but it just doesn't happen.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: So I thought it could help me if I had a scripture and prayer card ready for us in the car to use on the way to school, or back and forth from piano lessons and drama and theater and sports.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_01: And I found out quickly as I started talking about this idea that I wasn't the only one.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of my friends start sharing that, oh yeah, they would love this for maybe even their specific and unique situation in life.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe have prayer cards and scripture for, you know, prayers for peace when they were feeling afraid or hope when they were discouraged.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: And even reminders to pray for racial reconciliation and praying for freedom for those who are being trafficked here in the United States and around the world.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_01: I have to say, those are obviously my very thoughtful friends.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_01: I wouldn't even think that.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: I'm more like, Lord, just help me get through the day.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, if you can't tell already, I am so excited about this idea.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_01: My creative juices are flowing, and I hope before too long we can maybe have our first or maybe two simply wholehearted products.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_01: So here's the thing though.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_01: I really struggle with decisions sometimes, especially when it involves a lot of other people.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_01: I also really value having a conversation about new ideas.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: So, would you be willing to give me some input?
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_01: It would be really easy for you to do that because I've created a brief survey to gather your opinion.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um, literally, it's three questions and a little thank you note.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_01: The link is Really accessible.
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_01: You can find it in the show notes here on whatever podcast format you're using or on our website at simply wholehearted.com.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks so much already.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: I really value any input that you want to give me.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: All right, back to the conversation.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I I think that in that period in our lives, you know, you see your kids go through phases and stages that as parents you don't know how to help them out of.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_02: And your burden for them.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_02: Because you're like, God, this has to change.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and you don't have a heart.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_02: You don't have a guidebook or it was one of times that we were my husband and I were worried about our son, and we were just praying Uber him and for him, um, that he would be confident and know who God created him to be.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_02: And um we found the answer through archery, just a sport that he could shine in and he was naturally gifted.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_02: And um, but it was really that period in our lives, it changed because of a man who was his archery coach, and he literally poured into our son, and not just um, you know, encouragement for the physical act of archery, you know, the sport as a coach would do, but um just whispering in his ear at every every practice, every lesson, um, who he was in Christ and and how God created him to be.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_02: And we just began to see our son um believe that.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_02: And it really began to change who he was.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_02: And um, and this man was wildly generous, and so he was generous with his words and encouragement, but he was also generous with archery equipment, and he had told our son that he was his sponsor, and that's scary.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_02: Um he he was actually a very proficient, um, awarded archer himself, and so he had a lot of equipment, and he would just swap out things here and there, and and you know, as your sponsor, you need this, and he was just very generous, and we were you know humbled by the way that he treated our son.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_02: And um, a couple of years into this relationship, uh, he was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer, and um very quickly things changed for him and um and even for us, and it was devastating.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I I don't think I've cried more over um the fear of losing someone um other than that, you know, more than that coach just because I knew how important he was to our son, and yeah, um you just pray that God will fill your kids' lives with people like this.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, sometimes we uh we can tell our kids everything they need to hear, but God often uses other people for them to actually hear it.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's they're not gonna always listen to us.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and we're supposed to say those things, right?
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: I mean that's exactly they brush off the compliments or the praises because you're just my mom and dad, of course.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_02: So within um six months, you know, he wasn't um really coaching my son anymore um physically, but when he was bedridden, he would have John Avery come stand beside his bed and he would adjust his bow and he would just use the opportunity just to pour into him.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, on his deathbed, he until he took his last breath, he poured into our son.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_02: And um, you know, walking through that with your kids is really hard.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_02: And he would cry in our arms and um he struggled with a lot of questions and uh naturally, yeah.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_02: And um, right the last week of his life, his um wife did not want John Avery, our son, to see him because physically he was just not the same, and she didn't want him to remember him that way.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and so we sat outside his home the night before he died and just sat outside of his home in our car because we couldn't go in, but we just wanted to be close to him.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: And our son wrote him a letter and um and it was just a thank you letter that was as emotional as you can imagine.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and so um my husband went up to the door and gave the family the letter and they read it over this coach, and he died an hour later.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_02: And um, and then they asked my son to read it at the funeral.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_02: And so in front of 500 people, he he read that letter.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_02: And um, long story short, uh a couple of months later, my son was turning 14 and we got a knock on the door, and it was his widow.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_02: And um the coach had left our son his bow and his equipment and his will, and um, which was a huge honor.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_02: And and then she just told him some of the things her husband had said about him.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_02: And just after his death, they continue to speak into his life.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_02: And um, and now our son really has a passion for um doing the same for there's a lot of uh young boys that are um recently in our community and our church that the dads have been absent and have left the moms, and um and and he wants to mentor them and just return what he received.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_02: And that's beautiful.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_02: I think that there's just no way to even describe the impact this man had on our family.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um and we in turn can have that impact on other people, you know, when we give our lives away and share what we've been given, we can impact them for the kingdom.
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_01: I mean that that's just like the ultimate right there.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like you said, it's not about the the money necessarily.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, yes, he gave a commitment and that was a sacrifice or could have been seen as a sacrifice, but you know, just to to pour in emotionally, you know, emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_01: All of that, that is just so beautiful.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_01: That's good.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_01: Well, what what inspired?
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, again, this is your fourth book, is that right?
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, okay.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_01: So it's raising world changers in a changing world.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if I had said that yet.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to make sure I said it's one, it's a beautiful cover.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_01: Um there's just something about it.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I I honestly like it just got sent to me.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_01: And just reading the title before I, you know, understood who wrote it, I was like, I this is exactly what I need.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: Like, this is the prescription.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_01: Because I had um read, I'm like, oh, that I bet that's like raising, you know, grateful kids in an entitled world.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_01: And then of course, sure enough, I realized it's like, oh, wait a minute, it's Kristen who she wrote the booth.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_01: And um because this is like we're in those tween years with our kids and oh man, um, I mean, I feel like this is where of course we can start them young, but especially where we feel some of that real like like the pinch, yeah, the friction and the pinch of like I only have a little bit of time you know left.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's starting to grow short.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and you know, realizing that other people what does it look like to have other people experiences situations speak into their life and and all of that sort of stuff.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_01: So, but what what specifically um prompted this book and this message that you felt like you wanted to share?
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_02: Well, the um my I call it my first um real book, which is probably not a good way to put it, but Mind Son Jesus um was my I think my first like pour my soul out.
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_02: Um that book really healed me in a lot of ways.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um and it was a it's a memoir.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_02: And so um then raising grateful kids is sort of how that obedience to God changed the way that we parent and really revealed a lot of things in our own lives and um and that's what they're there for, right?
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_01: To like help us wrestle these things down.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_02: And that was actually it was such a hard book to write.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_02: And I really like that.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_01: Because then you have to live it.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_02: I know, I know, and I just didn't want people to think that oh, here's someone who thinks they're an expert because it's really written for worldliness, and I think when people read it, they realize that.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_02: And I think you bleed out what you write.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_02: So those were some of my hardest parenting seasons when writing that book, of course, because the enemy just don't want you to be successful.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but I feel like Raising World Changers is a part two to both of those books.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: Like in my heart and mind and gut, I felt like I needed to continue those stories.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and yeah, it's really been my favorite book to write so far.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_02: It just um it's a message I had to get out of me.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_02: And I felt compelled by the Holy Spirit to um share.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_02: I felt like I was sitting on the secret um that just the joy that our family has experienced.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_02: I want other people to experience it.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um and so it felt like sort of a uh completing a story I had started.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_02: Okay and um and it was fun because I got to include my kids in the project.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: And um that wasn't always fun because they were sure you know, yeah, because uh they have like uh some question props in the yeah at the end of each chapter.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so then it kind of felt like homework in some instances, but then like it sounded really fun, and they were like, oh wait, we have to come on.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, um yeah, I did a podcast with one of my girls last night, but it was originally both of them, and the other one was you know, at the kind of like that too, like, oh wait a minute, I have to do this.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know, anyway, yeah, I get it.
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, now that it's out and they have their names in it and all that, that's cool.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: Like, this is awesome.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_01: That's cool.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they're glad they did it.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_02: But it felt fun and it like I was including them and I wanted people to hear from them, but at the same time, it was also as a mom, I treasured what they wrote.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, totally, because it felt, you know, our kids change us, and um and I think if we allow God to use them, they can minister to us, they can encourage us as much as they discourage us and don't minister to us.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_02: I think I think it's equal.
• 33:18
  SPEAKER_02: So um that was a total surprise for me that I would ask them these questions, and my older two especially, they that was their first year being homeschooled, and so they just typed up the answers and then emailed them to me.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_02: And so I wasn't really prepared for the answers, and I just cried reading them thinking, oh, they're so well spoken and they love Jesus, which is my goal.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's a if we could just skip that.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_02: And so it was it was a fun, fun project.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's awesome.
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_01: So, how does um like how does you know Mercy's House, right?
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_01: Again, yeah, Mercy House Global, um, your homeschooling, your writing, how do those all intertwine and what does that look like for you guys?
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_01: Is it everybody's involved?
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_02: And well, in the beginning, it definitely looked different than it does now.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_02: We started in our garage.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um, we had volunteers come twice a week that turned into a building in our backyard.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_02: And then eight years later, we rented a warehouse, and now we're in a 6,000 square foot warehouse, and we have we have a company picnic tomorrow night with 50 people.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's awesome.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_02: So that's our first actual nonprofit company picnic.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_02: But it's family members.
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_02: We have about 15 um employees, so it's all their husbands and kids.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so it's definitely changed, and in some ways it's gotten a lot easier.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_02: In some ways, it's gotten a lot harder because the burden, you know, when something is growing, I feel like your burden just doubles and responsibility is so huge.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_02: Um so in that sense, it's definitely gotten harder.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_02: But um, my husband quit his job three years ago, that really good job I was talking about um three years ago, and uh he's our CEO.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_02: So we go to work together every day, and um uh we are in this big red barn about uh two blocks from our house.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_02: And so um that's awesome.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_02: Days that my kids aren't in co-ops, they'll go and do schoolwork from there.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_02: They're all independent workers now.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_02: That is nice.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_02: That's very you've arrived.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um yeah, we are pretty um, I feel like we're pretty flexible too, just with we travel quite a bit.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_02: I just got back from Kenya last week and my one of my kids was with me um for two weeks there in Kenya.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_02: And um, so whenever I travel, I try to take someone with me, one of my kids with me.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_02: Um and then occasionally we get to go together as a family.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so I'm definitely um busy for sure.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but you know, I was busy before Mercy House, it just I was busy on things that didn't matter.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_02: And so um I feel like uh I just fall in bed at night so content with this life God's given us.
• 36:21
  SPEAKER_02: It's not perfect, sometimes it's really hard.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_02: And we deal with um Mercy House empowers women around the world, and most of those women have been trafficked or they're at risk of being trafficked.
• 36:32
  SPEAKER_02: We have three maternity homes in Nairobi, Kenya, which was really our initial response to starting um Mercy House and therefore for survival prostitutes and teenage moms, and that's where we were last week, and so there's a lot of heaviness that comes with that.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, um, and um and sorrow, I think you carry other people's trauma that you don't realize you're carrying, and um that has shaped our family for sure, and it's not all been positive, but at the same time, God redeems everything.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and as he's redeeming their stories, he continues to redeem our story and reminds us what really matters.
• 37:07
  SPEAKER_02: And and so it's been it's just been a joy, it's been a very hard, hard journey, but it's been a joy getting to live this life.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's amazing.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just listening to you talk about how when you were in ministry, doing ministry and you were discontent.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_00: So you moved out of that to have a normal life like everybody else, and you were still discontent.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I think sometimes that uh to me I feels like one of the worst things when you imagine when I get to the top of this thing I've been reaching for, and then you get there and you're like, I still have I feel like I have nothing, I still fill this big hole in uh and so for you to now have given up all that and step into this to finally find what real contentment is, I just think it's a great story and what a gift to you and to your kids.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_00: And even that small I'm just thinking ahead to people that are listening to this, that are living kind of the American dream and feeling discontent.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_00: What a good starting question that when you ask is did God did you give me this to keep or share?
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, what a great if nothing else, every time you get something, or whether it's your paycheck, whether it's some extra thing, okay, did you give this to me to keep or share?
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_02: And then Well, and when you think about your, you know, we all have problems and go through difficult times and have bad days, and you know, I think that's universal.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_02: What I've discovered is the best way to feel better about my own problems is to help someone with theirs.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_02: There's something very healing about that, and um and there's perspective that we get, you know, when you can see other people's lives through their eyes, it gives you compassion for them, it reminds you what you have, yeah, and then gratitude is born, and you're thankful for the gifts that God's given you and that you're maybe not going through that.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_02: And so it's just it's it's the solution.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_02: It is the solution for for not being content with our lives.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_02: And there are so many amazing ways that we can do that, and it doesn't have to be.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, one thing I just want to make sure people understand that your yes to God isn't gonna look like my yes, and it doesn't diminish the significance of it if it's smaller in what because we're so obsessed with size, it feels like that.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I could never do that.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_02: Well, you know what?
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_02: I still feel that way every single day.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I can't do this either.
• 39:32
  SPEAKER_02: And I think we have to say yes to things that are bigger than us because it make it leaves room for God to do the miraculous.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_02: Um, we don't have to feel qualified or adequate, we just have to offer what's in our hands.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_02: And at the time, you know, 2010, what was in my hand was a blog.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_02: That's what I had.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_02: It didn't feel like very much.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_02: I had a blog, I had a love for writing, and I had a connection to mothers.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_02: And that's all I had.
• 39:58
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, when you think about gifts or I mean, I have an English degree, I have no business doing what I'm doing.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_02: That God takes what we have.
• 40:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's the fish and love story.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_02: He multiplies it, he does the miraculous with it, and it doesn't have to be big to be significant.
• 40:17
  SPEAKER_02: And like, um, just a small example of that.
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_02: My my son um has a couple of friends that after he left public school, he just wanted to stay in touch with.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_02: He was like, Mom, they're not Christians, and I feel like they need Jesus, and I don't know how to.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_02: And so he's pursued these relationships and prayed for these boys.
• 40:38
  SPEAKER_02: And so now, you know, every Monday night we load up our car and we go pick them up one at a time.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_02: And he added another boy to the route the other day, and it took like 30 minutes.
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_02: And I looked at him and I was like, How many kids are we gonna pick up?
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, he was like, how many seats do we have in our van?
• 40:55
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like we're we're supposed to share what we have, right?
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Yes, sir.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_02: That's all we will when my oldest moves out in August to go off to college, we have an bedroom.
• 41:08
  SPEAKER_02: And um, we're excited for her.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but we're gonna miss her, of course.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_02: And we um have had this family on our refrigerator for 10 years that we've prayed for.
• 41:20
  SPEAKER_02: They're a Ukrainian uh pastor's family, and they started bringing in street kids, and so they have like nine children, and um, they live on$400 a month, and you know, they three years ago they became one of our artisan groups, not the family, but pastors' wives in Ukraine.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_02: And so they create Pear Trade product for Mercy House and so they're just sort of a part of our family, but we've only met the mom and dad a few times, we've never met the kids, and in a random meeting, they told us their need.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_02: They have a 17-year-old who needs a home next year.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_02: She got a visa to study school to come to school here as a freshman in college.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_02: And so the week after our daughter moves out, this new daughter moves into our home.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_02: And it just feels so natural to share what we have.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_02: We have an extra room.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_02: We we love this family, and we get to be an answer to their prayer.
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_02: And I know that God will be an answer to our prayer, that God will give our daughter a family away from home while she's in college to do the same.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that that's how we change the world by changing one person's world.
• 42:30
  SPEAKER_02: And that's the that's the message that I would love for people to take away from this.
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_02: That it doesn't have to be this gigantic life-altering decision.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_02: It's just these daily small yeses to see the needs of others and what how can we meet them?
• 42:45
  SPEAKER_02: How can we serve them?
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_02: And then what happens is God uses that to change us and and to fulfill us.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_02: And and I think that's really our purpose.
• 42:55
  SPEAKER_02: That's beautiful.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, whether or not it feels radical, it could be radical to someone else.
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly, exactly.
• 43:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's beautiful.
• 43:05
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Kristen.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for being willing to um do something way back in 2010 when you left um Kenya and starting all of this and also just using uh your words to communicate a really um much needed message uh in a really beautiful way.
• 43:25
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's wonderful and excited to share for sure.
• 43:31
  SPEAKER_01: All right, we wish you the best of luck and all good things.
• 43:35
  SPEAKER_01: All right, thank you.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much, Kristen.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_01: I hope you feel inspired and encouraged to put your faith into action today.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_01: Wherever the lore has placed you, and no matter the resources you've been given, we are all given an opportunity to share the gifts that we have.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_01: And as usual, I'll put all the links in our show notes to follow Kristen and to purchase her newest book, and maybe even pick up a few for others if her message resonated with you.
• 44:01
  SPEAKER_01: And for your moms out there, we have ideas core to create more meaningful moments for your kids.
• 44:07
  SPEAKER_01: So, if you haven't already, grab our July calendar with 31 ideas that are connected to the kids of December.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_01: And pretty soon we'll have one for August as we finish these close and phase and get ready for the news cooler.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_01: So you can get the news podcast and limit their releases, and that way you can also give us a fifth rating, which really helps us.
• 44:33
  SPEAKER_01: Truly, each of the ratings and ideas and shares are really important to us and valuable as well.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_01: So, until next week, we hope you'll be joining us as we discover more ways to build a simply whole card advice.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_01: Complicate, purposeful, and intentional.