Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / 5-MINUTE FRIDAY: How Do You Balance Dating & Being a Morning Person?

Transcript

5-MINUTE FRIDAY: How Do You Balance Dating & Being a Morning Person? · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, Emily Abadi here coming to you live, not
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: from the AG studio. In fact, I am live from
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: my Baltimore hotel room. I'm down here to give a
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: little chat, do a little speaking engagement at a conference.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: And I feel really just like I'm super smiley sitting
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: here recording this because it feels good to be flexing
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: some muscles that I haven't flexed in a while. I
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: cannot even tell you in what felt like the earlier
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: phases of hurdle. I mean, it's been a global pandemic
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: for the past two years, but how often I was
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: traveling with my microphone, not just to interview people, but
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: to be able to record intros and just content and
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: whatnot when I was on the go, going absolutely everywhere.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: And so a piece of me just feels like really
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: whole sitting here doing this right now, talking into this
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: thing and thinking about you know, what was and what's
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: what will be, what's coming down the pipe.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: I digress.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: I'm getting super emotional and sentimental here, but today I'm
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: I'm having a laugh and I'm here to share it
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: with you. In that this morning, I received a DM
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: from someone who asked me how do I keep up
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: my early morning routine and date. Oh my gosh, I
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: had a laugh on in My immediate response to her
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: was that I don't date, which was me being a
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: little bit sarcastic. That's not entirely true, but I do
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: feel like this is a really good topic to just
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: drive on for a little bit here on five minute Friday. Now,
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: there are a lot of I want to say, like
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: caveats and things to take into sideration when it comes
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: to navigating dating and a social life overall, and your
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: early morning routine, but specifically when it comes to finding
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: the right partner. I know in my heart that the
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: right partner for me will know how much my mornings
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: mean to me and understand and respect that they are
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: a critical part of how I show up during the
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: rest of my day and they make me feel like
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: me and it's my opportunity to get back to myself,
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: specifically really when it comes to journaling and my workout
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: and just having that time before everything gets really crazy.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: The right partner will see that and know that it's
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: important to me and not try to get me to
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: flex on this boundary that I have set up for myself. Now,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: when you're just getting to know someone like you can't
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: expect them to just automatically have all the intel on
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: you and your boundary is so yes, like I understand
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: how dating can make you feel frustrated about keeping your
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: morning routine and whatnot.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: With that said, there is a way to do both.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: Like maybe if you are going on a date or
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: two a week that I just cannot even imagine doing
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: that myself, But I respect every woman who is making
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: this a priority for them in that way.
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: If you're going on a.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Date or two a week, then maybe you put those
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: dates on like specific nights where you know that you
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: aren't going to really want to get up and get
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: out the next day. I have two days during the
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: week where I don't run. I just lift, And if
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be strategic about the night that I
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: maybe wanted to have an extra drink or two, I'd
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: probably do that on the night before those days, because
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I know that I'm not trying to hit the ground
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: running literally in the morning. Worth highlighting here, I do
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: not expect to find a partner that wants to get
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: up with me or work out with me. I think
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: it's probably best that we don't always do those things together.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: But they just can't make me feel guilty or some
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: kind of way that I'm doing something wrong by maintaining
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: a ritual, a habit, a series of habits that make
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: me feel whole. Also, this is starting to sound like
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: a personal ad, so please do not take this that way.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: I please don't. I'm not going to sit.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Here and give you my type. This is why I
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: never talked about dating on the show, because it makes
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: me feel the most most awkward. And something else that
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: I chatted about with this woman over DM is I
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: don't know when it comes to dating for me right now,
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: Like I won't lie, I'm on a few of these apps,
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: but I'm really hopeful that I can meet someone in
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: my real world. I really don't. I would rather there's
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: nothing wrong with online dating. Let me say it this way,
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: there's absolutely nothing with online dating, especially during a pandemic.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: It's been such a really great way to connect and
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: meet people. But I am so hopeful that, like, if
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: I am just putting this energy into the world and
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: I am truly being an inviting of that type of
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: relationship into my space, then it'll come.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: And I know it's not a.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: Full proof strategy, but it's I've had a couple of
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: conversations about this recently, one like focusing on who I'm
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: being rather than what I'm doing, And if I'm being
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: who I want to be, then the things in my
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: life that I am hoping for and working toward like
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: they're going to come to me easier, i e. The
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: power of manifestation. And then also the word inviting. I
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: may have talked about this here on the show, or
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: I may have just talked about it on TikTok, but
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: I had a really great conversation with a friend a
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago, and he said to me that
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: there's a difference between being open and being inviting, and
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: him and I both agreed that although we had been
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: open when it comes to dating over the last couple
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: of years, we probably haven't been as inviting as we
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: could be. So what does that look like in practice?
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: It means like making it a priority, making space for it,
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: like actually like being aware of what's going on as
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: you walk around in the streets instead of like staring
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: down at your phone and thinking to yourself like today
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: could be a day that I meet someone great and
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: having a cynical attitude toward it, of course, like even
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: more inviting would be like being really active on dating
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: apps or making it more of a priority to go
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: out and put your in spaces where put yourself in
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: spaces where other single people could be and you know what,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: to each their own. But open versus inviting something I
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: have been thinking a lot about lately. And the last
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: thing I'll say on this whole dating note is that
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: you you got to decide what's right for you. I
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: firmly believe that all the work that I've been doing
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: on myself during these seasons where I have been single,
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: it's all working for me, and it's all going to
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: help me find the right person for me whenever that
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: person comes into my space, whenever it works out. And
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: I'm just trusting the process and moving forward with grace,
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: compassion and a steady morning routine. All right, my prompt
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: for you this week, what is one of your boundaries
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: that you are not willing to flex on?
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: And have you been flexing on it a little bit
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: more than you should be lately?
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: Again? What is one of your boundaries? Maybe it's a habit,
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: maybe it's a practice that is really really important to
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: you that you don't like to flex on. And have
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: you been honest with yourself about maintaining that boundary lately?
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: And now a listener question.
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: Hi, Emily, this is Molly from Bethesda, Maryland. I am
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: a big hurdle fan. I've been listening for over two
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: years now and your show gets me through a lot
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: of runs, so thank you. My question for you is
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: have you ever thought about doing a group run or
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: some type of event in Washington d C. I know
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: it seems like you have a good friend here, so
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: you come here kind of often, and I know that
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: you've done some of those group runs and some of
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: the other bigger cities like Chicago and New York. But
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: Bethesda is right outside of DC, so I definitely make
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: it over there if you chose to do one. And
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: kind of on top of that, have you ever run
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: a race in Washington d C. I love running here
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: and I've run many races, so if you haven't, you
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: should think about it. Thanks bye.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: I am so I'm laughing that this question came in
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: this week because I have excellent, excellent news. I have
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: never run a race in DC, but I have Marine
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: Corps on my radar at some point. But I am
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: actually going to be back in Washington, d C. For
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: a nighttime event. It's going to be like a hurdle
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: live a chat if you will on March sixteenth. So
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: if you are in the Washington DC area, save the
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: date March sixteenth. I promise you I will have more
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: details asap in New York. Finally, stuff in Boston and
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: this morning if you're listening to this bright and early
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: before the meetup in Baltimore, we're running in Baltimore. So
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: getting back to being in community, it means so much
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: to me, and I'm so a truly, truly, truly, truly
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: I can't say that enough blows my mind that I
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: can pop up in cities and that there is community
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: not just waiting for me, but community for each other. Now,
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: on that note, I do want to make sure that
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: I plug the Hurdler's Facebook group. I'm gonna link it
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: in the show notes. It's actually in the show notes
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: every single episode. But if you are looking for people
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: in your community to be friends with, or work out with,
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: or talk with like, please head in there. Look for
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: Hurdlers in your area, befriend them. It is so special
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: to me that I have created this thing that can
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: provide that for all of you, so get active in there.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, who that's it for this week. Thanks all for
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: listening to me. I appreciate you, I'm grateful for you.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: I love this thing. At Emily a Badi at Hurdle Podcast,
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: another hurdle conquered. Catch you guys, Next time to masure