Latest / R.E.A.L. Talk for REAL L.Y.F.E. / Vexed by Their Version of You

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Vexed by Their Version of You · R.E.A.L. Talk for REAL L.Y.F.E.

• 0:00
  Welcome to Real Talk for Real Life.
• 0:03
  Realizing everyone is always learning and living your full experience.
• 0:10
  This is where we live out loud, on purpose and with purpose.
• 0:15
  I'm Coach C, your host, and this is your Motivational Monday episode,
• 0:21
  Vexed by Diversion of You.
• 0:24
  Some people are not frustrated with you. They're frustrated with the version
• 0:28
  of you they created in their own mind.
• 0:31
  And baby, those are two completely different people.
• 0:36
  And on this Motivational Monday, the message is simple.
• 0:40
  Stop being vexed by their version of you.
• 0:44
  I know, easier said than done. because when people misunderstand us,
• 0:49
  mislabel us, misquote us, or reduce us to one moment, one mistake, one disagreement.
• 0:58
  One boundary, or one season, our natural instinct is to defend ourselves, to explain,
• 1:06
  to over-explain, to prove, to correct the narrative, to convince people we are
• 1:13
  not who they decided we are.
• 1:15
  But let me save you some emotional overtime this Monday morning.
• 1:19
  Some people are committed to misunderstanding you because the truth about you
• 1:24
  inconveniences the story they want to tell themselves.
• 1:28
  At some point, we have to stop auditioning for acceptance in rooms that already
• 1:34
  handed us a script we didn't write.
• 1:37
  Because here's what happens. The more time you spend fighting people's distorted
• 1:42
  perception of you, the less time you spend becoming who you're actually called
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  to be. And that's exhausting.
• 1:50
  Some people will call your boundaries attitude.
• 1:53
  Some people will call your healing selfishness. Some people will call your silence weakness.
• 1:59
  Some people will call your confidence arrogance.
• 2:03
  Let them. Because trying to control everybody's opinion of you is like trying
• 2:08
  to sweep leaves during a windstorm.
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  Pointless work. You'll be outside all day emotionally tired with nothing to
• 2:18
  show for it but frustration.
• 2:20
  And let's be honest, sometimes we're not even fighting for clarity.
• 2:24
  We're fighting because we want to be understood by people we love.
• 2:29
  That's the real thing. But maturity is recognizing everybody does not have the
• 2:35
  emotional capacity, self-awareness, or willingness to see you accurately.
• 2:41
  And that is not your life assignment to fix. In this season,
• 2:45
  we are focusing forward.
• 2:47
  Forward growth, forward peace, forward healing, forward purpose.
• 2:54
  Not backwards defending ourselves to people committed to an outdated,
• 2:59
  incomplete, or convenient version of us.
• 3:02
  You do not owe endless explanations for becoming healthier. You do not owe a
• 3:07
  dissertation every time you choose yourself.
• 3:10
  And you definitely do not owe access to people who only feel comfortable with
• 3:14
  a version of you that lack boundaries.
• 3:16
  That version of you retired.
• 3:19
  So on this Motivational Monday, stop carrying the pressure of correcting every
• 3:25
  rumor, every assumption, every cold shoulder, every twisted perception.
• 3:31
  Let them. Let them misunderstand. Let them watch from a distance.
• 3:37
  Let them create stories. Let them stay confused if they choose to.
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  Meanwhile, you stay focused. You stay grounded. You stay growing.
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  You stay becoming. Because the people assigned to your life will learn your
• 3:54
  character through consistency, not your defense speeches.
• 3:59
  Here's your fearless homework. Ask yourself, where am I emotionally exhausting
• 4:05
  myself trying to prove who I am?
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  And then challenge yourself to redirect that energy into becoming instead of
• 4:13
  convincing, because your peace is too expensive to keep paying with explanations.
• 4:20
  And remember, don't get vexed by their version of you when you already know who you are.
• 4:26
  This is Real Talk, where we're realizing everyone is always learning and living your full experience.
• 4:35
  This is Coach C. I'll see you in the next one.