Latest / The Christian Reeve Podcast / Understanding Cats With Una Hartzell-Baird | The Christian Reeve Podcast | #153 |
Transcript
- 0:00Hello and welcome to another episode of the Christian.
- 0:03We've podcast. Today's guest is a business
- 0:05owner, entrepreneur CEO of Clone Dom's.
- 0:08I think I said that correctly and name is UNA Hartzell bed.
- 0:12She's welcome to the show how you did.
- 0:16Thank you so much. I am fantastic.
- 0:19And you have passed the first test, which is pronouncing.
- 0:22My last name is spot on. Excellent, 10 points. 10 out of
- 0:2610 and points to Gryffindor. Fantastic.
- 0:29No, I mean, yeah. I always try to make an effort
- 0:31with people's names because it's that name it's, you know, really
- 0:35do it. It's funny like when you start
- 0:37having a conversation with someone because I get this a
- 0:40lot. I mean, it's not my name is not
- 0:42difficult to say but the thing that always bothers me that
- 0:45people do with, my name is on forms or eats Jenna.
- 0:49Actually, here's a really good example of what I mean.
- 0:51So my name is just Christian Reef.
- 0:53That's it. You go anywhere online.
- 0:55That's how my name is. That's My Name.
- 0:57Okay, but people take it upon themselves to To add like an S
- 1:01at the end of Reeves or, you know, that I can forgive the
- 1:05spellings of Christian because it's about like a million
- 1:07different ways. That's fine.
- 1:08But plus it's for I don't even understand the spelling of my
- 1:11name is got a silent h. Why English language, but yeah,
- 1:19that that somehow bothers me because I have most of the time.
- 1:22I just let it go. But every once in a while, if
- 1:24I've been on someone show, I'll just be like like I had recently
- 1:27always on someone's shoulders like they introduced me as
- 1:32Christian Reeves and I was like It's not my name.
- 1:36It's like it's not yeah, that's not my name.
- 1:40Lumen song goes through my head a recent.
- 1:44Well, yes, totally and if someone named Luna who, so I'm
- 1:49originally from Bosnia. I was born in Sarajevo and my
- 1:52family came to the states as refugees.
- 1:56And so, my name Luna is really not super uncommon and you can
- 2:03hear it across many. In countries, but in the u.s.
- 2:08Because that new sound is not as familiar.
- 2:11It's always Yuna or Puma because the, you and the n and it's
- 2:16just, yeah, if it can be messy, but names are totally important,
- 2:21right? What they find the M.
- 2:24This is an end. Well, you know, I was cursed
- 2:29should be born after Uma Thurman.
- 2:31So it's kind of top of mind and people try to make those
- 2:34connections in their heads. And sometimes it doesn't quite
- 2:37work out. So okay.
- 2:40So you said like you were born originally imposed you and your
- 2:42family moved over. So, what age were you?
- 2:44And when you moved over, well, I mean, since I'm 15 now and that
- 2:48was 30 years ago, obviously, well, before I was born, I was
- 2:52actually nine when we moved to the states.
- 2:55So, okay. Yeah.
- 2:57It was it was interesting because I spoke zero English at
- 3:02that time. Like, I could sing the ABC song.
- 3:05I could say hi and like hello and that was pretty much it.
- 3:08And I got dropped into summer school English as a new language
- 3:13classes and then dropped into third grade.
- 3:17And I sometimes think back on those times and like how did I
- 3:21get through my day? I understood nothing in those
- 3:25early days, but I was really fortunate to have some great
- 3:28teachers at that time. And of course it's like an age
- 3:32where it's very easy for children to pick up language and
- 3:35And I didn't have any other options, everything in my life
- 3:38was English oriented. So people find it really
- 3:41surprising. When they find out that I'm not
- 3:44originally from the states because I speak unaccented
- 3:48Midwestern broadcaster English. I get, I get where you're coming
- 3:53from on that. Like, I grew up in Northwest
- 3:58London on a suburb. So basically, just No in the
- 4:03capital. Like, whenever something you say
- 4:05to someone who doesn't live in London, you said, London that I
- 4:08will normally. But when they see, like, where
- 4:11I'm actually from the lat, okay, is to briefly explain London
- 4:16London's like I suppose like any major city where you've got,
- 4:20like, your core, what you identify as being London, and
- 4:24then there's where everyone else lives.
- 4:27And that's where most people live.
- 4:29That's where I lived. And it's yeah, it's fine.
- 4:31It's, it is what it is. I lived in a fairly decent area.
- 4:37But as far as the axon is concerned, that's the point I
- 4:39want to bring up actually, is like, I think.
- 4:44That takes a great deal of effort and it's influenced by
- 4:46different things. I think part of it was the way
- 4:50my mum spoke part of it was the school I went to and then, you
- 4:54know, just being surrounded by different people in different
- 4:57areas and stuff. So you pick up on these
- 5:00different things but point being you have to spend like a lot of
- 5:04time trying to master it and particularly if you're doing
- 5:09anything that involves like marketing or sales or whatever
- 5:11and we'll get on to Like what what your business is all about
- 5:14in your business career in a bit, but like just want to say
- 5:16like on that note. I think when you're trying to
- 5:19advertise yourself in a business capacity or get that across you
- 5:24kind of like I suppose subconsciously have to start
- 5:27doing that and then you realize consciously you're doing it.
- 5:29You're like, okay. Yeah.
- 5:31This is I need to do this soon. But my message is clearer.
- 5:34I suppose in the most important thing.
- 5:37But right. Yeah and I suppose like for
- 5:40yourself like growing up. The first sort of obstacle is
- 5:44okay. I mean this foreign country and
- 5:46a kid, then obviously you don't think about things in this but
- 5:49maybe some kids, don't know, but most kids, I suppose don't think
- 5:52about these things. These, this deeply it's like why
- 5:54I'm in this situation, you know, you do your best, what the
- 5:57situation, you're in, right? But the key being to try and be
- 6:01understood, you know, I went out when I was living abroad, it was
- 6:05the same thing. You know, how can I be
- 6:08understood? How can I best get to a point
- 6:11where people can And me, I can get the things that I want and
- 6:13need and then we can worry about, you know, exact
- 6:16inflections of way things, sound that everything.
- 6:19But firstly, just to be understood.
- 6:21Yes. Let's communicate the message
- 6:23appropriately. So was that, I mean, you said
- 6:26you had some good teachers, but was there like a good sort of
- 6:29support network overall? Like how quickly we were able to
- 6:33make that transition? So, really within the first
- 6:37couple of years of being in school, and I went to public
- 6:40school. So this was and I actually
- 6:43credit at end of My Success to the public school system that I
- 6:45was part of because of the teachers that they were that
- 6:49were there. And the resources we had
- 6:50especially with the English as a new language program, which is
- 6:54always been so interesting to me because it's not like you have
- 6:57someone who necessarily speaks your native language who can
- 7:01kind of help explain and Coach you on what the Target language
- 7:06that you're learning is about. It's just these people who
- 7:10learned how to teach English as a new language and we did a lot
- 7:15of reading like them reading out loud to me and me reading to
- 7:18them likewise playing games. I remember, this was my
- 7:21introduction to the board game Candyland, which is like a
- 7:25quintessential quintessential like children's game.
- 7:30And this was the thing Shoots and Ladders and Candy Land.
- 7:34Where a huge Part of how I learned to speak English.
- 7:37In addition to watching movies, listening to music.
- 7:40We, we didn't really have cable and like now, cables, barely
- 7:44even a thing, but we didn't really have access other, than
- 7:47to, the public channels. And so I watched a ton of public
- 7:50broadcasting growing up, which you know, Sesame, Street, Rogers
- 7:54Neighborhood, all of these places that had what would be
- 7:58considered really proper English.
- 8:00Slow speech repetition, especially as children re-watch
- 8:04episodes. The things.
- 8:06And so this was, you know, one of the main ways that I picked
- 8:09up on the language and the teachers that I had were really
- 8:12supportive in terms of meeting me where I was right?
- 8:15Because entering third grade, I really didn't speak the language
- 8:18at all. So my assignments had to be at
- 8:22the have a little more grace, dude, them I had missed out on
- 8:26the way English is taught in terms of phonics.
- 8:30And so all of my life, I've read basically understanding like
- 8:34maybe about 40% phonics and the rest was just a lot of exposure
- 8:38and learning through reading through music, things like that.
- 8:43But but when it came to, how quickly I caught on, within the
- 8:47first couple of years, they decided it didn't need English
- 8:50as a new language support anymore.
- 8:52And I was testing above my classmates on average.
- 8:57When it came to standardized tests, which tells you a little
- 9:01bit about my knowledge, but also tells you that I'm a decent
- 9:03standardized test takers. So it's kind of a mixed bag, but
- 9:08super intelligent get my test scores, amazing.
- 9:15It's amazing. Yeah, but I love to talk.
- 9:17And so this was really a way for me being able to communicate
- 9:22with other people was a huge draw and so it just kind of came
- 9:27out of that and came out of tons of practice.
- 9:30And I also love to read. And in my school, we didn't have
- 9:33air conditioning at the time except in the Prairie.
- 9:35So I became a library Helper because I am a smart lady even
- 9:41when I was a nine and ten-year-old.
- 9:43And and so in this just really gave me tons of exposure.
- 9:46And some of my fondest childhood memories are really, of time.
- 9:49I spent at the school library at the public libraries and the
- 9:53access to books and information back in my day.
- 9:56When we couldn't look things up on the internet and really
- 9:59needed to like find an encyclopedia and learn about the
- 10:02Dewey Decimal System and how to find information in the library.
- 10:05Yeah, I remember those days. Those were not fudgy those
- 10:08encyclopedias. We keep that they were kind of
- 10:10fascinating as well. But just remember, just looking
- 10:13for a dictionary ever trying to find the right work.
- 10:17Although I don't know if thesaurus.
- 10:20Because I loved the for Soros to this day.
- 10:23I still love the for Soros. Yeah, there's a writing tool for
- 10:27whatever, especially for songwriting, whatever, you know,
- 10:30but, yeah, I just wanted to pick up on what you were saying about
- 10:34learning languages as far as Practice element is concerned.
- 10:39I think that's, that's really true.
- 10:41I mean, you at least need a few people in your life around you
- 10:45that you can frequently talk with or you need to be living in
- 10:50that place. I remember because I lived in
- 10:54Europe for a few years and I kind of naively thought our
- 11:01well, I still learn the language because I want to but I probably
- 11:04won't need it. I'll probably be out of English
- 11:06and here's the funny thing. So I was learning anyway,
- 11:10because I wanted to because I love languages and culture and
- 11:13history, Allah, all that stuff, just a big nerd basically.
- 11:19And then I'd find myself in these situations where someone
- 11:22wouldn't speak English and I'm like, oh, Our then and enough to
- 11:27so, dig into what I knew, which was always broken, but they knew
- 11:31what I was meant and then I'd get buyer and I would sit there
- 11:36reflecting on it. As let's say I'm on a coach
- 11:38journey and I'm, you know, they've understood me and I'm on
- 11:40the coach now, and I'm sitting there thinking.
- 11:42Wow, if I didn't speak the language, I would have been
- 11:46screwed then and I'd constantly hear these other foreigners in
- 11:50the country. Be like, oh, yeah, you know,
- 11:51it's easy, you know, I get by all the time.
- 11:55Without and I'm thinking, well, you must like, never leave the
- 11:57city center that ever by would even have those problems even in
- 12:01the city centre, which I don't know.
- 12:03Maybe I was just exposed to it, but more than other, no luck of
- 12:08the draw of every, I don't know, but very strange.
- 12:10But yeah, anyway, the pretty girl, who knows?
- 12:13Maybe it was just someone who decided to mess with you and was
- 12:16like, you, I don't speak English.
- 12:17What are you gonna do? Here's what would happen, right?
- 12:22So every, I lived in Estonia for three Years, right?
- 12:26And in Estonian went well, the main, the first one of the first
- 12:31phrases I learnt was because they're ugly.
- 12:33The English are good. Which means can you speak a
- 12:36start English? Right?
- 12:38And because my pronunciation was good.
- 12:41I think they just assumed I was Estonian.
- 12:43So imagine someone like if you assume that someone's of your,
- 12:48you know, from the same country as you and they say, can you
- 12:51speak this foreign language? You're obviously going to be
- 12:53like, yeah. But why, you know and then I'd
- 12:57be like, oh great and then I'd start speaking in English and
- 13:00then that freak them out. They got oh, oh, okay.
- 13:04You're a foreigner know what? But I understood like that.
- 13:08There's a bit of. Yeah, I mean it's learn
- 13:13languages is It's I don't know. I mean, it's how do you fight?
- 13:18Okay, so you learn? Is it Bosnian would be the
- 13:22language? And yes, right.
- 13:24So that's that your mother tongue if you like and then you
- 13:27come to the States, you learn English.
- 13:29Was there like a point where? You know, you fell.
- 13:35Did you ever feel like you were kind of speaking something which
- 13:38wasn't like you per se? Or did you ever feel like the
- 13:43jet was ever a point where you sort of lost when you weren't
- 13:46speaking Bosnian anymore? And it was just English or like
- 13:49told us a little bit about like how it felt speaking this
- 13:52language. And then, you know, do you?
- 13:55I mean, do you still speak was named with family and Etc?
- 13:57Like talk to us a little bit better.
- 13:59Sure. So so my parents even My sister
- 14:03and I were totally fluent in English.
- 14:06Always insisted on speaking Bosnian at home, so that we
- 14:09would keep that up as a language.
- 14:11So to them, we speak it, not as well because as children like we
- 14:19really didn't see the value youth is wasted on the young for
- 14:22sure. And this ability to keep up the
- 14:25language, it made us different. Right?
- 14:26And when you're, you know, 9, 10 11 years old into your team's,
- 14:30like being different is not Not, okay.
- 14:34And so that really like we really pushed back on that.
- 14:37But what I've found interesting over the years is that, you
- 14:42know, I can, I can understand it super well because it's a
- 14:44phonetic language. I can read pretty much anything
- 14:46in it. And this was also part of what
- 14:48was hard about English because Bosnian has a phonetic alphabet.
- 14:53And so each and every letter just makes that single sound and
- 14:57even letters that look like combinations like and and J
- 15:00saying yeah, but they only ever Say yeah, and there's no
- 15:04exception and there's no other rules or anything around that,
- 15:08so that it's really intuitive. Like as long as you know, the
- 15:11sounds each of the letters makes you can read anything with
- 15:16English that was very, very different for us and we would
- 15:19still speak it and we would occasionally travel back to
- 15:22Bosnia to visit family. And so I would find myself
- 15:25watching subtitled TV shows, which I think is far more common
- 15:29in Europe than in the United States, although thanks to like
- 15:32Netflix. In the world wide web.
- 15:33Now, you do get more exposure to International art rather than
- 15:39just us based things. And so I would start off right,
- 15:43reading captions, because I'm watching a telenovela that is
- 15:47not dubbed and I need to be reading the subtitles in Bosnian
- 15:52and I would start and I'd be like missing tons of words in
- 15:55there because I couldn't read as fast, but by the end of our
- 15:58vacation, I was just keeping on top of it because it was pretty
- 16:02much a daily. We practice right on reading and
- 16:04speeding up my ability to read. And so, every like summer when
- 16:08we would go, that would be my course, is like, as I was
- 16:11watching TV, I'd be reading, and I'd be missing things.
- 16:14And then by the end of it, I'd be catching up in these days.
- 16:18What's really interesting is like, it's a total code-switch,
- 16:23and I've read about this some, as well, and totally relate to
- 16:27this experience where I there are parts of my personality that
- 16:31are 100%. Different.
- 16:33If I'm speaking to someone in Bosnian versus if I'm speaking
- 16:37to someone in English and the like the only time and it's
- 16:42really really all so strange like to my sister and I we use
- 16:45English unless there is something sensitive that we
- 16:48don't want someone else like you're out in public and we need
- 16:50to say something, right? That's the only time that we use
- 16:53Bosnian with each other and it still it's like the gears in my
- 16:57brain are grinding and telling me like this isn't who you are
- 17:00with this person. It's like it's hard to switch to
- 17:05the Bosnian brain when I'm with this person that I typically
- 17:08speak English with and especially since we have a close
- 17:11relationship and spend quite a bit of time together.
- 17:13So yeah, so that has been my experience and kind of like
- 17:17observing that as it's happening to me.
- 17:19It feels so strange. I know what you mean.
- 17:24Like there were people I knew when I lived in Estonia that I
- 17:28only ever spoke Estonian with. I never spoke English with.
- 17:32And some of them knew English, by the way, they just insisted
- 17:38on speaking of studying with me, which is fine.
- 17:40Like, I understood. But it's like, no, I'm so bad at
- 17:44this, but yet that you're right. You're into something like,
- 17:48there's something about that. And yeah, I often find as well.
- 17:53Like, sometimes it's just quicker to say things in another
- 17:56language than it is. Like, I find, I remember one
- 17:58time. I was on a farm.
- 18:01Okay, so there's an island off the coast of Estonia called
- 18:04sorry Emma. So there's there's two islands
- 18:06in this one of the islands off and lot of people go there for
- 18:11the summer holidays, lot people owned Farms there and I happen
- 18:14to be on the farm. Visiting different people
- 18:16working on a farm on point, all sorts of fun ensued.
- 18:21Anyway, it was one particular summer and there was a guy there
- 18:24group of friends. And there was a guy there, who
- 18:27was, I believe a language teacher or some description
- 18:30young guy, but he knew like, Nine languages credible and he
- 18:34was talking about how languages work which, you know, it's a
- 18:37fascinated by this and he basically explained and it's so
- 18:42true. It's the best description I've
- 18:43ever heard of English. Because the one thing I learned
- 18:45about Estonian was, it was very straightforward.
- 18:47Like a lot of European languages tend to be quite
- 18:50straightforward. That's where sometimes people
- 18:52think that things come across as blunt, not necessarily as people
- 18:56want to get straight to the point, right?
- 18:58And don't get me wrong, different languages.
- 19:01Like English and Russian very expressive, you know, very
- 19:05expressive lots of ways of saying the same thing and Etc,
- 19:11but when he was talking about English, he basically explained
- 19:13like oh, you know, so sternly and maybe is like this and you
- 19:16know, polish is like this, but English is like you get them,
- 19:23then you finally get that he was right.
- 19:25He's onto it because sometimes I try and I try to be as
- 19:29straightforward as a can be, for the most Depends on the context
- 19:33if we're having a conversation that we are now, I think it's
- 19:35better to be a big expressive and tell a story.
- 19:38I mean that's kind of the whole point, right?
- 19:40And sometimes, you know, when someone just says to you like
- 19:43like, tell me the truth, give it to me straight.
- 19:46That's the time to just get to the point straight away.
- 19:51And with English. I sometimes find that to
- 19:53challenge. Sometimes you need to explain a
- 19:55lot of different things to kind of paint a picture of what you
- 19:58really mean because sometimes it can get lost when you're
- 20:01Unexplained something or whatever.
- 20:03And every language is different in that respect.
- 20:06Like they all function slightly different ways.
- 20:09And yes, this is fascinating and and then they'll be things.
- 20:13I'm sure you can appreciate this as well.
- 20:14Which only makes sense in that culture.
- 20:17Absolutely. Yeah, I think to a great extent
- 20:20culture informs so much of language but language can also
- 20:24very much impact culture. So it's just this kind of
- 20:27ongoing not even so much of a circle as a figure 8 because
- 20:30there's a lot of cross. It's over and there's no really
- 20:33clear delineation between the two but it can get quite messy
- 20:37in that in that as well. And I think another thing is,
- 20:41like, being really intentional about the way you use words and
- 20:45which words you choose, when you do have more than one option,
- 20:48and how you can really structure.
- 20:52I think, in English, this, of course, is the case as well.
- 20:55But like, you can really structure the way you want
- 20:59someone to perceive what you're saying.
- 21:01Based on the words that you're using, right?
- 21:04You can talk about the same subject in so many different
- 21:07ways and just like a slight tweak of your word choice.
- 21:12And that also really makes me think about like when we the way
- 21:15we use language, right? Like our teenagers and are baby
- 21:18boomers. I'll speak English, but they
- 21:20speak different dialects of English and how like teenagers
- 21:24when they are speaking, they create their own language,
- 21:28right? And it's wrong, even as as an
- 21:31adult like Like, even if I understand the terminology, that
- 21:35that a teenager is using, it is not right for me to use.
- 21:38It is not mine to use ago. You mean, and I didn't totally
- 21:46internalize this until I was watching a TV show on Netflix
- 21:49recently where this was happening, and I was like, I
- 21:51know that this is a little bit like farcical anyway, because
- 21:55that's, you know, that's the art of this show but like, oh, I get
- 21:59it. I get it.
- 22:00We're not supposed. You use that language.
- 22:02That is there's this is how they're carving their place in
- 22:05the world and taking some ownership and control and a
- 22:09time, where many things feel very out of control for a lot of
- 22:13teenagers and where they are trying to be more independent.
- 22:15So they have their own coded language in the same ways,
- 22:19Industries do, right. You can go to an industry
- 22:21conference and no one is speaking English, right?
- 22:24Because they're all speaking in acronyms and initialisms and
- 22:27they know what they're talking about.
- 22:28But if you're not familiar with their language, you have no
- 22:31clue. What's going on?
- 22:33I'm not come from the business world so I can totally relate to
- 22:36that. And the see the difference is
- 22:38with teenagers, and did those acronyms and whatever?
- 22:41Sometimes it's to make things quicker.
- 22:42Sometimes it's just you know, we all have that as you said,
- 22:45generationally the difference business conferences as business
- 22:49people. I'm sorry.
- 22:50A lot of the time they're doing that to sound more.
- 22:58Yeah. I said I get is more intelligent
- 23:00than they actually are or saying.
- 23:01Something when the not everyone, but in many cases, I'll give you
- 23:05an example. There's this guy raises his
- 23:09name, something cynic or something is like a major C?
- 23:12Vitamin cynic. Yes, you know the guy I'm
- 23:15talking about and I drank the Kool-Aid occasionally.
- 23:18I did, you know what? When I first saw this guy, I
- 23:22thought he was a bond villain. Nice, like he's a successful
- 23:27businessman. I appreciate, you know, he does
- 23:29what he does. All these motivational talks,
- 23:31right? Right, but then the few times
- 23:33are just sat down and listened to, it really just sat down and
- 23:36listened to him. Read everything from its body
- 23:38language. The things he said the way he
- 23:41spoke, how he structures his conversations?
- 23:44And I feel I listened to a few other people talk about him as
- 23:47well. And I realized he's one of those
- 23:50people that speaks but says nothing.
- 23:55You have a point and he gets to the point.
- 23:57Right? But what he does is he takes you
- 24:01on this like long long long, a story that will get you there
- 24:05and look, don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with
- 24:06storytelling, right? If it's meaningful and real, if
- 24:14you tell a story and it's real and people can see the in the
- 24:18sincerity and what you're saying, they all listen and I
- 24:20appreciate it. Maybe not, everyone will love
- 24:22it. But most people Because people
- 24:25we're not idiots. We can see sincerity.
- 24:26We can feel it. We know when someone's trying to
- 24:30pull the wool over our eyes, right?
- 24:32And when people like that, I feel they try so desperately to
- 24:37kind of paint this idea of hey, it's okay.
- 24:40Come here. I'll teach you, you know, how
- 24:43you need to be in. This is how it is and when I was
- 24:46in this situation and this was happening, but another this is
- 24:49what we did when I had that, he doesn't particular thing where
- 24:52he goes always the same thing. I challenge you to find any
- 24:55speech. Rate doesn't do this.
- 24:57It will have it, will sit here, sit down and the guy lost him.
- 24:59A question about great question and then I'll go.
- 25:03So I was sitting here with 10 or so high-profile Business
- 25:07Leaders. It's always like tenho
- 25:09high-profile people or like the leader of this country or
- 25:14something. Never give names ever.
- 25:16So there's no way of being able to check if any of this actually
- 25:18happened. So I think is my design, but
- 25:22that's how I do it. And the thing is that people get
- 25:25stuck in it. Yeah, I think it's you always
- 25:28got me weary like you listen to, with regards to these like these
- 25:31business conferences business that because some people are
- 25:34worth listening to some people, you know.
- 25:37And I think that again, like I said, trying to repeat myself
- 25:40too much but it does come down to sincerity.
- 25:44Yeah, when I know when I tell a story, I know one of the first
- 25:47things that goes through my head is, yeah, there might be some
- 25:49people that might not believe me, but I feel confident in what
- 25:52I'm saying. I know that this happened and if
- 25:54they questioned me I can give them specific details and then
- 25:57OK, you know, because let's be real, right.
- 26:01It's very easy to lie. But once someone questions you
- 26:04and starts poking holes in your argument very Difficult to
- 26:08quickly lie and come up with a constructed lie.
- 26:11And then remember about the lies, you've taught.
- 26:13This is why you should never lie.
- 26:19Yeah, you know what? I think you just put your finger
- 26:22on what it is that has always bothered me about Simon's work
- 26:27and like I read the book, right? Start with why?
- 26:29And I was like, but this case isn't actually how things go.
- 26:34You might, you might at some point, find a why that you can
- 26:38leverage, but it may not necessarily be the thing that
- 26:42you started with. And some things you just do.
- 26:44And there is no. Why other than that you want the
- 26:46end result of like making money. In your life easier.
- 26:50Some other thing. I'm not thinking of right now,
- 26:52right? And it's just I just had so much
- 26:54trouble, really connecting with his message.
- 26:58Obviously, he's found, he's found an audience out there.
- 27:02But like the person I connect with is brene brown and if we're
- 27:06going to talk about sincerity, I feel like she's the antithesis
- 27:12of, you know, like Brave leadership and vulnerability and
- 27:17all of these things are the antithesis.
- 27:18Of this like tiny book and superficial research in my
- 27:25opinion. I agree with you and I don't
- 27:28wanna spend the whole podcast going on about this guy.
- 27:30But I do, I do want to throw another thing in there.
- 27:32Like this story that came to me as we were speaking.
- 27:35There's one particular story, he told right where it was like a
- 27:40situation where he's apparently in some sort of meeting and he
- 27:45you know, he hits he does this thing where he Just to kind of
- 27:49get the, the other person on board to like him, right?
- 27:53It's like haha, you know, I was in a business meeting, you know,
- 27:57like we all hate business meetings, right?
- 28:00Sit there and don't know what's going on, you know, and like
- 28:06this sounds really mean if you go watch his stuff, you'll see
- 28:09what I mean is, I'm not, I'm not making this up.
- 28:12Loads of people have come across the problem with this, right.
- 28:16You should never try and like get people to like you.
- 28:18Should just be yourself be real be sincere and because people
- 28:23love you or hate you either way, but people appreciate sincerity.
- 28:27As you said there are people that do that and and that will
- 28:30come through and more people will be willing to listen to
- 28:33your message and what you have to say, cause you're being
- 28:35sincere and that's inspiring. When you're like this going,
- 28:39you're making up stories like the one I'm going to tell it.
- 28:42It's like why like, I don't know maybe it did happen.
- 28:45But it just the way he tells it to sounds wrong like he's in
- 28:48Meeting apparently, and he doesn't understand what's going
- 28:53on. Right, fair enough.
- 28:55Okay. So he, you know, ask a question.
- 28:59He says, hey, could you explain this?
- 29:01I didn't get this blah, blah, blah, right?
- 29:04And apparently then, By some stroke of Miracle.
- 29:10Suddenly, everyone in the room is putting their hand up and go.
- 29:13Oh, yeah, I didn't understand it either.
- 29:15Oh, I didn't understand. It just sounds like something
- 29:17from a movie. It's not right?
- 29:19Because that's not look that's not how real life Works.
- 29:22Real life Works. People are people, you know know
- 29:27about professionalism. What does that really mean?
- 29:29Professionalism is like Trying not to get personal feelings
- 29:35involved with business and to think about the bigger message.
- 29:40And not and try to do good business, like that's kind of at
- 29:44the core of it. Right?
- 29:46But the reality is, there is always a motion involved in
- 29:50business in everything that we do.
- 29:52The key is to kind of keep control of it because that's in
- 29:56a part. How you keep leverage?
- 29:58That's, you know, for example, I've worked in in certain
- 30:02companies where, you know, someone loses their temper and
- 30:05they shout someone berate them and their manager or something.
- 30:09Most people looking at that and see it, for what it is, which is
- 30:12that manager is now lost their power.
- 30:15They don't have because they've they've that's not a
- 30:19professional way to deal with your problems, professional way
- 30:22to deal with your problems is to sit and talk with people and
- 30:26communicate that message and if they don't get it straight away,
- 30:32try again, they don't You know, you call it quits, you do
- 30:36whatever, you know, that's business, but it's like, and I
- 30:40understand, like, don't get me wrong it in business, like
- 30:42certain things happen that are unfair their own, just what
- 30:45unjust and stuff. And you do have to call that out
- 30:49and I dressed up but like for example in that example that
- 30:56that's Annette guy gave like I can I've been in a situation
- 31:00like that. Before if you question the
- 31:01speaker, the first thing I probably say is Why are you
- 31:05interrupting me? Like save the questions to the
- 31:07end? That would be number one or
- 31:08number two, it be like well, I don't have time like because he
- 31:12what he said it was basically it was being explained in really
- 31:15complex terminology and he needed it to be done down a
- 31:17little bit which is that's not unreasonable.
- 31:19Right? But the reality is if it's
- 31:22something like really complex asked to get the meeting notes
- 31:26afterwards and sit for it and go for it, you know, like stuff
- 31:29like that holds up the meeting for maybe some other people that
- 31:33do understand and get And you know what?
- 31:35I mean, like, I'm not saying you shouldn't put your hand up and
- 31:39ask questions and stuff. But I just hear something like
- 31:42that and I see the way he speaks and I have to sing it so many
- 31:47times over the years when it's been, especially when you get
- 31:50like a comp, like a manager who's introducing, like a new
- 31:55project that everyone's going to work on or like they're talking
- 31:57about but a particular particular like Financial
- 31:59quarter and how we how we been and and they'll say you know,
- 32:04this is How it's been. And this is what we're heading
- 32:06towards. And you're sitting there
- 32:06thinking. Well, I've been working on this
- 32:09project for the last six months and my experience was not that
- 32:13my experience was. This was hell, and that was what
- 32:16everyone else is experience was. But what your painting is, this
- 32:20idyllic picture that everything was great and Rosie and it's
- 32:23like, what, what? So I don't know.
- 32:28I mean, maybe it's just that one particular guy.
- 32:32There's plenty of business speakers that are The real deal.
- 32:38Have you talked to have you done much, Tim public speaking as in
- 32:42like talking about, you know, your successes in business and
- 32:47what you've learnt for Business Etcetera.
- 32:49Yeah. I've done public speaking, both
- 32:51in terms of business related things.
- 32:55But in also my personal story, especially because where I am
- 32:59locally I've helped to work with the organization that was The
- 33:05sponsoring nonprofit who helped my family get set up here and
- 33:09they had a large a milestone anniversary, a few years back
- 33:13that I actually did some speaking around that around our
- 33:17experience, as refugees in my personal experience, as a child
- 33:21coming to the u.s. And then also, I've given
- 33:24presentations like that to other companies as part of their
- 33:27diversity equity and inclusion trainings.
- 33:30And I feel like to do that is also a point of privilege
- 33:33because I'm white young and female and these are things that
- 33:40feel more approachable to others.
- 33:42And so they can look at me and be like, oh, the success story
- 33:45right while also ignoring systemic racism and other issues
- 33:49that don't allow other people to succeed.
- 33:53In the same ways. I had the benefit of being able
- 33:56to blend in visually with a group in power in the place that
- 34:00I came to write and many other people when they make these
- 34:04decisions these Awful gut-wrenching decisions to leave
- 34:06their home for their own safety to leave the place that they
- 34:10call home. May be choosing a lesser evil
- 34:14and not actually something better for themselves.
- 34:18And so I feel like that's such a huge part of when I talk as well
- 34:22as to acknowledge that privilege in to say like hey, you're
- 34:24looking at me and you're feeling really great about the story.
- 34:27But also, let's not forget that all people deserve to have
- 34:30dignity food and shelter Health Care, you know, access to clean
- 34:34water and Medicine. Listen and regardless of what
- 34:36they look like where they come from or what you believe their
- 34:39value is because inherently as human beings on this planet, we
- 34:42have value and whether we agree or disagree on how things should
- 34:47be done, right? These are some Basics.
- 34:50And please remember that, there are people who don't look like
- 34:53me, who are doing, you know, who have these struggles, who have
- 34:56increased struggles, because of that.
- 34:58And I know my parents were, you know, taken advantage of, and
- 35:02discriminated against because they Have as good of English,
- 35:06right? And when you hear someone
- 35:08speaking broken or accented English, you make assumptions
- 35:12about who that person is, right. And you don't necessarily know.
- 35:16You don't know. Intelligence level from
- 35:17someone's ability to speak a language.
- 35:19They're not necessarily correlated in the way that you
- 35:22think, right? Because there's also an aspect
- 35:24of opportunity there. Right?
- 35:26Did they have the opportunity? Do they have access to, you
- 35:31know, to schooling and adequate ways?
- 35:33Do they have the time as an adult?
- 35:34Not coming as a refugee or an immigrant to do this or are they
- 35:38surviving and helping their families to survive in that in
- 35:41that respect? So, I'm I, like I mentioned, I
- 35:45love talking and I love language and I never outgrew the phase of
- 35:50childhood were puns, are just hilarious and the greatest humor
- 35:54and this is why condoms exists today.
- 35:58Because I had a cat that wanted to like he had overactive ear
- 36:03wax glands and truly. This was the most unfortunate
- 36:08cat. I have ever had enter my life
- 36:11because when we got him from a shelter, we were just going to
- 36:14Foster him. His name was Snowball.
- 36:17Snowball was not a pure white cat snowball, had some darker
- 36:21spots on him. One of them was unfortunately
- 36:24placed right on his butt. And he was just like this most
- 36:29unfortunate cat who was also overweight and couldn't clean
- 36:32himself. And so he dragged his butt on
- 36:35the carpet. Bit like a dog.
- 36:37Oh, yeah, and he had these overactive earwax glands and
- 36:41would scratch at his ears and it was like a scene.
- 36:44If you've seen or heard of the show, Dexter.
- 36:47It wasn't blood splatter on the walls.
- 36:49And I was like, this is not okay.
- 36:52Oh, so I got these little cloth caps to put on there and as I'm
- 36:56like holding him down and putting these clock caps on.
- 36:59I'm like, hey, it looks like a little claw condom.
- 37:04It's a cloth. And um, and because I am truly a
- 37:08nine year old at heart and will forever be.
- 37:10I was like, this is fantastic. I want to like, make these and
- 37:17have a brand because these, you know, there are brands that are
- 37:19out there and popular in the US. And I was like, but what's
- 37:22missing here, right? And what was missing for me is
- 37:25that all of these brands are like, this is such a great
- 37:27solution and here's how you do it and it's so easy and like
- 37:30but, you know, be aware some cats might not like it or you
- 37:33might need a second person, too. Usually to help hold them down
- 37:37lies. All lies.
- 37:39This is honestly like For the Love of Animals.
- 37:43This is a product that's used by people who, you know, feel like
- 37:47declawing is an inhumane thing to do to a cat.
- 37:50But they really need a solution because they have a baby or they
- 37:54have other pets. I have a friend who the cat took
- 37:57the dogs. I because they had Claws and
- 38:01they were fighting and the dog lost an eye because of it.
- 38:05And so it's a great solution, but like you probably ought to
- 38:09have the beverage of your choice nearby and you might definitely
- 38:13need like a kitty straight jacket, so that they'll hold
- 38:16still. And ultimately, a lot of people
- 38:18actually just decide to have their vet, or their groomer
- 38:21apply it because they last, like, six to eight weeks, they
- 38:24come with like this heavy-duty adhesive and, and it's just a
- 38:28lot easier if someone who does this, a lot, does it for you?
- 38:31And I felt like the sincerity and the acknowledgement of the
- 38:34reality of this. Product was lacking and I was
- 38:36like we are going to be like the brand that gives it to you
- 38:40straight. And so that's really reflected
- 38:43in our instructions and like, hey, yeah, not all cats will do
- 38:46well with this. You may not do well with this
- 38:49and that's not a moral failing. And of course like lots of dad
- 38:54jokes and jokes about sex. And you know, it's it's
- 38:59something that like I felt was missing the sincerity, but also
- 39:04I am a huge believer. Weaver.
- 39:05And like my background, my education is a non-profit and I
- 39:09think that there's like a huge aspect of corporate
- 39:12responsibility that comes down to really giving back to
- 39:16communities and keeping things sustainable.
- 39:19And so like my goal was to remove this heavy duty packaging
- 39:24that comes with a lot of these products that you see like
- 39:27commercially available. So our product comes in a dime
- 39:30bag because all good things, come in dime bags and it really
- 39:35Reduces the footprint and we give 10% of the proceeds of our
- 39:40net profits to animal Charities. So I'm trying to like live the
- 39:45life that I would want my kid to live down the line, and to have
- 39:49a balance between sincerity humor.
- 39:53Joy, and having some sustainability in the world
- 39:57where I feel like the difference.
- 39:58I've made is positive and it's going to make a good impact and
- 40:02we've seen, you know, what's been happening in you.
- 40:05Crane lately. It was almost kind of
- 40:07unbelievable. A lot of people were thinking
- 40:09like, oh, this will never happen.
- 40:10And then here we are. And one of the stories that
- 40:13we're seeing coming out, is there are so many people who are
- 40:18taking their pets with them. And this really resonated with
- 40:21me because when we were leaving, Bosnia to come to the u.s. we
- 40:25had to leave our animals behind, and I had spent some time living
- 40:31away, because my parents were in Sarajevo and they sent my sister
- 40:33and I to live with our A ins on like a family friends farm away
- 40:38from the fighting and so we were separated from her parents for a
- 40:41few years. We had a dog and a cat while we
- 40:44were on this farm and we just we left them behind and that was
- 40:47devastating to us, but there was no practical way for this to be
- 40:52to be something that we're like, we took them back with us and
- 40:56thinking about that and seeing people who are actually, like
- 40:59now, we're to a point where so many people are taking their
- 41:02pets with them. Not only that but all these
- 41:04neighboring countries. Is there animal Charities are
- 41:06coming together to support refugees and Refugee pets?
- 41:10And I was like, this is the thing that like, is healing my
- 41:14heart in terms of what I had to experience.
- 41:17And so instead of donating to US based charity is for the rest of
- 41:21the year are proceeds, will benefit Charities that are
- 41:24supporting Ukrainian pet refugees to try again, to make
- 41:29the world, a slightly better place.
- 41:31And, and I've just, you know, I feel like I can't Health
- 41:35problems entirely by myself, but the pot contributions I make to
- 41:39the world should be overwhelmingly positive for what
- 41:42I can do. And it's like that Serenity
- 41:45Prayer, right? Like, give me the big race to
- 41:48like, make the changes that I can.
- 41:49But also to accept the things that I cannot change.
- 41:53No, first of all, well done. Well done for the I mean, I
- 41:57think there's always something that can be done in some shape
- 42:01or form and a lot of it comes down to To, yeah, reframing the
- 42:06way that you're already doing something.
- 42:08I mean, as you said that, you know, you've got your only got
- 42:10this company that's involved with pets, you know, and it's
- 42:14kind of like a no-brainer to help Charities and Ukraine at
- 42:18this time, and it's actually, you know, it's like a natural
- 42:21kind of words Escape me, you know what I mean, progression,
- 42:28you know, energy is energy. Right.
- 42:35That is what nuts. Yeah.
- 42:37I mean, it's a good thing and it's I think I think on that
- 42:43note actually with regards to what we've seen in Ukraine with
- 42:47the importance of people's pets. I think in general over the
- 42:50years, maybe people's perception of pets has changed.
- 42:54Maybe, maybe. Because it pets, I think animals
- 42:57have always been important to humans and human race Etc.
- 43:00But if you think, like, 200 years ago or whatever like
- 43:04animals, It's almost serve more of like a functional purpose in
- 43:08a many respects. So they were still part of the
- 43:09family. But like, you know, for
- 43:10instance, cats, were expected to get rid of mice in the house and
- 43:14dogs were, you know, supposed to herd sheep and, and those things
- 43:17still happen, but, you know, over the years you find that
- 43:22this differs country to Country. Like I never forget when I was
- 43:25on holiday in Bulgaria. I was in Spring, like 2013 and I
- 43:30was it was there that the first and only time ever did a beach
- 43:33holiday because I can't stand doing this.
- 43:35Like that, I got suckered on to come to that.
- 43:39I wanted to go. Anyway, because cool.
- 43:40It's another country. I love Europe.
- 43:42I love going exploring traveling.
- 43:44I love all that but Beach holiday, but so we're at this
- 43:48like four star hotel. And you know, it's on the
- 43:50beachfront and I remember like the stray dog.
- 43:55Just ran up to me. And I wanted to pet it by
- 43:58remember someone saying to me, like on you shouldn't.
- 44:01I Australian might have fleas and Etc.
- 44:04And like I just remember like how skinny the dog was and and
- 44:11like it was clearly stray and I just kind of blew my mind a bit
- 44:15because we don't really have that in the UK.
- 44:19Like I'm sure there are Strays that, sometimes the animals are
- 44:21get lost or whatever or you know, Miss abused Etc, but
- 44:27Really speaking. We do take very good care of
- 44:29animals in this country. So it's a rarity to see that
- 44:31bit. That's very common or at least.
- 44:33It wasn't I'm in Bulgaria and that was very striking to me as
- 44:36far as like how that's enabled to happen, how that happens.
- 44:41But I think this latest situation with, with animals in
- 44:46the Ukraine, has taught us that you don't people's perception of
- 44:49animals has changed. Like they are part of the
- 44:51family. They are like, why would you
- 44:55live in Pine, you know, obviously in Or situation that
- 44:57was different that you were kids.
- 44:58So you didn't get saying that your parents, you know, they're
- 45:01like, we need to get out of this tough situation.
- 45:04Let's go, you know, you think about those things and you're
- 45:07like this extreme situation, but it's like I think maybe may I
- 45:14guess my point is that maybe that perception is now changing?
- 45:17And, you know, because people change over time and what people
- 45:22value changes over time. I suppose and maybe our
- 45:26perception of animals has changed, maybe hopefully for the
- 45:29better. I mean, so it certainly seems
- 45:30like people are more conscious of things.
- 45:32Like, you know, Animal Welfare these days.
- 45:35I mean, I see a lot of stuff being done to help animal
- 45:39shelters that in the UK. We've got we've got a lot of
- 45:42things. People will push into for people
- 45:45to get animals from rescues as opposed to just buying them, you
- 45:49know, as a puppy or whatever. And I also see a lot of
- 45:54literature in the media about, you know, kind of the negatives
- 45:59of the existence of zoos, for example, which is not always
- 46:03something that you hear spoken about.
- 46:05But, you know, it's true. I mean, You go to a nature
- 46:10reserve, that's a very different experience from going to a zoo.
- 46:15And if you've never been to either, or you only been to one
- 46:17or the other goal, make sure you see both.
- 46:18So you get a real good idea of the difference because yes,
- 46:22yeah, I never forget. I was in Dublin Zoo many years
- 46:26ago in Ireland and there was like a gorilla enclosure and
- 46:32fortunately they had some access to outside but it was one of
- 46:35those deals where some of it was inside.
- 46:37That would be where the glass was where you whatever and then
- 46:41there's an outdoor section, but they didn't have a lot of space
- 46:44and these are gorillas, you know, and it shouldn't be in the
- 46:51zoo anyway, but okay, but I think the thing that stuck out
- 46:56to me was Okay. Yes, they have access to indoors
- 47:00and Outdoors and they have space, but like, they don't have
- 47:02enough space and they've got all these, like, people staring at
- 47:05them and they're not stupid animals at all.
- 47:09I don't know. It's my personal belief.
- 47:10I don't believe animals stupid. I think they're very, very
- 47:12aware. And I could tell, I was at the
- 47:16time I was like 20 or something. And I remember just standing
- 47:18there and this Grill is by the glass looking at everyone.
- 47:22They just looks me directly in the eyes and I just stare at it.
- 47:26And there is, that's just kind of like, Heartbreaking moment.
- 47:32I could almost like feel like the sadness and the gorillas
- 47:35eyes. Like it was like.
- 47:40It's just going on my own feelings here, but it felt like
- 47:44we both understood that this is just an unacceptable situation,
- 47:49like, because I didn't get any Joy from that.
- 47:51I wasn't enjoying the experience.
- 47:52I was just looking at this like well, these animals shouldn't be
- 47:55here. This is unacceptable.
- 47:57Like what? Like and I don't want to be that
- 48:00guy like, you know, I paid to go to the zoo or the end of the
- 48:03day, so it's not like I'm completely on the funding this,
- 48:05you know, but at the end of like these days, I don't I don't ever
- 48:09want to go Mizzou, you know, I don't want her on stuff like
- 48:13that because it just think it's doesn't have a place in today's
- 48:16society. And and the reason I highlighted
- 48:22sanctuaries in rescue centers is because sometimes Like there can
- 48:29be it can be done for the good if what's going to happen if
- 48:33you're taking like an endangered species or you're taking an
- 48:35animal, we're taking care of them.
- 48:37And then with the view to release them back into the wild.
- 48:40I don't think it's that unreasonable that you let people
- 48:42see the animals, like, you know, that's okay because at least
- 48:45they're going to be taken care of and release back into the
- 48:49wild and this is like a temporary solution, you know,
- 48:53versus zoo is just - it's just like so, To the circus is that,
- 48:58it's like, you know. I I definitely see that and I
- 49:03know that circuses have certainly had a very difficult
- 49:06time in recent years, which is great because?
- 49:10Right, and I think, when these things start, it's when we were
- 49:14thinking about, like, you know, we're displaying Curiosities,
- 49:17and, of course, someone's making money off of this, right.
- 49:19This isn't that this was not a charitable Venture here, and I
- 49:23think to an extent zoos are feeling some of that pressure of
- 49:29needing to focus on. Providing more space right to
- 49:33animals and being really selective, in terms of what
- 49:35animals they do feature in what they do and how they do it and
- 49:38focusing on Rehabilitation and conservation.
- 49:40I agree that there need to be lots more changes done there.
- 49:47I also see a bit of a positive to zoos if they're done as well
- 49:51as possible. Now with an idea of growth
- 49:53towards the future because there are kids like me who would never
- 49:58be able to see some of these animals out in the wild and the
- 50:01things I don't see. I don't think to care about.
- 50:05So by having some of these examples, more locally
- 50:08accessible. I know our local Zoo School
- 50:11groups from preschool level all the way up through High School,
- 50:16visit the zoo, you know, and these are opportunities for
- 50:20people to build a broader worldview of the places around
- 50:24the world, the animals, the problems that they face right
- 50:27there. Its habitat, destruction, or
- 50:29poaching. So I think there's room for it
- 50:33to an extent, but I think there's also lots of
- 50:35improvements that need to be made and I agree.
- 50:38I had actually an opportunity to visit an animal sanctuary in
- 50:41Australia and you can definitely see, right?
- 50:44What the difference is in in how those habitats are organized and
- 50:50run and all of these the different and you know,
- 50:52enrichment and opportunities that animals have in those types
- 50:56of habitats. So I tend to like pick a very
- 50:59middle of the road despite. Wearing a totally black and
- 51:02white outfit today. I have a very gray perspective
- 51:04on life and that's not to say that it's an excuse to say like
- 51:08yeah, you know, zoos get to just stay the way they are.
- 51:12And the think this is great and they're Untouchable because I
- 51:14think the minute we make something so sacred that we
- 51:17can't talk about it and can't be skeptical of it and critical of
- 51:21it. It becomes a weapon.
- 51:23It's no longer a tool. It's a weapon now.
- 51:26Yeah, you should be able to criticize anything.
- 51:27Anything is up for Critters criticizing and I suppose Like I
- 51:32get where you're coming from. I think for me because I will, I
- 51:35will bit. Yeah, I have seen a lot of
- 51:37initiatives that zoos feature, and they always make a point of
- 51:42saying. Oh, we're giving to this Cherry.
- 51:44We're helping this, or we're doing this and it's like, they
- 51:46are doing things. But I think the key issue here
- 51:49is like The fact that they're like profiting by a having the
- 51:56animals there, right? Just hear me out on this.
- 52:00See, like, with, with an, with a sanctuary.
- 52:03It's like they take those animals because they're either
- 52:06endangered or they've come across them in the wild and
- 52:10they're like, they need genuine help before they can, maybe
- 52:13they've been like rejected, like a mother lion, cub has been
- 52:16rejected or something and they bring it back into the wild that
- 52:20way, you know, and then you see it.
- 52:22And you see the whole Any you see them, you know, look after
- 52:25the animal and then bring them back into the wall.
- 52:28We've series, they sometimes do that.
- 52:30But mostly the the the objective is taken from the wild.
- 52:36Give them a life in a zoo. That's it.
- 52:39And the goal is to keep Get them to to, you know, to breed and
- 52:47continue and stay in the zoo. And I don't know, like this idea
- 52:51of life in captivity to me, just hits me the wrong way.
- 52:55I think, because while I get what you're saying about all we
- 52:58should have access to be able to see them and stuff and that's
- 53:01beneficial. I agree.
- 53:04But like, I think if, if it was just the animal sanctuaries that
- 53:08existed and that was the way that we saw them.
- 53:11That would send the right message to because it, but okay.
- 53:14Well we have these animals, we're taking care of them.
- 53:17The reason that you're seeing them is because we're taking
- 53:20care of them and this is important and you explain why
- 53:23it's important. There is a zoo.
- 53:24It's like, oh, yeah, we're helping them a bit but they're
- 53:28going to live their whole existence in the zoo.
- 53:31And it's like, yeah, what kind of message does that send?
- 53:34I mean, it's a bit like What? Like, I don't know.
- 53:38And that's that's the only element that I get funny with,
- 53:42like, a zoo can can do all the initiatives.
- 53:44They want help people that all they want.
- 53:46But like, that one fact is sits with me a bit wrong because,
- 53:49like, if zoos with the only thing that existed then maybe
- 53:55you could make a bit of an argument either way.
- 53:57It's still be wrong. But at least you could say, oh,
- 53:58well, there are some zoos are doing something but sanctuaries
- 54:02are like exist and help and then sir.
- 54:05Peppa sitting and release animals back into the wall, and
- 54:08it's almost like a rehabilitation process or
- 54:11assisting them getting them back to wear.
- 54:14They need to be before they're released, you know, so, but I'm
- 54:19not trying to push you into like a opinion because I know
- 54:22sometimes people do that. That's not, that's not my deal.
- 54:24I'm just saying where I sit on that.
- 54:26Yeah. It's very much.
- 54:29So weird one when you when you when you when you deconstruct
- 54:32it, when you really start to like, put a magnifying glass on
- 54:35it. It starts to become a bit like
- 54:36well, why are we doing this? Well, and you know, I think
- 54:40that's like again talking about going back to start with why
- 54:43right? Right zoos didn't start with the
- 54:46why of conservation azuz started with the why of novelty and
- 54:51making money and you know, people find novelty exciting,
- 54:55right? And what a great experience and
- 54:57then they've kind of wandered. Into across time, right?
- 55:01Because of the social pressures of people coming out and saying,
- 55:04hey, it's not right to treat animals this way.
- 55:07Like this is inhumane right to sort of be like, okay.
- 55:11Well, let we ran over rebranding were also doing these
- 55:14conservation efforts and helping with breeding and Rehabilitation
- 55:18but their original. Why is still like there's Echoes
- 55:21of that and not all zoos are created equal, right?
- 55:24And it neither are all sanctuaries like there.
- 55:26There are animal sanctuaries or cat.
- 55:29Sanctuaries where I live that are like, borderline should be
- 55:32shut down by our local authorities because they're
- 55:35really not serving that purpose. But people are fond of using
- 55:39language in ways that serves them rather than ways that
- 55:42reflects the truth. So they call themselves
- 55:44sanctuaries because they know that people will get warm
- 55:47fuzzies about that, if you don't look deeper, but that being
- 55:51said, totally, you can see the difference there and maybe that
- 55:54is evolution of zoos 2.0, is that we're have a push towards
- 55:59More of a sanctuary type of environment and especially
- 56:04because these days like we can have experiences.
- 56:07We don't need to have him personally.
- 56:08I don't need to see that tiger through glass cage.
- 56:11I can have a VR experience at home of seeing tigers and
- 56:16learning about them and seeing them in their natural
- 56:18environment and supporting organizations around the world
- 56:21that are serving animals that maybe aren't, you know, native
- 56:24and maybe shouldn't be in a zoo, local to me because what is a
- 56:27polar bear doing in? The Midwest.
- 56:30Yeah, you know, it's a big one. Yeah, it's one thing.
- 56:33Having like a, like a big cat, or something like an eye patch
- 56:38of grass or whatever. But, come on, man.
- 56:40Penguins. I see that brings me.
- 56:43That's a good point because you mentioned like these big cats,
- 56:45like these big sanctuaries and stuff like that.
- 56:47And it should rhyme reminds me of that whole Tiger King Fierce
- 56:51go, which I'll be interested to get your thoughts on this
- 56:54because we've only touched a little bit on your love of cats.
- 56:57And why Pointy. And I'm sure we'll go into that
- 57:00in a little bit, but I just wanted to get your initial
- 57:02thoughts on that because I think for many of us other than just
- 57:06the pure absurdity of it. Just putting that to one side.
- 57:10Many people were looking at it like, well, here's two sets of
- 57:14people that have a lot of money, and they've decided to make like
- 57:21these big cat sanctuaries and, which were eventually, basically
- 57:24just became zoos. And I believe karabast Baskin
- 57:31asking hers is still operating because I know the the tiger
- 57:35Kings will shut down, but hers is still going.
- 57:38I believe and her justification is always well, you know, we're
- 57:41taking care of them. We're doing this, we're doing
- 57:42that. And the big thing that a lot of
- 57:44people would say in response to that is well.
- 57:46You just shouldn't have them in captivity and first place, you
- 57:49know, it's a very kind of like back and forth situation.
- 57:53But yeah being that you are a big lover of cats and animals.
- 57:57In general, what was your takeaway from that whole thing?
- 58:02I tried to avoid Tiger King as but I did, I mean, obviously, it
- 58:08was unavoidable because it was in, it was in the air, right?
- 58:11Everyone was talking about this and I think my stance words that
- 58:14is the same, that it generally is.
- 58:16Which is, if you are trying to help, right?
- 58:21That's great, but help can definitely hurt at times.
- 58:24And if you want to help a certain Animal person, country,
- 58:29whatever it is. You really have to understand
- 58:32what it is that it needs. And what's the best way?
- 58:35Not for you to help, but what's the best way for that animal
- 58:40person country, whatever area to receive help.
- 58:45And we see this in lots of different humanitarian efforts.
- 58:48And I think, you know, it's a little bit more layered with
- 58:50animals because they can't tell you what they need, but there
- 58:53are lots of people who know who have studied and observed and
- 58:57Live among these animals who have sanctuaries and can tell
- 59:00you. This is the best way to support
- 59:02the species and it's not by putting them in a habitat where
- 59:06you are. It's by partnering with this
- 59:08organization, right? If you have the money to do it,
- 59:11then why not give that money in a sustainable way to other
- 59:14organizations that are doing this work in a way that supports
- 59:18the natural local? Habitats of these animals and
- 59:21addresses their needs in the wild because even like, if you
- 59:24have animals and you let's say, you know, Habilitated them in a
- 59:28sanctuary and you release them back into the wild.
- 59:31What happens after that, right? Have you solved the problems
- 59:36that are in place that have endangered these animals to
- 59:39begin with? And if you haven't, then you're
- 59:41just creating a feeder program for your Sanctuary instead of
- 59:45actually creating Solutions. And so like to me, you know,
- 59:50it's the same thing when people, you know, want to help.
- 59:55Let's say communities that need access to clean water.
- 59:59Well, what is the best way to do that?
- 1:00:02Right? What is the sustainable way to
- 1:00:03do that? And what do those communities
- 1:00:05say? They need to succeed when it
- 1:00:08comes to the sustainability, right?
- 1:00:10And for you, it might be, you know, donating money, right?
- 1:00:14To this particular organization. That's teaching them about how
- 1:00:18to do this. It might be building Wells that
- 1:00:20are closer, so they don't have to walk as far as what other
- 1:00:23problems are being. Solved and what problems can you
- 1:00:26create by imposing your view of that solution?
- 1:00:29Right? And the way people interact with
- 1:00:31things it's going to be based on their culture on their
- 1:00:34experiences and trying to come in and I think the u.s.
- 1:00:38Is guilty of this as well. As anybody else that like you
- 1:00:42come in and you impose what you think is the solution, but that
- 1:00:46actually does more harm than good and you're just wasting
- 1:00:48resources at that point instead of engaging locally and finding
- 1:00:51out like Is this a problem for you?
- 1:00:54How is this a problem? How, what do you think is the
- 1:00:57best way to solve this and with animals again, like you can't
- 1:01:01really ask them necessarily but there are lots of people who are
- 1:01:04quite knowledgeable and engaging with them and saying, I want to
- 1:01:07help and I want to make sure that when I help I also don't do
- 1:01:10harm through that. So yeah, and like there are some
- 1:01:15local farms in our area that are really great.
- 1:01:17You can go and you can like donate and take a tour and I
- 1:01:21looked at one recently and And they they also breed dogs.
- 1:01:25And I'm like our shelters are full of pets, right?
- 1:01:30Loved pets. And abandoned pets.
- 1:01:31That pets that need homes. Why are we breeding dogs?
- 1:01:35And so, for me, that's not a place that I can support because
- 1:01:38they are contributing to what I perceive as a large problem in
- 1:01:41our community. That is straining.
- 1:01:43The resources, right? Not to mention that, like we
- 1:01:47could probably talk for another two hours about why purebred
- 1:01:51dogs are actually probably. Mattock and not something we
- 1:01:54want like we stopped pure-breeding, Royals.
- 1:01:56Maybe we can take that. And Next Step because we already
- 1:01:59know pure breeding animals causes.
- 1:02:01Same types of genetic issues. Yeah, that's a whole as a whole
- 1:02:08pocos right there. Let's let's talk through your
- 1:02:13love of cats. because, I mean, well, I love animals, many
- 1:02:22people listening to this love animals.
- 1:02:24We will have animals for the most.
- 1:02:25Imagine. Most people love animals.
- 1:02:27I'd throw. This is the time when I meet
- 1:02:28someone, it doesn't have animals.
- 1:02:29I'm like, what's wrong with you? It's fair enough.
- 1:02:32Everyone bag. Everyone's different.
- 1:02:34Everyone's different, you know. Yeah, but why are cats
- 1:02:38specifically so important to you?
- 1:02:40What is it about cats? What's the story there?
- 1:02:44So, you know, I think this is like, Asking anybody about like
- 1:02:48why they love? Anything is there's just
- 1:02:50something about it. That calls to my soul.
- 1:02:54Like I love their cute little pointy ears and their cute
- 1:02:57little faces. And the way that they now and
- 1:03:00how Sassy they can be and their personalities, the fact that
- 1:03:03they don't usually smell as bad as dogs.
- 1:03:05Like there's so many things about it, but like, but really,
- 1:03:08you know, one of my first Pat's was this cat that we had on this
- 1:03:11farm and I just like, I just love this cat and aesthetically.
- 1:03:15I find cats married. Pleasing the fact that they have
- 1:03:18this like perceived personality of being like sassy and
- 1:03:22independent compared to dogs that are, you know, just like
- 1:03:27endlessly loyal to their people or, you know, like even an
- 1:03:30aggressive cat, you have some respect for and you're like, oh,
- 1:03:34we better stay away from that cat, but like an aggressive dog,
- 1:03:37that aggression can create, you know, a life-threatening problem
- 1:03:40for that, dog. So, cats just have this like,
- 1:03:43real balance in the world of being In both perceived as
- 1:03:48independent, but can also be quite loving and like and vapor.
- 1:03:52And it's almost like the way you know, if a small child really
- 1:03:56likes you and like engages with you.
- 1:03:57You're like, yes, I made it because children tell no lies,
- 1:04:01right? When it comes their good readers
- 1:04:03of personality and like, if someone's going to be a good
- 1:04:06person to interact with, and I feel like the cats are the same
- 1:04:08way. Like, if your cat likes me, I
- 1:04:10have arrived in the world. And so I've always just love
- 1:04:15them. And they've made me feel joyful.
- 1:04:18And, and I've had like, at one point we had three cats and all
- 1:04:23of my cats were rescues, don't one of them developed
- 1:04:27obsessive-compulsive disorder and would mow his the fur off of
- 1:04:31his stomach. So we got creative about
- 1:04:33anti-anxiety medications for him.
- 1:04:36Another cat. I had had irritable bowel
- 1:04:38syndrome and she was like, kicked out by her previous
- 1:04:40owners, because she wasn't litter box trained, but it
- 1:04:43actually turned out that she had a more serious issue.
- 1:04:46And then poor boy cat. He ended up at the, that was
- 1:04:49Snowball. He ended up at the Humane
- 1:04:52Society because his family got a dog and he can't stay with dogs.
- 1:04:58And so I'm like, but this cat was your first pet, and then the
- 1:05:01dog came around. It feels unfair to get rid of
- 1:05:04the cat. So we had just fostered him for
- 1:05:07a while. Hoping to get him adopted by
- 1:05:09someone and you know, kind of find out his personality, give
- 1:05:12him a break from the shelter, and then when we saw all of
- 1:05:16these, The adorable things. He did like dragging his butt on
- 1:05:18the carpet eating too fast, and throwing up.
- 1:05:21We were like, No One's Gonna Take this cat.
- 1:05:23I have I'm between a rock and a hard place because this cat, I
- 1:05:27can either omit some of these Tendencies.
- 1:05:31Right? That are gonna potentially Drive
- 1:05:33someone up the wall, or I can be honest about it.
- 1:05:36And either way this cat either gets adopted and then goes right
- 1:05:39back to the shelter or doesn't get adopted.
- 1:05:42And he was the biggest cuddle bug ever like He really could
- 1:05:47not take no for an answer and it was a little bit of a problem.
- 1:05:50But he wanted to sit on laps. He wanted to be in your face and
- 1:05:54he also loved carbohydrates. The way I love carbohydrates.
- 1:05:58He would eat pretty much anything.
- 1:06:01French fries, popcorn, scones loved scones, cookies cake,
- 1:06:06anything if it was around he was going to try to take a bite out
- 1:06:09of it and he like genuinely. This was the only time this Camp
- 1:06:13moved fast. So those are just like those
- 1:06:19were my, my little world and my little introduction to being a
- 1:06:23cat caretaker and beyond that. I had the opportunity, a few
- 1:06:28summers ago. I took over for a community cat
- 1:06:32caretaker and four people might not know exactly what community
- 1:06:35cats are. But cats actually live outdoors
- 1:06:38and live in communities outdoors and they are our organizations
- 1:06:43and volunteers, that take care of them that like bring them
- 1:06:45food and water. Everyday that set up shelters
- 1:06:48for them so that they can be insulated from weather and that
- 1:06:51helped to trap and then spay and neuter the cats so that they
- 1:06:54don't keep contributing to the over populations that we see.
- 1:06:57And you mentioned about like, seeing the stray dogs.
- 1:06:59And how we don't see that as much, but we do see Stray Cats a
- 1:07:02lot more often and part of that is because people consider them
- 1:07:07to be harder and more independent, right.
- 1:07:10Dogs. Are these animals that need us
- 1:07:12as much as we need them, but cats can totally make it and
- 1:07:15they can like, Hunt for themselves and get food and
- 1:07:18they'll get birds which topic for another day and like, mice
- 1:07:22and all of these things. And so so this was another area
- 1:07:25where we see issues because people won't spay and neuter
- 1:07:28cats because of the cost. So they will be happy to spend
- 1:07:32$100 to spay or neuter a small dog, like teacup Chihuahua as
- 1:07:37you know, but they will not spend the same amount on you
- 1:07:39amount of money on a cat-like in our area locally.
- 1:07:42It maxes out at about 45 or 50 dollars is what people are
- 1:07:45willing to do. Do and beyond that?
- 1:07:47If you try to charge the actual cost, they just won't do it.
- 1:07:51They're like, well, we don't need to do this and you know,
- 1:07:53the cat gets out or the cat is an indoor outdoor cat and then
- 1:07:57they start overpopulating an area with kittens because cats
- 1:08:01can have kittens as young as 6 months old.
- 1:08:03Like they're already ready to reproduce at that point.
- 1:08:06So it's hidden having kittens, you know, and so this was
- 1:08:11actually the thing that kind of got me thinking about.
- 1:08:13How do I contribute in a positive way and This Gap.
- 1:08:17When it comes to nonprofits. Providing Spay/Neuter services
- 1:08:21and shelters, you know, providing Spay/Neuter services
- 1:08:24to make pets more adoptable. There's this Gap that's being
- 1:08:27covered sometimes by grants, or by federal funding or donations,
- 1:08:31but there's a gap between what's needed to be paid for this
- 1:08:34service for cats, and what's actually paid for by owners or
- 1:08:40or other people who, you know, are taking care of those cats.
- 1:08:43And I was like, this is the place where I can make a
- 1:08:44difference and Take the proceeds that we're making and
- 1:08:49contribute, some of that, to these Charities, to help close
- 1:08:52that Gap in a really sustainable way for, for those animals.
- 1:08:56And then that Cascades down to those cats.
- 1:08:59Have a better life because if you have a tomcat and he's
- 1:09:02spraying all over the place, that cat gets kicked out a lot
- 1:09:05faster, right. If you have kittens, you know,
- 1:09:08what's going to happen to those kittens.
- 1:09:10My first cat was a rescue because she was literally in the
- 1:09:15bag of kittens. Headed to the Ritter River.
- 1:09:18Literally, there was a river behind the farm where we were at
- 1:09:21and someone was walking by and they were like, would you like
- 1:09:23one of these kittens because they were taking them out to
- 1:09:26drown them because they couldn't take care of them.
- 1:09:29And that was what you did. And I think that's a very,
- 1:09:32that's another, you know, like that's 30-ish years ago, that
- 1:09:35all of this is happening, but that is legitimately how people
- 1:09:38solve overpopulation problem. Sometimes is by joining these
- 1:09:42animals. And now, it feels very
- 1:09:43Unthinkable because we bonded, so closely with them.
- 1:09:46And so many people around the world have pets and they
- 1:09:49couldn't imagine doing that right?
- 1:09:51But are our feelings and our interactions with animals have
- 1:09:56gone from more utilitarian to more Humane and acknowledging
- 1:10:00them. As you know, as other beings on
- 1:10:02this planet that also deserve to feel safe and cared for and not
- 1:10:07to go through a lot of pain and torture in their lives.
- 1:10:13Maybe I'll give you that our treatment of animals.
- 1:10:17Now is very much reflective of our treatment of each other in
- 1:10:21many ways. Because if you look at, like the
- 1:10:24way the world used to be, I'm not saying it's going to still a
- 1:10:28lot of work but, you know, like, in general most countries that
- 1:10:33we've come farther than I guess we've ever been before and
- 1:10:40certainly when it comes to the ideals in society and what we
- 1:10:44were guard is the right behavior and stuff, you know, we will
- 1:10:48hold each other to a high standard and may perhaps you
- 1:10:51could argue it. it's reflective of that mean, if it's if this
- 1:10:55was what was 50 years ago, 30 years ago, 100 years ago, you
- 1:10:58know you, maybe, maybe our Behavior towards each other
- 1:11:04wasn't quite where it needed to be either.
- 1:11:07I mean that's and that's true again, and again.
- 1:11:08And again, you know, I feel like, um, everything a basic I
- 1:11:12guess, what my plan is is everything is connected to some
- 1:11:14extent and I think treatment of others and animals is very
- 1:11:18reflective of Us and who we are. In many respects, just a couple
- 1:11:26of questions for you just about cats in general.
- 1:11:28One thing. I wanted to ask you about, which
- 1:11:31I think might be interesting is given that, you know, both dogs
- 1:11:37and cats originally obviously come from the wild and they were
- 1:11:39domesticated by humans and have become very kind of, you know,
- 1:11:43closely associated with, with humans, almost intertwined.
- 1:11:47Why do you think there is this kind of drastic?
- 1:11:51Difference in terms of temperament and attitude between
- 1:11:54dogs and cats. I mean obviously every cat and
- 1:11:58dog is different but what you said does ring, true that dogs
- 1:12:03do kind of need humans. Whereas cats they very like some
- 1:12:10of them do genuinely need us and they have a bit more needy and
- 1:12:15sometimes that's behavioral. Sometimes that's because of
- 1:12:17abuse or whatever. Sometimes it's just Are
- 1:12:20personality, but then, you know, it time and time again,
- 1:12:25especially when I lived in Europe or so all the time, you
- 1:12:26know, you could leave the cat to do its thing.
- 1:12:29Sometimes a cat wouldn't return for days, come back and just be
- 1:12:33all like, friendly and one hugs and stuff and then don't see it
- 1:12:37for another way, if it was very strange to me because here in
- 1:12:39England, like you see a bit of that but generally, it's like, I
- 1:12:43don't know, maybe they go out for a few hours and they come
- 1:12:45back, spend probably sleep throughout the day hunt at
- 1:12:49night, you know, that's kind of the deal.
- 1:12:51But yeah, I just want to get your thoughts on that like this,
- 1:12:53this major difference as far as temperament and personality
- 1:12:56between dogs and cats, and why it is that we have this
- 1:13:00perception? Sure.
- 1:13:03I think there are different facets to that one.
- 1:13:06They're different species and they have different strengths
- 1:13:10and weaknesses, right? And skill sets.
- 1:13:13Very like cats are much more difficult to train for commands,
- 1:13:17not impossible, but more difficult and dog.
- 1:13:20Dogs are much easier to train when it comes to giving them
- 1:13:25commands and having them do certain things and perform
- 1:13:28certain behaviors. Like there's a reason why we
- 1:13:31have guide dogs, but not guide cats because that cat will 100%,
- 1:13:35leave you for dead. And and I think to an extent,
- 1:13:40this is also because we have accepted the limitations of cats
- 1:13:45and we can do that because there's so much smaller, right?
- 1:13:48Because when you look at some there are Species that are
- 1:13:51bigger than I am, that way more than me that could tear me
- 1:13:55apart. If you know if they had like if
- 1:13:58they're coming at me and so their natural inclinations and
- 1:14:03their size lead us to want to control them more.
- 1:14:06Whereas cats, like, you can train a sheepdog right to herd
- 1:14:11sheep and it does a specific activity in a specific way with
- 1:14:14an animal that response. How do you train a cat to hunt
- 1:14:17mice in a specific way? Like, you don't even know
- 1:14:20necessarily whether Are those those mice are and so they have
- 1:14:23more Independence and we trust them to like do their particular
- 1:14:26tasks and things on their own and we've just kind of done
- 1:14:29that. Whereas with dogs.
- 1:14:31We can have more control. Therefore.
- 1:14:33We do have more control. We want more control because
- 1:14:36they can do more harm to us individually and you know and as
- 1:14:41a whole right you're usually walking down a dark alley you
- 1:14:44see a pack of dogs. How are you going to feel
- 1:14:48compared to seeing a bunch of cats together?
- 1:14:50Right. Like, oh, look at the cute
- 1:14:52kitties, right? And they're probably more likely
- 1:14:54to scatter. Whereas those dogs could be
- 1:14:57aggressive. You don't know and they might be
- 1:14:59just fine. But we're going to tend to
- 1:15:01ascribe more aggression towards dogs than towards cats because
- 1:15:05also size-wise, they can be bigger way much bigger than
- 1:15:09cats. Now, if you think about it, like
- 1:15:10if we had tigers that we were keeping as pets, you'd probably
- 1:15:15be training more and holding them on a tighter leash.
- 1:15:18Then we do the average house cat because we just Don't perceive
- 1:15:21them as a danger. I don't know to what extent we
- 1:15:24could do more in terms of bringing those species together
- 1:15:29in terms of how we interact with them and like shaping their
- 1:15:32environments shaping the way that they interact with us and
- 1:15:35that would be a very curious, like 100 year project, right?
- 1:15:39Or more to see if you could, if you could bring them closer
- 1:15:43together, in terms of the ways that they behave, and the way
- 1:15:46that they are trainable. But those are some of the larger
- 1:15:49things that I find are. Very different between the two
- 1:15:52species. And we're really more willing to
- 1:15:54let cats like do their own thing and to an extent will tolerate
- 1:15:59more Shenanigans from cats. Then we will from dogs.
- 1:16:02Like, if your dog is not housebroken, that's a real
- 1:16:04serious problem. But like, your cat peeing,
- 1:16:06outside the litter box, you're like, oh no, what have I done
- 1:16:08wrong? Not!
- 1:16:10What have you done wrong as a cat?
- 1:16:11But like I have clearly not set up the perfect environment for
- 1:16:15this animal. Otherwise, it wouldn't do this.
- 1:16:17Right? Whereas, a dog is a bad dog if
- 1:16:19he pooped on the floor or Or you know, peed in a corner.
- 1:16:23It's very true because I've always seen doctors being kind
- 1:16:27of like what it varies but generally they like a
- 1:16:31perpetually toddler like cut kind of wears cats, always kind
- 1:16:36of and and they give me wrong. I think there's certain breeds
- 1:16:41of dogs and certain personalities can like once you
- 1:16:44get to certain amount years. They they do become very mature
- 1:16:47and intelligent and they just, they don't even have to be told.
- 1:16:50Is cats just kind of seemed very mature from the get-go.
- 1:16:54Like and I've always found that fascinating how different their
- 1:16:57personality is two dogs. They just start.
- 1:16:59I mean as you said I think a lot of it does come down to just
- 1:17:03different being different species to having different
- 1:17:05temperaments, but maybe some of it is to do with the way we
- 1:17:09treat them as well and our perception of them.
- 1:17:13Well, I different rhythms do, right?
- 1:17:15Because like cats tend to be more like Dawn and dusk oriented
- 1:17:18hunters and spend a lot of Of their time sleeping during the
- 1:17:22day and overnight, whereas dogs tend to be more like, what's my
- 1:17:26human doing? Are they awake?
- 1:17:27Like let's go and yeah, and have those and have far more
- 1:17:32difference in their energy levels.
- 1:17:34Like, as adults as adult animals, like, you can have a
- 1:17:37very active dog, but most cats are not going to be nearly as
- 1:17:41active as as a dog. Absolutely.
- 1:17:45How can someone become an effective Cat Whisperer?
- 1:17:51What's the secret? Oh goodness.
- 1:17:55I think it's lowering your expectations of what a cat is
- 1:17:58going to do and knowing what cats, you know, kind of like who
- 1:18:03they are, right, accepting them as they are.
- 1:18:06And figuring out what works for any individual cat or doesn't, I
- 1:18:10know that as someone who has worked on training.
- 1:18:12My cats not to jump on things. Like one of them just didn't
- 1:18:17care. She needed to be shoes, straight
- 1:18:19up vertical. And back down and loved it and
- 1:18:24my bigger cat had a harder time jumping on stuff.
- 1:18:26So we never really had to worry too much about it, but kind of
- 1:18:30understanding what your cats interests are and what their
- 1:18:33triggers are and what scares them or what they don't like,
- 1:18:37because the most effective training tool we ever used, was
- 1:18:41a spray bottle, just filled with clean water and just a little
- 1:18:45Spritz in the face. Anytime that they tried to do
- 1:18:47something that was like unacceptable.
- 1:18:51And they did not care for that at all and they quickly learned.
- 1:18:54Like if I try to do X, Y will happen.
- 1:18:58I don't want that to happen. So I will stay down here and
- 1:19:01sometimes it was effective enough that you could just shake
- 1:19:04the water bottle and they would slink away from whatever
- 1:19:08Mischief they were trying to commit.
- 1:19:11But a part of it is also understanding their
- 1:19:13personalities and being willing to give them what they need,
- 1:19:16right. If they like to jump if they
- 1:19:18like to climb if they like to scratch.
- 1:19:20They need to have outlets for that, because punishing them for
- 1:19:23these natural behaviors is not going to be helpful.
- 1:19:26It's not going to really discourage those behaviors and
- 1:19:29it can cause both trauma and depression and anxiety in the
- 1:19:32cat. If they're not able to engage in
- 1:19:35these things that their bodies need.
- 1:19:36And, you know, it's the same way.
- 1:19:38Like, when people with small children, like if they don't get
- 1:19:40enough sleep, they are tiny monsters.
- 1:19:42And so you really have to, like, it's not about what you need
- 1:19:45your child to be able to do with staying up late, or getting up
- 1:19:48early. It's about the amount of time
- 1:19:50they Need to be resting and you have to adjust to that and it's
- 1:19:54the same with cats, you have to really adjust to the animal and
- 1:19:58understand them and figure out, like, what motivates them, and
- 1:20:02what doesn't and then use those tools.
- 1:20:05And then just baby proof, your home and not have candles or
- 1:20:08plants anywhere because both are a recipe for disaster.
- 1:20:12These are health conditions that you mentioned the quite common
- 1:20:16in, obviously, in humans. It would sound like a stupid
- 1:20:19question, but I I did I genuinely don't know.
- 1:20:21It's just fascinating to me. I've heard of cats having like
- 1:20:23being anxious anxious having anxiety, but I always just
- 1:20:26attributed that to like, okay, pour owners you.
- 1:20:29But I remember, once when I was growing up, I saw one of my
- 1:20:35mom's best friends Partners had a couple of cats and it was
- 1:20:39fascinating to me, because the two cats were completely
- 1:20:42different, one of them was petrified of humans and the
- 1:20:48other one was chill. And they explained and I was
- 1:20:52only a kid. It's almost like five or six but
- 1:20:54and I used to get bit like upset that that the current one other
- 1:20:57cats was petrified. And it was explained to me that
- 1:21:00the reason that the cat was petrified was that it had been
- 1:21:02treated really badly. So it would just run and hide
- 1:21:07like even when it came to food time, the chilkat would just
- 1:21:11come do its thing. Whatever.
- 1:21:13Like I'm your boss, you know, typical cat and the other cat
- 1:21:16would kind of wait until it got dark and no one's around then.
- 1:21:20Then kind of go get the food. There was one time we had to try
- 1:21:25and get it out of a garage. It's run away.
- 1:21:28It was scared of something and it took hours to get the car
- 1:21:34because we're so scared. And I remembered because he is
- 1:21:40earlier that the one and only cat I'd ever owned.
- 1:21:43It was explained to me. I was like two or three years
- 1:21:45old and we were given this cat because the neighbors didn't
- 1:21:49want it. We just moved.
- 1:21:50Into this place. It's just me and my mom.
- 1:21:53And It was explained that the cat didn't like children, which
- 1:22:00I was is going to be a problem and it wouldn't come anywhere
- 1:22:03near me obviously. And apparently that was because
- 1:22:06the kids in the local area had been mean to her or whatever.
- 1:22:09So it's just like her. I hate children.
- 1:22:13My mom just carefully explained that we will get the cat to like
- 1:22:18you, but it's going to take some time.
- 1:22:20You have to build up trust. So here's what we're going to do
- 1:22:22and we would just basically put food out for the cap, you know,
- 1:22:28and basically, I was like, you know, the boss.
- 1:22:31Essentially, I would give, I would give the food every time
- 1:22:34and at first, I noticed that the cat would kind of stalk in.
- 1:22:38And I guess initially associate that I was down at first that
- 1:22:43used to pester my mom, but I think after a while I realized
- 1:22:45no, he's the Give a go to him, don't like little humans, but he
- 1:22:50gives me food. So he must be all right, and
- 1:22:53then the magic happened, it took about a month or so, but I was
- 1:22:57just sitting in our living room and the cat sort of wanders up
- 1:23:01near me and sees what's going on and we become friends and then
- 1:23:06we become best buddies. Then it's like cat loves me.
- 1:23:11And I remember I've never told this story before.
- 1:23:13Yeah, the cat's name was Rocky. Yeah, I didn't name of that.
- 1:23:17But let's imagine a three-year-old in his room
- 1:23:22biking up in the mud. This is how I began my mornings.
- 1:23:26I wake up in the morning and I had to stare cakes.
- 1:23:28I was a young kid and the cat would run up the stairs and jump
- 1:23:33over. So what I would wake up and be
- 1:23:35like, okay and the cat would just run up the stairs.
- 1:23:38Jump over to stare, get jump on my bed and I would just stroked
- 1:23:41the cat until my mom woke up. And that was it.
- 1:23:44That is the cutest thing I've ever.
- 1:23:46I've heard that I adore that it sounds like that cat was really
- 1:23:52important to you. Oh my God, I love the customer.
- 1:23:54I love animals. I've always loved animals, I
- 1:23:57think. Without sounding like douchey
- 1:24:01like oh animals, love me, but you know what it is.
- 1:24:03I think it comes down to temperament as well.
- 1:24:06Like you have to understand. The way animals are and they,
- 1:24:11and what you said earlier in the conversation about the vibe, you
- 1:24:16give off the temperament, you give up like animals are very
- 1:24:18sensitive. They can pick up on that stuff,
- 1:24:20dogs and cats. Both know if they have fantastic
- 1:24:25memories, you know, I remember this is a bit of a sad story.
- 1:24:28I remember there was a family dog.
- 1:24:30We had who unfortunately been abused.
- 1:24:33I think the British version of the carnival We'd had the dog
- 1:24:40for, like 20 years, you know, so this is like, 15 years in or
- 1:24:44something and dog was brilliant. Obviously.
- 1:24:49It's a rescue very well-behaved. But as suit the minute that it's
- 1:24:55or someone like across the road, that even looked even a little
- 1:24:59bit scraggly. Like they could be from the, the
- 1:25:01circus carnival. It would lose its mind.
- 1:25:04I'll just go, just go really aggressive because obviously,
- 1:25:08that's how dogs react. To fear and to memories of
- 1:25:13trauma and stuff like that. They get scared.
- 1:25:15They attack. That's that's how they then
- 1:25:16people. That's the thing.
- 1:25:17People that don't understand that they might look at that
- 1:25:19goat. Some aggressive dog, and it's
- 1:25:20like, no, it's not like, I don't think they Whenever I see an
- 1:25:25aggressive dog, the first thing I think is that's about it.
- 1:25:27Oh, no, every time say we're happy and popular opinion, a
- 1:25:33child, that gets bitten was asking for it.
- 1:25:36An adult that gets bitten was asking for it.
- 1:25:38It's not. And it's not necessarily that
- 1:25:41they were intentionally trying to do something mean to an
- 1:25:45animal, but they didn't take the appropriate steps to find out
- 1:25:49what triggers that animal. Whether it's, that animal is and
- 1:25:52lead to other. People, whether it's okay to pet
- 1:25:55and this is one of the things I have a five-year-old.
- 1:25:58The thing we always teach them is always ask the owner.
- 1:26:01Is it okay to pet and always approach the Animal by offering
- 1:26:05your hand for them to smell before you go into touch them?
- 1:26:09Because like think about it and it is also as as the parent of a
- 1:26:12small child, I get hands coming at my face all the time.
- 1:26:16It is unpleasant. Right?
- 1:26:18And so now like from an animal's perspective like from an adult
- 1:26:22perspective I can kind of I can process that but from an
- 1:26:26animal's perspective where like here's my dog.
- 1:26:29Here's my child. They are very in your face and
- 1:26:32those children are so close. I think this is what scares
- 1:26:35cats. A lot about small children,
- 1:26:37they're unpredictable, they move fast and they're very, very
- 1:26:41close to low to the ground. And so it makes them feel like
- 1:26:44more of a danger compared to adults, who tend to move slower
- 1:26:48if they get off the sofa at all, you know, who tend to understand
- 1:26:53and Give animals their space but the children, they're like, I
- 1:26:55want this. And therefore, I'm going to go
- 1:26:57do it versus the adult who's like, well this cat what this
- 1:27:02cat needs and how it behaves in react is also important to
- 1:27:05consider. So I'm not going to go after
- 1:27:07this cat but kids their whole world is about them, right?
- 1:27:10They don't they haven't like started really looking at like
- 1:27:14it's not just about me, it's about the people in my family.
- 1:27:16It's about my community. It's not just about me and what
- 1:27:20I want or need in this moment. It's A greater Collective and
- 1:27:24they're just not capable of that thought yet.
- 1:27:26And so they tend to be very aggressive and go after the
- 1:27:29animals and have to be trained on how not to do that.
- 1:27:31So I can see how that's problematic.
- 1:27:34But yeah, but if you just approach a strange animal that
- 1:27:36you don't know anything about their history about their
- 1:27:38temperament, you know, anything like that, and you just come at
- 1:27:41them. I can't blame that animal for
- 1:27:44trying to defend and protect itself because we as humans need
- 1:27:48to have a different approach of saying, you know is your dog,
- 1:27:51okay, to Pat, you know, a And like, is there anything I need
- 1:27:55to know about your dog and then make that introduction slowly?
- 1:27:59I think then it rings true that you said, and also that I've
- 1:28:03heard before particularly with cars, is this idea that, you
- 1:28:06know, dogs and cats pets are an exercise in consent, and it's an
- 1:28:11important lesson that you can teach your children by having a
- 1:28:15pain. And that's the thing like when
- 1:28:17you hear of these extreme scenarios where like a kid gets
- 1:28:20attacked by an animal or whatever and you know, it's
- 1:28:25always the same thing, you know the dog gets.
- 1:28:28Put down or something like that and it's like I always look at
- 1:28:31that like, okay. I look at it like double-sided
- 1:28:35part of it. I see.
- 1:28:36Okay. You know what?
- 1:28:40I think, if, you know, you've got a dog that's got like,
- 1:28:42trauma, you know that they've, you know, tricky temperament
- 1:28:46something like that. Just keep them away from young
- 1:28:49children, you know, like above a certain age, you know, like that
- 1:28:53kind again, it comes down to the owner, always comes down to the
- 1:28:56owner, but when it comes to, as you say, like the other side,
- 1:29:00which is teaching your children, how to react to it.
- 1:29:03I mean, Especially with dog, like cats are a bit cats are a
- 1:29:07bit funny, you know, like as you said they're a bit more erratic.
- 1:29:10Like the most I do is scratch you but then there's run away.
- 1:29:12Like, you know, there's not really much you can say it other
- 1:29:16than explain to your kid. Like what could this is?
- 1:29:19Why the cat does this? You don't need to be afraid?
- 1:29:22Oh, yeah, happened. I'm sure all of us have had that
- 1:29:23thing where you stroking the cat touches barely in it just
- 1:29:26scratches the hell out you and then.
- 1:29:28Yeah. And then it got ya and you're
- 1:29:30like, what and it but they just don't like that, but you learn
- 1:29:33that? Experience.
- 1:29:35Hmm, whereas but here's the thing, every class is different.
- 1:29:40Sometimes you do that your stroke, their belief re just
- 1:29:42they love it. So but exercise in consent and
- 1:29:47you know, but what you said specifically about in your
- 1:29:51handout and offering it and, you know, I do that every single
- 1:29:55time with dogs and cats and it's like a trust exercise and
- 1:29:59sometimes like Had this a lot with cats where they're like,
- 1:30:04sometimes we dogs to where they'll stick your hand and then
- 1:30:07they're just kind of decide I'm gonna walk away.
- 1:30:11Okay, you know, yeah, they they came they heard your question
- 1:30:17and they gave you a clear. No, and if they decide to they
- 1:30:21can change their mind and come back and give you a yes or ask
- 1:30:25you if you are interested in playing this game.
- 1:30:27So yeah, absolutely. And I think like I think this is
- 1:30:30another way that we're Being in terms of compassion for animals
- 1:30:35and that consent and having Humane living conditions and all
- 1:30:38of these things. I think part of this is, you
- 1:30:41know, when we think about like these changes being made and
- 1:30:43really any sort of what I consider more high-level change
- 1:30:48in society, right? That's not just purely about
- 1:30:50survival is when we get to a point where as a world or as a
- 1:30:55society or a country, we can have the time to expend on
- 1:31:00things that go beyond just just surviving and taking care of
- 1:31:04ourselves. Then we can expand into, you
- 1:31:08know, what does it mean to be human?
- 1:31:09What does it mean to be Humane towards animals and
- 1:31:11compassionate towards them and each other?
- 1:31:13And what is the world that we want to live in as opposed to?
- 1:31:16This is the world I live in and I have to react constantly to
- 1:31:20keep myself safe. Once we feel safe, we can expand
- 1:31:24into these bigger questions of what it means to live and to
- 1:31:28live a good life in this world and how to treat others.
- 1:31:30Pets and animals Looted, and I think we've gotten there
- 1:31:34compared to 100 years ago, 200 years ago.
- 1:31:37We've solved a lot of problems in terms of disease, right?
- 1:31:41Of course, we've created plenty of new problems as well.
- 1:31:44But between having so much more access to communication and
- 1:31:48connection around the world. Like I communicate with people
- 1:31:52from all continents all countries because I'm part of
- 1:31:56these International groups on Facebook, right?
- 1:31:58And I have all of this access to resources and to see even if
- 1:32:02There's not a community or culture represented in my home
- 1:32:05that I can see what this is like and like learn more and make
- 1:32:09these connections and see these patterns around the world, but I
- 1:32:11can do that because I have both the time and the calm energy to
- 1:32:16engage in this because I don't have to work three jobs to
- 1:32:19support my family because no one in my family, luckily knock on
- 1:32:24wood, has any sort of severe illness, right?
- 1:32:27That we are, that's consuming our time and our energy.
- 1:32:29So, you know, it's easy to say, like, oh, because Passionate and
- 1:32:32do this and do that. But our individual experiences
- 1:32:36in life and what we're dealing with and going through inform so
- 1:32:40much of that and I can't begrudge someone who has a sick
- 1:32:44child or a sick partner or a sick parent for not thinking
- 1:32:48about recycling, right? When they have something so big
- 1:32:52happening to them. But overall, I think humanity is
- 1:32:56kind of entering a golden age of this, where we have the ability
- 1:33:00to quickly solve problems to quickly connect with each other
- 1:33:03and to think Beyond. Just, this is what I'm doing to
- 1:33:06survive to do more planning of like what does sustainability
- 1:33:10mean in terms of how we live our lives and how corporations are
- 1:33:13set up and how companies do things, right?
- 1:33:16It's not just about like what's the short-term benefit and gain
- 1:33:19here, but how can we make this last for a really long time in a
- 1:33:23way? That is balanced and that
- 1:33:26doesn't create more harm in the world.
- 1:33:28And whether that's in terms of pollution or just corporate
- 1:33:32practices the cultures within workplaces and having some of
- 1:33:37that awareness of first like social and emotional development
- 1:33:43is key and understanding how we feel helps us understand how
- 1:33:47others feel. I think it's really hard to be
- 1:33:49empathetic. If you can't also be in tune
- 1:33:51with your own emotions and whether those are are hard
- 1:33:54emotions, like anger, and envy, and frustration and sadness or
- 1:34:00more positive emotions of, you know, happiness and joy and
- 1:34:03love, and all of these things. But you have to and you have to
- 1:34:07take the good and the bad. And I think this is where we are
- 1:34:11right now where we can do more of those things more and more of
- 1:34:14us can but we also have to be careful then not to raise the
- 1:34:18standard. So high that we look down on
- 1:34:21people who are in a season of their life where they can Do
- 1:34:24those things? Thank you for sharing.
- 1:34:28Love to get a couple more questions in before.
- 1:34:31We finish. Just standard questions.
- 1:34:34I ask every guest. What's the best advice you've
- 1:34:37ever received? Oh my gosh.
- 1:34:40This was actually super recent for me and it felt revolutionary
- 1:34:44and the advice was don't tell yourself.
- 1:34:47No. Let the other person tell, you
- 1:34:49know, if they're going to. So don't not ask a question
- 1:34:53because you Expect, it's going to be a, no ask the question.
- 1:34:57And if they are going to say, no, they can do that.
- 1:34:59But don't stand in your own way by never asking for something
- 1:35:02that you need or want to begin with.
- 1:35:04And I feel like that gave me permission to really free myself
- 1:35:08up to just go after something and say, like, you know, I want
- 1:35:12this thing, or I'm curious about X, and the other person can
- 1:35:16absolutely say no. And I can be okay with that.
- 1:35:19But I also sleep easier tonight knowing I didn't miss the
- 1:35:22opportunity, right? I did.
- 1:35:23Stand in my own way. So, don't tell yourself.
- 1:35:27No. Let the other person tell, you
- 1:35:28know, if they're going to put it in a vice.
- 1:35:32What's the biggest life lesson you've learned so far?
- 1:35:37Oh my goodness. I think the biggest life lesson
- 1:35:42is that for all the times that I feel like, you know, I need to
- 1:35:49give Grace to other people. I need to remember, just how
- 1:35:52much grace I receive in my own life.
- 1:35:55And that, it's not this like, Snobby thing that I'm doing
- 1:36:00because I am better than you to give you Grace when you make a
- 1:36:03mistake or something happens that you know, that harms me,
- 1:36:06but that it's really about reflecting on the fact that so
- 1:36:10many other people have done this for me that I'm not even
- 1:36:13necessarily aware of, you know, in those moments that that I
- 1:36:18have been giving Grace and that I should really put more of that
- 1:36:21out into the world myself and let things go and have more calm
- 1:36:27conversation. Ends, and give people the grace
- 1:36:30and the flexibility and understanding that I want.
- 1:36:32Because I know my intentions are good, and I think most people
- 1:36:35have good intentions and coming at them in aggressive ways,
- 1:36:40isn't helpful. So really putting out more grace
- 1:36:42in the world. Because knowing that there is
- 1:36:45lots of times that people show me Grace as well.
- 1:36:49Thank you so much. And as we draw things to a close
- 1:36:53for today, do you have any upcoming projects or some final
- 1:36:56thoughts that you'd like to share with our lessons?
- 1:36:58So I am a super, super excited about a project that I'm working
- 1:37:02on right now because again supporting animal Charities and
- 1:37:05nonprofits is very close to my heart and knowing that this is
- 1:37:09such a big need, not just here but all around the world.
- 1:37:12We are launching a fundraising initiative where animal
- 1:37:16organizations that feel. To our brand can take advantage
- 1:37:22of bulk, pricing to use condoms as a fundraising tool so that
- 1:37:26they can have like a really clear-cut shelf, stable product
- 1:37:29that takes a tiny tiny footprint that can be buzzworthy in terms
- 1:37:33of the name or like white labeled for their needs with
- 1:37:37their or co-branded, with their organizations information to
- 1:37:41help both raise funds for them. Raise awareness of declawing
- 1:37:46practices and sustainable alternatives to Clawing and also
- 1:37:50support their mission of having animals and pets taken care of,
- 1:37:55and with dignity respect and sustainability in mind.
- 1:37:58So that is one of the biggest things that I'm working on right
- 1:38:01now, and I'm really excited for that.
- 1:38:03Excellent. Well, best of luck with that and
- 1:38:05everything that you're you're doing in your life.
- 1:38:07It's been a real pleasure talking to you and getting to
- 1:38:10know you and sharing your story. And yeah, just a massive.
- 1:38:13Thank you for everything. Thank you.
- 1:38:15It's been an honor and a treat to get to know more about you as
- 1:38:18well. And I'm really grateful for you
- 1:38:22for sharing this time with me. Okay, Pleasures.
- 1:38:24Mine is always and all the listeners of Christian re
- 1:38:27podcast as always be safe. Be well, and I'll see you in the
- 1:38:32next one.