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The Most Successful Women Are Delulu · The Embodiment Lab

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Every single successful and fit woman has a certain level of delusion.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: You do need to be a little delulu if you want to be successful because playing it safe will not get you there.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to the embodiment lab.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: My name is Addy, and today we are talking about delusion.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: But first, I just want to say that this episode is brought to you by so many things.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we got to do a little life update.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, I am being held down on my office chair by a cat, a sleeping cat, who I refuse to move, even though I definitely should have gotten up to eat like an hour and a half ago.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: I literally am stuck here.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm stuck.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna have to play a little catch-up on my meals later on in the day.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: But that's okay.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: The sacrifices we make for cuteness, right?
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: So everybody needs to know that I am currently sitting here with a cat stuck on my lap, and she's a sweet little princess girl.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Uh second thing, I am feeling ever so slightly sick.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: I have a sore throat, so that's super fun.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: My energy is like not the best, but hey, we're gonna sit here underneath a cozy blanket with a cat on my lap, and we're gonna just yap about being delusional because hey, story of my life.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, third thing.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_00: Last week there was not a podcast episode because um, see, my entire life changed.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: I had the best weekend of my life ever last weekend.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_01: I got engaged, which was so freaking exciting.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I've just been in La La Land for the last like six days, ever since it happened.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's Friday as I'm recording this, and I just got engaged this past Saturday on the 23rd of May, which was just amazing.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: I had my mom drive in from Texas, and my brother and his fiance drive down from Tampa, and then my now fiance.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my goodness, my fiance's sister and brother-in-law flew in from DC.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: And so it was just this super cute, intimate thing.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and it was just so sweet, so amazing.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: And oh, also my best friend, oh my gosh, my best friend flew in from Texas to take pictures of the whole thing, so yeah.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: Also, I know every single person has been asking me this, but I did have a feeling that it was gonna happen.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't a surprise, but also like I couldn't tell Zachary that it was gonna happen.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I just kept the facts that I knew to myself, but there were just like little little things that I picked up on just in the last month or so.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh my gosh, we're just gonna go on a side tangent before I get into the actual episode.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: But leading up, I would say probably like a week or so before this, Zach texted me on a random Thursday and was like, hey, don't let me forget to tell you about some work events that I want you to come to.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, okay, do I need to like block off any days?
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: Because just in case I have like calls booked or whatever, I don't want to have to reschedule.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: And he was like, Nope, you're good.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, okay, that's interesting.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: And then, see, I forgot to remind him to tell me about that.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: So the next day, Friday, we're at the gym and he's telling me, okay, next, actually, he didn't even say next week.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: He said Memorial Day weekend, we had this business dinner with a business partner that his company is working with on a project.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_00: And we were gonna go to dinner with this business partner and his parents on Saturday evening before Memorial Day.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh, fun, cool, okay.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: Granted, I've never, we've never done this.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: We don't do business dinners, we don't like he hasn't gone to one yet.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't gone to one with him.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like, this has not happened before ever.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so I was kind of already like, that's a little strange.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: And then I pull up my calendar on my phone because I'm like, okay, surely Memorial Day weekend is like end of the month.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: We have a few weeks, you know, chill, whatever.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: I look at the calendar, and Memorial Day is literally next weekend because you know, June 1st is on a Monday this year.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: So Memorial Day is a week early because we don't have Memorial Day in June.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: That's just not how that works.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm like, are you sure like you mean Memorial Day weekend?
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's that's next weekend.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: He's like, no.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And he looks and he's like, ooh, crap.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_01: And he starts panicking, and it's kind of funny to see, but I'm like, okay, in my head, going, all right, something, something fishy's happening because he's panicking.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, I gotta text people, I gotta figure this out.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, that's crazy that it's next weekend.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, I was just keeping it to myself of like, okay, yeah, you do your thing.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: You text whoever you need to.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just gonna be over here warming up.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I like kind of knew.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: Later that workout.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: So this is a Friday, we were at the gym training upper body, and I always grab all of our stuff moving from machine to machine or whatever.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: And we were moving from the dumbbells to the cables, and so I grabbed my phone, his phone, my Alani, and his shaker bottle with his intra, and his phone lit up.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, naturally you glance, and it was my mother confirming plans.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: All I saw was, hey, just wanted to confirm plans, something about like coming down Friday, Saturday, and then my brother's name was in the text as well.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh my gosh, something's happening.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: But I didn't know if it was next weekend or like the following weekend.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't know when it was happening, I just knew something was happening.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: And so just like these little things just came together.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_00: And then, of course, the following Wednesday, my mother's location turned off, and I went, this business dinner is a little suspicious.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: She's coming into town, her location turned off.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: Like, this is real suspicious.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: My best friend Hailey, she was here visiting a couple months ago and she told me, because she's very involved in the proposal.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: She told me that when she landed back in Texas the last time that she came and visited me, she was gonna turn the location, she's gonna turn her location off so that I wouldn't get suspicious.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: My mother should have done the same thing months ago, but or at least a month ago, but that didn't happen.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: So just like little things like that.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: I figured it out.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_00: I knew it was happening, so but of course I couldn't tell Zach that I couldn't like take his moment away from him.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: So I just was I just kept quiet, silently freaking out because I was like, I don't know who to talk to about this.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_01: And then it happened, and it was the best moment of my entire life.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: And now I'm a fiance and I'm getting married, which is so wild to think about.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: And now I have a wedding to plan and I don't know how to do that, but we're gonna figure it out.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: But, anyways, that is my life update.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um, now let's actually like get into the mean potatoes of the episode.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I've never said that expression ever before in my whole life, but diving in, the thing that I see a lot of women struggle with is fear around committing, fear around what if this hasn't worked for me, fear around is this the perfect plan?
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, all of these and ifs, ors, buts, you know, all of these things that go around specifically coaching, but on a broader spectrum, your fitness journey, you know, like what kind of workouts do I need to be doing to see specific results?
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: What kind of food do I need, need to eat?
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: How many calories, my macros, the cardio, this, that, so many things.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of women spend a lot of time pondering like, what is the perfect plan for me?
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: And to be completely honest, embody you is the perfect plan for you because it's perfectly customized to your body, your goals, your lifestyle, all the things.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: But I will say that there is a very clear and drastic difference between the women who come into my program who get results and the women who don't get results.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: There's a very clear difference, and that difference is very simple.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: The women who get results are so fucking delusional, they're overachievers, and they take massive initiative and accountability for their actions and their journey.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: Now, these women come in and they're doing the absolute most.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: They are never missing a workout, they are logging their food, they get in, they watch the onboarding video, they get stuff set up before I have to tell them.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_00: So when we get on that onboarding call, we hit the ground absolutely running full speed ahead and they dive in.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: They don't stop to question, they don't wait for me to tell them to do things.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: They know what they need to do because the steps are very clear and laid out for them and they follow the plan.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: They don't give in to excuses, they follow it.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: Versus the women who don't get results or who have much slower progress.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: I have to remind them many times to complete check-ins or to do their workouts or to log their food, or they uh take their sweet time watching the onboarding video.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: You know, all of these things where it just takes a lot longer.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, you're not gonna get as fast results, obviously, because it's taking longer for you to implement, but then it's not going to be as drastic of a change for your body right up front, because your body's just in slow motion because you're not actually giving it a clear stimulus to change or a clear reason to change.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not to say that the women that join my program and who take initiative and accountability.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's not to say that those women don't experience doubt because there are absolutely doubts when it comes to investing in yourself and joining a coaching program and like, is this gonna work for me?
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: I've tried so many other things, like what makes this different?
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there's for sure doubts.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: But these women move and they take action despite having the doubt.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: I've always been an overachiever throughout my entire life.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: If you're new around here, I grew up a dancer, and as a dancer, you are told that you need to get into every single class, you need to try really freaking hard, you need to like, you know, there's so much that you need to do, so many like opportunities that if you say no to, they look down on you.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, okay, obviously you don't want this bad enough.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so they kind of just brush you to the side, right?
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: And that's just kind of the industry standard as a dancer.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: And so growing up in that atmosphere taught me, hey, if you want something, you fucking go for it.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: You don't sit there and think about it or ponder or question, you know, whatever.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: You go, you move, you make decisions fast and you go, you dive headfirst in on everything that you do.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I've had the same attitude with my fitness journey.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: I've had it with my business, and it's translated into so many different areas of my life, even like my relationship, you know, when I first met Zach, we literally met about a month before he moved to Florida, states away.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I had to make a decision fast of like, hey, is this somebody that I can see myself liking and getting to know and spending the rest of my life with?
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yes or no.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I had to make the decision of am I okay with potentially moving in the future?
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: Like, make decisions, take risks, be fucking delusional.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_00: I was so delusional getting into a brand new relationship long distance right off the bat after knowing this man for like a month.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: Take risks.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: And now, look, I'm living in Florida, I'm living my absolute best fucking life.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm engaged to the love of my life, and things have just worked out.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: The problem is that if you say you want something, you sit there, you ponder it, and you're so afraid of the risk, and you're so afraid of failing when in reality the failing is redirection, it's opportunities for you to learn.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: You don't trust yourself enough to figure it out along the way.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: That trust and that delusion is what gets you through potential failures, fears, doubts, all of that.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: You have to trust yourself enough to figure it out along the way because you will.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: The only way that you will not figure it out is if you sit on the fence and you ponder it.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: You have to move, you have to jump, you have to take the leap and figure it out along the way and trust that you will because you will.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: There's no way that you dive into something unknown and you don't learn something from it.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: Good, bad, positive, negative, whatever, you will learn something from it, but you won't if you stay put.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: The more that you do this, you stack evidence and you build trust with yourself, and you become more and more resilient and stronger and more confident over time.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: And you begin to build this trust that you will figure it out, you will commit, and you are somebody who follows through.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_00: And that trait and belief in yourself is so fucking powerful.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: Something that I've heard over and over again for the last several months is there is a difference between wanting change and wanting to change.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like, yeah, it would be nice to be more fit, feel more confident in your body, to be healthier, feel stronger, go to the gym, you know, do whatever.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: It'd be nice, cool.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: But there's a difference between wanting it and actually taking action and doing something about it.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: Because you can sit here all day long and be like, yeah, I want to start going to the gym, I want to start eating healthier.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: That's cool, that's great.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just waiting for motivation, versus someone who makes a plan and is like, this is how I'm going to execute it.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to do this at this time.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm in a grocery shop.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to go to the gym.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm in a meal prep.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to make healthy choices with my food.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: There, there is a very massive difference between those two.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: I do not care if you say that you want something.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: What I care about is the action and the proof that you're doing something about it.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: A very common thing that women say to me when they join my program is, you know, they just feel like what they're doing is messy.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: They don't really know what they're doing.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's not clear.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: But they tell me if I am somebody who follows through.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: All I need is a plan.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: I need to know what to do, and I show up and I do it.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: Those are the kind of women that get results.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: Those are the women that thrive in my program.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: These are women who walk the walk, not just talk the talk, you know?
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta be an action taker, a go-getter.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta be the Lulu.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: So, what are you gonna do about it?
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: You wanna be strong?
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: You wanna be a fit?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: You wanna be lean?
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: What are you going to do about it?
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Don't overwhelm yourself.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_00: Just start taking small steps, one foot in front of the other.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of the times when women start their fitness journey, they start looking way too far in advance.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: They overwhelm themselves, they freak themselves out and they think, oh my gosh, it's too much work.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's gonna take so long.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: No, stop it.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: One foot in front of the other.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: What is something you can do within the next hour that's gonna get you closer to that goal?
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_00: What is something that you can do today, right?
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: What can you do at your next meal?
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Can you drink more water right now?
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: One foot in front of the other.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because eventually when you zoom out and you've taken a thousand steps, you'll be so much further along, but it takes one step and you build.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: That is it for today's episode.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_00: I am gonna go make some lunch because now I have a cat that has hopped off of my lap and I'm starving.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what I'm gonna do.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: I hope that you enjoyed today's episode.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_00: I hope it was helpful.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: I hope that it was a nice kick in the ass.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope that you start operating with a little bit more delusion.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, no, a lot more delusion.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: Because you deserve to be a little Dululo.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: You also deserve to be fit, hot, healthy, strong.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: Summer is literally here, and it is time to take action.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to move, it's time to do the damn thing.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_00: So hope you enjoyed this episode.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know if you did on Instagram, and I will chat with you in the next one.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_00: Bye.