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The Life You Want Is Expensive. Are You Willing to Pay the Price? · The Nadia Chapman Show

• 0:06
  Welcome back to the Nadia Chapman Show. I'm your host, Nadia Chapman.
• 0:10
  I am back after a few weeks off, not because I want to, because life is just
• 0:15
  so busy these days, that I don't always have the time.
• 0:19
  And you know, it's not always a good timing to sit down and record these lovely podcasts.
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  But rest assured, it's one of my favorite thing to do.
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  And I just love that I am sitting right now in front of the microphone with
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  so many good topics for you for this week.
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  And the first one is just something I heard last week that just hit me in the face.
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  And when I heard it, I immediately stopped and thought, oh, wow, that is true.
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  And that is the life you want is expensive.
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  And now before you click away, because you think this is about money,
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  I don't like to talk about money So stay with me Don't roll your eyes I'm not talking about finances,
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  I'm talking about that The life that you want Obviously may cost money Because life is expensive.
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  But that's not the expense that I'm talking about. The real cost is much deeper than that.
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  The life you want is expensive because it requires things that most people are not willing to pay.
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  And that is courage, discipline, patience, the cost of consistency,
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  the cost of uncomfortable conversations, the cost of disappointment,
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  uncertainty, the cost of letting people misunderstand you.
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  And the list goes on and on and on.
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  And if we're being honest here for a second, sometimes it costs versions of
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  yourself that you've outgrown.
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  And the problem is that most of us spend a lot of time, too much time focusing
• 1:53
  on the dream and very little time thinking about the price tag that we attach to it.
• 1:59
  So we want confidence, we want big things to happen, but confidence,
• 2:04
  for example, well, it costs action. It costs you to get uncomfortable.
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  Some of you want freedom, but freedom often costs comfort.
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  We want growth, but growth can cost familiarity.
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  You know, we want change. I was talking about somebody in a session last week,
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  you know, about creating change and deep transformation, but change costs certainty.
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  The question isn't whether that we want the dream. Of course you want the dream,
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  but the question is whether you're willing to pay the price because every meaningful
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  thing in life, every dream you have asks something from us.
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  I see it all the time in my coaching and conversations I have with people.
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  You know, a skater can tell me that they want to land a new jump. Well, that's amazing.
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  I love that you're, you know, motivated, but are you willing to fall a hundred
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  times while you're learning that new jump?
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  You know, if someone tells me that they want more confidence,
• 3:00
  for example, that's also wonderful, but are they willing to feel awkward while
• 3:06
  building that confidence?
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  If you want a different life, for instance, a healthier relationship,
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  maybe a stronger, bigger business or a new career, more happiness,
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  more fulfillment, all things that we all want as human.
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  Are you willing to make decisions that will feel highly uncomfortable?
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  And that's the hidden cost that nobody talks about.
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  We love the outcome. We love focusing on the main goal, but we resist the process.
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  And that's why I do the work I do.
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  You know, because unfortunately, the process is where the price gets paid.
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  I think one of the biggest misconceptions that people have is believing successful
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  people somewhat found a shortcut, but they don't.
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  Successful people that you see and you admire, they do not discover a secret
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  road with fewer obstacles.
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  They go through the same stuff.
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  But I'm going to tell you, the older I get, the more I realize that successful people,
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  people I admire, the people that I want to be more like, simply became who they
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  are because they were willing to pay the price that a lot of you and me sometimes do avoided.
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  And not because they were fearless. A lot of people feel fear,
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  not because they always know what they're doing.
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  A lot of people I know that took big risk in life just took a leap,
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  not because they knew what they were doing. You know, they did stuff even if
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  they were not fully ready.
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  But because they stop expecting growth to feel comfortable.
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  That's a big one in coaching. You know, the people that are successful stop
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  expecting growth to feel comfortable.
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  And somewhere along the way, we've created this really strange belief that if
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  something feels hard and painful and scary and uncertain or very uncomfortable,
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  well, maybe it's because it's not meant for us.
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  Oh, boy. But what if the opposite was true?
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  What if this comfort isn't a warning sign? What if it's part of the process?
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  What if it's often an invitation? See it as an invitation.
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  What if this comfort is simply the price of admission for your next chapter? Ha!
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  Aha moment right there. You know, think about your own life for a second.
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  What are you wanting more of? What do you want right now? What dream is keeping you awake at night?
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  What dreams keep popping up in your mind?
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  You know, what goal do you work towards?
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  And what version of you keeps knocking on the door?
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  Now ask yourself a different question, not like, oh, can I do it? Duh.
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  Not, Not, oh my God, is it going to work? Or, you know, what if I fail?
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  What if I look like an idiot?
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  Instead, ask yourself, what is this going to cost me? And am I willing to pay it? Aha.
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  Because maybe the cost is consistency. Maybe the cost you're going to pay is
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  waking up earlier or setting boundaries with people around you.
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  Maybe it's saying no more often, or maybe it's saying yes.
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  I don't know. Maybe it's risking looking like a fool and risking judgment from
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  people around you. Are you willing to pay that price?
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  Every single dream, all right, has a price tag. Every goal has a cost.
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  This is my message for you today. And there's one thing I learned with this
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  coaching business of mine is that the problem isn't usually that the dream is impossible.
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  The problem is that we're often trying to negotiate the price,
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  the price tag. You know, we want confidence. Athletes wants to feel more confident,
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  but they don't want to feel vulnerable.
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  You know, success without failure. You know, that's always the same story.
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  Or, oh, I want to grow, but I don't want to get this comfort.
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  I want to change, but I don't want uncertainty. So, you know,
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  we need to reevaluate all that.
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  I was thinking recently about all the things in my own life that have
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  mattered so much, moving across countries, you know, building businesses and
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  writing books and starting this podcast, raising children, creating a coaching
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  practice. There's so many things.
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  None of these things came without a cost. They were moments of doubt, I guarantee.
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  Moments of fear. Moments when I was like, oh, I'm going to look like an idiot.
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  I'm going to, why am I doing this? English is not even my first language,
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  guys. I make reals sometimes.
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  And I catch myself mispronounciating something, you know, but I still go for it.
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  You know, there's always going to be moments of fear and moments when I absolutely
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  have no idea what I'm doing and moments when it would be easier to quit.
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  All right. But every single thing that I'm grateful for today required me to pay a price yesterday.
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  And honestly, I think that's true for all of us.
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  The life you want isn't expensive because it's impossible. It's expensive because
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  it requires you to become someone new.
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  And becoming someone new always costs something.
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  So see it as something exciting, not something that should push you away. All right.
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  And the most beautiful part of all this is that the cost of growth may feel.
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  Uncomfortable, but the cost of staying at the same freaking place is even greater.
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  And that can be your writer downer for today. The cost of growth may be uncomfortable,
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  but the cost of staying at the same freaking place is even greater.
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  You know, the cost of waiting and wandering and the cost of never trying,
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  the cost of spending years wishing that you had started.
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  All right. Those prices are pretty expensive too.
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  So if there's something that you've been wanting, a dream, a goal,
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  a big change in your life, a conversation with someone, a decision,
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  life is made out of decisions.
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  Stop asking whether it's possible or not. Start asking whether you're willing
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  to pay the price because the life you want is expensive, but so is regret.
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  And if you're going to pay for something, I'm going to tell you,
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  you might as well be invested in the life that's calling you forward. All right.
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  Thank you so much for spending a few minutes with me today. And if this episode
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  resonated with you, I would love for you to share it, share it with someone who might need this.
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  And until next time, please remember that the goal is never to avoid discomfort.
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  The goal is to choose the discomfort that's leading you somewhere that is meaningful.
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  I'll see you in the next episode.