Latest / The Family Teams Podcast / Ep. 121 | The Difference Between a Household Assistant and a Nanny

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Ep. 121 | The Difference Between a Household Assistant and a Nanny · The Family Teams Podcast

• 0:00
  What's up, 5-Minute Fatherhood listeners? Have you guys seen that Family Team's Weekend Live is officially open? You can register. You can claim your spot. A two-day event, Cincinnati, Ohio, October 18th and 19th this year. We're going to pack 250 couples in a Memorial Hall historic theater downtown where we're going to lean in, roll up our sleeves, and we're going to be able to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a
• 0:20
  and have a workshop about building a multi-generational family team on mission. You're going to get practical tips. You're going to get practical tools. You're going to leave with a family blueprint and manual. And officially, you're also going to be not alone and realize there's other people who want to do the same thing as you. We want you guys there. It's selling out fast. So make sure to go to familyteams.com slash weekend to register and claim your spot. And there's also a special little discount code if you're part of our Facebook group, which you can find a link to that.
• 0:48
  in the info section on audio or the info section on the YouTube channel. So again, familyteams.com slash weekend. It's selling out fast. Claim your spot. We'd love to see you there. I think what's really interesting about it is when you do get a household helper instead of a nanny, it changes how you start to even view the kids.
• 1:11
  Hey guys, welcome to the 5-Minute Fatherhood Podcast. I'm your co-host, Jeff Beth Key, along with my friend and mentor, Jeremy Pryor. Join us Monday through Friday as we chat about quick tips, skills, and ways to help equip you on your journey as a father to build your multi-generational family team on mission. Stay tuned.
• 1:32
  What's up, guys? Jeff and Jeremy here. Another episode of 5-Minute Fatherhood. Fun topic for today, and that is the difference between hiring a household assistant instead of a nanny. This is something that we actually care about, something that we do. But Jeremy, before I kind of share my thoughts, what would you say on this or why is this a topic for today?
• 1:48
  Yeah, so oftentimes when people think about getting help in the home, one of the first positions that our culture tends to think about is the nanny, right? So you've got lots of littles, and you're like, ah, I'm overwhelmed. And so oftentimes you will think about that position. But what both the Bethkes have done and our families have done and lots of people that we know, we've transitioned from that being kind of the go-to sort of first place to get help to,
• 2:14
  and have moved to something that we like to call the household assistant. So this is somebody who instead—the big difference is a nanny's primary responsibility is to take the kids so that you can do something else. A household assistant's primary responsibility is to do household tasks so you can spend time with your kids. That's the difference. And a lot of times we don't think about it this way. Again, this is a cultural thing where we automatically think, okay, nanny, that's what you need when you're overwhelmed.
• 2:41
  at this stage. But what oftentimes you're overwhelmed with is all those sort of tasks, right? The shopping and the cleaning and the laundry, and it can be having another extra pair of hands to help you with the kids. But instead of thinking of this as a way to spend less time with your kids, is there a way that a household assistant who's much more sort of multifaceted is really helping you figure out how do we really thrive as a household holistically, right?
• 3:06
  What kind of tasks would we want to give to that person so that we could spend more time together as a family? And sometimes that even means integrating that household assistant into some of those family activities. So this is, I think, a lot more creative and more helpful way to think about
• 3:22
  getting some help in the home. If you find that you're getting super overwhelmed and in order for you to really thrive in this season, you need some help. So Jeff, you guys have worked on this a lot. What do we do? Yeah, we've done the exact same thing. And I think it's just so helpful because like you said, it's just a different, it's kind of like you're kind of...
• 3:37
  you need help either way. Right. And I think it's interesting that we default to helping with the kids when I think that just says, says something sometimes to us about what we feel about kids and the burden of kids and how we want to work more. There's some other implications there. And I think we all have to wrestle with, but one thing I'll say that it helped for us is once we shifted to saying like, Oh no, let's just get mainly help with the stuff that's burying us so that then, well, here's what I'm trying to say. I think what's really interesting about it is when you do get a household helper, instead of a nanny, it changes how you start to even view the kids, if that makes sense. Yeah.
• 4:07
  Because it's really easy for when everything's drowning for kids, you then to be more short, you to be more impatient, you to be more disgruntled and grumpy and all that stuff. And so I noticed immediately once we started kind of optimizing or getting help or money we would have spent on a babysitter or a nanny, putting that money towards laundry, groceries, food, groceries.
• 4:25
  you know, car maintenance, the stuff that's annoying that we all have to do once we have kids still. I started to feel a lot more free and less burden, which then gives you a different kind of a demeanor with your own kids. So I just, there's kind of like a little domino effect that I think is really, really important that people have to think about because it is really hard to kind of carry the whole household. And while it takes for a household to run, because once you start having multiple kids, it does start to feel like a mini organization. It has maintenance. It has things that has goals. It has a bunch of different spinning plates. Yeah.
• 4:55
  And so why not have someone take away some of those spinning plates, but instead of it being the kids? And so that's what I would encourage you guys with is what does that look like? Not everyone, you know, we're not always in a season where we can say like, oh yeah, let's afford that financially. Let's put some finances towards that. And some of you guys might not be as well, but there are seasons where we are and we can move shift, we can move things around, we can shift things around. But one thing I would say is if you're spending everything
• 5:19
  any type of money on your children for nannying or for babysitting or whatever, can you immediately look at that money and say, can we actually optimize this money in a different direction to actually optimize the home, which then frees us up to spend time with the kids. And that's just a fun conversation to have and something that's very different and unique for a lot of couples.
• 5:39
  Hey guys, we know it's really challenging to try to build your family team when all the tools you've grown up with or seen essentially are aimed at only helping develop family members as a collection of individuals. That's why we launched familyteams.com, where you can find all the tools we've developed with tons of resources at different price points, free courses, videos, writings, etc. that help you build up and transform you and your family into a multi-generational team on mission. Check out all the resources we have over at familyteams.com.