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The Most Effective Way to Brain Dump to Reduce Anxiety (before the week ahead) · Do You F*cking Mind?

• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Hello, my beautiful beans, and welcome to the podcast episode
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: of today. So in today's episode, firstly, my name is
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Alexis Fernandez. This is Do You Fucking Mind? This is
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: the podcast where I help you change your relationship with
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: yourself and your brain, and sometimes your relationship with other people.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: But that is not what today's episode is about. This
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: is about how to create the most effective brain dump
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: in a way that it will help reduce your anxiety,
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: improve your focus, improve your creativity, and kind of improve
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: your overall mood. So I'm actually recording this podcast on
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: the Friday and an episode didn't come out on Friday
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: and I thought, why don't I release this episode on Sunday?
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: Because when I first, for those of you that are,
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: and when I say new, for those of you that
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: have started listening to this podcast after the first maybe
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: year of the podcast, you wouldn't know this, but when
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: I first started the podcast, I would release an episode
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: on a Sunday and I fucking loved it. I loved
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: releasing on a Sunday. I thought it was the perfect
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: time given the context of my podcast where A lot
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: of people on the weekend like to do a bit
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: of a reset or they like to reflect or maybe
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: they have the Sunday scaries and they want to feel
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: really good about themselves before they go into their week.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: And I had a lot of great feedback about the
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: fact that my podcast would come out on a Sunday. Now, no,
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: I'm not yet. Maybe not. Maybe I will. But I'm
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: not saying that I'm permanently changing the release date to
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: a Sunday. But I thought I'm going to do it
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: as a once-off because I miss it. The reason I
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: changed it is because when I signed with my first
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: network back in the day, They said, you need to
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: be releasing on a Monday. It's just better. It's this,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: it's that. Weirdly, I never saw necessarily a spike. It
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: was just the normal growth trajectory that my podcast was
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: always on. But yeah, who knows? Anyway, we're doing this
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: on a Sunday and it's going to be like a
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: little week, like a weekend reset for you guys. So
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: what I'm going to do in this episode is I'm
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: going to be talking about why a brain dump is
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: so effective and Why brain dumping can actually reduce your anxiety.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: I'm going to be talking about the cognitive behavioral therapy
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: behind it, the psychology behind it, all of that. I
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: might be referencing a couple of studies here as well.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: If I've actually written the actual studies down in my notes,
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: I hope I have. But then I'm going to give
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: you a step-by-step guide on how to properly brain dump.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: I'm going to break it down into four steps and
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: they are going to make so much sense. Maybe even
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: five steps. I think it might be five. And they're
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: going to make so much sense. And you're going to
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: be able to action this today. If you are listening
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: to this in the morning, especially, you'll definitely be able
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: to action this today. And you are going to feel
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: like an actual weight has been lifted off your chest. Okay.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: So before I get into it, of course, as normal,
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: a life update, I have an office now again. Again,
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: for those of you along for the ride, I was
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: recording my podcast out of my home for the last year,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: ever since I had the twins. So I was recording
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: the podcast from home, which was great. And I'm very
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: glad I did that. I have no regrets giving up
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: my old office. I needed to. I needed to be
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: at home way more. But then it got to a
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: point where it was just kind of not really manageable.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: The kids were getting louder. They were awake for way
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: longer stretches in the day. So then every time I
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: was recording at home, you could hear the babies and
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: this and that. I also know that I am like
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: way more focused when I work outside of the home.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: I get more done. I feel way more productive. I
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: feel more on when I'm working on that task. And
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: therefore I show up as a better version of myself
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: when I come back home because I can really close
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: that chapter of the day. Like my work day is
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: closed when I leave the office or the cafe or
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: wherever I am at. And when I return home, I
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: can just rock up as my at home version of Alexis.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: And I just feel like I'm just better partner, better parent,
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: better everything. And I'm just more present. So it worked
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: for the last year, but now I'm very excited that
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: I've got my own office space. It's in the city
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: and it's just giving sex in the city vibes. And
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: I just feel like I'm going to spend way more
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: money being here, but that's okay. It's okay. Okay. Now
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: let's talk about a brain dump and why it's going
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: to be so effective. So the point of a brain
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: dump and why it's so different to venting, which also
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: is very good for you in many other ways and reasons,
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: but I'm not going to go into venting, but the
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: difference between a brain dump and just kind of getting
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: things off your chest has to do with the strategy
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: behind it. When we vent, we normally are talking about
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: something emotional that is on our mind, something normally it's
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: one or two things that are really like weighing heavily
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: on our mind. And it's something that we kind of
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: are trying to flesh out. We hash over things that
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: have happened and our feelings, and that's good. But a
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: brain dump is basically trying to release that cognitive load
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: that you have on your mind. And a proper brain
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: dump is there, it is timed. There is a time limit.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: So instead of kind of Spending too much time on
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: one thing that you're writing down, you are just writing
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: everything down, just the surface level stuff. It's kind of
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: like a list in a way. And that is what
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: we are doing today. We are learning how to get
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: all this shit that's in your head out on paper
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: and we're able to look at it. We're going to
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: be breaking down different categories. importance and urgency, emotional versus non-emotional.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: And I'm going to give you a strategy on how
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: to basically tackle the madness that is behind everything you've
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: dumped onto this piece of paper. Okay. Now, before I
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: go into the few steps, I just wanted to talk
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: about a couple of things. One of the things that
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: gets in the way of us feeling really good about
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: what we're going to do for the day, or, you know,
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: you might, for example, you might be thinking, oh, tomorrow
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: is the day. Today wasn't a good day, but tomorrow
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: is a fresh day. It's a fresh start. And that's
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: where I'm going to get everything done. But you start
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: the day the same way as normal and you feel
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: pretty overwhelmed. You've got a lot on your mind. You've
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: got all this cognitive load. You feel like your memory
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: is kind of shot to pieces. You feel very stressed
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: and anxious. And all these good intentions that you had
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: at the start of the day are fucking, they've gone
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: out the window and now you're kind of staring down
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: the barrel of another night being like, I just did
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: not do what I wanted to do. Tomorrow's a new day.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: And you kind of are repeating that cycle. Now, one
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: of the things that affects us the most in our
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: cognitive load and affects our ability to get things done is, annoyingly,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: stress and anxiety. But then because we're not getting those
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: things done, it then causes more stress and anxiety. And
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: the other problem is that, let's talk about you know,
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: chronic stress in general. You're stressed about something. You're not
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: getting things done. You're not as productive as you want
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: to be. You have all these, you know, balls in
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: the air. But because we're stressed, it actually affects your
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: brain and how you then focus on a task. Your
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: focus goes down. Your critical thinking skills goes down. The
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: ability to make a decision, even a basic one, goes down.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Have you ever noticed that the more stressed you are
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: and someone just says, what do you want for dinner?
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: You're like, if you fucking make me decide what I
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: want for dinner, I'm going to end up in a
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: fucking asylum. And it sounds like a very basic question,
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: but it's yet another decision and you just can't do it.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it's just such a basic choice, but you're already
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: like consumed that your ability to make a decision is gone, okay?
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Another thing that goes down, of course, is your creativity,
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: but you can't get tasks done either. So your working
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: memory is shot to pieces. Like I said, critical thinking,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: decision-making skills, your short-term memory is one of the major
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: things that's impacted when you're stressed and anxious. And so
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: then you want to think about it as like a
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: negative feedback loop. Something bad happens, and then it triggers
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: another bad event, which then triggers more of the same thing,
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: which then triggers more of the same thing. So this
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: anxiety and the stress is causing you to perform really poorly,
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: and then that poor performance is making you more stressed.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: And then you go round and round and round, okay? Now,
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: an effective brain dump isn't going to cure your anxiety
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: because there's many different things that cause anxiety, but it
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: will address certain forms of your anxiety. And for some people,
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: is going to do wonders for your anxiety, depending on
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: the kind of anxiety you have. So I'm not saying
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: you're going to listen to this episode and it's going
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: to cure absolutely everything, but you want to look at
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: mental health as you need like a toolbox of multiple
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: different things that you want to be putting into place.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: And there's certain things that are going to work for
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: you on certain times or depending on what's the cause
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: of that thing. But ideally, as you put more and
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: more of these things together without obviously overwhelming yourself, but
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: using these tools when they're meant to be used, you
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: will see a really, really nice result and you'll start
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: to really notice a change in yourself. So this episode
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: is not to cure it, but it will make a shift.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: And for some people, that shift is going to be
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: very significant. So for me, I'm someone that doesn't struggle
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: with chronic anxiety, but I get anxiety. It's just not chronic.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: I get stressed about things and I get overwhelmed. When
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: there's so many balls in the air, when there's so
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: much to do, I can get kind of like a
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: paralysis fire analysis, you know, where you feel really stuck.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: And in those times, there is nothing that fixes it
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: faster for me than a proper brain dump. And I've
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: been kind of doing my research and reading about other,
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: you know, strategies and techniques you can use. And this
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: is the best kind of brain dump strategy that I
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: think will work, not just for me, but for most
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: of you listening. Now, another thing that you want to
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: think about and why brain dump is so important is
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: because your working memory is kind of what you're focusing
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: on right now and in the very kind of most
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: recent past, so like 30 seconds ago. So if you're
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: someone that's like, I can't forget to call that doctor,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I can't forget to do this, I can't forget to
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: do that, you then might have forgotten that thing, but
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: you don't forget that you told yourself that you can't forget,
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: if that makes sense. So you're like, oh, I knew
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: I had to do something. What was it? And because
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: you're constantly going round and round, I knew I, what
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: was that thing? What was that thing? And then you
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: stop and you're like, oh, it was fucking doctors. Okay. Okay.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: Now I've got to call the doctors and I've got
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: to do this. Oh, and then, oh, fuck what? And
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: so your working memory is being unnecessarily strained for no reason.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: Working memory in an ideal world should be used to
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: tackle something that's happening right in front of you. If
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: you're having a really heated debate with someone, you want
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: your working memory like on, like on. You know those
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: people that get so distracted when you're having a conversation
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: and they start going off on tangents and they cannot
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: stick to the fucking argument. It's because they're not using
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: their working memory properly. The working memory keeps things relevant.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: It keeps you on task. And that's why it makes
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: you a better problem solver and critical thinker because you're
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: using all the information that you've just received to do
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: something about it. Okay. So when you've got things taking
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: up that working memory, you're only leaving so much space
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: for you to do the other things. Your working memory
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: can only hold so much. So this is another reason
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: why I really suggest you do a brain dump and
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: you do it often because you want to offload things
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: out of your working memory onto paper where it doesn't
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: need to be in your working memory and you're using
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: your working memory for things that are actually going to
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: advance you further with your mood or with your critical
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: thinking skills or problem solving or your creativity and all
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: of the above. Okay, now. One thing that I did
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: want to share with you was an interesting kind of
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: study that was done in 2011. I'm going to put
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: this down in the show notes. But these researchers found
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: that these unfulfilled goals that people have, I've got to
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: set out and do this thing or I've got to
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: finish that or I've got to get that done. created
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: more intrusive thoughts and it interfered with people on unrelated tasks,
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: unrelated goals. So even if it had nothing to do
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: with that thing, it was interfering and these intrusive thoughts
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: were cropping up when they felt like there wasn't a
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: closed loop, that they hadn't completed that thing. But the
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: most interesting thing was the participants of this study didn't
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: even need to go and finish that task in order
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: to start feeling better about it. They just had to
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: make a plan for how they were going to tackle
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: that task So in order to reduce that cognitive interference
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: that they were getting throughout their day. So this is
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: another reason why a brain dump is so effective. It's
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: because it's not about having to fix all the problems
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: in your life. It's about getting it down on paper,
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: feeling like it's organized and feeling like you have some
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: sort of a plan. When you have some sort of
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: a plan or a plan for a strategy, You feel
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: back in control. It reduces that cognitive noise. It reduces
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: that interference of those, what was I going to say,
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: of those intrusive thoughts, and you feel a lot better
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: and a lot calmer. Okay, so this is what we're
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: going to do. Number one, and this one's going to
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: sound unrelated, but I'm telling you, you have to do it.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: Number one is prime your mind before the brain dump.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: is done. Before you sit down for this brain dump,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: you need to prime your mind. And the best way
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: to do this is through something physical, ideally physical activity,
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: but for some people, it could be something different. Now,
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: I would recommend you do a form of exercise. Either
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: some people find that doing really intensive exercise works for them.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: Other people find that cardio like a long swim or
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: a run. For me, the times that I get the
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: most ideas in my mind are either doing a weights workout,
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: like resistance training, or When I am going on a
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: fast walk with a playlist that I love, I get
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: so many good ideas that I find myself stopping and
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: having to pull out my phone, my notes, and jotting
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: down notes, jotting down notes, jotting down notes. This is
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: like ideas, ideas, ideas. So you want to get your
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: brain in a state where it is like, You know,
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: it's flowing, it's flowing, it's flowing with ideas or it's
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: remembering things better. Oh, and that thing, and I needed
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: to do that. And I had to get your juices flowing.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: So if for you, the workout isn't the thing, I
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: do highly recommend physical activity. But if that's not your vibe,
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: for some people, it's a shower. It's something that's not
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: pulling your focus where you're being distracted. So it's allowing
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: you to pay attention to your thoughts. Shower is really
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: good for some people. It's going for a drive. But
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: like I said, for the most part, it would be
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: either a walk run, swim, weights, whatever it is, but
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: I want you to prime your mind. And it doesn't
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: even have to go for an hour. It could maybe
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: be 15 minutes or something like that. Okay. So that's
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: number one, crucial, crucial, crucial, because it is literally priming
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: your brain to be able to have the most effective
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: brain dump possible. Next is the actual brain dump that
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: you're going to do. You have to set a timer.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: I need you to set a timer. And the reason
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: for this is knowing that the timer is there and
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: having it in front of you, it's going to be
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: this visual representation of the timer, allows you to stay
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: more on task. And instead of writing something down and
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: then dwelling and thinking, oh, that thing, and then trying
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: to fix that one thing. No, we're just putting everything down,
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: everything we can think of. And it's not just the
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: to-do list. The brain dump is all encompassing. So you
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: want to write down A bunch of things. One of
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: the things is, of course, things you have to do,
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: whether it's stuff you haven't even started or completely uncompleted tasks.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: It could be so simple as replying to those five
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: text messages I received to starting my tax return. Another
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: category of that is emotional kind of tabs that I
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: have open in my brain. Maybe you went on a
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: date last week and you had such a good time
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: and then that person has ghosted you and you just
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: can't get that out of your mind. It keeps coming
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: into your mind. It keeps coming into your mind. I
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: would include that in my brain dump because it's an
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: emotional thing that is interfering with your day, okay? It
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: could be my family member's quite sick and I'm worried.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: That's another thing. So there's an emotional category there for
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: things that maybe you don't have direct control over, but
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: it's really taxing on your emotions. You're writing that down
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: as well. Then another really good category that I would
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: put down as well is decisions that need to be made.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: So it might not necessarily have to be like an
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: action that I can do, but I need to make
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: a call on this thing. I need to decide which
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: job I'm going to accept or I need to decide
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: if I'm actually going to sign up for that fucking
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: gym that I went on a tour to last week
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: or I need like this. You know what I mean?
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: It's just, it's basically you're trying to put anything that's
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: kind of sitting in your awareness and it doesn't have
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: to be causing you crazy turmoil, but it's enough that
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: it's taking up mental space. It's kind of, it's adding
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: to that cognitive load and cock blocking that working memory.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: All right. So to summarize emotional things that are weighing
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: on your mind, actual to-do lists, whether you've started them
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: or they haven't even begun, whether they're about to be
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: completed or not, whether they're long, hard, short, easy, doesn't matter.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Whatever you can think of, put it down. And then,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: of course, the other one is things I need to
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: make a decision on. And then if you want and
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: if you have time or if maybe you're not that
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: stressed today, maybe you're not being burdened by all these
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: fucking anchors of life, So maybe you also want to
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: write down ideas that I'd love to action that might
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: not be looming in your mind, but it's something that
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: you're like, oh, but I keep saying I want to
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: start that blog or I want to whatever, put it
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: down as well. Now, how long are we going to
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: brain dump for? How long is a piece of string?
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: You don't want to be excessively long. I wouldn't do
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: an hour. Fuck no. But maybe 15 minutes. 15 minutes
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: is probably a good time. You might need 20. You
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: might need 10. But start with 15 minutes as the ballpark.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: you are going to notice that after step two, you
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: are already going to start to feel calmer. And the
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: reason for that is that when you take things out
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: of your mind and you see them on paper and
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: they're written down, even though you've done nothing to change it,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: nothing's been affected yet, you already start to see it
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: as more manageable because it's in front of you. You're like,
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: it's doable. I'm actually capable of doing a lot of
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: these things. When it's all in your head, not only
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: are you having to think about what you have to do,
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: but you're having to hold it in your mind, you're
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: having to remember, and it's interfering with your mood and
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: your ability to do things. So just that alone is
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: already going to be, if you only did those two things,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: the prime and the dump, you would already feel better, okay?
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: But of course, we're going to take it to the
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: next level, which is number three. We are going to sort. Now,
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: there's a few different ways that you can sort it out, but...
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: I want to, number one, I would like you to
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: sort these into things of what is actionable from what
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: is not actionable. A lot of things that carry heavy
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: emotion that just cause you stress might not be actionable.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: For example, maybe you every so often carry this regret
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: and there's something that you just, you can't remedy it.
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: Maybe you've already apologized or you've already tried to remedy
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: that regret in the past, but it still feels like
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: a regret. So that's something that maybe is not a
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: specific action you can take on it right now. It
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: could also be, like I mentioned earlier, you were ghosted.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: So you're feeling really shit about yourself. And apart from
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: trying to do things to move on, you can't force
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: that person to contact you or give you closure. You've
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: got to create that for yourself. So as far as
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: certain things that people have done to you, it's not
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: really something you can action per se other than process
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: and move on. So I'd like you to separate those
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: two into something that's actually actionable, that within the next
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: few days, if not today or the next week, I
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: could actually actually do something that would alleviate, or I
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: could complete it all together. So we're going to do that.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: We're going to bring them into two categories. Now, out
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: of the actionable ones, I came across this thing called
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: the Eisenhower matrix, which is very interesting. It's basically a quadrant.
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: And I think this was like a president of the US.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: I don't even know. I mean, I don't know much
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: about the history of US politics, but it was a
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: president from the US back in the day but he
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: created this matrix. It was apparently very known for being
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: extremely productive. Now, this matrix has four quadrants and it's
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: a scale of important versus not important and urgent versus non-urgent.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: So in the top left-hand quadrant, we've got important and urgent.
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: So you're going to draw up a little square and
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: in the top left-hand one, you go your plus urgent.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: Things are going to fall into that category. Then in
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: the top right-hand square, you're going to go important but non-urgent. Okay,
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: so for example, seeing my friends regularly is important for
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: my mental health. Exercising four times a week is important
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: for my mental health. but it's not urgent in the
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: sense of urgency, if that makes sense. Then on the lower,
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: on the bottom left quadrant is non-important, but urgent. Like
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: I've got to reply to this email ideally by the
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: end of the week, otherwise X, Y, Z. And then
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: in the lower right-hand quadrant is not important, not urgent. Okay.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: Now this is kind of how it's been structured. I've
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: looked at a whole bunch of things online. You can
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: Google Eisenhower matrix and all these different ones are going
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: to come up and they're very similar to each other.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: So important and urgent is the things that you do, okay?
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: So anything that you're like, I have to action because
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: obviously it's important and urgent now. So I want you
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: to add it out of the list that you've written down,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: out of the ones that you separated already into, I
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: can control or I can do something about versus I
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: can't do anything about. So the things that you could
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: potentially do something about, the ones that are urgent and important,
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: you do, okay? Then with important and non-urgent, this is
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: things that you decide on. So say it's like I
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: have to exercise. I might not have to do it
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: right now today, but I can book in or at
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: least lock in in my head the next three days
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: that I'm going to be exercising. All right, I've made
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: sure that, you know, the kids are, you know, looked
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: after this, that. So I've got Tuesday morning, I've got
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: Friday morning and I've got Sunday afternoon. Those are the
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: locked in days and I'm going to be able to
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: exercise then. Okay, so that's decide. You've made a decision
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: even though you don't have to action it right now,
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: but you're scheduling important things in. Very important. Same with
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: social things. Same with maybe things for your studies or
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: your career. These are of very, very high importance, but
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: they might not be crucially urgent today. When we're talking
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: about important plus urgent, paying your taxes so you don't
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: get a late fine, that is urgent and it is important.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: So that's something you're going to do ASAP. I'm sure
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: you can think of many examples that fall into that category.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: Then we've got non-important but urgent. So this is like
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: having to reply to certain things in a timely manner,
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: having to book something in or having to return something.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: This is where you either schedule it in as in like,
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: I'm going to block an hour and smash out a
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: bunch of these because they often don't require crazy amounts
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: of focus, or it's something that you might be able
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: to delegate. Sometimes you're not going to be able to,
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: and sometimes you will be able to. Maybe you can
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: sit down with your partner or your housemates or your
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: family or whoever it is and see where can I
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: share the load with this kind of stuff? If I can,
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: if I can't, can you pay someone to do it?
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: If you have the means to pay someone to do something,
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: et cetera, et cetera. And then we've got the non-urgent,
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: not important. Those are the things you're eliminating out of
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: your life altogether. So if it's a person that's causing
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: you so much stress and you're like, I don't even
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: enjoy hanging out with them and there's no actual need
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: for them in my life, that's something that maybe you
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: can phase them out. Maybe it's, you know, I spend
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: way too much time reading hate comments on whatever, and
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: it actually causes me stress. I need to eliminate that
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: out of my life. I spend too much time doing X, Y, Z.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: I need to get rid of it. Or maybe it
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: could be, maybe if you're like run your own business
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: and you see that there's a pillar of your business
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: that you used to love, but at the moment it
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: doesn't actually generate that much money. It's more of a
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: thorn in your side than anything else. And maybe it's
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: something you've just got to fold in order for the
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: other things to kind of really shine. Maybe that falls
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: into that category as well. So Obviously, these four quadrants
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: are very dependent on every individual's life, whether you run
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: a business or whether you don't, whether you have heaps
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: of shit going on with your day-to-day tasks at work
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: or not. You know, there's many, so I can't give
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: every example under the sun, but you could use that
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: quadrant and apply it to your own life. And you
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: could probably find other examples online for your specific scenario.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: So you could see how to use the quadrant when
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: talking about home life or family life or work life
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: or whatever. Okay. So we've got decide, do, decide, delegate,
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: and delete was the four categories that I absolutely loved. Now,
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: out of the things that we're doing and deciding, those
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: like two ones of like high importance, because we're really
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: going to be focusing on the things that matter, that
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: have importance. And the reason I say that is because
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: the things of importance are the things that are probably
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: going to weigh the most on your mind than those
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: things that are like not as important, but you kind
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: of have to get to them. It's kind of like
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: You know, when you receive all these messages, you don't
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: want to come across as rude, but it's also not
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: life and death if I don't reply, but I also
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: kind of need to reply, otherwise I'm a shit cunt.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: So that kind of thing versus if I don't book
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: in this doctor's appointment or if I don't book in
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: this tooth to get fixed before my trip, I'm fucked
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: and I'm going to be in pain the whole time.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: So now out of each one in those top two quadrants,
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: I want you to prioritize. Prioritize them one down to
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: however many, but if you're like, oh, I'm not sure,
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: just at least pick the top three, top number one, two,
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: and three, most important things and most urgent things. And
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: then same as the deciding, what are the three most
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: important things in this category? And if you're able to
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: prioritize all of them, fine, but I'm looking at the
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: top three most important things, okay? And then I want
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: you to put how time sensitive is this? So when
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: I do this kind of brain dump, I literally list, okay,
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: this is really important and it's time sensitive. This has
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: to be done by Friday, because then it allows me
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: to look at my week being like, in my head,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: I feel like I'm carrying so many things, but only
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: two things have to be done on Monday. Nothing has
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: to be done on Tuesday. Four things on Wednesday, and
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: then the rest don't have to be done by Friday.
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: So then I can like spread it out across the
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: week and I feel way more in control. It doesn't
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: feel like everything has to be done on Monday. Everything
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: has to be done. And then I have no time
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: to actually breathe or just focus on other things that
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: I want to be doing. Okay. So what's time sensitive?
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: And then you've got to ask yourself, what about this
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: would make me feel relief? There's certain tasks that you
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: have that don't have to be completed, but when you
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: do one thing towards it, you're already going to feel relief.
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: So you can also write that in. Now you've done
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: the quadrant. I want you to look at the emotional
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: things that we were talking about that maybe you don't
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: have direct control over. So I want you for the
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: emotional things to write them down, anything that's weighing in
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: your mind, whether it's guilt, whether it's abandonment, pain, whether
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: it's heartbreak, whatever it's that you're feeling. I want you
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: to write those things down and allow yourself to note
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: exactly what you're feeling. The whole name entertainment, I'm bringing
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: it back. So I'm feeling really guilty because I don't
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: think I ever, I don't think my apology was ever
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: like heard or understood. I don't think it was sincere.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: Or I'm feeling abandoned because I read all the signs
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: as something being good. I've messaged this person, they've ghosted me.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: Or I'm feeling humiliated because I put myself out on
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: the line and then someone said this to me, to
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: my face. Or I'm feeling like a failure because I
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: applied for all those jobs and not one person got
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: back to me and it's really stressing me out. Name
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: the emotion and say why. I feel X because this happened, okay?
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: And when we do that, we are able to really
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: shed light on our feelings and we're able to feel
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: the feelings. This is very different to ruminating. Ruminating is
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: to say, I feel like rejected or abandoned because this
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: person ghosted me. I actually think I've been ghosted in
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: the past before. What is it about me that makes
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: people want to ghost me? Am I a fucking idiot?
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: Am I fucking boring? Am I this? Am I that?
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: And then why are people, and then now no one
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: likes me and that's ruminating. Whereas naming it to tainment
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: and shedding light is I feel really bad and I
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: hate that this happened to me. And unfortunately it happens
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: to a lot of other people and I just feel
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: shit and it's okay to feel shit. And then you
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: might cry, which is also very good. A strategic cry,
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: very good. You feel the feelings and you actually feel
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: a sense of relief because suppressing requires so much more
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: energy than actually feeling the emotion. We're not spiraling. We
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: are allowing the emotion to pass. And when it does,
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: we have that sense of relief, at least even if
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: it's temporary, it is a sense of relief after you
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: felt that thing. So this is why the brain dump
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: is also really effective for emotional things, because you're allowed
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: to be like a candy. To feel this thing, I've
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: got to see it through. It's part of your way of, like,
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: it's part of how you heal. You are allowing yourself
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: to process, okay? And that uses way less energy. I
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: think sometimes we think if I cry, it's game over.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to like, I'm going to dissolve into
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: the floor. But you actually feel better after the cry,
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: even when you're like, no, no, no, no, I can't
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: let myself cry because I think I'm not going to.
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: It's never the case. During the cry, yeah, it's very intense.
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: But once you've cried it out, you actually release chemicals
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: in your tears, guys, chemicals in your tears that soothe you.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: and make you feel better. And this is only in
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: emotional tears. This doesn't happen with reflex tears. So it's
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: pretty fucking fascinating. So if you need to cry, cry. Okay.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: So yeah, definitely ask yourself, am I feeling it or
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: am I ruminating? And then of course, there's the other
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: category that I said, which is decisions that need to
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: be made. Just write all of those things down and
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: you don't even need to, for the brain dump, for
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: the sake of this brain dump, you don't even need
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: to have them, but maybe just have them written out.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: And then again, pick the ones that are time sensitive
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: and most important, like prioritize or at least pick the
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: top three. Okay. Then number four is plan. Like I said,
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: pick the top three of everything, whether it's decisions, whether
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: it's important and urgent, and then important, non-urgent. I want
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: you to pick the top three. If you've just got
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: way too many things, and if you've got too much
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: on your plate, pick the top one of each one.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: And I want you to start coming up with a
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: bit of a plan for that thing. And if you
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: can't figure out a plan, then I want you to
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: break it down into smaller, more manageable pieces. So for example,
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: let's say you've not done your tax for the You
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: are so beyond overwhelmed, the thought of it gives you
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: severe heart palpitations. So you think, oh, I've got to
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: do my tax. That's going to almost make it worse
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: for you. So the plan for that could be, I'm
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: going to pull together every possible piece of tax paper
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: or whatever that I've got filed or on my computer,
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: and I'm just going to bring it into one clump. Already,
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: you're going to feel better after you've done that, even
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: if you've not even started doing it. Then the next
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: step could be I need to call an accountant because
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to fucking do it because I haven't
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: done it in seven years. I need to call an accountant.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: And then the next step is X, Y, Z, okay?
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: So we're coming up with a plan. Even if we
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: haven't actioned it, in your head you're going to be like, oh,
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: I feel really good about this now. I feel like
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: it's doable. You went from feeling like I'm so overwhelmed
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: and turning a blind eye and sweeping it under the rug,
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: it's the elephant in the room that I refuse to
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: look at, to being like this is doable, I'm going
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: to make a change in my life and that change
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: is going to be made probably this week. which is
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: really taking the load off. If we can break things
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: down into these bite-sized pieces, you're able to identify the
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: parts that need to be done. And you feel like
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: you've closed that loop, you know, that open loop that
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: makes us kind of, it's called the, I don't want
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: to butcher the word, but it's an effect. And it's
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: when we keep a loop open in our head, It
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: kind of interferes with our cognitive performance. But even just
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: identifying what needs to be done next is one of
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: the best ways of feeling like that loop has kind
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: of been closed. We've been able to close off that
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: loop and move on to the next thing. So now
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: thanks to this brain dump, we've been able to figure
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: out what it is that we need to do, what
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: it is that we're feeling, and am I allowing myself
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: to feel it? Do I need to give myself a moment? Okay,
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: not ruminating, feel it. And what it is that I
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: have to decide on. We've got it all out on paper.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: And then if you want, if you're someone that's like
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: quite aesthetic with this kind of thing, this is your
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: opportunity to then rewrite it quite nicely. And it's almost
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: like it gives you that second wave of processing. And
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: while you're doing that, your subconscious mind is coming up
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: with little solutions along the way, solutions, solutions, solutions, because
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: you're now in a state of feeling calmer because you've
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: named everything. You're feeling proactive. You're feeling optimistic about everything.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: your future or the day ahead or the week ahead.
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: You're feeling more confident in your own abilities because you've
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: looked at it. And when you break it down and
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: compartmentalize it, you are confident in each individual thing. And
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: then you realize I can actually do this, which is
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: different to being overwhelmed, being like, I can't do this.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: I can do all these individual things. And if I
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: give myself a bit of structure, I can do it.
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Doesn't mean it's not overwhelming, but it's now doable. So
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: that confidence comes back. And then when you're feeling confident,
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: you're able to actually follow through with these tasks in
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: the days to come or in the weeks to come.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: So like I said, what we need to do, what
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: we're feeling and what we need to decide. So now
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: we're feeling a whole lot lighter. I do this all
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: the time and it's a fucking game changer. I absolutely
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: love it. But for those of you that are like,
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: you know what, Alexis, I still need an extra nudge.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: I need a little bit more. I've just got a
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: list of things that you can write down in your
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: brain dump to help you kind of process or to
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: help get things out of your head a bit faster
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: for that 15 minutes or the 20 minutes. So this
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: is what you're going to write down. What do I
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: need to do? What do I need to decide? What
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: am I worried I'll forget? What conversations or tasks have
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: I been avoiding? Procrastinating, procrastinating. What am I waiting on
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: from someone else? Because that can be extremely infuriating. And
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: sometimes you just need to write it down and say,
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: I need to follow up on this day. I'll set
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: an alarm to follow up here. Because there's certain things
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: that are not within your control. And it is, you're
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: waiting on someone to do something before you can do something.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: And it is what it is. But maybe you can
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: set things to follow up from those people. Then what
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: am I feeling? Anxious, sad, thrilled. betrayed? What am I
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: repeatedly thinking about that I can't control? These are more
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: those ruminating thoughts. And what can I delete entirely? What
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: can I just let go of completely? Maybe you've said
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: in your head, I've got to keep doing that thing.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: I've got to keep doing that thing. And it's just
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: weighing in on your mind. And then you realize, you
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: know what? I have to let that go. Maybe if
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: I let that thing go, a lot of my creative
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: energy will go into other things. Even if I wasn't
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: even actioning that thing, just the fact that it was
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: weighing in on my head was cock blocking me from
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: thinking about other things. So maybe it's time to let
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: some tasks just not be it. Maybe not for the year.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: Maybe you can revisit it later, but maybe you can't
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: do it all right now. Maybe you can do it all,
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: but spread out. Okay. So like I said, like this
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: brain dump isn't going to cure your anxiety altogether, but
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: If it's acute anxiety, it will do wonders for you.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: And even if it is chronic anxiety, it's going to
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: really help how you organize your thoughts and your emotions
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: and your mind. I'm telling you, it will make a
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: difference for sure. It, for me, is the number one
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: thing I do when I'm feeling anxious or stressed or overwhelmed.
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: There is nothing that's going to make me feel better
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: than sitting down, well, exercise, obviously, than sitting down with
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: a piece of paper and a pen. I sometimes do
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: it on my iPad. But I really love the physical
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: writing because then you can draw the quadrants and write
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: it all in and scribble that and scratch things out.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: I love it just thinking about it. I'm going to
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: go do it now after this. I'm not even feeling anxious,
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: but I just love a brain dump. And I love
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: to do this even when I'm not feeling anxious. Like
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: for me, honestly, it is one of the things that
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: I do probably weekly. And obviously because I do it weekly,
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: it's not such a long process, but it feels so
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: good and it is fucking therapy. And it gets me
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: excited for the week ahead and the weeks that I
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: haven't done it. If I take weeks off, then I
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: do feel that overwhelm kind of building and building and building.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: And then I do another brain dump and it's just amazing.
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: So please give it a go. And I love that
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: this episode is coming out on a Sunday because that
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: is when I often like to do my, my, you know,
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: like where I set up my week mentally in my
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: own head, Sunday afternoon or a Sunday morning. I love it. Anyway,
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. I hope it
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: was fruitful and I hope that you can kind of yeah,
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: feel really good about your Sunday. If you're someone that
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: has Sunday scaries, where you kind of feel anxious about
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: the week ahead, this is a really good thing to
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: do on a Sunday afternoon. You're going to feel just empowered,
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: like you've taken control of your week again. Anyway, that
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: is the episode of today. Yeah, I hope you enjoyed it.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: And as always, remember, be kind to yourself, be kind
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: to your brain, don't take shit from anyone, and especially
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: don't take shit from yourself. Danke.