Latest / On Deathcare / Carlton Maye Jr. on Service, Advocacy, and the Future of Education

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Carlton Maye Jr. on Service, Advocacy, and the Future of Education · On Deathcare

• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: I am Tony Russo,
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: and this is On the Clock,
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: where we talk to funeral professionals about who they are,
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: what they do,
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: and why they do what they do.
• 0:14
  We are in the middle of an NFDA series where we're talking to
• 0:19
  as many of the
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: candidates for the NFDA board that we can get our hands on.
• 0:25
  And today we're speaking with Carlton May Jr.,
• 0:28
  who is running for the secretary position.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome, Carlton.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: Hi, thank you, Tony, and thank you so much for having me today.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: It is an honor to speak with you today.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm very excited to talk to you.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: We had a nice little pre-interview that's going to have to be in a longer
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: conversation,
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: but let's have a shorter conversation right now.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: So you've been on the board for two years.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: Why run for secretary?
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: What is different about running for secretary?
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, honestly, Tony, for me, it comes down to service.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: And I am a servant.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_01: I look at myself as a servant, and I'm willing to serve in any capacity.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: Over the past two years,
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_01: I've been fortunate,
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: like you stated,
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: to serve on the board as an at-large representative,
• 1:15
  and that experience really opened my eyes to the kind of impact
• 1:20
  we can have beyond
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_01: our funeral homes.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_01: It showed me that
• 1:25
  You know,
• 1:25
  when we come together as a profession,
• 1:28
  we can truly shape the future.
• 1:31
  And not just for ourselves or our own hidden agendas or for our
• 1:35
  own profitability,
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: but for the families and the communities we serve.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: And I can just tell you right now,
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: due to our previous conversation that we had,
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_01: I care deeply about where this profession is headed.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_01: For me, it starts with education.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: And education and,
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: of course,
• 1:54
  the dissemination of information to make sure everyone is aware
• 1:58
  and making sure our
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: members have access to timely,
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_01: relevant knowledge so they can continue to serve at the highest level.
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  So secretary is definitely the keeper of all of that
• 2:12
  information into ensuring that
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: accurate information from the board is collected.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_01: and obtained and kept for record keeping.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: And as long as you kind of brought it up,
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: I want to talk a little bit about your experience as an at-large member.
• 2:28
  Do you have any particular memories of something that you got
• 2:32
  to do as an at-large
• 2:33
  member that were both fulfilling and also made you see what the
• 2:38
  possibilities for
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: being on the board are?
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah,
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: so one of the things that I would state,
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: this position started in 24,
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: and I came on when we were,
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: when the board was going through,
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_01: going back through the core values.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: and being open to rebranding as core values.
• 3:00
  And one of the things that stood out to me is that we want to
• 3:04
  be the largest
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: association of funeral association to where not only students can come,
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_01: non-licensed could come,
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: owners could come,
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  but licensed professionals can come and they can receive the
• 3:20
  value information.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so we wanted to make sure that we
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: brought in our core values to be open for all.
• 3:27
  And we changed that verbiage in our mission that we are the
• 3:31
  association of funeral
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  SPEAKER_01: service for all,
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: you know,
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: not just even beyond here in the States,
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_01: but even
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: even beyond, because we have active membership beyond the US.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_01: And so when you put that out there and you're stating,
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_01: hey,
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_01: we are here for all funeral professionals,
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: regardless,
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  SPEAKER_01: that was a major hit for me that we're acceptive to this.
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  SPEAKER_01: And we were a part of that push.
• 4:00
  And I'm glad that I was a member of the board at this time to
• 4:03
  bring my value of how
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  SPEAKER_01: I see it,
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  SPEAKER_01: not just from a funeral director,
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  and a general partner running a funeral home in my community,
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  but as an educator as well.
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  And what I'm seeing and the trends I'm seeing of students
• 4:19
  evolving into different
• 4:20
  types of students that are coming into the industry and the
• 4:24
  interest that they
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  SPEAKER_01: share.
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  SPEAKER_00: And kind of along those lines, what value do you see in these
• 4:32
  And in the NFDA conference and in the different opportunities
• 4:36
  that funeral
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  professionals have to get together during the year over the
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  course of these
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  SPEAKER_00: meetings in general,
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  SPEAKER_00: these opportunities to kind of.
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  SPEAKER_01: So the value that I see is not just the one-year convention,
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  which is the international convention that everyone would love
• 4:56
  to come to in
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  SPEAKER_01: October,
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  SPEAKER_01: but it stems down even from the
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: PwC,
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  SPEAKER_01: which is the professional women's conference,
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  SPEAKER_01: the students of the female community that's in this profession,
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  SPEAKER_01: that they have a safe place that they can go.
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  SPEAKER_01: They can feel welcome.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: They can feel nourished.
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  SPEAKER_01: They can feel enriched.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: And they're having those seminars to be able to come to.
• 5:25
  One which is my ultimate favorite is advocacy,
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  going to the Capitol to heal,
• 5:31
  to advocate for.
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  SPEAKER_01: for our industry of those laws and those changes that are coming about.
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  There are a lot of students that love,
• 5:39
  they were like,
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  I didn't know that I could participate.
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  SPEAKER_01: And it's like,
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: yes,
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  you can participate in these things where we have the meet the
• 5:45
  mentors program that
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  SPEAKER_01: come as well.
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  SPEAKER_01: So all of those things that derive around it,
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_01: and then even throughout the year when we have our virtual trainings,
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: our cremation certification training that we have,
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: our arranger training.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: Which is done.
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  And I've had the opportunity to take part in all of the
• 6:09
  throughout that going
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  SPEAKER_01: around our restorative art programs that go to the different schools and
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: institutions.
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  SPEAKER_01: These things to help everyone to participate.
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  SPEAKER_01: that it's not just a once a year gathering that we come to,
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  SPEAKER_01: but all throughout the year,
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  we're able to offer and meet the needs of everyone at whatever
• 6:31
  capacity is your
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: strength or your weakness.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: Because let's be real,
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: cookie cutter short in,
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_01: you know,
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_01: maybe years when I came along,
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: you were either a great funeral director or
• 6:43
  or you were a great embalmer,
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  or you could be versatile where you have both capabilities.
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  But now it is so many different aspects in the funeral service
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  industry where you
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_01: could be a wonderful crematory operator.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: You could be a crematory arranger.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_01: You could be that wonderful...
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_01: liaison between, hey, the funeral home and the cemetery portion of it.
• 7:10
  If your firm owns a cemetery,
• 7:14
  you could be that ambassador,
• 7:15
  that ambassador for the families.
• 7:20
  There are so many different levels that you could be a master
• 7:23
  at now,
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  and NFDA offers that.
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  SPEAKER_01: to its members who is a member that,
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: hey,
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  you can find that's a plethora of information that we offer to
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  make sure that we
• 7:36
  are giving the most accurate and the most current information
• 7:41
  to everyone.
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  SPEAKER_00: Kind of along those lines, I mean, you hit on ACFA's KC.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: So have you gone yet for this year?
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: You're going in a couple of weeks.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: No.
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  SPEAKER_01: So we're set to go next week, actually.
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  SPEAKER_01: We will be there 15th through the 17th.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: But as a board member, I'll be there early.
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  SPEAKER_01: We'll be.
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  SPEAKER_01: having board meetings, but the advocacy itself starts the 15th.
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  SPEAKER_01: And it is an awesome time.
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  I've already had a couple of members that their first time
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  going was me encouraging
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  SPEAKER_01: them to come last year.
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  SPEAKER_01: They had
• 8:13
  so much fun they had a ball i've received text message carlton
• 8:17
  i'm booked i'm ready
• 8:18
  i'll see you at advocacy i had so much fun being having the
• 8:22
  opportunity to share my
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  view to legislators you know in my state and and moving forward
• 8:28
  and to seeing the
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: my voice being heard do you um give
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  People advice now when they come along like do you say okay
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  this is how do you how
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  do you prepare other people to come with you and what did you
• 8:42
  learn from your first
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  SPEAKER_00: advocacy experience that you now pass on or you remember every time like.
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  SPEAKER_00: What was an early takeaway lesson from advocacy?
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  SPEAKER_01: I would say the early takeaway from advocacy was we sit back as a child.
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  We grew up learning about government,
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  learning about the different branches of government.
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  SPEAKER_01: But we don't know the full detail that the consumer,
• 9:14
  the constituents have that they could have a voice to go and be
• 9:19
  heard and to
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  SPEAKER_01: actually walk the halls of these different branches of government.
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  SPEAKER_01: You have that opportunity.
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  SPEAKER_01: You know, when I grew up, we learned about the branches.
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  SPEAKER_01: We learned about voting and we knew how to do it.
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  SPEAKER_01: And that was it.
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  SPEAKER_01: But getting involved and being on Capitol Hill is breathtaking.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I tell everyone who wants to experience it,
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  SPEAKER_01: come out and experience it for yourself one time.
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  SPEAKER_01: I promise you, you'll fall in love.
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  SPEAKER_01: Because you...
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  SPEAKER_01: Not only see them on television,
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: your congressperson,
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  but you can see them in real life and you get to meet their
• 9:57
  staff and see how hard
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  SPEAKER_01: their staff works behind the scene.
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  And the interns that are young interns that's coming along and
• 10:07
  they're learning the ropes of it.
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  SPEAKER_01: That was very impactful for me is what I enjoyed.
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  SPEAKER_01: And so going into your next question,
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  What I do to encourage people,
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  of course,
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  we're in an age of digital age.
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  And one of the things that I do is once those students or meet
• 10:29
  the mentors,
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  SPEAKER_01: they show up and they come,
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  SPEAKER_01: I ensure that I ask them,
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  SPEAKER_01: take a photo with your congressperson.
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  SPEAKER_01: share it and also let's share that you're here on capitol that is a photo
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  opportunity how many times do we get to go to capitol hill and
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  take a picture on
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  the hill and say hey i was here i'm working on your behalf for
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  those that were were
• 10:56
  not fortunate to come this time and showing you would be
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  surprised at how many
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  SPEAKER_01: times i hear in my classroom my students say oh my god
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  SPEAKER_01: Professor, I saw you were at Capitol Hill.
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  SPEAKER_01: I saw you were with this student.
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  SPEAKER_01: I saw, oh, my God, I want to be involved.
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  SPEAKER_01: You actually got to speak with,
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  SPEAKER_01: you know,
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  SPEAKER_01: the representative of my state,
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  SPEAKER_01: which could be Tennessee.
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  SPEAKER_01: It could be South Carolina, Georgia.
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  SPEAKER_01: Nebraska, you know, Michigan, you got to speak with Monica.
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  SPEAKER_01: Or if I didn't get to speak with you,
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  SPEAKER_01: I took a picture by their sign and their staff person and say,
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  SPEAKER_01: hey,
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  SPEAKER_01: I was here.
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  And that goes a long way to motivate them that,
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  you know,
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  I want to do the exact same thing.
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  SPEAKER_00: Excellent.
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  SPEAKER_00: And just briefly,
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  SPEAKER_00: with the couple minutes we have left,
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  SPEAKER_00: you said that education was kind of an important topic for you.
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  What do you see in funeral education over the next five years
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  or so,
• 11:53
  three years even?
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  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to be honest.
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  SPEAKER_01: Education is going to have to change in a lot of ways because...
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: You may have left out that you are an educator, right?
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I'm sorry.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_01: I am an educator.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm an educator at heart.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: I love teaching.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: I teach Monterey Science for Pierce Monterey Colleges.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: I love it.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: I've been in higher education altogether going on almost 15 years.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: And I love it.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: I love what I do.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: But education is essential to me.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: It is the root, the foundation.
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  And making sure that we're staying relevant and knowledgeable
• 12:41
  so that we can
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: continue to serve at a highest level is key.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_01: It's also about evolving with the current times.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: The education is going to have to evolve with the current times.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_01: We have we have to.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: In our education, we have to remain open-minded.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_01: We have to stay aligned with the industry trends.
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  And we have to be responsive to the change and the changes of
• 13:06
  people because people change.
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  And the people depend on us in a profession that we're the
• 13:13
  professionals.
• 13:15
  They depend on us every day to say,
• 13:17
  hey,
• 13:18
  lead us and guide us in the right direction.
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  SPEAKER_01: And it's just as important for us.
• 13:24
  to have the education and to change with the times so that way
• 13:28
  we can lead them and
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: we can be purpose-driven leaders in this,
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  because we have the responsibility to lead in a way that not
• 13:37
  only strengthens
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: where we are today,
• 13:39
  but also empowers and prepares the next generation that's
• 13:43
  coming behind us to carry
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: this profession forward.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: And so with that said,
• 13:49
  those are the priorities we really need to reflect on in the
• 13:53
  education to not
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_01: forget where we come from.
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  We have to honor our traditions that really defines us while
• 14:02
  also positioning
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_01: ourselves to continue to grow.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: And so we're going to have to grow.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: And we're going to have to continue to stay current.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: And we're going to have to continue to evolve.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I'll share this.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_01: And if I have one moment, I'll share this one.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, please.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_01: There's something that just came out recently.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in the state of Georgia.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_01: I reside in Georgia.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: And so this is my home.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: We saw this thing came out that's talked about human composting.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: which is a big topic now.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I had a client to walk in one day into the funeral and say,
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_01: Carlton,
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_01: could you tell me about human composting?
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: I think I want to look into that.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't have a brochure.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't have any knowledge.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_01: And I said,
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_01: yes,
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_01: I said,
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: if you give me a moment,
• 14:51
  I will get back with you and I will give you all the
• 14:54
  information that you need.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: So I felt a little bit behind the ball, the eight ball.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_01: But I got on the horn.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_01: I went with it.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_01: Because when you think about it and,
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_01: you know,
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_01: being from the South and you think about it,
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_01: it's like,
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_01: well,
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_01: now me personally,
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like,
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: oh,
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: no,
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: I don't I don't want.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_01: But.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_01: Not my personal opinion, thinking about human composting.
• 15:18
  I took the steps to get knowledge on it so that I can educate
• 15:23
  those people.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_01: And when I say those people,
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_01: the people that depend on me to lead them during their time of sorrow and
• 15:31
  bereavement and their exercise and their right of disposition
• 15:35
  and what they want to
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: choose to celebrate their loved one.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: I had to get the education and gain the knowledge.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_01: And so that's what I did.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_01: So for me,
• 15:46
  I felt like it's just natural that we have to continue to
• 15:51
  evolve and continue to
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_01: take the education with us as we evolve.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_00: That is absolutely fantastic.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: And thank you so much.
• 15:59
  I love that part at the end because one of the things that I've
• 16:01
  been banging the
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: drum about more and more recently,
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_00: so thank you for putting like a little button on it,
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: is this idea that every time a state passes –
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_00: Natural organic reduction.
• 16:13
  It's really just an opportunity for people to come into your
• 16:16
  funeral home and like
• 16:17
  it gets exactly into the funeral home and show them how good
• 16:22
  you are with people.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_01: And that's what I did.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: I reached out.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_01: I reached.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_01: out to a company.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we got sponsors.
• 16:32
  We brought the company down to Georgia to educate funeral
• 16:36
  directors on it.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_01: And let me tell you, you would be surprised at
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: When we were educated on it,
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: and how many funeral directors stated,
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_01: we love the fact that education is there.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: You're not eliminating funeral directors.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_01: You're still partnering with funeral.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: And funeral directors, they were open to it.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_01: And now there were the other half of the room that said, you know what?
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_01: I don't care for it.
• 17:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want it.
• 17:02
  But thank you for the knowledge so I can offer it to those
• 17:06
  clients who say,
• 17:07
  yes,
• 17:08
  I want it.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: So it wasn't a closed minded issue.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't a closed minded.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_01: And that's what education is all about.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_01: Fantastic.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you so much for your time and for sharing your story with me.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so like I stated for you,
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_01: I close out just saying to you,
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: thank you,
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: Tony,
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: again,
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: for reaching out to having me.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: Because for me,
• 17:30
  running for secretary of NFDA just feels like the natural next
• 17:36
  step for me,
• 17:37
  an opportunity to serve on a larger scale and give back to a
• 17:41
  profession that has
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_01: already given me so much.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much.