Latest / DidiLawren / Alpha Females Taking Back Their Power - Funke Akindele, Chacha Eke and Anita Okoye

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Alpha Females Taking Back Their Power - Funke Akindele, Chacha Eke and Anita Okoye · DidiLawren

• 0:31
  Hello and welcome back to another episode of banter
• 0:34
  Florencia on DeLorean TV channel, that celebrates
• 0:38
  ordinary people doing extraordinary things.
• 0:41
  So please subscribe, like, share, and also click on the
• 0:45
  notification bail to get notified anytime of posting
• 0:48
  content. So for today's episode, I want
• 0:51
  to talk about Alpha females. Yes.
• 0:55
  This phrase has been used a whole lot of times for the past
• 0:59
  you know, few. Days after JJC skills, announced
• 1:05
  his separation, from Nollywood actress from kuryakin daily
• 1:10
  Bellow. So, let me just give you a recap
• 1:14
  fungi can delete margin JJC and their marriage has been having
• 1:20
  problems for the past two years and all of a sudden JJC decided
• 1:26
  to announce his separation from no ludicrous think I can deal.
• 1:29
  Ali. Now, one of the major reasons
• 1:32
  why it became a very hot topic is because funky, I can delay.
• 1:38
  According to JJC, she asked him to leave the house.
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  So from all indications full Ki can delete is the owner of the
• 1:47
  house or she let me put it this way.
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  According to people, she is the most successful one.
• 1:54
  So, because of the fact that she asked him to leave the house
• 1:59
  that became a Bunch of. There are so many speculations
• 2:02
  about men, marrying women who are more successful because
• 2:06
  according to them, these women are going to one day.
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  Change the mass of the house, just like Frank.
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  I can delay D to JJC. When you talk about Alpha,
• 2:17
  females, it basically means a female or a woman who is able to
• 2:23
  make decision on her own. She's a go-getter.
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  She's a leader. She is somebody that can Stand
• 2:30
  on her own, she's very successful.
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  Let's say not even successful in the sense of financial success
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  but she is somebody that wasn't what she puts sets.
• 2:40
  Her mind to do. She's going to get that in done.
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  What we talked about alpha male, nobody is frowning at these
• 2:45
  things because they feel this is what a man should do, or this,
• 2:50
  is how a man should be for. I don't understand when it comes
• 2:54
  to women, you know, they just think we're supposed to be.
• 3:00
  females that the other room, Practicing gymnastic at the
• 3:05
  other room. But when it comes to your
• 3:07
  career, when you come to your choice of way of life or how you
• 3:12
  want to live your life, they don't expect you to be a leader.
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  Really expect you to be able to have a mind of your own and make
• 3:22
  decisions that suits. You, what's let me break it down
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  to you the generation before us raised our females and this may
• 3:32
  come as a shock to lat. People but I don't think it is.
• 3:35
  It should be that shocking. Let's say you have children
• 3:38
  initially in the olden days or that's it to three generations
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  back especially in Africa. They don't send the females to
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  school. So the females are home learning
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  how to cook learning how to take care of the home learning how to
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  just be a supportive partner to whoever they're going to be
• 4:02
  married to While the men go out there, the haunts, the farm,
• 4:08
  whatever they need to do, or if a family, let's say family lies.
• 4:12
  No, like financially. Well to do this end, just the
• 4:16
  mill to school and not the females, so this meal, they go
• 4:20
  to school, they get education. And then they married wives, who
• 4:23
  come, you know, into their home's to Bear children to cook
• 4:27
  and take care of them. So, this is the women, rule are
• 4:31
  limited to that. Specific just notarized and you
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  do baby-making machines. So these are what we used to be
• 4:41
  in the olden days. So when you talk about our
• 4:43
  familles, then these are people who probably are able to go to
• 4:48
  school Against All Odds, or able to, you know, farm at a very
• 4:53
  large scale. When you talk about this family,
• 4:56
  they tell you all that song, he is a very industrious or lost.
• 5:01
  Russell industrial Zone. And that is fine and nobody
• 5:05
  raises an eyebrow to these things.
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  But when it comes to this, you know, the current generation.
• 5:11
  If you have two children a boy and a girl, you're going to give
• 5:15
  them the same educational qualification.
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  In fact, if it is the girl that says, she wants to do a PhD, and
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  the boy wants to go into business.
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  You have no choice than to train your girl child to the highest
• 5:30
  level of, you know, education that she wants to ask.
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  You can afford it sometimes even if you cannot afford this, some
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  of these very smart ego girls or women, they get scholarship,
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  they go to school and they get all the qualification that they
• 5:46
  want regardless of the background that they are from.
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  Now, we have females or women who are in leadership position,
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  who take strategic positions who are able to make strategic
• 5:58
  decisions. When we talk about Nollywood
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  you, Nigeria, we may run Nollywood Could we can sit down
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  and tell ourselves that all the actresses in Nigeria.
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  Are, you know, prostitutes. This is how they make their
• 6:10
  money but we forget to understand that Nollywood is the
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  third largest movie production company in Nigeria, in the
• 6:19
  world. Not even in Nigeria, we have.
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  When you have, we talked about Hollywood, we talked about
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  Bollywood and then comes Nollywood.
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  That is how the structure is whether you want to admit it or
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  not. We took out so many movies per
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  year and with all these streaming services, we have
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  YouTube, we have Netflix, we have your own private, we have
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  your Roku TV, we have channels cable TVs, that all these movies
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  are shown. These are multiple streams of
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  income. Actors in Nigeria are taking
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  full advantage of these things. Especially the women, they are
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  producing. They are writing producing.
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  When we talk about king of boys, can me a date.
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  Diva. She is a powerhouse on her own.
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  I am an alpha female, I don't apologize for that.
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  I am somebody, that knows what I want.
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  I go for what I want, regardless of what anybody thinks.
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  As long as I am, not affecting you in any way as long as that
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  will bring success to me or fulfillment to me.
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  I'm going to go ahead and do that.
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  Does that sound? You know bad it doesn't sound
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  bad but when you not put that that sweet a man and you're
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  making decisions regardless of what a man is saying, then it
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  becomes a bad thing, but when you see a man making the same
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  decision and now from you making decision, regardless of what the
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  wife things or what do other milk kinds of bad things, people
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  see them as decision-makers an authority figure or somebody
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  that has to do with, you know, they just have a all these
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  connotations that they put when it comes to a man.
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  But when it comes to a woman, the citizen bad thing, I don't
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  understand that I will never understand that.
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  I mean, we talked about Charter a few days ago and one of the
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  major reasons. Arkady, allegedly.
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  One of the major reasons that their marriage started, having
• 8:21
  problems or said I've been abusive was the fact that
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  Cha-Cha was the one bringing the money.
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  The husband was the one directing so Cha-Cha could
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  decide not to even walk with the husband because She doesn't walk
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  with the husband or the production company.
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  He does not make money because you cannot pay somebody on
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  Charles level. So she's basically working for
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  free, trying to grow this business together with her
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  husband, but when she started trying to say, okay, let me make
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  some money outside. I'm a bankable actress.
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  I can make money, I can influence, I can do this.
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  I can do that regardless of whether married or not that
• 9:00
  became a problem. That's was when all the whole
• 9:02
  Allah. Alleged abuse started and the
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  man was thinking you know respecting me you know being
• 9:08
  submissive you are cannot control.
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  You you're going out there to do certain things you're cheating.
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  You they bring up all sorts of things that's even allegations
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  that you have to just to bring you down mentally and
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  psychologically. And once a woman decides enough
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  is enough, she becomes, you know, the bad person they say
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  she has changed because she made money.
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  Well, she has changed because she's now the one any money for
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  the family. That is not true.
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  That is not true. Now, bringing it back to Funky,
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  I can delete from calculus one making Hindu JJC.
• 9:47
  He is also successful in his own right, but he was living in the
• 9:52
  UK. And Frank are a very successful
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  movie producer actress interpretation or 4K.
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  Has its she has a hand In different pies and she's making
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  money out of it. Now, she do know how they linked
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  opened. They got married JJ.
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  See how to move from the UK to Nigeria?
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  One of the alleged reasons why their marriage didn't work?
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  Was because of mismanagement of funds, all the parts of JJC
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  instead of spending money, lavishly and unnecessarily.
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  And that course, one of some of the problems in their marriage
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  and then she he was it Cheating on top of that, he was cheating.
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  Now if you have an alpha female that you're married to, or
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  you're dating that is bringing in the bread and then on top of
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  it or you're cheating, she is going to decide one day.
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  This is enough, I've had enough of you.
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  I've had enough of your troubles and I am not going to deal with
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  you anymore. Now, everybody is Raising
• 10:57
  eyebrows because she is the one making money.
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  So, let me just take this back to say, Somebody else an alpha
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  male that is what making money and the Wolves you file for
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  divorce because he couldn't keep it in his pants.
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  P Square Hole Ocoee, his wife allegedly filed for divorce in
• 11:19
  2020. Citing irreconcilable
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  differences. Citing that he was cheating.
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  Not just with anybody but also he cheated.
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  He would, he was sleeping with their household.
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  That was how bad it is. I mean just imagine called orko
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  allegedly, just imagine with his famous personality, he could get
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  anybody, he wants, but the fact that he was even sleeping all
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  those people and he decided to even sleep is his house.
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  Hope you could see how low you could see how that could affect
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  any woman and he allegedly was With this lady for a very long
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  time, before the wife said enough is enough and she filed
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  for divorce. Now, everybody was at that
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  point. People will also blaming Anita
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  or Qui why she trying to bring down Paulo Coelho.
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  Because according to them, when they got marriage was nothing,
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  she was this was that he made her who she is and now that he
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  is very successful. She is trying to clean him out.
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  When a woman come on. To say that I am not willing to
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  take bullshit from, you know, anybody, what'd I tell ya
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  partner, their husbands or whatever?
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  That is, first of all, they will look at you and think you should
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  successful. You should won't bring it in the
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  money, is she? This is shiva's.
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  If she's one, that is bringing in the money, then the success
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  has gone into her head. The husband cannot control her
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  or do we just do find something to blame her then if she's not
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  one bringing in the money, Then she must be trying to, you know,
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  bring the Mind down or clean the man out for thinking about all
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  these scenarios. And example, I want to ask the
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  question, would we rather bring up women?
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  That's emotionally on intelligence emotionally down
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  people that cannot make decisions.
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  People that regardless of the educational qualifications,
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  regardless of their intelligence, they are happy to
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  just take their life. And putting a man's hands.
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  They cannot make decisions on their own regardless of the
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  situation. They are in, let's say in a
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  marriage in a relationship, if your sister come in and tell you
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  that I am making this amount of money, my husband is pending
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  everything, chasing anything in skirts trade, buying anything
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  you wants to buy, while not even contributing towards building,
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  the kind of Empire that I want to build.
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  Would you tell your sister, would you tell your sister to
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  stay in that relationship or to stay in that Union?
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  Just because she needs to be submissive.
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  Just because she needs to be in a man needs to be in control of
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  everything. She does.
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  If you would not tell your sister that, why would you not
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  think that it is okay for somebody else's daughter to be
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  in that situation and see bear everything just Because you
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  don't should do not want to appear to be an alpha female.
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  Now, let me put this straight, there's nothing wrong with being
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  an alpha female. Like when you bring up a child,
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  you teach them to be confidence. You teach them to be
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  independent, you teach them to be to take care of yourself.
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  And when they go out there to do all those things, the society,
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  as a whole, even you you may not judge your daughter, you may not
• 15:01
  judge your sister. As long as you're in Georgian
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  another female out there, you are judging your sister, you
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  draw it in your mother, Jordan, your child.
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  So how do we even start breaking this down?
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  How do we stop this abusive cycle?
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  Would you still say I don't want to marry somebody that is
• 15:20
  successful. When you're training your child
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  to be successful when you're training, you want your children
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  to the be the best of the best, you want to give them every the
• 15:30
  possible best our life can offer.
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  But then you see somebody's child, you're saying, she is so
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  successful my liking, she is 2 alpha female for my liking.
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  She is to this for she is sudha. I think we as a society for us
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  to grow as a people, we have to take responsibility or some of
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  the things that is affecting us. If we cannot put women in
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  certain situations or in certain positions, just because they are
• 15:59
  females, just because you think, oh, if we put them in that
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  position They're going to come out and control us or they're
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  going to come out and rule over us.
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  That is not going to help us people.
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  That is not going to move our society forward.
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  How do we solve this problem? Honestly, I don't know because
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  it's it just like we have we are solving the problem but we don't
• 16:24
  want to acknowledge the solution that we are getting.
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  We need to change our mindsets if we want if we actually want
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  our Our country or our continent improve.
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  So this is where I'm going to end in this conversation today.
• 16:39
  Thank you very much for watching.
• 16:41
  Bye.