Latest / The Kevin Stone Podcast / Episode #17 "You Should Start A Podcast"

Transcript

Episode #17 "You Should Start A Podcast" · The Kevin Stone Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Kevin Stone Podcast. The podcast that proves
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: you don't actually need an audience to have broadcasting equipment.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: You just need a microphone, an internet connection, and an
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: unhealthy amount of confidence. And today I want to talk
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: about something I believe every small-time podcaster eventually experiences. Friends.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: specifically the friends who convince you to start a podcast
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: and then never listen to the darn thing. You know
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: who you are. Oh, yes. This episode is for you.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: And don't worry about me talking about you on the podcast.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: You'll never hear it. That's the beauty of the whole argument.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: You should totally start a podcast. It always starts innocently.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: You're sitting around talking with some friends. Maybe you're complaining
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: about something. Maybe you're telling a story. Maybe you're giving
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: your opinion about why the grocery store rearranged the cereal aisle.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: and somebody says kevin you should start a podcast somebody
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: else agrees oh man absolutely and somebody else says i'd
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: listen to that and there it is the lie i'd
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: listen to that those four words have probably launched a
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: thousand podcasts so you start thinking about it maybe they're
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: right maybe i should start a podcast people seem to
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: like listening to me i've got opinions i've got stories
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: i got a phone i've got absolutely no broadcasting qualifications
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: whatsoever i'm ready But you don't just start talking on
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: your phone. Oh no, not you. Once you've watched three
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: YouTube videos about podcasting, suddenly you're Walter Cronkite. You need equipment,
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: a microphone, a mixer, headphones, microphone boom arm, editing software, artwork, hosting, website.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Pretty soon you've spent several hundred dollars to tell a
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: story you could have told for free at the Waffle House.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: But that's okay. Because your friends are going to listen. Remember?
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: They promised. I'd listen to that. So you spend two
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: hours recording episode one. Three hours editing it. Another hour
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: trying to figure out why your voice sounds like you're
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: talking from inside a refrigerator. And then finally, you hit publish.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: This is it. Your broadcasting career has officially begun. You
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: post it on Facebook. Everybody, episode one of my new
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: podcast is live. And then you wait. Five minutes? Nothing.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: Ten minutes? Nothing. Twenty minutes? Somebody likes to post. Yes!
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: Then you realize it's your old roommate. He didn't listen.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: He just likes everything you post because he's supportive. But
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: that's okay. The friends will be here soon. After all,
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: these are the people who told you to start the podcast.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: A couple hours later, you check your numbers. Three downloads. Three?
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: You're practically Joe Rogan. Then you remember that you downloaded
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: it twice yourself just to make sure it worked. So technically,
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: one person listened. And you're not entirely sure that that
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: wasn't a bot. Now you start asking your friends, Hey,
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: did you listen to the podcast? And suddenly everybody becomes
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: extremely busy. Oh man, not yet. I've been meaning to. Really?
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: It's been three weeks, Tyrone. The episode's ten minutes long.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: You've watched five football games on YouTube since Tuesday. But
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: somehow you ain't found ten minutes. Another friend says, I
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: got it saved. Oh, wonderful. My podcast is apparently being
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: aged like a fine wine. Maybe you'll listen to episode
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: one sometime around 2034. Then there's my favorite. I don't
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: really listen to podcasts. You're the one that told me
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: to start the dang thing. That's like convincing your buddy
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: to open a sushi restaurant and then saying, I don't
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: really eat fish. We'll be right back after this important
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: commercial message. And if nobody bought an ad for today's show, congratulations.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: This commercial break is sponsored by me. I've been supporting
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: this podcast since episode one. Mostly because apparently nobody else will.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Welcome back, all three of you. If you're actually listening
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: right now, thank you. Seriously. Because statistically, there's a pretty
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: good chance I know you personally. And if I don't,
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: welcome to the family. Now you're officially more supportive of
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: this podcast than several people in my contact list. Podcast
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: hosting companies give you analytics. Analytics. This is both wonderful
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: and emotionally devastating, because now you can actually see exactly
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: how many people aren't listening to you. You upload an episode, refresh, zero, refresh, zero, refresh, one. Yes,
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: somebody listened. Where? You check the location. Germany. Germany? I
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: don't know anybody in Germany. Apparently, some guy named Hans
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: believes in me more than my friends do. Thank you, Hans.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: You're now executive producer. But there's something I've started realizing.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: Maybe having a tiny audience isn't bad. Because when nobody's listening,
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: you have tremendous freedom. I could say, next week, we're
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: interviewing Tom Hanks. Nobody's going to challenge me. I could announce,
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: the Kevin Stone podcast is now the number one podcast
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: in Luxembourg. Who's checking? I could say, due to overwhelming
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: listener demand, we've extended today's episode. What overwhelming listener demand?
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: My cat looked interested. That's enough. All jokes aside, I
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: think there's a lesson in this. We spend a lot
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: of time waiting for people we know to support the
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: things we create. Sometimes they do. Sometimes they don't. But
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: maybe that's not the point. Because if you're enjoying doing something,
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: do it anyway. Maybe five people listen. Maybe 50. Maybe
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: someday 5,000. Or maybe your podcast remains you sitting behind
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: a microphone talking to three people and a confused German
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: named Hans. But you're creating something. You're learning something. You're
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: getting better. And somewhere out there might be one person
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: who genuinely enjoys hearing what you have to say. That's
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: reason enough to hit record again. So to all the
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: friends who said, you should start a podcast. Thank you.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: You encouraged me. You motivated me. You helped push me
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: into doing something I probably would have talked myself out of.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: But I do have one small request. Listen to the
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: darn podcast. You don't even have to pay attention. Put
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: it on while you're mowing. Play it while you're driving.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: Turn it on while you're cleaning the garage. Heck, play
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: it for your dog. I need the download. And the
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: next time you see me, don't say, man, I've been
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: meaning to check out your show because now I'm going
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: to ask. Oh, really? What's your favorite episode? And if
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: your answer is, uh, I know. So if you're listening
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: to this episode right now, thank you. Whether you're a friend, family,
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: regular listener, or somebody who accidentally clicked the wrong podcast
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: and is now too polite to leave, I appreciate you.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: And if you've ever created something that nobody seems to notice,
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: a podcast, a YouTube channel, a book, music, artwork, whatever
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: it is, keep making it. Because everybody starts with zero listeners.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Everybody starts with zero followers. Everybody starts with nobody knowing
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: who they are. The only way to guarantee nobody will
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: ever discover what you're doing is to stop doing it.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: So I'll keep recording. I'll keep talking. I'll keep uploading episodes,
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: even if nobody listens. Because apparently, I'm perfectly capable of
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: entertaining myself. I'm Kevin Stone. This has been the Kevin
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Stone Podcast. The podcast your friends told you to start,
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: but apparently forgot to subscribe to. I'll talk to you
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: next time, assuming anybody's out there. This concludes our broadcast day.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Good night, and God bless America.