Latest / Apostle Lazarus Femi / Practical Things To Put In Place Before You Marry (Part 2)

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Practical Things To Put In Place Before You Marry (Part 2) · Apostle Lazarus Femi

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  Speaker 1: Apostle Femi Lazarus is a man raised by God to
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  Speaker 1: demonstrate his wisdom and authority to the last day church.
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  Speaker 1: He is the lead pastor of Sphere of Light Church
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  Speaker 1: and God told him years ago that a time will
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  Speaker 1: come where my wisdom will be needed to navigate tough
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  Speaker 1: times in the body of Christ.
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  Speaker 2: Then I will cause your voice to be heard.
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  Speaker 1: And all who pay attention to my word on your
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  Speaker 1: lips will not lack light and direction. He is a
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  Speaker 1: man sent from God, sent to raise God's end time armies.
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  Speaker 1: With Apostle Fermi Lazarus, every minute counts as you listen attentively.
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  Speaker 2: Alright, so I started a subtopic practical things to put
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  Speaker 2: in place before you marry or before you get married.
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  Speaker 2: So I'd like us to please turn our Bibles, check
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  Speaker 2: this very important text. The book of Genesis, chapter number 2. Genesis,
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  Speaker 2: chapter number 2. Alright, I'm just going to paraphrase the story.
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  Speaker 2: You know the story. God had created the heavens and
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  Speaker 2: the earth. He had established all things. Then He placed
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  Speaker 2: man there to exercise dominion. Amen. Amen. He placed man
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  Speaker 2: in the garden to accept dominion, placed man in his presence.
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  Speaker 2: Then God looked at the man, having given him all
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  Speaker 2: those things, and God said, it is not good for
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  Speaker 2: that man to be alone. God never said it is
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  Speaker 2: not good for every man to be alone. He said
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  Speaker 2: it is not good for that kind of man to
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  Speaker 2: be alone. And when I laid the foundation of this series,
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  Speaker 2: one of the first things we were able to do
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  Speaker 2: is to remove some block of safety. And I had
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  Speaker 2: to first show you How that the union of Adam
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  Speaker 2: and Eve is not the kind that we have now.
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  Speaker 2: Many things were unique to their own reality. That is
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  Speaker 2: a lot different now. Is that okay now? And I
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  Speaker 2: said things like, Adam never had a reason or any
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  Speaker 2: need to pray about the will of God in marriage.
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  Speaker 2: After all, there was just one woman. He never had
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  Speaker 2: reason to say whether he wants the tall one or
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  Speaker 2: the not so tall one or the chubby one or
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  Speaker 2: the not so chubby one. Because there was no option.
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  Speaker 2: And the Bible didn't bother giving us the physical description
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  Speaker 2: of what the Eve looked like. Because as far as
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  Speaker 2: destiny is concerned, it doesn't matter. Before you go to
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  Speaker 2: the gym to trim down, be sure you are convenient
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  Speaker 2: with what you have. Because if you go out of
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  Speaker 2: hate for yourself, you will get bigger. Because your body
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  Speaker 2: hormones will pick the signal. You'll be stressed out. Do
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  Speaker 2: you understand what I'm saying? The Bible never bothered to
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  Speaker 2: mention many things about physique, about the size of boats
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  Speaker 2: and all those things. But they didn't matter in destiny.
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  Speaker 2: So why do they matter now? Well, I will just
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  Speaker 2: say one word. We are exposed to a lot of corruption.
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  Speaker 2: Now that's not me trying to be unrealistic and say,
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  Speaker 2: we're getting these things. But now what are you talking about?
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  Speaker 2: That's the fact. Do you understand me Do you understand
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  Speaker 2: what I'm saying? Good. So there are many things. There
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  Speaker 2: are people who are doing marriage wrongly. And there are
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  Speaker 2: people who are not married that must not marry the
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  Speaker 2: way they are. They do, it will be disastrous to
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  Speaker 2: ever find them, whether male or female. And marriage is
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  Speaker 2: so powerful that if you get it wrong, you'll be spent. Yes.
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  Speaker 2: You'll be spent. You see, yes, one thing that amazed me,
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  Speaker 2: and I did not really come to this full understanding
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  Speaker 2: until I got married. So there are many things you
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  Speaker 2: may not come to really understand and take probably as
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  Speaker 2: serious as it should. You can't learn them through theory.
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  Speaker 2: The only reason you're glad you are married is when
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  Speaker 2: you marry the right person. If you marry the wrong person,
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  Speaker 2: you will wish that you had more time. But you
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  Speaker 2: can also marry the right person and wish you had
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  Speaker 2: more time. Because marriage is 70% what two right people
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  Speaker 2: do with themselves. Let me say this. Look up. Don't
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  Speaker 2: jot yet. Let's talk. Is that okay? Sometimes people are hungry. Alright?
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  Speaker 2: People are hungry. about their spouse, about this, about that.
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  Speaker 2: And some people have concluded that they married the wrong person. Meanwhile,
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  Speaker 2: they are the wrong person. Being a wrong person is
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  Speaker 2: not about your species, your flesh. A wrong mindset makes
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  Speaker 2: you a wrong person. Wrong training, wrong exposure makes you
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  Speaker 2: a wrong person. and I have said this in the
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  Speaker 2: loudest way I can that there are people you must
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  Speaker 2: not marry there are people that should not be married
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  Speaker 2: do you understand what I'm saying is it making sense
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  Speaker 2: to you no it doesn't have to make sense you
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  Speaker 2: just have to understand There are people that should not
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  Speaker 2: be married, not by anyone who is in God's plan.
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  Speaker 2: They are the harvest of wrong seeds, sown by wrong people,
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  Speaker 2: not exposed to God's help. And what a man sows,
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  Speaker 2: he should not reap. You can sow good stuffs in
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  Speaker 2: your life, but at that moment you fail to honor
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  Speaker 2: God's voice because of pressure. You will reap in another
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  Speaker 2: man's field, thorns and thistles. Terrible stuff. I'm going to
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  Speaker 2: come over again the things I showed you. I faced
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  Speaker 2: the female gender first. About practical things you need to
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  Speaker 2: put in place before you marry. What's the first thing
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  Speaker 2: I said? Number one, heal. Number two, learn submission. Number three,
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  Speaker 2: be financially independent. Number four, then basic homekeeping knowledge. Number five,
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  Speaker 2: So we're at number what? Number 6. Are you ready
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  Speaker 2: for number 6 now? Are you sure you're ready for
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  Speaker 2: number 6? Number 6, the 16. So I will start
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  Speaker 2: also from the ladies. Do you mind? Or should I
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  Speaker 2: start from the guys? I can start anywhere. The ladies, alright.
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  Speaker 2: You believe he who laughs last, laughs best. Now these
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  Speaker 2: are important things to have in place before you marry.
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  Speaker 2: Marriage is not an institution you run into... with little
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  Speaker 2: or no information, you prepare. And you cannot over-prepare for it.
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  Speaker 2: You cannot over-prepare for it. You cannot over-prepare for it.
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  Speaker 2: People's lives have been messed up because of who they marry.
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  Speaker 2: Somebody's been stabbed to death. Somebody is being suffocated emotionally
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  Speaker 2: because they are married people who have not been exposed
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  Speaker 2: to any form of training. You have any auntie or
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  Speaker 2: uncle somewhere that you know the wife, you know the spouses?
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  Speaker 2: And you are amazed any time you see them. You
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  Speaker 2: are wondering what they are doing to themselves. You wonder
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  Speaker 2: how people meet a girl beautiful looking with promising future.
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  Speaker 2: And few moments after they marry the girl, she start
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  Speaker 2: looking like her grandma. How you wonder? How you wonder?
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  Speaker 2: Why are good girls ending up in the hands of
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  Speaker 2: guys who are mentally retarded? Because the good girls want
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  Speaker 2: bad stuff. We have to call a spade a spade.
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  Speaker 2: They prefer the height, not the anointing. They prefer the look,
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  Speaker 2: not the content. They prefer the cash, not the sense.
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  Speaker 2: So you have rich fools. And yes, they are around.
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  Speaker 2: Even in religious environments. including church. Do you understand what
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  Speaker 2: I'm saying? I've told people, church is a spiritual clinic.
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  Speaker 2: Is that okay? Some patients have been discharged. They are
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  Speaker 2: still in church, but they are fine. Some are responding
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  Speaker 2: to treatment. They are growing fast. Some are not responding
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  Speaker 2: to treatment. And they are about to discharge themselves. And
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  Speaker 2: they will discharge themselves on somebody's son, on somebody's daughter.
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  Speaker 2: So you wonder, there's a case that happened years back.
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  Speaker 2: And by that I mean about seven years ago. Very,
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  Speaker 2: very powerful for me. in this country. We went to
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  Speaker 2: visit them, myself and a friend. And if you look
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  Speaker 2: at this girl, a picture hanging on the wall, she
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  Speaker 2: looked like an Indian woman. Now she's sitting in front
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  Speaker 2: of us. We cannot link the picture on the wall
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  Speaker 2: with what we have seen here. It looked like what
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  Speaker 2: we ordered versus what we got. And I was wondering,
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  Speaker 2: she's still young. As at then, their marriage was about
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  Speaker 2: three years old. And these are their wedding pictures online.
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  Speaker 2: This is not makeup. If somebody is fine, you're fine.
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  Speaker 2: If makeup should enhance anything, it's because you are naturally fine. Okay? Okay?
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  Speaker 2: So we're wondering, one of those days, the lady said,
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  Speaker 2: can I open up to you? I said, go ahead.
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  Speaker 2: She said, I'm dying. What's happening? I said, this guy,
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  Speaker 2: this guy, the guy won't sleep with her until he
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  Speaker 2: has faith. He will beat her to a pulp. When
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  Speaker 2: she is now helpless and powerless, that's when he enjoys sex.
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  Speaker 2: If that's not demonic, what is it? Say, I like
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  Speaker 2: some Jesus boy with a touch of Jerusalem. He will
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  Speaker 2: rule your world. And you know, marriage is such a
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  Speaker 2: place that you can be suffering and going through hell
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  Speaker 2: and still taking pictures. So how do you want to
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  Speaker 2: marry A person, just for what the person will look
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  Speaker 2: like in wedding gown and wedding suit. For what your
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  Speaker 2: friends will see. I like when we go out and
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  Speaker 2: hang out together. You know, one time I was in
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  Speaker 2: a relationship with a very beautiful girl. Thank God I
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  Speaker 2: married someone more beautiful. Beautiful. And this girl was so
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  Speaker 2: beautiful that when we go out to any tree, all
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  Speaker 2: heads will turn. All heads. And I like it. Everyone
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  Speaker 2: will turn. Tall, taller than a ham. Six feet. Some inches.
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  Speaker 2: But it's not in height. And it's not in figure eight.
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  Speaker 2: If you have this thing, you have it. If you don't,
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  Speaker 2: you don't. Do you understand what I'm saying? And one
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  Speaker 2: of the things that makes marriage so funny is that
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  Speaker 2: you get your certificate before you start. Everybody assumes that
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  Speaker 2: when two people come to the altar, they know what
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  Speaker 2: they are doing. We are not even expecting that the
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  Speaker 2: same wedding day should change you. We expected that you
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  Speaker 2: should come as a changed person. What changed? The change
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  Speaker 2: you did experience all your life. 30 minutes of preaching
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  Speaker 2: won't bring it. So there are many things, many things
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  Speaker 2: to consider. Say many things. Say it again, many things.
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  Speaker 2: Now I need to stress this point. The sixth thing
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  Speaker 2: that you need to put in place before you get married. Guys,
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  Speaker 2: watch out for this and the person you want to marry.
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  Speaker 2: Is that you need to learn the heart of peace. Peace.
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  Speaker 2: The heart of what? Say it again, the heart of peace.
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  Speaker 2: Say it again, the heart of peace. Say it again,
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  Speaker 2: the heart of peace. Now, the opposite of a peaceful
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  Speaker 2: woman is a contentious woman. That's the opposite. A contentious woman.
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  Speaker 2: When you don't have a peaceful woman, what you have
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  Speaker 2: is a contentious woman. And I'd like to tell the guys...
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  Speaker 2: That in all honesty, the hips won't matter for long.
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  Speaker 2: The pink lips won't matter for long. They are okay.
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  Speaker 2: The physique and all those things won't matter for long.
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  Speaker 2: At some point in your life, when reality is set in,
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  Speaker 2: you will need peace more than anything else. And do
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  Speaker 2: you know you can know a peaceful man before you
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  Speaker 2: marry her? You can know a peaceful woman before you
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  Speaker 2: marry her. Yes. You can know a peaceful woman. People
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  Speaker 2: believe some demonic stuff. Can I talk to you a bit?
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  Speaker 2: Some demonic stuff like women's head used to touch. Like
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  Speaker 2: a woman may not even know what's wrong with her.
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  Speaker 2: You just want to cause trouble. Have you seen things
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  Speaker 2: like that? It's demonic. It's not true. That's not your nature.
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  Speaker 2: You are not your temperament. Temperaments are real, but you
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  Speaker 2: are spirit-controlled. Now, when I'm having my menstrual flow, I
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  Speaker 2: just get angry. I get provoked. I can't talk anyhow.
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  Speaker 2: You should know that the way I woke up this morning,
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  Speaker 2: that something is happening. So, I'm not... Shut up. Deborah
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  Speaker 2: had menstrual flow in the Bible. It didn't begin with you.
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  Speaker 2: Esther had menstrual flow. Now, you are quiet. It looks like, Pastor,
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  Speaker 2: you are not understanding what we women go through. I said,
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  Speaker 2: Esther had menstrual flow in the Bible. And she was
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  Speaker 2: married to a king. She honored him. Talk to me now.
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  Speaker 2: She honored him. I never saw anywhere in the Bible
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  Speaker 2: any woman complain that I'm hungry because I'm having menstrual flu.
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  Speaker 2: You are simply not a peaceful person. Period. You like wahala.
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  Speaker 2: Just like trouble. Your mood is not you. You have
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  Speaker 2: the Holy Ghost to rebuke. And I'm saying this. Listen, listen.
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  Speaker 2: Because lack of peace in the home is a master
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  Speaker 2: key in the hands of the devil. It will come
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  Speaker 2: with destruction, hunger and pain just every moment you are
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  Speaker 2: at the edge of your breakthrough. Once the devil can
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  Speaker 2: establish that he can take peace away from your consciousness,
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  Speaker 2: every time you should break into a new phase, it
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  Speaker 2: will come. You will disagree and you will scatter the
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  Speaker 2: old thing. Then it will go again As a woman. Masterpiece.
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  Speaker 2: Now one of the description. Can you please show me
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  Speaker 2: the scripture. Proverbs 31. Of the Proverbs 31 woman. Is
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  Speaker 2: that she will do her husband good. All his days.
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  Speaker 2: Now we need more ladies who are wired for that.
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  Speaker 2: Whose consciousness is. I will do him good. I will
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  Speaker 2: make you happy. Ladies, do you mind? Can I ask
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  Speaker 2: you to please stand? Raise your right hand and say,
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  Speaker 2: I will do my spouse good all these days. Mark
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  Speaker 2: those who are not saying this and avoid them. Say,
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  Speaker 2: I will do my spouse good all these days. I
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  Speaker 2: will not stress him. I will not make his life difficult.
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  Speaker 2: I will be a peaceful woman. By his side, I
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  Speaker 2: will be a supportive wife. Now, those of you who
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  Speaker 2: are married, hold your husband. Get close to your husband.
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  Speaker 2: Is it long-distance marriage? You want to rub his head
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  Speaker 2: a bit? I will do you good. That's not how
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  Speaker 2: to rub the head. You'll be golden. You'll rub the head.
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  Speaker 2: I will do you good all my days. Come on,
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  Speaker 2: say it again. Do you enjoy being there? And when
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  Speaker 2: a man wakes up every morning and the woman knows
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  Speaker 2: how to treat him like a king, he goes out
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  Speaker 2: and excels. The reason why some men are struggling out
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  Speaker 2: there is because their wives have killed them at home. Contentious, rude, arrogant, despising.
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  Speaker 2: Everyone knows what he carries except the wife. Do you
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  Speaker 2: know one of the reasons why I function so well?
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  Speaker 2: Because no one actually have a better revelation of me
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  Speaker 2: than my wife. That's the truth. After many services, we'll
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  Speaker 2: come to the house, to the room, and she will
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  Speaker 2: kneel down and say, I've been pursuing what you carry.
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  Speaker 2: Lay hands on me. I want to do this also.
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  Speaker 2: I look at her and she brings me seed. I said, what?
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  Speaker 2: When you have a woman like that, you do well.
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  Speaker 2: That's the truth. Maybe if my wife is a rude woman,
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  Speaker 2: I'm not just going to talk about peace. I'm just
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  Speaker 2: going to avoid it. Make sure you treat your spouse
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  Speaker 2: in such a way that he can't think of your replacement.
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  Speaker 2: They may look finer than you, but they can't beat
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  Speaker 2: what you bring to the table. Peace. You create an
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  Speaker 2: atmosphere where it can blossom. Please be scared as queens.
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  Speaker 2: Now let me show you a few scriptures. Are you
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  Speaker 2: ready for me? Now look at it. I love this.
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  Speaker 2: Proverbs 31 said, She will do him good and not what? Evil.
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  Speaker 2: She will do him what? Good and not evil. So
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  Speaker 2: it means there are women that do their spouses evil.
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  Speaker 2: True or not true? Do wickedness. There are women that
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  Speaker 2: talk down their spouses before family and friends. One of
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  Speaker 2: the worst things you can do to your spouse is
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  Speaker 2: embarrassing the person. You are not to conquer your spouse.
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  Speaker 2: You are not to bring your spouse to your level.
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  Speaker 2: You are to ascend to where the scriptures say you
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  Speaker 2: should be. How often do you have peace? When this
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  Speaker 2: one says one, that one has replied with ten. I
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  Speaker 2: bet unless something is done, their home may not be
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  Speaker 2: any better. That's the truth. Sometimes when I come out
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  Speaker 2: and travel, I have trips, and people just put my
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  Speaker 2: pictures everywhere and say, Apostle, Oh you are a blessing.
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  Speaker 2: I am. Because someone is between. That's the truth. Let
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  Speaker 2: me say this to you. If you have not mastered
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  Speaker 2: the heart of peace. God can. With his sons. That
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  Speaker 2: matters in his agenda. Or he gives you one. And
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  Speaker 2: you destroy the agenda. Say it loud and clear. I
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  Speaker 2: will not destroy my husband. I will not destroy my husband.
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  Speaker 2: Now ladies, you are quiet now. You are quiet, don't you?
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  Speaker 2: Come on, shout it the way you would have shouted.
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  Speaker 2: I will give him peace all his days. Do you
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  Speaker 2: know that food is only interesting if you are a
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  Speaker 2: woman of honor? There are men who no longer eat
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  Speaker 2: their wife's food. Because the attitude stinks. Look at what
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  Speaker 2: the Bible says in Proverbs 21 verse 19. We read
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  Speaker 2: this in three translations. We read this in King James.
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  Speaker 2: Then we read in Amplified. Then we read in Message.
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  Speaker 2: You need to see it in those translations. Are you ready?
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  Speaker 2: Proverbs 21 verse 19. Please give it to me. It
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  Speaker 2: is better to dwell in the wilderness than with a
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  Speaker 2: contentious woman. That is, it is better not to have
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  Speaker 2: a house over your head than to live with a
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  Speaker 2: woman who is contentious. I'm going to show you what
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  Speaker 2: it means to be contentious. But give me an amplified translation.
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  Speaker 2: It is better to dwell in a desert, in a
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  Speaker 2: desert land, than with a contentious woman with vexation. One
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  Speaker 2: that you cannot have the hand of God sustained on
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  Speaker 2: your head for long because she will vex your spirit.
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  Speaker 2: True attitude, true words, true the things she's doing. Do
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  Speaker 2: you know women's attitude can take peace from the atmosphere?
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  Speaker 2: Just pass peace. Can I talk to the guys? Don't
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  Speaker 2: marry a woman who doesn't respect you. Anytime there's an argument,
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  Speaker 2: she compares you quickly. That's not your wife. Let her
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  Speaker 2: marry the person she's comparing you with. You are a king.
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  Speaker 2: You are not to be managed. Once you discover... This
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  Speaker 2: person doesn't honor you and you have said it several
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  Speaker 2: times but the person won't change. Break it. It is better.
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  Speaker 2: Don't marry a devil. And I have to be frank
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  Speaker 2: with you. Can you give us this now in message translation?
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  Speaker 2: Now look at it. Better to live in a tent
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  Speaker 2: in the wild than with a cross and petulant spouse.
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  Speaker 2: Somebody who has no, they have no tendency for peace.
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  Speaker 2: Fight with the husband. Fight with those who are close
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  Speaker 2: to the husband. Fight with the in-laws. Fight with every guest.
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  Speaker 2: With attitude. There are families you don't like to greet.
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: Because the attitude stinks. It stinks. They have no idea.
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: They don't know how to entertain guests. Do you know
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: how to treat visitors? Do you know how to cook?
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: Do you know how to present it? What your husband likes,
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: does it matter to you? You've married someone who is
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: very hospitable. But you are from a place where your
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: minds are so narrow. When people come to your house,
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: you feel they are coming to eat your food. And
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: you want to do things that will make them go quickly.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: That's poverty. It's wrong mindset. There are families you should
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: not greet on Christmas day. They will serve you food
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: but the attitude has taken away your appetite. As if
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: chicken is all there is to life. And they miss
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: their benefactors. Because they are not wise. She is not wise.
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: There are women that when you marry they will strip
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: you of all good relationships. Complain about your friends Those
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: who have met decades before you met her You know
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: one of the ways you know you have married the
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: right person Is that your life is not restarting If
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: you have to troubleshoot your life And restart it Then
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: something is dead The right person will come as a
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: perpetual continuum You have to cut off your relationships You
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: have to cut off this You have to cut off
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: that There are places I vowed never to step. Because, yeah,
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: it's wrong. I live in my own house like a king.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: Don't get treated anyhow. Do you know what peace is?
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: Have you developed the capacity for it? When we come
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: to your home, beyond the smiles, what is the atmosphere like?
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: The woman is a home builder. What are you building
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: your home to be like? What environment are you giving
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: your children? What is your plan? You want to win
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: an argument and lose your home? Sometimes to have peace
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: will mean to keep quiet and talk some other time.
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: Two people can be angry at the same time. He's
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: on the edge. I'll wait. I'll wait. Some husbands and
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: wives are like bulls. We don't know who unleashed them.
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: I grew up in a setting where I saw in
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: our environment, husband will beat the wife and strip her naked.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: One time a man threw the load of his wife
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: from two building stories. And he used a stick to
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: bring out her panties. And said, see your panties. Before everyone.
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: And you wonder why the children are growing up with
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: so much dysfunctionality. Do you know that coming from a
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: home where there's no peace is not a yardstick for
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: you to repeat the same pattern? Because you can actually unlearn?
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: You notice when you sit down by yourself, you're just angry.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: That's the spirit. That's the spirit. Are you aware there's
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: a way to talk to your spouse? Are you aware
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: it's not good to shout on your spouse? It's not good.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: There are women who will even go as far as
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: using F-words to let you know what's deep inside. In fact,
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: there are women who beat their spouses. They will beat
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: you up. I saw a picture somewhere A very small
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: looking man and a very big woman. And they said,
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: he has never laid his hands on his wife for
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: 20 something years. Why will he? All she has to
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: do is to use one leg and pin him to
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: the wall and he's done. Every time you guys are
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: talking in your relationship, you shout on each other at
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: the end of the phone. Bang the call on each other.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: call yourselves names and you think anything will change in
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: marriage it's not going to change now you just in
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: place in the cage and you can look at each
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: other and now talk to each other are you a
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: peaceful woman come on ask your neighbor again are you
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: a woman ladies why are you quiet we agreed ask
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: your neighbor are you a peaceful woman? Let me say
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: this to you. You can't sow tears and expect to
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: reap wheat. Listen, listen. Check your investment. Who are you
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: learning from? There are women who are learning From social media.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: Who are learning from Nollywood. You want to marry a girl.
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: Every time you meet her. She's always watching one. Yoruba
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: film or the other. One Nigerian film or the other. Nollywood.
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: On the phone. She doesn't even have a good phone.
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: But she will still find a way to smuggle them inside.
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: And you ask her, do you have this message? She said, well,
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: I had to delete it to create space for more
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: Nollywood movies. When this celebrity is fighting this one online,
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: you'll see she has gotten there and she has liked it.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: She will follow the old gist. And sometimes when she's
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: talking by this side, she's giving you one giant warning.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: She's giving you some jab, go more. The way she thinks.
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: You watch when she talks, the way she talks. You
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: know that as if feminism is deeply rooted here. And
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: you say that I just love her. Love has common sense.
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: Love is not stupid. It's simple. You have a promising future.
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: Don't marry the person that will kill it Sometimes with
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: pain and tears, you have to let some people go.
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: Because we will do wrong things to ourselves. Can I
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: show you one more scripture? Proverbs 27 verse 15. Proverbs
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: 27 verse 15. A continual dropping in a very rainy
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: day and a contentious woman are alike. Keep it in
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: another translation. Have you been in a case whereby rain,
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: you are somewhere, unfortunately you could not hide yourself and
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: rain was just dropping on your head. You were hungry,
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: you can't stop. A continual dripping on a day of
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: violent showers and a contentious woman are alike. It's a
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: rain that won't stop falling on your head. And once
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: the devil can plant someone like that in your home,
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: you'll be finished from inside out. You don't have to
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: judge people by the kind of background they are coming from.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: Provided they have taken responsibility to change and learn differently.
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: But if they don't learn differently, judge them by their background.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: And that's a very strong word. Can I come again
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: to what I said? It's a very strong word. Don't
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: judge people because they are coming from a dysfunctional background. No.
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: Check them for who they are. But when you observe
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: for a while and you discover that there's no difference
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: between them and that background, make up your mind and leave.
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: And one of the ways to repeat the pains of
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: your background is to live in unforgiveness. Anyone you fail
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: to forgive a parent, that's the one you will become like.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: And your children will have to now hate you for
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: the very same thing you hate them for. Number seven.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: Are you still with me, Spirit of Light Church? Or
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: should I reduce my mic? Okay. Number seven. Things to
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: put in place before you get married as a woman.
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: Learn management. Management. Learn to be a manager. The nature
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: of a woman really is that she's supposed to be
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: a multiplier. One who receives, incubates, and gives you multiple folds.
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: That's the ideal nature. She's a womb man. You give
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: her a seed, she gives you children. That's her nature. So,
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: a woman comes to the life of a man and
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: helps him to be better planned. That's if she knows
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: planning herself. Don't be a squanderer. Don't live above your means.
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: You know, in Abuja, there are people that live above
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: their means. It's a very, very creaky city. Some of
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: them can be wearing t-shirts and controlling billions. One time,
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: I took my wife to go and eat somewhere. And
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: when we were done eating, I said, yeah, give us
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: the bill. And they brought the bill It was one
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: hundred and something thousand. I said, okay. Excuse me, what
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: did we eat again? Because it's not just about the money.
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: The fact that you have it doesn't mean you waste it.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: That's what management tells you. He said, you had this.
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: I didn't even finish it. My wife just said, babe, babe,
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: we're not coming here again. We know some women will
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: tell their husband, that place where you waste your salary
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: is where you should take me to. It's low self-esteem.
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: Dear ladies, do you know how to grow wealth? What
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: do you know about money? They say, women love to
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: chop money. Okay, it's no problem, but do you know
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: how to make it? Do you know how to manage it?
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: Unless you are preparing to marry a yahoo boy. Then
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: you don't need management. Just do some things and keep
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: getting more money. Till they use your head for ritual.
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: Show us Proverbs 31 again. Start reading from verse 5.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: Let's look at it. Proverbs 31. Let's start from verse 5. And.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: Dear young man. That is pretending. Every time you take
• 36:58
  Speaker 2: her out. She takes all the good stuff. You drink
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: bottled water. And say, I don't have appetite. You spend
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: your one month salary because you want to prove a point. Mister,
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: no appetite. Is that the person you really want to marry?
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: And the strange girl too is not sensitive to know
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: and read his body language. She always forgets her ATM
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: at home. And she's eating stops. You call her for
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: a dinner. She's inviting her roommate and the friend of
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: the roommate. And you wonder. You wonder. What kind of
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: mentality is that? One time I was somewhere in Lekki.
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: And I saw a very nice gown. I was going
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: to get the gown for my wife. How much was
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: that gown again? No, it was 290 something thousand. It
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: was 290 something thousand. So I said, what's special about it?
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: I said, well, what's special about it is the fact
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: that when your wife wears this, she's going to be
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: the only person in the world who's wearing this fabric.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: This is something limited. So the fabrics here, you don't
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: see them on anyone else. If you see the likes
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: of Joker Silva, the likes of this, the likes of that,
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: I said, when we get there, we will wear it.
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: So I called my wife and said, you know what
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: I saw today? I was going to surprise you, but
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: this is it. My wife said, you better let me
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: leave that. Do you know a wise woman can even
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: say that? Give me the money. And she put it
• 38:53
  Speaker 2: in her business and make much more. And she can
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: do many things for herself. Sorry to be a bit strong.
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: Can I touch it a bit? You want to impress
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: with the money you are not making. What kind of
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: life is that? You want to be among the class
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: of your friends who are making their own money. Make
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: yours too. Learn to be a good manager. We just
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: have to face this matter as they are. If there
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: was a better way, I would have tried. And I'm
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: not someone who would like to speak things in red
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: and sugar-coated. I just have to tell you the way
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: it is. Proverbs 31, please. Let me jump a bit
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: to verse 10. Proverbs 31 from verse 10 says, Who
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: can find a virtuous woman? Her price is far above
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: her obese. The heart of her husband does safely trust
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: in her that she shall have no need of spoil.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: She will do him good and not evil all the
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: days of her life. She seeketh wool and flax and
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: worketh willingly with her hands. She is like a merchant's sheep.
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: She brings her food from afar. She rises also while
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: it is yet night and gives meat to her household
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: and portion to her maidens. You see that now. She
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: considereth a field and you can... Go on and on
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: and on and on. I mean, there are so many
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: things about the proactive woman. She's a manager of wealth
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: and resources. Any man that marries her will get better
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: in his finance. She will help him plan, help him think.
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: She cut off the excesses and show them what is necessary.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: She's not trying to prove a point to her friends
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: and colleagues. She wants to be fine. She's not a waster.
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: Food is not wasting, throwing things everywhere. She's a manager.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: She's prudent. That's the kind of woman you should be.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: She studied about many things. And I want to say this.
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: There are so many issues of low self-esteem in marriage.
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: People using the money don't have to impress people who
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: don't like them. You want to buy a kind of clothes,
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: not for yourself, but so that so-and-so can see it
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: and you have made a statement. It's the wrong way
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: to live life. You'll be poor. Ideally, you should be
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: richer than you look. But if you look more than
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: your personal treasury, then you are broke. It's a wrong
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: way to live life. Have I taught you something? Tell
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: your neighbor, be a good manager. Then be a good advisor.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: Because part of good management is good advice. She knows what...
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: Do you understand what I'm saying? Be a woman who
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: is deep, who is broad. Who is well read. Who
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: has studied about different things. Who can speak into any subject.
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: As touching your spouse. You can think together. It's not
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: every time whatsoever you say I follow. No. You have brains.
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: Part of what he paid for in the dowry was
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: the brain. Bring it to the table. Sorry I have
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: to say it. Bring it to the table. One should
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: chase a thousand. Two should chase ten thousand. But since
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: the day he married you. He's chasing less than five hundred.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: What changed? What changed? What advice are you bringing to
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: the table? And men, if you want to live long
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: and do well, learn to confide in your wife. How
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: dare you have another best friend apart from your wife?
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: Because many women could have helped their spouse, but the
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: guy will never talk. Am I making sense to you?
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: Are you learning something? Are you sure? Number eight. I'm
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: going to touch this a bit more. Have a good
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: understanding of how to take care of children. Now, look up.
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: Are you aware you're going to have children, dear lady?
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: Talk to me now. Are you aware? Are you aware?
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: Whose child have you ever taken care of before? And
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: how did you do it? I can't change diapers. I
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: just fix my nails. Oh, I can't do the dirty stuff.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: We should actually not be talking about marriage for now.
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: Talk about internship. With a company that will get you
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: very busy. Because when you get married, are you aware
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: there are women that will keep you waiting for years?
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: I can't lose my shape now. I don't want children
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: to disfigure my shape And that's not the reality of
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: anybody who is waiting. And it's not of my business
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: to talk into people's personal affairs. I should just show
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: you scriptures because I know my jurisdiction. So, people say
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: all those things. Can I speak from a medical standpoint? People,
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: I see one, I'm careful. Do all those things. I
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: don't want to lose my shape. Especially if I'm on
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: that matter. I don't want any child to come and
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: make me lose my shape. And one day that child
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: will call you mommy. And you say I'm a proud mother.
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: Don't let me go into the medical part. Of things
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: we do to ourselves. Sometimes I look at people in church.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: They say, hey, can you help change these child diapers? Ew! Ew!
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: I don't really like children. It's lack of training. Abiy,
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: it's lack of what? Training. You see women... That their
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: children will go to school, their nose is blocked everywhere.
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: Sunday evening, they will remember they have not washed their uniform.
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: They have transferred the dirtiness into the child. The child
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: wears the same clothes to school throughout the week. Smells.
• 45:33
  Speaker 2: The mate already ostracizing him. The young boy is confused.
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: Why do they hate me? Because you have a dirty mother.
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: Who would rather be busy watching Netflix? Women who would
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: know nothing about their child's homework. A mother is supposed
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: to be there by the side, nurturing the child. But
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: there is a busy one, a bee babe. It's busy.
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: If some children should know the evil their parents have done,
• 46:00
  Speaker 2: or their mothers have done to them, they will struggle
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: forgiving them. Sometimes what we call love is wickedness on
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: the child. You put a child in front of TV
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: to watch from morning till night. It's affecting the child's
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: mental construction. Are you aware children can become autistic for screen?
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: Start showing some tendencies. You don't know what the child,
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: the child eat junk and chemical foods at that age.
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: The child looks malnourished, not taken care of. Every time,
• 46:48
  Speaker 2: biscuit and ice cream. Every time, biscuit and ice cream.
• 46:51
  Speaker 2: The child goes to school, sees other children. A teacher
• 46:56
  Speaker 2: is touching your child in the wrong way in school.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: You have no idea because you are busy. Busy. Busy
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: doing what we don't understand. Some mothers are so funny,
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: their child will offend them. They will say, come. I
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: want to talk to you. And slap the child. Slap
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: the child. Are you aware each time you do that
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: you kill trust? It is actually some mothers who are
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: abusing their own children with their lack of attention to details.
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: You knew what you went through as a woman but
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: now you are passing your own daughter through the same hell.
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: Why are we like that? Why are we like that? Why? Why?
• 47:50
  Speaker 2: Because you want to be busy doing what? When you
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: get married and you start giving child, giving back to children,
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: it's actually a moment of sacrifice. When children start coming,
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: they will actually, your life will change forever. There are
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: many things you will not be able to keep up
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: with because the child is coming. It's the reality of
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: being a woman. And we honor you for that. But
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: we have to deal with the reality. Your life is
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: not ending. It's just changing. I've seen cases where some
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: women would have to withdraw and walk from home. It's
• 48:27
  Speaker 2: the sacrifice. It's the reality of being married. What were
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: you thinking? That it's just about sex? When you have sex,
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: you make babies. And should you keep inhibiting it because
• 48:45
  Speaker 2: you want to maintain your shape, you give your body
• 48:48
  Speaker 2: a permanent signal that when you stop it, your body
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: does not respond. That's what I didn't want to tell you.
• 48:59
  Speaker 2: Somebody's daughter has been molested by a teacher in school.
• 49:03
  Speaker 2: Do you know how to look at your child and
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: know something is wrong? Do you know how to pay
• 49:07
  Speaker 2: attention to details? Do you ask your child about the
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: mark on her body, on his body? Who did this
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: to you? Before traveling down this street, was playing with
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: my daughter. And usually, just play and play. That day,
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: it was extra. What is going on? I looked at her. Hey,
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: there's a new guy in your class who watches wrestling.
• 49:36
  Speaker 2: I said, my wife, we need to find out. There's
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: a new guy So my almost two year old daughter
• 49:42
  Speaker 2: Grew my hands and said come and sit down So
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: I wanted to sit down Then she wanted to remove
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: the chair Hey somebody is doing this in your class
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: Who is doing that We pay attention to all that
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: Because it is important They are children I mean that's
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: just being a child But obviously you know somebody is
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: doing that in the class When we all gather to
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: pray She sees everybody knees down She herself go on
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: her knees And her amen is loud. Amen. Amen. She
• 50:12
  Speaker 2: doesn't know what we're saying, but that's what she's seeing.
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: You know some mothers destroy their own children by telling
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: the child what is going on between them and their father.
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: It doesn't need this information. You are destroying the person's future.
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: Because he will have safeguard for what is not coming.
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: And that fear will create the exact same problem. Some women,
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: some girls now need recovery because of what their mothers
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: told them. Not for what they saw. See, when you
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: are going through something with your husband, have a voice
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: over you. Your children can't be that voice. And you too,
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: learn it now. Because when you do that, out of
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: that fear, you make their lives miserable. Number nine, have
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: good relationship skills. Have good relationship skills. Learn to relate.
• 51:05
  Speaker 2: Learn to relate. Your spouse, the friends, the pastors, the
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: relationships around your life. Don't throw away your own relationship
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: because you are married. Learn how to put people in
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: their own places. Learn to relate. Even with your spouse,
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: learn to relate. Learn to know when to say what.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: It's not every time like bull. Calm down. He must
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: listen because I want to talk. You won't build your home.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: You will scatter it. I must say everything is in
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: my mind now. Marriage can only work in the hands
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: of fools. When you have too much sense, you destroy it.
• 51:51
  Speaker 2: But many times you have to choose to be a
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: fool and ignore some things for the sake of peace
• 51:58
  Speaker 2: and later come back to deal with them. That's how
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: a wise woman builds a house. And every man who
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: has conscience and has married a wise woman knows that
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: there are things that this woman would like to tell me.
• 52:18
  Speaker 2: And when you begin to sense that, create an atmosphere.
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: The pillow talk where she can say what she wants
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: to say. Men don't like to hear, I want to
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: talk to you. Women, you are powerful. You must know
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: the power. And your power is only potent when you
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: wield it with peace and love and tenderness. You are
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: not another man. When you come at him as another man,
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: he comes at you with confrontation. When you come towards
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: him as his queen, he defends you. It is not general,
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: provided you marry the one that has sense. No, we
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: have to say it. Two plus two is equal to four,
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: if the conditions are right. Learn good relationship skills with
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: your spouse, with your in-laws. Naturally, God is blessing you.
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: Everybody sees you as a problem. So learn to manage
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: them gently. Every time you go for family function, you
• 53:30
  Speaker 2: come back, you fought one in-law or the other. She's
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: looking at me bad eye. You two take away your eyes.
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: You came there with your husband. Face him. Elkanah told Hannah.
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: Am I not more than 10,000 children to you? Face
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: me now. Is somebody learning? Are you sure? Are you sure?
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: Let me touch a bit on the guys. Number one
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: thing I told you as a man is what? To heal.
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: And I stress the importance of healing. Number two, what?
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: Be financially mature. Number three, be emotionally mature. A mommy's
• 54:25
  Speaker 2: boy is not an emotionally mature guy. There are homes
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: that it is the mother-in-law that they take when the
• 54:33
  Speaker 2: guy sleeps with the wife. My mommy, my mommy. Remaining small,
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: he would have been drinking fida. Small. When he wants
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: to buy his wife's shoe, he checks with the mommy.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: Do you like it, mommy? Don't marry a mummy's boy.
• 55:03
  Speaker 2: The earth does not qualify a male as a man.
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: It doesn't. Oh, sorry. There are male men and there
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: are male women. It's male whatever it is. Not a mafrodite,
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: but it says something. It's more a meaning. It'll have
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: been by a menstrual part. Behaves like a woman, thinks
• 55:29
  Speaker 2: like them, narrow-minded, petty, Say you grew up in the
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: midst of sisters. In your hostel, there are sisters there too.
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: I wanted to actually explain the concept of what I
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: call the neutral man. But it's a very tricky one.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: There are neutral men. They are like handbags. They are
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: like handbags. In fact, women can call them to come
• 56:06
  Speaker 2: and stay in their hostels conveniently. They know he's one
• 56:08
  Speaker 2: of them. Highly neutral. They've seen that there's no spine,
• 56:17
  Speaker 2: no masculinity in him. He's not a threat. He can
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: use female toilet conveniently. Say, oh, well done. He's one
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: of us. Sorry, guys. I mean, it's not you, so
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: why should you be sorry? Somebody say, exactly. Are we good?
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: Are we good? Have you seen guys that they invite
• 56:48
  Speaker 2: for bridal shower? Like, it's so neutral. The way he walks,
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: the way he talks, everything. Whatsoever spirit that is breaking
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: the testicles of the men, that spirit is arrested. We
• 57:07
  Speaker 2: have men who don't have spines. As a woman, don't
• 57:13
  Speaker 2: conquer your man. What you get when you do so
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: is a woman. So number five, I said you should
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: get purpose, right? Number four, I said you should understand
• 57:23
  Speaker 2: the female species, right? And I said there are men
• 57:26
  Speaker 2: who are marrying a gender they don't know. A gender
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: they don't understand. They relate with the woman as though
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: they are relating with another man. If you know what
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: I'm thinking, it's already in my mind. I wanted to
• 57:42
  Speaker 2: do it. Women don't understand what is in your mind.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: They know what you say. Compliment her. Say, you look good. Nonsense.
• 57:53
  Speaker 2: Anybody on the street can say she looks good. What
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: can you say that is different? Are you aware that
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: part of being a man is to learn how to
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: talk nicely? Say, whenever I'm under the anointing, I don't
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: really say some kind of... What are you talking about?
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: I saw one video online. Somebody was explaining that the
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: reason why some men of God's marriage is not working
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: is because their anointing is so much something. Nonsense. And
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: that person said that... Can't marry a woman Who is
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: emotional How many angels are you talking to God planted
• 58:35
  Speaker 2: an angel beside you You are looking for one angel
• 58:38
  Speaker 2: What's your problem Number six The sixth thing you must
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: have Before you Marry Have eyes that sees. And I'm
• 59:01
  Speaker 2: going to do it here. Have eyes that what? Sees.
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: Tell your neighbor, the man beside you, can you see?
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: Louder guys. Can you see? Ask him, what do you see?
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: Ask him, what do you see? Are you seeing? Now,
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: how many of you can agree with me that many
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: men have never seen their spouses before? Never. Listen, listen.
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: The Bible has shown us that the heart, the mind,
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: has the capacity of being blinded. Sometimes Paul speaks to
• 59:36
  Speaker 2: the Corinthians and says, some people of whom the God
• 59:38
  Speaker 2: of this world has blinded their heart. Speaks with him,
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: he said that the highest of your understanding may be enlightened.
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: The highest need to be enlightened. You need enlightenment. God
• 59:53
  Speaker 2: asking Jeremiah, he said, what do you see? Jesus healed
• 59:58
  Speaker 2: that guy. He said, go and wash your face. He
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 2: washed it the first time. He said, I'm seeing men
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 2: like trees. The reason why some men don't touch their spouse,
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: don't relate to their spouse, don't kiss their spouse, don't
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: hug their spouse, don't hold their spouse, is because they
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 2: have never seen their spouse. The girl is actually more
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 2: beautiful than every other person she's looking at. And when
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: you marry a man who is not seeing you, He
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 2: will cheat. You are not looking at what is right
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: in front of you. Can you see? Because it looks
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 2: like seeing the person's hands when you say I do.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 2: It is a very important thing. Can you see? Have
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: you seen your wife of late? Whose picture do you
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: stare at? Whose social media have you been stalking? Who
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 2: is entering your eyes? Who is entering your mind? Who
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 2: are you comparing her with? Have you seen what God
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 2: gave you? Have you looked at her again? Can you
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 2: see the person you ignore every night on the bed?
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: Because the devil gives you an impression that what you
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 2: don't have is better than what you have. And James
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 2: called it superfluity of naughtiness. It's a well you keep
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 2: digging and not touch water. When you begin to go
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: the route of sexual immorality, you may never come back.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 2: I've seen men with beautiful wives going to chase after
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: something else. You put this person side by side with
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: the wife, you wonder, is something wrong with me? What's
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 2: wrong with your mind? Are you aware when you are
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 2: having strange chat with some strange girls and you delete it,
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 2: you are exposing your home? Who are you confiding in
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: as touching your sexual life in your marriage? Which girl?
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: Because you may come to church and look like all
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 2: is well. and someone is dying. Oh, you are back,
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 2: talking with your ex. How is she doing? She's telling
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 2: you what she ate. And every time you post your
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: white picture, so you pick this one over me, right?
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: And soon you are planning to meet up somewhere and
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 2: have lunch. Nothing special, just lunch. And we do these
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: things to ourselves because Eve in Genesis 3 looked at
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: the fruit and she said to herself, this is a
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: fruit that one should desire to make one wise. It
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: is good to the eyes. And she took of it
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 2: and ate. But in that same garden there was a
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: tree of life. You have the tree of life in
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: your garden. Don't go after the tree of knowledge of
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: good and evil. Can you see it? Are you still
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: seeing her? You say she has changed since she gave birth.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: Who got her pregnant? Whose child did she give birth to?
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: Your child. And when she's pregnant and her body is changing,
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 2: you can't compliment her When your wife is pregnant, you
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 2: are where she throws up. Can you clean it? The
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: day you were marrying that girl, her father held her hands.
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: Please come. Her father held her hands. The father, please come,
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 2: come like this. When a man, when a woman is
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: getting married, the father of the girl holds the hand
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: and walk her down the aisle. Please stand. Like you
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: did that day. And there are ways this is done.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: The father sometimes hands the girl to the pastor and
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 2: the pastor hands the girl to the husband. Never to
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 2: be handed again to another man. That's the reality. That's
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 2: what you are doing when you are getting married. So,
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 2: can you see what is being handed over to you
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: or just when you get her you move on and
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: start looking for something else one of the things you
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: must check in a man before you agree to marry
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 2: him is to ask him can you see me this
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 2: is what I look like this is the size of
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 2: my hips this is the size of the breast there
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 2: is no assurance it is going to get bigger There's
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 2: no assurance. Do you like what you see? Or you
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 2: are a scavenger who wants to pick more things? I
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 2: am okay the way I am, just in case. I
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 2: am not your type. I am God's type. Somebody's prayer point.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 2: Somebody's blessing. And somebody's queen. There is no woman in
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 2: this world Who does not carry what it takes to
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 2: make the most powerful man kneel to ask for a
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 2: hand in marriage? It depends on the confidence with which
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 2: you weigh it. And never you dare think that any
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 2: man is doing you a favor for marrying you. Nonsense.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: He's doing himself a favor. Something happened one time. A
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: woman and her husband drove to a petrol station in
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: their Jeep to buy fuel And she saw her ex
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: and told the guy, can you imagine, that's my ex.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: The guy laughed. I said, you better thank God you
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 2: married me. If not, you would have been the wife
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 2: of a petrol attendant. And the woman said, no. If
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 2: I had married him, you would be the one by
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 2: this time. That's a queen and more. That's a queen
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 2: and more. so check the person you are giving the
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 2: yes can he see can you see what is right
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 2: in front of you let me be honest with you
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 2: let me be very honest with you when I was
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 2: going to marry my wife I saw her one time
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 2: I went to her home church and I saw them
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 2: wearing berets, and I've spoken against berets all my life,
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 2: almost a campaigner against it, but I mean, who cares?
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 2: If it's good on you, it's good on you. Okay?
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 2: It looks good. Once he likes it, who cares what
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: anybody thinks? Yeah. You wear it with beauty, dignity, and splendor. Okay? Good.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: But I, I've spoken against it a couple of times,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 2: but there I was, been invited to preach in their church,
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 2: and I was looking at my wife in their midst.
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 2: I said to myself, if you guys know who is
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: sitting here, I know what I saw. And it's clear.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 2: It's obvious. When God made Eve to pass before Adam,
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 2: the first thing he did was to see her. And
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 2: you have to keep seeing her all her days. A
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: woman is going to have many seasons. You must see
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 2: the princess you married, even when those seasons are changing.
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 2: When her stomach is so big and she's walking like this,
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: see the princess you married. I told my wife during pregnancy.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 2: She was pregnant with her daughter. And I said to her,
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 2: you are even finer pregnant. Beautiful. Flawless. I see her.
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 2: And when you see your spouse, you can't see no
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 2: one else. Because one thing about the law of focus
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 2: is that when your eyes is open to one, it's
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 2: blind to others. When you can see other things, it
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: means you are blind to the one God gave you.
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 2: Number six, do what? Have eyes that sees. Number seven,
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 2: learn leadership before you mind. Leadership. Now, John C. Maxwell
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 2: said the popular statement that everything rises and falls on leadership.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: Have you heard that before? Good. So what that simply
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: means is that what becomes of a person or a
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 2: people is a function of the quality of leadership they
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 2: are under. The book Spirit of Leadership by The first
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: statement in that book is a group of sheep led
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 2: by a lion will defeat a group of lions led
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 2: by a sheep. What the wife, the children become is
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: a function of who is in front. Is it a
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 2: sheep or a lion? If the man prays, they will pray.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 2: If he has integrity, they will have integrity. You don't
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 2: just make decisions because you are married to a person
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: You must understand that marriage is stewardship. You are not
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 2: the owner. It's stewardship. It's a sacred privilege God has
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 2: given to you to lead His child. You can't compel
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 2: her anywhere. You can't just make her do anything. You
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 2: hear from God. You hear from God. The mirror, the
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 2: picture of what marriage should look like is the relation
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 2: between Christ and the church. And Jesus said, I cannot
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 2: of my own self do nothing. You can't just make
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 2: decisions like that. We are not saying she is not submissive.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 2: But you are hurting her. You are hurting God's plan.
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 2: You drag her out of her purpose. You drag her
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 2: out because of insecurity. You cut her off every relationship.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 2: You make her do things that she knew that both
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 2: of you never prayed about. And if you ask her,
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 2: she would have begged her life asking to do otherwise.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 2: The idea of two becoming one is that even if
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 2: one is down, the other can pick him up. See,
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 2: the worst thing you want to do to yourself is
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 2: to conquer the person who is your lifeline. So leadership
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 2: is not control. Leadership is influence. The way, listen, listen,
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 2: I know men love respect, but what I found about
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 2: respect is that respect is not dictated. Your life commands it.
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 2: That's it. When I think about my wife, I'm always
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 2: thinking of how to make her better. What can I do?
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 2: How can I help? Not how can I control your
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 2: life and make you miserable because I am your husband
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 2: and you have to obey me. Whenever you say I'm
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 2: the man in this house, you're officially not. Because if
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 2: you are, you don't have to say it. And leadership
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 2: entails that sometimes you are making a decision that maybe
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 2: the emotions of a woman is not allowing her to see.
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 2: And you stand your ground. One of the very important
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 2: qualities a man must have is his ability to stand
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 2: his ground over values of the family, over decisions that
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: have to be made. And I must tell you women,
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 2: you will not always understand him. And when you don't,
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 2: communicate and take it to God in prayers. I was
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 2: telling the people, my people in Abuja, That there are
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 2: two kinds of people... Builders and all others... When you
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 2: are a builder... Let's say for instance... You are building
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 2: a business... Or you are building a ministry... Or you
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 2: are building a career... There comes a point... In the
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 2: midst of that building... That if you look at... What
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 2: this person is doing... It looks like nonsense... But you
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 2: know you have the plan... Stay with the plan... Sometimes
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 2: you are not feeling... You are just somewhere in the plan...
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: That beauty is not part of the package... You are
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 2: somewhere in the plan that plenty is not part of
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 2: the package. Maybe now when I'm in town, I'm around.
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 2: There's actually no way I choose to lodge myself that
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 2: I can't do it. But it didn't start like that.
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 2: When this ministry started, I had one trouser. For a while.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: That's where I was. In the building. And I've said,
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 2: make sure anybody can call you anything. Not lazy and visionless. Actually,
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 2: some guys who are emotional and feel, this person told
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 2: me because I don't have money. No. It's not because
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 2: you don't have money. There's no plan. No. Show a
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 2: woman the plan, she won't forget it. There's no plan.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 2: I understand it's not here. So what's the next? Even
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: Peter asks Jesus, we have left all and followed thee.
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 2: What's going to be the result? If somewhere in the
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 2: plan we are going to be a bit like this
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 2: for a while, how are we going to come out?
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 2: What are you going to do? What are we going
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 2: to do? What's the plan? So don't blame your spouse
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 2: because things are down. Is there a plan? If there's
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 2: no plan, it's not too late. Sit down. You see,
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: one time I told my wife. And I said, do
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 2: you trust me? She said yes. I said, are you
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 2: sure you trust me? She said yes. I said, we'll
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: not have car for a while. Give me two months.
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 2: So I called one of the boys. I said, go
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 2: sell the car. We sold the car. And I had
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 2: some more money. Went to buy acres of land. Did
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 2: the survey, plotted everything, documents. Began to resell. In three
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: weeks I could afford to buy a car much more.
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 2: The price. That's the plan. How do you ride a
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 2: car that is actually bigger than your annual income? What
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 2: are you impressing? It's good to have good cars. And
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 2: I love good cars. Amen. I love good cars. Cars.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 2: Do you understand what I'm saying? Don't say pastor is just. No, no, no.
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 2: It's good to have. But you must have a plan.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 2: And let me advise you. Salary earners. Have something that
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 2: is not salaried. Any company policy can change. And that's
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 2: the end. It's good you have multiple streams. Am I communicating?
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 2: Are you sure? If I would advise, I would have
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 2: said at least have some real estate. Even if it's
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 2: a plot. Something you can resell. There was a time
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 2: they were begging people to come and buy land at
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 2: Ibejuleki for $ 350, 000. Begging. Begging. I'm not sure you can
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 2: even get at those same locations for 10 million. And
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 2: that was just a few years ago. Human population is increasing.
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 2: Things are changing. You've got to have a plan. I
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 2: don't know how I got there, but talking about leadership,
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 2: the finance of your home, take responsibility for it. Take
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 2: responsibility for it now before it gets too late. Nobody
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 2: is putting you under pressure. But take your position as
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 2: a leader. Plan together. Lack of money in the home frustrates.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 2: So we don't bring out unnecessary devils out of ourselves.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 2: Let's plan. And like I said, for the balance, there
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 2: comes a phase in the life of a builder where
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 2: nothing really looks like it. But do you have a plan?
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 2: So I round up with number eight. Number eight. Learn
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 2: the heart of spiritual warfare and prayer. There is something
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 2: called the power of a praying man. The power of
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 2: a praying husband. Thank you. Are you with me? Now listen.
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 2: One of the. Strongest way. The devil will try to
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 2: fight you. Is to make sure. That your home does
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 2: not fulfill God's desire. And it is actually spiritual. Spiritual.
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 2: That your spouse can actually begin to manifest certain things.
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 2: Not because the person is not trained. But because there
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 2: is a devil taking advantage of the person's weak emotions
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 2: to frustrate God's plan. And if you are not someone
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 2: who understands the art of warfare, you will fight yourselves
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 2: and leave the devil. I am saying there are certain
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 2: things that will face you that this one is not
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 2: character defect. This one is the devil trying to do
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 2: certain things and sometimes it's bringing sickness you just hear
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 2: this person is having this sickness what it was not
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 2: in god's package for us this was not what god
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 2: promised we will hold hands and pray and pray the
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 2: nonsense out do you know how to pray are you
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 2: a priest can you hold her by the hands can
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 2: you intercede for her Can you stand by her in
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 2: the labor room? As the priest there. Commanding that your
• 1:20:11
  Speaker 2: child will come forth. And your wife too will not
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 2: die in the process. Can you lay hands on her?
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 2: Not the one you do for the girl. It's okay.
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 2: I love marriage ministries. Online. All that. So we don't
• 1:20:26
  Speaker 2: have just the bad news. But understand that that's content.
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 2: Some things are for media. But do you actually pray?
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 2: When you drop those phones, do you pray? Do you
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 2: actually lay hands on? When was the last time you
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 2: laid hands on your wife and spoke as a priest?
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 2: Not as somebody who is staggering and just say some things.
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 2: Spoke as a priest. When was the last time you
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 2: confirmed what God is saying to her? When was the
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 2: last time? When was the last time you had a
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 2: word for her from the Lord? When was the last time?
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 2: When was the last time You studied the Bible together.
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 2: Do you read the Bible in your home? Because your
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 2: wife knows you don't read the Bible. She's amazed how
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 2: you preach. She's amazed how you go to church and
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 2: suit up. Some women look at their husband and know
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 2: that he's not really there. If you are not there,
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 2: your wife knows. And that's why the greatest compliment anybody
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 2: can give me is for my wife. When my wife
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 2: look at me and say, how can I be like you?
• 1:21:37
  Speaker 2: So we're already one. It touches me more than anything
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 2: else in the world. But this is the person that
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 2: sees me. She knows when I sleep. She knows when
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 2: I wake up. And sometimes it's not funny. One day
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 2: my wife looked at me and said, if you give
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 2: anybody your routine for a day, they will feel you
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 2: hate them. That's leadership. What kind of a man do
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 2: you want to be? The one who will destroy the
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 2: heart of your daughters about men? Or the one who
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 2: will inspire them to get married? The one that your
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 2: sons don't want to look like? Or the one who
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 2: they come to meet and say, be my spiritual father,
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 2: apart from be my physical father? I want all the
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 2: men in this room to stand. Sit down again. Now
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 2: stand up like the man in your prophetic destiny. Step
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 2: out all the men. Come on. Hold hands. Listen. See,
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 2: look at me. Look up. It doesn't matter what you
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 2: have believed. You will not fail. Sometimes you feel you
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: have weaknesses that has gotten to the point where now
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 2: you doubt your own masculinity and doubt your leadership skill.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you think of ways to just run out of
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 2: your environment and you feel you are a failure. I've
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 2: come to announce to you, you can't fail. And you
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 2: are not going to be a failure. Now some of
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 2: you are at a phase right now in your life
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 2: where you are building. You have a plan. And you
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: know it. But nothing looks like it. Nothing looks like it.
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 2: People who should respect you disrespect you. Because you are
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 2: somewhere in the plan that resources are not coming the
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 2: way they should come. And you wonder what is happening
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 2: around you. How that those who used to honor you
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 2: now look at you like something. And you are wondering,
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 2: hang on. Hang on. There's a reason why God has
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 2: made sure you are hearing what you are hearing now.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 2: Because he started a new lineage. I don't care about
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 2: the mistakes you have made in the past or the
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 2: dysfunctionality of your home. You are a different person. And
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 2: you are not going to die young. Your wives, your
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 2: women will not have to look for another man. Because
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 2: God is anointing you with fresh oil. Let me announce
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 2: this again. You are not a failure. And in case
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 2: you are building and now you want to stop building
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 2: because of the disrespect that comes from it, don't stop.
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 2: Don't marry somebody who understands it. Not every woman understands
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 2: who a builder is. Or communicate what you're building... To
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: that girl... That this is the plan... And let your
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 2: diligence be seen... Is that clear? Lift your hands.
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 2: I use you as a point of contact... To every man...
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 2: In this ministry... Sons, mentees... Connected across both... You are
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 2: not going to fail... Your fears will not catch up
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 2: with you. You will give your children the kind of
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 2: heritage you didn't get. You will give them the kind
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 2: of life you were not privileged to get. One day
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 2: your children will look at you and say we are
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 2: proud to be your children. Your wife will not die
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 2: by your side. I decree encouragement to every man who
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 2: is oughting I decree that the hand of God helps you.
• 1:26:09
  Speaker 2: I decree that you will not throw in the towel.
• 1:26:13
  Speaker 2: You will not be another failed generation. You will become
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 2: all that God intended for you. You will not vanish
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 2: on the way like smoke. And it is well with you.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 2: In Jesus' name. Let's celebrate these model men as they
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 2: go back to their seat. God bless you. Give them big,
• 1:26:34
  Speaker 2: big hands. One of the most difficult things to be
• 1:26:40
  Speaker 2: in the world is to be a man. Now, is
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 2: that the way you clap? Celebrating them, celebrate them, celebrate them. Now,
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 2: may I please ask in a moment, all the ladies
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 2: in this house, please stand. And I'd like for you
• 1:26:58
  Speaker 2: to please step out. may I announce to you with
• 1:27:13
  Speaker 2: all gladness you are not what the society defines you
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: as you are much more and being a woman is
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 2: not a limitation on the quality of your destiny you
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 2: are a woman still carrying a child you will do
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 2: much more your daughters are praying to be like you
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 2: because of what you mirror And because of what you
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 2: showed to them. Now listen. I understand that one of
• 1:27:39
  Speaker 2: the things. That is peculiar. Not just to you. I
• 1:27:42
  Speaker 2: know to both genders. But much more to the woman.
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 2: Is sometimes the injury you have to work with. And
• 1:27:48
  Speaker 2: you wear makeup and put all those things under. And
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 2: you still have to look good. Regardless of what you feel.
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 2: Are you aware you can yield those things to God?
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 2: Are you aware you are not the names they called you?
• 1:27:59
  Speaker 2: The different names called you. Wicked. Wicked. Somebody left you
• 1:28:04
  Speaker 2: and said, you can't keep a man. And that word
• 1:28:06
  Speaker 2: has been ringing in your head. And whenever a man
• 1:28:09
  Speaker 2: comes to your life, you think they are doing you
• 1:28:11
  Speaker 2: a favor. No. You are made after the order of Christ.
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 2: You are the one showing us what Christ would have
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 2: been if he was a woman. Lift your hands. You
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 2: are not going to fail. One of the things the
• 1:28:29
  Speaker 2: devil used to fight women is so these thicknesses. You
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 2: will not be sick. You will not lose your home.
• 1:28:40
  Speaker 2: You will not vanish on the way like smoke. The
• 1:28:44
  Speaker 2: wisdom to emerge after the order of the proof of
• 1:28:48
  Speaker 2: that one woman. Receive it. And I call you blessed.
• 1:28:52
  Speaker 2: If there is any one of you who is in
• 1:28:55
  Speaker 2: a season of confusion and the great confusion is gone,
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 2: that fear that will I ever get the bone of
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 2: my bones the flesh of my flesh take it away
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 2: from your heart I decree by the hand of God
• 1:29:10
  Speaker 2: you will not miss your spouse and your hands will
• 1:29:13
  Speaker 2: not be wrongly joined in marriage you will be a
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 2: woman of purpose nations of the earth will call you
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 2: blessed there is no door that will not open for
• 1:29:26
  Speaker 2: you it is well with you In Jesus mighty name
• 1:29:31
  Speaker 2: we are prayed. Let's give them a big hand. Back
• 1:29:35
  Speaker 2: to their seats. God bless you. Now let's all rise. Male,
• 1:29:39
  Speaker 2: female rise on your feet everyone. And give God praise
• 1:29:42
  Speaker 2: for an amazing service we've had. Let's give God praise.
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Thank you Jesus. We bless your holy name.
• 1:29:55
  Speaker 2: In Jesus mighty name we are prayed. And I decree
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 2: that everything you have heard this morning will be retained.
• 1:30:08
  Speaker 2: You will walk in greater wisdom. Your womb will be
• 1:30:13
  Speaker 2: heaven on earth. And you will not fail God. You
• 1:30:22
  Speaker 2: will not become another failed generation. You will do well.
• 1:30:29
  Speaker 2: You will do well. You will do well. It is done.
• 1:30:35
  Speaker 2: In Jesus' mighty name. Let's give God a big, big hand.
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 1: The message you just listened to is sponsored by the
• 1:30:42
  Speaker 1: friends and partners of Femi Lazarus Apostolic Ministries Ecumenical.
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 2: Flame.
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 1: To partner with Flame, kindly make use of these account details.
• 1:30:51
  Speaker 2: 221-500-5289 UBA