Latest / The imuRgency Room / The "DL Man" Epidemic

Transcript

The "DL Man" Epidemic · The imuRgency Room

0:00
My definition of a punk is a DL man and my baby daddy was a punk
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and majority of the men that I messed with in the military were
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punks and I just didn't realize the concern.
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I need everyone to listen because when I'm scrolling on my
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free page and I see a video about a man disrespecting a
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woman, I don't want to open the comment section and see any.
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That's not a real man, by the way, he got to be gay.
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He got to be DL. The rise in the DL police on
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this app is straight women trying to make sense of the fact
0:26
that they now know that men hate them.
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OK, so you think your man is on the down low?
0:29
Here are 5 foolproof ways to find out for sure.
0:32
Girl, I've been exposing DL men since 2022 and have successfully
0:35
saved the lives of 40 plus women from these demonic boy lovers.
0:39
Do you see how crazy that sounds?
0:41
Were you intrigued? Did you jump because it's time
0:43
we talk about it. Hey guys, it's up to emergency
0:45
and welcome back to my channel. And today we are talking about
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something that has been sitting on my heart for a while now and
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a conversation that I feel like needs to be had because I think
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where this conversation started was fine and well-intentioned,
0:59
but where it's going and where it is right now is largely
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problematic. And I don't think we're seeing
1:04
it as such. And what I'm talking about is
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the rise of DL hunting or down low manhunting.
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And it seems Tenley to talk about this seeing as there have
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been DL allegations of let's say presidential proportions if you
1:16
catch my drift. But also just general uptick in
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DL hunter content and commentary spreading online.
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Like I've been seeing this trend online of DL hunters or at least
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just women telling absolutely abhorrent stories about men.
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And the comments under these videos are always quick to say
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that the man in question here is actually just down low or
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secretly gay and implying that that presumption could be the
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only possible explanation as to why he would treat a woman that
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way. Almost as if blatant misogyny
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hasn't existed for actual centuries.
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And when I see things like this, I just have to ask, why are we
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in it? What did we do?
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Like I feel like we've circled around from allyship to just
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blatant homophobia because why are we using gay as an insult
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again? I mean gay as an insult, just in
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a sort of different way. Like honestly, some of you are
1:58
just getting a little too comfortable using it in a
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derogatory way. Like I'm even seeing people
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starting to say slurs because they have been reclaimed again,
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right? And you may be asking yourself,
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Rumi, is it really that deep for you to make a whole video about
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it? And to that I say yes, actually,
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because at its core, when you're ascribing negative traits like
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being a misogynist, hating women or just being too feminine or
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sassy in derogatory ways, such as saying that someone is DL or
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just secretly gay, what is that really saying about what you
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think about gay people quickly? And if you know me, you know, I
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go hard for my girlies and gays. But it really does get to a
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point because it feels like there's a portion of women out
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there that are finding out that men are actually just
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misogynistic because it hasn't been more front facing and just
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outwardly allowed over the past let's say 10 or 20 years.
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And instead of confronting and addressing the roots of misogyny
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and misogynoir, it for some reason is getting blamed for
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actually being gay. Like, why are ancient misogynist
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men getting thrown out the gays? We don't want them.
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And also just like, why do we assume that a terrible person is
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gay? Like, why would that be a
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characteristic of gayness or at least latent gayness?
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Like, yeah, there's like the whole like, oh, he's so evil, he
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must be sexually repressed of it all.
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But like, no, actually, I heard this quote from a while ago
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about misogyny saying that, like, men don't love women but
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are still sexually attracted to them.
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Like, right. That's exactly what
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objectification is. And that right there is deeply
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rooted misogyny in question. We've been fighting for years
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that men don't see women as equals, but rather as things to
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satisfy them. And I feel like that revelation
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is me preaching to the choir. But I just want to reinforce
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again that that is not a symptom of queerness.
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That's a symptom of years of patriarchy.
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Now, am I saying that this hasn't happened in the history
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of ever? That like, a man is actually
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repressing his identity and it comes out in the form of hatred
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towards women? Like, no, that surely has
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happened. And sure, it does happen.
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Like, there are many of stories out there.
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Like, that's why this whole trend has taken off.
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And this isn't to invalidate anyone who's experienced this,
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but specifically what I'm talking about is just like this
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wave of TikTok DL hunters and the insistence of calling every
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man whoever shows negative behavior towards women or on the
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flip side shows an ounce of femininity.
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We as a society, or at least as the Internet, throw them deep in
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the DL basket or at least just use it as a weaponized insult
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against them. And I think the language we use
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here is really important. And as we're going to get into
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later in the video, words do mean things.
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Like I hate to say it, but some straight men, a lot actually
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just hate women. And given the times we're living
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in, it's never been so blatantly in our faces.
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Now let's say a little deeper into the fascination around the
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need to figure out who is DL and who is not.
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Now I do want to say right off the bat, I understand fearing
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and fidelity because that truly sucks and is one of the hardest
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feelings you can feel in a relationship.
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But in the case of this DL debacle, that doesn't feel like
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that is entirely what this is. This feels a little more witch
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hunty. It feels like there's this need
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to know or to label someone who isn't behaving in a way that
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you'd like them to as DL. And as an addendum to that,
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usually this notion of DL Ness is framed within the context and
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narrative of sexual DD. And again, I'm not here to
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invalidate anyone's experience or to like, talk down to anybody
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because yes, sure, this happens to people.
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Well, like, why not just leave it alone if that's what you
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suspect is happening to you? Or if this man is being
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emotionally abusive or even verbally misogynistic, leave
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that man alone anyway. Like the reasonings behind why
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he may treat you or other people terribly doesn't have to be
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because he's secretly into men. Like you can leave a man for
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whatever reason. And of course, when I say this,
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I mean like, if you're able to safely, I'm not talking about
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instances where this is dangerous, of course.
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And it's just like so many things about this conversation
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suck, obviously, but one thing I think about is how hard we work
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to move away from gender norms only to then go back and
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reinforce them with the DL witch hunt of it all.
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Like, I really hate to come on here and defend a man, but like,
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if a man has done anything that could be deemed as vaguely
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feminine, then that's a wrap. And of course, this is all using
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the antiquated heteronormative definitions of femininity and
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masculinity. And it just seems like this
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terrible backslide, which is not surprising given the
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increasingly traditional times that we're currently living in.
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Like guys that they float their DL and we got to burn them at
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the stake. But if they I think they're just
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a woman hater. Now let's take a little deep
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dive into what are the contributing factors of like
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this DL epidemic to begin with. And I think first and foremost,
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the problems start at home. So this is the section we're
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getting into the history of men on men cry.
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That does sound a little homoerotic.
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No, I mean we're talking about the history of men policing
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other men's behavior. I feel like we definitely saw
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this more in the early 20 tens growing up.
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But like the y'all remember the hashtag no homo of it all And
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like men straight men actually using that unironically for or
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sag a completely normal sentence about another guy.
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Like there were times where boys in middle school and high school
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were being weird about eating bananas and that still happens
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to this day. Like God forbid a straight man
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eats a banana or a hot dog in public.
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Like I promise you the food's not going to make you gay if you
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weren't already. Fast forward to today where the
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statements evolved into things like pause AO and things like I
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man as signals that one person has gone too far into a non
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masculine territory or if what was said could be interpreted as
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some kind of homosexual rigmarole double entendre.
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And the thing about it is that at best statements like this and
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conversations like this either lead to a de escalation or just
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general disengagement from the conversation at hand and that
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worse occasional violence. And we see this most often in
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media now for Gen. Z and Janafa with streamers.
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I didn't do it. Say no homo what you mean I said
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pause. I said pause.
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Like sure this is definitely better than beating on gay
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people and being physically violent, but is this really
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where male allyship begins? Steering clear of topics or
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conversations that don't fit into the rigid sense of
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masculinity? What immediately comes to mind
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for me is like like the whole rhetoric go just don't bring
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that shit to me or saying pause or no homo isn't enough.
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In order to be in community with people, queer or not, you got to
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do your part to facilitate a space that people can be
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comfortable in. Like you're denying real aspects
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of your your friends that most of the time aren't actually gay
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and you know that so that you can be friends and operate
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within the masculine bounds of friendship.
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Which is just weird. Think about it like this.
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Say you have friends that are different from you.
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The more you treat people like regular people and not like some
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uncomfortable anomaly to be around, the better it'll be for
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us all. And it's nice and very cool by
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all to say that. But like that also really does
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require a shift in perspective from men and women to then not
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go on assuming that just because a guy is friends with gays that
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he's also gay zesty or DL or even if he doesn't have any
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outwardly gay friends. We need to stop with the belief
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that certain behaviors are quantifiably gay.
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Like for real tolerance and basic human empathy.
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Check. Now we're going to get a little
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academic with it and talk about a study around the concept of
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homo sociality. And I think homo sociality is
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something that we're seeing more and more of between men.
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And if you're unfamiliar, homo sociality is a form of men
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policing others behaviors and a somewhat panopticon style.
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The term homo social was popularized by queer theorist
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Eve Sedgwick, and the concept of sociality describes and defines
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social bonds between persons of the same sex.
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It is, for example, frequently used in studies on men and
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masculinities. They're defined as a mechanism
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and a social dynamic that explains the maintenance of
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hegeonomic masculinity. A popular use of the concept is
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found in studies on male friendship, male bonding, and
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fraternity orders, and it is also frequently applied to
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explain how men, through their friendships and intimate
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collaborations with other men, maintain and defend the gender
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order and patriarchy. Basically, it's the concept of
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men seeking the approval of other men by dogging on women
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more behavior in a way that is most pleasing to the social
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group, which is usually not including men or gays.
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And this is not to say that these men are gay or homosexual
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for doing so. But studies show that men have
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historically seek to build camaraderie and respect and move
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in a way that gains the approval of other men as to not teeter
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the norm and uphold patriarchy. And this right here is misogyny
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at play. Seeking the approval of the same
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sex by ostracizing, isolating, and objectifying the other.
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And because seeking approval from your Bros can be considered
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SUS or glazing, you toss in a lot of homo phobic rhetoric and
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verbiage just so that everyone knows you are not a homo.
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And unfortunately, even when it comes to women, they are no
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longer people but rather social currency, which is as scary and
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as terrible as it sounds like. If the Bros think she's hot,
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then that's leverage for the man.
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The discontinuity between male homosociality and homosexuality
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results in male homosocial relationships being a form of
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male bonding, which is characterized by homosocial
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desire as well as homosexual panic.
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Homo social desires refers to men turning their attention to
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other, and homosexual panic refers to the fear of this
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attention gliding over into homosexual desire.
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That's right, the fear that if you're too good to your
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homeboys, you might actually want your homeboy.
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In an attempt to emphasize heterosexuality, fear or hatred
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of homosexuals and misogynist language are developed.
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And again, none of this theory is to excuse misogyny or
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misogynoir and are 1000% things that need to be unpacked and
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changed about the culture of masculinity and especially
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within black masculinity. But that is just the level set
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A. Lot of theories just that male
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homosociality exists on the same spectrum as homoeroticism, but
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because of homo hysteria, there's a really strong
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conscious social effort to create this diacritical
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opposition between homosexuality and homosociality in male
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relationships. So we're conceptualizing male
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homosocial relationships as a form of male bonding that
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involves homosocial desire and intimacy as well as homosexual
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panic. So they're constantly turning
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their attention to other men, but then there's a really
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intense fear that this attention would glide into the homosexual.
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Territory. On top of that, I think that
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women being homosocial in a patriarchal world is more more
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of a form of protection and survival as opposed to why men
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are homosocial. Because within a patriarchal
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society, male relationships are often structured in a way that
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reinforces and perpetuates the patriarchy.
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Their relationships often function as a way to maintain
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social dominance and male privilege, which is why women
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are commodities amongst men. Now we've debriefed on man on
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man crime, it's time that we now turn our focus towards the rise
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of policing men's behavior from women, which is kind of crazy,
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say, given the patriarch give it all, but hear me out.
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And one of the more prominent ways we've been seeing this on
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social media have been from the rise of the.
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Sassy man Apocalypse. Sassy male apocalypse yes, the
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sassy man apocalypse and I hate to be the two woke friend, no I
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don't. But this trend never fully sat
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right with my spirit because it just got a little too
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comfortable with making claims around sexuality and gender
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expression. Oftentimes it feels like
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actually policing someone's gender expression, which like
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guys like thought we put in the legwork to move away from
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classic gender stereotypes and roles to a more fluid one.
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And what was all that for then? The labels of Sassy, Chalant,
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and Zesty feel like labels to scare men into acting a certain
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way or to not act a certain way. And by using gay as the
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instigating term, it's just again, reinforcing homophobia.
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Because if they were gay, then what?
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Why is being gay or fruity or effeminate the cobra insult
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here? I love taking the piss out of
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men. I will do it every day and twice
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on a Sunday. OK don't get it twisted.
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However, seeing women and girls and just people in general
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saying men are like sassy and things like that for liking like
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stereotypically feminine things. All for not being traditionally
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masculine is a very slippery slope.
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It's a very slippery slope into gender essentialism, and it's
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also wildly homophobic. Like it's similar to when people
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say things like zesty or SUS or punk, especially punk and
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fruity. Like I feel like we're getting a
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little too comfortable using these terms when especially for
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those of us that are straight to insinuate someone is gay.
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And again, even if they are, what's the problem?
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Like, why is this something that we need to be super vigilant
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over, like at all? Harkins back to the misconstrue
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belief that traditional men traditionally treated women well
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and with respect. And this current rise in things
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like red pill content and women hating somehow has to do with
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like the closeted homosexual men when again, to reinforce this
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video's thesis, being a woman hater is not a queer trait.
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In fact, I'd actually go as far to argue that that is the trait
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of the traditional man. If we're looking historically,
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the narrative from all sides of the Internet has devolved from.
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Yeah, there are times where people take their closeted
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repressed emotions and resentment that they can't live
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their truth out on women unfairly and unjustifiably.
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To now every man who mistreats a woman is a secret homo when no
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men can be and often times are terrible people.
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Like this whole DL until proven straight mentality needs to go.
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Like just toxic men who act violent or hateful to women to
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the gay team is crazy because misogyny has existed for so
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long. And if we want to take it a step
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further, that thought process also is insinuating that gay men
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hate women, which is like, OK. And I know that this is a
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sweeping generalization which likely does not match every
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single case, but many cases that are being publicized on social
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media and are becoming part of regular conversation can be and
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often times are harmful. Like the lack of attraction from
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queer men to women does not automatically mean that they
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hate them. And I know that that's common
14:33
sense. But the way that this
14:34
conversation has to fall really makes you wonder because I think
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this whole thing is just crazy. And again, I do want to preface
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because I feel like I'm coming on hot with this video.
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This is all not to defend straight men.
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This is to defend and the gays because it has been gay and
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wicked. No, Ariana, because at the end
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of the day, men demonstrating behavior that you don't like or
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agree with so you label them as gay as a response is homophobic,
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full stop. And I feel like we need to be
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real about that. Now, a key piece to this
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conversation that I've been meaning to talk about just
15:02
generally and honestly, a piece of nuance that I don't feel like
15:05
is talked about enough, especially in the context of
15:07
this conversation has to do around the concepts of by
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erasure, biphobia and the intersection of bisexuality and
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people of color. Quite literally putting me buy
15:15
in BIPOC. I'm kidding.
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That's not what that means. Although when I first heard the
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term BIPOC, I thought it was bisexual people of color, but we
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have learned it is Black Indigenous.
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But like I was saying, I think another aspect of this that so
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often gets looked over is the fact of the conversation around
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young men often gets very black and white.
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And people tend to forget that by people exist.
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And you may be like, yeah, OK, I get it by people exist, but
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like, why are people not being honest about it and living in
15:41
their truth then? Well, biphobia.
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And no, biphobia isn't just a buzzword that I made-up and
15:47
decided to throw on this video. There are actual studies to
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demonstrate that people report more negative sentiments towards
15:52
bisexual individuals than gay and lesbian individuals.
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Which for one is interesting, and two is a whole inter
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community discourse that could be a whole separate video.
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But for the sake of this video, we looked into a study that
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specifically focuses on the intersections of bisexual
16:05
identity. And according to this study,
16:07
which is an examination of attitudes towards bisexual
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people at the intersections of gender and race and ethnicity,
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people actually reacted and more negatively to bisexual men than
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women, Black and Hispanic bisexuals, more than white
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bisexuals, and more negatively towards trans bisexuals than
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cisgender bisexuals. OK, cool.
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But what does all this mean? This is all to say that the
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demographic that experiences the most negative reactions and
16:27
sentiments are BIPOC trans men bisexuals, are BIPOC trans men
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bisexuals and then CIS BIPOC bisexuals.
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Like not that this is like the Ginny and Georgia Depression
16:36
Olympics or anything, but this is more to show the barriers and
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challenges this community faces and how that might lead for some
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people to stay DL. Because again, I feel like this
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part of the conversation isn't talked about enough.
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Often times DL people are not just gay, they are bisexual
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because they're still sexually intimate and often times
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emotionally intimate with the women that they're dating while
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also having an emotional relations with men.
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So just because DL is messing with guys on the low does not
17:01
mean that he was just gay. And this mentality that we're
17:03
talking about as to why people stay DL is also rooted in
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patriarchy. Like see, for the men out there
17:09
that hate when I talk about the patriarchy, it literally impacts
17:11
everyone. Lastly, for this point in the
17:15
study, current discourse surrounding the down low or DL
17:18
suddenly characterized secretive bisexuality as being all but
17:21
exclusive to black men. Interestingly enough, classical
17:23
studies of bisexuality in the US focus heavily on white men and
17:26
women. Shocker.
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And according to that same study, black and Latino bisexual
17:30
men have also been found to be less likely to disclose their
17:32
same sex behaviors, particularly to their partners that are
17:35
women. And when you hear this, it
17:36
really reinforces some of the sentiments around the whole DL
17:38
debate being like, oh, DL men are being very dishonest to
17:41
women about who they are and who they play with.
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And he may be asking why that is.
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Well, 1/3 crucial factor is the strong lack of acceptance of
17:48
bisexuality and homosexuality in black communities that several
17:52
researchers have noted. And the reasoning behind that is
17:54
that it's likely that the strong association between masculinity
17:57
and heterosexuality makes it difficult for ethnic minority
17:59
men to openly explore same sexual desires and develop a
18:03
bisexual or homosexual identity. The research goes on to state
18:06
that the strong association between masculinity and
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heterosexuality and black Latino ethnic minorities should not be
18:11
understood as an essential link says they cannot be seen
18:14
independently from the social position of ethnic minorities.
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And for me at least, I feel like it's true that there are vastly
18:19
more queer people in compact couples due to society, and I
18:22
feel like many of us contribute to that daily via the rhetoric
18:25
that we both use on and offline. Bisexual people, and more
18:28
specifically bisexual men, exist in droves.
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But a common thing that I hear from bisexual men is that it's
18:34
harder for them to date or approach women if they are open
18:36
about the fact that they've also been with or will continue to be
18:40
with men. And I'm getting this straight
18:41
from the source. I have dated plenty of by men in
18:44
my day. We'll all share the similar
18:46
sentiments of like being more romantically attracted to women
18:49
and would ideally like to marry women.
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But the large stigma around being a by man who engages in
18:53
the other side of byness becomes a sort of barrier to entry and
18:57
thus it is easier and more convenient to then continue to
19:01
be with men. And honestly, I don't know how
19:02
to feel about being told that as the man who is with the bisexual
19:06
man at the time. Well, considering I'm single, I
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think that speaks for itself. And this isn't necessarily to
19:11
call the girlys out, more so to call everyone in to have a real
19:14
conversation about the latent internalized homophobia and
19:17
misogyny that's turning people off, or at least adverting
19:20
people from actually taking by men seriously or being attracted
19:23
to them in the first place. I think recognizing this in
19:25
ourselves is the first step, because that just not in my yard
19:28
business does not make you the ally that you think you are.
19:31
Like whenever I talk about this I always think of that clip of
19:34
Molly from Insecure cutting things off without one fine ass
19:37
solid dude because he said that he experimented with the guy
19:40
once in college and decided that he wasn't into it.
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Like that man made it clear that he was not even by but he still
19:45
got the boot just for confirming that himself.
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Like okay, biphobia is a real thing.
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Molly was running a strict program, you hear me?
19:55
But the point I'm trying to make here is that it's hard to have a
19:57
conversation around the rates of like DL men not living in their
20:00
truth while also the other side of things being punitive and
20:03
mildly homophobic to those that do.
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It's contributing to some of the reasons as to why people stay in
20:08
the closet or are on the DL. You always see that sentiment of
20:11
like when it comes to being bi and you're a man, then you're
20:14
just not confident enough to say that you're fully gay, but if
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you're a girl, you just want male attention.
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Which is obviously for one, just biphobic rhetoric, and two, for
20:21
both cases is implying that the goal is a man.
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But this sentiment is still. Race of an ideology is even in
20:26
that one episode of Insecure, the worry is that man who just
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experimented once, mind you, is just ADL man.
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And when it comes to by acceptance and by attraction or
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lack thereof, the main reasons I see online for women saying it's
20:38
a preference to not be with a bisexual man has to do with
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sexual health. Which like if you're with a
20:43
partner that you're actually interested in and is mature and
20:46
safe, that is something that you can easily check or get tested.
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And I think primarily it's really unfair and dangerous
20:52
rhetoric to think that every bisexual or gay man instantly
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has as a incurable disease like HIV.
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Like yes, stay vigilant and care about your sexual health
21:00
generally, but that right there is a massive and harmful
21:03
generalization. Another thing that I hear is
21:05
that it's just a preference to not want to date bisexual men.
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And y'all might not be ready for this one, but that's not a
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preference that's a rule and just homophobia.
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Like please what does that have to do with you?
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If that man is with you honestly what does that matter what he's
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done previously? Like it's like the same
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mentality of someone deciding to not be with you based on your
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body count. Like why does that matter
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especially if you're already keeping your sexual health in
21:28
check. I actually saw a really great
21:29
TikTok on the concept like black masculinity and homosexuality
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talking about how like the worst thing a black man can be is gay.
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Not me being Public Enemy #1. Can we actually be that the
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worst thing that you can be as a black man is gay.
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Let's sit with that mad, isn't it?
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Not on a Not a racist, not an actual criminal.
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A gay man. 2 words. Religion and misogyny, both of
21:56
which were arguably inherited from colonization, but that's
22:00
the topic for another name. But the conversation goes
22:03
further, stating that bisexuality itself is an attack
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on traditional black masculinity.
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And homosexuality we already know, but bisexuality as well is
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something that's very frowned upon both within black male
22:13
centered circles and in general society.
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And like, we don't need to get into the weeds.
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Or more so, the roots of black masculinity and why that is such
22:22
a strong thing, at least in America, because guess what?
22:25
It stems from slam. But yeah, OK, at this point in
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the video, we've talked about the guys, we've talked about the
22:30
girls. It's time we talk about the game
22:33
and more so bringing this all around the concept of gay or
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queer people being the butt of the joke and ultimately the ones
22:38
suffering the long term consequences of this whole
22:41
debate. At the end of the day, all this
22:42
discourse just reinforces people's latent disapproval or
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problems with queerness and gay people.
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And at the core of the idea, allegations or identifying SUS
22:51
or zesty men is a disdain for queer men.
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Even if the man in question is not gay themselves, they should
22:57
rectify their behavior and abide by the antiquated patriarchal
23:00
standards as to not be mistaken. Looking for gay.
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Like the concept of smiling in your gay besties face while also
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praying that your kids don't turn out to be gay themselves
23:11
and bleeding deep down that your friends are destined for hell or
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preferring that your man isn't bisexual is all just straight up
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homophobia and we can't continue to sugarcoat it as anything
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else. Normalizing sentiments like this
23:22
only legitimizes and gets more people comfortable with the
23:24
inevitable repealing of gay rights and the rise of
23:27
homophobia. Because right now it's still in
23:29
its coded messaging dog whistling stage.
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But as we know with most things that have followed this pattern
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over the past couple of years specifically.
23:36
Do you think that President Trump is a fascist?
23:38
And after President Trump said that, I said yes.
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The less we check it, the more comfortable we come around these
23:43
ideas, the more overt the messaging will become.
23:46
And that will inevitably lead into public sentiment and
23:48
ultimately policies. And if you don't care about any
23:51
of that, let me make it personal.
23:52
It's time we talk about the real life dangers of outing DL men.
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Because with a lot of the discourse around outing DL men,
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especially from my LGBT qua brothers and sisters, there
24:00
unfortunately is a real danger that comes with outing these
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individuals who aren't ready to be outed.
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And oftentimes that could result in things like bodily harm or
24:08
just flat out schmurter like guys, come on, especially in the
24:11
community, we know the dangers of being outed.
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So let's just leave these DL men alone.
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And that's not to protect them, that's to protect you. 2 wrongs
24:20
don't make it right. And outing someone really is
24:22
never OK. And I thought we knew this.
24:24
We never know people's situations.
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And while yes, being played by ADL man is not fun, whether
24:29
you're a woman or the secret hookup, but please leave that
24:32
that man alone. And I know there are situations
24:33
in which some people have built lives together.
24:35
Maybe there are kids involved. And I wanted to explain that
24:38
cheating is not OK and everyone has different circumstances and
24:41
cannot possibly speak to them all.
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And when I'm speaking about this generally, I don't mean those
24:45
extenuating circumstances. But if you do think that your
24:48
man is DL and you're able to safely leave that situation, do
24:51
so. While sexuality preferences can
24:53
be problematic, you don't need to be a part of someone's
24:55
process if they themselves aren't ready to be who they are.
24:59
You don't need to be a part of the process of helping them
25:01
figure that out if you don't want to.
25:02
But that also doesn't mean that you're entitled to out someone,
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because outing people can be very traumatic, further repress
25:07
people and or put them in severe danger.
25:10
And while it's nice to think that we've completely overcome
25:12
homophobia and now live in a society where it doesn't impact
25:15
your daily life as a queer person, that unfortunately is
25:18
far from the truth. The needle has certainly been
25:21
pushed forward, but there is still a lot more work to be done
25:24
and much to overcome, especially if you have intersectional
25:26
identities. It impacts people from all
25:28
levels, from personal life to career.
25:30
Especially when the Internet is on a witch hunt.
25:32
And I completely understand it can be easy to get caught up in
25:35
it and sometimes it could be really entertaining or even
25:37
funny. But I think it's about time we
25:38
check in with ourselves and see what kind of verbiage and
25:41
rhetoric we are using online and in real life surrounding the
25:44
queer community. Because at the end of the day,
25:45
when that day got to end, we do not have to live this way.
25:48
These are all really just social constructs we created to uphold
25:51
the patriarchal system that is obviously not working for any of
25:55
us. Men, please release yourself
25:57
from the shackles of homophobia and be yourself.
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Therapy and self afflection if you're required into my ladies,
26:03
especially my straight girls watching.
26:05
Let's please look inward and address some of that
26:08
internalized homophobia and misogyny.
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Because yes, unfortunately y'all can be under some spells too.
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OK into my gaze. Leave that DL trade alone.
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Put that down so that we can all maximize our joint liberated and
26:24
DL free slay.