Latest / Salon Success Secrets — The podcast for salon owners who are done hustling harder and ready to break their revenue ceiling. / Unlocking the Secrets to a Self-Assured Professional Life

Transcript

Unlocking the Secrets to a Self-Assured Professional Life · Salon Success Secrets — The podcast for salon owners who are done hustling harder and ready to break their revenue ceiling.

• 0:34
  Speaker 1: All right, all right, all right.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: It's a great day to dive in to a really fun topic that is a hotspot inside of our industry and just really in life in general.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: If you have ever met somebody with incredible self-confidence, or you yourself have experienced it or been around it, you know just the power that self-confidence can have, and we know, when everybody on our team is empowered with that self-confidence, there are incredible things that can happen.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: Awesome.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: So what is self-confidence?
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: And if you look at the word of self-confidence, or even the word confidence, it's a belief or conviction that an outcome will be favorable.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: So when you have that certainty in yourself or that self-confidence to make a decision, that's when you're really able to stay in your power and it creates some really incredible things.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, and self-confidence inside of the beauty industry is gonna be a really powerful tool to have.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: It's just gonna convey a message to everybody that you're working with, that you are certain about what it is that you're providing, and just they're gonna feel at ease knowing that you have their best interest at heart.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: So we know that there are three pillars of self-confidence that we're gonna dive into today so that you can almost do a scorecard on yourself and say, hey, I'm really strong in this one, or hey, I have a really huge opportunity here.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: So that you can have that opportunity to be certain in the decisions you make, be certain in the business that you're growing, which will ripple effect onto your team and to your community.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: So the three pillars of self-confidence are self-efficiency that's a tongue twister.
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: And advocacy.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: I got that one good, all right, self-esteem and self-respect.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: So we're gonna uncover each of those today to really help you understand.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: Hey, what are the tools or technology that I need to maybe become the most beautiful version of myself?
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: Yes, I love that.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: So, really, what is self-efficacy?
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: So self-efficacy is really an individual's belief in his or her capacity to execute behaviors necessary to produce specific outcomes, and so it's really having that belief that you have the capacity to execute whatever it is that you need.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: And if you've been brand new at anything before, that self-efficacy can be a slippery slope because you've never done it before, and so sometimes that belief isn't always there.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: You have to do it a couple of times before you really feel like, hey, I feel strong, I feel like my self-efficacy is where it should be.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: I know that I'm gonna be able to perform up to what the guest standards are, what the salon or spa standards are, and really just kind of knock it out of the park with this guest.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that you said that, lindsay.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: It brings me to something with the beautiful word of try.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I've been taught that are you going to try or are you going to?
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: So if that's ever been said to you, you like, all of a sudden it almost can trigger you in a way and be like oh my gosh, I guess I'm going to.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: But to know that try is just really a beautiful word and when you think about try, it's really that you're just going to put your best effort forward.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: And so, in reality, when you're looking at diving into creating that space of making decisions or understanding if you're doing the right thing is sometimes you just got to try it out and to give yourself some grace If things don't go 100% the way that you plan to take it as a lesson, learn and to truly grow from that.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: And so that's a really powerful thing to do with your team as well.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: When you're coaching is like you might have been in a conversation with someone.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: They're like yeah, I'm just going to try.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: And you're like try, you're going to try, are you going to?
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: And so, like you just want to create that space of like trying is okay At the end of the day just try it out.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: That's all you got to do is try it out, and then you'll give the power to know hey, is this for me, or what can I do to improve what I'm trying out?
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Yes, I love that you mentioned that, jen.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: I think that's a beautiful lens to look at.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Try through, you know, because how will you ever develop that self-efficacy if you don't try?
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: You know I think so many people get so rigid about, you know, making the outcome what they want it to be initially.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: But the truth is you do just have to try and that's how you build that.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: You know that self-efficacy is really just believing in yourself that you have those abilities to accomplish the tasks and achieve the goals.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: You know, and that way, hey, it doesn't matter if you make a mistake, because you know we're supposed to make mistakes.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: That's part of the human experience.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: And you know you don't have to learn through pain.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: That's not the only way that you have to learn, but you know you can learn through any mistakes and they don't have to be painful.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: It's just like you finding your boundaries of what works and what doesn't work.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: You know, almost be like, if you know, we cheer on toddlers when they, you know, or babies when they start to walk and become toddlers.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: But you know, when somebody is new inside of the beauty industry, you know people can come down hard on them for not immediately knowing how to.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: You know, do a full set of volume lashes, or, you know, do a full balayage, or you know, whatever it might be.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: But, like, the truth is, you have to learn and you have to kind of bump back and forth, side to side, and kind of learn those boundaries of what works and what doesn't work.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: And you know that can really, you know, solidify you in that self-efficacy, part of self-confidence, and you know, when you strengthen that portion of it, you know and know, hey, it's okay to try, it's okay to make mistakes, I'm going to continue to get better and that's really what's going to make me strong in this area, for sure.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: So let's look at what's next is self-esteem.
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: So, self-esteem is the overall evaluation and perception of one's worth and value as a person.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: And you know we've heard the word esteem before, but the word self like, if you think about this too, like there's an acronym that I like to use for the word self, and it's sleep for the S-E, exercise, l love and F food.
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: Because for you to really have a beautiful self-esteem about yourself, like, you do have to have those factors in place to really be able to truly view yourself and love yourself to the high, to your highest good.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: And so, like, if you're not getting enough sleep, you know that can impact you.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: If you're not doing a mild exercise or intense exercise, whatever it may be for you, and if you're really not giving yourself that opportunity to love yourself, to, to share gratitude with yourself and to make sure that you're feeding the body, your body, the nutrients it needs, then that's greatly going to impact yourself esteem, and that's greatly going to impact the relationship that you not only have it with yourself, but the relationship that you have with other people as well.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a beautiful acronym for self.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: You know, and I also, when I think of you know self-esteem, I really think of you know, do I like myself and do I love myself?
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: You know, because there's a difference between like and love and you want to make sure that you have both.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You know, and and really, you know, I think the people that have the most confidence, you know, just really work on their inner self-talk.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: You know, and not only are they honoring their body, like you just mentioned with the self-acronym, but they're also honoring their mental health and and their inward thoughts.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: You know, they're they're kind of taking an audit of the way that they speak to themselves.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: You know, and and really working on being more loving and kind to you know, their, their mind, body and spirit.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: You know, finding ways to really incorporate all three of those portions to to really impact their self-esteem.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: You know, because if you have been around somebody who has high self-esteem, you know you, you notice that they just they like themselves and they love themselves, and you know they they treat others with that same respect.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: And so, you know, it reminds me of the quote from Maya Angelou of you know, I never trust a man who says I love you but doesn't love themselves.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: So I think self-esteem truly does start with loving yourself, you know, and that's how you're able to pour that love into another human being, and that's how that self-esteem shows up through that self-confidence is hey, I'm certain that I love myself, and that allows me to be able to love you as well.
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: And so what can you do?
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: If you, if you already know that the opportunity is for you to love on yourself a little bit more, what are some strategies or what are some techniques that you can put into place?
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: And I think the first and foremost one is once he said it too is just what are the words that you're telling yourself every single day?
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Think about it.
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: You know, when you look in the mirror, oh, I hate my outfit today, or I hate my hair today.
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: Or you know, my makeup is looks terrible, or you know, today is not going to be a good day.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: It's like those words have so much power.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: You know thoughts or things, and so what you're telling yourself in that moment is shaping your reality, and that's not going to do anything to boost yourself esteem.
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: So just invite you to, to maybe even just be aware of that is so powerful in itself.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: We'd like to say that's the goat.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: The gift of awareness today is just to, first and foremost, just be with yourself and see what you're telling yourself, and that you have the opportunity to rewrite that narrative to, instead of, oh I hate my outfit, like, well, the outfit looks pretty good today.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: Or, gosh, my hair looks terrible today.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: Wow, at least I got some good volume in the back.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: So I think that's one strategy that you really want to view quickly is through your lens, what is the narrative, that or the story that you're creating about yourself?
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, and I think once you do that audit on yourself, you know it really can help you show up better instead of your beauty business.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: You know, because when you are able to to really audit that, then you can also start to see.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: You know hey, I wouldn't want to talk to anyone else, you know, and some of the ways that maybe you've talked to yourself in the past or you know you've even heard other people around you talk to themselves or say things about themselves that aren't in a high regard, you know, and so I think really working on that self esteem portion can can not only, you know, foster a positive self image, you know, but it can also create a deeper connection with you and, you know, all of the guests that you serve, whether you're, you know, the salon owner, somebody you know providing services at the front desk, in any area, when you have a high self esteem, it just really does foster an amazing relationship.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: So it's the perfect time to write yourself some love notes on some post-it notes, put them on your mirror, put them in your car, put them as your screensaver.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: You know, just create that space of evaluating yourself and your worth and wow.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: That's when you can really do some incredible things in this world.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Yes, and the next pillar is self respect.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: You know, self respect is such an amazing pillar in when it comes to self confidence and you know, I think you know respect is is really, you know, having a high regard, a feeling of appreciation, you know, and and even just like considering somebody for that appreciation.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: And so when you respect yourself, you know you, you appreciate yourself, you regard yourself in a high standard, you know, and I think that that's such a beautiful thing when it comes to the beauty industry, because I think a lot of times, you know, you can hop on social media and see people acting like they're respecting themselves by tearing other people down.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: You know they'll be like I'm not taking any more late clients, you know, or you're going to pay $5 million, obviously on being dramatic, but you know, I think when you respect yourself, you can pass along a message that might be necessary in a very loving and kind way, you know.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: So if you know, for some reason, somebody you know is hey, we're all going to make mistakes, we're all going to be late, there's going to be unforeseen, unforeseen things that are going to happen, you know.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: But if it's multiple times, you know and you've done everything that you can do on your side to try to help the other person.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: You know, rise to the occasion, you know, also having that self-respect, to say like, hey, you know, I think you're a beautiful person and you know, I think we need to come up with a solution on the other side of this, instead of, you know, just preaching to the whole internet about something that the one person that you want to deliver that message to won't to see.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: You know, and I think that that really truly is rooted in self-respect, when you're not using that platform in that way and you're respecting yourself and everybody around you by delivering a message directly, if that ever needs to be the case.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that you said that because it brought a point to me as like it's self-respect, like you were saying, for yourself, and also self-respect for others, and Sometimes it you can really increase your self-respect and just respect for others when you truly listen and understand what someone else is saying and that goes for yourself too, to listen and Understand what you're saying as well, because, as human beings, were very reactive to agree or disagree Very quickly when something is said, and so to create, create that self-respect of just listening Sometimes has so much power to it, instead of jumping off the gun as someone speaks and saying, oh, I don't agree or disagree with that is just sometimes having that listening ear and looking at it from all perspectives Can create that self-respect, that confidence in so many beautiful ways.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know it is just amazing, if you think about any of you, three Con the, these three pillars to self-confidence.
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: You know, whether it's self-efficacy, self-esteem or self-respect.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: You know, I think they all could create a beautiful world, but I really think self-respect is one of those that, man, if, if we all respected ourselves more, it would naturally help us respect others, like you were just talking about more and, you know, help us kind of release that thought from being right.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: You know, because I think we're all.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: You know, whether it's conditioned as human beings or, you know, it's just kind of innate and a lot of human beings to want to be right in any situation.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: And you know, like you were just mentioning Jin, to be able to just be with somebody in a conversation and hear you know what it's like for them Really is such a respectful thing.
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: You know it's like, hey, you know, I don't believe that my life is more important than yours or or yours is more important than mine, and I want to respect you.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: And you know, sometimes, hey, it's okay to create some boundaries and you know, especially that's why, you know, inside of our salon companies, we have heartbeats.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: You know that can really keep us, you know, headed down, that, that right path of, hey, if we envisioned, you know what it would look like to be the best version of ourselves, and we tried as often as we could to show up as that version of us, you know, and knowing, hey, we're gonna be humans, we're gonna make mistakes.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: But what would that be like, you know?
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: It seems like self-respect, you know, is one of the underlying Things in order to show up in in your salon values and those heartbeats.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: So, you know, I just think it's Great to think about what the world could be like if, you know, more people respected themselves, and because it would just pour out onto others as well.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: I love that.
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: And another point aspect of self respect to is, you know, understanding the importance of setting boundaries to serve you to your highest good, as to know exactly what your purpose and mission is, so that when something comes your way that you know if it's not the right fit for you, that that's okay, it's okay to say no, and understanding that how to maintain that healthy work life integration.
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: And I think that is such a wide open range to, because I feel like that looks a little bit different for everybody.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: It could just be what season of life you're in where you might have a little bit more time at work or you maybe have need a little bit more time at home, and so I think just really understanding that and exploring what's going to be best for you really helps you get that work life integration into balance.
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: That creates what it is that you're looking for.
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that you said that, because I really think a self respecting person can also deliver that with love.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: You know, because it's.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes people can say they might start to create some boundaries and, you know, use it almost in a way, you know, to.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: I don't even think that maybe it's necessarily meant that way, but it can come off that way, in almost an abusive way, like this is how it's going to be, like, you know, it's like with so much frustration, but like if you create those, those boundaries, but it's out of out of self respect.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: You know, love should be the underlying emotion there.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: You know, it's like you love yourself enough to recognize, hey, this is what I need right now, and so you can deliver it in a loving way.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: And so I think, as salon owners, we've been a part of both types of conversations where you know, someone says, hey, I'm in this new season, and they deliver it in a very loving and kind way, or or you are the one who's saying it to another.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: But then I think we've also been a part of the opposite.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: You know, I know I have in the past with you know, different team members who maybe they did need you know some different things, but they weren't able to deliver it with love and it just made me realize, hey, you know, doesn't make you a bad person and that's not it.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: But like in the space that we're trying to create here, you know, I also have to have boundaries to to where, if someone's going to be delivering you know a message to you and I'll not loving and kind way, you know, you need to be able to, to take note of that too as a hey, this isn't what we're trying to create here.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: There's a difference between self respect and, you know, kind of using it as ammunition against another, and so, just being aware of that when you're creating those boundaries, it's really important you know the underlying emotion of anything that you're delivering and just being responsible for the energy that you're creating in any area of your life.
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: I love that, and so the interplay of these three pillars can also be a beautiful opportunity to bring forth at a salon celebration.
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: Because if you're able to, you know, really look at and build yourself confidence as a salon owner and to be able to do that for your team, like wow, that's when you really can create that exceptional guest experience because you have the confidence, you know, you have the self-respect, the self-esteem to really make the guests feel that value.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: And so I think this goes beyond just salon owners too is it is a beautiful tool or technology to talk about with your team as well, because I know that's usually one of the main things that we work on, especially with somebody new in our industry is their confidence or self-confidence, because when they don't have self-confidence, it shows big time and it greatly impacts a lot of aspects of the salon experience.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Yes, I love that you mentioned bringing that up, you know, and somehow in your salon whether it's at a salon celebration or a huddle or whatever it is, you know, I think a great way to do that is, if you do do huddles, you know, at a quick little connection point, to say, hey, you know, today I want to talk about self-efficacy, you know, and just people's belief and their abilities to accomplish something, and have them talk about where they have displayed that in their lives.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: You know, it really can strengthen a person's self-confidence when they remember a time, you know, where they believed in their own abilities to accomplish it.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: You know, I probably wouldn't just stand up and say tell me a time where you were, where you displayed self-efficacy, you know.
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: You really want to break that down and help people understand what it is.
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: You know, and give some examples of yourself, you know, and you know it's a beautiful thing.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: And when they can start to see like, hey, tell me about a time where you displayed, you know, a high self-esteem.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: You know, or where there was a time in your life where you really, you know, liked yourself and loved yourself, and you know what is it, what were you doing.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: You know, kind of help them paint that picture, that vision of what it looks like when they're standing in their highest self-esteem.
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: You know, and same with self-respect, you know, and helping them, you know to understand, hey, like, how do we display self-respect with love?
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: And, you know, still protect our values and our boundaries but also deliver it with love and you know, and really displaying that helps people unlock how they already have all this stuff inside of them.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: It's just calling it forth more and, you know, bringing it to our attention.
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: That really can strengthen that self-confidence.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: And, like Jen mentioned, I think you know self-confidence is the one missing piece for every new stylist inside of our industry that the quicker we can help, you know, draw out someone's greatness, you know, the faster they can reach all of their goals.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: You know whether their goals are making more money, having more time off.
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: You know they want to buy a house, car, whatever, any of their goals are self-confidence and these three pillars of self-confidence are really going to kind of be the roadmap to get them there.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: So you know we're super excited to share these principles of self-confidence.
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: We hope that you take them and to make your life more beautiful.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: And you know, just a quick summary too is remember it's going to be hard for you to build that confidence if you don't have sleep, exercise, loving yourself and food.
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: So keep that in mind, share the love with your team and see what incredible things you can create.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Thanks for tuning in.