Latest / INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living / Delighting in Your Kids and Grandkids Msg 57 - Pastor Chuck Swindoll Insight for Living
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: So much of our lives is spent in serious talk,
- 0:08Speaker 1: serious decisions, dealing with serious events. And I can assure
- 0:17Speaker 1: you those of us engaged in ministry are often dealing
- 0:23Speaker 1: with serious issues. It occurred to me in a series
- 0:29Speaker 1: on the family issue We need a little balance in
- 0:33Speaker 1: this without taking away for a moment the seriousness of
- 0:40Speaker 1: our calling or the importance of our role in the family.
- 0:47Speaker 1: There are times we need simply to lighten up, just
- 0:55Speaker 1: to find delight in our kids and our grandkids. to
- 1:01Speaker 1: look for the happy moments, to find joy and to
- 1:07Speaker 1: create joy in settings that would otherwise be grim and
- 1:14Speaker 1: ultra serious. So I thought today would be an appropriate
- 1:20Speaker 1: time to touch on the subject of delighting in our families.
- 1:29Speaker 1: What's that like? What does that mean? How do we
- 1:34Speaker 1: do that kind of thing? I found joy in noticing
- 1:39Speaker 1: that the Lord delights in us. He doesn't regret making
- 1:48Speaker 1: us or putting us on this planet and using us.
- 1:54Speaker 1: He finds delight in that. Even in correcting us. He
- 2:00Speaker 1: does so, as we will read, because he delights in us.
- 2:06Speaker 1: I want to read for you from both a psalm
- 2:10Speaker 1: and also a chapter, a couple of verses in Proverbs 3.
- 2:18Speaker 1: Turn to Psalm 127. I'm going to read the last
- 2:23Speaker 1: three verses of that psalm. And then we'll look at
- 2:28Speaker 1: Proverbs 3. 11 and 12. I'll be reading from the
- 2:37Speaker 1: New Living Translation. When you find your place, please stand
- 2:42Speaker 1: with me for the reading of the scriptures. First, Psalm 127,
- 2:50Speaker 1: beginning at verse 3. Children are a gift from the Lord.
- 2:58Speaker 1: They are a reward to Children born to a young
- 3:06Speaker 1: man are like arrows in a warrior's hands. How joyful
- 3:13Speaker 1: is the man whose quiver is full of them. Look
- 3:18Speaker 1: at Proverbs chapter 3, verse 11. Next. 311. My child...
- 3:30Speaker 1: Don't reject the Lord's discipline and don't be upset when
- 3:36Speaker 1: he corrects you. For the Lord corrects those he loves.
- 3:44Speaker 1: Just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights.
- 3:52Speaker 1: There's that word again. In whom he delights. For the
- 4:01Speaker 1: next few moments, may we remain standing as we bow
- 4:05Speaker 1: our heads together. On this warm summer day, our Father,
- 4:14Speaker 1: we bring before you our lives, our needs, which are
- 4:21Speaker 1: always many, our concerns, which are often complex and complicated,
- 4:33Speaker 1: And you're always there. You never turn us away. You
- 4:37Speaker 1: never turn your back on us. Every good and perfect
- 4:44Speaker 1: gift is from above and comes from the Father of
- 4:46Speaker 1: lights with whom there is no turning or shadow caused
- 4:54Speaker 1: by turning. Thank you, Father, for your hand on us.
- 5:03Speaker 1: your faithfulness in season, out of season, when it's hot
- 5:10Speaker 1: or when it's cold, when it's daylight or when it's dark,
- 5:15Speaker 1: whether we're young or older, you're there and you haven't changed.
- 5:26Speaker 1: Thank you that you're not only our Lord to guide
- 5:30Speaker 1: us You're our shepherd, and we need you. We need
- 5:39Speaker 1: you regularly to lead us, for we often lose our way.
- 5:48Speaker 1: We're a part of your flock, and we find great
- 5:53Speaker 1: security in that. Thank you for knowing us by name.
- 6:02Speaker 1: And guiding us with such love and care and concern.
- 6:08Speaker 1: I pray that you will use this message today to
- 6:13Speaker 1: lift our hearts out of the drag of this world
- 6:17Speaker 1: in which we live. The darkness. The heartaches. The sadness.
- 6:26Speaker 1: The constant, constant burdens of life. May we realize what
- 6:34Speaker 1: a pleasure children are designed to bring to us. May
- 6:42Speaker 1: we get a new glimpse of the role of parents
- 6:46Speaker 1: as those who take joy in those born to them.
- 6:55Speaker 1: May we who are grandparents realize the fresh dimension you
- 6:59Speaker 1: bring in life. As with age comes wisdom. Thank you
- 7:05Speaker 1: for the privilege of being able to offer that to
- 7:10Speaker 1: the young. May we be patient, caring, devoted, loving. Speak
- 7:29Speaker 1: to us today, Father, as only a shepherd Can speak
- 7:32Speaker 1: to his sheep. We need you. Today especially. There are
- 7:42Speaker 1: those who hurt. There are those who grieve. There are
- 7:48Speaker 1: those who are seriously ill. We remember them. We pray
- 7:56Speaker 1: for you to find. Find ways in their lives to
- 8:00Speaker 1: bring a ray of hope. encouragement, and even refreshment on
- 8:05Speaker 1: this day. Use the words that I've prepared from your
- 8:11Speaker 1: word to open our eyes to see a new dimension
- 8:18Speaker 1: of family life that we may have forgotten about in
- 8:23Speaker 1: the dailiness of responsibilities and the burden and tasks of
- 8:29Speaker 1: making a living. Show us, our Father, that the path
- 8:36Speaker 1: of righteousness is a path that brings pleasure forevermore. Now
- 8:45Speaker 1: as you speak to us, Lord, we tell you how
- 8:51Speaker 1: much we love you. And we lean on you. We
- 8:57Speaker 1: trust you. We wait upon you. There are needs that
- 9:05Speaker 1: have not been met, and without you, we cannot know
- 9:10Speaker 1: how they will ever turn out. So step in, Lord,
- 9:16Speaker 1: and take charge, we pray, that there might be relief
- 9:22Speaker 1: and a fresh sense of hope. Now encourage us, our Father,
- 9:29Speaker 1: as we pause for a few quiet moments. to listen
- 9:34Speaker 1: to beautiful music, to search our own hearts, so that
- 9:40Speaker 1: as the seed of the word is sown, our hearts
- 9:44Speaker 1: will be like fertile soil, receiving the seed, allowing it
- 9:50Speaker 1: to be implanted, to take root, to grow, and to produce.
- 9:59Speaker 1: In the name of Christ. our Savior, our Lord, our Shepherd,
- 10:07Speaker 1: we pray. All God's people said, Amen. You may be seated.
- 10:16Speaker 1: Many years ago, Cynthia and I had a Bible study
- 10:20Speaker 1: in our home with about eight couples in all. We
- 10:26Speaker 1: were much younger then. We all were about the same
- 10:32Speaker 1: age and were all in the same stage of life
- 10:36Speaker 1: as we were having our families and beginning our lives
- 10:42Speaker 1: in growing children in our home. It was a wonderful study.
- 10:49Speaker 1: We met for 12 weeks in our little living room,
- 10:53Speaker 1: and it was pretty full with all those couples. And
- 10:59Speaker 1: all of us Christians, all of us together, involved in
- 11:02Speaker 1: our church where we were at the time. We knew
- 11:07Speaker 1: each other well, but as you know, in a Bible study,
- 11:11Speaker 1: you get to know each other very well. It occurred
- 11:16Speaker 1: to me, as we had met for several weeks by then,
- 11:21Speaker 1: to ask a question that was a probing question, designed
- 11:30Speaker 1: first to make each one of us think, and then
- 11:35Speaker 1: to be painfully honest in our response. This is what
- 11:41Speaker 1: I asked all of them. Looking back, would you say
- 11:47Speaker 1: that the home in which you were raised was a
- 11:53Speaker 1: fun place to grow up? Were you loved? Were you accepted?
- 12:02Speaker 1: Was there lots of laughter? And did you sense that
- 12:06Speaker 1: your mom and dad delighted in you? Then I waited
- 12:14Speaker 1: and gave them a few moments to think about it.
- 12:20Speaker 1: Then I asked them if they wouldn't mind if this
- 12:24Speaker 1: were true of them to raise their hands. Of the
- 12:30Speaker 1: 16 young adults in our living room, two raised their hands,
- 12:38Speaker 1: one of the two reluctantly. That led, as you can imagine,
- 12:46Speaker 1: to quite a discussion and a lot of tears. But
- 12:58Speaker 1: that was then. This is now. So, let me ask
- 13:06Speaker 1: you the same question without the raising of hands. Simply
- 13:12Speaker 1: ponder the question. Think seriously about it as you go
- 13:18Speaker 1: back to your original home where you were reared. Spend
- 13:26Speaker 1: a few moments reliving it. Was it a healthy and
- 13:31Speaker 1: wholesome and happy setting? Did you feel more often than
- 13:39Speaker 1: not that your mom and dad delighted in you? Was
- 13:48Speaker 1: there the fun, the sound of laughter in your home
- 13:54Speaker 1: often as you were growing up? Delighting in our children.
- 14:06Speaker 1: What a difference that word can make. We don't use
- 14:12Speaker 1: it very much when we think of rearing children. As
- 14:20Speaker 1: an example, if you look again at Proverbs 3, verse 12,
- 14:26Speaker 1: you'll find the word, as a father corrects a child
- 14:32Speaker 1: in whom he delights. Isn't that an interesting context? Here
- 14:40Speaker 1: is a father correcting a child because he delights in him.
- 14:52Speaker 1: When children are neglected, they're not corrected. They're not guided
- 14:59Speaker 1: with wise reproof. They're left pretty much on their own.
- 15:07Speaker 1: And what an insecure feeling that is. But when parents
- 15:13Speaker 1: care enough to confront, to correct, knowing that if this
- 15:21Speaker 1: kind of attitude or action were to continue on unaddressed,
- 15:30Speaker 1: it would work against the child as he or she
- 15:34Speaker 1: grows up. Needs to be corrected. And you do so
- 15:39Speaker 1: because you delight in them. You find pleasure in their presence.
- 15:48Speaker 1: You'll be interested to know, as I was, that But
- 15:51Speaker 1: the Hebrew term is colorful. It means to be pleased with,
- 16:00Speaker 1: to find favor in. It's used elsewhere in the Old
- 16:06Speaker 1: Testament for acceptance and even enjoyment. Trust me on this.
- 16:17Speaker 1: When a child feels accepted and enjoyed by his parents,
- 16:23Speaker 1: it makes a world of difference in his sense of
- 16:28Speaker 1: security or her sense of security. And there's nothing like
- 16:37Speaker 1: having fun with our kids and taking the time to
- 16:42Speaker 1: do so. It requires breaking with the old mold of
- 16:54Speaker 1: every minute counts, so we've got to stay serious about life.
- 16:58Speaker 1: One young man put it in these words, this is
- 17:02Speaker 1: the age of the half-read page and the quick hash
- 17:06Speaker 1: and the mad dash, the bright night with the nerves tight,
- 17:13Speaker 1: the plane hop with a brief stop, the lamp tan
- 17:17Speaker 1: in a short span. the big shot in a good
- 17:22Speaker 1: spot and the brain strain and the heart pain and
- 17:28Speaker 1: the catnaps till the spring snaps and the fun is gone.
- 17:38Speaker 1: And the fun is gone. Speaking of having fun, I
- 17:45Speaker 1: came across a marvelous true story about a family in
- 17:49Speaker 1: Alabama several years ago with a very creative, fun-loving father.
- 17:57Speaker 1: They owned a little tent camper that they were going
- 18:00Speaker 1: to take a trip with, and they were going to
- 18:02Speaker 1: go from Alabama all the way out to California and
- 18:06Speaker 1: stop at several places, of course, along the way to
- 18:09Speaker 1: camp and to relax together, have fun together, spend nights
- 18:14Speaker 1: out under the stars. special route they were going to take,
- 18:18Speaker 1: and then when they got out west, they would stop
- 18:21Speaker 1: at several significant places that they had looked forward to
- 18:25Speaker 1: going to before they made the turn and came back
- 18:28Speaker 1: to their home. Regrettably, toward the end of their planning,
- 18:33Speaker 1: which they had put together very carefully and well, the
- 18:36Speaker 1: father told them that his business was such that he
- 18:41Speaker 1: wasn't able to go with them. But he wanted them
- 18:44Speaker 1: to go ahead without him, and and to have fun
- 18:47Speaker 1: along the way. And so he made sure, as they
- 18:51Speaker 1: sat down with the map, that they would map out
- 18:53Speaker 1: each part of the route they would take, every place
- 18:57Speaker 1: they would stop, even some places they would eat that
- 19:00Speaker 1: they were familiar with. And dragging that little tent camper
- 19:06Speaker 1: along the way, he talked about the fun they would have,
- 19:09Speaker 1: and he'd miss them, but they could talk together from
- 19:14Speaker 1: time to time. He hugged and kissed them goodbye and
- 19:19Speaker 1: waved as they left out the driveway. Interesting, it was
- 19:24Speaker 1: what he didn't tell them that was the best part
- 19:27Speaker 1: of the plan. See, he didn't have to work. He
- 19:31Speaker 1: bought a one-way ticket to fly to one of the
- 19:35Speaker 1: towns he knew they would be going through. So he
- 19:38Speaker 1: landed there, took a cab out to the edge of town,
- 19:43Speaker 1: sat down on his backpack and his sleeping bag and
- 19:46Speaker 1: waited for his vehicle in the distance to come by.
- 19:50Speaker 1: Had a wide grin on his face, and he saw
- 19:55Speaker 1: the car, and he stood up with his thumb, hitchhiking.
- 20:01Speaker 1: Could you imagine the kids? Hey, mom, that's dad! That's dad!
- 20:06Speaker 1: Could you imagine the They'd remember that more than any
- 20:10Speaker 1: place they went on the trip. What a great guy.
- 20:14Speaker 1: Somebody asked him later on, what would make you go
- 20:18Speaker 1: to all that trouble and expense to do that kind
- 20:23Speaker 1: of trick on your family? He said, well, someday I'm
- 20:28Speaker 1: going to die. And I want him to remember a
- 20:32Speaker 1: dad who was fun to live with. Whoever once in
- 20:39Speaker 1: a while surprised them with something they never would ever
- 20:44Speaker 1: have expected. I love that story. He delighted in his children.
- 20:53Speaker 1: He spent time thinking about a way to build into
- 20:58Speaker 1: their museum of memories such a permanent reminder that they
- 21:05Speaker 1: would never forget Dad on the side of the road
- 21:09Speaker 1: hitching a ride. I would have thought, what if they
- 21:12Speaker 1: had taken another route and gone south of there? You
- 21:16Speaker 1: know me, the practical guy. No, he had made it
- 21:20Speaker 1: very clear. You take this route, that's where you're going
- 21:23Speaker 1: to be. And on this day, this is where you're
- 21:25Speaker 1: going to be. When you delight in your family, you
- 21:33Speaker 1: love moments like that. The laughter is as big a
- 21:39Speaker 1: memory as anything. I've often said I want the kids
- 21:46Speaker 1: to remember me as the dad who threw their mother
- 21:48Speaker 1: in the pool and lived to tell the story. Throwing
- 21:54Speaker 1: her in the pool is not a big thing. Living
- 21:56Speaker 1: to tell the story is a big thing. Fun in
- 22:00Speaker 1: your family. We did it last night. Had a number
- 22:03Speaker 1: of our family members over, sat around the kitchen table,
- 22:07Speaker 1: and without any agenda, whatever, told stories, laughed, had a
- 22:14Speaker 1: little Kentucky fried chicken together, and little soft drinks, and
- 22:21Speaker 1: sat around till night fell. Everybody laughed with a smile
- 22:27Speaker 1: on their faces, and we sat down in our favorite
- 22:32Speaker 1: chairs in the family room and went over the memory
- 22:37Speaker 1: of last night. One among many, we hope our kids
- 22:43Speaker 1: will never forget. They're not all around, but you take
- 22:47Speaker 1: what you have and you make the most of it.
- 22:51Speaker 1: And what a great time it was. I love that
- 22:57Speaker 1: story because it reminds me of the kind of thing
- 23:03Speaker 1: you can plan When you think outside the box and
- 23:06Speaker 1: you take time to have a little fun. Let me
- 23:17Speaker 1: show you something from the psalm we read. We may
- 23:21Speaker 1: have read it over so quickly you missed the analogies.
- 23:25Speaker 1: There are three of them worth noting. Psalm 127 begins
- 23:31Speaker 1: with children are a gift from the Lord. Stop right there.
- 23:39Speaker 1: A gift from the Lord. Last time we were together,
- 23:46Speaker 1: we talked about how children are formed in the womb,
- 23:50Speaker 1: and the Lord makes the child during that nine-month period,
- 23:57Speaker 1: giving the child certain interests and inclinations, certain skills. certain abilities.
- 24:05Speaker 1: And then when the birth comes, it's like he's wrapped
- 24:10Speaker 1: a ribbon around the child with a little bow saying,
- 24:15Speaker 1: here's my gift. Now, the child is a gift, not
- 24:21Speaker 1: a liability. The child comes as a gift, not an accident.
- 24:29Speaker 1: Your child comes into your home as a gift, not
- 24:32Speaker 1: an interruption. as a gift, not merely a tax deduction,
- 24:39Speaker 1: not a burden to bear, but a gift to open
- 24:46Speaker 1: and delight in. And notice the giver. No one else
- 24:54Speaker 1: gives you the child, but the one who has made
- 24:57Speaker 1: the child, the Lord. Made by God, given by God.
- 25:08Speaker 1: I wonder if your child realizes what a treasure she
- 25:15Speaker 1: is to you and to your partner in life. I
- 25:21Speaker 1: wonder if your son is growing up remembering, my folks
- 25:27Speaker 1: thought of me as a gift, a treasured gift. We
- 25:34Speaker 1: read the scriptures too hurriedly. We don't marinate the words
- 25:41Speaker 1: by taking time with them. The next analogy is equally valuable.
- 25:51Speaker 1: They are a reward from him. A reward from I
- 26:00Speaker 1: looked up the word reward in the dictionary. Webster tells
- 26:05Speaker 1: us that the term means a satisfying result. What a
- 26:13Speaker 1: difference that makes in children when they realize how the
- 26:17Speaker 1: Lord has satisfied us by bringing them into our lives.
- 26:24Speaker 1: And there are moments along the way in life when
- 26:26Speaker 1: we pause and and let them know how special they
- 26:30Speaker 1: are to us. Benjamin West was an artist in England
- 26:36Speaker 1: and a good one, well known. On one occasion while
- 26:42Speaker 1: growing up, his mother left him in charge of his
- 26:47Speaker 1: little sister Sally. And when she was gone, Benjamin noticed
- 26:55Speaker 1: in a drawer some bottles of colored ink, permanent ink,
- 27:00Speaker 1: of course. He got the bottles out, and he got
- 27:04Speaker 1: a brush, and he had Sally sit there, and on
- 27:09Speaker 1: the wall of his house, he began to paint Sally,
- 27:14Speaker 1: a nice portrait framed between this door and this window
- 27:20Speaker 1: on the wall. When his mother came home, of course,
- 27:25Speaker 1: she looked past the mess and saw the picture and said, why, Benjamin,
- 27:31Speaker 1: it's Sally. She's beautiful. And she reached down and kissed him.
- 27:39Speaker 1: From that day on, Benjamin West said, my mother's kiss
- 27:44Speaker 1: made me an artist. I know, I know. It was messy.
- 27:52Speaker 1: Artists are messy. And there was probably ink that stained.
- 27:59Speaker 1: But unless I missed my guess, Mrs. West left that
- 28:04Speaker 1: picture on the wall until the day of her death.
- 28:08Speaker 1: What a treasure. What a reward. What is your child's gift?
- 28:19Speaker 1: What is her inclination? What is she excited about? She's
- 28:29Speaker 1: a reward, something that brings satisfaction. The third is equally intriguing.
- 28:40Speaker 1: Children are like arrows in a warrior's hands. Look at that.
- 28:49Speaker 1: We're not too familiar with arrows, unless you're an archer,
- 28:52Speaker 1: and most of us aren't. So we have to read
- 28:57Speaker 1: about them to learn about them. Arrows, well, they are
- 29:10Speaker 1: invaluable for a warrior in order for him to survive
- 29:14Speaker 1: a battle. They're invaluable. Furthermore, they must be handled with
- 29:21Speaker 1: care or damage could happen. Third, and of course perhaps
- 29:29Speaker 1: the most important, they must be directed toward a specific
- 29:35Speaker 1: target for their purpose to be fulfilled. But this isn't
- 29:43Speaker 1: talking about literal arrows and literal warriors. This is picturesque
- 29:49Speaker 1: language designed to make us imagine. Happy is the one
- 29:58Speaker 1: whose quiver is full of those arrows. Happy. Because the
- 30:06Speaker 1: quiver is full of arrows. We launch them straight towards
- 30:13Speaker 1: specific goals that are important to them. Because we've studied
- 30:22Speaker 1: them to see how they're put together. and having concentrated
- 30:28Speaker 1: on them and given them the hours of time that requires,
- 30:34Speaker 1: our time has been invested well. The Lazy Bee Ranch
- 30:44Speaker 1: is comprised of 260 square miles of scrub brush on
- 30:53Speaker 1: the New Mexico-Arizona border. It's been in the Day family
- 30:59Speaker 1: since 1881. When Harry and Ada May Day were ready
- 31:07Speaker 1: to have their first child, they had to travel over
- 31:12Speaker 1: 200 miles east in order to get to El Paso,
- 31:21Speaker 1: where Ada May would give birth to her daughter, whom
- 31:26Speaker 1: she named The home she took Sandra back to in
- 31:34Speaker 1: their pickup truck was a rugged place. It was a
- 31:38Speaker 1: four-room adobe cabin. No running water. No electricity. No school
- 31:52Speaker 1: within even driving distance. Sandra's future may have seemed slim
- 32:05Speaker 1: to an onlooker, but it was anything but with parents
- 32:08Speaker 1: like Harry and Ada Mae. With such limited resources, they
- 32:15Speaker 1: decided to supplement them. Harry and Ada Mae delighted in
- 32:23Speaker 1: their daughter. They didn't allow their dreams to be limited
- 32:27Speaker 1: by their surroundings. They refused to give up hope that
- 32:33Speaker 1: Sandra would one day attend and graduate from Stanford University
- 32:40Speaker 1: in Palo Alto, California. Ada Mae not only homeschooled her
- 32:48Speaker 1: daughter and later her son, Alan, she also subscribed to
- 32:54Speaker 1: metropolitan newspapers and newspapers Magazines such as Vogue and The
- 33:02Speaker 1: New Yorker, which she regularly read to her children. They
- 33:12Speaker 1: also made sure that Sandra attended the best boarding school
- 33:16Speaker 1: they could afford when she reached the age where it
- 33:20Speaker 1: was appropriate for her to do that. Alan tells that
- 33:26Speaker 1: when one summer arrived, The parents packed them in the
- 33:31Speaker 1: old station wagon and they drove to every state capital
- 33:37Speaker 1: west of the Mississippi. We climbed to the dome of
- 33:43Speaker 1: every building until finally we had to come home. Alan
- 33:48Speaker 1: writes in his story. Sandra did go to Stanford and
- 33:54Speaker 1: she did graduate. She then went on to law school.
- 34:01Speaker 1: And eventually, beyond her law practice, she became the first
- 34:05Speaker 1: woman Supreme Court Justice of the United States. On the
- 34:10Speaker 1: day of her swearing in, the entire Day family, of course,
- 34:15Speaker 1: was present to rejoice with her. During the ceremony, Alan
- 34:22Speaker 1: watched her closely as Sandra Day O'Connor put on the
- 34:26Speaker 1: judge's robe and took her seat. Among the justices. She
- 34:33Speaker 1: then looked around the room. And spotted her family. Writes Alan.
- 34:40Speaker 1: Their eyes locked together. He said. And that's when the tears.
- 34:49Speaker 1: Started falling. You see. He. The family demonstrates beautifully that
- 35:01Speaker 1: circumstances have little to do with the direction those arrows go.
- 35:09Speaker 1: It's those people within those four-room houses that make the difference.
- 35:17Speaker 1: Sandra doesn't remember the lack of electricity or the absence
- 35:21Speaker 1: of running water. She remembers a mother who read to
- 35:25Speaker 1: her daily broadened her world with stories far removed from
- 35:34Speaker 1: New Mexico and Arizona border and that ranch where they lived.
- 35:43Speaker 1: She remembered parents, as did Alan, who took time. And
- 35:50Speaker 1: the fun they had, can you imagine? Can you imagine
- 35:53Speaker 1: climbing the domes of every Capitol building? They could... They
- 35:58Speaker 1: could squeeze into the time they could be away from
- 36:02Speaker 1: one state to another. You may choose to take your
- 36:08Speaker 1: son to, I have a friend who has two sons,
- 36:12Speaker 1: and one of his goals is to take them to
- 36:14Speaker 1: every one of the Major League Baseball stadiums before they're
- 36:19Speaker 1: out of the house, on their way. What a great idea.
- 36:25Speaker 1: Some would choose the football stadiums where the professional players
- 36:36Speaker 1: play from one stadium to another. Not so much to
- 36:39Speaker 1: see the game, though that might be a part of it,
- 36:41Speaker 1: but to just be in the stadium. The possibilities are
- 36:48Speaker 1: endless if you want to have fun with them and
- 36:53Speaker 1: you want to build into them a life beyond the
- 36:56Speaker 1: the tight circumstances of your home. For our closing scripture,
- 37:07Speaker 1: I want to summarize the passage for you. I think
- 37:11Speaker 1: it will land more firmly in your mind by my
- 37:16Speaker 1: doing so. I'm referring to what Paul wrote in tender
- 37:21Speaker 1: moments to people who meant so much to him. He
- 37:25Speaker 1: delighted in the Thessalonians. Interesting, the Thessalonians. If you know
- 37:30Speaker 1: your Bible history, you know that Paul came to Philippi
- 37:36Speaker 1: when he crossed the Aegean and then made his way
- 37:39Speaker 1: down Macedonia till he got to Greece. But on the
- 37:43Speaker 1: way down, he stopped at Thessalonica for a little while,
- 37:47Speaker 1: not long, and then briefly at Berea and then came
- 37:51Speaker 1: through Athens and then on to Corinth where he spent
- 37:56Speaker 1: more time. Thessalonica. Paul writes to them later following his
- 38:05Speaker 1: time with them and he's remembering when. And if I
- 38:11Speaker 1: may use the word, he's delighting in the memory. He
- 38:17Speaker 1: says in 1 Thessalonians 2, 5 through 12, verse 5,
- 38:23Speaker 1: I never tried to win you with flattery. Listen to
- 38:28Speaker 1: these words of delight. I never tried to win you
- 38:31Speaker 1: with flattery. I didn't pretend to be a friend and
- 38:36Speaker 1: to rip you off financially. I was never a freeloader.
- 38:43Speaker 1: I worked When I was with you. But my the
- 38:49Speaker 1: times we had together. Verse 6. I didn't seek praise
- 38:54Speaker 1: from you or from others. I wasn't there to get
- 38:56Speaker 1: the glory. I was there for you. Verse 7. I
- 39:02Speaker 1: never demanded anything from you. But I became like a mother.
- 39:08Speaker 1: Get that analogy. Feeding and caring for her own children.
- 39:13Speaker 1: Verse 8. We love you so much that we share
- 39:17Speaker 1: not only God's good news, but our very own lives.
- 39:21Speaker 1: I love that phrase. That's a phrase that refers to vulnerability.
- 39:27Speaker 1: When I was with you, I... allowed you to see
- 39:30Speaker 1: the scars of my past. I spoke of the regret
- 39:37Speaker 1: of my life when I spent my days chasing down
- 39:41Speaker 1: Christians when I was lost, when I ran with the Pharisees.
- 39:47Speaker 1: When I was on my way to Damascus to hunt
- 39:49Speaker 1: down more, to imprison them, and if possible, to see
- 39:54Speaker 1: to their deaths. He shared his very life with them.
- 39:58Speaker 1: They got to know the real Paul. It's beautiful as
- 40:01Speaker 1: he describes the tenderness of sharing his very life with them.
- 40:06Speaker 1: You do that with those you delight in. Do your
- 40:09Speaker 1: children know your story? Do they know your scars? Do
- 40:16Speaker 1: they know the terrible mistakes you made and the things
- 40:19Speaker 1: you learned from them? They welded themselves to parents when
- 40:28Speaker 1: parents allowed them to enter into their own struggles. The
- 40:32Speaker 1: lessons they learned. The failures of their past. I shared
- 40:39Speaker 1: with you my very life. We worked hard among you.
- 40:44Speaker 1: We were diligent. We were never a burden to anyone.
- 40:49Speaker 1: Verse 10, we were devout and honest. He even uses
- 40:52Speaker 1: the word faultless. When he looks back on those couple
- 40:56Speaker 1: of weeks he was with the Thessalonians, people, they could
- 41:01Speaker 1: not find fault in what he did with them. We
- 41:07Speaker 1: treated each of you as a father treats his own children.
- 41:11Speaker 1: We pleaded with you. We encouraged you. We urged you
- 41:14Speaker 1: to live lives in a God-honoring manner. Those are great words.
- 41:19Speaker 1: Did you miss the bookends? Like a mother, as a father,
- 41:26Speaker 1: we poured ourselves into you. Can you imagine the Thessalonians
- 41:32Speaker 1: when they're reading the letter from Paul, pausing and probably
- 41:38Speaker 1: with tears remembering, weren't those great? Weren't those great days
- 41:45Speaker 1: when that man was with us? Weren't those delightful days?
- 41:53Speaker 1: Like a mother, like a father. When I began this message,
- 42:03Speaker 1: I spoke of a Bible class we had in our
- 42:06Speaker 1: home today. I did the figuring between the two services today.
- 42:10Speaker 1: That was about 55 years ago. We've now had our children.
- 42:19Speaker 1: We lost two in the process. Two miscarriages, precious lives
- 42:27Speaker 1: that God chose not to grant us, made us love
- 42:31Speaker 1: the ones we had all the more. A boy on
- 42:35Speaker 1: each end and girls in the middle. They're now in
- 42:38Speaker 1: their 50s. Our oldest is past 60. They were so
- 42:45Speaker 1: little back in the days when we had that Bible study.
- 42:48Speaker 1: We didn't even have Chuck yet. He wasn't even born.
- 42:51Speaker 1: We had only three. And I thought about the years.
- 43:01Speaker 1: I thought about Papa On the roof in Fiddler, sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset,
- 43:11Speaker 1: swiftly fly the years, one season following another, laden with
- 43:18Speaker 1: happiness and tears. I wonder what our kids will say
- 43:27Speaker 1: about our home as they were growing up. Not an
- 43:33Speaker 1: easy place to grow up in a minister's family. Your
- 43:42Speaker 1: home may not have been an easy place to grow up,
- 43:45Speaker 1: but you know what? We were determined to be different
- 43:49Speaker 1: from the families in which we were born and raised.
- 43:53Speaker 1: We wanted to have more laughter, more fun. Memories are
- 43:59Speaker 1: built around fun. We determined early on that that would
- 44:07Speaker 1: be what we would have for our family. Remember that
- 44:12Speaker 1: little Bible study determining some of those things because we
- 44:19Speaker 1: realized children learn what they live with. As one woman wrote,
- 44:29Speaker 1: if a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.
- 44:36Speaker 1: If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.
- 44:44Speaker 1: If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.
- 44:47Speaker 1: If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.
- 44:58Speaker 1: If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.
- 45:05Speaker 1: If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence. If
- 45:13Speaker 1: a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate. If
- 45:19Speaker 1: a child lives with fairness, he learns justice. If a
- 45:25Speaker 1: child lives with security, he learns to have faith. If
- 45:33Speaker 1: a child lives with approval, He learns to like himself.
- 45:41Speaker 1: And if a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he
- 45:46Speaker 1: learns to find love in the world. It's missing, folks.
- 45:58Speaker 1: It's missing. Ours is a world of rage. No patience. Anger.
- 46:14Speaker 1: Vile words. Harsh responses. No forgiveness. Ugly reactions. Violence. Murder.
- 46:37Speaker 1: Even slaughter. Something's wrong in the home where those people
- 46:50Speaker 1: grew up. Think. Ponder. You say, well, my family's grown.
- 47:03Speaker 1: Your grandparents? When we had our time with family last evening,
- 47:12Speaker 1: we were not only with children, we were with grandchildren.
- 47:15Speaker 1: What a privilege. What an opportunity. And it's so much
- 47:24Speaker 1: easier when you're grandparents. Have you noticed? Yeah. Only the
- 47:32Speaker 1: worst of a child would be disrespectful of a grandparent.
- 47:40Speaker 1: Some these days shoot their grandparents. Please, please listen to me.
- 47:57Speaker 1: This isn't a sermon. This is a message from God
- 48:02Speaker 1: for all of us. We need it. This world is
- 48:10Speaker 1: going to hell in a handbasket. We've lost our way.
- 48:15Speaker 1: Even the leaders of this country have lost their way.
- 48:20Speaker 1: Wonder how they were raised. Children learn what they live with.
- 48:30Speaker 1: What are they living with in your homes? This is
- 48:39Speaker 1: your move. You're the parents. You're the grandparents. Doesn't matter
- 48:47Speaker 1: what the age of your children are, maybe. It doesn't
- 48:51Speaker 1: matter where you live. Doesn't matter what your income is.
- 48:54Speaker 1: Doesn't not matter. You live in a four-room adobe hut
- 49:00Speaker 1: on a scrub brush ranch? No, you don't. Wherever you live,
- 49:06Speaker 1: whatever the circumstance, Think about it. Bring back the fun.
- 49:16Speaker 1: Take time. You'll never regret it. On your dying day,
- 49:26Speaker 1: you won't think, why wasn't I at the office more?
- 49:32Speaker 1: You'll think, why wasn't I with my family more? When
- 49:43Speaker 1: we delight in our children and our grandchildren, we care
- 49:47Speaker 1: about what they live with. So when we're gone, they
- 49:54Speaker 1: will have learned what's healthy and wholesome, respectful and right.
- 50:04Speaker 1: And by the way, if I may, talking to them
- 50:11Speaker 1: about Jesus, piece of cake when you delight in them.
- 50:22Speaker 1: They want to know everything that's made you so easy
- 50:27Speaker 1: to be with. And that starts with Jesus. You know
- 50:37Speaker 1: what's interesting? When Jesus chose his twelve, Mark 3, 14.
- 50:47Speaker 1: He selected the twelve to be with him and then
- 50:54Speaker 1: to send him forth to preach. Note the order. To
- 51:00Speaker 1: be with him and then to send him forth. To
- 51:06Speaker 1: be with him and then to send him out. Home
- 51:15Speaker 1: is where children are with us. And then they're gone.
- 51:22Speaker 1: We've heard it all our lives. Love them while you've
- 51:25Speaker 1: got them because they'll be gone before you know it.
- 51:32Speaker 1: If you still have them under your roof, delight in them.
- 51:40Speaker 1: Delight in them. Tell them about the cross and the
- 51:47Speaker 1: difference that's made in your life. Or if you don't
- 51:52Speaker 1: have that open door, start with an apology for missing
- 51:59Speaker 1: so much along the way that you've blocked an interest
- 52:05Speaker 1: they may have had in Jesus. Start there. Most kids
- 52:17Speaker 1: I know, unless they're now twisted beyond repair, are willing
- 52:22Speaker 1: to forgive us. I'll tell you, Cynthia and I have
- 52:28Speaker 1: done our share of apologizing, and we needed to. And
- 52:35Speaker 1: you know what? No problem with being forgiven. That's another
- 52:47Speaker 1: story for another time. I want you to leave this
- 52:55Speaker 1: room today with these things on your mind. Because I'm
- 53:04Speaker 1: talking to you on behalf of your family. I've asked
- 53:19Speaker 1: John Dill to play Find Us Faithful. It's a song
- 53:25Speaker 1: about memories and remembering one's past. A parent has written
- 53:41Speaker 1: the song and it's saying, When all of life has
- 53:48Speaker 1: run its course and is all over and done with,
- 53:56Speaker 1: that's all they'll have is memories. Make them great memories.
- 54:07Speaker 1: Make them great. Thank you, Father, for communicating to all
- 54:16Speaker 1: of us today in this all-important subject of delighting in
- 54:23Speaker 1: our children. I thank you that you have delighted in us,
- 54:31Speaker 1: so much so that you poured out your grace, and
- 54:35Speaker 1: you've shown us your love, and you've never once turned
- 54:41Speaker 1: your back on us, and you care deeply about those
- 54:50Speaker 1: things in our lives that we struggle with. It's hard
- 54:57Speaker 1: to cut a new course, but I pray for those
- 55:01Speaker 1: parents and grandparents today that need to do so. May
- 55:07Speaker 1: we stop the journey that's been going in the wrong
- 55:15Speaker 1: direction long enough And from this day on, find us
- 55:22Speaker 1: faithful as we delight in our children and grandchildren. In
- 55:33Speaker 1: Jesus' name, everyone said, Amen. so so Thank you. The
- 57:23Speaker 1: preceding message....
- 57:50Speaker 2: Delighting in Your Kids and Grandkids was copyrighted in 2022
- 57:54Speaker 2: and 2023, and the sound recording was copyrighted in 2023
- 58:00Speaker 2: by Charles R.
- 58:01Speaker 1: Swindoll, Inc. All rights are reserved worldwide.
- 58:06Speaker 2: Duplication of copyrighted material for commercial use is strictly prohibited.