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The shift in weight loss culture with PFN Dietitian, Stacy (part 2) · SAY GRACE | Weight Loss + Health for Overwhelmed Women- Stress, Busy, Consistency, Realistic, Motivation, Starting Over, No Restrictions

0:40
All right, y'all, welcome back to part two of my episode with Stacey,
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our team dietitian on weight loss culture and how things have shifted over the years.
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Today, we're going to dive a little deeper into topics like social media and
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AI and just how the things that we consume and see really do have an effect
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on our expectation of ourselves and maybe even our expectation of others.
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I'm also going to dive deep in why rest matters, why what we do with our white
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space in the day matters and how it can truly affect our weight loss. So here we go.
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Makes sense. It does. We're going deep here. We are going deep.
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I love it. I love it. I will say, so I am in a few like Facebook groups.
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This happened over the weekend and it, I mean, I got really emotional about it.
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It, so usually, okay, so when people comment, like, I mean, people ask about
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weight loss all the time, right?
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And so usually one of our clients will tag me or tagged the page.
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And so then I'll go in there and I'll look at it and I'll comment or whatever.
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But this one, people did end up like commenting, but I saw it before like anybody
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had said, had tagged me or whatever.
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And so this girl posted and it was like this really long post.
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And she was like, I just started on a GLP-1 because like I've got to do something
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about my weight. I'm a binge eater.
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And what set me over, like what kind of pushed me into finally doing this,
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like getting on the GLP-1 is because my, it was her husband or boyfriend, I don't know,
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he videoed her binging.
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So like she was in the car and
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was binging and he was looking out the window and saw her and videoed it.
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And like, he wasn't doing it. I don't, I mean, I don't think it was like a spite
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thing or like, I don't think he even thought a thing about it.
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You know, like he thought, I'm sure he loves her just how she is, you know what I mean?
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But he, he thought like he noticed the binge, like, you know, how.
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Jess and I were talking about it yesterday, like how sometimes when people binge,
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they eat, They eat really, really fast, you know, and so I guess he noticed
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because he in the video, he was like, she hungry, you know, like,
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you know, and so he videoed it kind of being funny.
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But for her, that was like the mark of shame, like, you know,
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because he videoed it and it just she was looking at herself,
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you know, in her her biggest pit.
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But like the thing she's most shameful about, then now she has it on video to
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watch over and over again.
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So anyway, she was like, I need to know how to stop this.
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Like the GLP one is helping me with the food noise. But I know as soon as I
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come off of this, I'm going to go back to binging.
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So I'm reading this and I'm like, this is just such a prime example of how like
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this to me is a reason that social media,
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I don't know, there's a good, there's a good and their bad to this scenario
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for me because people were commenting things like,
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get a dietitian, start tracking your calories.
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I just take, I just take my clothes off and look at myself in the mirror until
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I'm so disgusted that I don't want to eat. Yes. Okay.
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So I'm reading this, like this girl has a binge eating disorder. You know what I mean?
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Like tracking her calories and you and I know this, right?
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Like we have had so many clients with, with binge eating disorders like
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oh yeah and and they'll they'll work
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it really hard right we won't know nobody signs
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up with us and is like oh by the way i'm a binge eater you know what i mean
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and so they just think something's wrong with them and so they'll work it really
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hard for like a month or whatever and then they'll fall off the radar right
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and so unless they share that with us and then we're able to like help, you know,
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help guide them into resources for this.
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But it's like, those responses are from people who did not understand a binge eating disorder.
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You know, like you don't know, you just, you are a person who maybe needs to
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lose some weight, right?
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And I'm not, but like, those are very different realities.
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Like, like that person's reality of food is very different from like mine and your reality of food.
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You know what I mean? Like, it's a very different thing. And I'm like,
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oh my God, this is like a trauma response.
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And this is, you know, she needs to get a therapist. And, you know, I'm reading it as like.
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Because it is, like, that is an eating disorder.
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Eating disorders are not just, I can't, like, the french fries smell so good, I can't stop.
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Like, it's so much more and so much deeper than that.
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And so I'm reading this thinking, like, if this girl is reading some of these
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comments, and these people are saying to her, like, just track your calories,
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just look at yourself in the mirror.
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It's like you don't understand her history. You don't understand her struggles.
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Like you don't understand her enough to offer that kind of like advice as if
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it's just easy peasy, lemon squeezy, you know.
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Because those people need help just as much as she does. Like if they're pointing
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the finger and saying those things.
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I mean, it's comparing apples to apples, kind of.
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I mean, right. But it's like, but that, so then I'm like thinking,
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okay, and then there's all these other people that are probably reading these
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comments. And there's other people that probably have this same struggle.
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I don't know. I just, I got so like in it.
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But anyway, the good side, in my opinion, is like she did, I mean,
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she put it out there like bravely to let all these other women know like, oh, I'm not alone.
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I don't think that was her intention. I think she was really looking for help and advice and wisdom.
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And there were a lot of people in the comments that did say things like,
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you know, get a therapist, that kind of stuff.
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And I was one of them. I mean, I spent a lot of time on like a Saturday afternoon
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over here, which, you know, I don't be working on the weekends, but I did.
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I was like, I have got to reply to this girl.
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And so there were some people that did give her like wise guidance.
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But on the flip side, so the positive for me was like other people who definitely struggle with this.
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You know, like there are so many more binge eaters in the world than will ever
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come forward and tell us that they're a binge eater.
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You know they got to read this and they
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got to like really see like okay I'm not alone you know hopefully they skimmed
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past the comments that kind of felt like you know but to take that step one
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and have that inner confidence in herself to put it out there and be like okay
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this is me right I need help I need help yeah no and I just felt like.
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So again, like I like am thankful, right, for social media because of that.
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Because before we before any before social media existed, ain't no celebrity
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getting out here writing an article about how she's a binge eater.
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You know what I mean? So like people who are don't have that kind of relatability.
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You know, they don't unless they're going to ask their best friend about it,
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which they're probably not, you know, because that is like the highest shame.
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For a lot of our, for a lot of ladies. You know, if you are a binge eater,
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it's like the biggest pinpoint for shame.
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Like for me, like one of my biggest shame, like pinpoints is anxiety.
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You know, like I hate that about myself. And so like the things that you hate
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about yourself, you're not just gonna be like, hey girl, you struggle with this
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too. You know what I mean?
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And so that is one beautiful thing about social media is to be able to see that
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like, oh gosh, there really are more people like me than I thought, you know?
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Yeah. That's where I think social media, it's kind of a love-hate relationship with it, right?
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There's a lot of chiefs out there in social media telling you,
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eat this, do this, work out this much, fast for 16 hours.
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Yeah. If I wanted to lose, this is my favorite one. If I wanted to lose 10 pounds
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by Christmas, this is what I would do every day. I'm like, okay.
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Okay. Cool, you know.
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So my, for those of y'all don't know, my youngest is about to be 17.
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It's a, it's a, she's a girl and she recently got off social media.
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Good. Which is huge. Now she does TikTok, but she got off of it because of the
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comparison that she was doing to herself.
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I mean, this was not preempted. She just deleted her Instagram account just on her own. Wow.
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Because she just didn't want to see the comparisons anymore. Wow. I was like.
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That is. It's. Yeah. That is awesome. I'm so proud of her for that. I am too. I'm too.
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So, you know, Carter, my oldest had a baseball coach in high school,
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and he was real hard on them.
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But there was a dad on the team that would always tell him to silence the noise.
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And so I tell a lot of our clients that you have to silence the noise because
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there's noise everywhere.
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The food noise, you know, where we work.
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About it is it's silencing all of the noise in your head because your mind is
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a dangerous place to be sometimes it is and i mean it's,
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I think what is so scary is that now, even if we're trying to silence the noise, you know what I mean?
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Like, even if we're, like, thinking about something and we're getting kind of
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worried about it or whatever, we're like, oh, let me distract myself.
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What do we distract ourselves with?
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Like, looking at other people's crap that makes us feel less than or not as
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pretty or not as rich or not as, you know, like, whatever. It's just like,
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when we're trying to silence the noise, it's not silence.
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It's distraction. It's more distraction.
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And so I think, I don't know, that's really often I worry.
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I pray so much about my girls when they become teenagers with that exact thing.
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Like once they have access to the world, Lord, please let them like understand
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how to how to be able to turn it off.
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Because Stacey, I don't know, like my little immature mind when I was Sarah
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Bray's age, I mean, like by her age, I did have a cell phone,
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but my God, I played snake on it and text my friends, you know, like that was it.
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You couldn't do much. Couldn't do much, you know. But I will say we had AOL
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and AIM back then, you know.
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And, girl, I would spend some time on that computer.
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Like, I was always on that computer, like, talking to people,
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whatever, you know. And so I don't know.
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I mean, I just know how obsessive I was with AIM and AOL back then.
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And I couldn't imagine if I had Instagram and Snapchat and TikTok and all Google
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at my fingertips at that age with that like brain capacity, you know.
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Google is just as bad as Instagram because, I mean, you can have a pain in your foot and Google it.
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And oh, my gosh, your toe's going to fall. It is. It is awful.
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And I mean, ChatGPT, it can be the same exact way. And somehow I feel like we
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have decided that ChatGPT...
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Is, like, the Bible. Like, because it accumulates information,
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like, because it can scan across the Internet, you know, then,
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like, whatever it spits out is the facts.
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And, like, I have seen some things specifically biblically that are incorrect,
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you know, that have come out of GPT.
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And so it's the same for everything, you know.
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We still can't consider it the final answer every time.
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Well, then, and AI also, because, I mean, you think of all these people that
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you see on social media and you like look at this woman and she's got this perfect body.
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It could be AI generated. Yes. This is totally off course, but my husband had
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to have an updated headshot for his job. Okay.
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He was like, I don't want to go all, you know, have some pictures taken.
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So he, there was a website and he had an AI headshot done.
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They like tell you to choose between like three or four outfits.
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Oh, they were so. good
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and so realistic but like it gave an example of putting it on a social media
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platform and what was for gender oh my god it is and it had him in this like
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silky satin shirt please and please send me that i've got to see ben i've got to see ben.
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Oh my god so hard but anyway
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that to say you don't know how
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these these people have altered their image to
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make them look like they're you know eating these 1800 calories a day and you
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know only working out three times a week and they have this rock hard body i
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mean we just do not know anymore and it's scary it is scary ai scares me to
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death it is scary my dad sent us a video yesterday of him.
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Somebody sent it to him because he shot on how to work AI, but somebody sent it to him.
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It was a video of him, and it was, I mean, it looked just like him,
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and a big buck deer was attacking him, like, in this video.
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Like, it was, I don't know, it was, it was crazy. Like, his facial expressions looked the same.
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Like, it was insane, and I saw this, so I saw this.
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It must have been an ad last week.
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And it was this girl. And the reason it sticks out to me is because I felt a
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type of way about myself after I watched it, which told me like,
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okay, you need to get off this platform right now.
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But she was like.
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Look at, I'm like literally, you know, I'm always thinking that people are out to like help, you know?
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So like anytime I watch, anytime I spend time watching a reel or an ad or whatever,
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I'm thinking, she about to help me out.
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She about to tell me how she cleans her house faster or, you know what I mean?
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Like that is my initial thought, which just shows you how freaking naive I am
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still. You know what I mean?
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So we all are, because they look to these people that they have all the I know.
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And so I'm watching this girl. And Stacey, when I tell you, she's like, what is it?
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Like, follow me a day after carpool drop off.
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Okay. First of all, I'm like, you look 23, but okay.
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So then she walks into this mansion of a home with like dark gray accents,
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like just really updated, beautiful home.
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Okay. there are legit massive mountains out her window.
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Like it looks like she is just living in a dream home.
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And truly, truly, I tell you, I watched it for about a minute before I swiped out of it.
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And all this girl did in this video was pull out some ingredients for breakfast.
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She didn't even tell us what she was having for breakfast.
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She sat down and folded laundry twice. It clipped to her folding laundry two
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different times in this video.
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Her taking laundry out, her getting dressed to go to the gym.
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Her after the gym, her at her sink doing skincare for the gym.
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And so what it did though, really, was it like, it scanned all over her house.
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So it was showing her in her daughter's bedroom, which was like more well-decorated than mine.
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It was showing her in her beautiful kitchen. It was showing her in her massive, like luxury bathroom.
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It was showing her with these windows, and I'm thinking,
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oh my God, you know, like that, is that her normal day to day?
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Like we just coming in, we making a smoothie, we working out,
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we doing laundry. Here's a day in my life, you know?
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And it just felt so, I immediately was like, well, I'd love that.
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Did she have like four kids? I don't know. I never saw her kids. I never saw her kids.
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Sounds like somebody else. I went down a rabbit hole watching.
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Does she live in a house with huge
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mountains? I mean, it looks like the mountains are outside her window.
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Yeah. But I just thought, oh, my God, what did I do wrong? Like,
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why didn't I get on this train?
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You know what I mean? But again, she offered no value.
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There was, unless I missed it at the end, there was no value to that other than look at me.
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Look at my house. Look at my huge refrigerator.
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Look at all my skincare products I can afford. Look at my daughter's clean and
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perfect room. I mean, it scanned a shot of her in like her closet was just kind
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of briefly in the background. Like I could just barely see it.
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All her shoes were so perfectly aligned in her closet. And I thought, oh my God.
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But so what that did for me as someone who is on social media,
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I'm like, damn, these people gonna see my, you know, my dirty clothes in the
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background when I'm showing them what set I've got on today.
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You know what I mean? Like, it makes you feel so, oh, I don't know.
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It makes us get in our head and we don't silence the noise and we sit there and we eat our pretzels.
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I actually have some pretzels in right here.
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Yes. You numb out. And just feel sorry for ourselves. When in reality...
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Is that really her house? Like,
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you have to think, is this really her house? Is this really her life?
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That's where I was going with that. Is I'm like, she could have photoshopped
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those mountains in that.
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And she could be sitting in a shack folding them clothes and dropped that background in there.
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You know what I mean? It's like my husband was photoshopped in this bar trying to get on Tinder.
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Which he really was if y'all missed the beginning of that part. Rewind it.
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I mean, but I don't know. I just, I don't know.
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That is, that is very, I know we've, we've really gotten off on a tangent here,
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but that is really one of the scarier parts about social media because,
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right, like they got us addicted to it years ago.
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Like we are already opening the app.
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There is no doubt about that. And so now it's like, we're consuming literally
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anything anybody shows us.
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And yeah, is it a big, beautiful home? Or is it, like you're saying,
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like a smaller waist and, you know,
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younger facial features or, you know, and it can just be, again,
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if we don't have that confidence in our own selves before we open that out,
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which a lot of us, again, are going to it for the distraction to disconnect
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from the things that are bothering us or the things that we should be getting done or whatever.
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It's like, what is this doing to us internally, you know, like for good, you know?
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Yeah, I mean, I really would love to see, but it's going to be like,
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I mean, I hope to still be around when your girls are teenagers and they get
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into the whole social media scene.
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But, you know, I will say some positives that I think come out of it is for women.
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I mean, all age ranges, honestly. So I go to the gym a couple times a week,
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and I see a lot more younger people there.
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I mean, like seniors in high school, college, early 30s working out.
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But I don't feel like they are pushing themselves like in these hardcore classes
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like, I mean, I did when I was in my 30s.
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Yeah. And that's where I think social media has helped in that aspect because
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it's teaching people how to love your body better with exercise and not just
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kill yourself and work out for three hours a day.
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And also with the whole
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perimenopause and menopause scene because all that has changed and they're seeing
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that hormones are good for women and there's more availability to look at what
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you need to do for yourself when you're in that phase of life of perimenopause
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or menopause and how you need to take care of your body.
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And, I mean, it can be confusing. You just have to know the right people to
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follow. Me, come join us.
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That's right. Email Stacey.
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No joint perfect fix i'm right there but i do think that that's put good,
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access at our fingertips too i think it's the same thing with menopause and
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i think this is not something that was really on my radar until you and i did
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that menopause podcast a couple years ago and just like kind of being with you
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as you were kind of walking through all that right and it's like.
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People are talking about it now. You know, whereas like even I feel like I'm
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sure your mom and I feel like my mom, like they just dealt with it in silence
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and they went to their doctor.
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They did what their doctor said, which we all know that sometimes our doctors
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don't have A, the time or B.
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The updated information to dive into it like you need for you to be living this
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out day in and day out and really trying to navigate.
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And so I think like that has been such a positive shift for women is to be able
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to have somewhere to go to say, OK, I'm not crazy because I'm having you all
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these different symptoms and side effects.
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And and then again, like having OK, it is it can be a lot of noise.
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It can be a lot of on that side of things, like with hormones.
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Sometimes I see people like it being overhyped, whereas like women my age,
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they're like tired and, you know, feel like they overeat and,
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you know, all this stuff.
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And they'll they'll kind of self-diagnose themselves with something based on
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what they see on social media when really they need to take a nap.
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You know, they need to stop eating junk in the drive through.
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Like there there are other things they need to do first before
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they say I need to get on all these supplements but at
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least there is the information out there for you to start kind of navigating
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if you are someone that has really been having the symptoms and has really been
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struggling like you know there's a place to start yeah well I mean it does it
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it's giving them the foundation to you like.
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Take better care of their health journey and to see, okay, what's really going on with me.
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But I will agree because people in your phase of life that are in the throes
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of being gone, we have so many clients that they have said three and four nights a week and, you know,
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their nights are longer, their dinners are quicker.
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They're tired because you're running the rat race and the majority of people
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are not eating enough and not fueling their body to To make themselves be able to keep going.
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Well, and they're not resting enough.
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They're not resting. They can't.
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But then when there is pockets of time to rest, like 10 o'clock at night or
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in the afternoon when you're scrolling your phone, like they aren't truly resting.
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You know, like so many of my PFM Plus ladies, like, you know,
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when we're talking about their lack of sleep, I'm like, okay.
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I'm going to need you to put your phone down when you get in the bed.
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Like, and then let's revisit this a week later, you know, because it's like
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when they find, which I get it, like we finally get to the end of the day and
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we're like, oh, now it's my time to unwind.
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Now I finally get to rest. So then you're like, what do you do? You open the app.
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And the next thing you know, we are scrolling and thinking about all the things
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we need, we want, we should have done, we should have bought,
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we should, you know, and then that's not rest.
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Our brain is still very, very much at work. and it's
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10 30 11 o'clock at night and our
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body is very much saying no we're supposed to be
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asleep you know it's a battle between the brain and the body
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and so and that circadian rhythm is so off
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which produces a crappy day the next day you know you're tired you're stressed
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you're hungry you know listen I wish that my 35 year old self would have known
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you because if y'all are not listening to her say these things and living it.
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You're missing out. You're doing yourself injustice because she's taught me
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to, you've taught me to rest. Like, literally.
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It's still really hard for me, I will say. I know. It's hard for us all because,
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you know, I think as moms, as women, you know, we want to do and want to take care of our people.
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But we got to take care of ourselves, too.
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But I think this focus for me, especially over the past year,
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has been like, I'm like, I'm constantly assessing how much of this unrest that I feel is physical.
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You know like they're running the roads like you're
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talking about you know and like there's something working like there are
26:40
some things we can't change right but how
26:43
much of it is mental like how much of it i i yes every thursday my children
26:50
go to dance every monday my children go to soccer every thursday after dance
26:56
we have a freaking soccer game every you know there there There are lots of,
27:00
every Tuesday up until just now, Sarah
27:02
Mason was cheering and we had cheer practice and like all this stuff.
27:06
So like those things, yes. And this is what I hear a lot, right?
27:09
From clients are like, oh, they'll give me their rundown of their whole week
27:12
and how the schedule lays out.
27:14
And like, you know, from three to four, I'm at ball practice and from five to
27:18
seven, we're at cheer, you know? And I'm like, okay, right?
27:22
Like I get that. And if that makes you feel like we are stressed,
27:28
then OK, like you are justified in that feeling, right? Like your calendar is packed.
27:32
You're working a full day and then you got all this crap with your kids.
27:36
But what are you doing between three and four?
27:40
Like for me, I can choose to either go up to the dance studio.
27:45
Let my kids out and sit there and scroll my phone, pick them up after.
27:52
You know, it feels like a blip because I've scrolled my phone and now my brain
27:56
is so full of crap and I'm in a worse mood and I'm tired and or I can go for a walk.
28:05
Or I can read a book. Or I can close my eyes and meditate right there in my car.
28:11
You know, so it's like, the goal is, is like not, you can't cut out all the practices.
28:16
But like, how can you end feeling the most refreshed that you can in that situation?
28:24
And I think that's where we're making the wrong decisions.
28:27
I think we're saying, this is my free time. This is my free time.
28:30
I don't have my kids because they're at practice, whatever. And we're picking
28:33
up our phone and wasting it. It's a waste. It's an absolute freaking waste.
28:37
And I used to do this last year before, you know, I had all the health stuff around this time.
28:43
Well, I was really sick all year 2024, but I really decided to make that change
28:48
for a lot of things towards this time last year.
28:51
But I would, you know, because Jess would be out of town a lot during the week.
28:55
And the girls had dance multiple nights a week last year.
28:59
And I would go up to that dance studio at 5 30 or whatever after working the whole day,
29:07
and I would sit in the parking lot and open my laptop and say like okay I'm
29:12
just going to get some things done knowing good and well like my brain wasn't
29:16
functioning that late and also knowing good and well those things did not 99
29:21
of the time those things did not have to be done at 5 30 that night,
29:26
they could have been done at 8 a.m. the next morning, you know?
29:30
So it's about, like, you have to have that control of saying, you know.
29:35
What am I going to choose to not partake in?
29:39
You know, again, it doesn't change the fact that everybody needs to be fed,
29:44
that everybody got to get where they got to go.
29:46
Like all this stuff, like it doesn't change that. But how we show up in those pockets of time,
29:53
or to me, I personally think what has been so life-changing for me over the
29:58
past year, the fact that when my butt hits the bed, my phone no longer comes with me.
30:05
You know, like when I put myself in that bed, my phone has already gone on the charger.
30:10
You know, and when I wake up in the morning, I do check my phone because I'll
30:14
be thinking, if somebody died, I got to know at 6 a.m. You know, like I check it.
30:18
I go check it and make sure I don't have 59 missed calls and, you know, whatever.
30:24
But after that, my phone stays where it's at.
30:28
Like it doesn't have to come with me, you know, and let me get distracted by
30:33
it. And that in itself has allowed me to feel like I'm taking control of the time that I do have.
30:42
To truly rest, you know? I haven't gotten to that point about not taking my phone with me.
30:47
I do not look at it when I get in bed, but I still use this alone.
30:52
Well, and you have, you're like my neighbor.
30:54
Like y'all have babies that aren't here. Y'all have babies that are in another town.
30:59
And when Jess is out of town or when Sarah Mason spends the night away,
31:05
I have my phone by my nightstand, you know?
31:08
And I hope that one day, right now, because that is so like,
31:11
that's not just super often.
31:13
It's like, it's just there, you know what I mean?
31:16
And so I know when Sarah Mason starts driving and all that, like I know my phone
31:21
will be right back by my bed. You know, I know that as a mama.
31:25
But for me, it's about, by God, I hope by then it's released,
31:30
I've released the control it has over me, you know, to want to open it up and
31:34
look and see what everybody doing at 10 o'clock at night. You know what I mean?
31:38
You know, you just hit on something because my mom, she starts driving.
31:42
You have like 360 right now. Oh, for sure. My whole family.
31:46
I'm on it. Listen, my whole, my side of the family, my mom, my dad,
31:51
my sisters, and I'm on it with Jess's whole side of the family.
31:55
But y'all, I mean, like we talk about, you know, we refer to some parenting
32:00
styles as helicopter parenting.
32:03
But when you look at all of these things that we do with having like 360 and X, Y, and Z,
32:09
we're helicoptering ourselves through what we look at, what we choose to do
32:16
our free time with, what we choose to put in our mouth,
32:18
what we choose to do for exercise, because...
32:23
We're still trying to conform to the way we think the world should have us or see us.
32:30
We want to follow the rules. There's so many rules, and we have to follow them all, Stacey. You know?
32:36
Why? We don't. I know. I mean, y'all are going to listen to us and think that
32:41
Constance and I have this all figured out.
32:43
And, you know, we don't have any of these issues, but we don't.
32:47
I mean, like, I look at myself in the mirror sometimes, and I'm like,
32:50
where did that rule come from? But you know what?
32:54
I've chosen to accept it as hard as it can be sometimes.
32:57
You know, you just, we are all human. It doesn't matter if we have an RD behind our name. Right.
33:04
You know, I've talked about my mentor on here a few times, and I feel like he,
33:08
that has been the biggest challenge he has had me face is like.
33:14
Why do you constantly feel like you have to control the things?
33:21
Like any of it, all of it, right? Because like truly, like as a believer,
33:25
like we know who's in control.
33:28
And so there are so many things that like, honestly, whether we have Life360
33:33
or not, the things are going to happen.
33:37
You know what I mean? whether we you
33:40
know put you know certain restrictions
33:44
in place for our children or our
33:47
spouse or whatever it may be like they still
33:49
have free will like there's just there's so many things that we are
33:52
obsessing over and we are trying to like you
33:56
said helicopter you know like whether you
33:59
eat lettuce every single day from now until
34:02
you're 85 stacy you could still get
34:05
heart disease like you could still get diabetes like
34:08
you know like we like sure we are trying to be responsible and and biblically
34:12
it says that right to like make responsible decisions and like you know don't
34:17
go against what you know is wrong and that kind of thing but at the same time
34:22
like there are so many people out there with unexplained unexplained results you know,
34:28
I mean listen it was this time last year I think I was texting you but I was
34:32
like oh my gosh i'm gonna die like my glucose was high my cholesterol was higher.
34:40
Yeah i mean i'm a dietitian i was like well might as well just i have a pfm
34:45
plus client right now who's in she has lost she lost a good bit of weight before
34:50
she became a pfm plus client and she had her last 10 pounds to lose,
34:55
And she's in a very healthy range. Like her last 10 pounds is like,
34:58
she'd just be trying to reach a goal. You know what I mean?
35:02
And she is so close to that weight, to that goal weight, like three or four pounds weight.
35:06
She had a doctor's appointment last week and her cholesterol is high.
35:10
And she is like, how in the H-E double hockey sticks?
35:14
Like cholesterol has never been high before, you know?
35:17
And I'm like, you know, like, and she sends me her tracking every day.
35:21
So I know what she's eating. You know, I can't be like, it's all about bacon
35:24
because it ain't. She eats so well.
35:27
And so I'm like, this is just one of those things where it's,
35:32
I mean, she has family history of it, you know?
35:34
And so it's just like, I know this sucks so bad, like, because she worked so
35:39
hard to like get back healthy and, you know, stay healthy.
35:44
And now this, you know, but it just goes to show that like, we have got to be
35:50
comfortable with that unknown.
35:52
You know, we've got to learn to like be okay with.
35:56
I'm going to do these things because I know they're good for me.
35:58
And I know, you know, they'll make me feel good.
36:00
You know, right? Like, we know eating salads every day will make us feel way
36:04
better than eating pizza every day. Like, we know that.
36:07
But at the end of the day, like, that outcome, we can't guarantee it.
36:11
Nothing is guaranteed no matter how much we helicopter ourselves to death, you know?
36:16
Absolutely. It's crazy. You know, it really is just sitting here looking at
36:19
you and listening to you.
36:21
Like, it's so beautiful to see how you have changed. Like, from when I first
36:25
came on board, but, like, even to this time last year, like,
36:29
having all this figured out, what are you, 37? 38. 38.
36:35
That's a beautiful thing, my friend. I don't, I don't say I have it all figured
36:39
out. I didn't say you had it all figured out.
36:41
But, like, to get to this comfortable spot of calm inside yourself or working on calming yourself is.
36:51
It's been, it's been a wild ride. It is something that I'm just so thankful
36:56
that I got my eyes open to.
36:59
Yeah. And then I'm like, I'm looking back and I'm like, you know,
37:03
I had strep how many times in 2024?
37:06
I had all these signs and symptoms of autoimmune.
37:09
Like I had all this stuff going on and now I'm like...
37:13
Looking back and just even thinking about how, like, it's not big stuff, Stacey.
37:17
It's not like I was like, you know, running around like a crazy mess all the
37:22
time, or I had like these huge stressors going on in my life.
37:26
Like, you know, like there was nothing, like there was nothing that was just
37:30
like this dramatic shift from
37:33
last year to this year, other than the tiny bubbles in my life every day.
37:39
You know, the way I would wake up and immediately like look at my phone and stay there.
37:46
The way I would prioritize work, like I would check emails, I would check our
37:51
social media before I would open my Bible.
37:54
You know, I would allow myself to work out only if I didn't feel like I needed
38:00
to get up to my computer right now.
38:02
I would double check you on everything. I mean, honestly, if we're,
38:07
she's laughing, but she knows it.
38:09
Like, I mean, y'all, I hired Stacey years ago.
38:12
Stacey has proven nothing but loyalty and, like, kick and tail. You know what I mean?
38:20
And, like, our ladies love her so much. And, like, but even still,
38:25
like, the control freak in me was like, let me make sure. Let me,
38:29
you know, let me double check.
38:31
Like, well, now she knows that my technology skills are still not up to me.
38:36
I mean, we both are in that boat. But I'm just saying, like,
38:39
there were things, right, and I do, right, there are some things that we do
38:42
need to follow up on, right?
38:44
But, like, there are a lot of things that we don't need to follow up on that
38:48
I was following up on that I was just, like, couldn't take my hands off of it.
38:53
You know, just some stress. What was your business? I would,
38:56
I mean, I would not have expected less. I mean, this is what you were building.
39:01
But it goes back to exactly what I just said, right?
39:05
Like you can eat salad every day instead of pizza, but you still can't guarantee
39:09
that you don't get heart disease.
39:11
I can lay my hands on everything all day, every day and stress myself out about
39:16
it and never shut it off and always have, you know, availability.
39:20
My business could still fail you know
39:23
what I mean like it doesn't like and so I that's one thing
39:26
I think is just like the trust of knowing like God got me here and he's gonna
39:31
take me wherever I need to go you know and that's something yeah I have to remind
39:35
myself sometimes you know like but I think that's really what like is the foundation
39:42
of the change is just being able to say like no I truly trust,
39:46
like we all be out here saying as Christians, right?
39:48
Like, we're all like, oh yeah, Lord, I trust you.
39:51
You know what I mean? But like, do you, when you're in your control freakness
39:56
or do you, when something is showing you that it may go wrong,
40:01
you know, or like, do you, you know, or are your actions saying something different?
40:06
And so for me, I think that along with just putting some true like boundaries in place of...
40:14
No, I'm not going to write you back because you text me at 730 at night about
40:18
something that is, number one, weight loss related. And I just don't ever think
40:23
that that's life or death emergency.
40:25
And two, you use my cell phone number and I don't think that is appropriate. You know what I mean?
40:29
Like, no, I don't have to reply to, you know, like putting those kind of boundaries
40:32
in place has has really been been that plus like meditation,
40:38
prayer, therapy, those.
40:43
Learning learning why i am the way i am and
40:46
trying to you know figure out the trinity for yourself
40:49
right right so but i don't think it's
40:52
you know i i look forward to next year learning
40:55
more you know changing more so anyway y'all
40:58
we were so off topic in this this is definitely a
41:01
two-part episode upon her okay so let's
41:04
say let's make sure we covered all of our notes though on social media so
41:07
we talked about that first one okay this is what I did just want to talk about
41:11
okay what another social media issue that I have and this is a negative okay
41:16
I do feel like TikTok and Instagram we will see so many like trends in the kitchen
41:24
like trends at the gym like,
41:26
there's just so people are just out there trying to be seen and heard y'all and like,
41:31
Newsflash, in the marketing world, they are advising people to use disruptive statements.
41:37
I mean, this is like they know, we all know as people that are trying to market
41:41
that like it's saturated out there.
41:44
So you got to stand out. And so how are you going to stand out with disruptive statements?
41:48
And so we'll see like this crazy stuff on social media.
41:54
And like, obviously, it sucks us in. And then what do we do? We want to try it.
41:59
Okay. And so that's like a lot of these people, you know, cottage cheese was
42:03
on such an uptick because people were, you know, look at you,
42:06
Stacey Dunn, she's getting up, leaving the screen, y'all. She hates cottage cheese so bad.
42:10
But it was on a... It's still having this moment. It is, okay.
42:15
But like at first people were using it correctly.
42:17
They're like, you know, like put some cottage cheese in this casserole or put,
42:21
but now they're, everybody, that's been used up.
42:24
So people are trying to eat like say it people are like i tried
42:27
cottage cheese ice cream and i'm like did you really think
42:30
that was gonna be good like did we really think did
42:34
we really think a salty cheese as ice cream was gonna
42:36
be good oh and now it's like a a blizzard you seen that is that what you're
42:42
talking no a blizzard you need to talk i love it yes you do i love even my therapist
42:51
says that like any social media, like TikTok is okay, because like,
42:55
I mean, I get lost shopping in TikTok,
42:57
but it's funny. It makes you laugh.
43:01
This girl made a blizzard using cottage cheese. You gonna try it?
43:08
No, I'm going to go get a blizzard. Right. What did she put in there to make
43:12
it good? Like, what did she put in there?
43:14
She put a little bit of nonfat yogurt, some whipped cottage cheese.
43:21
I mean, I stayed there for a hot second because when she put the cottage cheese in there, I was gone.
43:26
That is... Like, some no added sugar or sugar-free chocolate syrup.
43:32
My God. Do we really think that tastes like a blizzard? No.
43:36
No. No. Like a blizzard tastes like a blizzard because it's made of like a ton
43:41
of sugar and like heavy whipping cream.
43:44
And I mean, in reality, how many times do you really go get a blizzard?
43:48
Not that many. Not that many. And again, and if you're one who gets it a lot,
43:53
if you're one who gets a blizzard, if you're one who gets a blizzard a lot,
43:56
ain't no way this cottage cheese TikTok blizzard is going to taste good to you. Right.
44:02
But then on the flip side, if you're one that don't get a blizzard a lot,
44:05
why would you waste your time?
44:08
Why don't you just go get the blizzard, you know?
44:11
I'm going to have to look it up and see. Okay. I'm sure there's a client of
44:15
ours that might have seen it.
44:20
I'll keep talking while you're looking it up. But like, so with that being said,
44:23
though, like people are, y'all have to just keep in mind that people are out
44:27
there trying to come up with disruptive things to put in front of your face
44:33
to hold the views, right?
44:34
For the, you know, their money, right? Because they're making money off of y'all's views.
44:39
You know what I mean? And so this, I just, I hate it because like,
44:43
again, they're convincing.
44:44
They are salespeople. And so, like, I hate it because, you know,
44:47
somebody will watch, and I'm sure thousands, billions, millions,
44:51
I don't know, have watched this cottage cheese blizzard and thought,
44:54
oh, she says it's so good. She says it tastes like the real thing.
44:57
So then they go out and they try it. And what? It's real nasty.
45:00
And so that sends this signal to our brains that says healthy food is gross,
45:06
you know, or weight loss efforts is going to be nasty.
45:10
When in reality, again, like Stacey said, let's just eat some decent,
45:14
like, normal food today and then go have you a mini blizzard tonight and be
45:19
fine, you know, with your weight loss.
45:21
I can't find it. You can't find it? Yeah.
45:24
It's about balance. Yes. People are scared to balance.
45:32
I feel like another struggle with social media is that people are,
45:37
which I think, again, like they're showing their progress and they're showing
45:40
how far they've come. And this is such a great thing.
45:44
But two, if you're just starting out or you're not very comfortable in your
45:48
weight loss journey yet, you can feel like you're behind.
45:52
Like it can make you feel a sense of urgency. I know that's the case for me in business.
45:56
Like if I watch somebody that's like I'm 30
46:00
and I started my business at 25 and now I'm a multi-millionaire I'm like well
46:04
golly I'm so behind you know what I mean like so it can be really again like
46:09
affect that affect your your confidence in your approach to whatever it is you're
46:14
trying to approach when you are consuming a lot of content related to the thing that you are.
46:20
Striving well I mean we we have to walk some of
46:23
our ladies through that too because like they'll start and feel
46:26
like they'll say I feel like I'm behind what are
46:28
you behind from right nothing right well even
46:31
in our own community right like we
46:34
have on our Friday weigh-in report we're like hey you know we ask everybody
46:39
to tell us you know how much are you down because I do I think it creates like
46:43
excitement and motivation but what people don't understand is like somebody
46:49
may have commented, I'm down five pounds this week.
46:52
But like she may have had, she may have a hundred and some odd pounds to lose.
46:56
Whereas like if you only have 25 pounds to lose, baby, you ain't gonna lose
47:00
five pounds this week. Like it just doesn't work that way, you know?
47:04
But I think that if we could take the accountability inside of our group and
47:10
the women supporting other women and place it outside of this group the world
47:16
would be a great place you're right because y'all i mean it's just.
47:21
It's the accountability and the support that we all need through anything in life.
47:28
Whether you're making a cottage cheese blizzard or going through the drive-thru and getting a real one.
47:35
Right. I don't know. I think it's just like the space that we've created is
47:41
like very like, we good. We good with whatever.
47:44
You know, as long as you are aware of your choices.
47:48
You know what I mean? like have the
47:51
blizzard today even if you are over your calories already
47:54
but just be aware of your choice but also if you
47:58
worked your meal today or your meals today
48:01
around fitting in that blizzard baby we are so proud of you you know absolutely
48:06
like i'm so proud of you you go girl okay we started this podcast y'all at like
48:14
right before lunch did you eat lunch before we got on here I had a snack.
48:19
Oh, yeah, you got them pretzels. Ah, I'm thankful. I got a parfait.
48:22
I made a little parfait right before we came up here. But now I'm ready for
48:25
lunch again. This is a lot.
48:26
I have gotten, this is why I asked if your lettuce was ready.
48:32
Because I've just gotten to where I love a big salad for lunch.
48:37
Just keeps me full. I mean, I put all kinds of stuff in there.
48:40
And I'm like, I'm out of lettuce.
48:43
Well, I will let you know when mine comes in. But I planted late.
48:46
I'm very nervous about it, like producing well. We'll see.
48:50
But you go have your big salad. I have been craving Subway of all things. Isn't that weird?
48:59
So I bought deli meat and I'm gonna like make kind of like a wrap.
49:06
Like I'm gonna heat it up with some cheese and like a bunch of veggies inside.
49:09
So that's what I'm gonna have for lunch.
49:11
I had that for breakfast. I had like a,
49:15
southwestern like scramble thing and i put it in a
49:18
wrap yeah it's good i'm so
49:22
jealous of people that live in texas that can go to heb because of
49:25
those butter tortillas they got do you know have you do you see my stories back
49:28
when we went a couple months ago they the tortillas they have a tortilla that
49:32
heb makes that like tastes like butter like i mean i don't know i don't know
49:37
what they put in it but it's so good that that sounds like it'll be good in
49:41
your wrap yeah all right Well,
49:45
y'all, thank y'all so much for joining us.
49:47
And this is definitely your listening to the second episode of this podcast.
49:54
But as always, y'all remember to say grace.
49:59
Thank you for listening to today's episode of Say Grace Podcast.
50:04
If you enjoyed it, it would mean the world to me if you left me a five-star
50:08
review. Also, make sure to follow me.