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Royals Who Died on the Toilet: Our Classiest Episode Yet · Ridiculous History

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Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of iHeartRadio. Welcome back to
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Speaker 1: the show Ridiculous Historians. Thank you, as always so much
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Speaker 1: for tuning in, and shout out to our resident super
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Speaker 1: producer and regicide expert, the research associate for this episode,
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Speaker 1: mister Max Williams.
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Speaker 2: Indeed, regicide, I love that word. Do you remember the
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Speaker 2: death metal band named di A Side?
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Speaker 1: Yes, to kill a God, to kill a God, all
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Speaker 1: these asides, there's side.
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Speaker 2: And we'll have many as sides of our own in
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Speaker 2: this episode, most likely in terms of tangent.
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Speaker 3: A lot of poop jokes. By the way, I'm Ben
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Speaker 3: or Nol because we.
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Speaker 1: Are a no pun left behind kind of crew, and
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Speaker 1: we want to start, of course, with the requisite disclaimer
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Speaker 1: every single death is a tragedy. However, as time passes
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Speaker 1: on and you get a little distance, you can see
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Speaker 1: the gallows or in this case, the poop humor in
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Speaker 1: some of these unfortunate things, especially when we're talking about
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Speaker 1: medieval era royalty who had a tendency to be corrupted
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Speaker 1: by the power that they wielded.
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Speaker 2: You know, we talk about the Song of Ice and
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Speaker 2: fire books a lot when we do these accounts of royals,
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Speaker 2: and some of their bad behaviors. You may recall spoiler alert,
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Speaker 2: I guess for the series a major character that gets
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Speaker 2: killed by a crossbow while sitting on privy.
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Speaker 3: Yes it is uh.
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Speaker 1: This is a continuation of our ongoing Royal Death series.
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Speaker 1: Checkout parts one and two in your podcast feed of choice.
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Speaker 1: This one, Like you said, Noel, this one has a
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Speaker 1: little bit of a little a little bit more of
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Speaker 1: a focus as well. In this episode, we're exploring the
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Speaker 1: stories of British monarchs and a German born Russian empress
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Speaker 1: who all died in weirdly similar ways depending upon which
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Speaker 1: historical sources you trust, So shout out to shout out
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Speaker 1: to some of our sources. Khalad el Hassan for History Collection,
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Speaker 1: Yoda Suzuki MD, and Abe DeAndre Junior MD for National
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Speaker 1: Library of Medicine, of course, Britannica dot com, more and more.
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Speaker 1: I'm persuaded that they're they're just solid with a lot
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Speaker 1: of their research and spoiler Elizabethmaxim Grunge dot com. Great
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Speaker 1: people of history who died on the toilet.
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Speaker 2: One hundred percent? So why don't we get to it?
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Speaker 2: Or should I say pooet? I shouldn't, but I did
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Speaker 2: takes these bacsies on ridiculous history. George the Second sixteen
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Speaker 2: eighty three born, passed away seventeen sixty. He was the
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Speaker 2: King of Great Britain, the Elector of Hanover, and a
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Speaker 2: Prince elector of the Holy Roman Empire. Of course, until
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Speaker 2: he passed away, he was a constitutional monarch. So this
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Speaker 2: was a little bit different than the like, you know,
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Speaker 2: power bestowed by God, right.
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Speaker 3: Like absolute monarch.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, So there were some other people in the
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Speaker 1: room who could say, I don't know, man, I love
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Speaker 1: to yes, had you because you're the king and you
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Speaker 1: could kill me.
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Speaker 2: But so talk era where Parliament is really starting to
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Speaker 2: kind of take the reins, right.
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Speaker 1: We're yet, we're in an era wherein people are still
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Speaker 1: accepting the notion that royalty and monarchy are divinely inspired
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Speaker 1: and decreed. But the role of some demographic of the
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Speaker 1: people is increasingly prominent. Right, So, the as a constitutional monarch,
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Speaker 1: our buddy, George the Second, to your point, he doesn't
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Speaker 1: have a ton of control over concrete British policy. However,
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Speaker 1: people I don't want to say mascot, but kind of mascot.
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Speaker 1: The people love this feeling of continuation, right of legacy
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Speaker 1: of stability and the British Empire also prospers during George's
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Speaker 1: time as king. He is the last British monarch born
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Speaker 1: outside of Great Britain. He is also the last British
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Speaker 1: monarch to personally lead an army into battle. Queen Elizabeth
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Speaker 1: just never quite got there. That battle took place in
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Speaker 1: seventeen forty three the War of Austrian Secession. George commanded
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Speaker 1: troops in what is known as the Battle of Dettingen
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Speaker 1: against a French army.
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Speaker 3: That's right.
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Speaker 2: And then in seventeen forty five there was a bit
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Speaker 2: of a political scare when an uprising was staged by
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Speaker 2: the Jacobins in order to restore the Stewart dynasty to
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Speaker 2: the throne. But this was an abject failure. So more
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Speaker 2: or less, during George's tenure, things were pretty you know,
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Speaker 2: pretty easy going as far as political regimes go.
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Speaker 1: I mean, especially in comparison to some other to some
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Speaker 1: other historical reigns.
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Speaker 3: Think about George was he wasn't.
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Speaker 1: Everybody's favorite guy because he did not seem to be
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Speaker 1: a man of the people to the public. He had
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Speaker 1: a thick German accent. He was he was not himself
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Speaker 1: a yes ander, he was a no better he was.
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Speaker 1: He was nagging people constantly. He was really he really
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Speaker 1: had a short temper. And he was called boorish often,
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Speaker 1: and borish does not mean boring, no, it means a
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Speaker 1: slovenly kind of lay about, I guess, or just someone
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Speaker 1: that lacks decorum, someone that.
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Speaker 2: Doesn't know how to read the room. And he was
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Speaker 2: not very well liked. You mentioned his accent. He was,
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Speaker 2: in fact ones a small, young gentleman boy, and that's
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Speaker 2: carried along with him throughout his reign, and that accent
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Speaker 2: alone was sort of like a bit of.
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Speaker 3: A red flag to the proper Brits of the day.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, and still one of the main drivers for what
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Speaker 1: is considered a successful leadership position is how your country
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Speaker 1: is doing while you're in charge. There was a lot
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Speaker 1: of growth in prosperity for Britain. There was a lot
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Speaker 1: of growth and prestige. The British Empire during this time
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Speaker 1: was continuing its expansion to become the empire where the
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Speaker 1: sun never set, with possessions around the globe.
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Speaker 4: And just to throw this note in here, this is
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Speaker 4: the guy that our state of Georgia is named after.
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Speaker 5: It's this King Georgia, I want it. There's three in
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Speaker 5: a row. It's one right here.
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Speaker 2: Okay. Good to know that our state, our fair state,
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Speaker 2: was named after a man who suffered about as undignified
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Speaker 2: a death as one could, much similar to the King
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Speaker 2: of rock and roll, mister Elvis Presley. It's October twenty fifth,
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Speaker 2: seventeen sixty, a morning like any other. As Tom Petty said,
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Speaker 2: it's good to be king. And so our boy George
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Speaker 2: wakes up six am sharp. Good on you for not
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Speaker 2: sleeping in George, and he has a cup.
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Speaker 3: Of hot yummy, my hot coco.
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Speaker 1: He was probably mad about it, knowing George, and uh.
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Speaker 1: And then he went to the royal toilet and he
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Speaker 1: had a difficult conversation with his facilities.
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Speaker 3: He U.
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Speaker 1: The polite way to say it is he overstrained himself
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Speaker 1: and he had an aortic aneurysm. And this happens to
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Speaker 1: people more often than any of us would like to imagine.
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Speaker 2: If anything, I would hope that the legacy of King
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Speaker 2: George the Second. Besides, you know, the fair State of
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Speaker 2: Georgia is a lesson to the people to eat lots
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Speaker 2: of fiber and don't strain the toilet is not a
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Speaker 2: place to read the paper, do your business and then
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Speaker 2: and then go elsewhere. Don't just sit there pushing It's bad.
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Speaker 2: It's bad for the bot. Let it happened to you.
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Speaker 1: And also, uh, just be the be the wave in
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Speaker 1: the ocean. Also shout out to squatty potties, which are
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Speaker 1: apparently way more healthy for you. Anyway, we do know,
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Speaker 1: if you'll recall ridiculous historians in our previous episodes on
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Speaker 1: royal deaths, there are a lot of historical questions, right.
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Speaker 1: There's a lot of vagary in these sources, just because
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Speaker 1: of the amount of time that passed and because honestly,
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Speaker 1: of the importance of the people. So we have to
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Speaker 1: remember that history is kind of history is always written
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Speaker 1: with a slant, so it's it's difficult sometimes to get
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Speaker 1: the truth about embarrassing deaths of powerful people. In this case, though,
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Speaker 1: we do have some solid sources, more so than others,
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Speaker 1: because we do know, because do do we. Because mister
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Speaker 1: Andrews the house surgeon, closest thing they have to a
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Speaker 1: you know, doctor McCoy. He is immediately brought in after
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Speaker 1: George's valet. Here's a crash in the bathroom he sees
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Speaker 1: that the king has fallen from in mac. Really, he
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Speaker 1: has fallen from his throat.
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Speaker 5: I'm quoting the source. I'm quoting the source.
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Speaker 1: Ah, yes, that's that's our that's our buddy, Khalid Elissad.
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Speaker 1: And so the false throwers come out and this surgeon,
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Speaker 1: mister Andrews is brought in and says, I can't revive
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Speaker 1: the king.
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Speaker 3: I better keep taking his blood away.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, because that was always going to work, That's definitely.
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Speaker 2: It was certainly the science of the times. But after
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Speaker 2: multiple attempts at blood letting, Uh, it was pretty clear
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Speaker 2: that the king had had passed from this mortal coil.
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Speaker 2: I don't know did did did he ever get the
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Speaker 2: Did the strain result in anything? I don't think he
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Speaker 2: When you die, you kind of you poop yourself. One
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Speaker 2: one would hope that at the very least he you know,
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Speaker 2: he got it out.
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Speaker 3: That's the very end.
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Speaker 1: But there are the modern doctors who have looked back
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Speaker 1: at this case and specific there are primary sources. We
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Speaker 1: know a doctor Nichols performed an autopsy on the King's
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Speaker 1: cadaver and embalmed him as well, meaning we have an
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Speaker 1: autopsy report, and this means that in the modern day
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Speaker 1: medical professionals have been able to examine the case, and
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Speaker 1: they have some differing opinions. You know, with the benefit
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Speaker 1: of modern technology and modern learning, you can poke holes
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Speaker 1: in some of the autopsy.
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Speaker 3: It's right.
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Speaker 2: We have a perspective from some modern physicians. Yoda Suzuki,
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Speaker 2: MD and ab DeAnda Junior, MD wrote in a paper
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Speaker 2: revisiting the death and autopsy of King George the Second
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Speaker 2: for the National Library of Medicine, and they had this
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Speaker 2: to say. First, as noted in the description of the autopsy,
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Speaker 2: the aorda did not rupture the right ventricle ruptured Surgeons
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Speaker 2: have long observed bleeding from the epicardial surface of either
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Speaker 2: ventricle associated with an acute a or to dissection, typically
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Speaker 2: originating from tracking of subadventiteal blood from the aorda onto
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Speaker 2: the surface of the harp, not as the result of
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Speaker 2: a hole in the ventricle. Okay, totally get that. Secondly,
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Speaker 2: going against doctor Nichols hypothesis, going back to quoting the piece,
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Speaker 2: with modern experience with pulmonary hypertension and with real time
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Speaker 2: monitoring with either right heart catheterization or continuous monitoring with
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Speaker 2: a pulmonary artery catheter. We know that systemic pulmonary artery
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Speaker 2: pressure or a pressure surge in the artery will not
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Speaker 2: result in.
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Speaker 3: Rupture or perforation of the right ventricle.
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Speaker 2: Instead, such high pulmonary artery pressures result in acute failure
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Speaker 2: of the ventricle. For example, the pathophysiology scene with a
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Speaker 2: large pulmonary embolism. Third, King George the Second had been
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Speaker 2: having cardiac symptoms for some time.
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Speaker 3: I think that's the important takeaway here.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, because he had even even back then, they knew
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Speaker 1: enough about the circulatory system to know that the king
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Speaker 1: had a bum ticker, because he had complained about what
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Speaker 1: would be called distresses and sinkings about the region of
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Speaker 1: the heart if we if we unpack this, because of
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Speaker 1: course there's a little bit of high level medical terminology there.
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Speaker 1: Everybody is saying that his heart gave out. They're just
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Speaker 1: talking about how it gave out and where right, how
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Speaker 1: the how the system broke down with arteries, ventricles, et cetera.
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Speaker 1: We don't know for certain then the absolute specifics of
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Speaker 1: how King George the Second did pass away, but we
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Speaker 1: do know where he died on the toilet.
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Speaker 3: He did he did.
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Speaker 2: Let's move on to another royal who I believe was
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Speaker 2: named Edmund ironside Edmund the Second Edmund, which is a
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Speaker 2: fun spelling of Edmund born circa nine to ninety three
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Speaker 2: died November thirtieth of ten sixteen. He was the King
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Speaker 2: of England from April twenty third to November thirtieth, ten sixteen,
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Speaker 2: and the son of King Ethelred ethel Red the Second
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Speaker 2: the unready.
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Speaker 5: Best king name of all time, and he pops up
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Speaker 5: so often't.
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Speaker 3: He just wasn't ready. He was caught unawares every time.
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Speaker 4: Because this series, I've been learning a lot more about
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Speaker 4: this time in history, which I really didn't know anything about.
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Speaker 4: This guy just is always like omni president. He did
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Speaker 4: nothing as king. He wasn't ready, he was always there.
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Speaker 4: He's always twice.
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Speaker 1: I picture him in like a sitcom where they introduce
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Speaker 1: people by their names. I want him to show up
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Speaker 1: in the sitcom intro mont you know, where the people
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Speaker 1: look towards the camera and do a little bit, and
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Speaker 1: I want him to not have been ready for his
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Speaker 1: shot and his guest slot in the camera, you know.
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Speaker 3: I want him to be on his phone or something.
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Speaker 1: And like Edmund or ooh, making a milkshake anyway, Edmund
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Speaker 1: here street named Edmund Ironside. He possibly died in a
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Speaker 1: similar restroom or water closet location. He went against his
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Speaker 1: dad in the name of romance.
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Speaker 3: His oh you love to see that?
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Speaker 1: Yeah, Ethel read the second said I'm not ready classic
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Speaker 1: Ethel red for you to marry the widow of this
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Speaker 1: Danish lord that's occupying English territory. I think you're doing
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Speaker 1: it to up your chances at gaining the throne. And
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Speaker 1: Edmund was like, you're not the boss of me, even
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Speaker 1: though you're thinking so, and you don't understand me.
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Speaker 3: Dad, leave me alone.
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Speaker 1: And nevertheless, when England was invaded later in ten fifteen,
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Speaker 1: Edmund did raise an army in northern England and he
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Speaker 1: ravaged areas of the world that wouldn't back him up.
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Speaker 1: That's how he got the street name Ironside because of
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Speaker 1: his quote staunch resistance to that massive invasion, which was
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Speaker 1: led by a Danish king named Canute.
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Speaker 3: I want to say.
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Speaker 4: Fun note either his son or grandson became king. Also,
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Speaker 4: his name was Hardy Canute. It's probably not how it
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Speaker 4: was pronounced, but it's how it's spelt. Hardy Canute.
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Speaker 2: I love a good hearty Canue. I just let out
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Speaker 2: a hardy Canute.
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Speaker 3: I blame that Chile was.
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Speaker 4: Just be careful, we don't want to have you. On
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Speaker 4: the next part of this series, Ben.
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Speaker 3: Expiring on the commode, no way to go.
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Speaker 2: So when his father ethel Read passed away in April
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Speaker 2: of ten sixteen, there were some you know, counselors and
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Speaker 2: a citizen group of London town that's declared that Edmund
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Speaker 2: was their ruler. But there was also, of course, there's
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Speaker 2: all these disputes when there's a monarch who passes away.
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Speaker 2: There was a larger body of more moneyed gentry, perhaps in.
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Speaker 3: Southampton they declared for Canute.
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Speaker 1: They were like, we liked the Danish guy better, and
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Speaker 1: your dad was just really never ready for anything.
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Speaker 3: He's never on time. They were in cahoots swith Canute.
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Speaker 4: And if I'm remembering correct, I could look this up
17:31
Speaker 4: really quickly, but I'm not going to Knute's dad had
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Speaker 4: been king of England at one point, because there was
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Speaker 4: like I believe that's correct, ethel Red was king, then
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Speaker 4: Knut's dad was king, and Dan ethel Wright was king again,
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Speaker 4: and then now it is Connute versus Edmund, who's ethel
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Speaker 4: Wright's son.
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Speaker 5: Going real game of thrones right here, That's really what's
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Speaker 5: going on.
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Speaker 1: And so Edmund decides to go proactive with it. He says,
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Speaker 1: I'm going to be more than ready, and he he
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Speaker 1: launches a series of attacks against his rival Canute. And
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Speaker 1: if Edmund is doing pretty well, he regains control of Wessex,
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Speaker 1: he saves London from a siege. He eventually is defeated
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Speaker 1: by Canute at Ashington in Essex on October eighteenth, and
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Speaker 1: they have a peace settlement. And in this peace settlement,
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Speaker 1: you know, they talk Turkey, they jibber jabber, and Edmund
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Speaker 1: gets to keep possession of Wessex, and Canute gets all
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Speaker 1: the land north of the Thames, the River Thames. And
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Speaker 1: then after Edmund dies, probably of natural causes, we're about
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Speaker 1: to get into it, Canute becomes the sole ruler of England.
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Speaker 1: People are wondering is it? Is it a natural cause?
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Speaker 1: An accident of fate? The dark lottery of unfortunate events
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Speaker 1: Over at grune dot com. Elizabeth Baxmu mentioned earlier, says
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Speaker 1: that Edmund died suddenly on November thirty, ten, sixteen. He
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Speaker 1: was a very young dude. By the way, he was
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Speaker 1: in his twenties and his cause of death was originally
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Speaker 1: listed as having occasion to retire to the house for
19:14
Speaker 1: relieving the call of nature. His brother in law hid
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Speaker 1: in the pit in the outhouse pit and stabbed the
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Speaker 1: king twice what from beneath with the dagger, left the
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Speaker 1: weapon fixed in his butt, and then escaped the bathroom.
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Speaker 3: So death by butt stabbing.
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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, so can we just really quickly paint the picture.
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Speaker 2: These would have been sort of a more brick and
19:42
Speaker 2: mortar version of like a porta potty, right, so there's
19:46
Speaker 2: like an area underneath where the stuff goes. This guy
19:50
Speaker 2: would have been up to his ankles and human waist.
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Speaker 3: Ankles is very optimistic. He would have been in there.
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Speaker 4: He would have remember remember the soap episode. This is
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Speaker 4: one time period where they didn't use soap Paul.
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Speaker 2: Right, right, and so this and what does that matter
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Speaker 2: when he's in human Well, it's because.
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Speaker 4: The humank on to our afterwards he's brought him back
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Speaker 4: and he's like, oh, the king is dead, and is
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Speaker 4: like his.
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Speaker 5: Like pants are just covered in fecal matter. It's like
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Speaker 5: he died on the throat.
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Speaker 2: Everything was fine, I wasn't there exactly. We got to
20:21
Speaker 2: find out who did this. It's like the hot dog sketch,
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Speaker 2: and I think you should leave.
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Speaker 1: And this comes from this description comes from Historia Anglorum,
20:29
Speaker 1: which is a history of England written by Henry of Huntington,
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Speaker 1: first published in eleven twenty nine. Anyway, the other theories
20:38
Speaker 1: say that maybe someone was hiding down there and shot
20:41
Speaker 1: him with an arrow, or maybe somebody was hiding down
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Speaker 1: there and got him in the booty with an iron hook.
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Speaker 3: I bet George R.
20:51
Speaker 2: Martin took some inspiration from a lot of these for
20:54
Speaker 2: what I described earlier.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred percent. Song of Ice and Fire is
20:58
Speaker 1: very loosely inspired by the War of the Roses as well.
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Speaker 1: So this account is heavily disputed. You'll hear a lot
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Speaker 1: of historians, the majority, in fact, I would say today,
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Speaker 1: arguing that Edmund did die from natural causes. But if
21:14
Speaker 1: it's natural causes versus the repugnant story of someone hiding
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Speaker 1: in a little pond of poop to kill you through
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Speaker 1: the butt, then you're gonna go with that story.
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Speaker 3: He left it in there insults to injury.
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Speaker 1: Well, he can't think about it from his perspective. You
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Speaker 1: can't be running around with it. You're already covered in poop,
21:38
Speaker 1: you look suspicious.
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Speaker 2: It would have been so much easier to just like
21:41
Speaker 2: murder people secretly. There were no fingerprints, no DNA, nothing,
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Speaker 2: and you know, it was just about like hearsay. If
21:47
Speaker 2: he didn't have an eyewitness, was there wouldn't have been
21:49
Speaker 2: what's more private than literally the privy and he's no
21:52
Speaker 2: one's gonna be no one else is going to be
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Speaker 2: down there. Yeah, this would have been connected to a sewage,
21:57
Speaker 2: something like a cistern. Perhaps maybe he could have even
22:01
Speaker 2: crept in there from some other introm outside.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm also thinking, you know, the murder weapon would
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Speaker 1: have been the key indicator of regicide because to your point, Max,
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Speaker 1: it probably was way more common for people to run
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Speaker 1: around covered in poop.
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Speaker 3: He was not the only guy who had poop on him.
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Speaker 2: And also, if you're stabbing someone from underneath in the
22:26
Speaker 2: all over you so this guy's covered in poop and
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Speaker 2: blood and potentially guts, because that's where that's what would
22:32
Speaker 2: come out. If you stab someone in the butt hole there,
22:35
Speaker 2: they would get gutted, probably.
22:37
Speaker 5: Especially if you're pushing your strength.
22:40
Speaker 1: And then you're pulling if because to stab twice you
22:43
Speaker 1: would have to.
22:47
Speaker 3: Because was also potentially in play.
22:50
Speaker 1: Yeah, where we might tag this one is explicit because
22:54
Speaker 1: we're talking about prolapsing and disabaliant.
22:57
Speaker 2: This is some goatsy stuff right here. Man, don't look
23:00
Speaker 2: that up. Don't look that up.
23:01
Speaker 1: Well, let's we're since we're up, Since we're already here,
23:05
Speaker 1: let's go to one of the biggest myths.
23:08
Speaker 3: That I'm leaving to be busted.
23:11
Speaker 1: Catherine the Great, which is a way cooler nickname than
23:14
Speaker 1: the Unready. For many years, you may have heard this
23:17
Speaker 1: too growing up, if you were a history buff. For
23:20
Speaker 1: many years, one of the dirty legends about Catherine the
23:23
Speaker 1: Great was that she died having sexual congress with an animal,
23:27
Speaker 1: specifically a horse, that she was a zoophile. That's not true.
23:39
Speaker 3: None of it.
23:40
Speaker 2: That the death I get, But was she I mean,
23:43
Speaker 2: I know she was into some kinky stuff. Have you
23:46
Speaker 2: seen that show The Great on I think it's on Hulu.
23:50
Speaker 2: It's definitely definitely intrigue, Yeah, for sure.
23:54
Speaker 4: I Mean it's just like it's hard to tell what
23:57
Speaker 4: all's real and what's all fake because everyone's slandering everyone.
24:00
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying not.
24:02
Speaker 2: And I think because she was a strong woman who
24:04
Speaker 2: owned her sexuality, men didn't like that. And I'm sure
24:08
Speaker 2: rumor mongering was just running wild. And what how better
24:12
Speaker 2: to slander someone for their sexuality than to say something
24:15
Speaker 2: vile as vile as this, you know.
24:17
Speaker 5: And you say it after they die, right.
24:19
Speaker 1: And she was also she was also not native to Russia.
24:23
Speaker 1: She was a princess born in Germany who became the
24:27
Speaker 1: Impress of Russia from seventeen sixty two until she passed
24:31
Speaker 1: away in seventeen ninety six.
24:33
Speaker 2: And she got the czarina, a term I was not
24:36
Speaker 2: aware of. I guah, yeah, but that's it's sort of
24:39
Speaker 2: like a queen versus king. I guess I've never heard
24:41
Speaker 2: that term before.
24:42
Speaker 1: Yeah, so she only becomes the queen because or the
24:47
Speaker 1: impress is the term they would use. Because her husband
24:51
Speaker 1: saw Peter the third was assassinated. You know, you got
24:55
Speaker 1: to wonder about the state of their marriage was very
24:58
Speaker 1: much a political thing, not a romance thing. People at
25:01
Speaker 1: the upper echelons of society at this time didn't often
25:04
Speaker 1: marry for love. She was married off at age fourteen,
25:10
Speaker 1: and yeah, and the marriage was disastrous because Peter was
25:17
Speaker 1: mentally unstable, extremely neurotic, and max to your point about
25:21
Speaker 1: how history is written. There were a lot of historians
25:25
Speaker 1: posthumously saying that he was impotent. So eighteen years of
25:30
Speaker 1: just an absolute horrible relationship.
25:33
Speaker 2: I think a lot of that is dramatized in The Great.
25:37
Speaker 2: It's been a minute since I've seen it and I
25:38
Speaker 2: haven't finished it, but it's very good and it's very funny. Actually,
25:42
Speaker 2: I believe your ghost Lanthemos has something to do with it.
25:44
Speaker 2: The guy who did The Favorite, and he's got a
25:48
Speaker 2: new movie coming out. It's called Poor Things. It's sort
25:51
Speaker 2: of like a Frankenstein kind of story, with Willem Dafoe
25:55
Speaker 2: as like a Victor Frankenstein tepe figure.
25:57
Speaker 3: It's supposed to be great. I'm a big fan of
25:59
Speaker 3: his work.
26:00
Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely could understand why she would work her way
26:07
Speaker 2: to not taking any crap from anybody after being treated
26:10
Speaker 2: so horribly for so long.
26:12
Speaker 1: Yeah, and she did have children or issue as they
26:16
Speaker 1: would be called in royal parlance.
26:18
Speaker 2: I know's yeah, me too, learned so much today, guys.
26:22
Speaker 1: She had a series of lovers, and she herself strongly
26:27
Speaker 1: hinted that none of the kids she had were actually
26:31
Speaker 1: her husband's and when her husband he is Peter was
26:35
Speaker 1: a grand duke when he married this fourteen year old
26:39
Speaker 1: and eventually he becomes the Czar of Russia in seventeen
26:42
Speaker 1: sixty one, and he is terrible at this. All he
26:48
Speaker 1: does is talk trash about Russia and talked about how
26:51
Speaker 1: Germany is so much better. Imagine if Steve Jobs went
26:55
Speaker 1: up on those Apple you know ted talk things and
26:58
Speaker 1: just talked about how great micro softwise and said the
27:02
Speaker 1: iPhone stink.
27:03
Speaker 3: So that was bizar. He was not good for morale.
27:06
Speaker 1: He tried to get rid of his wife several times,
27:10
Speaker 1: like as in, kill her, not divorce her. But she
27:13
Speaker 1: also hated him, and so she joined a conspiracy to
27:18
Speaker 1: stage a coup. In seventeen sixty two, Peter is arrested,
27:23
Speaker 1: he is forced to abdicate the throne, and just like
27:28
Speaker 1: in a week or eight days, he is murdered. Catherine
27:32
Speaker 1: gains the throne and the crown. She is the Impress
27:35
Speaker 1: for thirty four years. She will rule Russia. You can
27:39
Speaker 1: imagine this was controversial.
27:41
Speaker 2: Indeed, and she ruled I believe quite successfully, right, I mean, yeah,
27:47
Speaker 2: she did a good job. So when she passed away, Unfortunately,
27:54
Speaker 2: these rumors started to circulate that, because of her insatiable
27:59
Speaker 2: sex drive again quotation fingers here, that she died from
28:04
Speaker 2: sustaining injuries resulting from, as you mentioned, ben intercourse with
28:09
Speaker 2: a horse. The truth, however, while embarrassing, was not nearly
28:15
Speaker 2: as inflammatory. The truth in fact, was that she had
28:20
Speaker 2: been suffering from bouts of constipation and much like our
28:27
Speaker 2: first entry in today's episode, perhaps may have pushed a
28:31
Speaker 2: little too hard seeking relief while on the.
28:35
Speaker 3: Privy and suffered a stroke.
28:38
Speaker 1: She would have been of more advanced years here as well. Right, Yeah,
28:44
Speaker 1: she was sixty seven. And the thing people don't tell
28:48
Speaker 1: you about being the Emperor, the Empress, the king, the queen,
28:53
Speaker 1: really any high level royalty, is that you don't often
28:57
Speaker 1: get to poop alone. You have valets, maids who are
29:01
Speaker 1: following around. They're waiting outside the door maybe, and that's
29:04
Speaker 1: what happens to Catherine. These folks are her maids. Her
29:08
Speaker 1: retinue is waiting outside the door for her to finish
29:13
Speaker 1: her deposit, and she is grunting, she's groaning, she's you know,
29:18
Speaker 1: she's making all the noises you've heard at airport restrooms.
29:22
Speaker 1: And then when she stops grunting. Her maids look at
29:26
Speaker 1: each other and they say, okay, wow, that was a
29:28
Speaker 1: weird one. Thank god, you know, the the Empress has
29:31
Speaker 1: got it out. And they wait and then they keep waiting,
29:35
Speaker 1: and they wait longer and longer the minutes drag on.
29:38
Speaker 1: Eventually one of them decides to risk their career and
29:42
Speaker 1: say something like, your majesty all is well.
29:46
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a fine line.
29:48
Speaker 2: Right when you're attending to somebody and you have to
29:50
Speaker 2: literally wait outside for them to do their business.
29:53
Speaker 3: At what point do you come and knocking, you know,
29:56
Speaker 3: and at out to the death of Stalin.
29:58
Speaker 4: And like the way like we've we've talked about like
30:03
Speaker 4: the czars and the empresses, Like remember we had that
30:05
Speaker 4: episode the two part about the Empress that everyone like
30:08
Speaker 4: hated or whatever was evil, Like if you interrupted, these
30:12
Speaker 4: people are just wrong.
30:13
Speaker 5: You're dead.
30:13
Speaker 4: You're gonna kill you, they'll execute you, or they'll make
30:16
Speaker 4: you be a jester or something.
30:18
Speaker 1: Right, right, and Jester the role of the Gester itself
30:22
Speaker 1: is an episode when I'm right in the future, because
30:25
Speaker 1: that's that's way different than it's portrayed and dressed in
30:29
Speaker 1: motley and sometimes yeah, oh it gets we might have
30:33
Speaker 1: to tag that when explicit too, so they don't hear
30:36
Speaker 1: an answer when when they inquire about the empress, and
30:40
Speaker 1: so eventually they take a peek into the water closet
30:45
Speaker 1: and they find her dead on the commode. According to
30:49
Speaker 1: again our pals of Britannica, this is not a one
30:53
Speaker 1: hundred percent proven story. In fact, they think it is
30:57
Speaker 1: woefully inaccurate.
30:58
Speaker 2: I mean, you're gonna print the most interesting version of
31:02
Speaker 2: the story, I guess, or at least that's the one
31:03
Speaker 2: that people are gonna remember. She suffered the event that
31:07
Speaker 2: led to her death while on the toilet, so for
31:10
Speaker 2: all intents and purposes, she died on the toilet. However,
31:13
Speaker 2: the truth is more likely that she actually passed the
31:16
Speaker 2: next day as a result of the stroke. She had
31:18
Speaker 2: the stroke in the bathroom, and then the next day
31:21
Speaker 2: she did pass away on November seventeenth of seventeen ninety six.
31:27
Speaker 3: No horse involved whatsoever.
31:29
Speaker 1: No horse involved as far as we know, and probably
31:34
Speaker 1: not a horse involved in the death of Ironsides, just
31:36
Speaker 1: because it'd be tough for it to get into the
31:38
Speaker 1: lavatory pit. And then, you know, you don't have to
31:42
Speaker 1: love horses. But let's face it, they haven't stabbed anyone, and.
31:45
Speaker 2: They gotta say I've been I went to I've been
31:48
Speaker 2: taking a lot of tours lately, and I went to
31:50
Speaker 2: the Detroit Institute of Art, and I was reminded how
31:54
Speaker 2: in a lot of like Renaissance paintings there are horses
31:58
Speaker 2: in the most intense torsions with the really aggressive like
32:02
Speaker 2: you know, flared nostrils and they're all reared back and stuff.
32:05
Speaker 2: I'm a big fan of the depiction of war horses
32:08
Speaker 2: in art.
32:09
Speaker 1: There's a great exhibit samurai exhibit here at the High
32:13
Speaker 1: Museum where you can see real life samurai horse armor.
32:18
Speaker 3: It is so cool.
32:19
Speaker 1: Look up a picture if you get a chance, visit
32:21
Speaker 1: if you happen to be in town. And then also
32:24
Speaker 1: I was at the Prado recently in Madrid, and they
32:28
Speaker 1: are all about some of those paintings.
32:30
Speaker 3: Man.
32:30
Speaker 1: I I also like the I also like the weird
32:34
Speaker 1: symbolism where all of a sudden in a medieval painting,
32:38
Speaker 1: there's some guy with a snail, or there's yeah, or
32:43
Speaker 1: there's some guy with.
32:43
Speaker 3: A well look what kind of hygienk Simon.
32:47
Speaker 1: Expression while they're being u while they're being ripped apart. Anyhow, yes,
32:52
Speaker 1: these stories are important, and they tell the way they
32:56
Speaker 1: are told tells us about the society in which they
32:59
Speaker 1: were created. And so it's a struggle. History is an
33:03
Speaker 1: active thing. It is a struggle to determine the truth.
33:06
Speaker 1: But we're very happy today to end our episode by
33:12
Speaker 1: conclusively telling you it's got the Ridiculous History stamp of approval.
33:17
Speaker 1: Catherine the Great did not die in some sort of
33:20
Speaker 1: TMZ situation with a horse, so put some respect on her.
33:24
Speaker 2: Name indeed, But yeah, I think that gets us through
33:28
Speaker 2: this installment of royal deaths. That, as Max pointed out
33:32
Speaker 2: in our conversations off Mike, these are some of the
33:35
Speaker 2: most popular episodes we do. So we're just giving the
33:38
Speaker 2: people what they want. Y'all are messed up, not Max,
33:40
Speaker 2: March is not us.
33:42
Speaker 3: But we're good boys and girls.
33:44
Speaker 4: It is condiments a UFO episode, and this they are.
33:48
Speaker 5: They are above everyone.
33:50
Speaker 3: Else I've got.
33:51
Speaker 1: I've got more condoment episodes too.
33:53
Speaker 3: I always excited. Okay, oh kind of, It's just so great.
33:56
Speaker 1: And yes, as Noel said, thank you, as always this
34:00
Speaker 1: ridiculous historians, thank you for tuning in. Thanks our research
34:03
Speaker 1: associate and super producer, mister Max Williams, and let's all
34:08
Speaker 1: remember the main takeaway, whether you feel you are a prince,
34:12
Speaker 1: a princess, or a pauper or a peasant, don't push
34:17
Speaker 1: yourself literally, don't push yourself on the toilet.
34:20
Speaker 2: Or if you're John Popper from Blues Traveler who lost
34:23
Speaker 2: a lot of weight and still blows those harmonicas with
34:25
Speaker 2: a plumb.
34:26
Speaker 1: And thanks also to christ Vrasiotis, thanks to Eves Jeffco,
34:29
Speaker 1: thanks to Alex Williams who composed this.
34:32
Speaker 3: Slap and bop. Shout out to our pal Gabe luz Yer.
34:36
Speaker 1: And oh we also had a Quist run in in.
34:40
Speaker 3: Vegas, a run in but not an appearance.
34:43
Speaker 1: No, his rider is crazy as he becomes increasingly villainous.
34:48
Speaker 3: We'll see you next time, folks.
34:57
Speaker 2: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio Apple Podcasts
35:01
Speaker 2: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows,