Latest / Admonition Podcast / What Do I Do When I Hurt - Jacob Kennedy - Feb. 08, 2026

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What Do I Do When I Hurt - Jacob Kennedy - Feb. 08, 2026 · Admonition Podcast

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  appreciate Aaron leading that song.
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  It gives us a great reminder.
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  We all suffer.
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  We all face hardships and difficulties in our lives.
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  We all encounter loss and pain.
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  And it is a comfort to us to know that God didn't leave us without an understanding.
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  He didn't leave us without a plan to deal with grief, to deal with loss.
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  And so today we want to ask the question, what do I do when I hurt?
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  How do I respond?
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  How do I go on with my life when I have lost someone so dear?
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  From Genesis three and on, mankind faces suffering, faces pain.
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  This world is no longer a world where there is no suffering.
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  As a result of man's sin in the garden, we face loss, we face hardship.
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  And until the time that the Lord returns, we will face such difficulties.
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  And so what do we do?
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  Very, rather, we want to consider three points on this line of thought.
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  Three ways in which we can deal with hurt, we can deal with pain.
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  Number one, mourn.
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  Take the time to mourn.
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  We must feel this pain.
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  There are times when we wish to just go on and not feel.
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  the emotions not feel what we are dealing with.
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  but we need time to process.
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  Ecclesiastes 3 and verse 4 we are told there is a time to mourn.
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  There is a time that needs to be set aside to mourn.
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  There's a time to weep, a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to celebrate, if you will.
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  In life we face these different times but we need to not shortchange ourselves from taking the time to
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  grieve, to feel those emotions, to process what's just happened.
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  When we look at 2 Samuel chapter 12, we see David doing just that.
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  In 2 Samuel 12, starting in verse 15 and going down to verse 23, we have the results of David and Bathsheba's sin.
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  The immediate result is we have Nathan the prophet coming to David and he tells him, you've sinned.
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  He tells him you've done wrong.
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  And David repents of his sin, of his wrongdoing, but the consequence remains the same.
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  The consequence of his sin is that his son dies.
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  And as his son is sick, as his son is dying, David is fasting and praying.
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  He is grieving and hurting.
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  He took the time to mourn.
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  Brethren, we need to understand that mourning looks different for everyone.
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  Not everyone deals with grief in the same way.
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  Not everyone faces loss in the same way with David after having his son just died.
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  After mourning and praying to God and fasting and hurting so deeply, when his son finally passes away, David gets up.
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  He rises, he washes himself, he cleans himself up.
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  He gets presentable as we might say.
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  And don't forget the fact that he worships God.
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  the God who he had as the world would see it every right to blame for his son's death.
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  But David understood that the consequence of his sin was that death.
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  It wasn't God's fault.
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  and David worships the Lord.
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  He chooses to worship the Lord and to eat.
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  Keep in mind, as we said, he's even starving himself.
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  He's been fasting and praying, but he takes the time to eat.
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  But David's not the only example of mourning we have in the Bible.
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  In Genesis 37, we find the account of Jacob as he mourns the supposed death of his son, Joseph.
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  Look with me there in Genesis 37.
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  Genesis 37, starting in verse 31.
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  His sons come to him with uh the tattered remains of Joseph's coat of many colors.
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  And they took Joseph's coat and they killed a kid of the goats and dipped the coat in the blood.
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  And they sent the coat of many colors and they brought it to their father and said, this we have found.
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  Know now whether it be thy son's coat or no.
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  And he knew it and said, It is my son's coat.
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  An evil beast must have devoured him.
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  Joseph is without doubt rent in pieces.
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  Notice how Jacob mourns here.
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  And Jacob went rent his clothes and put on sackcloth upon his loins and mourned for his son many days.
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  And all his sons and all his daughters rose to comfort him.
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  But he refused to be comforted.
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  And he said, For I will go down into the grave unto my son, mourning.
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  Thus his father wept.
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  The example that Jacob sets forth is one of assuming.
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  He assumed his son was dead.
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  while his sons are to blame for misleading their father, Jacob shouldn't have assumed.
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  And that assumption brought upon him this immense grief, this immense hurt, this immense pain, and he expresses it by tearing his clothes.
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  He expresses it by wailing and weeping.
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  Notice also that it's prolonged.
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  That it's not for an hour, it's not for a day, no, but it's for many days.
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  In fact, Jacob even says, I will go to my grave mourning the loss of my son Joseph.
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  and he refuses to be comforted.
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  Jacob shows us an example of one who grieves without hope.
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  One who is hopeless in his mourning, in his pain.
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  And then there's Joe.
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  If anyone that says that they lived the most difficult life that could ever be lived has suffered the most pain that could ever be suffered, I would challenge them to put up
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  against Job.
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  Job suffered immensely.
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  And Job, one, alone, he loses his wealth, he loses his family.
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  Job, two, he would also lose his health.
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  But at the end of Job one, notice what is written.
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  Job one.
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  starting in verse 20.
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  Then Job arose and rent his mantle and shaved his head and fell down upon the ground and worshiped and said, Naked came oh I out of my mother's womb and naked shall I return
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  thither.
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  The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away.
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  Blessed be the name of the Lord.
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  In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly.
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  Now we understand as we read Job chapter 1 that Satan is the one loving these persecutions, loving this pain against Job, but Job doesn't know that at this time.
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  He thinks that God's taking this away.
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  But when faced with this realization or assumption really, Job still worships God.
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  Yes, he expresses his grief.
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  He rinses his clothes.
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  A common Old Testament expression of grief, of mourning.
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  But he doesn't stop there.
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  He worships God.
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  How many of us in our times of pain and our times of suffering would think about worship as the last thing on our minds?
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  Think about God as some far-off thought of, I'll get around oh to reaching out to God.
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  I'll get around to praying.
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  I'll get around to worship.
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  But Joe worships God immediately.
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  We need to take the time to mourn, yes.
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  But in so doing, we do need to neglect the God who is the God of all comfort.
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  We do not need to neglect the worship of our Lord.
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  When I hurt, I need to take the time to mourn.
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  But number two this morning, when I hurt, I need to take the time to pray.
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  Prayer is an essential to life of a Christian.
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  It is essential to our lives as how else are we going to communicate with God?
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  Prayer is an open door to the Creator of this world, to the one who has all power, who has all authority, to the one who is all knowledgeable, to the one who loves every one of us.
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  Prayer is an open door.
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  And in James chapter five and verse 13, James says, any among you afflicted?
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  Let him pray.
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  Is any merry?
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  Let him sing, Psalms.
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  When we are afflicted as Christians, when we face persecution, when we face pain, when we face suffering, when we face grief, our first response should be to pray to God.
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  To reach out to the one who can do something about it.
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  To reach out to the one who wants to comfort us.
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  The greatest example that we have of prayer in response to grief is that of Christ.
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  In Matthew 26, verses 36 through 44, we have recorded for us the scene of the Garden of Gethsemane.
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  In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus is preparing to die.
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  He knows that the end has come for Him.
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  that the time has come for him to be put on the cross, to suffer that brutal and agonizing death.
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  And as Jesus is preparing himself, he prays to God.
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  He begs him, please, if there be any other way, let this cup pass from me.
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  Some three times he prays this prayer and yet when he concludes it, he says, nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt.
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  Part of praying in response to grief and response to pain is saying to God, I understand that your will might be for me to remain here a little longer.
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  As Christians, we need to be okay with God's will.
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  We need to be okay with not understanding God's will at times.
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  But we need to pray.
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  when looking at this idea of prayer.
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  Prayer takes different forms.
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  There are different prayers recorded in scripture, one of which is a prayer of thanksgiving.
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  In Philippians 4 and verses 4 through 6, we are told to rejoice in the Lord always.
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  And again, I say rejoice.
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  Let your moderation be known unto all men, the Lord is at hand.
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  Who wrote this?
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  Paul did.
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  The Apostle Paul, the one who was, as we'll note later, suffered great affliction.
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  The one who was persecuted time and again.
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  The one who at this time was in prison for preaching the gospel.
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  He says, rejoice in the Lord always.
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  in Ephesians 5 20 he speaks to the fact that we are to be people of joy that we are to be always giving thanks
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  being thankful to God.
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  Suffering is not fun.
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  Pain and grief are not fun.
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  but often they are great instructors.
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  Often they are helpful to us.
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  If nothing else, to simply learn that this world's not our home and that life is short.
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  But how will we respond?
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  Recently, as many of you know,
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  friend of mine, Matt Paschal, passed away.
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  He was 30 years old.
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  And if I've heard it once, I've heard it a thousand times.
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  A prayer of thanks that we had the time we did with Matt.
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  when we face loss and grief.
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  We need to be thankful to God for the time that we did have.
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  for those moments of joy we did have.
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  We need to be thankful to God for the good times and thankful to Him for the instruction we learn in the bad times.
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  We need to be thankful in our prayers.
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  But sometimes we pray prayers of confusion.
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  As we've already noted, we don't always know what God's exact will in a situation is.
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  We don't have a direct message from God saying, you should take...
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  uh you should turn left instead of turn right out of a parking lot today.
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  We don't get that direct message like that today.
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  And so there are times we are confused, in our confusion, we should trust God.
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  Look with me at Psalm chapter 13.
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  Psalm 13, the Psalmist writes, How long will thou forget me, O Lord, forever?
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  How long will thou hide thy face from me?
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  How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily?
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  How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?
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  Consider and hear, O Lord, my God, lighten mine eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest mine enemies say,
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  I have prevailed against him and those that trouble me rejoice when I am moved.
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  Notice verses five and six.
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  But I have trusted in thy mercy.
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  My heart shall rejoice in thy salvation.
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  I will sing unto the Lord because he hath dealt bountifully with me.
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  David writes in this moment of sorrow.
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  in this moment when his enemies are around him and he's confused as to why God's not answering him, he's not delivering him from this situation, David says, nevertheless,
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  despite the fact that I don't know why I'm still here, despite the fact that I'm questioning whether or not you're even listening to me, God, I'm still going to trust in
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  you.
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  I'm still going to trust in your mercies and rejoice in your salvation.
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  rather than that's faith.
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  That is the faith that we as Christians should emulate.
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  in the book of Habakkuk.
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  Habakkuk is a prophet who questions God.
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  In chapter one we see this very plainly that he spends the majority of the chapter being confused, questioning God, why are the Babylonians the one, the ones that you're choosing
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  to use against Israel?
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  Yes, I understand Judah is wicked and sinful, but the Babylonians?
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  God, don't you know how wicked they are?
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  God, don't you know that they're idolatrous?
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  And God answers him in chapter two.
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  And chapter three, we have a realization from a back end.
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  A realization that relies on trust.
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  Look with me in a back at 3.
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  Habakkuk 3.
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  starting in chapter, in verse 18.
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  Habakkuk says, Yet I will rejoice in the Lord.
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  I will join the God of my salvation.
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  The Lord God is my strength and He will make my feet like hind's feet.
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  And He will walk and He will make me to walk upon mine high places.
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  at the end of his conversation with God.
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  At the end of the prophecy that he is given by God, Habakkuk says, I'm going to rejoice.
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  There are times when we will be confused.
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  There are times when we will look at God and we'll say, what's your plan here?
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  Why am I suffering?
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  There are times when we see a faithful brother, one who is on his way to being a preacher, on his way to doing great things for the Lord and is currently doing great things for the
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  Lord.
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  We're tempted to ask the question, God, why him?
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  Why not those who are wicked, those who are living the base life?
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  Why not those who are not following you?
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  But even in our times of question, even in our times of confusion, we need to trust in God.
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  We need to pray to God.
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  and rejoice in His salvation.
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  When I hurt, I need to take the time to pray.
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  And finally today.
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  We need to serve.
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  We must take the time to serve.
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  Romans 15 one.
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  We that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the week.
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  Now in context, Paul has just been talking about differences of opinions about how there are those who view something this way and view it as a matter of conscience and some and
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  other Christians view it this way.
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  But neither one of them are right or wrong.
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  And he begins for chapter 15 by saying bear the infirmities of the week.
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  Bear with one another.
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  As Christians, we need to have a heart of service.
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  A heart that says, I care about you.
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  A heart.
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  that follows what James 1.27 says.
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  Pure religion.
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  And undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and the widows and their affliction and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.
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  Even in our times of grief, even in our times of mourning and sorrow, we need to take the time to serve.
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  Look at me at 2 Corinthians, Chapter one.
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  2 Corinthians 1, verses 3 and 4.
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  As Paul opens his second letter that is recorded for us to the Corinthians, he says, bless be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of
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  all comfort, Who, notice this, comforteth us in our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in trouble.
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  By the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.
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  Brethren, we are not comforted out of some selfish desire.
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  We are comforted so that we can serve.
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  God sees us through trials so that we can serve others who are going through the same trials.
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  God aids us so that we can aid others.
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  The focus of a Christian is never on himself.
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  The focus of a Christian is always to be on God first and others second.
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  We are to be people of service.
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  People who look out for each other.
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  And the fact is, when we're busy helping others, when we're busy serving others, it's hard to let grief overcome us.
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  It's hard to, as we will sometimes say, shut down due to grief because where our focus is not on ourselves and on what we've lost, our focus is on how can I help others who are
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  experiencing loss?
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  How can I help others who are hurting just as I am hurting?
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  In Mark 10 and 45, we are told that Jesus did not come to be served, but to serve.
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  Brethren, if our Lord and Savior, deity in the flesh, came not to serve Himself, not to be served of men, but to serve others, where do we get the idea that we are to be served?
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  Where do we get the idea that it's all about us?
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  We are to be people who will emulate the example of Christ, even in doing something so menial as washing feet.
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  In John 13 we see that example of Christ that he does the task that was reserved for the lowest of the low of servants in the house.
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  He does something that you would never see a king do.
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  because he was a servant.
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  Because he wanted to show his disciples that we are to be servants.
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  We are to care for one another.
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  And part of service is empathy and sympathy.
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  In Romans 12, 15, we are told to rejoice with those that do rejoice and to weep with those that weep.
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  When someone is in the middle of mourning, when someone is in the middle of facing a terrible sorrow, a terrible
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  pain in their life, not the time to say, hey, by the way, I just got a new car.
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  It's the time to mourn and to weep with that brother or sister.
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  It's the time to mourn and to weep with that person who just lost someone.
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  Galatians 6 and verse 2, we are told to bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ.
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  As Christians, our focus is always to be on others around us and not on ourselves.
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  Our focus is service.
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  And when I hurt, I need to take the time to serve.
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  One final passage before we close.
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  Look with me at 1 Thessalonians.
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  First Thessalonians 4.
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  versus 13 through 18.
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  But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope.
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  For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.
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  For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep, for the Lord himself shall
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  descend from heaven.
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  with a shout and with the voice of the archangel and with the trump of God and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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  Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and so shall we ever be with the Lord." Notice verse 18.
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  Wherefore?
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  Because of all these things that we have just said, because of the fact that we have hope, because of the fact that we are not going to be left alone.
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  because of the fact that we will be reunited with the faithful, because of the fact that we will be with God for all of eternity, Paul writes, comfort one another with these
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  words.
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  Brethren, we face pain, we face sorrow, we face grief, but we don't face it as those who have no hope.
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  We face it as those who understand what God has done for us.
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  We face it, yes, taking the time to mourn, taking the time to grieve.
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  but then praying to God.
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  reaching out to the Father, asking comfort of the one who is the God of all.
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  and then we serve.
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  That's what we do as Christians.
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  when we sang the song, Tempted and Tried.
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  We won't understand everything that ever happened.
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  God won't give us an accounting of saying, on this day, at such and such time, this happened for this particular reason.
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  God's not going to do that.
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  But the point of the song and the point that we as Christians need to learn and appreciate is that when we get to heaven, we won't care.
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  When we get to heaven, we won't care what happened on this earth.
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  We won't care about the suffering that we face because it all be worth it.
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  But if you're here today and you find yourself not a Christian, You find yourself outside of the body of Christ, you find yourself without hope.
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  But praise be to God that He didn't leave you without a plan.
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  He gave us a way to be saved.
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  And the more important question than what do I do when I hurt is what do I do to be saved?
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  What must I do to be saved?
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  God's plan is simple.
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  You see it behind me.
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  There is no reason for anyone in this world to not be saved.
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  God has given us the message.
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  He's given us the plan.
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  And as Christians, our job is to share it.
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  And if you find yourself here today as a Christian, but realizing that there is sin in your life.
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  Realizing that you have not been who you should be.
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  Don't wait.
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  We don't know the day of our death.
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  We don't know when our time will come.
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  And so we must always be ready.
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  If we can help you today, be ready to meet the Lord.
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  Do not hesitate.
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  Come now as we stand and