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15 - Do Not Make a Business of What is No Business - The Art of Worldly Wisdom - Baltasar Gracian · The Philosophy Insights Collection

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  Do not make a business of what is no business. As some make gossip
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  out of everything, so others business. They always talk big, take everything
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  in earnest, and turn it into a dispute or secret. Troublesome things must
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  not be taken too seriously, if they can be avoided. It is preposterous
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  to take to heart that which you should throw over your shoulders. Much that
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  would be something has become nothing by being left alone, and what was nothing
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  has become of consequence by being made much of. At the outset, things
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  can be easily settled, but not afterwards. Often the remedy causes the disease
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  tis by no means the least of life's rules to let things alone one hundred
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  twenty two. Distinction in speech and action. By this you gain a position
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  in many places, and carry esteem beforehand. It shows itself in everything,
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  in talk, in look, even in gait. It is a great victory
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  to conquer men's hearts. It does not arise from any foolish presumption or pompous
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  talk, but in a becoming tone of authority, born of superior talent combined
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  with true merit one hundred twenty three avoid affectation. The more merit the less
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  affectation, which gives a vulgar flavor to all. It is wearisome to others
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  and troublesome to the one affected, for he becomes a martyr to care and
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  tortures himself with attention. The most eminent merits lose most by it, for
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  they appear proud and artificial instead of being the product of nature. And the
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  natural is always more pleasing than the artificial. One always feels sure that the
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  man who affects a virtue has it not. The more pains you take with
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  a thing, the more should you conceal them, so that it may appear
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  to arise spontaneously from your own natural character. Do not, however, in
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  avoiding affectation, fall into it by affecting to be unaffected. The sage never
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  seems to know his own merits, for only by not noticing them can you
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  call others attention to them. He is twice great, who has all the
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  perfections in the opinions of all, except of himself. He attains applause by
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  two opposite paths one hundred twenty four. Get yourself missed. Few reach such
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  favor with the many, if with the wise,'tis the height of happiness
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  when one has finished one's work. Coldness is the general rule. But there
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  are ways of earning this reward of good will. The sure way is to
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  excel in your office and talents. Add to this agreeable manner, and you
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  reach the point where you become necessary to your office, not your office to
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  you. Some do honor to their post with others. Tis the other way.
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  It is no great gain if a poor successor makes the predecessor seem good,
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  for this does not imply that the one is missed, but that the
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  other is wished away one hundred and twenty five. Do not be a blacklist.
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  It is a sign of having a tarnished name to concern oneself with the
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  ill fame of others. Some wish to hide their own stains with those of
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  others, or at least wash them away, Or they seek consolation. Therein
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  tis the consolation of fools. They must have bad breath, who form the
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  sewers of scandal for the whole town. The more one grubs about in such
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  matters, the more one befouls oneself. There are few without stain somewhere or
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  other. But it is of little known people that the failings are little be
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  careful, then, to avoid being a registrar of faults, that is,
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  to be an abominable thing a man that lives without a heart. One hundred
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  and twenty six. Folly consists not in committing folly, but in not hiding
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  it. When committed, you should keep your desires sealed up. Still more,
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  your defects all go wrong sometimes, but the wise try to hide the
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  errors, but fools boast of them. Reputation depends more on what is hidden
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  than on what is done. If a man does not live chastely, he
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  must live cautiously. The errors of great men are like the eclipses of the
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  greater lights. Even in friendship, it is rare to expose one's failings to
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  one's friend. Nay, one should conceal them from one's self if one can.
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  But here one can help with that other their great rule of life,
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  learn to forget one hundred and twenty seven. Grace in everything tis the life
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  of talents, the breath of speech, the soul of action, and the
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  ornament of ornament. Perfections are the adornment of our nature. But this is
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  the adornment of perfection itself. It shows itself even in the thoughts. Tis
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  most a gift of nature and owes least to education. It even triumphs over
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  training. It is more than ease, approaches the free and easy, gets
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  over embarrassment, and adds the finishing touch to perfection. Without it, beauty
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  is lifeless, graciousness ungraceful. It surpasses valor, discretion, prudence, even
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  majesty. Itself tis a short way to dispatch and an easy escape from embarrassment
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  one hundred and twenty eight. High mindedness one of the principal qualifications for a
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  gentleman, for it spurs on to all kinds of nobility. It improves the
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  taste, ennobles the heart, elevates the mind, refines the feelings, and
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  intensifies dignity. It raises him in whom it is found, and at times
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  remedies the bad turns of fortune, which only raises by striking. It can
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  find full scope in the will when it cannot be exercised in act. Magnanimity,
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  generosity, and all heroic qualities recognize in it their source one hundred twenty
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  nine. Never complain. To complain always brings discredit. Better be a model
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  of self reliance opposed to the passion of others than an object of their compassion,
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  for it opens the way for the hearer to what we are complaining of,
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  and to disclose one insult forms an excuse use for another. By complaining
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  of past offenses, we give occasion for future ones, and in seeking aid
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  or counsel, we only obtain indifference or contempt. It is much more politic
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  to praise one man's favors so that others may feel obliged to follow suit.
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  To recount the favors we owe the absent is to demand similar ones from the
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  present, and thus we sell our credit with the one to the other.
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  The shrewd will therefore never publish to the world his failures or his defects,
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  but only those marks of consideration which serve to keep friendship alive an enmity silent.
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  One hundred and thirty do and be seen doing. Things do not pass
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  for what they are, but for what they seem to be of use.
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  And to know how to show yourself of use is to be twice as useful.
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  What is not seen is as if it was not. Even. The
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  right does not receive proper consideration if it does not seem right. The observant
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  are far fewer in number than those who are deceived by appearances. Deceit rules
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  the roast, and things are judged by their jackets, and many things are
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  other than they seem. A good exterior is the best recommendation of the inner
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  perfection. End of Section fifteen.