Latest / The Career Mentor Podcast with Fexingo: Finding Mentors, Sponsors, and Career Advisors / The Mentor Gap Across Generations
Transcript
- Lucas: So I was looking at a Deloitte survey from late last year, and one number really jumped out: 68 percent of Gen Z workers said they prefer informal, on-demand mentoring — just grabbing coffee or sending a quick message — versus only 42 percent of Boomers who felt the same way. Luna: That's a pretty big split. What do Boomers prefer then — the formal sit-down once a quarter? Lucas: Exactly. The same survey found that 55 percent of Boomers prefer scheduled, structured mentoring with clear goals and an agenda. So you've got two groups sitting in the same company, often the same team, with completely different expectations about how mentoring should even work. Luna: And I bet neither side is really talking about it. The Gen Z employee thinks they're being proactive by sending a Slack message, and the Boomer mentor feels like it's too casual or even disrespectful. Lucas: Right. And that's the real problem — not a lack of willingness, but a mismatch in format. I've seen this play out at a Fortune 500 tech firm where the senior engineers, mostly Boomers and Gen X, expected mentees to book time on their calendar with a specific agenda. The new hires, mostly Gen Z, just wanted to ping them with quick questions. Neither approach is wrong, but without a conversation about it, both sides end up frustrated. Luna: So how do you bridge that? Do you just tell the Gen Z person to adapt to the Boomer's style? Or should the older generation be more flexible? Lucas: I think it has to be a two-way street. But the onus is usually on the more senior person to set the terms, because they're the one with less time and more experience. So a practical first step is for the mentor to say, 'Here's how I like to communicate — I prefer an email with three bullet points, then we can schedule a 30-minute call.' That gives structure without being rigid. Luna: That makes sense. And the mentee can also be explicit about what they need — like, 'I just need 10 minutes to run an idea by you, can we do a quick chat?' It's about finding a middle ground. Lucas: Yeah. And one trend that's been fascinating is reverse mentoring — where the junior person mentors the senior one on something like digital trends or Gen Z consumer behavior. That flips the power dynamic and makes both sides more open to adapting. Luna: That's a great point. I've seen companies like Procter & Gamble and Unilever run formal reverse mentoring programs. The senior exec gets a younger mentor who helps them understand TikTok or sustainability expectations. And the junior person gets visibility and a sponsor. Lucas: Exactly. It's not just about skills transfer — it's about building mutual respect. Once the senior leader sees that the junior person has real expertise, they're more likely to take their career concerns seriously. Luna: And that respect is crucial for sponsorship — where someone advocates for you when you're not in the room. Lucas: Before we dive deeper into that, I want to mention something about the show itself. You know, we've been doing this podcast for a while now, and one thing we're proud of is that we don't run ads. No sponsors, no commercial breaks. It's just us, talking about careers. Luna: Yeah, and that's only possible because of listeners who chip in. If this show has ever helped you think through a career move or a tough conversation, you can support it at buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. Lucas: It's a simple way to keep the podcast ad-free and focused on what matters — helping each other navigate our careers. No pressure, but if it's added value for you, we appreciate it. Luna: Totally. And it really does make a difference. So, back to that respect piece — how do you build it when there's a generation gap? Lucas: I think one key is to acknowledge the gap directly. Say something like, 'I know we might have different communication styles, but I want to make this work. Can we agree on how often we check in?' That simple acknowledgment can defuse a lot of tension. Luna: And it shows the mentee that the mentor is invested in the relationship, not just going through the motions. Lucas: Exactly. I also think mentors should be explicit about what they can and can't offer. A Boomer mentor might say, 'I can help you navigate organizational politics, but I'm not the person to ask about the latest social media trends — for that, let me connect you with someone on the marketing team.' That sets boundaries and shows self-awareness. Luna: That's actually really helpful for the mentee too — they know exactly who to go to for what. It's like building a personal board of advisors, which we talked about in episode 8. Lucas: Right. And I think generational differences also show up in how people give and receive feedback. Boomers often prefer direct, constructive criticism delivered in person. Gen Z tends to want more frequent, smaller feedback — often through digital channels — and they value positive reinforcement. Luna: So if a Gen Z mentee is used to getting 'likes' and quick reactions, they might interpret a Boomer mentor's silence as disapproval, when really the mentor just thinks everything is fine and doesn't need to say anything. Lucas: That's a huge source of miscommunication. I've coached managers to say, 'If you don't hear from me, it means you're on the right track. If I have concerns, I'll reach out.' That sets expectations so the mentee isn't anxiously waiting for feedback. Luna: And for the mentee, it's okay to ask — 'How am I doing? Can you give me a quick thumbs up if I'm good?' That's not annoying, it's just a different communication style. Lucas: Absolutely. And companies are starting to catch on. I read about a financial services firm that redesigned its mentoring program to include both structured monthly meetings and an optional Slack channel for quick questions. Participation went up 40 percent year-over-year. Luna: That's a smart hybrid model. It gives the Boomers their agenda-driven meetings and the Gen Z employees their on-demand access. Lucas: And it's not just about age. The same dynamics can play out between any two people with different communication preferences. But age is a useful shorthand because it often correlates with different workplace norms. Luna: So what's one actionable takeaway for someone listening who's about to start a mentoring relationship across a generational gap? Lucas: Have an upfront conversation about format. Spend the first five minutes of your first meeting talking about how you want to communicate — frequency, channel, agenda style. Don't assume the other person shares your preference. Luna: And be willing to adjust as you go. Maybe you start with monthly formal meetings, but after a few months you realize quick check-ins work better. Lucas: Exactly. The best mentoring relationships evolve. And if you can bridge the generation gap, you'll likely learn as much from each other about different perspectives as you do about the specific career advice. Luna: That's a great note to end on. Thanks for listening, and we'll catch you next time on The Career Mentor Podcast.