Latest / Respark Your Life / EP349: Jo-Anne Ross - Dementia - What To Do

Transcript

EP349: Jo-Anne Ross - Dementia - What To Do · Respark Your Life

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You're overwhelmed, you're stressed, you don't know what's going on, you're scared,
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: you don't understand, and this person behaves nothing like the person that you've loved
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: your entire life.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Hello, this is Raymond Ayer, New York Times top 10 bestselling author, bringing you Respark
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: Your Life podcast, the world's premier podcast to ignite the fire to allow you to live life
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: on your own terms.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: single Thursday I bring you a multi-millionaire world famous celebrity to teach you about
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: the most fascinating ways in order to live a far better life.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Every single Thursday you just need to subscribe by hitting the subscribe button.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: I'll see you every Thursday to re-spark your life.
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: Yes, this is Raymond Aaron, New York Times top ten bestselling author and interviewer
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: of the Respark Your Life podcast.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: And I always bring you guests
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: that give you uplifting insights, but not today.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: Today, I'm gonna bring you a topic that's a bit depressing,
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: but you'd better learn about it
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: 'cause it's getting bigger and bigger and bigger.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: And it's dementia.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: An aunt of mine died of dementia.
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: It was my first experience with it.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: And right now a very close family member has dementia.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: And it's sad.
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: And I think that it is growing, growing, growing rapidly
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: since the end of the Second World War,
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: but that's not my job to be the interviewee.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: So let me introduce her to you
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: and then she will answer my questions.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: Joanne Ross is known as the dementia with dignity champion.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: She's an international speaker, teacher, coach,
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: and two times international bestselling author.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Joanne spent nine months as the sole caregiver
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: for her mother, supporting her
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: through the early stages of dementia.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: In the years that followed, Joanne's experiences
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: with her mom lit a burning desire for change.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: She's designed the Shea Juliet Dementia Village
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: and Wellness Community, and is currently working
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: on her fourth book, "Dementia, A Survival Guide
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: for Families and Caregivers."
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Joanne also provides enriching programs and coaching
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: for the families and caregivers of dementia sufferers.
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: She is proud to guide you to your best self,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: healed and prepared to offer compassionate care to others.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: Wow, Joanne, did you hear all that?
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: - That's amazing, I wanna meet this person.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: - I know, but the downside is you have to live up
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: to all of that.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: - No problem.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: - There is a word in the intro that shocked me
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: because it says cure, healed.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Can you heal dementia?
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: - No, you can't heal dementia.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: - It says healed.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: - I know, but you can certainly heal the caregivers
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: and family members so that you can be
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: in a better position to give from a full cup
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: as opposed to giving from an empty vessel.
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: - Okay, okay.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: So I wanna start the interview way back.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: - Okay.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: - When you were a kid,
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: did you have any association with dementia?
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Did you have any trial in your life
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: that shocked you into being the person you are today?
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: Like what got you into it?
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: Like in my life, I didn't grow up to be a dementia champion.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: What happened in your life?
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: - Well, this little CPA
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: used to go visit her grandfather
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: when she was in her 20s and go play cribbage with him.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: So we had regular games of cribbage.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I am so blessed, I have the best family in the world.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: So I would go and visit my grandfather
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: in his personal care home.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: And one week I walked through the door
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: and he had no idea who I was.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: And my poor little heart just shattered
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: in a million pieces.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: And that was my first exposure to dementia.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: And it's soul crushing, there's no other word.
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: For families and for caregivers alike, it's soul crushing.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: - Yes, I remember my first experience
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: about the same age as you, my poor aunt didn't know anybody.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: And so her son, my cousin, installed a logbook.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: And so we sat on the side of her bed and talked to her
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: and wrote in the logbook
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: and then read other family members who had visited.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: But it seemed a shame.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: It was, I had this horrible dichotomy in my mind.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: On one hand, I wanted her to live
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: and be the aunt that I loved.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: On the other hand, I wanted her to die
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: so I wouldn't have to visit every week.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: (laughing)
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: - 'Cause it hurts.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: - She didn't know me.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: - And she didn't know you, I know, yeah.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: - I felt horrible wishing her death.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: (laughing)
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: I didn't know what to do.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: - I know, and you are not alone.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: There are so many people who feel exactly that same way.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: And that has ramifications for you,
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: for you when you get home,
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: because you may remember
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: that you would be emotionally drained.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: You were physically drained.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: Sometimes people go at lunchtime, then go back to work.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: Do you think those people are very productive at work?
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: - Oh my gosh.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: Right? And if you're trying to care for that person at home, you're overwhelmed, you're
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: stressed, you don't know what's going on, you're scared, you don't understand. And this
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: person behaves nothing like the person that you've loved your entire life. So all those
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: things have huge drains on the economy. And we also try a million things before we try
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: what works, right? So we're wasting our time, we're wasting
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: resources. Just it's like a never ending, sad cycle, but it
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: doesn't have to be an ever ending sad cycle. That's the
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: key.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: Okay, before we get into the key of how to help, let's talk about
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: how big this issue is. Because I'm guessing that since the end
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: of the Second World War, the incidence of dementia has
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: skyrocketed.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: So the last time I checked, 0.7% of the world's population,
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: now stop and think about that.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: There's 8 billion people in the world.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: That's a lot of people.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: And for every one person that has dementia,
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: there's two or three people who are caregivers,
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: or people who are touched.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: So you have to think of all of these people
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: who are exactly what we talked about
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: stressed, afraid, anxious, maybe even to the point of being suicidal because I can't do this anymore.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: Like it has huge impacts on the workplace, on family life, on friendships.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: You have brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers who want to treat people,
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: who have different ideas of how to treat people.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: I was, again, I was so blessed.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: My brother and I love each other.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: would trust him with my life. Actually, I do because he's the
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: one whoever who's going to unplug me if ever we get there.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: But we had very different ideas about how to do things. But we
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: respected each other enough to talk through them. Sometimes he
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: won. Sometimes I won. It was always in the best interest of
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: our mom. But not all families are like that.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: I need to know is it getting worse? Are there more?
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yes. Because we were, we were living in a world where we're killing ourselves.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Yes. We have microplastics floating through our bodies that come from the air, the water
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: and the earth. We have food that is pure crap for us. We eat horribly. Our I don't want
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: get in any trouble here. But our National Food Guide is upside down. Right? Like it
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: needs to be flipped on its head. Yes. Even even when we're eating the way we've been
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: taught to eat, we're eating wrong. And dementia is also known as type three diabetes. Oh,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: take a look at the label of almost anything you eat. There is some kind of sugar in there.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: sugar, fructose, corn, like it just goes on and on and on. We're poisoning ourselves. So of course,
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: dementia is just going to keep getting worse and worse and worse and worse.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: Yes. Now, I heard a lecture recently, in which the lecturer said that here are the top seven
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: ways to prevent dementia. And he went from seven, six, five, four, three, two. And he said, you know
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: what, you can throw all those in the garbage. Because way number one, to prevent it is bigger
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: than all those others combined by a big multiple and it's just walking. Just walking. What's your
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: take on that? You know what's really funny? Okay, I have to think about this for 10 seconds.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: I offer workshops for caregivers and family members. It's a seven week workshop. It's built
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: on a methodology that I developed. It's called Me First. We go through seven different aspects of
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: health, which looks at physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health. So we look at mind power,
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: emotional intelligence, flow and ebb, instincts and intuition, restricting beliefs, spirituality,
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: signs, symbols, synchronicities, and the total package, which is for mind and body. And I'm
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: telling you this because in two different every week, I also, I am not a doctor, I am not a nurse,
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: I am a CPA by trade. So the things that I know, I've known through my research, I've known through
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: my experience, I know through my story. So I never claimed to be an expert on dementia. But
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: I found it incredibly interesting that one week I talked about physical activity. And another week,
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: I talked about keeping social interactions going and keeping your mind occupied.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: And the effects of both of those were identical.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: I didn't need to change the next slide, which talked about the benefits.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: And those are the benefits to your brain.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: So your brain gets incredible hormones released.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry, but I can't remember them off the top of my head when you simply walk.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: So you know, we keep telling people, do these exercises that challenge your mind and yes,
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: absolutely 100% but you get the identical benefits from going for a walk.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: You want to multiply that by 10, go for a walk in nature.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Oh, really?
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: nature is the greatest healer of all. She's a smart girl, you
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: know.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: Air is clearer, cleaner. Is that what you mean?
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: No, it just the physical being in nature has incredible
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: benefits for your mind, body and soul. Here's something
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: interesting that I heard on a podcast. I listened to Mel
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: Robbins. I love Mel Robbins. She's brilliant. She has people
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: from all over the world, much like you,
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: who have so much to share.
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: And there is a scientific study
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: that if you listen to a bird, a bird call,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: for even a second, it has a soothing impact
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: on your automatic nervous system for eight hours.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: - Oh my gosh.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: - Isn't that crazy?
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: But you know what?
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: I think I figured it out.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: I think I figured it out.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: Okay, tell me if this makes sense to you.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: So a thousand million years ago,
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: we were very in tune with nature, weren't we?
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: We had to be, or we were going to die.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: - Yes.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: - So when the birds are singing,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: you're calm, you're relaxed.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: You know why?
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: 'Cause there's no predators around.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: What happens as soon as predators show up?
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Everything is quiet in the forest.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: - Oh, of course.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: - Does that make sense to you?
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: - Yeah.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: I think that's our reptilian brain going,
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: so long as the birds are singing, you're safe.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: So relax and enjoy.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: - This makes me happy because number one,
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: I walk and I live way out in the country.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: So I walk in the country,
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: I have no option because I'm in the country.
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: - Beautiful.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: - I hear birds singing all the time.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: And one of the things that my wife and I love to do
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: as soon as we wake up in the morning,
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: is we have a door onto our porch.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: So we open that door and all of a sudden
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: bird songs come flooding in.
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: And the other thing I graduated many, many years ago
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: as a physicist and a mathematician.
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: And today I still love doing extremely difficult
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: math problems.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: (laughing)
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: - We are kindred spirits.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: When I was in high school and we took calculus,
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: I used to be so excited to go home and do homework
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: Everybody's like, "Oh my God, she's lost it."
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: (laughing)
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: So I totally understand what you mean.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, to me, it's a puzzle.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: It's this big, complicated, beautiful puzzle
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: and you have to use your brain.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: - Now I'm addressing my dear subscribers.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: You might wonder why I chose dementia,
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: which is not a very uplifting topic.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: And the answer is because you might have had dementia
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: in your life, not you personally, but around you.
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: And you maybe didn't know what the heck to do.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: And hopefully this podcast will help you.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: Or if you're fortunate enough
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: that you haven't experienced it yet, you will.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: You will and you'll need to know what to do.
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: And that's the purpose of this.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: Now, in your years of working with dementia patients
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: and also their families and caregivers,
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: what's the most startling realization that you've had?
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: - I'm so glad you said that
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: There's two things I wanted to say.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: - Okay.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: - And the first one was,
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: if you have any inkling of somebody in your life
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: who starting to act a little odd,
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: whose moods seem to be a little bit off,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: or whose memory doesn't seem to be what it is,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: the first thing I want you to do,
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: pay close attention to this,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: is get a test for a urinary tract infection.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: Let me say that again.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: a urinary tract infection.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: - What?
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: - The symptoms mimic dementia.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: There are so many people who have been misdiagnosed
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: when all it was was a simple infection.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: - Oh, men or women?
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: - Both.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: - Wow.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: - So, one.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: - So, if it's dementia, it's probably not.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: - Well, let's not say probably.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: Let's cross that off the list
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: before you do anything else and panic, right?
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: And of course, the older you get,
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: the more susceptible you are to UTIs.
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: That's another thing to keep in mind.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: That's nothing you've done wrong.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: It's just part of the way our body is built.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: And the longer you leave it, the worse the infection gets.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: The more, right?
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Now you're setting yourself up to all sorts of problems.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: The more antibiotics you're gonna take,
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: you're gonna destroy your microbiome
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: and your gut lining and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: And then you can have that spiral that'll take you down
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: and it might eventually develop into dementia
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: or something else.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: So that's number one.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Number two, every human being on this planet is unique.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: Even if you have a twin, your twin is not like you.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Your twin is different.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Every dementia journey is unique.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: As unique as that person is.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: You can do all the research in the world.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: You can be as diligent a person as anybody else, but you got to listen to your
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: and you got to listen to your intuition, and you got to do what's right for that person in those circumstances.
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: It's very important. Another thing is, the more intelligent the person is, the better they are at disguising it.
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: Oh!
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: Oh! Does that ring true to you?
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm just startled. I think I'm, I'm, I was admitted to Mensa, which is the, to
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: get in, you have to be in the top 2% of IQ in the entire world's population.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: So maybe you should go get your wife so I could chat with her.
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: So so I mean, on purpose, or
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: it's on? Well, it's probably it's I'm gonna say it's a combination of both. So here's
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: Here's an example.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: So my mom would phone me up and she'd go, "Hey, Joanne, how are you today?
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: How's Derek doing?
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: Is he enjoying his courses at the U of M?"
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: So that might've been her before too.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: "Oh, hi, my beautiful girl.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: How are you doing today?
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: Tell me about what my grandchildren are up to."
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: Do you notice the difference?
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: One is very general and the other one is incredibly specific.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: My name disappeared, I became a girl.
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: My son's name disappeared, he became a grandchild.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: The fact that he was in university and which university all disappeared.
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: They'll also use cueing.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: So for example, my mom lived in assisted living complex where they had to go and get their
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: meals on their own.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: So mom was always the kind of person like you go ahead and I'll follow behind.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: just the way she was raised, right? But as she got older, it wasn't only out of politeness,
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: it was to watch what you did. Oh, they grabbed a fork and knife and a... Okay, I need to grab a
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: fork and knife and a spoon. Okay, a napkin. I got a napkin. So the first time I cued into it,
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: haha, cued into it, was that I had gone like more than halfway down the line and I forgot something
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: and I had to go back and get it,
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: well, guess who followed me
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: and went back to get it for herself as well, right?
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: So you gotta pay attention to tiny little things
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: that change.
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: And it's easy, like when you're intelligent
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: and you're able to rationalize and reason
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: and come up with alternative words and alternative things,
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: ways of asking or getting the same thing,
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: then that's what you do.
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: Wow. Well, you are so intriguing. And actually, I do feel uplifted, but I'm not exactly sure why.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: It's my sparkling personality.
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: Now I know that there's some wisdom out there.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: There's things to do. And you are giving it away for free.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, some of it. Absolutely.
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: Let me boast about your website. Free Gift Joe Ross. So free gift is easy to spell. Joe is J O
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: Ross is R O S S. Free gift joeross.com. Yes, you go there. There's a book that you can get
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: at no charge seven things you should know about dementia.
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's a little PDF, and it's got a quiz. So those are the seven things. It's a quiz with
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: seven questions. And there's the answers at the back. There's also some tips and some facts. So
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: just some things to get you started. For example, what is the first thing that disappears? What's
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: one of the first signs of dementia? Should I give away the answer?
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: Hold on, let me think. Nouns.
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: A loss of smell.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: Smell.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: I know, weird, isn't it? Do you know what's even more interesting? My mother had the nose of a dog,
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: she could smell anything. And one of the potential symptoms of dementia is,
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: oh my god, the word has escaped me, where you make something up that isn't real. Oh my god,
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: it's gone. We're just, oh no! I think you got it, lady.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: Oh, anyways, it doesn't matter. But it's something that you imagine that isn't real. I can't believe
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: I can't remember the word. It's okay. For her, it was smell. She made up smells that weren't
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: really there. But the thing is, she really believed they were there. And she really smelled them. It
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: It starts with the letter H. Hallucinations!
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: Yes!
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: Thank you!
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: Hallucinations.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: So my mother had olfactory hallucinations.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Isn't that crazy?
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: - Let me ask you about this.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: It seems to me that if I lost my sense of smell,
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: I could get along perfectly.
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: Like, so what?
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: - Oh, yeah.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: - I wouldn't get value from expensive restaurants,
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: so who cares?
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: But you seem to be saying that it is a canary,
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: that it warns you that the patient
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: might be getting dementia.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: - It could very well be.
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: That's a very good way of putting it.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: But here's the other thing that you have to consider
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: is it doesn't happen overnight.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: It happens little by little by little by little.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: And sometimes you don't even notice, right?
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: - Uh-huh.
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: - Yeah.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: - Wow.
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: Now tell us the book that you most recommend
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: that my subscribers buy.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: - So one that I'm writing right now.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: (laughing)
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: But it's not out yet.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: It's not out yet. So I do have some workshops that I have one more to offer. I'm recording
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: them. I'm going to put them on my website. They're not quite there yet. I've written,
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: co-authored three books, one of them with Les Brown. And I think that is the one that I would
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: recommend the most. So it has. So I was sick and I needed to heal. And so it talks a little
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: bit about my healing journey. And it talks about all the lessons that I learned in my
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: healing journey. And then it talks about my time with my mom. So when I lived with her,
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: and some lessons that she taught me and some lessons that I taught her right until her
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: very deaf.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: But what is the title?
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: The title of the book is Your Story Sells.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Successful Coaching and Les Brown is in this book and there's six other authors and I have
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: met all of them but one and they are incredible women with incredible journeys who have a
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: lot to teach you.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: So this book is actually really good for not just me and not just Mr. Brown, but these
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: other beautiful women as well.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: And you can go to my website, which is savorthemomentinserenity.ca.
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: And savor is written the Canadian way with a U, so S-A-V-O-U-R, the moment in serenity.
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: And at the end of my chapter, I have a poem that I wrote while my mom was ill.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: So I would come back in my car after visiting with her, and I just jot a few things down.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: So I really wrote this poem over years.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: And it started off before the pandemic.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: During the pandemic, which this is heart wrenching, due to a miscommunication, I did not see my
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: my mother for a year.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: - Oh, goodness.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: - My mother lived in solitude for a year.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: 23 and a half hours of every single day
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: was spent in her room by herself.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: - Oh, goodness.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: - She went from a woman who I literally had to run down
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: the hall and chase to a woman in a wheelchair.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: It was terrible.
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: And then it also talks about after the pandemic.
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: And I didn't realize it at the time,
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: but I will say my dear mother,
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: once she has left made me realize
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: that that poem shows what it's like
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: for the person with dementia as well.
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: - Wow.
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: - Yeah, so I really, I didn't realize that.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: So I read it at her funeral.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: I've read it a couple of times speaking on stage
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: and that's the beauty of that poem
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: is that you get a little bit of an idea
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: what it's like for them as well.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: And that's in your book entitled?
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: - Your Story Sells, Successful Poaching.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah. - Great.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: So go to both of her websites
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: and enjoy all the value there.
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: Buy her book and enjoy that poem.
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: It has been remarkable speaking with you.
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: It's been more uplifting than depressing,
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: which was my fear. (laughing)
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: It didn't come to pass.
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: So you're a terrific healer in that regard.
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: - Oh, thank you, Raymond.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: It has been such a pleasure
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: having the honor to speak with you.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: And I heard you the other day say how old you were.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: I would have never guessed in a million years.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: You are very- - I'm 80.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: I'm 80.
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: - But it's just a number.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: It's just a number.
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: You certainly don't look your 80 years.
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: And I love the name of your podcast,
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: Respark Your Life.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: But isn't it the truth, at any point in time,
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: it's all within us.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: You can respark your life at any time
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: and make it mean something, right?
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: And not always just for you,
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: but to be of service to others.
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: So beautiful, I love it.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: - Joanne, I tell people that I'm 80 years old,
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: but only 55 US.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: (laughing)
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: I really like that. My conversion rate is way bigger. I just turned 62 and oh, it's
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: almost the I'm 16 on the inside. Like that's totally where I am stuck.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much.
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: Well, I sure hope you enjoyed that fascinating episode. Please make sure you subscribe and
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: And please tell your friends if you like it, that they will probably like it as well.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: For your information, this experience, this service, this podcast has been sponsored by
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: the Orbit Coaching Program.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: All of my friends, all my world famous speaker friends, all have coaching programs.
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: Mine has been independently rated as the number one high level coaching program.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: You cannot purchase it.
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: You have to audition for it by me personally.
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: If you're interested, please email me at respark@aaron.com.
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: Respark at A-A-R-O-N.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: Say that you're interested in being considered for the Orbit Coaching Program and include
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: your cell phone number so that I personally will call you back.