Latest / 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids. / How to Deal with Father Wounds in the Church

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How to Deal with Father Wounds in the Church · 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids.

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of the Five Minute Parenting Podcast.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Karen Ferguson, wife, mom, grandmom, and children's book author with a background in K-8 education and a passion for equipping parents to raise confident and God-confident kids.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: In this podcast, we'll cover parenting practices from both a practical view and a biblical view.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Our goal is to help you raise kids with a positive, godly self-image so they can become all they were created to be.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: I know you're busy, so we'll keep it short.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Let's take just five minutes and dive in.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, listeners.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: Today I'm talking about an important issue in the church that affects people of all ages and every family.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Some call it the father absence crisis, and it has a significant effect on our culture.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: When I was writing my book on well-being many years ago, I came across a startling statistic that hasn't changed much.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: According to the U.S.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: Census Bureau, one in four children live without their biological father in the home.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: A father's absence is present in nearly all of America's problems, such as poverty, teen pregnancy, crime, incarceration, and drug abuse.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: The positive presence of a father in the home, however, is critical to the development of strong families and confident, competent children.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: I know there are many personal, complex situations that have contributed to single-parent homes, but today I'm talking about a father absence crisis in the church, as I've talked to so many people who have a hard time connecting to Father God.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's not that our heavenly father is absent, but that we fail to connect with him.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: The Bible teaches that God is a triune being, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, three distinct but co-equal and co-eternal persons in the Godhead.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: I think for many it can be easier to connect with Jesus because the New Testament is filled with historical accounts of him demonstrating his goodness, love, and compassion towards people like us.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: The Bible says that Jesus was a friend to sinners and that the common people heard him gladly.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: He slept, he ate, laughed, cried, worked, and sometimes got angry, just like us.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: This makes him relatable.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: But the father, not as much.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's far too easy to get stuck in an Old Testament mindset where we view the Father as holy but harsh.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes we might approach him from a purely emotional perspective, based on past experiences with people who've hurt us deeply, whether that be in the church or even from our own imperfect earthly fathers.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: But Jesus said, When we see him, we see the Father.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: John 14 9 says, Jesus replied, Do you even yet know who I am, Philip?
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: Even after all this time I've been with you?
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_00: So why are you asking to see him?
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, Jesus said he could only do what he sees the Father doing in John 5 19.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: He said the Son can do nothing by himself.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: And in the same way.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: This means when we see Jesus' love, patience, grace, and selfless sacrifice poured out on the pages of the Bible, we see the heart of the Father.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: A perfect illustration of the Father's love is found in Luke 15, 11 to 32, and it's one of my very favorite accounts.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Here was a selfish son who abandoned his father, took his property and spent it on wild parties and prostitutes in a distant country.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: Only after much pain and poverty did this son decide to go back to his father and ask for forgiveness.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: He was out of money and out of options, so he was willing to bear the punishment of his father, and expected only to work for him as a servant.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: But the Bible paints such a beautiful picture of the father's love.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: It says in Luke 15, 20, So he got up and went to his father.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: He ran to his son, threw his arms around him, and kissed him.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: Soak that in for a moment.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: The father had been watching and waiting for his son to come home.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: He was looking for him.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And when his son did return, the father didn't chastise him and keep him with a load of guilt.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: He ran and embraced him.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: He even threw a celebration party.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: That is unconditional love.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: And that is the sort of love the Father has for you and me.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: He doesn't condemn or reject us, reject us, he pursues us.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: He wants to call us his own.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: Personally, my relationship with God was transformed when I learned to know the Father's love on a deeper level.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: Without a doubt, when we seek to understand and accept the Father's unconditional love, we'll enjoy greater peace and emotional stability, no matter what is going on around us.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: And we'll be healthier, stronger parents, able to set a powerful example for our children who also have to learn about the Father's love.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: So my prayer for you is that you would draw near to Heavenly Father today.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: One of the ways to begin that is by saturating yourself in the Word of God.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: I encourage you to read through John 14 many times, as this text refers to God as our Father more than 20 times.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: Read it aloud and consider if your view of Him needs to change.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: I also have a few helpful suggestions and resources that I'll link to in the show notes.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: So be sure to check that out.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, God is not an absent father.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: I pray this episode is an encouragement to you.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: If you have any questions about this topic, please reach out.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: You can contact me by visiting my website at Karen Ferg.com.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: Until next time, have a blessed week.