Latest / BECOME Empowered / Why You Don't Need More Stages — You Need a Clearer Message | Marta Spirk
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- SabineKvenberg.com: Is there a pattern that you see when you work with your clients, that is similar or it's a pattern? Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I would say one of the most common ones is not having the belief that they have something valuable to say, like something novel. And it stems from what we were just talking about. It doesn't have to be, I climbed Mount Everest, right? Because that's what people are drawn to. Obviously, if you did, let's leverage that experience. But if you did not, I'm sure there is something that we can pull from a pivotal moment, an epiphany. Whatever it may be that you went through that got you here that will add to your credibility and to your expertise to help people see you as a thought leader and somebody that they would like to follow. So that's one of the patterns. And I think the other pattern, SabineKvenberg.com: Welcome Marta. I'm so happy to have you here on my show today. Marta Spirk: Thank you so much. I'm excited for us to chat. SabineKvenberg.com: we both have experience from the entertainment industry, singing, acting, and so forth. And now we both teach and work with women to help them with their presentation skill and signature talk. how did you start in the entertainment industry? Was it always something you wanted to do? Marta Spirk: It was. I was the one that was walking around with the boombox back in my day, dating myself, with SabineKvenberg.com: Ha ha. Marta Spirk: you know, going through room to room in the house, planting myself and saying, I'm going to be performing now. I will be singing and dancing. So you need to watch me. So I've been doing that since I can remember, three, four years old. I was doing that. but the official beginnings of it is my mom. is has been the huge role model and inspiration because from a young age actually she started playing the accordion. She was almost like professional level and then she ditched it and started the guitar. And she started ministering in churches and then in people's homes singing and playing the guitar to the point where she eventually started her own church. So I would see my mom doing that and I was inspired and I was always singing anyway. So I picked up the piano in my late teens and then I would perform with her and also by myself in church. So that's where it all started. It was because of her, but also at in church. Once I was started taking lessons, voice lessons and piano lessons, I would do recitals as part of like the school that I was a part of. But eventually, especially after I got married, so all of that was in Brazil, that's where I'm from. But eventually I married my American husband and moved to the US. And then I started performing here locally and it started with a national anthem of all things. And then opportunities started coming where I would, you know, sing the national anthem for large sporting events. I've sung for the majority of pro teams here in Denver, in Colorado. And then I started doing sets. I released my own music as well in the last few years. I just kept pursuing it. SabineKvenberg.com: what let you change to go from performing and singing now coaching women. Marta Spirk: Yeah, so simultaneously with the music, what I was pursuing in terms of my degrees and my career, even back in Brazil, was languages. So, and also with a huge influence of the church. I'd always been drawn to the American culture and the English language. We learned it in school, right? There's huge influence of music and movies. But my mom started receiving American ministers in her church. And I would communicate with them in English eventually. people started asking me, can you help me learn? So I started tutoring, getting paid for it while while I was still in high school and then helping my mom, translating materials, newsletters, and things like that to the point where when I was 18, which was about the time that I started college, I was appointed as the interpreter. So I would be interpreting for the ministers as they would do large conferences down in Brazil hosted by my mom. And so I started pursuing that as my career path. I Did my bachelor's in translation, then I did my master's here in American Linguistics. So that was my background was teaching, translating, interpreting, which now looking back, I see it was relaying other people's messages. But then plot twist, the huge, you know, parting of waters was in 2016 I had triplets. So that was a huge, you know, turning point. And I right and I SabineKvenberg.com: Would say. Marta Spirk: really started feeling the pull. To do more mentorship, which I had been doing as a teacher, but it was just different because it was more like on a psychological encouraging level, you know, instead of teaching a language, starting to help especially women with the process of pursue your dreams, go after the things that you want. And a lot of that translated into entrepreneurship, right? You have gifts, start your business, or if you already started your business, start getting more visible, which was really side by side with my journey as I was getting more visible with my gifts and doing what I was doing. And so that's when I started my coaching business. And as I published my first book, did a TED talk, I started positioning myself more as a thought leader and as a speaker. And then the last several years is when I've been focusing more on helping women with the stage and with speaking. SabineKvenberg.com: What was your TEDx talk about? Marta Spirk: So the title was or is The Transformational Power of Defeat. And SabineKvenberg.com: Mm. Marta Spirk: originally when I pitched it, I I pitched it as the Transformational Power of Grief, talking about grieving my older identity or the idea I had for myself going into the future. And a lot of it had to do with having triplets, right? The SabineKvenberg.com: Mm. Marta Spirk: the idea I had for my life as a woman, as a mother, was very different from what ended up happening. And so that's. Eventually once I got into it, they were like, Well, grief people associated not necessarily grieving and identity, but more so life. So let's change it to defeat. And I actually feel like that's a better fit because I'm a very competitive person. SabineKvenberg.com: Ha ha. Marta Spirk: So talking about feeling defeated, right? When life throws you a curveball and you don't know what to do with it, I talk about seeing challenges as silver linings and invitations to see what you're made of. SabineKvenberg.com: yeah, yeah, what you just said was interesting. You said you are very competitive by nature, which is good because that always brings us to the next best level of ourselves. I wanted to bring that up because Also being and having the background in church, we know that there's an abundance of everything. Marta Spirk: Right. SabineKvenberg.com: And and I'm I'm just reading a book called The Abundance Book, right? By Marta Spirk: Mm. SabineKvenberg.com: by John Randolph Price. And I love it because he talks about the the abundance that that we have, and of course goes deeper into this topic. But what I often hear people say. Is for example, why would you bring Marta on your podcast? I'm just making it up, right? Marta Spirk: Hmm. Yeah, yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: She she is doing the same, she has the same, she works with women, she is about storytelling and bringing out the best and helping women create the signature talk, and you do the same thing. So why why do you do that? And Course, you also invited me to be part of your podcast. But Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: I would like to get your take on it because Marta Spirk: Hm. SabineKvenberg.com: I believe there's abundance and there is no such thing as if I have you part of my universe, that it would diminish what I would get. And Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: I think people get that so wrong. So I would love Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: to get to get your take on it. Marta Spirk: Yes, absolutely. Well, from you know a biblical perspective, which even though we know sometimes it's hard to accept, especially as a competitive person, but I, you know, I try to remind myself of that. There is a passage that says they were all pieces of a of the body of Christ, right? And if you think about that analogy, that is very true. Even though you have two eyes, they don't do the same thing because they have a different perspective and they can't replace each other, right? Or if you were to compare different organs. They all have a specific function and one is not less than the other. We need everybody because we come from different backgrounds and we add different things. But then from you know a storytelling perspective, which is the world that I operate in, we all have different backgrounds and we all have a different angle and a perspective. So even somebody that's doing the same exact thing, they're ti actually not because they do it differently. They have, you know, a different life experience. They come from a different generation, from a different culture. So they bring something different to the table. And oftentimes people need to listen to something from a specific person for it to dawn on them. And oftentimes the same person has different coaches on a similar topic because they're at different stages of life. So something that you know you benefited from 10 years ago, probably not gonna do it right now. The infamous what got you here won't get you there. We constantly SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: need different people to open our minds and our eyes in a different way. I was just talking to to a a a friend the other day and I invited him to be a guest expert inside my community. And he's like, we love doing that because even if you're saying the same thing, people kind of stop listening to you. It's like parents and the cool uncle or the cool aunt. SabineKvenberg.com: Yep, yep. Marta Spirk: The cool aunt comes in, says the same exact thing, and all of a sudden it's novel and it's cool. But you've been saying that to your kids the entire time. It's the same thing, right? People need to hear it a variety of times and in different ways for it to land. So there's room for all of that. SabineKvenberg.com: Yes, thank you. Thank you for saying that because it is so true. And and that is when people have the fear, it's just Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: the lack energy is there for them, just you know, Marta Spirk: Yeah, so true. SabineKvenberg.com: and and if I if I give this up or then there's nothing left for me. And that's not true. There is an abundance under this earth. And as you said, we all have different experiences, different backgrounds. Marta Spirk: Yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: I mean, how many people are there who talk about storytelling or to talk about signature talk or whatever it Marta Spirk: Thanks. SabineKvenberg.com: is, right? And there are so many coaches, but there they are also so many people. We are all different. And some person flocks to you and another per person flocks to me and another person flocks to a third person. So Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: the main message for everyone who is listening. Never ever think that there is lack in this world. There's really not. You have Marta Spirk: There isn't. SabineKvenberg.com: been given a gift, you have been given a talent, and when you take the right action and focus on that and focus on the the love and the light that we can all share, but it's also out there. Focus Marta Spirk: Okay. SabineKvenberg.com: on those things. then everything else is it it just fall falls in place. Marta Spirk: Yes, absolutely. There's there's enough for everyone. And the other thing too is we couldn't possibly help all the people in the world. So it's a good thing that there are many of us that do something similar because otherwise people would be missing out. So SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, what would you say if someone's listening now? Is there a pattern that you see when you work with your clients, that is similar or it's a pattern? Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I would say one of the most common ones is not having the belief that they have something valuable to say, like something novel. And it stems from what we were just talking about. It doesn't have to be, I climbed Mount Everest, right? Because that's what people are drawn to. Obviously, if you did, let's leverage that experience. But if you did not, I'm sure there is something that we can pull from a pivotal moment, an epiphany. Whatever it may be that you went through that got you here that will add to your credibility and to your expertise to help people see you as a thought leader and somebody that they would like to follow. So that's one of the patterns. And I think the other pattern, speaking specifically about speaking, is that a lot of people think they just need more stages. They just need more eyeballs. And then that will solve all of their problems. And then typically I come in and I'm like, well, The reason why you're not on more stages is because your messaging is not very clear and people are not as interested. So that's what we SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: go back to. What is the unique factor? What is the secret sauce that makes you you that will make you memorable, make you stand out, so that regardless of what stage you're in, you're leveraging it to the best of ability. Because I you could be on a million stages, but if you're not really clear, people will clap and it'll end there. And we don't want that. We want there to be a follow-up. And you know, longevity to that experience. So I would say those are the most common patterns. SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah, I couldn't agree more. It all comes down to the belief, and that is believing in yourself and that you do have something to share, and it's an a important message. Marta Spirk: Mm. Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: some sometimes what I hear is I don't have a story. Of course you do. You of course you do. You have like thousands of stories, right? And Marta Spirk: Yes. Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: part of is of course when we work with with our clients is to To first of all listen when they start talking, and then Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: that is your story, Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: right? And to their defense, sometimes when we are so close to ourselves Marta Spirk: No yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: and to our story, we don't see it. Marta Spirk: Mm-mm. SabineKvenberg.com: And that's why we have to have an outside person that can Marta Spirk: Mm. SabineKvenberg.com: see it from a bird's eye view. I mean Even we coaches have coaches, and the coaches of the coaches have coaches and so forth, right? Yeah. Very very true. Marta Spirk: yeah. Yeah, absolutely. We need help. SabineKvenberg.com: So when you so take us back to the time where you had your triplets. Because Marta Spirk: Hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: yeah, I am sure that there were many different feelings and situations from getting to know for the first time that these are triplets to the the the the birth. What would you say was your your most shocking moment of that journey? Marta Spirk: I think the most shocking moment was learning that it was triplets because SabineKvenberg.com: Uh-huh. Marta Spirk: I had been on this wavelength. Lots of my friends that were a little bit older were already having kids. And in Brazil, things are a little bit different in in terms of healthcare because C-sections are kind of like the norm. Things have changed over the last few years where more women are advocating for their health. But that's kind of like what people go for. They assume is just that's what we do. We schedule our birth and we we, you know, it's a date on the calendar. And then more women Especially my friends were like, I want an a medicated birth and I want to deliver it naturally and maybe a water birth, maybe a home birth. So I was doing all of that research and I was really gung-ho on. I'm gonna do the best that I can and also have the right practitioners to support me with that dream, you know? SabineKvenberg.com: Mm-hmm. Marta Spirk: So once I learned that, you know, via the scan there were three, kind of like my whole world fell apart because I had plans, okay? Wanted to control everything, which motherhood will show you real quick that that's not how it works. But that was like my first rude awakening. Because I think many moms have that rude awakening maybe at delivery or once the baby comes home. But SabineKvenberg.com: Ha ha. Marta Spirk: for me, it was like five weeks into the pregnancy. It's like, no, Marta, you are not in control anymore. So I want to say the first trimester was the toughest because it was a lot of mixed, it was emotionally draining. It wasn't even the physical. aspects. I actually had pretty easy physical, obviously as as it got further along, I was huge and it was tougher, but I didn't really have morning sickness. I felt fine, especially for having three, because sometimes they say it multiplies, right? If you have twins, it's twice SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: the troubles because of hormones and stuff. But thankfully I didn't have that. It was more so mental and emotional. Like what am I gonna do? Everything that I had in mind is out the window. That's a lot of what I talk about in my TED talk as well. Like You know, natural delivery out the door. Months of exclusively breastfeeding, out the door. They SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: would stay in NICU. That was a given. Like, expect that they will be premature. Like it was just so much in my mind that I was not it's SabineKvenberg.com: Mm. Marta Spirk: not in the what to expect when expecting book. Because it's a high risk pregnancy. You know, it was my first pregnancy, and then all of a sudden I have to factor in all of these other things that are not normal for a young woman, you know, starting a family. So I wanna say that that was That was the hardest. But then once I came to terms with it, because I had to, obviously, it was that switch of now everything that I'm feeling and thinking is transferring into those babies. So I better be SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: mindful, you know? So then I switched. I was like, all right, Marta, you got this. Then I SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: switched over to I want to be as calm as possible and as careful as possible so that they have the best growth opportunity in there. SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Wow. Yeah, I I can o can only imagine. I I have Marta Spirk: Yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: not had children, so I don't even know the whole process from a physical point of view, but I can only Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: imagine the the mental preparation as you just stated is very Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: very different. Now you had three babies crying all at once Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: and Did you have any help with that? And did that whole process also change you as a person? Did you become Marta Spirk: Mm. SabineKvenberg.com: it more more aware kind of was there something that changed within you? Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. So I we had them in Brazil. And that was one of the decisions that we had made because I got married, I moved to America. After I completed my masters, my parents were like, why don't you guys try living closer to us? So that's when I felt like, hmm, let's start trying to have a family. I did not know I was gonna end up with three at a time. But it worked out that was part of the plan that I would be close to my mom to help. through the process. My grandma was alive at the time, so she was there too to hold a baby, an extra set of hands. It was very helpful. And I did hire a nanny for a while to help with the night feedings. so that was really nice. We ended up moving back to America when they were eight months old, which it was still rough, but we were kind of out of that initial six-month craziness of getting the hang of it. so that SabineKvenberg.com: Mm. Marta Spirk: that was good. I feel like I am a very go-with-the-flow, laid-back person in many aspects. And it's interesting because once I moved back to America with the babies, I joined a mothers of multiples group. And the majority, all of them are twin moms, right? Because that's a SabineKvenberg.com: Mm-hmm. Marta Spirk: lot more common. But then I made friends with a local triplet mom whose babies were just 30 days, exactly 30 days older or younger than mine. So we kind SabineKvenberg.com: Mm. Marta Spirk: of got to do life together the last 10 years. We're still close. SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: And she's a lot more uptight and analytical and you know, specific about things. So it's been interesting to see and compare how the triplets came along and they help us in different ways because of our personalities. So for me, it was more like, hey Marta, you need to be on top of things because it's very intense. So you can't just go with the flow. They need to be on a schedule and you need to be prepared ahead of time because if something can go wrong, it will go wrong. And then on her end, it's also it's kind of helped. her kind of loosen up because you can't control everything, you know? So for me, the the big change has been I have had to rely more on schedules and on preparation more than I had before, just because it's more complicated when there's three. SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah, yeah. So when did you decide to start your own business? Marta Spirk: So very crazily enough, I decided to start one month into moving back to America. So we moved back in September and late September, so it was almost October and beginning of November is when I decided to start the coaching online, which was different from the languages. I was still pursuing because that's where my degrees in. So I still doing, you know, some teaching. I got certified with the Courts for interpreting. So I didn't completely give up that side of my life, but I was like, I need something different. And I started when they were very, very small, which sounds crazy, but in a way I'm glad, not only because things take time. So I got a head start, but because they were small, they took naps. I had a little bit more time for myself then that I could start getting organized. And it really helped me get a sense of what it. what it looked like to build something from scratch and network. SabineKvenberg.com: So now that you started your business, you had more time, and was it a hard transition or was it hard to start your own business? What what were the struggles that you went through? Marta Spirk: It was hard in different ways. I think internally it was tough because I had been used to, you know, I I I would excel in things kind of fast from an academic perspective. Always had. Just because of a natural inclination for like languages, it was easy for me. You know, study for a test, pass what's the next level. or even with music, it was something that I grew up with, you know, pursue. And it would happen, but then with business, it wasn't so fast. Also, because I didn't have the clarity on what exactly I was helping people with, and I didn't have the background either. I had experience in other things. So that was a little tough, you know, like understanding the process of I need to go and I need to make find leads and I need to nurture those leads. All of the funnel, all the marketing stuff was not easy. But then the other aspect was my family. They didn't really get it at all. They were like, Why are you going away from what you've already done? Like you have two options. You do what you were doing before or you just stay home with your kids. And I was like, no, third option. I start something completely new. So it didn't make SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: sense from an outside perspective for them, especially because I and I know it was well intentioned. Whereas other people were like, You're amazing. You're doing something different. Go for it. Yeah. But my family was more resistant, which was a little bit. hurtful in a way 'cause I wish they would have supported me, although I understand, but I just kept on going. SabineKvenberg.com: That's it. You kept on going. Keep Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: keep on moving forward. But I understand Marta Spirk: Yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: because family looks at things differently. Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: Because they have, of course, the parents have a way they see their life. Friends Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: have a way they see their life. And that's their their perspective. And they think Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: it has to be the same for you. when when when I told my family that I want to give up the the job, a secure job that I had to Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: start my career in the entertainment industry of becoming an actress, going to school. And I said, no, that this Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: is that that profession, that's very shady sometimes, and you never Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: make money. And they did Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: it f really well well meant Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: of giving me that quote unquote advice. But I did it anyways, right? As you said. And Marta Spirk: Yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: and and you know the the money followed. And most importantly, coming back to what we discussed at the beginning. When we are in the flow and the divine energy is connected and we are connected to our divine energy within that Marta Spirk: Yeah, yeah. SabineKvenberg.com: Christ energy and We use that talent that was given to us in the best way. Again, you still have to take action, you have to learn skills. Even as an entrepreneur, even when I changed from being an actress and performer to becoming a business owner, I had to learn those skills and so Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: forth. We never stop learning, anyways. But yeah, Marta Spirk: Mm-hmm. SabineKvenberg.com: I know what you say. So now You are how many years have you been coaching now? Marta Spirk: So it's gonna be ten years at the end of this year, so almost a decade. SabineKvenberg.com: Well, yes. Yeah. And for someone listening who wanted to start their own business, what piece of advice could you give them? Marta Spirk: I will give them the same advice my dad gave to me on my wedding day as he handed me off. He said, Patience, which is the opposite of what I've always wanted or gravitated towards in my life, and that's why he said it to me. and I'll continue you know, whenever people say, What's the advice you would have given yourself when you started your business or when you were 18? And essentially that's it. We're in a society where things appear to move really fast, but nothing SabineKvenberg.com: Mm-hmm. Marta Spirk: can take away. That things take time, that things take failing and trying and not giving up and going for it again and again and again. And sometimes we SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: want to bypass that, right? And I think because of technology, we forget that there's a time for sowing, there's a time for watering, and there's a time for for the harvest. You can't expedite that process. It just it works like that. That's the way nature and the world. Operate and in many ways, yes, there are things you can do to expedite growth, right? You can invest in people SabineKvenberg.com: Mm-hmm. Marta Spirk: that will help you in systems. but at the same time, nothing beats life experience and wisdom. So in many ways, I've resented the time it's taken me to build what I have. But when I look back, especially when I talk to people that are starting out, I'm like, my gosh, I've been around. SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Yeah. Marta Spirk: I've been around. This is not my first rodeo. So I've heard these things and I know what works and I know what doesn't. It doesn't mean I'm closed off to trying new things, right? But nothing beats experience and you only get experience by doing the thing. So you just have to start and then you can't SabineKvenberg.com: Yeah. Marta Spirk: stop. SabineKvenberg.com: That's right. And you know what they say? sometimes people see s successful persons. my God, look at that. It it seems like an overnight success, but that Marta Spirk: Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: overnight success took 10 years, right? And a Marta Spirk: Exactly. Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: lot of failures and a lot of getting back up again and getting starting new and trying something different. And and th those experiences help. And as you said too, Having someone who can help you along the way doing this faster makes a big difference. So if someone Marta Spirk: Yes, it sure does. SabineKvenberg.com: wants to get a hold of you, what is the best way? Marta Spirk: Yeah, the best way is to find me on social media. I am on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Marta Spurk, but also my website, Marta Spurk.com. That's where you can learn more about my work. And also schedule a call for us to talk more if you're up for a one on one conversation and sharing your, you know, visibility journey and speaking journey so far and where you want to take it. I am happy to do that too. SabineKvenberg.com: Wonderful, wonderful. Well, Marta, thank you so much for sharing your journey and giving your pieces of advice and also let our audience understand, yeah, nothing comes fast. Have patience, but follow Marta Spirk: Hmm. Yes. SabineKvenberg.com: your dreams and then everything will fall in place. So thank Marta Spirk: Lead. Absolutely. SabineKvenberg.com: thank you, thank you so much for being here. Marta Spirk: Thank you so much. This is great.