Latest / Great Detectives of Old Time Radio Volume 2|Mystery Audio Dramas / The Saint: The Horrible Hamburger (EP1485)

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The Saint: The Horrible Hamburger (EP1485) · Great Detectives of Old Time Radio Volume 2|Mystery Audio Dramas

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Welcome to the Great Detectives of Old Time Radio from Boise, Idaho. This
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is your host, Adam Graham. If you have a comment, send it
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to me Box thirteen at Great Detectives dot net, follow us on Twitter at
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Radio Detectives, and become one of our friends on Facebook, Facebook dot com
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slash Radio Detectives. Before we get started, I do want to let you
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and I particularly want to thank Shane and David so much for their support.
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Will send along access to the freemium sign as we do with alternations of seven
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one five nine one three boys, the idahol eight three seven one five,
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and you can also support us at support dot Great Detectives dot man. Well,
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now it is time for today's episode of The Saint. The original aired
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eight September the tenth of nineteen fifty and the title is The Horrible Hamburg The
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Adventures of the Saint, starring Vincent Price. The Saint, based on character
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is created by Leslie Charteris and No One to millions from books, magazines and
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motion pictures. The Robinhood of modern crime now comes transcribed a radio storry Hollywood's
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brilliant and tell her to the actor Vincent Price as let's sing taxi taxi among
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men who know locomotion test it's Louis three to one. Hello Louis, and
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mister Temple Climate, Thank you Andy? Can I watch you this beautifully?
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Whither? Can you after me? Louis? What's wrong? Something has to
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be wrong before I use a poetical type speed. No, but as a
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law which says cab drivers can't use good England? Well, no, but
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no, witty? Can I watch you waft me to spring Lake Road?
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If you please? Spring Lake Road? I never height of it. You've
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nothing better to do than mcgre I'm making up new streets, Louis. Spring
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Lake Road is in west chest Good let it stay there, Ouie. I
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want to go there. Why I've been invited to dinner by some friends.
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The food tastes better in west Chest No, but my friends lived there,
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Okay, so please don't tell Louie. Lots of people live in Westchester.
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Lots of people are crazy. Westchester happens to be a very lovely place full
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of trees. Ain't it. The trees are attractive. Who apes, I'd
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better tell you how to go to tell me. I'll find it, I
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know, but listen, mister Temper. I'm a cab driver. Cab drivers
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never get lost, Louis, don't say it. We've just passed that oak
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tree on the left for the third time, so it's an active tree.
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I thought cab drivers never got lost. Somebody swiped all the streets side from
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the trees, So I got lost. So I'll turn my badge in.
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My wife will despise me, so my children will go through life a shames
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of their old man. So louay, Louis, it's ten o'clock. My
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dinner invitation was for eight thirty. You'll never make it. I don't doubt
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that, but I'm hungry. Next time you get to an eating place,
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don't say anymore. Right up the road, Yeah, the happy Hamburger Ben
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Lawton proprietor. I doesn't look very happy. What does it got to look
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happy? Above I'm at the place itself, So maybe it looks a little
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like if the wolf came around and huffed and puffed, he wouldn't have to
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strain along before it fell down. But food is food. Except when it's
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a happy Hamburger. Perhaps. However, hey, this must be the wolf
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puffing or maybe puffing here he is, yeah, savage looking at him some
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The poor dog looks as if he hadn't eaten for a week. Let's get
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into the joint before he mistakes me for a teeboll steak. Oh, fields
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happy hamburger is not having a busy night. What can I do for you?
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We'd like some dinner. Well, we're kind of closing, but you
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haven't closed yet. Oh, I guess we ain't said anywhere. I guess
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the missus dish up some food. I'll go tell her a very enthusiastic type
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host. Never mind that I hope they have a well stocked ladder. I
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hope it further occurs to me that they don't have to go out and catch
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that dog before they have a lighter at all. Stop hoping a man could
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get seasoned. Of course, this place may be an undiscovered gourmet's delight,
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but I wouldn't bet on it. A gourmet who could have delighted in this
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place is still undiscovered. What do you think of Missus Lawton's cooking? You
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know, I don't want to think of it. I'm trying to eat it.
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If we're your Jenni Fellas is more likely to finish. How about the
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dirt. Well, we've got blueberry pie, we got huckleberry pie. And
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what's the difference. Huckleberry pie is a nickel moore? Why harder to spell?
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Which you have apple pie? Oh? Man, what's the matter lily
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dinner? Yeah? I know exactly what you mean. However, we won't
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starve to death while you try to find your way back. I beg your
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pardon. It wasn't made up as a pie. I was afraid it was.
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I think maybe yeah, flat flat fine. We're back in front of
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that oak tree again. You keep your eye on that open mister Temple when
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I get the spare yeah, wants some help, No thanks, mister Temple.
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Yes, Louis, come here. Don't tell me you can't lift despair
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all by yourself. Despair I could lift. But there's something else you see?
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Yes, a hitchhiker man in his forties, praps dressed in farmer's clothing.
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He must have walking terribly tired, Louis, he got dead. Somebody
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shoots the guy, all right, Maybe you don't like him? Why does
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he have to stuff the corpse into the trunk of my cat. I don't
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know. There were no papers of any kind on the body, all right,
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so he's a total stranger. But why are we heading back to a
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Happy Handburger? Because that's where we must have acquired the corpse. It's the
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only place we stopped. We're out the side of the car unless he was
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already in the trunk before we left the city. No, No, I
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checked the tires plus the spare before I picked you up. Then it's the
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Happy Hamburger. The man was murdered fairly recently, anyway, How do you
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know? No rigor mortis body warning the mind of ver mind? You know
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I'll stay, you dope. And it's the temple. What kind of a
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welcome you think we're gonna get at the Hamburger? It's hard to tell,
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except that it may not be a welcome at all. Joint is doc.
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Looks like maybe they went out of business. There's a house behind the restaurant.
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That's duck too. The Lawtons may have gone to bed. It's after
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eleven. It is very late. Maybe we should go to bed. Becomes
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a Julia werewolf again. Yeah, that animals should be fad but not by
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me. All the flesh I got I need from along living I'm coming those
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the hound of the basket, and he's not bothering so far. He gets
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the feet to themselves. Suppose he decides the risk, if you will see
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how we take it, and it's a chance we'll have to take. Yep,
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here goes Oh, look now that our tumber has left us again,
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if I couldn't be more pleased. You know, if they're asleep, then
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I'm gonna love us with a great love, and I'm not at the moment
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seeking affection. Yeah, missus Lawton, that's right. My name is Simon
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Templar. This is Louis. What do you want? You cooked dinner for
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us a little while ago, so I cooked dinner for you. But since
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that time we've had a little trouble. We had a flat tire. This
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ain't a garage. I wasn't referring to the tire when I said trouble.
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Why don't you say what you're referring to? Well, I would rather your
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husband were here when I do. He's asleep or he can be waved.
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What far it's a matter of some importance. You still ain't said anything the
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matter might be murder. Murder, that's right, come in, I think
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right in here it's the parlor, Michell. It takes time to waken mister
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Lawton and sleeps hard. Well, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid it's necessary.
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That don't make it easier, But I'll get him up from the drift.
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I think the weight for her is gracious. Very few women are at
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their best in the middle of the night. Louis, that's what you'd think,
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would you like? Now? Okay, hey, mister Temple, you
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figuring the deceased we got in the cab was put there but a lot.
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It's not necessarily they did have the opportunity, But so what anyone else who
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might have been around the place where we were having dinner or stop complicating,
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thinks it's bad enough. This is some Paula. I've seen cheerier places.
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They've got a radio, no television set? Is that, mister Temple?
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What do you think of television? I think of it as infrequently as I
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can. Missus Lawton is apparently having difficulty awaken her husband. From what we've
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seen a guy, how can she tell when he's awaken? And eleven twelve?
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You know what happens at midnight. Ghosts take walks. Maybe our bites
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have flown the coop. It's a possibility. How can a boid fly a
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coop in here? They can't fly a coop? Hi, hello, mister
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Lawton. You didn't have to bother dressing for us. I dress for myself.
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Don't go tracking mud over the best rug stack? Where you are?
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I'll say where I am? Wife tells me you are mister templar. I
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am. She also tells me you got something to say about a murder.
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I have say it in a moment. Your wife and you own the Happy
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Hamburger. You already know that I noticed quite some farm land behind the house
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yours? Yeah, frem yourself? Pretty much? Does that? Pretty much
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mean you have help sometimes hired hands named Webster? Why only sometimes? Well,
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you up and quit this afternoon. It's too bad. Oh, he'll
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be back as soon as he spends his money. You might be wrong about
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that, always has before. What are you getting at? Suppose we go
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outside to the cab. Huh, I don't mind, Come on, emmy,
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I'm right here. What kind of a man as Webster not much account
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works when he has to eat, gets a full belly stops working. The
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philosopher perhaps ever have any quarrels with him? Kind of know? Is the
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ancient mister templar? Perhaps? But is there any reason why your husband should
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hesitate about answering that question? No reason, no quarrels, Fine, Louis,
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Yeah, please open the Trump compartment, will you sure? In a
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second. There's something I'd like to show you, mister Lawton. If you
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were planning on surprising anybody, give up? What do you mean? Look,
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m looks like Boyd's cancel, like Coops something I picked the wrong Boyd.
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We have mislaid our corpse, mister appear strange. See how about letting
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us in on this? Mister Lawton, was your hired hand, a man
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in the middle forties with brown hair and eyes of stocky build a small scar
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under his left job one, that's Webster. You must have at him.
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What do you have to say for himself? We met him, but he
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didn't have anything to say. We didn't start out being the great loves of
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the Lawson's life. But I hate to think what they must be thinking of
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us now right, I hate to think of the missing mister Webster. Yeah,
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he didn't even say goodbye, mister Temple. What happened to him?
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I don't know. Corpses rarely are the active tide, but the late mister
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Webster may have been an exception. Exceptions like that, I hope stay away
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from me. We're in what could easily be an overgrown filling station. Slow
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down, lowie, this is expert. Oh. The town nearest the happy
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Hamburger place seems to be shut up for the night. I didn't think the
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sidewalks in though. Hey, up ahead the gay White way. A drug
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store badly is still open. Let's stop there, Leving Okay, yeah,
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when those full of harnesses vitalizer and yacht goods. How do you know what's
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a drug store? And there's a large sign advertising ice cream sodas in front.
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Oh well that explains it. Well, thanks only for information. Come
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along, he joined us crawling with juveniles, and look at the joke box.
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And so it is the waitress behind the fountain that's too public. The
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waitress the fountain. Uh, mister templar, I just noticed behind the cast
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rogister dissent. Look, yeah, we'll not put your eyes back in her
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sockets. She's dressed in gingham she's wearing pigtails and big blue eyes. She's
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nearly the farmer's daughter doing? Is that a fact? Hey? Maybe she
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knows a joke. He's still she may be able to help us? Is
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help the word you really had in mind? Good evening? Then hired it?
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I beg your pardon? So far? What's for? Mm? And
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fire means what it used to be? Not to mention the farmer's daughter.
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Who's a little stranger? Who's the Oh that's Louis. It's not bad either,
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but it looks married. Who are you? I'm in templar, I'm
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Teddy, And what are you doing after I get through here? Well?
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Are you married? No? What a coincidence. I'm not married either.
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What it happens all the time. But what I wanted my closest in half
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hour? Tell me that, my dear Teddy. I look, what do
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you know about a man named Webster? Dan Webster, I imagine, so
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hired hand out to the Lawtons. Yeah, that's the Dan Webster I had
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in mind. He wears a private property no trespassing sign on him. Oh
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who's signed missus Lawton's. How does mister Lawton feel about that? Mister Lawton
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has never seen fit to whisper, sweet, nothing's in my show like ears?
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Don't you think these show like my ears? I mean I hadn't noticed
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stop wasting time and do so noticing. Look, I'm almost old enough to
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be your father maybe, but you're not my father. Uh. Good evening
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so far, it's a terrible evening. Where are you going? Dewey?
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And I have an errand to do? My phone number is one three seven
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in case in case of what your erin is out of town. Goodbye,
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Wow. I'm afraid Wow is exactly right. Oh, you know, I'm
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coming to the conclusion. They got something these small panes up in Westion.
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What you mean they have is teddy and you're married and we have an appointment?
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Yeah, Well, the Happy Hamburger. You mean we're gonna wake the
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Lawtons again? I hope not. So what are we going out there for?
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We're going to dress us on very private property. I ought to hang
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a sign would shuttle on it. I'm like, I don't imagine we're going
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to be coming out here again. You're not breaking my heart. You know,
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every time we come out to the Happy Hamburger gets darker. I think
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I'll coin a proverb too late. It's always darker before it's lighter. I
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don't think that'll catch on happy Hamburgers. Up ahead, Louis. We have
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a problem. Oh, thanks for letting me. What kind of a problem
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have we got? We gotta find a pond, a brook, or perhaps
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a lake. You've got a sudden desire to go swimming, No, not
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swimming. You forget something, Louis, I always forget something. What is
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it this time? Ponds, brooks or lakes create mud? Oh? Thanks
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a lot tonight. I don't need any more. Call me hypersensitive. I
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just don't need any more. You better stop the car under these trees.
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Okay, you know about that much. I have respect. You're mistaken.
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That's because you've got a suspicious nature. You've got to get starting. They
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were heading away from the house. True. Why we're looking first? I
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know, I know, And they rarely occur in house. Okay, okay?
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Does this watery object you're looking for have to be any place in particular?
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Or are we surveying Westchester count It has to be on the Lawton's land
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All that helps? Yeah? Probably they got one hundred and thirty nine acres
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and in the dark. How are we gonna search it? I understand,
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hazel twigs don't wake anymore. That hound without a home again. I hope
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he goes away, and silly way we want to meet up with him.
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You'll do all the wanting by yourself. Why, because he's going to be
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a hazel twig? What is hey, went mate? You mean he'll help
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us find water? Actually, but what is all this excitement about water anyway?
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Among other things? The way water wish is away blood. No,
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I'll tell you a secret, mister Templar. I never liked hikes. It
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can't be much longer. That dog is definitely leading us somewhere. Sure,
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she'll probably to a poney buried the last month. I don't get it.
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Are you referring to the junior sized lakes that pond? Yes? No?
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What? Oh fine, fine, he went swimming. We gotta go swimming
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too. No, we can walk around the pond. We're at one end
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of it. Hey, look at that on ground hunker hamburgers stopped. Yeah,
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just beyond the pond, in a small plump of trees would join them.
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Of course, come on, why because the land around the pond is
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muddy, all right, So the land around upon is muddy. This fills
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me with a great dog's not moving, he's waiting for him. Also fills
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my shoes with mud. Hey, you know what after the trees, when
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they die, they become telegraphed. Oh, stop swiping my jokes. That
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dog is going out with joy. What does he got to be showing?
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Everybody hasn't even gone near a tree. He's digging at the ground. Oh
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sure you had that bonny buried last month. Do you know what we're going
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to do, Louis, I got an unhappy idea. We're gonna copy the
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dog and dig right, I'm already looking for something to dig with. What
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are we going to dig for? Something the dog lost? No, it
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was something we love. Hey, mister templess, couple of feet more.
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I'll be in China. Don't be silly. You can't get to China by
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digging straight down, but you can't where you get is. Australia tells me
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things like that, Hey, what is it, Louis. From where you
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are you can't see, but from down here, well, I'll come to
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the edge of the hall. Well, Louis, we've kind of found that
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courts all over again. I can tell that ball to shut up. I
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don't feel so now. I'll give you a hand, Louis, help climb
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out of the hole that sounds like a cap backfire. Roads too far away,
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never mind climbing up her, Louis, I'm going to join you down
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there. Hey, what's going on? And I'm not gonna like the answer?
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And someone is having target practice with us for target wool. I could
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see a vague figure at the other side of the pond, too dark to
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identify. Oh, there goes that hound that walks like a horse. Probably
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figured was too crowded down here. Hey, mister templar, I hate to
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mention miss, but if the boy with the gun kind of world is over
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here, I realized that Louis this grave, we're in this level. The
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edge on your side is lower than the one facing the pond, which means
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you can climb out without being seen. Make for the trees, then for
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the roads, your cab, And if you policemen may be sober, then
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what are you going to stay here? Otherwise our gun shooting friend will head
23:08
for the cab too. But while I'm getting help, you are level to
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be getting killner. It's a chance we'll have to take, and believe me,
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I'm not taking it with any great joy, but we have no alternative.
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You better hurry, okay, mister Templar, But look at with the
23:22
way the taxi businesses, be careful. I don't want to have to look
23:25
for another fair and a counter. You got shot in the woods. I
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mean, well, it's been a lovely life. Simon, What on earth
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are you doing down there? What on earth? Not, Teddy? Is
23:52
it fun down there? Because if it's fun, if I'm right down,
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Teddy, stay where you're are. Hum may not be very fancy down here,
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but it is cozy. Simon. He didn't tell me you weren't alone.
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I didn't have a chance to better not to look at him too long,
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Simon, what on earth are you doing down at the bottom of a
24:11
grave with mister Lawton? He is mister Lawton, isn't he? Well,
24:17
of course he is. Why do you say it in that funny way?
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Because we were supposed to think it was Dan Webster, except that I hadn't
24:23
thought so none for a while and he was murdered. Teddy, did you
24:29
murder it? No? Well, I'm certainly glad to hear that, because
24:32
you're very handsome. But after all, even Hansoon fellas shouldn't murder people?
24:36
What they should do with Teddy? Dan Webster, along with Missus Lawton,
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murdered mister Lawton. Well that's not very surprising, because I did have a
24:42
crush on each other, and nobody loved mister Lawton anyway. They must have
24:45
planned to leave town immediately after the murder. But uh, Teddy, did
24:49
you happen to notice a dog about? Not to mention Dan Webster, I
24:53
heard somebody running in a dog barking before I found you. Mmm dog,
24:57
mister frightened Webster, are so that's all right? How did you find me?
25:02
I noticed your car outside the Happy Hamburger. I lived on the road
25:04
a bit and was going home, so I knew you were someplace around.
25:08
And when I was a little girl, I used to be a girl Scott
25:11
because you wanted to learn how to tie out to Bill campfire, No,
25:15
because I wanted to learn how to track a man. I had a feeling
25:19
it would come in hand it had. Did anybody call for a cab?
25:27
Louis excuse me, daddy, Hello Louis, Hello, Louis says I thought
25:33
you'd gone to town for help. It would take too long. Maybe I
25:37
could get behind the villain and surprise him. So instead, mister Templey,
25:41
you surprised me. Back to the Hamburger again. Well hungry, no,
26:00
except perhaps for justice, Simon. The Lawton's car is out front, and
26:03
this is Lawton's in it. Come on into the cab over this way.
26:07
It might be as quiet as you can't all right, anyway, you can't
26:15
see us under the trees. Here, turn your ignition on. Louis,
26:18
be ready to start the car. Okay, it's ready. It's just coming
26:25
out of the house carrying a couple of suitcases getting into the car. Here
26:36
they go, Louis, I know followed them. You may not notice they
26:41
being follow and supposing they do, I will have to chance that. Okay,
26:45
but look, I don't mind so much being shot myself. But don't
26:48
forget this. Here cat belongs to the company. I can't afford to get
26:52
bullets in it. We're coming into Exebrook what now, mister templand Teddy at
27:08
this hour of the night, no one would be about him. I right,
27:11
that is kind of light. The police station is where the next block
27:15
in that case. Catch up with him, Louie quick, well, I
27:18
should have a collision with him. Preferably a small sized when you're a good
27:21
driver. Louis run them off the road with the camera. Mind that hit
27:25
them as soon as we get opposite the station. Okay, I only hope
27:30
it will show on the meter. We're getting close to him, and NaN's
27:52
going Louis, Oh, didn't leave a scratch offender, say one of those
27:57
tops polite, which is very young usual And Louis be still, why I
28:03
have to explain things to Teddy here from what I heard sheet on Louie,
28:07
I shut up, please Simon tell me, well, you see, Teddy,
28:10
missus Lawton and Webster planned to kill mister Lawton and then leave town,
28:12
figuring no one would ever know. How did they expect to get away with
28:15
it? Actually, their idea of placing the corpse in the trunk compartment of
28:18
the cab was clever. Normally the body wouldn't have been discovered for days and
28:22
then miles away from exper But instead you got a flat and came back very
28:27
lucky flat. But not for missus Lawton and Webster. She got quite a
28:30
shock when she saw her smiling faces, but she kept her head and sent
28:34
Webster out to remove the body from Louie's cab and hide it. The only
28:38
mistake she made was being too housewifely. What do you mean? Oh?
28:42
When Webster returned, her instinctive reaction was to tell him not to track mud
28:47
on the rug. If he'd been asleep in the house, there shouldn't have
28:49
been mud on his shoes. Therefore, I concluded he'd been out I see,
28:53
and when the body was missing, I knew that he buried it.
28:57
The mud also told me the burial place had to be near water, And
29:00
mister Lawton's dog led you to the burial place, and that's where I found
29:04
you. Simon. Yes, but we were kind of interrupted back there,
29:11
so wow, wow, wow, Louis, I'm not hearing a thing.
29:17
Was she anything? In my review mirror? Louis, we've reached Teddy's Bay,
29:21
stopped the car. Okay, but sign my dear, you're very lovely,
29:26
but you're very young, so I'm afraid this is where the farmer's daughter
29:32
goes back to the farm. You're been listening to one other transcribed adventure of
29:48
a saint, the robin Hood of Modern Crime. Now here's our star of
29:51
Incent Price. Ladies and gentlemen. Our cast tonight included Louise ericson Noreene Gamiel,
29:56
Arthur Q. Bryan and Dave Light. Larry Dopkin was Lewis. This
30:00
is Vincent Price inviting you to join us again next week at this same time
30:04
for another exciting adventure of the Saint. Good Night. Tonight's script of The
30:30
Saint was written by Lewis Vittie's. The music was composed and conducted by Von
30:34
Dexter. The Saints, based on characters created by Leslie Charteris, is a
30:38
James L. Safier production and is directed by Helen Mack. Vincent Price is
30:42
soon to be seen co starring in RKO's production of His Kind of Woman.
30:48
All you Saints fans will be glad to know that the Saint comic books are
30:51
on sale at All News Fans. Your an answer is Don Stanley. Three
30:55
times Mean Good Times on NBC. Wednesday marks the return to the air of
30:57
that delightful couple. Miss Here and This is Ronald Coleman has more good times
31:02
in the Halls of Ivy with this and This is Ronald Coleman returns to NBC
31:04
next Wednesday. Make a date. Here are the Halls of Ivy next Wednesday
31:08
evening. The times are your invitation. Next it's Sam Spay, then an
31:11
hour long drama on Theater Guild on MBB. Welcome back, Well. I
31:26
continue to appreciate just the sheer number of rules that Arthur Q. Brian is
31:32
getting here, particularly noteworthy for those of us who primarily remember him as Elmer
31:37
five. And I did find that whole part about caves not getting lost and
31:42
really knowing wait their way around interesting because that's been something I've traditionally held to,
31:49
though in the last couple of times i've taken calves, I don't do
31:53
it too often. I've been very surprised to find there in the twenty first
31:57
century we have cavies who don't actually they know their way around the area and
32:01
are actually totally dependent on the GPS, though I don't know in this case
32:07
that's probably a little bit of twenty first century knowledge that would have benefited lowly,
32:12
but at any rate, that'll actually do it for today. We'll be
32:15
back tomorrow with Crime and Peter Chambers, and join us back here next Monday
32:21
or another episode of The Saint. In the meantime, sendra comments to Box
32:24
thirteen at Great Detectives dot Net. Follow us on Twitter at Radio attactives and
32:30
become one of our friends on Facebook, Facebook, dot com. Slash Radio
32:34
detectives from Boise, Idaho. This is your host, Adam Grahamson and all