Latest / The Breakfast Club / Legacy, Love and All of The Above ( Iman Shumpert on Club Shay Shay and The Mann's Inspiring Relationship)

Transcript

Legacy, Love and All of The Above ( Iman Shumpert on Club Shay Shay and The Mann's Inspiring Relationship) · The Breakfast Club

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Tis.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: I'm a homegrowd that knows a little bit about everything
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: and everybody who I don't know.
• 0:06
  Speaker 3: If you don't lie about that, right, Lauren came in. Hey, y'all,
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: what's up.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: It's Lauren Rosa and this is another episode of the
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Latest with Lauren de Rosa. This is your DELI dig
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: on all things pop culture, entertainment, news, and all of
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: the conversations that shake the room. Baby, So checking in
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: behind the scenes of the grind, y'all, I am on
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: a count down. My grandmother turns eighty eight, literally in
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: less than twenty four hours, so I'm preparing for that,
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: getting everything ready to you know, just go hang out,
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: have a good time with my grandmother and family and
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: whoever pops out for her this weekend. I'll also briefly
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: be in Baltimore this weekend for the CIAA weekend. I'm
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: hosting a cheerleading competition and then bringing them my behind
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: right on back the Grams and into the family. But yeah,
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I'm excited.
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: I was.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: I was talking to my grandmother that morning. First of all,
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: I thought my grandma was turning. And I don't call
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: her grandma, I called her my mom. I thought my
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: mama was turning like eighty five, eighty six, And today
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: I was talking to her and she was I was like,
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: my mom, how old are you turning? And she was
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: like eighty eight And I was like, yo, like that's crazy.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: My grandma was almost ninety years old. But you would
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: never know.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: Baby. Let me tell you all something.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Okay. You know how they say black don't crack. Black grandmothers,
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: they're timeless, like they just are. My grandmother gives sixty
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: five years old. I promise you, she's gonna tear somebody
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: up in space this weekend. It's gonna be a great time.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: We're gonna have good food. I gotta She don't even
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: know how I'm about to do it up for her.
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: And I couldn't tell her because she'd be like, say
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: your money, save your money, and I am saving my money.
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: I am.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: And we were talking about that too. I'm doing such
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: a good job of saving my money and just kind
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: of preparing myself. We were having that whole like I
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: won't be here forever conversation, and you know, we were
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: talking about a lot of things. But I was telling
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: my boy friend when I sent him just you know,
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: some of the things we were gonna be doing this weekend.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: He was like, he was like, okay, big Mama, because y'all,
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: I'm so excited. I'm excited for her to see the
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: house that we're gonna do our staycationing. I got catering
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: coming through. I wanted to surprise her and do like
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: nails and all that in the house, like have somebody come.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: But I caught her to day and she was on
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: her way to the Nelson line.
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: She did.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: I try to get her to stay and sit still.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: I'm like, it's going snow, just stay in the house,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: and she's like no. But I was telling him, like,
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: you know, literally, without my grandmother, I wouldn't be here,
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: like you guys would not be hearing from me. I
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: mean literally, right, I wouldn't be here because my grandma
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: had to have my mom in order for my mom
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: to have me. But I mean, like just career wise,
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: me and my grandmam are really really close. My dad
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: was you know my dad, he's not I was gonna say,
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: he's not in my I don't know how you described
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: me and my dad's relationship, Like I know my dad
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: of course, and me and my dad yet like it's
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: it's all love, but my dad wasn't in the household.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: My dad wasn't you know, super consistent all the time.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: So so my second parent was my grandmother, like my mo.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: Mom has been like my saving grace so many times
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: all of my life. And when I decided to leave
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: TMZ and I decided to leave LA, I didn't have
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: any money, but I didn't have really a choice. My
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: grandmother actually had had a slight heart attack, and when
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: that happened, it was already pressure on me because I
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: was just you know, after my mom had battled cancer
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: and she was good, I still didn't feel okay with
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: being so far because just everything I realized that had
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: changed because I'd been in LA for years and then
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: now I'm home in Delaware, you know, taking care of
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: my mom for this year, and that time my pop
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: pop passes away, and you know, my mom gets better,
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: and my Grandmam's chilling, she's cool this whole time that
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: I'm in Delaware. But I just begin to notice how
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: much I was missing, like the small things I was missing,
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: and just the things that they needed because they were
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: getting older. And I'm like, yo, I can't be here
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: twenty four seven, but at least I need to figure
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: out being closer.
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: And I'm not the best now.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: Like you know, I do as much as I can
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: when I can, but with work picking up, I don't.
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: Always have the time to always be there.
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, Like I'm doing a lot,
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: but it's better I'm closer. But I say all that
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: to say my grandmother when all of that, when I
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: made those decisions to come this way, because of everything
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: I just described, I didn't have a job, like I
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: was still working at TMZ for some time. I had
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: taken leave, tried to go back to LA, tried to
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: move my mom to LA with me. Just was too much.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: When I decided like, yo, okay, this doesn't work anymore
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: for my life, for my mental for nothing. Literally, I
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: was in Delaware. We had an event space that we
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: had opened. Shout out to anybody that was, you know,
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: supporting me during the event space era. The event space
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: was called the Spot thrill Tube was in Delaware, and
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: I was just doing as much as I could with
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: that and just you know, I had picked up a
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: few projects. I was working with Escape ESPN. I wrote
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: for them a bit, I hosted a little bit. I
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: was just doing anything I could to like have money
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: coming because I wasn't getting money from a leave or
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: anything like that. And I quit my job, so I
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: wasn't getting any unemployment like y'all. I was figuring it out.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: And my grandmother and my mom, they've always like done
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: property related things like ownership right. And my grandmother, I
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: remember her one day we had a conversation and she
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: was just like, look, I think you're at a position
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: where you need to lean on yourself and employ yourself.
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: She gave me a few instructions. She told me what
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: to do.
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: She told me how to basically, like you know, take
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: some things that she had put aside to me, put
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: aside for me, use it, reinvest in myself and basically
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: just set myself up financially where I could at least
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: have money coming in or money available when I needed
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: it and be able to pay my rent. I was
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: still living like very like hand in hand, like you know,
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: like it was.
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: It was.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: It was a very different time, especially because I've always
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: been working and always been doing things.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: But I was just figuring it out.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: And in the midst of that, I was guest hosting
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: at the Breakfast Club, and then I moved to New York,
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: and even then she held it down. You know, if
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: I need a little rerint money before you know, a
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: job picked in or whatever. She she has always held
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: me down. So now and we've always talked about me
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: getting in a position where I was able to save money,
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: I was able to consistently do for myself. She used
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: to just my grandma always says to me, I know
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: you're gonna be fine, honey.
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: I know you're a star. I know you're gonna be good.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: I know you're gonna figure it out before that's before
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: she lectures me about not saving money or or something
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: like that. Right, And we've always literally talked about what
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: life would look like when I got to that point
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: where like I'm able to provide for myself consistently, because
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: even in La it was such a fight because I
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: was so far and things are so expensive and it
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: just money was just different over there. So now that
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: she sees that I'm in a space were like, I'm
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: doing so much, but it's benefiting me and I'm getting
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: further in my career. She told me today, like I'm
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: just so proud of you, Like I'm so proud of you.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: You're doing everything that you talked about you were going
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: to do. You're you know, you're getting better at understanding that,
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: like you got to prepare for rainy days.
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: I'm proud of you.
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: So I told you, know Bee, I'm like, look, I
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: would I literally would not be here. You wouldn't even
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: hear of me or know of me. And that goes
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: for you guys too, as the low rider, as if
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: it wasn't for my grandmam and her prayers. But listen
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: in her holding me down and let me borrow that
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: money and do all the things that I've needed to
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: do so she gonna get the fruit to my labor period,
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: like hands down, Like she has been the biggest hurt
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: in my mom. But you know my grandmother has like
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: even when my mom didn't understand it at one point,
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: my grandma didn't understand it either, But she never asked
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: me any questions. She just always supported me always, and
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: I mean big girl support sometimes like coming through with
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: the with the checkbook and not even as financially just
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: like you know, we're also really close, so like I
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: can call her, we talk about everything.
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: She's just taught me so much.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: So I want this, I mean I always want my
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: mom and my grandmother's lives to feel like they've worked
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: so much and now they can just kind of enjoy,
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: you know, what they've built, and that me and my
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: brother we got it. But with this birthday, I mean
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: every birthday special, but this this year, this birthday, eighty
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: eight is a big number. She on our way to ninety,
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: y'all's official. She on our way to ninety, then on
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: our way to one hundred. And her biggest thing is
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: like she just wants to spend time. Like she's always
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: telling me, like, you need to make sure you schedule
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: more time to spend time with us. So that's what
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: we're doing this week, and we spending time. It's going
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: to be amazing. I can't wait until she walks in
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: and she sees the house, because that's another thing too,
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Like we were talking about me buying a house, and
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: she can't wait for me to buy a house that
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: I actually live in. And at one point she wanted
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: it to be in Delaware so bad. But I think
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: she's realized now that for work it really can't be.
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: But this week is going to feel like that. It's
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: going to feel like we're all living in a house together,
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: having a good time doing all the things.
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: So I'm excited. So you guys will hear more about that.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Monday, because yeah, we're getting into it. I always say,
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: we don't have a lot to talk about behind the
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: scenes of the grind and then to be a whole thing.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: Right now, let's get on into the latest because there
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: is a lot to talk about. So Amon Shemperd, who
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: you know, NBA player at one point, big NBA player
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: at one point actor. Now you can watch him on
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: the Shy also was married to and share children with
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: Tianna Taylor. Sat down for an interview with Shannon Sharp
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: on Club Shash and this. Watching this interview, wow, it was.
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: It was such an emotional interview. But watching this interview,
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: I think for me because you know, I don't I'm
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: not like a sports fan. Of course, I know Iman
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: Shumperd because of Tianna Taylor and having reported on him,
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: you know previously, even before that situation, but within the
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: that situation as well too. I met him at the
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: Black Effect podcast. So I don't know if you really
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: care for me too much now because of some of
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: the reporting I did on him and Tianna Taylor's divorce
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: when it was happening. But nonetheless, I have no issue
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: with anybody. I'm literally always just doing my job whether
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: people understand it or not. This interview really made me
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: like I was kind of in awe of his ability
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: to like be as vulnerable in this space because I
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: feel like I've seen interviews with him before and even
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: when I watched I used to watch Taana Taylor and
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: Dea Mon Shampir's reality show they had about their marriage
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: and everything that they had happening, and you know, I
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: feel like you knew him a bit, but you didn't
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: really like know him for real. But when he sat
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: down with this interview with Shannon Sharp, I was like, wow,
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: like he is being very vulnerable. So straight out the gate,
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: you know, Shannon Sharp asked him how he's doing, and
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: then he mentions the fact that Iman Shepherd's father passed
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: away not too long ago, and it gets very emotional.
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: Do you remember the last conversation you had with your father?
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: My bad? My bad dog? He really I want bad,
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: So he really wanted me to uh. He liked when
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: I uh, but I would wear the suits full soup.
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: He liked when I wear a shirt and tie stuff.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: He always got dressed for the office every day, wear
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: a shirt, shirt and tie and uh our last cowbo.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: He just was like, man, you look good at them
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: uh and them suits, man, like I like that you're
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: taking jobs now that you you're wearing that suit. And
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: then he told me, don't come home finished filming because
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: we was filming the podcast. I have to come home
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: finish filming. He gotta go in the hospital. He be
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: right back. Yeah, that was the last one.
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: But did you know your father was that sick?
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: He never showed, he never shared that. I mean, I mean,
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: I knew he had to go in the hospital. I
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: thought he just had some like you know, people get older.
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, being there a couple of days and he'd be
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: right back.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And then knowing him, I just you know, I
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: would have been I guess I naturally worry more about
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: my mom because yeah, I ain't never the dude don't
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: ask for help. He don't. Yeah, even in the last
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: couple of months. Man, it was like hard to help him,
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean, we ain't know what was
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: going on for real, but it's like the help we
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: thinking we're doing. We just like, yeah, Dad, like you
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: could ask us for anything, Like you know what I mean, like,
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: but I ain't even like notice that that he's going
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: out his way to say thank you, because it's.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: Like, now, that's one of the things that.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about my grandmother, and I'm talking about eighty
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: eight and like, you know, all these years to come,
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: and I swear man, like, my biggest fear is being
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: without people that I love, that that have been a
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: part of my life for my whole life. My grandmother,
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: my mom, my brother, like everybody, like my family, like y'all.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: It's I know that living forever is not a real thing.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: And you know, as people get older. I don't know
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: about you guys, but the older people in my family,
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: they talk about not being here forever as if it's
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: something that they are just okay with at this point.
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: And I think it is.
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: One of them things where you get older and you
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: come to terms with, like, you know, life, you've lived
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: your life and all of that. But I just don't
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: know what I would do if I couldn't pick up
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: the phone and call my grandmother and you know, be
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: excited about her birthday and you know, all these things,
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: or my mother or whoever. But I know that it's
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: going to happen one day, you know, hopefully twenty plus
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: years from now. Hearing him in this space and talk
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: about all of that, it just made me think about
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: that fear in what that looks like, you know, life
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: posts people living their fullest life and getting up, getting up,
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: getting up on.
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: Out of here.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: What does life look like? And how am I preparing
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: today for that to happen? And I don't think you
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: really can ever prepare, if I'm being honest with you,
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: But I do think that there are things that you
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: can do to make it where it's like I'm I
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: have a peace of mind that I poured into that
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: person or in that relationship as much as I could.
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: And that's the sense that I got from Iman Shumper
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: when he was talking about his dad and his relationship
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: with his dad, because there was one point in an
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: interview where Shannon Sharp even asked him like, if your
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: dad was sitting here right now, what would you say?
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: And this is what he mon said.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Your dad was at me this chair today, it's been
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: going a year and you could have a conversation with it.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: What do you think he would say to you?
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: And what would you want to say to him? Yep,
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: I don't know if my dad held back anything for me,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: so I don't think he had much to say. He
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: probably just reflect on whatever I'm going through at the moment.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: And to me, I'm like, you know that read, I
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: would have nothing else to say. We talked every day,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: We've said everything that we've needed to say. At this point,
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: I would just be in all of his presence and
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: I would just want to feel that, And I'm like, man.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: That.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: Unk Shayshae in waste.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: No, they weren't even an hour into the interview and
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: it got this like deep and his vulnerable, like emon
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: had to take a second to get itself together to
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: even get through the interview.
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: And I mean this just recently happened.
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: His father passed away back in October of twenty twenty five,
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: so you know, this is very fresh. And again you
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: could tell us that was very impactful in his life,
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: so he's still dealing with that. But what I also
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: thought was interesting was to hear him talk about his
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: views on marriage now. And the reason why I segue
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: from the father conversation and family and you know what
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: that instills in you and them not being here one
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: day is because what I've been having conversations with myself
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: about is the biggest thing I can do to prepare
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: myself for after the people that I love are not
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: here anymore, is take everything I can from them wisdom wise,
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: even the things that they do that I don't want
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: to repeat in my life, right like, take all of
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: the good, the bad, the ugly, and just be in
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: a space where like I'm living a life that they
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: will still continue to be. Like I'm proud of you
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: know what I mean, and really being true to myself
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: and that and I mean, it seems like a mine
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: has gotten to the point, he says, you know, him
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: and Tianna Taylor, they're in a good space. Everything is
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: cool now that at some point And I told you,
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: I don't think. I don't know how her mom feels
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: about me. I don't know if he cares for me
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: too much. And the last time I talked to him,
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: he was cussing me out. But they've gotten because of
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: the different because the divorce, there was a lot happening.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: There was a lot of like tense moments that were
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: being talked about and replayed the media.
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: And I understand it.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: It's something sensitive to people, like I get it. But
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: he says, they're in a better space and that things
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: are good, which is really important when you're raising kids.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: But his take on marriage after the fact, like post marriage,
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: right post divorce, I thought was interesting because it seems
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: like he's really gotten to a point where he understands hisself,
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: at least for now, right because things change, people change.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: You meet somebody that can change your whole, you know.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: But it seems like he's in a space where he
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: really understands what he wants, what he doesn't want.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: And why.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: And that's important as you're you know, healing from things,
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: as you are figuring out who you are post various things, divorce,
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: losing people you love, you know, trying to instill what
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: they've taught you every day in your life.
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: Let's take a listen. What about this marriage.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: I don't know if I'll do it legally, Like I
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: don't want to sign papers and all that, Like we're
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: gonna do a contract. We're gonna do a contract owning
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: something that we both trying to do. Anyway, I'd rather
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: the contract be about a business. If my mama at
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: the wed and we got married, if my.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Mama was there, it happy, it happened, for sure.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: But this whole they get to be a part of
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: it now because we went to the house and now
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: we gotta do this now, I gotta I don't even
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: doing all that.
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: Look, I mean, I might not necessarily agree because for me,
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: I want the paperwork. I want to do the whole shebang,
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. But I think I've always
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: known because I'm very inquisitive, and I I've always said
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: I don't believe in divorce. I don't want to divorce,
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: you know. I want to figure it out. I want
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: to work it out. But prior to having to figure
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: it out and work it out, I want to make
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: a really good choice. And not that Amoun Intiana Tay
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: didn't make a good choice in choosing each other. They
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: have two beautiful babies that have come out of it.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: But what I'm saying is that I want to make
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: a choice of like, even if the person that I
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: choose to be with is not the best situation for
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: me because of something that is happening, we can get
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: to a point where we choose each other to figure
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: it out. And it doesn't happen for everybody, but that's
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: just what I want for myself. And I saw another
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: interview David Man, who they lowriders, y'all they listen to
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: the podcast. So David Man and Miss Timila Man were
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: on Jamal Bryant's podcast at Him and his wife do.
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: The podcast is called Let's be Clear Now. They're having
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: a conversation about all of the things and they get
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: into the marriage conversation. And one thing I love about
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: David Man and mister David Man and Miss Timila Man's
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: relationship or their marriage, let me get it right, their
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: marriage is that their union is so strong.
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: And I don't say that.
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: They said that they've never gone through things, know and
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: I don't know, you know them, things have ever got
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: them to the brink of being like, uh, nope, we
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: ain't doing this no more. But they figured it out.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: They've been together for thirty eight years and I learned
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: today that they've never had a separation.
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: Let's say a listen, how many years.
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: Years? Wow?
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, no separations, come on, she said.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: No separations.
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: Loving it. We work through it. It don't mean I
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: wasn't mad.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: At them, but we were listener now being in a marriage, like,
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: they got the union so strong and y'all both celebrities,
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: I know it come with it. Come with some task.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: Child.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: I know it do because let me tell y'all something
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: every single day, like now and then, I'm in a
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: relationship and I'm in a relationship with a man, Honey,
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: I mean, okay, I'm in a relationship with a person
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: that makes me want to do better, It makes me
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: want to figure it. I'm not perfect, and my mouth
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: is still crazy. I will pause that, but you know
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: I don't have to. It's still crazy, you know, so
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: every now and then, and it'd be like a hold
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: on all right, who you talk and vice versa, Like
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: you know, there are tough moments, and even though our
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: relationship is new, I feel like when I when I
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: hear the men have a conversation about what their marriage is,
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: that's what I envision my marriage to be. And now
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: dealing with a person who you know, I wouldn't be
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: opposed to marrying, I wouldn't be opposed to doing like
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: very permanent things with I always think about what is
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: it that I can do to just ensure that, you know,
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: like it's like you really just want to you want
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: to hear the person, even in moments where I'm like
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: I don't want to hear that, not like you know what,
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to put on my best, like like standing
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: ten toes down eleven if I have to. You do
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: want to hear the person out. You do want the
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: person to be happy because you want to be happy.
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: You want to be heard out. So I've had to
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: learn a lot about enforcing boundaries that I didn't even
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: know I had to learn. If I'm being honest with y'all,
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: I thought I was so good at like armslength, don't
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: play with me. I'm showing up I work, I go home,
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: respect me, and I'm not going to beg you for it.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: But like I thought, I was really good at that,
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: and I think I do do a really good job
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: because I respect myself, so people respect me. But when
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: you're dealing with now, I wouln't even say people in
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: the limelight because he's not in the limelight. He's behind
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: the scenes. And I still feel like there are certain
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: things that I have to chin check boundaries on and
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: it's just it's a very touchy space and I think
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: it's taboo, like people would love to act like you
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: never ever ever have to feel a way about anything,
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: Like jealousy is never a thing, and security is never
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: a thing like Miss Timmlerman says she had to tell
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: somebody like hold on, back up, off my man at
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: a meet and greet.
• 22:59
  Speaker 3: Let's take a lisk.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: I had a lady the other day coming full frontal
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: hug around the neck, and I say, ma'am, you can't
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: do that.
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: And what he was like, why, I said, because I said, no,
• 23:10
  Speaker 3: that's right. I say, you bold enough.
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: To do it.
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: I'm voting. I know that's right. Get off of him.
• 23:16
  Speaker 3: I know that's right. What if you weren't even fresh,
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: I know that's right. Give me fifty baby. I mean
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: that Coogar was.
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: Like, oh yeah, people love to act like these real
• 23:36
  Speaker 4: moments don't happen, And now I'm learning like, no, they do.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: But y'all just find a way.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: First of all, you set your boundary as she did,
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: and as I'm sure he will move it forward period.
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: But also you just find a way to like not
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: let that throw away everything else until that moment, and
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: you move forward better like that is the goal. And
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: that's what I took from Emmon's conversation, the conversation that
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: you know, I watched Jamal Bryant and his wife have
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: with the man's as well, as like, all of these
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: things will come.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: I don't care if you did.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: You're the most blessed, sanctified holy water on the you
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: know what I mean, the white cracked and the cranberry juice,
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: all of the tongues and the stomping. I don't care
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: how all of that you are or the complete opposite.
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: These things will come in a relationship and what are
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: you doing to deal with it? And y'all, I'm like,
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: really up, grown up at this point because now.
• 24:30
  Speaker 3: I know, I be like before I used to know
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: I was on BS and I wouldn't care.
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't care whatever now in this news space, baby, Okay,
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: we might be on we might be on BS a
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: little bit every now and then. I feel like you
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: got to do just a little just a little razzle
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: dazzle so that you know, talking about sertain boundaries, so
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: that you know, Bay knows, don't play with me. But
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: a lot of accountability, like you know, it's happening in
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: this era of my life, a lot of it, and
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: I'm happy about it. It's not always easy, but I
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: am happy about it though, because I feel like it's
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: not even about for the other person or maintaining a
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: relationship for myself. I'm always in a good space when
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: i'm accountable because I'm like, all right, and even if
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: the accountability is hard, because I'll fight you to the end,
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: I'll defend something to the end. But sometimes in what
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: I'm learning now, even when I do that, I'll come
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: back and be like, Okay, this was wrong, this was right.
• 25:25
  Speaker 3: Whatever.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: That helps me personally because I'm learning a lot about
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: myself in my weak spots, the spots that I need
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: improvement on, that I could do better on, that I
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: can maybe get a little help with, you know, like
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: you know, therapy, whatever the case may be. Like, I'm
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: learning so much about the things that aren't perfect about me,
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: and it helps me so much navigate my relationships with people.
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: So now it's like, you know, everything is in somebody
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: else's fault, and that has changed my life a lot.
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: It's made some things harder because you want things to
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: be somebody else's fault sometimes because it's just easier to
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: get through.
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: But that has really changed my outlook on so much.
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: In life in general, just for myself, and of course
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: going back to the you know, the relationship and not
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: even just like a relationship boyfriend, girlfriend, but even in
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: my friendships, and it also in my work relationships and
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: also to like, I think one of the things that
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: I do a lot of, you know, as the oldest
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: kid in my family, the only girl, it's like, you know,
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: the eldest daughter is like it is a beautiful thing,
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: but it's also traumatizing as hell because you are put
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: in a position where, like, life hits and you just
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: have to figure it out so many times, and sometimes
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: from a very early age, and.
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: It builds you to this strong person that like.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: Just is so like, ain't nobody, ain't no stop being
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: a snaw. Oh you heard it, you heard the little harmony,
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: you heard it? Okay, it builds you into one of
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: those types of people. But at the same time, behind
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: the scenes, you're exhausted, you burnt out, your miser you're sad, sometimes,
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: you're lonely, you're they're all these things that you feel.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: And I'm getting to a space where I'm learning to
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: not take a lot of those things on, to just
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: deal with things as they come, be okay with the
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: cars that were dealt to me, and not internalize a
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: lot of things because some of it just really ain't
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: my fault now, the stuff that is my fault, I'm
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: able to better identify now, and I'm getting even better
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: at it.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: I'm at the beginning stages. But don't worry.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: We're gonna put this baby in sport because it's always
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: an AMG Okay, we always AMG line over here. But
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: until I get to the full force of what that
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: looks like. Just even in these beginning phases, it's really
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: been helpful to be able to look internally and understand
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: what I should digest, what I should hold onto, what
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: I should be accountable for, and which just really, like god,
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: am I control for real? Like period Like, there are
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: some things that are just out of my control and
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: it's nothing I could do about it.
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: So I'm taking all that in.
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: I'm learning all of that as I go through these
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: different phases of life and people get older and I
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: get older, and I'm talking about buying I can't believe
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about.
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: You know, marriage and you know all that.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: I can believe it, But I just don't feel that
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: age yet. Like you know, I always thought when I
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: got to like the ages that I used to think
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: were old, you would feel it. I feel like just
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: yesterday I was walking on to my college campus, like
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: trying to figure out life, and now here I am
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: Latest with Lorna Rosa. The podcast eight million audio downloads later,
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: The Low Riders y'all are here and we talking about marriage, accountability,
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: therapy and me wanting to get my together because I
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: love people. I'm not mad at it. It's a journey
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: and now look we're just starting. Okay, we are just starting.
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: So hold me accountable, but like you know not, don't
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: hold me too long. Take your girl off for a
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: drink or put me down to take me off for
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: a drink a little bit in there, but still hold
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: me accountable. This has been another episode of the Latest
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: with Lauren Rosa. I'm your host, Laura l Rosa, and
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: I tell you guys every episode my Lowriders. Listen, y'all
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: could be anywhere with any old body, but if you
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: choose to be right here with me, I appreciate you
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: guys for that. I'll see you in my next episode.