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Mom--Shut Up!!! · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Mom, shut up, it's one more thing.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: One more thing. Wow, Katie Green weighing in with a
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: story on the One More Thing podcast.
• 0:13
  Speaker 3: I know you'd never be so disrespectful to your own
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: sainted mother. I want to hear more about this, but
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: a couple of things. Very quickly before we dive into that.
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: We talked a bit about I guess was Wall Street
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: Journal had a big article about the backlash sports gambling,
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: all the scandals, many of which have not reached the
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: bulk of the media, the non sports media, I should say,
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: And I hadn't heard about a lot of these cases,
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: but there were way more than we had a chance
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: to get to on the air. College baseball coaches giving
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: inside information to betters, all sorts of stuff. Sports has
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: got an enormous challenge right now with betting. They are
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: so in bed with gambling, and it's so pervasive, and
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: I mean, who even thinks about college baseball, much less
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: bets on it, much less wants to somehow fix the game?
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: Right. You wouldn't had to worry about it in previous
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: years because there wouldn't have been enough money to be made,
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: but now there is. There's so many people betting on
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: so many things.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: Right exactly, So anyway, that's gonna be a big story.
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: Also tried to cram in at the very very end
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: of the show, the Babylon b had a bit ten
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: changes Trump made in the God Bless the USA Bible.
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: You probably heard the story Trump has licensed his name
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: an image to some company that's putting out a combo
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: Bible and America's founding documents thing.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: It's the only official Donald Trump Lee Greenwood Bible, Joe
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: for sixty.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Dollars the Bible, and Jack's gotta have.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: It, and I gotta have it, especially heading into Good Friday.
• 1:46
  Speaker 4: The funny thing about Trump.
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: Is if he really isn't into something, he doesn't know
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: much about it, he's brand new to it, like Christianity
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: or history is he'll say crazy stuff, like he said
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: the other day, the Bible, it's my favorite book.
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: It's a great book. I have many of it, many
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: many Bibles. Its great book.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you don't have to tout the Bible. You don't
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: have to say it's a great book. And like when
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: he said, this is one of the funniest things he's
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: ever said. Abraham Lincoln, the late Great Abraham Lincoln, you
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: don't need to pump up Abe Lincoln. You don't have
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: to say I approve, I thought he was good.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Right. If you're into history, you don't need a
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: up with Lincoln adjective or something like that. And if
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: you're religious, you don't say my religious. I've got so
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: many Bibles. That's not a thing.
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: No, the Bible one of my favorite books.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: I've got so many of them around the house. That's
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: not the way the whole Bible thing works. You usually
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: have like one that you care about.
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: Anyway, So the folks at the Babylon b who are
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: no liberals, thought the whole idea was pretty funny, and
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: they had their top ten changes Trump made in The
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: God Bless the USA Bible. Number one, Moses has to
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: hold up the American flag so Israelites can win in battle.
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: That's a variation on a story from the Old Testament.
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: Two Proverbs is replaced with a collection.
• 3:11
  Speaker 4: Of Trump's finest tweets.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: A book full of Wisdom, two hundred and eighty characters
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: at a time. The New Testament now includes the full
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: text of Trump The Art of the Deal. The two
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: greatest books in history are now together in one volume.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: A number four Joseph's coat of many colors is now orange,
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: a very beautiful orange. People love the orange coat, everyone
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: says so. Number five Jesus is betrayed by a kiss
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: from Mike Pence. Never trust Pence, short guy, fly on head,
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  Speaker 3: not trustworthy, not loyal.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: Number six all fly on Pence's face.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: That was memes central for a while.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely Number six.
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  Speaker 3: All Biblical villains now have nicknames Phony Pharaoh, Nasty, Nebukin, Ezzer,
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: and Lion Lucifer.
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: That's so good.
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: In the New Trump Bible, the first apostle Jesus calls
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: is Ben Franklin. Put down your kite and follow me,
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: not Peter the Great, the Late Great Ben Franklin. Number eight,
• 4:21
  Speaker 3: twenty third Psalm is replaced with the lyrics to American Pie.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: Such a beautiful song. Let's make Psalm twenty three great again.
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: Number nine ravens feet Elijah by bringing a big back
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: and fries. And number ten brace yourselves. Jesus doesn't die
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: in this one. People prefer stories where the hero doesn't die.
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: Oo again from the Babylon b Oh. Anyway, speaking of unhappiness,
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: you're cursing out your mom or so somebody's moms, shut up?
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: Mom?
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  Speaker 4: What was it?
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: This blew my mind.
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  Speaker 5: The other day, my husband and I went to a
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  Speaker 5: restaurant and we're sitting there eating and I could just
• 5:09
  Speaker 5: overhear the conversation happening next to me. It's a mom
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  Speaker 5: and her daughter who's maybe thirteen.
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  Speaker 2: Are you maybe are you a person that can tune
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: out people next to you or can't tune out people?
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: I cannot, Yeah, and it rives me nuts.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: I easily can turn out conversations with me, but like
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: I have friends and family members who can't, and you
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: can't talk to them if there's someone else talking over
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: there because they can't stop listening to them. It's I
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: guess you're either built that way or you're not.
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: I have a very hard time tuning out extraneous audio.
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: Yeah, same here, so and I couldn't tune this out
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  Speaker 5: at all. And again, she was maybe thirteen, and they're
• 5:45
  Speaker 5: talking about something and they weren't agreeing, and this little
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: girl goes shut up mom, and the mom didn't react
• 5:55
  Speaker 5: and they continue to argue, and my jaw dropped because
• 6:00
  Speaker 5: when I was raised, telling my parents to shut up,
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  Speaker 5: I mean, I've never done that. I have never in
• 6:05
  Speaker 5: my life told my mom or dad to shut up
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  Speaker 5: in a serious manner. There was one time my dad
• 6:09
  Speaker 5: and I were joking around and I accidentally went to
• 6:12
  Speaker 5: shut up, and I stopped dead in my tracks in
• 6:15
  Speaker 5: fear because I was like, I know those words aren't uttered, right,
• 6:19
  Speaker 5: But I know parenting is changing generation generationally?
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: Is that okay? Now? Is telling your parents to shut
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: up like a normal thing? Jack? Have your kids ever dared?
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: One kid did once? But uh yeah no, that was
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: not okay. It did not go.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: Well, okay, kids, right?
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  Speaker 5: I just I don't know if there's if that's a
• 6:39
  Speaker 5: shift that's happening where the way you talk to your
• 6:42
  Speaker 5: parents is changing. But the way that the mom didn't react,
• 6:44
  Speaker 5: I'm sitting there going.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: What I wouldn't take it in any tone, But was
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: the tone kind of like the valley go oh, shut up?
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: No, they were. They were having a serious conversation.
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: Shut your pie hole.
• 6:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, so that certainly would not have washed in
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: my house. I think one of the kids may have
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: tried it at one point and it went very poorly.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: But how long is a generation?
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: They usually say twenty years?
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think okay, Well all right, then, well, at
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: least my oldest kid in your youngest kid.
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: I raised my kids during the previous generation, which is
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: kind of funny.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: Shut Up still is not fly with anybody I know.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: I don't think.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: If it does, you need to take a parent in class.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: Okay, Like Kevin Hart's got a bit where he's talking
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: about how it turns out he was mistaken but he
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: thought his kid he was yelling down to his kid
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: to do something, and he thought his kid yelled fu
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: said the words to him, and he just like gets
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: what He's like, what what just happened here? And the
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: crowd just goes berserk about the idea of a kid
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: saying that to their parents, which I was happy to hear,
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: but that was just like roundly seen as oh my god,
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: a nuclear bomb just went off. That is not okay.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: How is he going to react to this? It turns
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: out he mishurt his kid over something like that. But yeah, no,
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: shut up is not okay any but any world I
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  Speaker 2: know of.
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  Speaker 5: Okay, that brings me some comfort because the kid, the
• 8:15
  Speaker 5: girl was similar to your kid's age, and I was.
• 8:18
  Speaker 5: But the fact that the mom, I mean, she just
• 8:20
  Speaker 5: took it.
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: Oh boy, that I feel bad for both of them.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: Because almost guaranteed that a bad situation either happening or
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: going to happen.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember back when I was raising my kids
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: and would talk about it on the air, and people
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: would call in or you know, write in with questions
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: and that sort of thing.
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  Speaker 4: What I thought, And.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: A number of times I thought, my first piece of
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  Speaker 3: advice is get a time machine, because you're asking me,
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  Speaker 3: how do I undo fourteen years of getting it wrong?
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  Speaker 3: And yeah, you know, it's like after your fifth heart attack,
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: saying your doctor, you know, well, it's you know what
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: I'm saying. Oh, I came across a great thing on
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  Speaker 3: parenting that I was going to edit for the show
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: because it's long, but I wish, wish, wish I'd read
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  Speaker 3: it when my kids were young. Jonah Goldberg actually wrote it.
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: He's quoting a bunch of other people, but he's talking
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: about how there's a new book by a developmental psychologist
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: who had never heard of before, Alison Kropnik. But the
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: name of the book is The Gardener and the Carpenter,
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  Speaker 3: And she points out that the very word parenting really
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: only emerged in the fifties and didn't become popular until
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  Speaker 3: the seventies because until the fifties, people generally lived in
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: their hometown, near all their relatives, and they would just
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  Speaker 3: observe and everybody's there to help, and you didn't have
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  Speaker 3: to learn about parenting.
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  Speaker 4: It was self evident.
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  Speaker 3: You saw it all the time, and your mentors were
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  Speaker 3: around you anyway. But then in the seventies people got
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: more isolated, more mobile, they moved away and that sort
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  Speaker 3: of thing, and you had these parenting experts pop up.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: And often with no kids or mad kids.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: Right, that's right, Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, there's plenty of that too. But ms.
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  Speaker 3: Gropnick point says that parents began to think like carpenters,
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  Speaker 3: who have a clear idea in mind of what they're
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: trying to achieve. They look carefully at the materials they
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: have to work with, and it's their job to assemble
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: those materials into a finished project, the project or product
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  Speaker 3: that can be judged by everyone against clear standards. Are
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: the right angles, perfect, does the door work? Gropnik notes
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: that the messiness and veriability are a carpenter's enemies. Precision
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: and control are her allies. Measure twice cut once, et cetera,
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: and her thing. And I've got to admit I don't
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: want to get too deep into this because it's incredibly
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: serious and will make me very sad. But I I
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: was influenced by a calumnist to his so called parenting expert,
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: and he was very much of the carpenter school. And
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: when I ran into a kid with special needs, specifically
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: on the autism spectrum, that was the last thing I needed.
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  Speaker 3: The last thing I needed was a carpenter's point of
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  Speaker 3: view about parenting.
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: And MS.
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  Speaker 3: Gropnik's thing here and I haven't read the book is
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  Speaker 3: a better way to think about child rearing is as
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  Speaker 3: a gardener. Your job is to create a protected and
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: nurturing space for plants to flourish. It takes work, but
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  Speaker 3: you don't have to be a perfectionist. Weed the garden,
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  Speaker 3: water it, step back, and the plants will do their
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: things unpredictably and often with delightful surprises. And it's not
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: like a hippie dippy. Anything goes. She's talking about weeding
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: the garden and doing what needs to be done.
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  Speaker 4: But you're not a carpenter or a gardener.
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  Speaker 1: What exactly is the carpenter's way.
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  Speaker 4: I don't know what you're talking about.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: As far as the carpenter's view.
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: Would it be fair to say it's just like there's
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: one way to do it, one size fits all to
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: get this to come out right.
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: Essentially, Yeah, it's cut and dried. There are a list
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  Speaker 3: of rules. You follow him, it'll be fine. As opposed
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: to a garden, where it's much more about nurturing than
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: forcing that it's absolutely inevitably going to go sideways at times.
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: If you're a good carpenter, it doesn't go sideways. You
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: can make cabinet after cabinet after cabinet, and if a
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: mistake is or if something goes wrong, that's utterly unacceptable.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: Whereas as a gardener, something's always going to go wrong.
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: That's what the job is, and you have to adapt.
• 12:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: The only thing I could say to your situation you
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: ever heard, Katie, because I've kind of lived this myself,
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: is I've got one kid that's got all kinds of
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: diagnosed things, and kinds of medication and all kinds of things.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: He has said and done things that if his brother
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: did them, it would be the end of the world.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: But the kid that's got all these various situations, he
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: not all. He's in control of everything he does. And also,
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: if you react a certain way you're about. I mean,
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: she might have a kid that if she had said
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: anything to that kid at that moment about that, the
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: table's getting flipped over. I mean, the police are coming
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: that sort of thing. Possibly.
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  Speaker 5: I don't even think of that possible circumstance that there
• 13:18
  Speaker 5: could you know that all could have had that problem.
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: Final bit of wisdom learned too late, at least partially,
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: is when I first became a youth sports coach. I
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: think I went I can't remember where this came from,
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: but it was pointed out to me that you don't
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: coach all of your players the same.
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: You coach all of your players the way they need
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: to be coached.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: Some kids respond well to like the old school disciplined
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: to bark at him some because some kids shut down,
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: and you're not going to make them a better player
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: a better person doing that.
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: You got to figure out how to pick their locks.
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: And parenting's a.
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: Lot like that too. If you think it's as mathematical
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: and cut and dried as carpentry, you're gonna do it wrong.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: So how did the how did the things turn out
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: with the woman and the kid who said shut up?
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: Did they just eventually did they stop talking or did
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: they eventually get up and leave.
• 14:17
  Speaker 5: They went back and forth for like maybe another thirty seconds,
• 14:20
  Speaker 5: and then their food came and I checked out of
• 14:24
  Speaker 5: that conversation pretty much.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it shocked me.
• 14:28
  Speaker 5: But I like that gardening analogy because that makes more
• 14:31
  Speaker 5: sense that you're going to have more room to kind
• 14:33
  Speaker 5: of wiggle when things go awry.
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't know about that mom dealing with her kid,
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: but like, I only think about my parenting roughly eighty
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: percent of the time all day long.
• 14:44
  Speaker 4: So yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: Now that's not to say there are no rules in gardening.
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: For instance, if you feed gatorade to plants, they will die,
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: as outlined hilariously in the classic movie slash documentary Idiocracy.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: All right, of course that that it wasn't gatoraded, it
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: was called what brono brono or electrolytes.
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: Well, it's got electrolytes exactly.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Well, I guess that's it.