Latest / Petty and Unbothered / #9 - A West End Girl, Dumas, and comedy tickets
Transcript
- Robin Axline: Welcome back to Petty Ununbothered. Last time we unpacked part ⁓ one of Ellen's West End Girl ⁓ album. ⁓ this is part two ⁓ and I like we're diving deeper. So we're going to track more of the chaos, the pettiness. And she seriously didn't hold back. and it's as messy as it sounds. The more and more I listen to the album on repeat, the more things I pick up along the way. Tita Lors: ⁓ man, are we actually gonna like dive into the songs themselves? Robin Axline: ⁓ I, I do have a few notes on different songs. I'm not going to go crazy, but yeah. Yeah. ⁓ but I just think it's, it's funny because when I explain the album to folks, well, I mean, it was actually kind of one of my first takes too, like, how crazy is it to come up with an album airing like dirty laundry? Tita Lors: Okay. Yeah. Okay. I'm here for it. I can't wait. Robin Axline: Well, what's even crazier about it to me is you can hear the tension in the orchestrations but also in the lyrics of course and there's just so real tone to it. And also, like, this is happening in real time. There's still things unfolding, I feel like. ⁓ Yeah, yeah, but I mean, there's still like little things that keep popping up here and there. Like, basically... Tita Lors: Even now, haven't they been divorced for some time? Robin Axline: ⁓ I know for example, a lot of people, especially fans of hers, were criticizing the ex David Harbour and trying to do a boycott of the last season of Stranger Things. I guess, like, there's some notes that she received from him that, where he kind of, like, investigated her past and there's been some statements about, like, infidelity in some of, her other albums, too. And kind of some weird stuff that she's done as well. Kind of like, he's kind of throwing a little bit back. And coincidentally, yesterday on... Du Maw. There was a person, like an Anon tip that said, while, or Lily Allen and David Harbour are both in London, she's there to do her show. And then he was seen with a new gal at dinner in London. Like... Almost like on this, I don't know if it was the same night or around the night of the concert. And so people were like, hmm, that's so weird. that's a... Yeah, I mean, whatever. And this, I guess this gal isn't the costume designer that inspired the album was the main affair that he had. But I saw a picture in Dumont, she looked... Tita Lors: So it's not Madeline. Robin Axline: No, it's not Madeline. I mean, that's not I don't that's not even her name, really, though. That's like I get like a character name she gave. But the but the woman that was a costume designer, I still think it's funny that she came out and she was like, it was me. Like, I'm the one that was being sung about. I'm like, OK. And now, like 15 minutes of fame, like, cool. Tita Lors: that yeah I don't think I'd want people to that's that's not the fame I want Robin Axline: And there's actually one of the interludes, there's a phone call with Madeline talking to Lily and she's like, you know, that's not what he told me. And if I hadn't known, I wouldn't have been doing this. And, ⁓ You know, if a girl, like, if you need help or just want to talk or something, you can always call me or something. That's like weird. And this is all like, you know, part for the album. I don't know if that phone call actually existed, but it's kind of funny to imagine. And she didn't. I think what's interesting is she didn't totally put the blame on. Madeline. Tita Lors: my god, yeah. Well, because it's not all her fault. It takes two people to cheat, yeah, so. Yeah, exactly. Robin Axline: No, I mean, takes two to tango, as they say. But yeah, I just feel like the whole album is like, she agreed to an open marriage, maybe, reticently. ⁓ He broke the rules and it's been fully documented throughout the song cycle. ⁓ One of the things she brings up is the brownstone that they couldn't afford. And he had, the apartment was actually full of like love letters from his lovers that she found. I think it's really brutal because it's so specific. And so it really makes you think like, wow, this must be totally real. ⁓ And I guess he played tennis with a bunch of women. It's a lot. ⁓ But the brownstone issue is where they moved to New York. ⁓ She had her whole her up her whole family moved to this expensive place, which is on the architectural digest. I just rewatched it again to see if I could get any clues. I don't I didn't really notice much. I did notice he talked over her a couple of times and kind of like was distracted while she was talking. She did talk over him a couple of times, too, but. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Robin Axline: I think he was just really excited about this house and how much money he poured into it. Like every room is meticulously designed and pretty amazing house, to be honest. then she had the role and she had to move back to London. And that's kind of how this took place. Tita Lors: ⁓ dang. ⁓ Robin Axline: definitely got to watch the video because he he had an apartment before this apartment tour that i watched a long time ago Tita Lors: Yeah, very like, I feel like something that they would feature on Sex and the City. Robin Axline: Okay. I mean, yeah, possibly. Yeah, you gotta watch the... Yeah, you gotta watch the whole tour, because I think it's... All the little details is cool. And the other thing that I was thinking is like... How open she's been about talking about her personal struggles throughout her albums, but also she had a radio show on BBC with her friend. Tita Lors: No? Yeah, it's very unassuming. Okay, I'll watch that later. Robin Axline: It was called Miss Me. And then she just left the podcast, like, just a few months ago, not that long ago. ⁓ And it kind of made me think she. How did she come into my view? And I thought and thought and I was like, ⁓ yeah, I discovered her on my space. Like. Back in the like, you know, back in the day. Tita Lors: What? She's been around since MySpace? Robin Axline: Yeah, that's how I found out about her. And I was like, oh, yeah. Yeah, I was like, oh, she's one of those MySpace people that I listened to and then looked her up. And yeah, so I was like, dang, that's that is crazy that she's been around that long. Tita Lors: No way! Mm-hmm. That's a long time. I never realized that. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, and she, mean, it's crazy because the other thing is she has five studio albums too. So, I mean, she's been going. Tita Lors: My mind is blown. I'm like, what? I thought she was a recent person. A recent artist. Robin Axline: No. And what's crazy about this album too is that I found out that it was recorded in 16 days, which is really crazy, really quick. But I couldn't help but wonder. I couldn't help but wonder. If some of it came out of like the adrenaline of like the hurt and the frustration and all that because I feel like that can affect like the pace of your songwriting or just writing in general to fuel like some creativity sparks. So. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah, no, that makes a lot of sense to me. ⁓ there's a few things, like whenever I watch something and it makes me think of like a therapy theme or even like, Like, ⁓ this is really a good idea for this other thing. I have to like write it down immediately and get it all out. Like I obsessed. I heard this song in Tagalog and I got obsessed with translating it and like sending it to people and calling everybody and be like, tell me if this translation is accurate. I want to make sure that I'm understanding it. like spent a whole day just we my cousin and I ended up translating most of the song in a few hours because we kind of got a little bit obsessed and fell in love with this song so yeah like I could imagine if that's it happening to you create creatively Like even have this whole spiel about like that I could that I imagined myself posting at some point on what media I don't know I'm trying to still figure that out but like of why it's so meaningful to me and what What I connected with and fever Not fever dreamed but just like was it like I don't know what the word is the terminology but just really dove into that so that makes a lot of sense that Someone could write a whole album like that Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, I that was really fascinating. It doesn't always happen that way. So. And another thing that kind of came to mind regarding this album is like, feel like, yes, it's kind of a petty album, but petty doesn't always have to mean like mean. I feel like in this case, it's like more like an honest kind of clever boundary setting way to be petty. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yes. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I think it's important to highlight that too. Petty isn't mean. ⁓ There's definitely levels to it and the definition of it is just actually something small and trite and like whatever. Robin Axline: Yeah, it doesn't have to be something big. And on the album too, she talks about ⁓ leaving Tex on red on purpose. Just kind of like these little petty jabs that she happened to fall into on her journey, if you will. Tita Lors: digs, yeah. Robin Axline: So I just, yeah, I just wanted to point that out regarding Petty because I definitely think this album is that. ⁓ and also like after this album came out. and it started gaining traction. started, I guess with all artists lately is like they come up with special editions of things or like now vinyl is so fun. They'll put different like limited edition colors and things. So after her most recent, well, actually first off her album cover is kind of a painting of her and in March she gave it to the National Portrait Gallery in London which is a great place to visit if you haven't. ⁓ It's really neat and it's going to be displayed in there for a year. Her album cover, because it's a really nice drawing of her. So I thought that was pretty cool. the second kind of drop of her album came out like much later than when it originally came out. Well, it was like October and the newest iteration was in January this year. So the vinyl was a polka dot vinyl. and that included a limited edition USB flash drive shaped like a butt plug. You I was just like, whoa, that's insane. ⁓ Tita Lors: That's so funny. Robin Axline: Yeah. Tita Lors: ⁓ no. ⁓ That kind of reminds me of, have you seen those commercials? I don't even know if it's real or AI or a joke, but it's like. ⁓ allegedly apple coming out with like this thing that you can it's i forgot what the what the use of it was for but it was for your computer that you plugged it in and it was shaped like a butt plug and like had like all these different uses and blah blah blah and they had a lot of puns related to it being a butt plug but not exactly and i wish i remembered but yeah that one's funny yeah Robin Axline: I'll have to look that up later. That sounds pretty funny. Yeah, I wonder if that's even real. Tita Lors: Yeah, like this has to be AI, right? Like they would never, why would they do this? Someone on the creative team has to know it looks like a butt plug. Robin Axline: That is funny. But yeah, it's it's funny. Now she's like had decades in the spotlight. Basically, she's in her forties and then she has this album with a butt plug, I think. Tita Lors: Wait, she's in her forties? Do I not know who Lily Helen is? I always thought she was like, because there was controversy about the age gap, right? That doesn't seem like that big of an age gap anymore. How old is he? Robin Axline: I think he's like in his fifties. would know older than that. Like. Tita Lors: Like, do I not know anything? Robin Axline: I don't know. Tita Lors: I'm looking at the age gap. It's a 10 year age gap. Okay. That's not horrible. Robin Axline: It's not like a May to December or whatever. It's not that crazy. Tita Lors: Yeah. It's not that crazy. Especially since they met later in life. Robin Axline: Yeah, after she had children and... Yeah, I don't think that's that weird. But... Tita Lors: I've always thought she was so young. I don't know anything. Good on her. She's aging well. Robin Axline: That's too funny. ⁓ yeah, yeah, totally. mean, whatever she is doing, keep it up. Tita Lors: Yeah. Robin Axline: ⁓ gosh. yeah, so, no, no, no. No, no, it's all good. It's all good. We're just, I'm just putting it all out there. So yeah, I think it's, it's great that she's still in her forties and she's still making stuff that people want to listen to. I mean, I know that's kind of a crazy thing to say, but I'm just, I don't know, in the pop world. You never know. Hit and miss. Tita Lors: Okay, sorry. Didn't mean to derail. Yeah. Yeah. You'd... But yeah. I forgot what I was gonna say. Robin Axline: Let me just jump into a few of the tracks while you're thinking about it. ⁓ So the first track is called West End Girl, which is the title of the album. Tita Lors: Okay. Yep. Robin Axline: I feel like right off the bat it comes off as kind of defensive and a bit controlling because she is laying out the whole thing before anyone else can. So I don't know, I feel like it could be self-awareness or it could be like a control thing to like set the narrative on her terms, kind of. Tita Lors: Okay. Robin Axline: because I feel like a lot of this a lot of public knowledge about their relationship wasn't really as out there until this album came out so I feel like she kind of could have been just kind of hey this is my side of the story even though it's a little fantastical ⁓ I don't know if I mentioned this before, but there was talks that she was going to make a musical out of it and now it's actually, now it's actually happening. So I don't know if I mentioned that part, but I was reading something about that. It's really moving towards a stage production. So that's kind of cool. Tita Lors: You did. ⁓ no way. Production, yeah. Well, I was just gonna say about West End Girl, it's, know, whoever controls the media controls the story, right? Like, if you can get out there first and you can tell your side of the story first, then they're probably more likely to believe you than whoever comes out afterwards in defense of whatever you said, right? Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, so then moving on to track two is called ruminating. And we all know we all do a little ruminating here and there. Just a little bit sometimes, unfortunately. But basically, this one is really showing kind of her insecurity and how it kind of focuses on Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Just a tad bit. Hahaha Robin Axline: of like the shadows of like who hurt the relationship and thinking about jealousy and comparing herself to the others that he might be interested in and this one is more focusing on other people not just him so it's not really her pointing a finger at him just yet it's kind of just her in this limbo land Tita Lors: Yeah, yeah. like she's going through everyone's breakup right every girl's breakup that's don't we all do that when or haven't we all done that where we're in a relationship with someone and especially if they cheated or especially if we think that there might be another person involved you don't even know for sure but like this idea of ⁓ well because i didn't i don't look like this person that you like on instagram i'm not i don't look anything like the people you've dated in the past like why are you with me and really that insecurity about ourselves and the person that we're seeing and am I really somebody that you want to be with or or like well no wonder this happened because you never actually wanted me specifically. Robin Axline: too real. Like, yeah, 100%. Yeah. And then basically the next track is called Tennis. Tita Lors: You Robin Axline: And it talks kind of about him playing tennis in literally, but also kind of figuratively. And it's about kind of passive control and how these expectations that both of them had were kind of unspoken and not really clear and how there was a lot of tension building between them. Like their communication didn't sound particularly strong. And I think most people should know. Like, especially if you're gonna kind of change the dynamics of your relationship, like an E ⁓ situation. ⁓ Or not. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. And for those of you that don't know what ENM is, it's ethically non-monogamous. Robin Axline: Elite non-monogamous. However, I don't get the vibe that it was particularly that for them. It sounds a little like she was a pud, which is a person under duress, if you didn't know that. Tita Lors: Yeah, a little less ethical than or a little less on what I'm trying to say, a little more unethical than ethical. Right. Like if she was if this was a hell yes for her, I think this would have been different. Robin Axline: Different, yeah, yeah, definitely. Another thing that, this is like a side moment that came up in my research is that in a, I don't know if it was the relationship with him or a different one, but she had hired some women to have some ⁓ experiences with. And she said it wasn't cheating because it was with women. Yeah. Tita Lors: for herself? So it wouldn't be cheating if he had sex with men? Yeah, it's a double standard. Robin Axline: Yeah, see, that's what I'm saying. I'm like, it seems like a bit of a head scratcher there. It's like, where what logic are you using? Yeah. So when I came upon that, I was like, huh, that it's not in the story. So I was really I was like, huh, that's interesting side thing I read in research, but Tita Lors: Yeah. Robin Axline: And yes, I listen to the Dan Savage podcast probably way too much and I know a lot of these anagrams and things so... They will be popping up through our podcast, I'm sure. So yeah, I guess it kind of leaves you asking the question like, why avoid saying what you need? But I think it's just because like a no can feel unbearable. Tita Lors: You You Robin Axline: So with this tennis thing and them kind of not saying what they actually want. Tita Lors: And especially if you have a lot of issues with rejection, it's, or, you know, people with ADHD who struggle with rejection sensitivity, right? Like a no is really hard to hear. And so it's really hard to ask for what you want because it feels like rejection, even though it's not, but yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah. No, that's a perfect, yeah, perfect way to put it for sure. Yeah. So this album was such a wild ride because it's like stuff in her head and stuff that's going on and a little bit of probably what he's thinking too. Who knows? But then the next track, track five is called Madeline and the The actually what's I think is really cool is in the song tennis towards the end, she has like a little interlude with ⁓ a voicemail kind of thing. And then she starts singing about Madeline has like this really cool transition that kind of melts together. Tita Lors: Ooh, like they used to do in the 90s. Robin Axline: Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But then it goes into song. It almost feels like a musical in that element because you're singing and then it turns into this other mood and it's just really well pieced together. But the next one, Madeline is just kind of talking about her self-aware chaos and she knows she's spiraling, but it doesn't and it doesn't stop. Because now she knows there's this other woman and there could be more and all this and. I guess it's like, does awareness equal change? And I don't think it always does because sometimes it's just a justification. Tita Lors: Yeah. Or even just like, like, you know, again, therapy speak, but like, it's a form of therapy that you learn about in school is like motivational interviewing and trying to find out what stage of change people are in. And there's like. In the beginning. ⁓ There's pre-contemplation where it's like, you don't really notice that there's a problem, but maybe other people do. And then there's contemplation where you're starting to notice that there's a problem and an issue. There's awareness, but you don't want to do anything about it yet. And then, and then you go into action and then you go into hold on there's five. Let's see if I, know it's pre-contemplation, contemplation, action. I know seriously, ⁓ something, something, what something and then relapse is one of them, I think. or that might've been one that was added later. If you think about like, ⁓ recovery, cause this is used a lot, I think in like recovery. Robin Axline: It's your quiz time. ⁓ Tita Lors: related stuff. Yeah. it's awareness is great, but if you're not ready to do anything about it, then it's not that helpful. Robin Axline: Yeah, no. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Unaware, problem aware, solution aware, product aware, and most aware? I don't know if that's... No, that's business and marketing. Never mind. Never mind. I'm going to stop on this Googling right now. That was insane. Tita Lors: Yeah, I was like nope. Okay, hold on. guess so. That's weird that it's not. ⁓ hold on, hold on. Stages have changed. Robin Axline: I guess there's an awareness in business and marketing. ⁓ well, I think you hit the... Tita Lors: stages of change, motivational interviewing. Yes, pre-contemplation, contemplation, preparation is the one that I missed. where you're starting to actually do things to move into the action and action is where like you do the actual things that require you to move forward. And then maintenance is, you you're in this great spot or action or change has happened. ⁓ And so now we're maintaining it. And then where it goes into like recovery is relapse because it is very likely, especially in the beginning, this isn't like a circle thing, right? You don't go from pre-contemplation immediately in those ways of stages of change. You can go contemplation to preparation and then back to contemplation and then actually start taking to action and then back to contemplation and whatever, right? Like, get back into recovery quickly and feel supported and not judged. Yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah, you got to do the maintenance of it all too. It's not just going to fall into place and everything is hunky dory. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah, exactly. Right. Because you, I think a lot of the stuff that we don't think about is we have like, I call it a default setting, right? This is what you've known for a lot of your majority of life is this is how I handle life problems. Um, but it's not working for me anymore. So I want to do it differently. And since that's your default setting, when shit gets rough, and if you don't have the right supports around you, if you're unable to do all of your maintenance things then you're just gonna default back into it sometimes. I'm not saying that you'll fall all the way back into it but it's we have to really catch ourselves and be like ⁓ that's not what I want to do anymore, that's not who I want to be anymore. And it's that extra step out of, away from, either out of or away from that default setting. And sometimes it's hard to catch if you don't have the right supports around you. Yeah, ⁓ so a lot of people have a lot of shame around that and I don't think that they should. Robin Axline: Yeah. Yeah, totally. I. It's yeah, it's well said, totally, because it's a lot of people have that and then they just stop doing the work kind of because it's like too much. ⁓ Yeah. No, I, I, I this is ⁓ great, actually, because that's kind of how I was seeing this as ⁓ these real. Tita Lors: Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Sorry. I feel like I'm turning this like. ⁓ huh. Yeah. Robin Axline: issues that everybody can relate to in some way. But yeah, so back to the song called Madeline, I feel like it was kind of her version of Jolene, kind of, because it's kind of like speaking to Madeline in a way. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I wish I had listened to this beforehand. Robin Axline: I think at some point she does an American accent somewhere in there. Yeah, no. Well, now when you listen to it, you'll really like dig into it more. Like it might. Tita Lors: Yeah, I'll be I'm going to hear it from a different perspective now. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, you don't have a totally blank slate anymore, but that's fine. And then this is really funny that you said relapse because that's the next song title. I wonder if she did that on purpose or that's just coincidental, but that's pretty insane that you said relapse because I was like, Tita Lors: Mm-hmm, that's fine. ⁓ huh. That's funny. Yeah, well, because as you're like talking about it, it really sounds like she's going through the stages of change in each one of these like songs. Right. She's like, something doesn't feel right. I'm aware that something is wrong. ⁓ What do I want to do about it? And like, she's really going through that. So it's it's interesting. I wonder if she was like creating this album and if she was in therapy while she did it. Robin Axline: Yeah, well, I would imagine she would want to go to therapy if Tita Lors: Yeah. Robin Axline: Like, I hope she's still in there. After all that, that's a lot. ⁓ Well, so the. Tita Lors: Yeah, if she needs it. Yeah, seriously. Robin Axline: relapse of it all, know, like from knowing some of her history that she's like I mentioned, was she's always been pretty open about addiction and alcoholism and kind of relying on those as a crutch to cope sometimes. And so apparently, through this ⁓ debacle when it happened is she was sober. I don't I think she might still be I'm not sure. But in this relapse, one of the lyrics that she repeats is she's like I need a drink I need a Valium And it's like, ⁓ my bad. I think that's in, actually, I think that's in ruminating, perhaps. But the relapse kind of references that again. So it's kind of like she's relapsing and she's showing like her avoidance and like emotionally checking out instead of facing reality. Like. And I just, yeah, I just started thinking about, hmm, it's way easier sometimes to just avoid all of it and just tune out, which is sounded like was her ⁓ coping du jour for that sitch. But I don't know. Tita Lors: You Yeah, I mean, speaking from someone who's just spent the past like year or so in avoidance about a race, about an issue of my own, like that makes a lot of sense to me. You know, I call it whatever. I'm in this place with my friends. I'm like, listen, I know the problem exists and I see the problem, but I am I'm in Africa. I'm in denial. The river Nile. So we're just... we're not gonna do anything about it right now because I can't think of a solution or what to do or even if I'm ready to move forward and until I can then I'm in I'm in denial but floating on the river now and we're just in avoidance mode until something changes. Robin Axline: and god lord knows when those rivers shall meet you know so that's yay that's good ⁓ but yeah so i was just thinking like feelings or truth well i think it's kind of both because escaping truth has consequences eventually which is kind of what we were saying it's like Tita Lors: Yeah, seriously. Luckily, I'm not in denial anymore. I've moved past. Yay! ⁓ Robin Axline: it's gonna, it's gonna come to a head or, or, or it's just not gonna be addressed and it's gonna have this constant like feeling about escaping something that should be taken care of, perhaps. ⁓ so I'm gonna, yeah. yeah, yeah, I forgot. Yeah. So both of them is what I'm saying are not great. Tita Lors: Yeah. I mean, it's the same thing if you avoid your feelings too. Yeah. Yeah. Robin Axline: Now the next title after relapse is called Pussy Palace. And... I... It's kind of like a... I feel like this one's a bit petty. Because it's like got these like little little slights in there about like things that he did and... Tita Lors: Hahaha Okay. Robin Axline: then it's actually kind of like really heavy underneath and one of the lyrics is she's basically she found out somehow that his dojo was actually a pussy palace And so the lyric is, thought it was your pussy pal- or I thought it- a pussy pal is pussy pal is- I thought it was your dojo, dojo, dojo. ⁓ That's like the chorus. ⁓ And so. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Like where he was meeting people at or like? Robin Axline: I think, I don't know, see that's another thing is like, don't know if this is made up for the album or if that's true, but it does seem like she found ⁓ evidence. Cause there was another lyric where she's talking about how she found like a Dwayne Reed bag and it had condoms and stuff in it. Tita Lors: Yeah. You Robin Axline: So I think it's about her just kind of like discovering like it's crazier than she thought the open relationship and This and the song is so funny because it carries this really heavy like emotional weight, but the song is very light and fluffy Like almost comical. So there's this juxtaposition. That's so interesting and it comes across to me as a bit petty Like the way that she does it. It's almost like a teasing way of handling it but ⁓ moving on the next song is called 4chan stan I don't know if you know it, 4chan. I don't want to talk about it. It's... Tita Lors: Nope. ⁓ Okay, hold on, I'm looking it up. Robin Axline: I'm not gonna explain it to you is my what I'm gonna say, but ⁓ don't go on the website Tita Lors: you ⁓ what is it? Don't go on the website, okay. Robin Axline: It's just gross male bluh behavior, not good stuff. Tita Lors: An influential anonymous English language image website launched in 2003 where users post images and comments on various topics, including anime. blah, blah, blah. And often, okay, it's known for its minimal moderation, allowing and often fostering edgy content, memes, and sometimes toxic behavior. Okay. Or internet trolling. interesting. Okay, I want to. So Robin Axline: Yeah Tita Lors: It's on Netflix. know you haven't seen it. just watched it last night. And Thoreau, David Thoreau, something Thoreau, he's a like famous journalist, video journalist. He like dives into the Manosphere and talks to a whole bunch of like ⁓ influencers, the big like top influencers in this sector to try to understand. where they're coming from or why this is so important to them or why they're talking about women the way they're talking about them or even men. And I was like, what an interesting documentary. I don't know any of these people that he interviewed, but it's interesting to get their take. They're wrong, but. He was like, I dove into their background and why they feel this way. And it seems that a lot of them have a few things in common. Basically daddy issues. Yeah. Robin Axline: I hate that. Yeah. Tita Lors: It's either daddy issues or mom's like dad abandonment or mommy issues like their mom didn't have support so she was probably losing her mind or whatever. I liked growing up in poverty and just all this stuff and some of it was super comical too because This guy's like, ⁓ my mom would hate it if I said these things. She's not about that stuff, blah, blah, blah. And then the mom actually appeared on the documentary and she kept putting him in his place in some areas that I'm just like... Okay, you're such a man. Like, right, like a man's man. No woman's ever going to put you in your place. And yet here's your mom setting you straight because you're dumb. Like, come on. Because she's right. Like, what the hell? But yeah, sorry. Again, tangent. Robin Axline: Because you're dumb. No, no, no, it's all good. But yeah, so if you knew what I mean, probably a lot of people see that title and they're just like, don't know what that is. But it's like basically incel land to me. Yeah, 100 percent. pick. Yeah, the same same vibes. But she handles this. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Yeah, where I imagine these Manosphere people exist. Okay. Robin Axline: topic in this song like really humorously and it's a bit kind of sarcastic and unhinged and she just calls out a lot of his absurd behavior and kind of makes it funny. And it just seems like she's just kind of ⁓ i'm trying to think of like a good line but Tita Lors: What? Like what? Tell me. Robin Axline: ⁓ no, it'll come to me. I'm getting all the lyrics mixed up real quick, but, but yeah, she just does it in like this kind of cutting way. That's like, I feel like it's a bit maybe trying to protect herself. ⁓ but she does a good job of just kind of making it again, kind of like a funny, ironic song. Tita Lors: Okay. Okay. Robin Axline: ⁓ how does humor become a weapon in a relationship? Tita Lors: I mean, I think it's a good question one, because I don't think a lot of people consider that humor can become a weapon, right? Because we're sarcastic and bitey with our ⁓ with our partners and we we call it humor, right? But what we're really trying to do is be hurtful and try to say try to say and be like, ⁓ but it was a joke. But I meant it. ⁓ right? it can, but then people can really gaslight you into thinking you're a problem. Because you're, you're the problem. You're taking that joke too seriously. Kind of a thing. You know, and I think back to to one of my stories too, where I was like, well, if the shoe fits because of what one of my parents read in my journal, right? Like, Robin Axline: you Tita Lors: It could be problematic if I just, if like there wasn't anything wrong and I just kept saying, well, you know, and not hearing the other person out. And especially if they're like, well, that hurt me. And I'm not willing to, to accept that that person was hurt or to have a conversation and decide to be different. Right. Cause once somebody says that's not funny, I don't think it's funny. It's actually hurting me. Then then it's time to start. respecting that. Right and and I yeah I say this to my kids too it's funny to you but once that funny starts to be hurtful to somebody else it's not funny anymore. Robin Axline: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Yep. And I really, I've experienced that in my life where somebody's like, I'm just joking. It's funny. And I'm like, well, it's not funny to me. ⁓ you're being too sensitive. ⁓ Like, lighten up kind of thing. And it's just not cool, I think. Tita Lors: Yeah. No, or you're being a dick. Yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah, well, there's that as well, ⁓ but, yeah, I can I can totally relate to when it's not funny. It's not funny. Tita Lors: Yeah, but also that made me think about like Filipino culture as well, where like the the titos or the titas, like the aunts and uncles sometimes they'll these like underhanded things where you walk into like growing up for me especially like people They would say things that were compilates, right? Like, because there's a lot of colorism in the Filipino community. So you'll be, ⁓ if you're darker skinned, they, that's not great, right? So they would say things like, ⁓ you're so beautiful for like your skin tone or like, you, you would, you could be such at like an actor in the Philippines, but you know, you're, you, you're dark or something. or like something like they would always refer to, oh, you're such a black beauty. Yeah, yeah. And I was like out in the sun a lot. So so like, and then if I would say anything about how like that was hurtful to me, then they would be like, oh, but you know, you're you're so pretty. You're so you know, I didn't say and I didn't mean that to be hurtful. You're I was trying to tell you you're so beautiful and I'm like yeah but not like generally beautiful you just think ⁓ you're a relative wow I'm shocked that you're so beautiful because you have such dark skin Robin Axline: my gosh. Wow. That's so ridiculous. It's like under, it's like a backhanded compliment or whatever. Tita Lors: Yeah, right? Yeah, and exactly. Exactly. Yeah. And you're not allowed to feel bad about that or like upset. You're not supposed to to hear that part. And so, yeah, I think I think that's why I'm so like, if it's not funny or it doesn't feel good, like, you know, you shouldn't be saying those things. Yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, totally agree. But yeah, I just kind of pulled up some of those lyrics real quick just to give you some. Basically, well, the chorus I know it's she says, what a sad, sad man. It's giving 4chan Stan. Basically, you're a loser on 4chan. It's just like really funny, I think. But she's like. Tita Lors: Okay. Hahaha you Uh-huh. Robin Axline: You bought her a handbag, it wasn't cheap. I was in London, probably asleep. Did you go to Montauk for the weekend? And was there an encore? Did it pay dividends? Is that why? And then... It's like, she's asking all these questions like, what, is she famous? Like, why won't you tell me? It's just, she's like, this is outrageous. You're such a coward. You can't tell the truth. You love all the power, but you're not even cute. Boom. So that's what I meant by just kind of like being a bit like sarcasm kind of bitey on that one. Tita Lors: Ooh. Bye! Yeah. Like, it's almost like you're lucky you even got me. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, yeah, basically. That's kind of what she's digging into there. I'll get on to the next is non-monogamami. It's the next one. And it's like, essentially kind of like what happens when someone is too drained to engage. Like she's experiencing like emotional overwhelm and her capacity is just maxed out. And so to me, it kind of took a turn to be like their connection kind of just started disappearing without drama in a way. So it's a little bit sad, but it's just part of the journey. Well, the other thing I wanted to mention real quick about the album is that it covers a lot of different genres, and some people find that a little bit jarring. But to me, ⁓ the more I listen to it, I was like, ⁓ this is actually kind of fun because it's not, ⁓ One level so there's some that kind of bring about like a 90s drum and bass vibe ⁓ And then there's one where she has ⁓ Kind of a reggae vibe and she which she's had in past albums also And she gets ⁓ one of the top Guys I believe he's Jamaican to do vocals on that one with her so it's kind of it's got a cool vibe to it, in my opinion. So Just Enough is the next track on the record. And this one is kind of craving for that intensity because things have been kind of calm and chaos is what feels familiar to Lily and not stability at this moment. And so basically she's just like, why can't calm? Like, why can calm feel uncomfortable? And yeah, no. No. Tita Lors: I get that question. Sorry. Like again, keep interrupting you, but I get that question all the time. Right? Like, this, I'm in this healing space. I'm doing all the things I'm supposed to be doing and setting boundaries. I'm, you know, like behaving differently. And this is the person that I want to show up as this is who I want to be. And things are actually feeling pretty good and calm. Why do I still feel like another yet again, another reason why people tend to relapse is like exactly what you said. This is uncomfortable. This is not what I know and what I know. is that chaos and what I know is that default setting and learning how to regulate your body and your nervous system to this new change to this healed space because this isn't what it knows and it's looking for that familiarity like you said and it's looking for like that, ⁓ like what's this, this normal or what was normal. And so this new place isn't, and it's so jarring for people to sit in it because it's like, I don't know. I don't know how to relax. I don't know how to be still. I don't know how to not fight. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, I feel like that and also just kind of like in some cases, maybe almost like, when is the shoe going to drop kind of thing? Like, is this fine? But it's like when you're operating in that as like your baseline for so long, it's like, ⁓ well, I guess like I adapted to this chaos for now. And then what's next? It's very unsettling. Tita Lors: Yes, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also when you said that, I thought about like, especially when it comes to, ⁓ like, ⁓ trauma or abuse, especially it's the calm before the storm is always the scariest place to be. Cause you know, shit's about to go down and you have no idea what for or why, and you're preparing yourself to receive it. And you're like walking on eggshells and you're like, So your body is super tense. it kind of also makes sense that when it's calm, you're also, that's, that's what you're thinking too, that like, Oh my God, something bad is about to happen because typically something bad did happen. Yeah. Exactly. Robin Axline: Mm hmm. The cycle of it all. Yeah. Yeah, that's so I mean, that's so super relatable and that she would kind of write about that is really interesting, I thought, for sure. ⁓ And moving right along, we have Dallas Major is the next title. ⁓ And this one is kind of like, again, about staying too long, leaving feels impossible. And the hope just kind of traps her. And it's that question is like, why do people stay or feel stuck when they know it's over is such a It's like, well, like kind of with the last song is like, well, there's this emotional inertia or like a habit. You feel attachment like, ⁓ it's yeah. So I thought that was really nice that she kind of those two songs kind of intertwined a bit with that message. And so then the next one is called Big For Me. And then see, it's starting to get a little heavy. It kind of goes up and down. But again, like some of the music is lighter than the topic. So it kind of evens it out. And yeah, yeah. And sometimes you're not even listening to the lyrics. You're just like, ⁓ this is a bop. And then if you really listen to it, you're like, holy shit. So. Tita Lors: doesn't feel heavy, yeah. Like, like all of us who grew up in like the 90s listening to music that we listened to back then right now and being like, wait, that's what this is about. Yeah, like, wait, pause. What? What was I singing about when I was 10 years old? Robin Axline: Mm-hmm. Yeah. ⁓ yeah, 100%. I'm still finding those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ⁓ yeah. Yeah. But yeah, so this is kind of the big for me is like, I idealizing something, but it's meeting reality. So the like, this pedestal crash is inevitable and like projecting onto somebody what you want, but you're really just setting yourself up for the point. Yeah, I'm sorry. Disappointment. So. It's kind of basically her just kind of, again, talking about things that are in her head and what she wishes would happen. And it kind of talk, it's, it's what we were talking about earlier. It's like the comparison to others. And, you know, when you see that person on Instagram and you're like, why isn't it me kind of thing or what? So yeah, yeah. So there's that. then track 13 is called let you win. Tita Lors: Mm, yeah. Why didn't they choose me? Robin Axline: but it's like let you w slash i n. ⁓ And this is more, yeah, let you w in. I am not sure what that's referring to. Tita Lors: Okay. Let you in. Go ahead. ⁓ Robin Axline: Yeah, W slash I N, yeah. So just double checking. But yeah, this one is like about tentative vulnerability and like testing trust after all the chaos. And so it's kind of a little of a little bit of Tita Lors: Hahaha You Robin Axline: Tension still lives here, but you wonder, is she opening up to more possibilities and things, or is she still just kind of tolerating what's been happening? So it's... it's again kind of in that liminal space where you don't know exactly where your feet are landing, but it sounded like she was like trying to have a new life and change for herself. then the last song is called Fruity Loop and It's literally kind of like circling back to the first song and just kind of... wrapping up the story in a neat little package. And it's talking about being a messy human, being a bit unfiltered, reflecting what is like messy and what's honesty, those kinds of ⁓ themes that keep coming up in the album. And... Yeah, I think she really, like I said, she kind of wrapped it up neatly in a nice little bow where it kind of brought it all to a head and again would make a nice musical, I'm sure. ⁓ Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah. To close it out and be like, well, this was the problem and here's how I solved it. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure. And I feel like the lyrics kind of bring it back to like, almost trying to think of the album title, but there's a song on one of her older albums that really aligns with this kind of feeling of dealing with just kind of the messiness and the chaos and what life looks like now that I'm being a bit unfiltered. But I guess my take also is that this is probably the most mature album that she's made and the old Lily would have been proud. it's sad but it's somehow like a lot more powerful. Tita Lors: Oh, yeah, well, you'd think at 40, she'd be a little bit more. She'd have learned a little bit, but, you know, sometimes it's hard. It's some lessons are really hard to learn. I going it. Wait, we're around the same age, right? Like, yeah, because I'm turning 40 this year and I'm like. Robin Axline: Well... Tita Lors: I guess we're learning that lesson again. Doing this again, it's rough. ⁓ But yeah, and also I was just ⁓ thinking, kind of as you were saying, know, younger Lily would be proud. was thinking about, I asked you if you watched the Hannah Montana special. ⁓ Robin Axline: You Tita Lors: Yeah, and in it she at the very end she has she debuts like a new song. It's such a beautiful song from like, I don't I think it's from her younger self to herself now or maybe like a tribute. to her younger self as a grown up person now and like reconnecting with that part of you and showing up for that part of you and circling back to that moment. it's so, it's, that's what this or how you're describing it is making me think of that. Robin Axline: Well, yeah, definitely got to check that out. It sounds really nice when you're maturing and you can kind of reflect on that and zoom out for just a minute is really important. ⁓ I just ⁓ side note, I did just remember what. So the last song says it's not me, it's you. Tita Lors: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Robin Axline: And that was actually the title of her 2009 album, It's Not Me, It's You. So it's kind of like this loop that she's been wanting to close maybe for the past 16 years. So I thought that was really interesting that she would do that. Tita Lors: ⁓ wow. Robin Axline: So yeah, if y'all haven't given it a listen, I don't... It's not gonna be like album of the year or it wasn't at the Grammys. But, I don't think it's the best album I've ever heard, but I just really got into it with the storytelling of it all. And the more I just kind of wanted to ⁓ bring it up because it kind of is the ultimate petty to make an album about. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. ⁓ huh. To air all of this stuff, yeah. Robin Axline: like everything and basically, yeah, yeah, for sure. And it just had to be done in two pieces. So. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. No fair. We needed the backstory and then we needed the album story. No, I love it. Well done. Mm-hmm. Robin Axline: Thank you, I tried. Thanks for bearing with me through all that. ⁓ But ⁓ yeah, I don't, I feel like we're short on time. I don't know if we have time for a petty battle. Maybe not. Tita Lors: Well, we're going to do it anyways. Robin Axline: you Tita Lors: We'll just cut the last part of mine and this part we're gonna put them together and it'll be separate episode Robin Axline: Okay, or you can cut my whole episode. Tita Lors: No! Never! Okay, let's do it, but is it okay if I potty? I go potty. Robin Axline: This is like one of the first days I've had the window open. It's like 50 out, but it's just nice to have a breeze. Tita Lors: Yeah. Where's my Petty Battle? There it is. Okay. All right. Who's going first? Petty Battle! Robin Axline: Hooray! Tita Lors: Okay, do you me to go first since you you just did all that talking you want to take a break? Okay, awesome. So this, I called it Dumas because she names the other person in this story Dumas. ⁓ Robin Axline: Yeah, that would be great. I can't wait. Tita Lors: least that's how I'm saying it. So it is by, it's from r slash revenge and it's by a deleted account. Um, actually, I don't know if it's a he or she, so whatever. Um, okay. So like all of us, I married young and my wife and I lacked the skills to navigate raising children and maintaining a healthy relationship. Um, so I guess it's a he, my bad. Around the 15 year mark, we were both feeling unappreciated and unfulfilled. And she gained the attention of a man we'll call Dumas. While I was fighting, while I was fighting too little too late to save our marriage, Dumas was texting her at all times of the day and night. Filling her head with the things a woman who's unhappy in her marriage loves to hear. Shooting fish in a barrel and just couldn't compete. And I just couldn't compete. It was what she wanted. The compliments, the attention, she ate it up. Robin Axline: so funny, I'm sorry. Already. Just laughed it up with a spoon. ⁓ Yeah. Tita Lors: Exactly. I mean, they're telling the story really well. I could hear them saying, I could hear myself saying this or like one of my friends saying these things. Yeah. And I picked it because it's a cheating story. Robin Axline: Yeah, totally. Okay. ⁓ Tita Lors: Exactly. Yeah, I did it in themed with what you were doing. Okay, so bad turned to worse and she left me for him, got engaged, pregnant and had his baby. I tried not to care or ask a lot of questions of our kids, but it became apparent that things weren't going so well. They never married. After the baby was born, our kids told me they weren't sleeping in the same room anymore. Eventually I learned that they weren't together. but were sharing parenting duties for the sake of their child. For context, this asshat was a boss babe, constantly falling for every pyramid scheme out there, from fruit juice at cocaine prices. What? Hold on, I'll get it together. Robin Axline: major city or something. I mean, ⁓ man, okay. Tita Lors: Okay, fruit juices at cocaine prices, knives to essential oils, you get the picture. He would refuse to buy my kids lunch or pay for anything while living rent free in the house that I paid for. He even went so far as to buy his own refrigerator and padlock it so my kids wouldn't eat his food. Wow. That's insane. Time went by and I let go of my anger as it wasn't helping and my relationship with my ex improved to the point where we would have dinner with the kids together and communicate via text or email without the vitriol of the proceeding four years or so. One day she confided in me that she was sure he was reading our texts and emails. I told her she should get a new phone and change her passwords and she said, I don't care. He can read whatever he wants. This is where the story gets good. Remember how he liked to text my wife and try to break my kids home? Every time from that moment forward, each time we interacted, I'd send my ex a text saying, had a great time. We should do that again soon. Or some variation of that with an emoji of some sort. For five years, I kept that up. not knowing if my shots were hitting the target. Eventually, his behavior got so bad she threw him out and the custody battle began. Dumas showed up in court with 2000 pages of my text and emails trying to prove that she was cheating on him. In a no fault state where they never married, the realization that my long game paid off, that I had lived in his brainless head for five years rent free was one of the best days of my life. Fuck you Dumas, you got everything you deserved. Robin Axline: Man, I just can't believe five years of that though. Tita Lors: ⁓ my god, yeah, that is some long game. Like, what is the purpose of that? But also, wow. on you consistency is key. Robin Axline: Yeah. And it's also funny how the kids were kind of like acting as like almost little spies saying like. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah, and he wasn't really asking, which is great. Good for him because you don't want to. You don't want to put your kids between all of that. Yeah, yeah. Do you want to read it now or read it all later like we usually do? OK, I'm going to bring it. Yeah, that's totally fine. I'm just going to bring up the other file while you get your story ready. Robin Axline: when you are. Okay so this one came up on Instagram for me. It's a comedian Krista Mariani talking on the Whiskey Ginger podcast. ⁓ Tita Lors: All right, let's go. I'm ready. Robin Axline: So she says, I'm just gonna read what she actually said. One time this guy, he asked if I wanted to go see Adam Sandler live, my favorite comedian. And I was like, yeah, sure, I'll go with you. And he did something and I didn't wanna hang out with him more than just going to see that. Tita Lors: I get it, that's real. I've been there. Robin Axline: ⁓ and then he dangled in my face like a carrot saying, ⁓ okay, we won't go to the show. And I was like, okay, that's fine. But he like really rubbed it in my face. So I bought Adam Sandler tickets right in the front row. They were like a grand, so expensive. Tita Lors: Yeah Yeah. Robin Axline: I did not have that kind of money and I drove three hours. And then he sent me a picture of where he was and said, look at these seats I have. Then I sent him a picture back because my seats were way better than what he had. And then I sent the Adam Sandler meme. Tita Lors: haha Robin Axline: I'm not showing it it's I know it's from it's from Happy Gilmore. I'm Sandler Meane where he says somebody's closer Tita Lors: Hahaha Robin Axline: I like that movie. ⁓ And it was so worth it and I felt so good and I blocked him. I couldn't make rent that month but it was like I got that guy. I fucking got him. The end. Tita Lors: ⁓ man, that's funny. Robin Axline: I just thought that was a really good, ⁓ petty one where she did sure got him. I'm sure he didn't like that. Tita Lors: Yeah, she did. Yeah, was probably like the what? You're here. How are you so close? I know. Yeah. And also, like the manipulation of it all is crazy, which gives me like flashback memory to something. ⁓ Robin Axline: Yeah, after all that. Tita Lors: So like, I was living at this apartment with my friend, one of my other best friends, and ⁓ like I had met this person just in passing, and we started talking and flirting and like kind of seeing each other. And I had mentioned that I wanted to, like for New Year's Eve, I was going to take myself to ⁓ Oregon and Washington. because there were some hikes that I wanted to do and there was this event for New Year's Eve that I wanted to go to and so I bought myself tickets or was buying myself tickets and I was gonna do that and that whole year I was just doing things by myself and really just focusing on me. I had a hard breakup before that and it like just a lot of things happened it was just a breakup but like Anyways, so he decided he wanted to come and I was like, cool, solid. And there were things I paid for and things that he paid for, ⁓ because discounts or whatever that way. And I paid him back in cash, which in hindsight, I never should have done because there's no proof or evidence that I did that. And I guess like, I was like, right. Yeah. So we went and I'm, we're in this completely different state, different city, everything. And I guess I was pissing him off because I was. not under the expectation that we were there together. Like we're not, we're not in a relationship. We like have seen each other a few times, but we've never had a conversation about anything. ⁓ and like you, you know, whatever. So he kept treating it like, or treating me or expecting me to behave as if like, I don't know that he was my boyfriend, like giving him girlfriend material, which I don't give girlfriend material for free. My guy, like, We're either in a relationship or we're not. And he just started to get weird. And on the last day, like got upset at me about something and basically threatened to leave me stranded that he was going to cancel my ticket. And I was like, why would you do that? I've already paid you for it. And he's like, well, do you have proof? Where's your evidence? And I was like, already trying to scheme all the ways that could get back at this person when I got back home. And I was like, you could totally do that. That's fine. You'd be a real asshole if you did, but do what you got to do. Yeah. Right? I know. I was like, I don't understand. We didn't come here. as a couple, we didn't come here for that purpose. I said, this is supposed to be my trip by myself that you're just kind of piggybacking on and coming with me. And I'm totally fine to do these things with you and alongside you. But the way you're treating me. Like, and it was also like lots of red flags. So for me to be like, ⁓ yeah, I don't actually want to be in a relationship with you. I'm actually upset that you're here. I would have had so much more fun if you weren't here. There are so many things I could have done and I'm very social. could have met like not like not to hook up but like made friends and like talked to other people and done a whole bunch of other things if you weren't here with me. But yeah. Robin Axline: ⁓ no. Tita Lors: Yeah, I know he didn't strike me as the kind of person who would do something like that. He's like, yeah, it just quickly. At one eighty, yeah, and I was like, wow, that's not what I like. think he was expecting me to like do stuff for and with him. And I was like, why? Robin Axline: Why? For why? that's funny. Yeah, well thanks for sharing that. That was like, oof, what a story. I'm sorry your ⁓ trip wasn't as great as it probably could have been without that fool. Tita Lors: Seriously, I just did a fun trip. I made the best out of the trip. ⁓ I probably still did things by myself. Because we're not. It's not us being together, but. Mm-hmm, seriously. But yeah, anyways, like, guess I had, because I was on Tinder, and I had, like, matched, up matching somebody while I was there. And so later on, I went back to Seattle to meet with that person and, hang out with that person. That guy was actually way cooler. But obviously, it didn't work out. Yes, exactly. Robin Axline: Well, then you wouldn't have your guy now. Tita Lors: Exactly. Yeah. No, and that that guy actually and I are still kind of friends like we every once in a while will like chit chat on them on the socials or whatever. And he's actually super cool with like ⁓ all of the projects and things that he's getting into. ⁓ So I like I'm happy for him and wherever his life takes him. Yeah. All right, let's rate this stuff. Robin Axline: Yeah, that's nice. Okay. Yeah, that was fun. All right. Tita Lors: Okay, so let me cover this because I don't want to see the totals just yet. All right, let's do Dumas first. How? Robin Axline: His name just cracked me for one. Tita Lors: I'm sure it's supposed to be like dumbass, but I love saying dumas. Okay, so how trivial? Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah, How trivial are the results? Yeah, well, what are we saying the result is? The result is that like... Robin Axline: Cause like, ⁓ yeah, cause he... Tita Lors: ⁓ So this guy's trying to prove that his ex cheated on him even though they never got married. So the result is just that he kept getting his feelings hurt because he thought... He got his comeuppance. Whatever was done to the original poster ⁓ got done to him in return except that no one actually cheated. Robin Axline: That's true! I didn't even think about it that way, but it is. Like, he already did that. ⁓ my goodness. Yeah. So... I don't think it's very trivial then, because it was like pretty... big. I just can't... Yeah, and I... I'm mad at the wife for letting him look at her text messages. I think that's insane! Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah, it was probably messing with him for a while. Yeah. But also, like, if you're looking for trouble, you're going to find it. Robin Axline: Like why is she just like... Anyway, I hope it taught him a lesson about peeping text messages, but it probably didn't because he sounds like a dumbass. Tita Lors: Yeah, or he's probably like, ⁓ I'm so glad that I did because now I found out that you were cheating on me. When she wasn't. I know seriously. Petty side eye. ⁓ Robin Axline: Yeah, that's true. Hard eye roll. So, yeah. gosh, I... Tita Lors: Yeah, I put it in the higher bracket, I think, of like... He's like 7. I don't know, it makes me really happy. Just like small little comments here and there. He was constant, consistent. He's committed. Robin Axline: Yeah, no, totally. Yeah, alright, let's go seven then. In that case, you sold me. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah. Okay. How spiteful. That's pretty spiteful. Robin Axline: ⁓ that was pretty spiteful. I mean, it's one of the most spitefuls we've had, I think. Tita Lors: Yeah, yeah, okay. Where's your head at in this one? Okay, are we thinking, are we thinking 10? Is that that spiteful? Are we thinking like eight or nine? Okay. Okay, how much of an overreaction? Robin Axline: Oof. I'm gonna go eight. I need to be a little conservative on this. Tita Lors: How much is he overreacting? I don't think he's overreacting that much because he's just kind of jabbing. He's just kind of saying stuff. It's not real life. He definitely didn't have to do it though. He could have just let things lie where they are. Is this something he would do if that other person wasn't in the picture? I don't think so. He was like getting along better with her. So he didn't have to say those things. He was putting, again, putting effort into it. it's definitely an overreaction, but how big of an overreaction? Robin Axline: Right. Yeah. I think like, it's pretty mild. Maybe like three and a half, four? Tita Lors: Okay, yeah, I was thinking like in the middle of like a five, but let's go, let's go for it. Okay. Now the Adam Sandler tickets. Okay, so how trivial. Robin Axline: ⁓ yeah, Adam Sandler tickets. I don't think it's that trivial. It's just kind of like, blah. Tita Lors: I don't think so either. Yeah, I don't think it's She could not afford rent. Robin Axline: Yeah, I mean that's pretty nuts. I mean at least she was happy about it, but still. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Exactly. So I would also put this pretty high as well. Like if you're putting yourself in debt to for the results that you want. mm hmm. Yeah, so it's not a... The result is that like she was happy about it, but also she couldn't afford her rent the next month. So. Okay. I'll go with that. Sure. How spiteful. I think it's pretty spiteful. Uh huh. Yeah, like, oh, you think you're better than me? You think you can tangle this in front of me? Well, check me out. Do all of these things that are kind of an inconvenience to me just to make you feel bad about yourself. Robin Axline: I'm gonna put myself in debt and drive three hours I mean granted it was apparently your favorite comedian but still. That's crazy. I think it was like seven? Seven and a half? What do you think? Tita Lors: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Seven, okay. I'm trying to decide if it's more or less spiteful than sending text messages. I feel like it's more. I don't know. What do you think? Okay. Yeah, an eight. Okay. Yeah. Okay. How much of an overreaction? Robin Axline: I don't think it's like an overreaction per se. It's just... ⁓ Yeah. Tita Lors: Yeah, I don't think so either. It's above and beyond, I don't think it's an overreaction because she wanted to see this person. She could have bought cheaper tickets for sure. She probably still would have had to drive three hours away if she wanted to go see him. So it's definitely a reaction on the butt and over reactions. I think maybe a little bit less than the previous one. Yeah, yeah, I'm almost thinking of like putting the other one higher. Like, like making Dumas a five and then making this one like a four or three and a half. Okay, four and five. Okay, are you ready for it? Okay, awesome. Okay, so let's go Dumas first for, or which one do you think won? Robin Axline: This is so fun. I can't wait. Tita Lors: I feel like they're very neck and neck. Robin Axline: I don't know, I'm gonna say neck and neck, but maybe the Adam Sandler one. I don't know. Tita Lors: Okay. feel like they're so, they're, pretty neck and neck. I think it's going to be super, super close. Yeah. All right. So Dumas was a 20, like a flat 20. Okay. Yeah. All right. And then Adam Sondler tickets was 18.5. So close. Robin Axline: ⁓ Tita Lors: ⁓ mm-hmm. ⁓ man. Actually, I thought this was going to be the highest score, but still, unpaid child support is... No, wait, not unpaid child support. The real name one. Yeah, it's still beating it. Yeah, I'm shocked, actually. By like 0.5. ⁓ huh. Really close. We might have to like... Yeah. That's... Robin Axline: I mean folks, we're still figuring this out and points are pretty relative so... It's just for fun. Tita Lors: Exactly. Yeah, and I hide the points, so I'm not trying to like skew the results anywhere. I don't see them until the very end, so that's actually super shocking. Yeah. Anyways, this was fun. Robin Axline: Absolutely. No, I had a blast. Tita Lors: Okay, will you close this out? Robin Axline: Alright, so if you, dear listener, have a petty story for us, or if you just want to connect, hit us up on the T-line, or you can email us or DM us on the IG. And please listen, rate, and subscribe. Two thumbs up to the pod. So thanks for listening and we will see you next time. Tita Lors: ⁓ fuck it. ⁓ my bad. That's right. Do it again. Robin Axline: So, stay petty. No, I didn't really... I didn't give you a good enough cue. ⁓ So, as we like to say, stay petty. Bye. Tita Lors: I don't Fuck it. Bye!