Latest / The Christian Homemaking Podcast: Simply Convivial with Mystie Winckler / Why 99% of moms don’t actually need a planner
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker: I have spent more time than I care to admit looking
- 0:04for the perfect planner.
- 0:07One that has enough space, but not too much space.
- 0:11Structured, but still flexible.
- 0:14Pretty, but also very practical
- 0:17Basically, I wanted a planner designed specifically for my life, my brain, my
- 0:25family, and whatever mood I happened to be in on that particular Tuesday.
- 0:30And yes, I have spent countless hours designing my own planner pages
- 0:36trying to attain planner perfection.
- 0:39And you know what?
- 0:41Every hour that I spent comparing layouts was an hour that I
- 0:47was not actually planning.
- 0:49After years of using planners, teaching planning, designing planning methods,
- 0:56and watching other moms struggle with this exact same problem, I've
- 1:00come to a fairly unpopular conclusion
- 1:0599% of moms do not need a better planner.
- 1:10They might not even need a real planner at all.
- 1:13What you really just need is a simple, cheap notebook and a consistent
- 1:19practice of writing things down.
- 1:23So I'm gonna show you why planner shopping often becomes productive
- 1:28procrastination, why messy notes work better than the perfect layout, and
- 1:35three simple planning steps that can all live inside one cheap spiral notebook
- 1:43Or smaller, cheap composition notebook.
- 1:47Or even a little tiny composition notebook.
- 1:52Cheap, small, easy.
- 1:54This is the exact system that has helped me stop treating my planner
- 1:59as the solution, and start using planning as a practice that actually
- 2:05makes a day-to-day difference
- 2:08So if we haven't met, hi, I'm Misty Winkler.
- 2:11I like purple.
- 2:12I'm author of the book Simplified Organization Learn to Love What Must
- 2:16Be Done, and also the book How to Use a Planner Without Wasting Time.
- 2:21Because that's what a lot of our planning really is.
- 2:25A lot of our planning is wishful thinking, or our planning is spent trying
- 2:31to find the perfect planner, where if we fill in all the blanks provided as
- 2:39if it was a worksheet, then we will have some kind of done-for-us system
- 2:44that will suddenly make our life work.
- 2:47I'm sorry, that's not gonna happen.
- 2:49But here is what we can do instead in a cheap and easy notebook.
- 2:55So grab a basket of laundry to fold and let's dig in
- 3:00So here's the deal.
- 3:01A planner is not a magical household management device The best planner
- 3:08is a collection of notes to myself, and that's really all it is.
- 3:14A calendar is a note about where I need to be.
- 3:19A weekly plan is a note about what matters this week and maybe what we're eating.
- 3:25A daily list is a note to myself about what I need to do next.
- 3:31The format can help, but the format is not the practice the problem is that buying
- 3:39a planner feels like we're taking action.
- 3:43It's fun to set up a new planner, and it feels like
- 3:46we're finally getting somewhere.
- 3:48I can spend an entire evening watching planner reviews, comparing the weight of
- 3:55the paper, studying weekly layouts, maybe spending hours designing my own, trying
- 4:02to figure out if I'm a vertical layout person or a horizontal layout person.
- 4:07And at the end of it, I still haven't looked at next week's calendar
- 4:12or decided what we're eating for dinner, maybe even that very day.
- 4:17The search for the perfect planner becomes a way to avoid the
- 4:23imperfect, messy work of making an actual plan for our actual lives
- 4:30Now, I have homeschooled five children, managed a busy home, a
- 4:34couple businesses , written books, we have people over for dinner.
- 4:39I've used plenty of planners, notebooks, index cards, printables, digital
- 4:46apps, miscellaneous scraps of paper.
- 4:50I've pretty much tried it all And the tool that works is the tool that I will
- 4:56actually write things in, look at what I wrote, and adjust and use on the fly
- 5:03If you've been overwhelmed with all the planner options out there, my
- 5:07workshop From Overwhelmed to Organized might be the perfect fit for you.
- 5:14You can go find that at simplyconvivial.com/organized
- 5:18if you need a little help getting out of that overwhelm mode, which sometimes
- 5:23happens when we're shopping for planners.
- 5:25'Cause the thing is, searching for the ideal tool is just
- 5:32delaying the uncomfortable work of actually committing to a plan.
- 5:39A new planner creates a rush of hope and possibility.
- 5:44It directs us and tells us what to do.
- 5:46Just fill in the blanks.
- 5:48Write three things that you're grateful for here.
- 5:52Track how much you're sleeping or drinking water.
- 5:56The pages are clean.
- 5:58It feels so full of potential But what happens when you
- 6:03have to cross something out?
- 6:05When an appointment gets moved or canceled?
- 6:07When you misspell a word or your pen smears ink?
- 6:12When you have to rewrite tasks again and again
- 6:16So often what I'm trying for in achieving the perfect planner is a visual creation
- 6:24of what I wish my life was like.
- 6:27But once the planner starts reflecting what I'm really like and what my life
- 6:31is really like, I wanna ditch it.
- 6:35But that is exactly the moment I need to keep it and stick with it and appreciate
- 6:42it for the reality check that it is.
- 6:45What planner you use feels like a significant decision, but it really isn't.
- 6:52The significant decision is what's for dinner tonight What needs to happen
- 6:58in my home for me to run my home well?
- 7:02The planner is only the place where we write those real decisions down so that in
- 7:08the moment when we need to make the choice and do the action we don't have to start
- 7:12from scratch and rethink those on the fly because we know that's not gonna happen
- 7:18What I have found for myself and so many other women in our
- 7:22community, Convivial Circle,
- 7:24where we have hundreds of women committed to excelling at their homemaking and
- 7:31doing life cheerfully I have seen again and again that the pretty planner
- 7:37is more of a hindrance than a help because we want it to stay pretty.
- 7:43We don't want it to have any misspelled words or the wrong color or crossed out
- 7:50tasks or scribbles from our children.
- 7:54But a cheap notebook eliminates that concern
- 7:59There is nothing expensive or high stakes about a cheap spiral notebook
- 8:07And sometimes the fill in the box method of planning that a pre-designed planner
- 8:14gives you is wishful thinking on paper that is actually getting in the way
- 8:21of you engaging with your real life.
- 8:23And so what you do with a spiral notebook instead, without any fill
- 8:28in the blank options that make planning feel like homework, we're
- 8:32just writing down what we need.
- 8:35Write down the next list that is popping into your head right now.
- 8:39Get it down.
- 8:41If you don't need it, that's fine, just turn the page
- 8:44tear out the page if it's bothering you
- 8:46Did your pen run out of ink or did your toddler spill milk on it?
- 8:52Oh, well, grab another one.
- 8:55They're 25 cents at the back to school supply sale.
- 8:58Like, no problem.
- 9:00Low stakes.
- 9:02It can fit in your messy real life.
- 9:07And a workable plan is actually just your notes to self, the things that
- 9:13you are thinking in your brain that you need to get down on paper so that
- 9:17you can move forward with decisions you have pre-made, with those notes
- 9:22to self, the meal plan for the week.
- 9:26It doesn't have to be in a calendar format.
- 9:28It can be a list in a notebook.
- 9:31I first learned about using a notebook as a planner back when I was homeschooling
- 9:38all five of my kids, and life was so busy.
- 9:42And a new family moved to town and started attending our church and our playgroup.
- 9:48They moved from across the country With five small children.
- 9:53And what I instantly noticed at our playgroup was that this mom
- 9:57carried a cheap spiral notebook with her wherever she went.
- 10:02And if someone mentioned their favorite park or what dentist they
- 10:06used or any kind of new piece of information that she wanted to
- 10:11remember, she just wrote it down.
- 10:13And she just had pages and pages of notes and phone numbers and names and ideas and
- 10:21lists of things to buy and unpack and do.
- 10:25And she just kinda casually flipped through it, looked at what she
- 10:28had written down, crossed things off here or there, and made the
- 10:32next note to herself as she went.
- 10:35It didn't need categorization.
- 10:38It didn't need organization in a kind of aesthetic sense where if
- 10:43anyone happened to open up any page, they would be impressed.
- 10:48No, she was actually organized.
- 10:51Not organized as a kind of aesthetic attainment, but actually keeping
- 10:57information where she could find it, where she looked at it and kept
- 11:02what she needed and crossed out what she didn't and kept moving.
- 11:06That's real organization.
- 11:09It doesn't have to be overcomplicated, And we shouldn't
- 11:12be planning to impress others.
- 11:16We should be planning to just manage our own real life better
- 11:21And you might do that better if you used a cheap, basic notebook.
- 11:27Maybe you say, "Well, a spiral notebook is too big for my purse."
- 11:32Well, fine.
- 11:33Get a tiny little composition notebook.
- 11:35Like, look how small that is.
- 11:37But it's just paper.
- 11:40Yours doesn't even have to be purple.
- 11:43But mine will be
- 11:44You can use these without feeling the pressure to keep it perfect or pretty.
- 11:50You can have different pens, whatever pen or pencil is on hand, because you're
- 11:55not going for an aesthetic creation.
- 11:58It's not a creativity outlet.
- 12:01It's not a scrapbook page.
- 12:03It's an actual tool for remembering what you need to
- 12:06remember when you need to know it.
- 12:08And so you write things down, and you flip through and look at what you wrote down.
- 12:12That's what a planner really is.
- 12:14That's what an effective working planner really is.
- 12:19So whatever planner you have, is it working?
- 12:22That is, is it holding the information that you need, and is it there for
- 12:26you to look at when you need it?
- 12:29What's getting in the way of you either writing down what you need
- 12:33to know or then looking at it after you have it written down?
- 12:38Maybe your planner needs a better home.
- 12:40Maybe your planner needs some kind of pen attachment so that it's always handy.
- 12:46Maybe you need to remove all those blanks and boxes and templates
- 12:52from your planner and just go with straight normal blank paper
- 12:56writing things down and looking at it is what will make your planner finally work
- 13:02And you know, just writing things down and then looking at it is why
- 13:07the daily card works so well for me and for the hundreds, maybe even at
- 13:13this point thousands of other ladies who have tried it in my community.
- 13:18It's not impressive.
- 13:19It's not necessarily beautiful, and it's not a complete life management system.
- 13:25It's the kind of thing you can't overthink.
- 13:28It's just a small place where I write down the three priorities for each day
- 13:34That's the practice that helps me move from feeling overwhelmed with all that
- 13:40there is to actually recognizing that organization is writing things down,
- 13:45looking at them, and doing something.
- 13:48We need that bias toward action.
- 13:51And I explain all about this in my free training, From Overwhelmed to
- 13:56Organized, which you can find in the episode description, or you can go
- 14:00to simplyconvivial.com/organized,
- 14:03simplyconvivial.com/organized
- 14:05And watch the free training because it is possible for you to not feel overwhelmed
- 14:11no matter how long your to-do list is.
- 14:14You can have a full, busy, intense life that you actually love and enjoy doing.
- 14:22Overwhelm is optional.
- 14:24Let me show you how to step out of overwhelm and into organized
- 14:29mode with this free training.
- 14:31I'll see you there, I will help you repent rejoice, repeat