Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Why Do Narcissists Change Jobs Or Get Fired So Much?
Transcript
- 0:00So why do narcissists get fired so dango much?
- 0:04Why do they change jobs so much? Like why is job consistency so
- 0:11like uncommon with narcissistic people?
- 0:14Now I'm not saying that there are not narcissists out there
- 0:16that don't have jobs for a very long time.
- 0:18Like just just in place, right? There's the same factory, same
- 0:22office, same whatever forever, right?
- 0:24But you hear a lot of stories about narcissists.
- 0:27They keep getting fired a lot. They can't hold down a job.
- 0:29They're all always changing career paths or have new dreams
- 0:33and goals and things like that. So that's what we talked about
- 0:35today, y'all, literally, that's what we breaking down today.
- 0:38If you're new here, Lee Hammock, diagnosed narcissist, give you
- 0:41the inner look at the mind of a narcissist.
- 0:44And yes, we just hit the gym so and yes, we got to get our
- 0:47recordings out for today. So yes, narcissistic people,
- 0:51y'all hate authority figures. I, I think that goes without
- 0:54saying. I think that goes without
- 0:56saying. I just think that most people
- 0:57would understand that narcissists hate hate authority
- 1:03figures. They really do like we really
- 1:05do. I hate when people are above me
- 1:06in any kind of circumstances, right?
- 1:08Especially in the workplace. So if because you know, most
- 1:13narcissists have the illusions of grandeur and they have
- 1:15problems with authority and taking orders and having people
- 1:18feel like they're above them. So in the workplace, if I have a
- 1:21boss or somebody else that I feel like I'm above, if I if I
- 1:26feel like I'm entitled to more than what I've got, I've got
- 1:29right now, then yes, I'm going to typically call, make some
- 1:34waves in their workplace and probably see myself out or
- 1:39somebody's going to see me out of there.
- 1:40Right. This happens to so many
- 1:44narcissistic people. I promise you it does.
- 1:46Like when you're dealing with the narcissist, Like I hear so
- 1:50many stories when I'm doing my one on ones over zoom at
- 1:52mentalillness.net. The of people saying that
- 1:55narcissistic partner has had like they've been the other for
- 1:5810 years. They've had 35 jobs, Will Lee or
- 2:02or they had one job and they just haven't worked it in fair.
- 2:05They got one job fired and just refused to work.
- 2:07Again. I've heard this story countless
- 2:09times, and not just from women. I've heard this or from men as
- 2:12well. So it's just like, is this is
- 2:13kind of, you know, the genders kind of throw out the window
- 2:16right here. But because narcissistic people
- 2:18hate having authority figures, we just do.
- 2:21Yeah. We cannot stand when there's
- 2:23somebody above us, so we tend to act out.
- 2:26We feel, we always feel like we deserve more, like we are
- 2:30destined for more. So the fact that I'm, I feel
- 2:33like I'm destined for more should like I'm here in his
- 2:36workplace or whatever. If, especially if it's a job
- 2:39that I feel like it's beneath me, then hell yeah, I'm going to
- 2:42act up. Hell yeah, I'm going to act out.
- 2:44Hell yeah. I'm probably going to get fired
- 2:46or quit very soon because I think I'm destined for more.
- 2:52And then you get a look, if you're the partner or the parent
- 2:56or whoever is dealing with this narcissist, right, or this
- 2:58narcissistic person, if you are the partner or somebody close to
- 3:01them when they, when they get fired, sometimes they're going
- 3:05to expect you to always support them no matter what.
- 3:08I had to quit that job today, babe.
- 3:10Oh my God, why? Because like I'm, I'm, it's just
- 3:14not, it's just not for me. I feel like I'm destined for
- 3:16more. I have to do more.
- 3:18I I need to do more. I I I I I deserve better than
- 3:22that. OK.
- 3:23But you, I'm not saying anything about you.
- 3:26You're like, OK, what? What were you going to say?
- 3:28I just feel like you dropped out of high school.
- 3:32You didn't go get your GEDGED by choice.
- 3:35All these are choices. You say you're too smart for
- 3:38high school, you're too smart for college, you're too smart
- 3:40for the GED now you're too good for the job.
- 3:42I'm just saying he. Said you don't believe in me.
- 3:44You don't even believe me. See, that's why I've been
- 3:45cheating on you. That's why me put my hands on
- 3:47you. Because you don't believe me.
- 3:48I need somebody who believes in me.
- 3:52And see, you see how stupid that sounds are all right there.
- 3:55There's a lot of narcissists and this is not me picking up
- 3:57anybody who dropped out of high school or because some people
- 3:59when they were y'all were younger, you had to drop out of
- 4:02high school and stuff like that to work.
- 4:04I know that times are different. IA 100% understand that right
- 4:07had to help all the fountain. This is not me chastising y'all
- 4:09because y'all have worked hard and you're doing what you need
- 4:11to do narcissist. The people, on the other hand,
- 4:13feel like they they are qualified for more even though
- 4:15they have intentionally not put the work in.
- 4:18You say, so if I have a, if I'm a narcissist and I have a job,
- 4:21if I work in the workplace, then I'm always going to feel like
- 4:23I'm destined for more like y'all.
- 4:25Even like my last, I would say my last real job, I still work
- 4:30now. My last warehouse job before I
- 4:33started doing it, before I became a real estate agent, I
- 4:35worked at Harris Teeter Distribution Center in
- 4:37Greensboro, NC. I've worked there for like 6 1/2
- 4:40years. While I was there, I always felt
- 4:44like I had, I had bosses. They were telling me what to do
- 4:47and I was in college. I'm like, what the hell?
- 4:49I'm like how y'all who who are y'all to tell me what to do and
- 4:52then when I graduated college, it got way worse when I got my
- 4:55when I got my degree from ANTNTANT algebra, I got my
- 4:59industrial engineering degree. I just feel like I was on top of
- 5:02the world. I like what the hell I'm above
- 5:04all y'all ain't my little 10 more do My hubris was crazy.
- 5:06My ego was just insanely crazy. It really was y'all.
- 5:13I still been with that shout out to Harris heated that it when I
- 5:15graduated. They did put my name on like a
- 5:16little board as like recent graduates, Demon Hammock.
- 5:19They're kind of agricultural and technical State University
- 5:22industrial engineering. I was like, I love this.
- 5:25I appreciate shout out to y'all who did that for me.
- 5:26Y'all see I'm smiling now. I'm grateful for that.
- 5:29I really am. But it doesn't take the way to
- 5:32ego bring my ego back, right. It doesn't take the way the fact
- 5:36that I feel like I was always destined for more and deserve
- 5:38more. Yeah, it's a damn bug in here
- 5:41flying around that's attracted to my my lights.
- 5:44And it's just that's why you see my eyes do that right there.
- 5:46I thought it was going to try to fly at me, like attack me.
- 5:48I'm just recording. I'm talking about you little
- 5:50narcissistic bug. I'm talking about narcissists
- 5:52here and you trying to fly and distract me.
- 5:54Are you a narcissist bug? But yeah, this super shout out
- 6:02to Harris Teeter. But there are.
- 6:04So if you're dealing with a narcissist that keeps doing this
- 6:06job, I'm not saying they're ever going to stop doing it, right?
- 6:10And the crazy thing about it is you get the narcissist who gets
- 6:13fired a lot or just changes job so much that tries to be an
- 6:16entrepreneur, but they're not good at that either.
- 6:19They actually need the discipline and the structure of
- 6:21a job, but they don't they don't want that because they feel like
- 6:24they're more entitled and their egos are so big.
- 6:26So they feel like they're going to be an entrepreneur where they
- 6:28don't have any good ideas or the drive or the discipline to be an
- 6:31entrepreneur. So that that inevitably drags
- 6:34everybody else in the household or everybody else around me.
- 6:38It drags us down, right? It drags everybody else down.
- 6:42You feel everybody else is going to feel it, right?
- 6:45If I'm feeling that certain type of way, everybody else is going
- 6:48to feel that certain type of way as well.
- 6:50Because how dare you get to feel good when I feel bad?
- 6:53How dare you get, you get to do some things, but I don't get to
- 6:56do those things. You see how the mind works on an
- 6:58artist. It's just like they always
- 7:00expect your support or whatever, no matter what the hell they do.
- 7:03And this can be draining you. I promise you this can be
- 7:05draining and this can go like there.
- 7:08There's a small caveat in here as well.
- 7:10This could go for the narcissistic person that had a
- 7:14good job, lost a job, but then refuses to go take a job in
- 7:19another field or something. They feel like it's beneath
- 7:21them. I've heard those stories of my
- 7:23one of my Zoom calls as well. Got to my zoom calls.
- 7:25Mental illness.net. A lady told me a story one time
- 7:28before where she said her husband like was an account
- 7:32executive and the company shut down.
- 7:35And this was 14 years ago. He got he's like laid out 14
- 7:39years ago. He's been job hunting ever since
- 7:41then. So he's been chilling for 14
- 7:43years while she had to pick up another job.
- 7:45And then he just got comfortable.
- 7:47He's like, well, I'm looking for a job in the same field.
- 7:49Nobody wants to hire me. They're not there's not a lot of
- 7:51jobs out there, right? There's not a lot of jobs out
- 7:54there for me. So he been chilling for 14
- 7:56years. He had job offers, but he kept
- 7:57denying them because he felt like they were beneath him.
- 7:59So he'd been chilling for 14 years living off his wife,
- 8:01right? And she's frustrated.
- 8:03I think she's just, she's getting ready to file for
- 8:05divorce. But guess what?
- 8:07This is what narcissistic people do.
- 8:09Because he hasn't worked in 14 years and she has two jobs with
- 8:12for a pretty decent pretty decent income, he's going to
- 8:15take her for alimony. He been bumming for 14 years,
- 8:19refused to get another job. And because he he's unemployed
- 8:22for 14 years, he's going to hit her in the head for alimony.
- 8:24He's like, you leave me, I'm going to get alimony.
- 8:26I already talked to an attorney. I took your money, wouldn't hire
- 8:29an attorney. An attorney said I'm qualified
- 8:31for this much alimony and you can't just quit one of your jobs
- 8:34because of that. So now she has to keep working 2
- 8:38jobs to cover the household while he sits on his ass and now
- 8:41he's just refusing to get a job because if he gets a job he
- 8:43won't qualify for alimony no more.
- 8:44Which is evil I'm telling you. So if you're in a situation with
- 8:48a narcissist who refuses to find a job and you're and you're
- 8:51working your ass off and they just keep getting fired over and
- 8:54over again, they possibility to check your state laws because
- 8:57that possibility could exist for you as well.
- 8:59Well, your partner refuses to work and then you try to leave
- 9:02them and then you have to pay them alimony.
- 9:05Y'all been, they've been the previous couple was married for
- 9:07a long time. So she's going to have to pay
- 9:09alimony for years, years. You know, I don't think alimony
- 9:13is forever in the state that she was in.
- 9:14It's determined by how long y'all married.
- 9:16So she used to, I think she's at 5 to 10 years or something like
- 9:19that of alimony, which is a lot of her income, which you see
- 9:23what I'm saying? It's just it's cheaper to keep
- 9:24him. So now she feels like she's
- 9:26trapped in the marriage she doesn't want to be in.
- 9:28And he he's getting lazy and stinking and sitting on the
- 9:30couch all the time. So the narcissist, the people
- 9:33will absolutely take advantage of you.
- 9:35So I'm just saying before it gets out of hand, y'all, this is
- 9:38something for y'all. That's why I told you share
- 9:39their story with y'all. Because before it gets out of
- 9:41hand, if you're in a similar situation, you might want to be
- 9:44preparing for that because they will hit you in the head for
- 9:47alimony. Even as a man sitting on a
- 9:48couch, woman, they will hit you in the head for alimony.
- 9:50The previous story I told you was a man.
- 9:52He just refused. He was an account executive.
- 9:54He has a good education. He just refused to get another
- 9:57job because he felt like everything's beneath him.
- 9:59And then he just got lazy as hell, right?
- 10:01So they can apply for them as well.
- 10:03There's a lot of narcissists that get fired and a lot of
- 10:05narcissists that quit. But there are some narcissists
- 10:07that follow into that category where they feel like they will
- 10:09not, will not accept a job that they feel like it's beneath
- 10:12them. And no matter how long.
- 10:14And he just, I think he just used it as a tool to just sit on
- 10:16a sit his stinking ass on the couch all the time.
- 10:18He wasn't like I said, he wasn't even a stay at home dad.
- 10:20Like he wasn't taking care of the kids.
- 10:22Like she was doing it. Like, yeah, she was doing
- 10:23everything. I was just I felt bad for her.
- 10:24I was like, he's been going for 14 years with his big stinking
- 10:27ass been sitting on the couch hasn't helped at all with it
- 10:30doesn't help. Doesn't even go pick up the
- 10:31kids. So she had to get this is she
- 10:33had to get off of her first job, go pick the kids up from school
- 10:37because they live. They didn't live on a bus route
- 10:39and he dropped the kids off at home and then go to her second
- 10:41job while he's his stinking ass and stayed at home doing
- 10:44nothing. He's still doing it now.
- 10:46I hope she found a way around that to get divorced because
- 10:48that's here. That's, that's this educated bum
- 10:51this, this is somebody who's choosing to be a bum in that
- 10:55situation right there in that scenario.
- 10:56So yeah, that that type of stuff happens.
- 10:59So some nurses, they just have this superiority complex where
- 11:01they just feel like they're above jobs, they're above
- 11:04working at a job, they're above their bosses, they're above, you
- 11:08know, their circumstances, even though they haven't done
- 11:11anything to qualify for seriously, they haven't done
- 11:14anything to qualify for that type of stuff or for anything,
- 11:17you know, scenarios. They just want, they want you to
- 11:19convince you that they have. Yeah, it's a wild thing.
- 11:22Yo. So I said it all to say this
- 11:25y'all to get this point right here.
- 11:27Protect yourself, protect your assets.
- 11:29You know what I mean? I'm not telling y'all to be
- 11:30manipulative and hide your assets in the offshore account
- 11:32if you're dealing with the narcissist, but sometimes you
- 11:34might have to, right? You just want to protect
- 11:36yourself because like they that Lady I talked about a few
- 11:38minutes ago, she was crying talking to me because now she
- 11:41has because she's considering staying in a toxic relationship
- 11:44because you got to pay him to leave.
- 11:45It's kind of like you got paid him pay him to go away because
- 11:48he's a bum, you know? Anyways, y'all probably this
- 11:52video about you some clarity, hope about you some peace.
- 11:54If you did hit the subscribe button.
- 11:56Also, everything about me, my coaching, my courses, everything
- 11:59is available at mentalillness.net.
- 12:00If you're watching this on YouTube, click one of the boxes
- 12:03on the screen to watch another video on the channel.
- 12:05If you're on my podcast, subscribe to the podcast y'all.
- 12:08Anyways, y'all let's do this. Is that peace?