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BONUS: If You Could Change One Thing · Untraditionally Lala

0:05
Speaker 1: Hello, my loves It's l La Kent. Welcome to the
0:08
Speaker 1: bonus episode Easton.
0:11
Speaker 2: It's just the two of us in year. I'm ready.
0:14
Speaker 1: I love it.
0:15
Speaker 2: Is that home?
0:15
Speaker 1: It feels going so over the weekend, or maybe it
0:19
Speaker 1: was last week. John Krasinski from the Office, right, that's
0:24
Speaker 1: where he got his like big pop off.
0:26
Speaker 2: I want to say, yes, I don't know, but that's
0:28
Speaker 2: where I know him from.
0:29
Speaker 1: Okay, well that same Yeah, he was named the Sexiest
0:33
Speaker 1: Man Alive for twenty twenty four and I didn't realize
0:41
Speaker 1: that this has been going on. The people has been
0:44
Speaker 1: doing the Sexiest Man Alive?
0:45
Speaker 2: Isn't it every year?
0:47
Speaker 1: Every year since nineteen eighty five? Since before I was born.
0:50
Speaker 2: Who was the first one? Do you know?
0:52
Speaker 1: Yes? The first one ever was Mel Gibson And there's
0:57
Speaker 1: a can you Mel, Mel freaking give great?
1:01
Speaker 2: They're all great looking, man. I'm guessing there's a personality
1:04
Speaker 2: involved in the Sexiest Man Alive as well. Well.
1:07
Speaker 1: I feel like this is what Mom always says, Beauty
1:09
Speaker 1: is in the eye of the beholder. There's always someone
1:13
Speaker 1: for someone right like and also there are people where
1:17
Speaker 1: I'm like, physically they may not be my type, but
1:22
Speaker 1: like you start kicking it with them, and then it's
1:24
Speaker 1: the combination of everything where it's like, oh my gosh,
1:27
Speaker 1: this person.
1:28
Speaker 2: You start to shrink and the energies are there and
1:31
Speaker 2: you're like, maybe I do find this person attractive.
1:33
Speaker 1: I don't know. I totally understand the John Krasinski of it,
1:36
Speaker 1: like he does have a sexy factor there, but I think.
1:40
Speaker 2: It's also the way he holds himself. Because I look
1:43
Speaker 2: at him, I'm not like, that's a good looking dude,
1:45
Speaker 2: but when I see him, like the mannerisms about him,
1:48
Speaker 2: I'm like, it's a good looking too.
1:50
Speaker 1: No, he's super hot and like totally not my type
1:52
Speaker 1: at all, But because like I've watched him in interviews
1:55
Speaker 1: and I've watched him on the office, just like the
1:58
Speaker 1: whole thing is just working. But they've had like Patrick
2:01
Speaker 1: Dempsey who used to be make Dreamy on Grey's Anatomy,
2:07
Speaker 1: Michael B. Jordan was one year, Like they really I
2:11
Speaker 1: think they look at the year and that's why it's
2:13
Speaker 1: towards the end they look at the year and go, Okay,
2:16
Speaker 1: every single thing that this person has done, said, the
2:20
Speaker 1: way they carry themselves, Like it's such an intense process
2:23
Speaker 1: of like naming who the sexiest man alive? Would what
2:27
Speaker 1: will be? Is it?
2:29
Speaker 2: What is it project like projects that they've done throughout
2:33
Speaker 2: the year, or is it.
2:34
Speaker 1: I think it's the whole package.
2:36
Speaker 2: Because also I don't know did John Krasinski get it
2:39
Speaker 2: because the office is coming back on who knows?
2:42
Speaker 1: Everything is for publicity.
2:44
Speaker 2: That's what I was thinking.
2:45
Speaker 1: Very much, So that could be the reason why. But
2:49
Speaker 1: the reason I'm bringing this up is for the bonus episode.
2:52
Speaker 1: The topic today I asked what is one thing that
2:55
Speaker 1: you would change about yourself? And for me, I was
2:58
Speaker 1: thinking less about the physical and more about like how
3:03
Speaker 1: you act in the day to day, things that are
3:06
Speaker 1: maybe a habit, they are inherent, like just things that
3:10
Speaker 1: you wish that you could tweak, but it's really freaking hard.
3:13
Speaker 1: But there was a plethora of people being like, I
3:16
Speaker 1: would change my body type, I would change my nose,
3:19
Speaker 1: And I'm like, Okay, no matter who you are, there's
3:23
Speaker 1: always something physically that you want to fix, always, right. Yeah,
3:27
Speaker 1: Like if you could take a bunch of people's body
3:30
Speaker 1: parts and put together the person, you would look like,
3:34
Speaker 1: we're all going to look very different, because again, not
3:36
Speaker 1: everybody wants the same thing.
3:38
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want a different jawline or neckline. You and
3:41
Speaker 2: me both, Well, yeah, but I don't want the same
3:44
Speaker 2: jaw line that Land wants. No, exactly, very different.
3:48
Speaker 1: Everybody would look very different because everyone wants something different, right.
3:51
Speaker 2: But that's the thing that's crazy, is like I'll look
3:53
Speaker 2: at Land and I'm like, yeah, you got a jawlne Dude,
3:55
Speaker 2: I'm jealous, And He's like, no, I'm jealous.
3:58
Speaker 1: Of this guy, right Exactly, You're just.
4:00
Speaker 2: Jealous of the one thing you don't have. And guess what,
4:03
Speaker 2: careful what you wish for?
4:04
Speaker 1: Because what does Eminem's eight?
4:06
Speaker 2: Because you careful what you wish for, because you just
4:10
Speaker 2: might get it, and if you get it, you might
4:12
Speaker 2: not know just.
4:13
Speaker 1: What to do with it, right, Like for those who
4:16
Speaker 1: wish they had giant dicks and then suddenly they have
4:19
Speaker 1: a tripod, they can't even put pants on.
4:21
Speaker 2: You know, your paycheck goes to duct tape taking that
4:25
Speaker 2: thing down.
4:26
Speaker 1: Oh god, Okay, So I asked our friends on the podcast.
4:30
Speaker 2: Friends mostly Go Appearance.
4:33
Speaker 1: No, there were a lot of appearance writings, but actually
4:37
Speaker 1: a lot of them were super relatable. And so I
4:40
Speaker 1: want to ask you easton what is one thing you
4:44
Speaker 1: could say multiple if you wanted to that you wish
4:46
Speaker 1: you could change about yourself.
4:48
Speaker 2: My mental okay, my thought process.
4:51
Speaker 1: Like what is your thought process that you would want
4:53
Speaker 1: to reach?
4:53
Speaker 2: Pay cushions first, A lot of people don't think that.
4:56
Speaker 2: I think of like, if I'm going to do this,
4:59
Speaker 2: what are the repercussions? And as I'm thinking, and there
5:02
Speaker 2: is like obviously I do like that, but like I overthink,
5:07
Speaker 2: like a post or a twenty four hour story, people
5:10
Speaker 2: just let them fly if I post it, I'm like,
5:12
Speaker 2: but what if somebody looks at it like this or
5:14
Speaker 2: this or this, and then it's so many repercussions that
5:17
Speaker 2: I just don't post, Okay. So I wish I could
5:20
Speaker 2: change my mindset of just not caring, okay, because I care.
5:25
Speaker 1: A lot of people said this, like I wish I
5:28
Speaker 1: didn't care, right, but I do. You were saying in
5:31
Speaker 1: the car that, like, you are scared of failure, so
5:34
Speaker 1: it prevents you from having, like from trying.
5:38
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what I was. It's crazy how everybody is
5:41
Speaker 2: the same and they're afraid to try and afraid to
5:45
Speaker 2: put themselves out there for failure in the other people's
5:49
Speaker 2: eyes because everybody is so judgmental. So it's like how
5:54
Speaker 2: you want to do the same, So why are you
5:56
Speaker 2: judgmental towards other people because now you are afraid to
5:59
Speaker 2: do what you want to do because of your judgment
6:02
Speaker 2: towards people doing that.
6:03
Speaker 1: Right, It's such a it's such an walk and a
6:06
Speaker 1: hard spot. That's exactly what it is. And we all
6:08
Speaker 1: sit here and we want the same thing, and it's like,
6:11
Speaker 1: but people are afraid to put themselves out there because
6:14
Speaker 1: there's a lot of mean people who are who really
6:17
Speaker 1: have a big set of ovaries behind their keyboard, like.
6:22
Speaker 2: Josh Richards and like those kids that were starting like
6:25
Speaker 2: they were in high school getting made fun of all
6:29
Speaker 2: of this. I mean, they're huge now, but they were
6:30
Speaker 2: making their little videos. Every other kid probably wishes they
6:34
Speaker 2: were doing what all those kids were doing, like Josh
6:37
Speaker 2: Richards because they are now where they are, But like that,
6:40
Speaker 2: I wish I was the Josh Richards mindset.
6:42
Speaker 1: Of where you just didn't care, silence the noise, yeah,
6:45
Speaker 1: and just post what you want. That's that is a
6:48
Speaker 1: hard thing to conquer though, Like I think even I
6:52
Speaker 1: go through these moments of like if I say yes
6:54
Speaker 1: to this, well, people think that I said yes because
6:57
Speaker 1: of X Y and z but do you want to
7:00
Speaker 1: do it? Well, yeah, I do want to do it,
7:01
Speaker 1: So then do it, I know, but what will people think?
7:03
Speaker 2: And and so by the time I'm done, I'm like,
7:05
Speaker 2: I'm just exhausted.
7:07
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, I need a nap.
7:10
Speaker 2: Where's a blanket you lie down?
7:13
Speaker 1: No, it does take me out. And so often people say, like,
7:17
Speaker 1: I love you, where do you get your confidence? You
7:20
Speaker 1: don't give a fuck? And I'm like, to the outside world,
7:22
Speaker 1: I come across that way, but behind closed doors, when
7:26
Speaker 1: I'm in my safe space, like it is mental torture.
7:29
Speaker 2: My brain is in a fight with itself. Unchstantley like
7:33
Speaker 2: just fighting, and I'm like.
7:34
Speaker 1: Just shuwn up up the same I'm saying.
7:37
Speaker 2: I'm like, stop, I'm on like the fucking seater. Sorry,
7:42
Speaker 2: and I'm talking to my doctor.
7:46
Speaker 1: But by the way, we're all in it together. I'm like,
7:49
Speaker 1: we're all we all want the same thing. Why are
7:51
Speaker 1: we kicking the.
7:52
Speaker 2: Shit out of each other? You're afraid to do it,
7:55
Speaker 2: so you shit on the person doing it. That's what
7:58
Speaker 2: it is.
7:58
Speaker 1: Oh my god. It's also yes, And all.
8:01
Speaker 2: You have to do is just celebrate the guy doing
8:03
Speaker 2: what you want to do and if you started doing it,
8:05
Speaker 2: they'll celebrate you. But I'm just hating the person doing
8:07
Speaker 2: what you want to do so bad that. Yeah. Right,
8:10
Speaker 2: we're in this boat of anxiety together.
8:12
Speaker 1: Someone's success is not a personal insult.
8:15
Speaker 2: No, no, no, but boy does it feel like it.
8:22
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, it's too much stimulation, is what's happening.
8:27
Speaker 1: So when I was reading the comments that people were writing,
8:31
Speaker 1: oh you told that.
8:31
Speaker 2: Okay, no, no, no.
8:33
Speaker 1: I avoid the comments section at all costs. But the
8:36
Speaker 1: post I put up and people were writing in and
8:38
Speaker 1: every single one I saw, I'm like, oh my god,
8:40
Speaker 1: I relate to this. That is something I do as well.
8:43
Speaker 1: But this one really jumped out of me, just because
8:46
Speaker 1: I like the way it was written, and I think
8:47
Speaker 1: she's funny as fuck. Well maybe it's a girl, yeah, Lily.
8:52
Speaker 1: Lily Dolman's response to be able to control my anger
8:56
Speaker 1: and not get angry over someone breathing the wrong way.
9:00
Speaker 2: Fuse. I know about those.
9:03
Speaker 1: I feel like you have the longest fuse. Ever.
9:07
Speaker 2: That's why I go into my room and lay down
9:08
Speaker 2: a lot.
9:10
Speaker 1: So my case in point for my short few Yesterday,
9:16
Speaker 1: yesterday we're at love Sack and buying a couch.
9:19
Speaker 2: And to interrupt. First, I can't wait till it's set
9:22
Speaker 2: up and my and it.
9:24
Speaker 1: And it could be. How vindicating will it be when
9:26
Speaker 1: that happens for you?
9:27
Speaker 2: No, I don't know.
9:28
Speaker 1: So for those of you who know love Sack, you
9:31
Speaker 1: go in and everything is custom ordered, right, like you
9:34
Speaker 1: can flip the cushions a certain way, the back is
9:37
Speaker 1: a certain way, the arms a kill in between the seats,
9:40
Speaker 1: a lot of options. So Easton comes up with this
9:43
Speaker 1: idea that I told him like, okay, yeah, I don't
9:45
Speaker 1: want that. He like again tries to push me on
9:48
Speaker 1: I don't want that. I probably said I don't want
9:49
Speaker 1: that four times he.
9:50
Speaker 2: Goes getting it.
9:51
Speaker 1: No, but I was getting it. Let's not start again, okay.
9:55
Speaker 1: So he then goes in for the kill, probably the
9:59
Speaker 1: seventh time that he's tried to push it, and I go,
10:02
Speaker 1: I don't want that, Easton, and I yelled in the
10:05
Speaker 1: middle of the store. I was so embarrassed, and I
10:08
Speaker 1: don't know why I hit that level of breaking point.
10:11
Speaker 1: But then Mom reprimanded me and she was like, well,
10:13
Speaker 1: you embarrassed Easton. I was like, well, in return, you
10:15
Speaker 1: embarrassed me, Like it was the perfect store. I was like, oh,
10:20
Speaker 1: very short. Really, I felt really bad.
10:22
Speaker 2: I'm glad that you felt bad. You guys just do
10:25
Speaker 2: it so much.
10:25
Speaker 1: I'm just no, I have a very short fuse, and
10:29
Speaker 1: I think you have mom's patience.
10:32
Speaker 2: No, I do, and I thank God for that. But
10:34
Speaker 2: I really do believe my idea is what is going
10:37
Speaker 2: to happen syndicated.
10:39
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna go stuck on it. I just told
10:41
Speaker 1: you he's still stuck on it. Oh my god, I'm
10:43
Speaker 1: not going to snap. This is where we implement the change.
10:46
Speaker 2: This is where we grow your fuse. That's why I'm
10:49
Speaker 2: doing it. We're going to extend your fuse.
10:51
Speaker 1: I have dad's short FEUs. My dad was like the
10:54
Speaker 1: kindest human alive, but then one thing and he would
10:57
Speaker 1: be like very upset.
10:59
Speaker 2: No, it was scary quiet talking like the tucked lips.
11:04
Speaker 1: Oh, the tucked lips freaking terrifying. But I feel like
11:06
Speaker 1: you develop certain mannerisms or tools when she become a parent.
11:11
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, and you don't listen for the first night
11:13
Speaker 2: and then if it yeah, and then if it works,
11:18
Speaker 2: then you know that's your go to move. Oh. If
11:21
Speaker 2: Dad yelled at me, I was like, all right, he's
11:22
Speaker 2: not too pissed. If he came up to me and
11:24
Speaker 2: he was like, what the fuck are you doing, I
11:25
Speaker 2: was like, my life's ending, I'm not grounded.
11:29
Speaker 1: I want to try that with Ocean.
11:31
Speaker 2: You do it though. That's what you don't understand is
11:33
Speaker 2: you'll walk up to Ocean and go I'm done. It
11:36
Speaker 2: is time forbid and you don't even know you're doing it.
11:40
Speaker 1: Wow, So I just inherited its shenetic. I love that
11:44
Speaker 1: jealousy issues because I always feel like my partner can
11:47
Speaker 1: do better than me. That would be a tough one.
11:51
Speaker 1: I don't know to have, Like I feel like we
11:54
Speaker 1: all have jealousy within us. It's just part of being human,
11:57
Speaker 1: and I feel like you kind of have to quiet
11:59
Speaker 1: that beast because again, someone else's success is not a
12:02
Speaker 1: personal insult, but to have it with your partner, I
12:06
Speaker 1: think would be really really hard. Yeah, we're like, we've
12:10
Speaker 1: never been in partner That's all I've been. But I
12:16
Speaker 1: feel like I wonder if it's more in same sex
12:20
Speaker 1: couples because it's I think it's hard to be in
12:22
Speaker 1: competition if you're a female and you're in a partnership
12:26
Speaker 1: with a man, because you're never going to have the same.
12:30
Speaker 1: You're really never gonna have the same opportunities, I don't think,
12:35
Speaker 1: as much as we would all love.
12:36
Speaker 2: To see that, Like, it's just like women don't get
12:39
Speaker 2: the same opportunities as I.
12:40
Speaker 1: Just like, I guess unless you're like both actors and
12:43
Speaker 1: going out for the same movie, right, and he books
12:46
Speaker 1: his role but you don't book yours, Like okay, that
12:48
Speaker 1: would be a huge bummer. But to say, like you
12:52
Speaker 1: have jealousy with your partner because they can do better
12:55
Speaker 1: than you, like that.
12:56
Speaker 2: Will only come if you and your partner are in
12:58
Speaker 2: the same field. Okay, yeah, just for me, because like
13:01
Speaker 2: if my wife and if I had a partner and
13:04
Speaker 2: we were in the same and she was like doing
13:05
Speaker 2: way better than me, I would be I don't know
13:08
Speaker 2: if I would be jealous or I would think about
13:11
Speaker 2: myself because I don't really I would be like, am
13:13
Speaker 2: I in the wrong industry for me?
13:16
Speaker 1: You're not? You're Oh yeah, I'm.
13:18
Speaker 2: Built for this? Is she getting everything because she's built
13:20
Speaker 2: for this? Am I on the wrong path? Am I?
13:22
Speaker 2: Joey Tribiani?
13:26
Speaker 1: I mean he was on Days of Our Lives? That's
13:27
Speaker 1: a pretty big get.
13:28
Speaker 2: Yes, Drake for more, eg come on, but no, like
13:31
Speaker 2: that's the thing. Like I wouldn't be like, damn, I'm jealous,
13:33
Speaker 2: I need to do this. I would be thinking, maybe
13:36
Speaker 2: this isn't the line of work that is for me.
13:38
Speaker 1: Well, this person didn't go into like detail. I don't
13:41
Speaker 1: know if they're they're a man with a woman, woman
13:44
Speaker 1: with a man, same couple. But I do think that
13:47
Speaker 1: this one would be extremely difficult because intimacy is added
13:50
Speaker 1: into that. And I'm sorry, once you start having feelings
13:54
Speaker 1: of jealousy, you don't want to fuck that person.
13:58
Speaker 2: See. I don't have jealousy for me. I have self doubt.
14:01
Speaker 2: I don't get jealous of people's success, like I doubt
14:05
Speaker 2: myself of like am I doing something correctly? I'm not
14:08
Speaker 2: like fuck them for being there?
14:10
Speaker 1: No, But that goes back to it's not an insult
14:13
Speaker 1: on you. It doesn't mean you're not doing enough.
14:15
Speaker 2: Well it does, but if I'm not why it's on me,
14:19
Speaker 2: it's not fuck them.
14:20
Speaker 1: So you go back to beating yourself up.
14:22
Speaker 2: Like, Okay, they've done obviously a lot of things, right,
14:25
Speaker 2: I have it. So I don't get jealous, I get
14:29
Speaker 2: more self.
14:30
Speaker 1: Doubt, self doubt. Yeah, that's still a tough one though.
14:34
Speaker 2: Either war, you're in a bad hole caring.
14:36
Speaker 1: Too much about what people think. This goes this I
14:39
Speaker 1: think is most people.
14:39
Speaker 2: No, it's everybody's And that's the thing. If you were
14:42
Speaker 2: nice and made nice comments to people that do what
14:44
Speaker 2: you want to do, it would give you confidence to
14:47
Speaker 2: maybe do it because you're like, oh, well people are
14:49
Speaker 2: nice because I'm nice. You know.
14:52
Speaker 1: It's crazy though. I was talking to land in the
14:54
Speaker 1: other day and Landon is Eastern Front. He's part of
14:59
Speaker 1: the pod he lives, he lives in the back house,
15:02
Speaker 1: and he was talking about how there was a study
15:07
Speaker 1: about do nice guys really finish last? And it was
15:12
Speaker 1: actually split.
15:13
Speaker 2: In the middle give and take.
15:15
Speaker 1: Yes, So nice guys, yes, do finish last. However, the
15:19
Speaker 1: ones that are nice and don't finish last, it's because
15:22
Speaker 1: of who they surround themselves with.
15:24
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's honestly about who. From what I took, it's
15:27
Speaker 2: more about who you surround yourself with and not about
15:30
Speaker 2: how you handle yourself. You are who you are, surround
15:34
Speaker 2: yourself with people that will benefit who you are, who
15:36
Speaker 2: won't take advantage of you.
15:38
Speaker 1: But I think that's where the nice guy comes in.
15:40
Speaker 1: Like I think Dad was a nice guy and people.
15:43
Speaker 1: He allowed people to take advantage of him, and Landon said,
15:46
Speaker 1: you have to surround yourself with the right matchers. So
15:50
Speaker 1: he considers me and Mom one of his matchers. Dad
15:55
Speaker 1: Mom was Dad's matcher. Like, they're willing to go to
15:57
Speaker 1: the match for you and allow you to rise while
16:02
Speaker 1: still be a nice guy, because we don't want anything
16:04
Speaker 1: from you. And that's where it can get very tricky
16:07
Speaker 1: because more times than not, just the way the world
16:10
Speaker 1: is now, people number one don't want to see other
16:13
Speaker 1: people do well. The other thing is there's a lot
16:17
Speaker 1: of leeches in the world where they may be all
16:21
Speaker 1: for you until a certain point hits.
16:23
Speaker 2: Until all for you doesn't benefit them.
16:25
Speaker 1: Yes, or they think like, oh this is kind of nice,
16:30
Speaker 1: I would like to have this, and then it becomes
16:33
Speaker 1: like a scary place. So I think there is a
16:37
Speaker 1: world in which like you can, you can be nice.
16:41
Speaker 1: You can. Nice guys are usually hard on themselves, and
16:44
Speaker 1: a lot of people are saying I'm too hard on myself.
16:46
Speaker 1: I'm too hard on myself.
16:47
Speaker 2: But that's the thing. I'm a nice guy until you're
16:50
Speaker 2: not well. Yes, But also me and land and like
16:54
Speaker 2: if Landing gets taken advantage of yeah, I'll step in
16:57
Speaker 2: for Landing, So you're a matcher for him, but Landing
16:59
Speaker 2: will step been for me because I get taken advantage of. Yes.
17:02
Speaker 2: So that's what me and Lannon are really good at,
17:05
Speaker 2: is like when I see him getting because he can't,
17:08
Speaker 2: I'm thirty thousand above for him. He's thirty one thousand
17:11
Speaker 2: above for me.
17:11
Speaker 1: That's what you need.
17:13
Speaker 2: So every time like he's like, hey, is this weird,
17:15
Speaker 2: and I'm like, yeah, it's a use. Don't do it. Okay,
17:18
Speaker 2: it didn't feel like that to me. And I'll be
17:19
Speaker 2: like how and then we'll discuss it and he's like
17:22
Speaker 2: he is using.
17:23
Speaker 1: We're now seeing all the.
17:25
Speaker 2: Sides, and then I'll do that. I'm like I'm being
17:27
Speaker 2: used and he's like, no, no, it's this and I'm like,
17:30
Speaker 2: I never would have seen that if I didn't ask
17:32
Speaker 2: you totally. So it's like that's yeah, I didn't even
17:35
Speaker 2: put that together until just now.
17:37
Speaker 1: Wow. And this is what the podcast is for, to
17:41
Speaker 1: bring awareness this person. I wish I had more motivation.
17:46
Speaker 1: You said something about this motivation is a hard one
17:50
Speaker 1: because I'm the type of person where I can feel
17:53
Speaker 1: so motivated, but then because I don't allow myself to
17:58
Speaker 1: be like my mom, who looks at life like a
17:59
Speaker 1: herd race, and she always says, like, you don't look
18:02
Speaker 1: at the full track. You look down and as the
18:05
Speaker 1: hurdles come, you jump, because if you don't, you're going
18:07
Speaker 1: to fall, and in my case, become like one of
18:10
Speaker 1: those goats who stares quickly or scares quickly and then
18:13
Speaker 1: tips over. That's how I become very overwhelmed when I
18:17
Speaker 1: think about, Okay, I have motivation, here are the steps
18:21
Speaker 1: I need to take to get to where I want
18:23
Speaker 1: to be, And then all of a sudden, I'm like,
18:25
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm hyperventilating. All the logistics are coming
18:28
Speaker 1: to a head, and I'm gonna pass out.
18:30
Speaker 2: Motivation though, for me, I feel like you have to
18:34
Speaker 2: have a reward at the end of the motivation, like
18:36
Speaker 2: you have motivation at the beginning of the game, to
18:39
Speaker 2: win the game at the end. It's hard to stay
18:41
Speaker 2: motivated in life when all you do is take a
18:43
Speaker 2: fucking l Yes, you know, because I've been in that boat.
18:46
Speaker 2: You Right when you get ahead, even like I'll just
18:50
Speaker 2: use a bank account. Right when you feel like you're
18:52
Speaker 2: getting ahead, you're like, okay, I got some shit something
18:54
Speaker 2: fucking hits and you're like.
18:56
Speaker 1: Right, the car breaks, you got it down two thousand dollars.
18:59
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was ambitious today, I was I had it
19:02
Speaker 2: all and now this just shit on it? And how
19:05
Speaker 2: long can I keep being motivated motivated with just not
19:12
Speaker 2: getting something out of it at the end. You're so right,
19:16
Speaker 2: because yeah, like are you motivated today? Yeah? I have this,
19:20
Speaker 2: this and this. Everything comes with like at the end
19:22
Speaker 2: of the day, you gotta win or you got something
19:25
Speaker 2: out of it. It's very hard for me when I
19:27
Speaker 2: was big, like living in Utah, to stay motivated every
19:31
Speaker 2: day when there wasn't It was like a carrot in
19:33
Speaker 2: front of my head. I was motivated, but I was
19:36
Speaker 2: never fucking getting it right. So you're like a dog. Yeah,
19:39
Speaker 2: So sometimes you just lay down with the carrot in
19:40
Speaker 2: front of your face and just say fuck it, I'm
19:42
Speaker 2: going to bed, right. So that's what I feel like,
19:46
Speaker 2: to stay motivated. Pick something that you can have a
19:48
Speaker 2: goal to get as well as doing motivation in life.
19:52
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that Easton. Yeah, Wow, what a great
19:55
Speaker 1: fucking thing to bring up. I didn't even think about
19:57
Speaker 1: taking the l I love this because I have so
20:01
Speaker 1: many friends that are like this. I have so many
20:03
Speaker 1: friends that are like this. I am late to everything
20:08
Speaker 1: in my life, work, appointments, events, send help, no trying face.
20:14
Speaker 2: Just be okay with being late. I'm not kidding you.
20:18
Speaker 2: I've finally been okay, but I'm like, fucking I'm late.
20:20
Speaker 2: I don't care.
20:21
Speaker 1: No, if you're late to a reservation, there's only a
20:24
Speaker 1: fifteen minute grace period. If you're late.
20:26
Speaker 2: To fuck it, they'll get you in.
20:30
Speaker 1: Doctor's appointments that if you make a month in advance
20:33
Speaker 1: and you missed the grace window.
20:34
Speaker 2: There was a car accident. Sorry, couldn't get heard in time.
20:37
Speaker 1: Oh so Easton implements, the lying, white.
20:40
Speaker 2: Lie there was an accident somewhere.
20:41
Speaker 1: See, I'm too afraid because every time I blame something.
20:44
Speaker 1: If I'm like late to something and I'm like, I'm
20:46
Speaker 1: so sorry, I'm sick. Literally two days later I get
20:50
Speaker 1: way sick.
20:51
Speaker 2: Is this in my life style? Just white lying and just.
20:54
Speaker 1: My kar Is is that what it is? No?
20:56
Speaker 2: I refuse all right, I'll start just canceling and being honest,
21:00
Speaker 2: don't want to go.
21:01
Speaker 1: This is what I think. If you know that you
21:04
Speaker 1: have an appointment at like ten am, get there at
21:08
Speaker 1: line instead, tell yourself that appointment is at nine am,
21:12
Speaker 1: and put that in the forefront of your mind nine am,
21:15
Speaker 1: nine am, nine am. That way you have an hour
21:18
Speaker 1: grace period.
21:19
Speaker 2: Also, if you will really are late to everything, make
21:21
Speaker 2: it quick. There's a Google calendar that you can put
21:23
Speaker 2: everything in with a drive time, so it'll let you
21:26
Speaker 2: know where you need to leave to be on time.
21:28
Speaker 1: Boom boom, it'll technology.
21:30
Speaker 2: Man, like your appointment, d leave right now to make
21:35
Speaker 2: it on time.
21:36
Speaker 1: No, it needs to say like leave in thirty minutes
21:39
Speaker 1: or something, because right now it's like, oh no. Sins.
21:43
Speaker 1: Limbs are like a real issue. You're constantly banging them around.
21:49
Speaker 1: The ability to think through my words in certain situations,
21:52
Speaker 1: I always regret my delivery. Oh my god, I saw it.
21:56
Speaker 1: I am great at delivering the of intentions covered in shit.
22:02
Speaker 1: Hope you're okay with digging through ship, but once you
22:05
Speaker 1: dig through and hit the middle, you're gonna find gold.
22:10
Speaker 2: Oh god, I can't relate with any of this. You're
22:13
Speaker 2: very You're like a beef Wellington. What that just ship
22:18
Speaker 2: looks like ship, but it means well, looks like shit,
22:21
Speaker 2: tastes great. Just a beef Wellington, you are. I can't
22:28
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
22:29
Speaker 1: If I ever become like an artist, like a rapper,
22:34
Speaker 1: a singer.
22:35
Speaker 2: You're going by Beef Wellington. What strip club are you
22:41
Speaker 2: going to? I don't know. I'm just going to fucking
22:43
Speaker 2: see Beef Wellington. I would assume her vagina was the
22:47
Speaker 2: one wrapped around the pole with the name Beef Wellington.
22:51
Speaker 2: I'm just thinking of the dirtiest town with like the
22:53
Speaker 2: dirtiest strip. I cannot breath Beef Wellington. RB's melt is
23:00
Speaker 2: the other girl's na shut up?
23:02
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this took a turn.
23:05
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, half off every day for sure.
23:08
Speaker 1: Oh my hell, and we're back, you Ston, you'll relate
23:12
Speaker 1: to this one. My anxiety, legit, get anxiety over nothing,
23:16
Speaker 1: over things I make up in my head.
23:18
Speaker 2: Oh the amount of gosh.
23:20
Speaker 1: You talked about this on the regular episode where I
23:24
Speaker 1: was like staring at something. The TV was on and
23:28
Speaker 1: I was holding Sosa and I was just blank staring.
23:30
Speaker 1: Easton looks over and says he's like building his leg.
23:34
Speaker 1: I was like singing, and he looks over and he's like, bitch,
23:36
Speaker 1: whatever you're thinking about stop, And I was like, wow,
23:38
Speaker 1: you know me so well? How do you know I
23:41
Speaker 1: was thinking about something dark. And the thing is, I
23:44
Speaker 1: still have high thoughts even though I don't smoke weed.
23:47
Speaker 1: There was a time that I was like, I look
23:49
Speaker 1: at the clock ten o'clock.
23:50
Speaker 2: Right, shut up.
23:52
Speaker 1: I was a half of unisombdeep, but I like looked
23:55
Speaker 1: at the clock. I was stoned out of my fucking mind.
23:57
Speaker 1: It was ten, okay, ten pm. And I just remember
24:01
Speaker 1: like thinking about a million things. And I looked at
24:04
Speaker 1: the clock and it was still ten. And I had
24:07
Speaker 1: had many, many thoughts. So what happens is one single
24:13
Speaker 1: thought parlays into another, and then we've gone down the
24:17
Speaker 1: rabbit's hole. Call me Alice in Wonderland. And then I
24:20
Speaker 1: have to bring God into the mix and pray. I'm like, please, God,
24:24
Speaker 1: calm me down, take these stressors. I go into my
24:29
Speaker 1: AA prayer and I'm like, pre pra so pray where
24:32
Speaker 1: reave me, Please relieve me from the bondage of self.
24:37
Speaker 1: Because it is here summating.
24:41
Speaker 2: I wish I could just unzip and like walk out
24:43
Speaker 2: of my body and just leave it there.
24:44
Speaker 1: For the amount of times that I wish I could
24:46
Speaker 1: leave my personality at the.
24:47
Speaker 2: Door, It's like I just want to like take my
24:49
Speaker 2: brain out, put it there and just not be anybody
24:52
Speaker 2: for a minute.
24:53
Speaker 1: You know, God should have planned this a little better.
24:56
Speaker 1: He should have been He should have made it so
24:58
Speaker 1: that when it's time to go to bed, you remove
25:00
Speaker 1: part of your brain, replug it in, and so you
25:04
Speaker 1: don't think about anything except for powering down and going
25:06
Speaker 1: to sleep. I feel like we'd be much more productive,
25:09
Speaker 1: you know.
25:09
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we're headed towards You're gonna crawl into
25:11
Speaker 2: like a little tank and it'll do that for you.
25:15
Speaker 1: Right. That's terrifying. So that one I really related to,
25:19
Speaker 1: like the anxiety over nothing and you just suddenly like
25:22
Speaker 1: there are times where all land bed and I'm like,
25:24
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not stressed. Something's wrong.
25:27
Speaker 2: That's what I do. If I'm like, I'll be like,
25:30
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, my brain is clear, and then I think,
25:33
Speaker 2: but my life isn't.
25:34
Speaker 1: So while am I not stressed, I'm stressed that I'm
25:38
Speaker 1: not stressed. I'm obsessed with this person, she said my brain.
25:41
Speaker 1: I wish I was a genius the same I.
25:45
Speaker 2: Watch Sheldon or Young Sheldon and Big Bang Theory. Yeah,
25:51
Speaker 2: I wish I were just any of them. Yeah.
25:53
Speaker 1: That would be intense too, though, because then you walk
25:56
Speaker 1: around life and you're like, I won't.
25:58
Speaker 2: Be really, I know. That's why you only hang out
26:01
Speaker 2: with other scientists.
26:02
Speaker 1: Right you? You you only kick it with the people
26:05
Speaker 1: in your class.
26:06
Speaker 2: Well remember our cousin which one Jeff oh genius. Remember
26:11
Speaker 2: Dad would tell him jokes and he'd just look at
26:13
Speaker 2: him and go, yeah, so how are the kids. That's
26:19
Speaker 2: a common ground.
26:20
Speaker 1: I have kids, You have kids. Let's stick to that.
26:22
Speaker 2: Dad would always look at me and go like, yeah,
26:25
Speaker 2: right over his head. But it's like, no, I just is.
26:27
Speaker 1: He just is not. He would rather tell you how
26:29
Speaker 1: to like connect a kneecap, yeah, back to its place?
26:33
Speaker 2: What an achilles pop? I'll teach you how to put
26:35
Speaker 2: it together. Yeah. No, I'm just gonna tell you a
26:37
Speaker 2: teddy joke.
26:38
Speaker 1: Yeah right. I'd rather just talk about like exactly no,
26:42
Speaker 1: seriously that I was never good at setting boundaries and
26:46
Speaker 1: being too much of a people pleaser. I'm horrific with boundaries.
26:49
Speaker 1: That's why I am.
26:51
Speaker 2: That's why I am where I am.
26:54
Speaker 1: People think I'm good at setting boundaries. I set the
26:56
Speaker 1: boundary after it's too late.
26:58
Speaker 2: Yes, and then you're in the boat of if I
27:02
Speaker 2: set the boundary. Now, how are they going to look
27:05
Speaker 2: at me and are we even going to be friends?
27:07
Speaker 1: So then I continue just like I don't want to
27:11
Speaker 1: say people pleaser, but I just continue doing what I do.
27:15
Speaker 1: And then I realize that I'm getting walked on, and
27:17
Speaker 1: then they do something that we can't come back from,
27:20
Speaker 1: and then now we end up hating each other because
27:23
Speaker 1: then I go off and deliver the shitty package because it's.
27:27
Speaker 2: The last straw you've felt being walked on by this person,
27:30
Speaker 2: and then you're fucking done.
27:31
Speaker 1: Yeah, I relate. I would like to start setting boundaries.
27:35
Speaker 2: That's my new Year's resolution. I think boundaries, setting boundaries
27:38
Speaker 2: for myself, healthy boundaries.
27:41
Speaker 1: I said to Stossy the other day. I was like,
27:42
Speaker 1: you are the queen, Like this is why you are
27:45
Speaker 1: where you are because you are great at letting people
27:49
Speaker 1: know without letting them know, you will not pass this point.
27:52
Speaker 1: And she was like, setting boundaries is my most favorite thing.
27:54
Speaker 2: But here's the thing. If you were to ask Stossy
27:58
Speaker 2: and you get to know, it's just to know. I've
28:00
Speaker 2: seen people ask you, and I think it's because you
28:03
Speaker 2: make a party when you're like, no, I don't want
28:04
Speaker 2: to go up. They like, and there's multiple people like
28:09
Speaker 2: if somebody tells me no, I'm just like, all right, cool.
28:11
Speaker 2: If I tell somebody no, they're like, bro, come on,
28:14
Speaker 2: it'll be fun. I've seen them like, law, you have
28:17
Speaker 2: to come, we'll miss you. And then you feel this
28:20
Speaker 2: pressure and then it's like, well, I don't want to
28:24
Speaker 2: make them feel a certain way, but it's like I
28:26
Speaker 2: just want to say, don't stop doing that. I don't
28:30
Speaker 2: want to go. Don't make me feel bad.
28:31
Speaker 1: For not going out right exactly.
28:33
Speaker 2: And that's a boundary I need to set because I'll
28:35
Speaker 2: say no, then they guilt me into going. I go,
28:38
Speaker 2: I don't pass off, and then I'll get in a
28:42
Speaker 2: fight or oh no, I just you know, you're just
28:46
Speaker 2: short fused again something, and then you just get into
28:48
Speaker 2: an argument about nothing you care about.
28:51
Speaker 1: Which I'm already short fused.
28:53
Speaker 2: So canceling is my favorite thing.
28:55
Speaker 1: But yeahs my favorite thing too. I think that's another
28:58
Speaker 1: thing I wish I would change, is.
28:59
Speaker 2: Like when but then that fills with this healthy boundary.
29:03
Speaker 1: Mom made us honor commitments too much as kids to
29:07
Speaker 1: now where we are and we're adults where I'm like,
29:10
Speaker 1: guess what, Mom, I don't have to honor.
29:12
Speaker 2: Anything, right, Yes, because every day I'd wake up, you
29:18
Speaker 2: have volleyball and basketball. Then you're going to your friend's house.
29:21
Speaker 1: Now, I told you that you had to stick with
29:23
Speaker 1: it for a year, and if you still don't enjoy it,
29:25
Speaker 1: then you can give it up.
29:27
Speaker 2: I don't.
29:28
Speaker 1: I don't do any of it. I don't do any
29:30
Speaker 1: of it. How depressing.
29:31
Speaker 2: Yeah, So setting healthy boundaries will, in my opinion, make
29:36
Speaker 2: us better with like sticking with plans and not canceling,
29:40
Speaker 2: because we won't feel the guilt.
29:42
Speaker 1: And we'll say right from the joke. You want to
29:43
Speaker 1: know what I'm gonna start telling people, I'll let you
29:47
Speaker 1: know day of Well, we're making a reservation and we
29:50
Speaker 1: won't be able to fake. Then don't count on you.
29:52
Speaker 1: I will let you know data to me neither. By
29:55
Speaker 1: the way, my daughter Ocean, who you know.
29:58
Speaker 2: I do know her, she's my daughter.
30:00
Speaker 1: Yeah, great at setting boundaries, great at setting boundaries. And
30:04
Speaker 1: I believe that's because she's Pisces double sign rising in sun.
30:08
Speaker 1: She came into the world as a Pisces and what
30:11
Speaker 1: she portrays to the world is Pisces. There's no conflict.
30:14
Speaker 1: My Virgo and Scorpio constantly are at each other's throats.
30:18
Speaker 1: She is who she is. I don't want to do it.
30:21
Speaker 1: I'm not doing it. A little tough when I have
30:23
Speaker 1: to go to parent teacher conference, but it's fine.
30:27
Speaker 2: I don't have to do that. Thank God.
30:28
Speaker 1: You're like, she wouldn't do X, Y, and Z, and
30:30
Speaker 1: I'm like boundaries. Wow, don't we all wish that we
30:33
Speaker 1: had them at the age of three and a half.
30:36
Speaker 2: That's where they yank them away from us. I know.
30:38
Speaker 1: I'm like, why are we trying to fight this? This
30:41
Speaker 1: is what we try to get them to do in
30:43
Speaker 1: the real world. But she's going to spend more time
30:45
Speaker 1: in the real world than she is in this I know.
30:48
Speaker 1: So Also, it'll set up don't kill her, imagine think
30:51
Speaker 1: should I know? Let her think she's the bus she
30:53
Speaker 1: is she is. I had fun this episode Easton.
30:56
Speaker 2: Is it already over?
30:58
Speaker 1: Yeah? I had a tit tits LaRue as dad would say,
31:02
Speaker 1: it was tit. You guys, thank you so much for
31:04
Speaker 1: writing in. I appreciate you. Thank you for listening to
31:07
Speaker 1: another episode of the Give Them Lalla podcast. Keep in
31:10
Speaker 1: mind you can also watch this episode on YouTube. Now.
31:14
Speaker 1: We'll catch you guys on Wednesday, and then again for
31:16
Speaker 1: another boner episode next week. Bye Bye,