Latest / The Steve & Jeff Show / S4 E14 - Recipes for Healthy Eating

Transcript

S4 E14 - Recipes for Healthy Eating · The Steve & Jeff Show

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the Steven Jeff Show, the funniest podcast ever.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_01: Hey people, I don't write the words, I just read them.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_01: Be sure and follow or subscribe to the Stephen Jeff Show wherever you listen to podcasts.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_01: Write us a review while you're there too.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_01: And now, here's Steve and Jeff.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_01: Well, hey Johnny, thanks for bringing us into the show.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I'll tell you what, Jeff, I have never seen so many January white sales.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: Can you believe it?
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_01: I think our king has really brought white sales out in the open.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_02: But the best part is those white sales are not limited to Louisiana, Alabama, Arkansas anymore.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_02: Now they're nationwide and they're pushing on making them worldwide.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_02: Starting with Greenland, I understand.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_02: So how have you been, Jeff?
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_02: To quote Rodney Dangerfield, I'm fine now, but I've been really sick.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: It's weird, Steve, because you know, in general, I'm a fairly healthy person.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_02: But recently I came down with I think it's the flu.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_02: It really knocked me off my feet.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it might have been the flu.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: It might have been food poisoning, though.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_02: It kind of makes sense.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think anyone else in my family got sick, so but I'm I'm eating the same stuff I always eat.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_02: So I don't know.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_02: Does food poisoning start like the day before?
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_01: Or I think it depends on what you got food poisoned with.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_01: If you got food poisoned with shellfish, it starts sooner than if you got food poisoned with, oh I don't know, carrots.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: And we're talking shellfish that is refrigerated?
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_02: Because I know some shellfish just we we always think of them as being in their natural habitats, which is just out, you know, like in water.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's very shellfish of them too, who want to be in their national habitat all the time.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_01: We can't have that.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_01: But I am really discovering more and more, certainly as we get older, how important it is to eat right.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: It really has a lot to do with how we feel and what we can do, how we act.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: And you know that other Rodney thing, we are what we eat.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, there's so many jokes there, Jeff.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: I can't even begin to plow the field, so to speak.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_02: My first step probably should have been, I guess I'm over it now, but I should have gone through what I ate over the last couple days.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: And Steve, there really wasn't anything that would cause this.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I had the normal breakfast, hojos and donuts.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you mix the hojos and the donuts.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh, see, that that could be a problem.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: Because it's dough and dough, you know?
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_02: Mm-hmm.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_02: The donuts were vanilla icing, so you're mixing black and you're mixing the mixing the colors of the donuts.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, see, that's that's that whole white sale thing.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, no, no.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_02: Can't do that.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_02: And then for lunch, I had KFC.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I have I try to have as much KFC as possible.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_02: They were leftovers from New Year's or Christmas.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_01: Somebody has to eat that baked lard.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: You know how much baked lard we'd have if nobody ate KFC?
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, you know, yeah, I agree.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_02: And then for dinner, I don't remember what I had because I definitely had more edibles.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_02: Those are good for you.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: And those are perfectly sterile.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, those are those are good.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_02: And I get the orange flavored ones, so you know, I'm getting vitamin C.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_02: I'm trying to stay away from red meat unless it's processed.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_02: Because processed means that it's been inspected.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_02: I think for dinner I generally have a combination of sausage and bacon.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't know.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_02: Is there anything in there that I should be worried about?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: Do you think the inspection with the processing is really very important because they look at it and they go, Yep, that's meat.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_01: Really, it's it's a thorough, it's an exhaustive.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_01: It's a microscopic exam.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: So what about you?
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: You always seem very healthy to me.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: I try to, yeah.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: What's your secret?
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: I think it all started with my mom's cooking.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_01: I gotta tell you.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_01: I got on the right path with her cooking, and I've just kind of stayed there.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_01: Funny you should bring this up because you know, over the holidays, I was hanging with my mom, of course, and we were you know, we were doing the usual stuff, and I found an old cookbook that she had put together.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's a cookbook of her best recipes.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: I knew she had done this, but I kind of forgot, and there it was.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_01: I started looking through it, and oh Jeff, this brought back so many childhood memories, of course, but then it also gave me so many cooking ideas for today and tomorrow and beyond.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_01: I've got the book here, it's not even the other side of that glass.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it would be helpful if I give you some of these recipes because my mom really set me up on a healthy way of eating, and maybe it could work for you too.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_02: I know, and I've noticed that Johnny is very healthy as well.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_02: And yeah, I know that he's dating your mom.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_02: So I I am interested in this, and I'm gonna take notes.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_02: Now, all these recipes require cooking.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_02: To some extent.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: I some of them are more cooking and others.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: Well, some of them don't involve what we would call cooking in quotes.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: You know, the yeah, you see those air quotes, right?
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: Uh they do involve some preparation.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: Let me give you an example.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_01: Now I know please, I know you want her recipe for mac and cheese, and I've got it, but I can't give it to you yet.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to lead off with that because then all the listeners will turn off.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: They'll they'll say, Oh, I got the recipe, I'm gonna go make it, boom, gone.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_01: Not gonna hear it.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_02: Well, and give it to me at the end because you know, I usually have to visit the bathroom right after that instead of breaking up the show.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: It's not even eating the mac and cheese, it's you hear about the mac and cheese, and you have to go, right?
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_01: That's that brings lactose intolerance to a whole new achievement.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I'm against intolerance.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: Intolerance is is intolerable.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: I cannot stand it.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_02: What are we starting with here?
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well, uh let's start off.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: Now everybody loves Italian food.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: Italian food is kind of a universal food in a lot of ways, you know.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's pasta and sauce and olive oil and garlic.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's just it's just so good.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_01: My mom makes an incredible spaghetti sauce.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: Of course, you know, it's my mom, so it's uh it's called Mama's vodka sauce, right?
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, of course.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: But it's it's like, you know, you get vodka sauce in some of the fancy Italian restaurants, but this one, oh, you're gonna like this one.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: Please take notes at home, and you will love this recipe.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_01: I am right now.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: First thing, you mince two cloves of garlic, then you chop three Roma tomatoes.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: And it's gotta be Roma, the egg-shaped ones, not those beef steaks.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, don't do those.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: Gotta do the Romas.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: You put all that in the pan, you add olive oil, then you open a quart bottle of vodka, and you let the tomatoes and garlic and oil cook until the tomatoes are soft.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: You do it on kind of a medium heat, but just let them go for a while until the tomatoes get really soft, and then you drink some of the vodka, and every now and again you throw a little in the pot.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: Then once the tomatoes are soft, you pour a bunch more in, and then you bring all that to a boil, and then simmer it while you know you probably have two, three more drinks while you're doing that.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: If the sauce is too thick, though, and this is important, sometimes it reduces faster than you'd like, you know.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: So if the sauce is too thick, take that quarter vodka and just dump the rest in.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: And then cook that for a few minutes, then pour it over pasta and serve it with drinks.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: That has worked for my mom and me for all these years.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_02: Couple questions.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you mentioned about putting all that stuff in the pot.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_02: What if you put the pot in the stuff?
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I'm just spitning here and I'm not spitballing into the spaghetti.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: No, because that would not be sanitary.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that wouldn't be good.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_02: But so can I put my my medicine?
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_02: I like to call it my medicine.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah my medicine into the sauce, or should I have it separate?
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: That is a brilliant idea to put it into the sauce because that would be a wonderful oregano substitute.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_01: I just know oregano has sometimes been a substitute for your medicine back in the ditchweed days.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_01: What a great substitute for oregano, because that would not only give you flavor, it would kind of enhance the purpose of the vodka sauce, if you know what I mean.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_02: I think what you're trying to tell me is that this should be my go-to spaghetti.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, if you're so I should because uh right now uh I'm a big spaghettios fan.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and those are those are so great and authentic.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, they're easy to make, but there's not a drop of vodka in the can of spaghettios.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: And so you won't get that great taste or that great feeling after you eat the vodka.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_02: And now what meal would a spaghetti be for?
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_02: Is it is it a breakfast?
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_02: Is it midnight snacks?
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_02: I've had it for breakfast.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I've had it for breakfast, snacks, lunch, dinner, midnight snacks, 3 a.m.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_01: snacks.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's good enough.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_02: So I could have a side of bacon with it.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe more the carbonara, but yeah, you could do that if you want.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, good, good.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: I feel healthier already.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you're gonna love the next one then.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: If you like spaghetti, you probably also like ramen.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_01: Your ramen noodles, you know, it's kind of like spaghetti meets Asia.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: And actually, ramen came before the spaghetti because Marco Polo and all that, but I digress, you know.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: So it it was actually Asian and then it became Italian.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: But my mom makes a great ramen recipe.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_02: Uh so no, so wait, so this is ramen, not ram, because it I didn't know if this was like the the mayor of Chicago's recipe or oh gosh, no.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_01: This is no, okay, okay Oh my gosh, no, nothing to do with him.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, please.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_02: Is he still around?
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_02: I think he is.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_02: Somebody said he was gonna be running for governor.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_02: Good man, you know, and so easygoing.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, oh yeah, very nice guy.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_02: You just I think the first time I ever saw him, I said to myself, this is a guy that you want at the party that you want to have a bouncer.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_01: If he's at the party, you're gonna need a bouncer.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_02: That is true.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so these are noodles, and when you say noodles, you're talking about things that are long and thin and skinny.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_01: The ramen is a little more curled and kinky, if you will.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, there's nothing particularly kinky about the recipe.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: Now, what you do while you're eating it, up completely up to you, could be kinky.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: But the noodles are a little kinky.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: Here's my mom's recipe.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_01: So you boil two cups of ramen noodles in four cups of water, or a variant that she does is she does two cups of water, two cups of vodka.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: It softens it quicker and it makes for a you know, let's face it, a more flavorable ramen.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: You know, because some people think ramen has no taste, but it does have a vodka taste, then if you use this two water, two vodka.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so while that's boiling, that takes a while to boil.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_01: It takes about six minutes or so.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: So you're gonna have a drink, yeah, maybe two drinks, six minutes.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, that's probably two drinks.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: So well, six minutes.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: I can do a lot in six minutes.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: Kathy says that all the time.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: That's like the sum total of like the last five years, right?
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_02: I can actually spend some time with Kathy and make the noodles.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_02: And make the noodles, yes, absolutely.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_02: And get that all underneath.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: And have two drinks.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: No problem.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_01: These are noodles that are flexible.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: They become more flexible as you cook them.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: They're not real flexible when they start, it's kind of crisp and crunchy.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_01: But then they become flexible.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_02: That's exactly what I'm talking about here.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: They become flexible.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_01: You cook those about six minutes or so, you boil it.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_02: And you would say they come become flexible when you're done.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, pretty much.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_01: They tend to be a little more limp when they're done.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: When they're done, yes.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: But when you first start, when they start first start, they're they're solid, yes.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: Solid.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay, got it.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: So then you drain the ramen, and then you let it this is the key part.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you drain it because that's a lot of people just eat it right there.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta let it marinate in vodka and peppercorns for two hours.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_01: And so you don't want to put too much vodka in because you want to keep drinking during those two hours, right?
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_01: So you just drink some more, and then you take that marinade after two hours and you microwave it for five minutes until it's crispy again.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_01: Because see, you get them soft, but then you want to get it back crispy.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: That's that's the art of it, that's the beauty, that's the cycle of life of the ramen noodle.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: And then these make a great late-night snack with an edible.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: In fact, I have had it with an edible many times, and totally works.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_02: Well, now, what goes with a ramen noodle in terms of edibles?
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_02: Like, is there a flavor or a type?
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I think the watermelon flavor goes very well with it.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: I have had the banana flavor, and that's actually quite good too.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: Some people make like a peppercorn flavor.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_01: I wouldn't go for that because you already got the peppercorns in the ramen unless you're really like a pepper freak.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and you don't want the vodka competing with the edible.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_02: No, right.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_02: They need to really be together.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, they need to coincide, if you will.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: So that's why you don't really want to separate them in time by too much.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 12:42
  unknown: Yeah.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: You want to start them around the same time.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: I found that works every time.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have anything else on your list?
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I do.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_01: My gosh.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_01: There's so many things here, but my mom makes these popovers.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: Kind of a good breakfast or kind of a dessert item.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_01: She calls them the pop-of popovers, you know.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: So because of course they involve pop-up vodka.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: So basically, what you do, you take phyllo dough and you roll it out into three-inch squares.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: And you take some strawberry jam.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a Smuckers fan myself, but any good strawberry jam, you spoon a little bit of that onto the onto the tops.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_01: You bake those for 20 minutes.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_01: As soon as you put those in the oven, then you open that half gallon of papa vodka, and while they're baking, you get baked, and then you bring them out 20 minutes later and let them start to cool.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta let them cool a little bit because what you're gonna do, you're gonna take each one, you're gonna smash them together and make little popover sandwiches while you keep drinking.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_01: What do you call potovers?
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: Is that what you call them?
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: They could be they could be potovers, yes.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: They could be you could actually add with the strawberry jam, you could put some medicine, if you will, in there.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_02: I really like what your mom is is making, but I need to own it.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it needs to be something for me.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_02: Adding a little bit of here or there of stuff that I I normally consume, and I it's pretty much only one thing.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: So I like to find a way to integrate that into the recipes you're giving me.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_01: Speaking of breakfast, and this is good for brunch or lunch, too.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_01: She's got a wonderful I I call it Steve's mom's magical omelet.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: It has caused the sun to rise so many mornings for me.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_01: Let me give it to you here.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: You take three eggs, you crack them into a large bowl, and you dump in some vodka, and then you realize, hey, I put in too much vodka, I need some more eggs.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: So you go get a couple more eggs, you throw them in, then you realize, oh well, now I got too many eggs and needs more vodka, you put some more vodka in.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_01: You keep going until the bowl is full.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_01: And it really doesn't matter what size, just until it's full.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_01: Then you throw in any cheese or veggies that you might have on hand, uh, and then you put it all into a cast iron pan and you cook it until the vodka bottle's empty.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_01: I tell you, this is great pairing, a great brunch pairing with a drink that she makes.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_01: So you sp really served this with Steve's mom's Bloody Mary, which let me let me give you that one too.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_01: That's kind of an add-on here.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_01: If you have any vodka left over from the omelet, you put it into an eight-ounce glass, then you add horseradish, then you dump the contents of the glass into a half gallon of vodka, and you serve and enjoy.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_02: Wow, like I said, I this is this is exactly what I needed.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_02: Where were you, you know, years ago when there's Rodney with that, I was in bad shape back then, but now you know I feel better.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_02: But I think this is gonna add 10 years to my life.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_01: And it'll be 10 fun years, too.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: Let me tell you, you will enjoy that 10 more than the last 10.
• 15:42
  unknown: Good.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_02: You have to send a thank you note to your mom because you know she's saved my life.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_01: She'd be glad to know that that her recipes helped.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_01: And now, Jeff, I know, I know you and those millions, let's face it, Jeff, the millions of listeners.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: I know that they're all they're all waiting for the mac and cheese recipe that she is so famous for.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_01: So this is my mom's famous mac and cheese.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_01: She's gonna hate that I'm divulging this, but you know, some things you just have to do for the listeners.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you know what I'm saying?
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_01: So I agree.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: So here's here's what you do: you buy a package of craft mac and cheese.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_01: The cheese whiz one, not the powder one.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Don't do the powder.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, no, no.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta do the one with the cheese whiz.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: And then you take any extra cheese that you might have left over from your cocktail hour, or maybe if you didn't use all the cheese in that in that omelet, throw in some extra cheese, then you add sour cream, because you know there's really not enough fat content in there yet.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_01: You want to balance your carbs and protein and fat, and and you there's a lot of carbs in there, and so you got to really throw more fat in.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: So add sour cream, then you flavor it, salt, pepper, and and vodka, of course, and then you you drink some more vodka, and then you cook it and keep drinking until uh you feel like you're gonna hallucinate, and then serve it hot.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I found this really goes well with pepper vodka, so you gotta have some peppercorn steeping in the vodka, and overnight is is best for that, but you can do it on the spot, but really letting it sit overnight, mm-mm mm, that gives you a wonderful, a wonderful vodka.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_02: There seems to be a common thread here that I I think could be a problem for me.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_02: It looks like, it sounds like you are adding things that you would buy at the store that are not your basic spam or potato chips or Reese's peanut butter cups, which is generally what I use the store for.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm gonna have to start shopping.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_02: What kind of store would I be going to to get things like I don't know, did you say sour cream?
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_02: I have cream that is soured.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I don't know if that would be a good idea.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_02: Well, sometimes that can work.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_01: That can work if you just have cream which let us sit around.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_02: So, where do you suggest that I do this shop?
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_02: Is it considered shopping?
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that would be shopping, and it would be groceries, which I know is a new word for a lot of people.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_02: Groceries never existed.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: And groceries are very affordable.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_01: And you hear the air quotes there.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: Affordable, affordable, that's another new word.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, not a big fan of the word affordable, you know, that doesn't but it's a hoax.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: Where you would go is I find the best shopping for things like sour cream and groceries is done at the liquor store.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I personally like affordable liquors is my my own my go-to, but they have locations worldwide.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_01: They're opening one in Greenland, I understand, too.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I I would go there, and I think they'll really have all your basic food needs, like lemon juice, Tabasco sauce, Worcestershire sauce.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_01: What else could you want?
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_01: Pork rinds.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_01: Pork rinds.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: They oh they definitely got pork rinds.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: Now those are behind the counter because people steal those.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_01: Those are behind the counter.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta you gotta watch what's up with the Shivus Regal, you know?
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_02: And if I can't find it there, I go to a 7-Eleven, which are oftentimes next to each other.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_01: 7-Eleven is very similar in a lot of ways to the affordable liquor store.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's just it has a little more of the quote unquote food items, but it's very similar.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_02: Uh it's really usually have like one onion, 7 onion, tomato.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and where affordable liquors might have five different types of chips.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, you know, the 7 Eleven probably has 25 different types of chips.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's a but it's it's similar.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: That's why it's called 7 Eleven.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_01: There you go.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_01: Well, thank heaven.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_02: Perfect.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_02: Well, well, I'm all set.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_02: I I have to be honest with you, I'm just not sure I'm ready for that level of what would you what do you call that?
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_02: Cooking.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_02: Of cooking, yeah.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_02: Preparing, shopping, cooking.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_02: Uh I'm sort of set in my ways, you know.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_02: I've I've been doing it this way for a long time.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_02: Well, what what what kind of stuff have you been eating?
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_02: For the most part, I know it seems that I'm pretty random in general with my personality, but I do try to limit it.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_02: I put them in categories, and I'll give you an example.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_02: So one category would be cookies or snacks, right?
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't just grab anything, you know, I look for I look for the the good stuff, you know, chips a boy cookies, Oreos, Twinkies, any hostess products.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's a sign of quality right there.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_02: Fruit, big fan of fruit, and you would think that that would you know that would help make me healthy, you know, frozen chocolate bananas, yeah.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_02: Wonderful.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_01: And thinking about hostess, those hostess fruit pies.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: To die for.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_01: You know, when I was in high school, a friend of mine took a bite of a hostess fruit pie and threw it up on the terracotta ceiling, and I bet it's still there.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_01: I bet it's still there, and it's probably still edible.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: That is the sign of quality, let me tell you.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_01: Talk about the old days.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if you remember strawberries are very healthy for you.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_02: And my mom used to buy these strawberries, they were in these little containers in the freezer section.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_02: They were in syrup.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_02: They were in like sugar syrup.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_02: Strawberries and heavy syrup.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I love them.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_02: And heavy syrup.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_02: So I I don't know if they still make those, but those are the kinds of things that you know I tend to buy myself.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_01: I pulled a muscle lifting one of those strawberries with heavy syrup one time.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was it was tough.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, those were uh otherwise, my go-to is peanut butter.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: Because peanut butter is just good for everything, it does it all.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_02: And then for desserts, you know, you're talking about basic candy.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know if you belong to Costco, but Costco has those big jars of MMs, and those are what I call my weekly supply of MMs.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, because you can just eat those forever and Tootsie Roll Pops, which are portable, right?
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_02: Sure, eat those anywhere.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: You can be at a at a play or ballet and you can pop one of those in.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_02: It probably needs to do some work.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_02: Uh that's what I'm sensing here.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: I'm going to commit to doing that.
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know when spring is.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_02: Is that is that now or not yet.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_01: We got a little bit of time.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_01: Let's see if that's hard to tell.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, good.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_02: You started me off on the right path to being healthy.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_02: And all that stuff sounds delicious.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: Well, and I I I think you're on the right track with peanut butter because the great thing about peanut butter is it gives you protein, it gives you fats, it gives you carbs.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_01: It also, if you need some bathtub caulk, it's perfect.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_01: You just spread it on.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: I found the smooth is a little better for the caul, the crunchy is a little better, the super chunk, if you will, as we talked about Skippy a few weeks ago, the super chunk is a little better for the healthy balance, if you know what I mean, because you get you get some actual fiber in there.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_01: But nothing wrong with peanut butter.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_02: Kind of what you're saying, I'm just interpreting, is that within these recipes, there are so many benefits in terms of nutrition.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_02: Kind of like cereal, right?
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, when you get cereal, it's full of so many good things for you.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_02: So that's my shortcut to eating well is grab some Captain Crunch or Lucky Charms, you know, because everything in there is it's got sugar, it's got multodextrin, it's got BHT.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_01: I mean everybody thinks about their daily protein and carbs and all that.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody thinks about their daily requirement of BHT.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_01: Where's the BHT lobby?
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_01: Where's the BHT when when we need help?
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I feel great.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm gonna start right away.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe I can have you over for dinner.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe you and your mom can come over.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_02: I'll make one of the dishes that you gave me, one of the recipes.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe I'll have her bring over some of the mac and cheese.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_02: Ooh, that'd be good.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_02: And Johnny's welcome to come, but yeah.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_02: We get enough of Johnny probably.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_01: He keeps doing that announcer thing at the table.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's kind of annoying.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, God, I hate that.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_01: If I say, hey, can you pass the paper?
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_01: He'll go, right, Steve.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_02: You know, well, and the best part is he doesn't listen to our show, so we can talk about it.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_01: Well, no, you know.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: He couldn't care less about the show.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_01: He just walks in, walks out.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and he's just waiting for you to say, okay, Steve, or take it away, or whatever, you know, whatever that signal is.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_02: And then, you know, he comes in and he does his 30 seconds of gold or whatever he considers it to be.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_02: And or or bronze, or he thinks, yeah, he thinks that makes the show great, but I don't want to disappoint him.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_02: But enough about Johnny.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, too much about Johnny.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_01: We are just about to get kicked out of eccentric Lady Lynn studio here, but excellent.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: I can't wait to see the healthier Jeff, the new Jeff, the Jeff with a diet that puts a song in his heart.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so jacked.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't care about your private life.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_02: I really don't.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_01: You do whatever you want to do.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_02: I was trying to figure out a way to say jacked off, but it it doesn't really fit.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:01
  unknown: Yes.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: I keep hearing that.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_01: I keep hearing that it doesn't fit, but but I digress.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_01: Johnny, as we were just saying, you better get us out of this show while we still can.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: All right, Steve.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: Here's the pepper.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: This has been a gastroindustrial production in association with stomach pump media.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_00: Read all about Steve and Jeff at their website, step and Jeff.com.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: This is Johnny Pinkie.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_00: All this talk about food has made me hungry.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: And Steve's mom is such a fantastic cook.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, there's a backup cheese, but there's so much more.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_01: Why, just last night, she made Rottini and Romano.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_01: Such a diverse and versatile cook.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: Good night!