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Bonus IMPROV - Your Steak's Too Juicy and Your Lobster's Too Buttery · Very Fine Friends

• 0:00
  welcome to very five friends bonus improv yeah joking we get a word
• 0:22
  remodeled
• 0:25
  remodeled
• 0:28
  remodeled
• 0:29
  hey
• 0:33
  hey
• 0:34
  um
• 0:36
  have you ever
• 0:39
  you've owned a bunch of houses
• 0:41
  you're making me sound really rich
• 0:42
  I moved a lot
• 0:44
  have you ever
• 0:46
  okay yeah I don't know why I didn't speak up immediately
• 0:49
  so when
• 0:51
  When I was growing up in my childhood home, I'll have to take you by it sometime.
• 0:55
  Okay.
• 0:56
  I could take you to the street and I guarantee you could pick up the house.
• 0:59
  But I'll explain to you what it was.
• 1:02
  My dad bought this house and started this weird, it was on an acre property.
• 1:08
  So, I had the house.
• 1:09
  And in the back there was like a freestanding, like smaller house.
• 1:12
  And then like another small house.
• 1:16
  It was pretty cool actually.
• 1:18
  And he started this weird construction project.
• 1:21
  um we're in our home became the eyesore of the neighborhood um and if you drive by it to this
• 1:28
  day it's still like heinously ugly in my opinion no offense to the people who live there and if
• 1:35
  you're listening and we know you are cry about it um it's he built a garage so big i don't even
• 1:42
  think you can understand he built a garage that was so big that it's like you could drive a plane
• 1:48
  in it it's a it was a humongous one like i'm gonna say one stall garage because it's not like there
• 1:56
  was multiple that was so big that like it drew attention like crazy and on top of that he built
• 2:05
  a second level so there's like two windows because eventually he wanted to like build a
• 2:09
  like an apartment upstairs in the garage but it was like it's so ugly why did he do this
• 2:18
  did you have a giant truck or something no then it was just a very tall you said it was like a
• 2:25
  single car yeah but tall and wide like it wait how was it single car if it was wide because the garage was only one like there wasn it was a single garage door but super wide So he didn get a door proportional to the garage
• 2:42
  Or two doors?
• 2:43
  I think the idea was you could drive something humongous
• 2:45
  because there was no brake.
• 2:51
  How do you feel about that?
• 2:53
  I was embarrassed by that house.
• 2:55
  Did he like paint it a weird color or anything?
• 2:57
  Didn't have to.
• 3:00
  I'm going to see if there's a picture.
• 3:02
  I'll put the picture of it on the website without the address.
• 3:06
  Okay.
• 3:06
  I don't want to shame anyone.
• 3:09
  Well, did you store things in it at least?
• 3:12
  Nothing that needed to be stored in there.
• 3:14
  Like just like normal stuff.
• 3:16
  My dad always had ideas.
• 3:18
  Okay.
• 3:23
  Okay.
• 3:23
  It doesn't look that bad.
• 3:26
  It's better you just imagine it the way I said.
• 3:28
  Okay.
• 3:29
  it was ugly though
• 3:32
  and like the neighbors
• 3:34
  would like tell me it was ugly
• 3:36
  because I would
• 3:38
  hang out with them play with their kids
• 3:40
  I was a kid
• 3:42
  but yeah like we all
• 3:46
  we all had a little joke where it was like this
• 3:48
  like what's your dad doing over there I'm like I don't know
• 3:50
  and now
• 3:53
  improv
• 3:59
  uh honey um maybe quick question um i i asked you to get um to get us a toaster
• 4:12
  and you came back with this thing that's it's only got two slots in it we can only cook two
• 4:23
  things to toast in it but you could fit a human being into each slot yeah it's the welder model
• 4:30
  honey get in i'm not gonna get in no i want to show you i'll get in too
• 4:37
  no this is gonna toast us what's the problem you wanted a toaster here we are in a big toaster
• 4:44
  i wanted a toaster that would fit slices of bread and i said get get a slight get a like
• 4:50
  slightly bigger one so that it'll fit a piece of rye toast too.
• 4:57
  The wider rye toast.
• 4:59
  Your steak's too juicy and your lobster's too buttery.
• 5:02
  I did a great job.
• 5:04
  Honey we can use this to toast things Only gigantic things Shh Lenore Come upstairs I got something to show you You know how you wanted a new hair dryer Oh God Yeah
• 5:21
  Look, I got it from a defunct car wash.
• 5:25
  Yeah, it's a car wash.
• 5:26
  Yeah. We're installing it over the shower.
• 5:30
  This thing will blow your boobs off.
• 5:32
  I don't want my boobs blown off.
• 5:34
  I just want my hair dried.
• 5:39
  Oh, they'll be dry if they're even still on.
• 5:42
  My hair?
• 5:44
  This baby has 300 horsepower.
• 5:46
  You gotta put earplugs on to use it.
• 5:49
  Oh, okay.
• 5:50
  Honey, this, you keep, you keep doing this.
• 5:55
  Bigger doesn't equal better.
• 5:58
  Not necessarily, anyway.
• 6:01
  Um, I'm sorry.
• 6:02
  I just try to be a good husband and make you happy.
• 6:06
  No, I appreciate that.
• 6:07
  I appreciate you putting in the effort, and it looks like the toaster probably cost a lot.
• 6:13
  It's huge.
• 6:13
  I guess I should return your new car.
• 6:15
  Oh, God.
• 6:16
  Oh.
• 6:17
  You got me a new car?
• 6:18
  I guess you don't want it.
• 6:19
  Well, no.
• 6:19
  I mean, I'd like to see it.
• 6:21
  Can I?
• 6:21
  Come on out.
• 6:22
  Okay.
• 6:23
  It's a Boeing.
• 6:25
  Oh, honey, no.
• 6:27
  Yes.
• 6:28
  Oh, you cut the wings off, too.
• 6:29
  Yes.
• 6:29
  So it's literally just drives on the ground.
• 6:32
  You're over traffic.
• 6:33
  You could drive over traffic.
• 6:35
  Oh, honey.
• 6:36
  Kiss me, Lenore.
• 6:37
  Lucas, this is too much.
• 6:45
  What?
• 6:45
  This is excessive.
• 6:46
  What do I do?
• 6:51
  Look, just...
• 6:52
  Take it all back?
• 6:54
  Yes, please.
• 6:55
  Take it back.
• 6:57
  All right.
• 6:58
  Go to the next day.
• 7:00
  All right, Lenore, it's all gone.
• 7:01
  Thank you, honey.
• 7:02
  I appreciate it.
• 7:03
  I picked up the toaster you wanted.
• 7:05
  Okay.
• 7:05
  Do you see that microscope on the counter?
• 7:10
  Yeah.
• 7:11
  Bring it over here.
• 7:13
  All right.
• 7:14
  Magnify.
• 7:16
  Magnify.
• 7:17
  Oh.
• 7:18
  Magnify.
• 7:19
  What do I...
• 7:20
  See it?
• 7:22
  There it is.
• 7:23
  Oh, my God.
• 7:24
  Is that the world's smallest toaster?
• 7:26
  I got it from the set of Downsize.
• 7:31
  That Matt Damon movie?
• 7:32
  Yes.
• 7:33
  go ahead toast something oh oh i can't oh i can't it's our bread our bread dwarfs this thing you
• 7:42
  know what's interesting lenore is normal toast would have fit in the other toaster
• 7:46
  yeah that all i saying but it no it would i mean it would have technically fit in there but you wouldn have been able to get it out without burning yourself you didn even let me tell you it came with s hooks okay were they gigantic s hooks yes lenore
• 8:05
  all right well i knew you're over correcting this is an over correction um i apologize
• 8:13
  I'm sorry.
• 8:15
  I have to go to work.
• 8:16
  Okay.
• 8:18
  Honey, where's my car?
• 8:20
  I got rid of it like you wanted.
• 8:22
  No, I wanted the wingless Boeing plane gone.
• 8:27
  I got rid of them both.
• 8:31
  Pick up those binoculars.
• 8:33
  Oh, no.
• 8:34
  Yeah, check it out.
• 8:35
  Oh.
• 8:35
  Right out the window.
• 8:37
  Parked just for you.
• 8:38
  Oh.
• 8:39
  RC.
• 8:41
  Remote controlled.
• 8:42
  I'm driving you to work, baby.
• 8:43
  No.
• 8:45
  How am I supposed to fit in there, Lucas?
• 8:48
  Stand like a flamingo.
• 8:50
  All right.
• 8:51
  I have to get to work.
• 8:52
  I can't be late again.
• 8:53
  I understand.
• 8:54
  I'll do better, Lenora.
• 8:55
  Okay.
• 8:55
  Start driving me, babe.
• 9:00
  This is kind of fun.
• 9:03
  Impracticality aside.
• 9:03
  Honk, honk.
• 9:05
  Get out of the road, B-word.
• 9:07
  Honk.
• 9:10
  Honey.
• 9:11
  Honey.
• 9:12
  it's losing it's you're too far away now
• 9:15
  oh no we're getting on the on ramp
• 9:17
  no no lenore
• 9:19
  cut to lenore's funeral
• 9:21
  oh my son
• 9:27
  i'm so sorry for your loss
• 9:29
  thank you father ravon
• 9:30
  um
• 9:31
  if you could just
• 9:33
  um lift her on top off of the
• 9:37
  very tiny coffin
• 9:38
  oh just for a moment
• 9:41
  oh i've never had to hold the deceased before it's okay it looks good on you
• 9:50
  i'm just gonna i'm just gonna put some tiny things in the coffin
• 9:55
  pictures and such okay you can put it down oh well
• 10:05
  now i'm free to find a little wife i guess
• 10:07
  and scene