Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #90 There's A Hole In Dad's Head!

Transcript

#90 There's A Hole In Dad's Head! · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Two times I had to merge across who was in.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Front of me to Lange Merds Lange mates, okay, carry on.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: In front of me with a glorious sight a dad
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: on an electric bike, no shirt on, gut hanging out,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: going down Oxford Street.
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: Nice.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: I know where he was going, and I was trying
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: to get out of the way. Cars just wouldn't let
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: me pass. I wouldn't let me in.
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: So you were stuck behind. I was stuck. Not the
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: worst thing to be stuck behind. Sydney drivers are really.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: Ah, throw pass.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Look to my left.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: I was like, Ash, welcome back to two going dads, Maddy.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: Ja and yeah, sorry.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: I wasn't expecting you to be so welcome back.
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: I was like, put your shoes on.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: You're like I did that. I was like, she stood
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: up in her bed and I was.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Like, this is the podcast all about parenting. It is
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: the good.
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: It is also the bad and the relatable. Thank you.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: If you've come for advice, don't do it. Don't It's
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: like going to a Chinese shop and then asking for pizza.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: You're not going to get it. Chinese shop, Chinese restaurant, restaurant. Yeah,
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: what about those like takeaway shops to do it all.
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: They do. They're like Chinese pizza kebabs.
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: We have one down the road from US.
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and in Bonda, in Bronchi, in Bronzy surprise, they
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: allowed it over there, but they.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: Did Brazilian Brazilian. They do Italian that pizza pasta. They
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: also do like pokey bowls as well. They you can
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: get like schnitty, you can.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: Get smell of the food boison.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: And one time I was so desperate it was the
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: only place that delivering. I think it was a rainy day.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: And another only ones opens like a Christmas Day. And
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: they also like the unbelievad kids fish and chips as well.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: Beautiful delicious the sponsor to bellow down a Bronte delicious lovely.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Happy Father's Day to me and to me Happy Father's
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: Day to you as well. One of the best dads
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: I've ever come across, if not the best dad. Can
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: I just say.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: You're talking about yourself again.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: You have done such a great job raising two incredible
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: children and you should be so proud.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: Now I feel bad for giving you a decent enough caw.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: That's fine, man. If you want to like shit on me,
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: you are a doting dad. One of the dosing is
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: right back at you. I'm not good compliments. How did
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: you celebrate? How sounds great?
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Sounds like what a day?
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: It was a nice day. It was hot, a hot day. Look,
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: it was just a general run of the middle day.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: It was good for the kids to be like, happy fasday.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: Little couple of little.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: Gifts and nothing too crazy.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: Couple of daycare gifts. Would you get?
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah? I got the mug standards beautiful. I got the
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: shitty artwork standard, which I told them my cherish forever.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: But now I don't know where it is. And I
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: got some seeds, excuse me, seedlings.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: It's like a little pot.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: What kind of plant was it?
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I just put it somewhere from him.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: Have you planted it?
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: He knows.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: I never do any gardening, but we can't because we're
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: living with Frank, my father in law.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: Shout out to Frank lovely man.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: Shut up, No he is. He love it. But Bob,
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: his partner is a real green thumb.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: So you gave you heard.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: He was here. But other than that, No, what about you?
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: How did you celebrate?
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I've got a couple of gifts from the kids, Both
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Marley and Lola gave me the exact same gift from daycare,
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: which was barbecue seasoning like a barbecue like a Cajun
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: season like. It was exact same from both and so
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: I opened rolls and she was like, close your eyes, daddy,
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: this is while so I'm still in bed, and I'm like, oh,
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: it's barbecue seasoning, which is great. And then Marley was
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: just as pumped and like, that's my turn. And then
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: I was like, I remember thinking.
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: As well I felt it.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: I was like, it's just quite similar, same seasoning. Yeah,
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: So daycare, not to criticize, because I'm very appreciative of
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: what you've given the kids to give me, but mix it.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: Up options clerical error. Think of all the dads that
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: only got one sashe of barbecue. Yeah, it sucks to you.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: But then I was pretty keen to go to the calf.
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: I saw you got breakfast in bed.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: How did you well? I wanted to go to the calf.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: I wasn't really that keen on breast cafe calf.
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: Hang on, is that what you call it? Or is
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: that what you think it's called.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: It's called the calf, It's called a calf. It's a cafe, yeah,
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: old calf. What do you want to call it? Cafe Calf? Sure,
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: let's not it hung up on the minor details. Marlie
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: was really excited. She had it fixated into her little
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: brain that she wanted to make me breakfast in bed.
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: Let's sweat.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: She had one of our cheese boards that she had boards.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: She had decorated it with some leaves and some bark
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: and other ornaments from the garden. Native they were, I
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: think they were native. I know a few succulent leaves
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: as well.
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: Laura was like, don't touch my plants.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: Ie and I in the morning, I said, I want
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: to go to to go out of my breakfast and
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Marley was like, no breakfast in bed. I was like, well,
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: it's my father's dates, my decision.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: She was like, get back to bed and right now.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: She wouldn't allow me to go get breakfast sales, but
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: I had to wait there. She made me breakfast in bed.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Finally came upstairs, gave me the plate toast on it
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: delicious peanut butter. Love that. And then Laula was like.
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: And then she she ate.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: The toast she gave me, or she gave me a
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: corner of crust that was like half warm from saliva.
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: Oh, very kindly, very.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: Kind And then I clean the house. Dude, that was it?
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: What a That's just a dad day, just a normal day.
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: That is a classic dad day. Father's Day is the
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: day to be more of a dad. So it's like,
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: clean the house, what the bumps, get them bath, get
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: out of bed.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: Job done.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: So yeah, well, great, Happy Father's Day and have a
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: files day to all the dads out there.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: We love you.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Shut up?
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: Can I be empathetic? Couldn't? Like? Can I be a
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: lot sympathetic? Is that?
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: I don't even know the words, But Happy Father's Day
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: to all the dad's out there.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I have to admit something to you, Ash, yep, And look,
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: it's not easy for me to be this honest with
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: you on the podcast in front of our audience. Are
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: they here, they're listening on When you've talked about shitting yourself,
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: my approach, my reaction to that, a knee jerk reaction,
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: if you will, has always been like, how how does
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: that happen?
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: You've done it?
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Ash? Over the weekend there was an incident, do you
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: know what. Weirdly, I wasn't hungover it wasn't off the
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: back of a really spicy meal. I was just doing
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: a simple WI standing obviously standing, we enjoying the Wii.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: The whee was great, the we was flowing. Everyone was
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: having a good time except midw My body was confused
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: in that moment. Somehow my body thought that we were
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: sitting down for a week and it was time to
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: do a poop. And just like as I was relaxing,
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: mid there's a moment I think, Midwi where you find
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: a moment in a piece and you shiver.
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: You're like.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: And I had to catch myself because my body was
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: about to do a poop. I was like, body, what
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: are you doing? Were standing up? Body was like, WHOA,
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: My bad? I read the did that scene completely wrong? Okay,
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: We're back to work, back to the office. My day
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: was was going to continue. Yeah, And then I thought
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: I felt something. I went went back to the bathroom.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: I inspected we had a bit of leakage.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: Nugget.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: No, I wouldn't say nugget. I'd say a kiss.
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: Like a Hershey's kiss.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was a Hershey's kiss, but it was it
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: like it was a it was a good kiss.
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: It was a bit of.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Tongue and my favorite undies as well. But then the
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: hard thing was ash. Hard thing was I was one
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: where I was debating. I don't know how you approach this,
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: like do I wash the undies or do I just
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: throw them out?
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: I got a rinse and wash like it's not it's
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: not like you murdered someone in them.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: I thought I would get rid of them.
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: Okay, so gone. I thought you were white ones. You
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: need to rethink that part of your wards.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: Now I'm at an age where white undies are no
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: longer an option.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: I just think altogether what undies should be abolished for men?
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: Women increase them, men abolish them. I think it's offensive.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: So I wanted to get rid of the mash. And
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: the problem was my mum was standing in the kitchen, yeah,
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: and she was standing near the sorry, she was standing
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: at the toilet in the kitchen. She was Mum was
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: standing near the kitchen near the bin. And so I
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: had to then like take the undies off, wrap them
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: up nice and tight so they would fit in my hand.
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: And I had to then like walk over to the
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: bin and like in an unsuspicious manner, put the onundies
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: in the bin. But there you did well. I also,
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: mum's seventy two, so she's easy to fall. Yeah. I
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: feel like I could come in with a unicorn.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: A mom would just be like, it would have been
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: really really funny if you're like, Mum, hold this for
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: a seconds.
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: Popped me in the hand and walked away, and.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: Then I looked in the mirror afterwards, I was just like,
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: who am I?
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: Welcome to the club? My friend.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: Once every few months I poot myself and it's it's
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: a good wake up call to remind you. It's like
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: a reset that you're alive and you're here. I, for one,
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: at the moment, would love to ship myself. I'm extremely constipated,
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: and that's because of all of the codin I have
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: been taking from a sore tooth.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: What is the limit? What is the maximum length of
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: time one person can continuously take coding?
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: Well?
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: Forever, I guess I don't know.
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: Here's the the thing I went.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: I went to the dentist, as we know, last week,
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: and he gave me some codeine to band aid the paint.
• 10:48
  Speaker 3: The dentist gave you coding, He gave me a script.
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: Did they do that?
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: Obviously they are again?
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: I went to well, the chemist willingly gave me the
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: from the doctor scripts.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: Hang on a second, this is from a duentess, and it.
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: Said one at a time, and then the cameras said
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: to me, you can take two at the time. It's fine,
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: And I was like, can I The amount of coding
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: they gave me was for to band aid up until
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: the extraction.
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: I went through it in about three days because I
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: was in that much pain.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you were, you called me wailing on the phone.
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: And now I have an addiction to prescription painkillers. No,
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: but I was like, oh god, I'm gonna need some more.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: And I was like, you know what, I'm going to
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: try and get this tooth out earlier rang them up
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: and they had a cancelation.
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: I just love.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: I love that the only people who can help you
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: were those who have been beaten down by ash Wicks
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: for such a long period since they started this podcast,
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: and they've been copping shot after shot after shot from you,
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: and now now you're on your hands and he's begging.
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: It's a credit to their public service.
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: They could easily just be like, no, this guy obviously
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: doesn't know about that, so foolger.
• 12:01
  Speaker 3: Now I'm like you listen to our podcast.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, He's like, what do you do?
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: And you're like, oh, we have a podcast. It's all
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: about how great dans are. What was the problem with
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: your tooth? It was a I don't know, it just
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: hurt a lot. It's an old feeling tooth. That was
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: so I heard a lot. It was dead dying. No,
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: it was it was irritating the nerves underneath it.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: Right, So the options are roots, options were root canal
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: too expensive.
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: He sat me down, he turned the lights off, he
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: turned the lamp on my face.
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: He said, how badly do you want to keep this tooth?
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: I said, I'm not that attached to it, to be
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: completely honest. It's attached to my head, but I'm not
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: that attached to it emotionally.
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: So let's remove it.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: But because I'm such a scady cat, I was like,
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: can we somehow knock me out? He's like, no, may,
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: It's going to cost you like three or four times, way.
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: More than it'd be such a scady cat, let's just.
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: Rip it out of your head. So you go in
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: and take these three sleeping tablets. I don't know if
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: this is legal. I don't know whether these dancers is
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: really shifting garage, I mean his basement.
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: I'm tired up. I was coming. I got no pants
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: on them. It's necessary and yeah, I think like it's
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: like doesn't put you to sleep, but it makes you
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: git out of it. I was pretty out of it.
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: I'm honest.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: I was really enjoying it. And I actually fell asleep
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: at the lead up and then they woke me up.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: I was like, anyway, so they had to take the
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: tooth out because it was like unless they were to
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: do the root, ca now I'll try and save the tooth.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: Its best to rip it out. Now I'm going to
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: be holding my head.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: May I ask you just really quickly, did you get
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: any second opinion from April in regards to saving the
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: tooth or losing the tooth?
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: Nah? She said get it out. She wanted to get
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: me complaining. She's honestly so over it. She was at
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: the point where I was like, my tooth's like oh,
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: She's like no, actually, that's right. I was in bed
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: and I was like, oh god, I can't get up
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: my mouth. She's just like, you can't decide when it's
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: too sore to get out of bed, when it's too
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: so not to get out of it, so get out
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: of it.
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: And I was like okay. So managed to squeeze in on.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: The Monday, which is two days ago, and I do
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: have a present for you.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: Please are you ready? Oh? It's so big it is
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: my tooth.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: I want to put it as a necklace.
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: I was thinking that money to clean it first. Probably, God,
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: it's so long.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: It's a long tooth. Anyway, there's a hole in my
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: head now, oh.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: My so long. Dude, Hang on a second.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: There's a big black mark in there, isn't there. What's
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: your professional opinion?
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: Oh? Wack? That fucking guy is Yeah, pretty bad.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: What's the black stuff mean?
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: There's a little bit of good in all of us? Yeah?
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: So do you want to keep it? I don't want
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: to take you too.
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: No, it's yours, just to keep. You'll never ever forget me.
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: Thank you. You never forget.
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: Whenever you're facing yourself with a hard decision, look to
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: the tooth. Hold the tooth, hold it, look to it
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: and go what's the right move here?
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: And the tooth will tell you.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: Well, look who it is.
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: Look who come barge? You had one job, don't come
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: in and you've come in? What do you forget?
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: Are the keys?
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: Hey, April, do you love me any less now that
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: I'm less of a man because I'm missing a tooth?
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: That's what you told me last night.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: Hi April?
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: Where are you going?
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: Where are you going?
• 15:24
  Speaker 3: By the way, You're going to Egypt? Very good?
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Is some of your best ways?
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: Is that right? Is that geographically correct?
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: For those of you wonder out of the Cairo and
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: said to Egypt, that's what living with me is like.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: She's not coming back. Can you just open your can
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: I see?
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: I see?
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll get a close up of it.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: So what's the recovery like right now?
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: Yes, that was a bit.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: They stitch it up because no, it's just it's it's
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: a vacant hole.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: I'm listening. Yeah, So they leave it as is for now.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: I've had a few messages from people that are also
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: had theirs out, also criticizing my lack of being able
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: to stay strong against dentists.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: Can I tell you a story just really quickly, really quickly.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: This is in the UK. I lived in London, told
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: us for thirty second. Just for those people who are
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: new to the podcast, I lived in London for four years.
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: You haven't been listening for the last fifteen minutes. A
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: man hasn't told you lived in London for a four
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: months lived.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: It's a great city. I recommend it. If you couldn't
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: call it living for four years, sure, that's that's living.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: I had a passport, that's living.
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: I had a passport. Yeah, an accent.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: I fucking I was in London. Yeah, and my fucking
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: mate was.
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: There.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: Was a friend of ours was a dentist, and you know,
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: as I was still as a dentist, I think I
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: won't say your name Charlotte, it's not Charlotte. And you know,
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: we're talking about what life is like as a dentist.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: And I said, you know, have you ever made a mistake?
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: And she goes, oh, yeah, absolutely. One time she was
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: extracting a tooth and then she extracted the tooth, looked
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: at the X ray and went, oh shit, took the
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: wrong tooth out, wrong side. I was like, I got
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: to take the right tooth out. That person woke up
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: and they said, look, good news, bad news, bad news.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: We found another tooth that also needed to come out.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: The good news is that we took it out. Didn't
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: charge you anything extra because you were under You're welcome
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: and that patient was like, thank you so much. That's
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: so kind of you.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: That's why they marked the leg in surgeries, like we've
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: got to remove a leg. There's one with gangreing, one
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: without gangering. I think the one with gangering, just in case.
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: They've put a cross on this one, so not this one.
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: It's lucky that you got the right tooth out. Yeah,
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: he didn't wake up when you also ash.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: The good news is we've got no but I can
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: see the mistake there because the sea through and I
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: mean all those years of training.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: I love how all of a sudden you're the dentist sympathizer.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: Who would have thought we'd be here?
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: I got a clean while I was there. They outsold me.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: What do you think you're doing? WHOA? Hang on, buddy,
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: we're good friends. Remember it's nerf for nothing. I don't
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: know what you mean. You have an interesting look in
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: your eye.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: Do you know what this is?
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, of course I know what that is. It's it's nerve.
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: It's not any old nerve, Matthew. It's the end series.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: What's the end series?
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: It's extreme.
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: It's got extreme accuracy, speed and distance. This one in
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: particular is actually called a pinpoint large scope. It's the
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: word like it and it's got a ten dark cartridge.
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: See that.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: Can you just relax please when we're doing a podcast,
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: you can relax when you sleep. Speaking of NERF, actually,
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: who do you think would win a battle between the
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: Johnson's or the Wicks?
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: Look, any team that Lowell is in. I'm worried. I'm scared.
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: She's a relegade, she's an animal, she's untrustworthy, and she's
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: so good at gas lighting Pip. She would drag you
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: in with a false sense of security and then bang.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: She's actually got a very good aim on her as well.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: Her hand eye coordination is impeccable.
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: Mike is not so much. Oscar Yes, I reckon he
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: would do all right.
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: He's small, slender, so he'd be able to hide Macy clumsy.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: No, it's not Macy. I'm worried about.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: It's April April with an end series lethless parenting hack.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: I also find the Nerve end series very helpful around
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: the house.
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: What do you mean?
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: Well, when I run a bath and the kids don't
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: get in it, I come after him with a NERF.
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: They get in pretty quick.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: That is very clever.
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: It's really sad to watch Mazie run from me.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: She waddles, enjoying next level play with the all new
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Nerve End series, perfect for active fun. So grab your
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: kids and get out doors for action packed excitement with
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Nerve available now from all leading retailers.
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: And matt Before we get back to the show, well.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: I think we should probably ash if you ash hush
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: as men. As dads, we're very lucky, Ash. We're very
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: lucky in that we're the first generation of dads. Actually,
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: people got very angry when I was like, we're the
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: first generation of hands on parents on mass Do.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: You know who got angry without the people that weren't
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: hands on.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: Well, there was one dad who was like, oh, it
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: was hands on with my kids. I was like, I
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: don't want to know about Like.
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: My dad was hands on?
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: I sweats like, no, he wasn't. So we can go
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: to any kind of environment out of the house, like
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: going grocery shopping with the kids. Other parents look at
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: us emails and they're like, wow, I know the bar's
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: really like boomer mums for example, Like boom mums look
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: at us and like we don't deserve it, But they
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: look at us and they think, gosh, like, what an
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: amazing dad.
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: When we're doing the bare minimum. I take it. Well,
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: I'll take it any day of the week. Little they know,
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: I'm shotting for a boys trip.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: I have found a location where the praise is almost
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: too much.
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: I'm listening.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: So I don't know if you've ever taken Macy to
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: get her nails done.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: No, not yet, dude. I think she's young.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: She's too young.
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: I've seen you do. I've thought about it.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: So I do it to the girls. It's like seven bucks,
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: her kid get nails done and shits still. Now they
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: do the first few. The poor poor guy was like,
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: all right, here we go, last nail, and then Lola
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: would go yeah, move her hands and go fuck startle
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: everygain well there for hours. But I'm telling you, if
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: you feel like maybe there's a day that you're struggling
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: as a parent, you're not doing enough, just take your child,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: go to the nail salon and just the looks of
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: the other women in that nail salon as you're there
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: with your child picking out colors.
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: It's reuseless. It is unfucking believable.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm going.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: To I'm going to go into bat for you here
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: say that that's a very modern man thing for you
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: to do.
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: Like, that's I don't I've never like I always did.
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: I sit there. I sit there and I get ten
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: minutes a piece and quiet whilst my girls get their
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: nails done.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: It's great. So it's like that's top tier dadding, I think.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: Because I've it's you think how you're going to an
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: ail salon, Like what a good dad, what a great
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: guy's standing? Ye're not afraid to do anything that's like
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: you know not you.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: Know, because you get yours done every now and then,
• 22:46
  Speaker 3: don't you. Yeah, I didn't get it done.
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: Should we take all four kids because oscarold be super keen.
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you love it? All four kids, two dads. If
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: there's a nail salon out there that would love us
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: to come and do it, I key for that. Bring
• 23:02
  Speaker 3: bring the family our feet done.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: What about those little fish that eat your feet?
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: That's scamping scam.
• 23:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: So just any any dads out there who are listening
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: and just prepare yourself the absolute onslaught of praise. Like mum,
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: another mom was getting a nails done and she's like,
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: I just think that's so lovely that you're taking your
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: girls here, and I was like, it's no big deal. No,
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: I'm just doing what I can. My my wife's inter
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: state at the moment, so she but that's fine, she's.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: Just trying to put food on the table. But she's
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: also absent.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, someone's going to take them out out right, you know.
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: It's like, it's got me then, who.
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: I'm going to try it. I think we should try it,
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: and we should all do it together.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: Two gay dads, we're not doing Those ladies from the
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: bookstore are like they walk past and they are again,
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: they're lovely. There's two gay dads.
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: They've got four kids between the Oh my goodness, yeah,
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: it's two broken marriages. Mums were absent.
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: Ash. We spoke last week about the new kind of
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: kind of calling in a segment it's called parenting hack
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: of fuck that. It's where we look at a video
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: that's been posted on social media. They're a parent who
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: are suggesting they have an idea, a concept, a way
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: of making parenting groundbreaking, making parenting better or easier.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: And look, honestly, we do come across videos out there
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: that the hack is groundbreaking.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: I had one where I don't know if your kids
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: use it. The little beads that they put on, they
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: place the bead on your shape and your iron the
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: beads and they then make a shape. But they fucking
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: go on the floor all the time. But if you
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: put a sock in the that was good, and then
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: you can you can suck up all the beads and
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: they get stuck in the sock. Job done. Parenting hack absolutely.
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: Last week's fuck that was apparently suggested that you wake
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: up your kids after they've gone to bed to get
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: them a surprise.
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: Moving anyway, they're already awake for majority of the day,
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: have a movie date.
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: So this week sounds great? This week, Ash, I've got
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: a new video.
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: Okay, cool, we'll show me.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: I feel like I've bring nothing to the table. You're
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: the one who's always got there. I promise next week.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: Now, your rage last week was more than a night.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: Rage because I just think it's not fair on the child.
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: I think that's selfish for your own gratitude. But then
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: to be able to post a video about it, like
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: I'm such a great parent, You're a ship parent.
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: Well sorry, well said, that's that's you're filling my cup.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: That's what I wanted, I'm filling your cup with what?
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, Ash, do you think this is a parenting hack
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: or fuck that?
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: Yes, I'm loving this road trips. Am I going in
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: the mindset of road trip?
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: Road trips? Got a big drive ahead of you, asking
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: your kids? Do you need to go the toilet? You don't. Okay,
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: let's get in the car. Let's set off.
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: Okay, we're off, we're driving. I'm watching No. Nope, no no, no, nope,
• 25:55
  Speaker 3: no no, no, no, no, no.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: This is a product you can purchase online, right, So
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: let me just explain what I'm looking at here.
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: It's a product that someone's purchased that unfolds, goes onto
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: the four of the car.
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: It's like a flat pack. Comes as a flat packed
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: cardboard box. Yeah, it looks like there's a plastic liner.
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: It opens up to a potty.
• 26:15
  Speaker 3: So the kid sits on it.
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: That kid's way too big for that partty first of all,
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: and then they shit in it. You wrap it back
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: up and then go on your day. And then what
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: do you do?
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: Dump it in and be okay, what about Ash? Hear
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: me out? Nighttime? Nighttime road trip. You're on the side
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: of a cliff.
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: Why would I be on the side of a cliff.
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: I don't know what you're driving, bro maybe up in
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: the mountains. Maybe it's snowing right, so it's it's hard
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: to then do a bush wheel bush poo. So you
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: need to do that business in a place that's quite
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: close to the car. You don't want to sit next
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: to the car.
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: I think it's demeaning.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: What shitting next to the trees?
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: Not?
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's you're in nature.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: You're in nature, you go care, you go am being
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: really out in the sticks, and that you dig a
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: hole down river.
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: But maybe not upriver? Hey, what about I don't know
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: how long your children take to poo? Mine take a
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: little while? Do they a little while?
• 27:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: Oscaus PSI is unbelievable. Maybe he still shits in nappies.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: But look, I would highly doubt you know how strange
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: kids are. There's a bigger chance of my kids shit
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: doing a bush poo then sitting on what looks to
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: be a magician's.
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: Hat to take a shit.
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: He'd be like, what is as if it's going to
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: support his weight. He'd end up shitting and falling back
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: into it. I think I think someone's tried to cash
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: in to make some money on idiots. That's what I
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: think about that. So it's not a hack. I think
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: the hack is if your kid needs to shit, you pull.
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: Over, find a bush the old fashioned way and go here.
• 27:51
  Speaker 3: I'm watching.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: I'm here to protect you while she poo out here,
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: and then I'll get the wipes, wipe it up. The
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: shit's gone into the soil, perhaps a tree grow. That's
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: a hack. This is not a hack.
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: This is I'm scared that, Mike. I'm trying to protect
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: my kids.
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: It's over complicating a situation.
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: I think.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: Also, it's way too pretty colored. It could be mistaken
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: for one of those gifts bags. Next minute you're given
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: a friend a bag of shit.
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah you need to You need to have the shape
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: and color like shit.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: It needs to be off putting. I think they're trying
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: to cash in on something that's okay, well said, Well,
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: so it's not a hack. It's a fuck that ye first,
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: should we do no before we move on, I've got
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: something really quick for you, please, But I've got something
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: i just want to bring up that I've just stumbled
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: across Matthew Johnson, and I didn't know this you're very
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: humble man, and you haven't brought this to my attention,
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: nor has anybody brought this to my attention until I'm
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: sitting across from you.
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: A man via man, dad via dad. You've been nominated
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: for an award.
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's weird. I didn't know that. I didn't know
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: that I was a scam.
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: I think you've been scam.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: So no, just to give some context of the listeners,
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: matt has been a finalist of the Bawdy Awards.
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: Whatever that is never heard of.
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: It still an honor for a content creator, change maker
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: of the years.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: The weird thing is ash. Weird thing is like, I've
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: not really done anything in the mental health space.
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: But it's it's for children's mental health. For You've done
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: some starlight.
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: Stuff, didn't it.
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but not enough to like you.
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: Do more than what I do. You're up against some
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: pretty heavy competition.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: I don't know how I got nominated, but it's a
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: public vote.
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: It's a public vote, so look listen.
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: No, I mean we need to make sure that Matthew
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: J and I will be plugging this.
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: I'm honored to be nominated, but it's not required. It
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: is required the award the awards are in Brisbane. I'm
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: not flying a Brisbane for the awards. Bring the kids.
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: We just start to go fund me for Matthew. I'm
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: both impressed and proud of you.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: So if you want to go and vote for matt
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: you can at boardy Awards their Instagram pay I'm going
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: to put it on my story.
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: Thank you and every day very kind.
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: Of its announced.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: I appreciate. Now, I don't do this with the recognition ash.
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: So let's go to We're going to do lies. We've
• 30:14
  Speaker 3: got some cracking lies today, so let's get into it.
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: Tell me loude.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: This one's from Tilly.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: Hey Tilly, it's going to get dark real quick, so
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: I would just maybe remove the enthusiasm out of your voice.
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: We can get it back afterwards once we've recovered. My
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: older sister told me my mother was on a business trip.
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: When I was old enough to notice other kids had
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: mum and a dad.
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: I think I was four or five. Bear with me.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: My dad allowed me to believe this rather than explain
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: the concept of death.
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: The mum was dead. I know.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: That is bad parenting. Oh my god, it is like proper.
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: That's a lot dard yea that is. That is one
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: hell of a life. Also just the best case example
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: of boomer parenting.
• 31:10
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, just run with it.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she said, I'm not mad about it.
• 31:15
  Speaker 3: I probably wouldn't have understood the truth anyway. So like
• 31:17
  Speaker 3: she's obviously still very close with her dad.
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: Taking that very well.
• 31:20
  Speaker 3: First of all, sorry about your mum, very sorry. Second
• 31:24
  Speaker 3: of all, it's kind of sad.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Jesus Christ. At what point do you then do you
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: then say sorry, she's not on that sales conference, she's dead.
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: It's kidding, Like, how do you How long was the
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: sales conference? She's been on that conference for years? Yeah?
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: I know? When do you? I suppose like when you're
• 31:48
  Speaker 3: in an age to understand you would just but.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: There's always going to be that period where you're like
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: six or seven and you're still running with the conference
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: business trip line.
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, oh god, just beyond mine.
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: God's say. This one is from Courtney.
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: Hello Courtney, Hello Courtney, Please don't be as morbid.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: I lived in London.
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: For four years.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: That's very good. Close my eyes, it felt like I
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: was right back on Oxford Street.
• 32:19
  Speaker 3: I tell you live in London, Courtney.
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: The lie I told my four year old last week
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: we were at Costco having pizza in the food court
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: delicious and ash and alarm went off in the store.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: My son then asked why it was going off. I
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: told him it goes off when kids are being naughty
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: and don't listen or eat their food. I then watched
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: a parent leaving the store with their child and pointed
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: to them and said to my son, see that kid
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: must have been naughty. They're been taken out of the shop.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: Let's say it worked. He ate his dinner a bit
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: quieter than usual.
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: I love a perfectly timed especially when there's someone and
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: you're like, see.
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: That's him and he's crying. You're like, perfect.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Relie that it's I could easily be the truth because
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: it was in this instance. Before we move on, I've
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: got one that I've been using as I've had my
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: tooth out. Now, I've been using my tooth with Oscar.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: Forget him to brush his teeth properly, because he's not.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: It's not the act of him put getting the toothbrush
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: to his mouth.
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: He just sucks on it. Oh, it's so annoyed.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: They go finished and you go you can't just eat.
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: The tooth properly, do it? Properly.
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and he's on adult toothpaste now because this happened
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: when he got the crown.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the kids stuff wasn't strong enough.
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: No, it's too tasty.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: What was the first few times of him having like
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: a full strength minto clips.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: There was one stage where he had the toothbrush up
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: to his mouth.
• 33:55
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna do it. It's not that bad. So I've
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: been like, I've had a two thousand. So every time
• 34:03
  Speaker 3: now I'm like, do you want to look like this?
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: And this follows with him, It's not this is what
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: you want hold up, grabbing him by the collar, and
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: this could be you get him out of my size.
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: It's not really a lie. It's kind of the truth.
• 34:21
  Speaker 3: That's how it happened to me.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: But it's it's working, and Macy's just equally as terrified.
• 34:28
  Speaker 3: So that's my lie for the week.
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: Perfectly time lies.
• 34:31
  Speaker 3: Perfectly time lies.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we have some questions.
• 34:36
  Speaker 3: We do.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: We have a couple of quick questions.
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: Do you have some questions?
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: This one is from me and she says, I'm returning
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: to work after having my first child and he will
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: soon attend daycare. I feel like I know exactly what
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: your answer will be ash. But she wants to know
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: if it's okay to dress her child in daycare clothes
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: the night before to save morning time the following day.
• 35:03
  Speaker 3: Like you kind of want to what was that noise?
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: You kind of want to give them, like you kind
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: of want to give parents like that as a like
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: you just I'm always like just doing your best. I
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: think it's okay if it's pajama week, pajama day, whatever,
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: because that's just like the best.
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: Week of the year, because it's like after school.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: The rule books out the window.
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: But I get Look, I get it. If you every
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: kid's different. If it's like I always argue with Oskrea
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: in the morning's like get dress and he's too busy
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: doing something else.
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: But if they're dressed before. But also they could smell
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: like sleep, you know what, their kids develop a complex?
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: How old?
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: Well what does sleep smell?
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: Do you know what I'm talking about? Sleep stinks?
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: It's just like this artistic am I.
• 35:48
  Speaker 3: When are you smelling? Sleep? Smells?
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: Like?
• 35:50
  Speaker 3: What this smells like sleep? I don't know. I can't.
• 35:55
  Speaker 3: That's that's the only description I could give you. People
• 35:58
  Speaker 3: know what I'm talking about?
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: Do they?
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: Let's find out if you know what sleep smells like.
• 36:03
  Speaker 3: Let us know. I've never smelled sleep.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: I'll smell yourself, my friend, because you stink. It also
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: depends how old the kid is.
• 36:12
  Speaker 4: I must be a year old. This kid still a
• 36:15
  Speaker 4: baby's still be so okay, there is. It goes against
• 36:20
  Speaker 4: the grain. It goes against what we've been taught. Okay,
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: you go to bed, you wear pajamas. You wake up,
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: you wear your daytime clothes. I do have a friend
• 36:28
  Speaker 4: dead child used to be really tricky in the morning
• 36:31
  Speaker 4: to get dressed. They then used to pick out the
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: clothes the night before and put them to the side,
• 36:36
  Speaker 4: so in the morning, they're like, the clothes are right there,
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: we'll get dressed over time. He would then get so
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: excited because he picked out his clothes at nighttime, he'd
• 36:44
  Speaker 4: want to start wearing them right he Now he goes
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: to bed wearing the clothes for the following day.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: He also wears socks and shoes to bed, and she
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: tries to when he's asleep. She tries to take the
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: shoes off him, and he's like, I.
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: Got ja, what do you think you do? I got
• 37:05
  Speaker 3: a backflip play on.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: I think like I was being a bit harsh. I
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: think do your best, that's it. I don't want parents
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: to feel like I'm judging them on that or making
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: them feel bad. So I would say, if it helps
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: you play on, do it, do it. Do it feels natural?
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: What's your question?
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: My question comes off the back of something I heard.
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: It was a question that we did get asked by
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: an anonymous There's a particular radio station in the mornings
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: here sometimes they do afternoon shifts.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: Fitting Whipper and Kate.
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: Richie Wople were talking about people.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Was talking about the city of the Surf which we did,
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: which we did, and he was talking about his kids
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: were saying, hey, can we run on ahead? And he
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah, fine, go ahead, And his wife said,
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: are you an idiots? And there's this ninety thousand people
• 37:57
  Speaker 2: here and he's like, the joke's on you.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: I've air tagged kids.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: So then we also had a question to come is
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: it okay to track your kids?
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: I'm really torn by this one. I'm really torn ash.
• 38:11
  Speaker 3: Whether it's against their will or their knowledge or not.
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: I think I think there's no harm. There's no harm
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: in letting the kids know that they've got a track
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: to say, track track track sounds very hunting. Is it
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: okay to track and hunt your children?
• 38:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: On a deserted island, I think. Imagine this. Imagine at
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: the shopping center you lose oscar, right you cannot find him.
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: Imagine if you thought to yourself, like, if only I
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: had put a little tracker in his shoe, you know,
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: if someone has taken him, we could find him right now.
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: Very true.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: And you know, for the sake of like wanting to
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: have consent from your five year old kid, because I
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: think morally there's that question of like do I need
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: them to consent to being tracked or not? I think
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: when they're four or five, you don't need that level
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: of consent because they don't know any guess.
• 39:13
  Speaker 3: They're old enough to consent. That was like, yeah, okay,
• 39:15
  Speaker 3: because it's just going to think it's cool they have
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: magic shoes.
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: You're like, have magic shoes that allow mom and dad
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: to find out where you are?
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: Will that make them wander off more? Though they know
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: they'd be like, well, mum can track me. I don't
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: think we are equipped to give the correct answer.
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: First of all, I.
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: Think you can track them up to twelve, Okay, up
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: until twelve they're trackable without consent.
• 39:38
  Speaker 3: I know it's a scary one to think.
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: I think, if I'm going to track my kids, I'm
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: going to have the conversation with mum as well, right.
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: I think. But there's no there's no malice intent with
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: one of to track your kids. And that's why I
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: think it's okay if your kid is like fourteen or
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: fifteen and you're like, I don't know, they're trying to
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: let them live.
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: Let them live their lives. They're going to make the mistakes.
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, but obviously you cannot track other adults.
• 40:06
  Speaker 3: I know you are. It's all a bit ecky for me.
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: I'm just going to say it.
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: I think for the safety wise, like you said, Okay,
• 40:14
  Speaker 2: I see that, But at the same time, it's just
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: something about it gives me the yick.
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: Yes, I can appreciate that, man, but I'm going to
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: get some apple tagic.
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: I'm not going to sit here and say what we
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: did was wrong.
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: Okay, I think micro chipping, we're not there yet.
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: What he did wasn't wrong. I think what was wrong
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: about what he did is that his wife didn't know.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: She may have loved that he was being proactive.
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: Maybe I don't know what their relationships like, but I
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: just think that if you're going to be if we
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: talk about parenting, trying to be a united front. If
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: I'm turning around, if my wife's turned around to me saying,
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: are you a freaking idiot?
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: You're going to lose the kids you like? Jokes on you?
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: They're air tagged perfect, that's my answer.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: I want to brand my children.
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: Back in the old days. You'd be like, please return to.
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: I don't hate the idea, but I do agree. I'd
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: probably have to flag.
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: It with Laura, who knows as well. Who can tap
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: into that tracking device? That's another thing.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: If you can with with payWave now you can walk
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: past someone and they can take your card. Maybe if
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: they can pick up an air tag, that that kid's
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: air tag, let's fucking follow him home.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: Cas, you're another question? Is the world flat or round?
• 41:28
  Speaker 3: Are you? I'm not a conspiracist, are you? No?
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying people are tracking. Did man land on
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: the moon? That's the next question.
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: Please don't belittle my opinions. I think it'd be sad.
• 41:44
  Speaker 3: I appreciated this.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: I'm going to any serious, any serious answers to anything
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: moving forward.
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: Is that what you wanted from this?
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: I appreciate it and if you have appreciated this episode,
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: please subscribe.
• 41:55
  Speaker 3: Don't view exit music.
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: I need to get out of this house. Ash is
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: wearing an Alfoyle hat right now because because they're all listening,
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: and send it to anyone else who think we'll enjoy
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: listening to us talking about tagging kids and also any questions,
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: any lies.
• 42:14
  Speaker 3: Play tag wild for research.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm just saying, maybe you shouldn't tag your kids,
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: but what you should do is buy them what people
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: are calling the best book ever written for kids. Two
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: Doting Dads the question three times.
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: I think it's Amazon.
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: It's like twelve bucks, also twelve bucks maybe online.
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: Best.
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: We've written a book that I'm sure you've heard us
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: talk about many times. It's one that the kids will
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: like and hopefully the adults will also enjoy it as well. Agreed,
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: it's not a book about two go dads. That's our
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: adults only.
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: We'll go to get out of here, Bye bye, Yeah,
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: keep going. Yep, are I'm alive?
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: There is.
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea, and community.
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present,
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land.