Latest / Two Personal with Joy Taylor / Midterms Are Over, Now What? Church Men, Cheating Tells & the Height Debate

Transcript

Midterms Are Over, Now What? Church Men, Cheating Tells & the Height Debate · Two Personal with Joy Taylor

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Got to break free obama was surprised at my height
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: sometimes you think about the things that you have done
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: to like impress a man oh my god the hair
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: on my arms is standing up be good because i
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: can see that you're a good person we used to
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: live normal lives i'm neither riding nor dying the fucking
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: cia okay and got shit on me all right.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: What's up, everyone? Welcome to Two Personal.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: I'm Joy Taylor, alongside Haley and Spex, and we are
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: back in the studio.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: Yes, finally.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: For now.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: It's been a minute.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: I have been on the road for a month.
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: That's a long time.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: I was not in LA for a month.
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: And not just in one place.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: No, I was in multiple places, changing hotels. I was
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: shooting a show, which I will reveal on a later date,
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: but it's very exciting. I can't give you any details,
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: but we're shooting a show. And then I went to
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Miami and did the One Voyage Cruise with Urban One Podcast,
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: who of course is our two personal podcast homes. As
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: well as The Daily Play. And that was really fun.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Got to go to one of my favorite places in
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: the world, which is Bimini in the Bahamas. So that
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: was great.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: And, of course, you'll notice our beautiful balloons.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: Because I was gone, so we didn't get to celebrate
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: our 50th episode.
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: So exciting. I don't know how that went so fast.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: So this is technically episode 57 or this will be 58?
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: This will be 58. This will be 58. So, but
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: we wanted to do balloons for the 50th. So here
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: they are. And yeah, there's a new Reptile City episode
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: out for the Bay. The Valkyries are WNBA champions. How's
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: it feel to have a WNBA champion in your hometown?
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I was very into it.
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: We're going to a game next year.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Have to.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: We're going to Valhalla.
• 1:56
  Speaker 3: I can't believe I haven't gone.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: No, we're going.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: We're going because it looks so fun.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: So fun.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: And everyone I talked to, and you'll see it in
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: the episode, just talked about how like fun it is. Yeah.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: Going to games is and how it's how it was
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: at Oracle before they moved to their to for the
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: Warriors moved to their new arena, not in Oakland. So, yeah,
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: I've been very, very busy. Yesterday was election day. I
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: see you have your sticker on for voting. Yeah, I voted.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: Very proud.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Proud. Good.
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: Proud of you. Because listen.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: There's a lot to answer. They ain't going to take
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: us out without a little fight, okay? Listen, I voted
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: by mail, as I always try to do, because it's
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: very convenient.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: And I need a lot of time. This ballot, I
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: will say.
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  Speaker 3: I wasn't ready for that.
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  Speaker 2: This ballot in LA was like nine pages.
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  Speaker 1: It took me like three hours, because I'm not one
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: of those people that just like looks up a voting
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: guide and votes like just off of party. I like
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: to read what I'm actually voting for.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: So it took.
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: And you voted every single.
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  Speaker 1: A very long time.
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  Speaker 3: Because you know, some people skip.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I understand. Like, if you don't know what
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: you're voting for... I definitely skipped a few. I mean,
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: all of the.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: Propositions were very important. But I... Yeah, that's why I
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: like to fill out the ballot. Because I want to
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: do the research on what it is that I'm voting for.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: And, you know, the local election stuff is very important.
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  Speaker 1: That actually affects your life and where your taxes go for.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Where you live.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: So, yeah. Congratulations to everyone who voted. You did exactly
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: what the fuck you're supposed to do.
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: It's your first time voting. Welcome to the crew.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: And yeah, it's going to be a wild week finding
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: out who is in charge of the next two years
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: of the country. And if we're going to get any
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: control back from this psychopathic, fat, farting loser that.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: Currently runs our country.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: At this point, I honestly do think it is pure delusion. And.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Just nonsense that anyone would still support him. Like I,
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: it's gotten to the point where it's like, you're just,
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: the cult thing I've always felt like was very unhelpful
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: when talking to people who were MAGA, because when you,
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: when you say things like that to someone, then they
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: just kind of default to protecting themselves. But now it's
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: at the point where it's like, okay, well, I don't
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: know what else to tell you. You are in a cult.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: You've got to break free.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: All of my vocal stems are firing this week.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: Like, it's so bad.
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  Speaker 3: By the time this comes out, Election Day will have passed, right?
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: So I feel like we've spent months and months and
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: months telling people the importance of voting. You need to vote.
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: This is our time to sway this way or that way. Correct.
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: But what are we doing when the election is over?
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: Because I feel like once elections finish, nobody... I'm not
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: going to say everybody, but a lot of people just...
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: think that that's all. I don't have to care anymore.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: I have to keep up on it. I have to
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  Speaker 3: keep educating myself. But things are still happening. Things are
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: still going on. So how much attention do you feel
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: that we should be paying attention to government after elections
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: have passed?
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: Well, I think everyone does need a break at some point.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: You know, I do think you need to unplug. And,
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: you know, once the elections are over and the consequences
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: of those elections start getting implemented and you know, it's
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: not that you should ever tune out from what's happening
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: in the world, but listen, like the holidays are coming again.
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: There's a lot of shit going on in the world.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: You are, I think you can be permitted to turn
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  Speaker 1: your brain off to certain things.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: And in the past you used to be able to
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: do that.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: That I think is probably one of the more frustrating
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: things about this new political era is that kids will
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: never understand what it was like to not have to
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: say the president's goddamn name every single day. We used
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: to live normal lives. Like go to work, go to school,
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: talk about things other than racism and misogyny and red
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: pill bullshit and hating women and hating men and hating
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: dating and the fucking gas prices and Iran and the
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: straight of Hormuz. Like we used to not have to
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: talk about this shit. We would talk about it when
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: things happened. And we'd have real conversations. And when election
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: time kicked up, we would all pay attention.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: And then we would go vote. And then we would
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: live our lives.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: And that's actually how it's supposed to be. Politicians are
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: supposed to do their fucking jobs. They're not supposed to
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: be celebrities. They're not supposed to be running around giving
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: their fuck-ass opinion on everything on social media. They're not
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: supposed to be insulting reporters and causing constant problems and
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: spending money on fake wars. And.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: All of the bullshit that has been going on. There
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: was a time we didn't used to live like this.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: So I do think it's fair that people regulate their
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: nervous systems enough to try and enjoy life without dealing
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: with these fucking psychopaths. Unfortunately, a great deal of our
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: community in this country really likes racism and bullshit. So
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: they put us in this position by voting for this
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  Speaker 1: piece of dog shit. So we are in this situation.
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  Speaker 1: So I do think it's fair to take a break. However,
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  Speaker 1: this is just the midterms. You got like nine months
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: and then they're going to start cranking this shit up
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  Speaker 1: to a thousand. We're going to find out if this
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  Speaker 1: motherfucker has any plans of leaving office or if we
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: have to have a literal civil war. We're going to
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: find out if we're going to be in war, if
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: we are actually going to activate this situation in the
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: Middle East, which will be an absolute complete nightmare for
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: everyone and could escalate into a full scale, actual boots
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: on the ground situation. We're going to find out a lot.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: We're going to find out if they plan on even
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: listening to Congress anymore because they've talked about that as well.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: So we'll get a little reprieve. And then when things
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: start ratcheting up, for the presidential election it's gonna get
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: you think it's bad now this is the midterms this
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: next presidential election if we are all alive to see
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: it will be one of the more psychotic chapters of
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: all of our lives if you think you're exhausted now
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: just you wait just you wait it's going to be
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: insane yeah we a book chapter right now for sure
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: oh yeah yeah yeah it's finna get real Yeah, we
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: live in real book times.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: Now, will they have books then? Don't know.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: But if they do, we are going to be a
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: chapter because that shit is going to be bonkers for sure.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: It's going to get real fucking weird. Now, I remain
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: slightly optimistic that they have truly fucked this shit up
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: so badly that, and will continue to because they're going
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: to get desperate. that come the presidential election, if he
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: does make any kind of notion or nod to him
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: not leaving office, which of course is not allowed. We
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: don't have kings. We have a democracy. But if you recall,
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: the last time he needed to leave office, he encouraged
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: a coup. And instead of lining those traitors up and
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: blowing their fucking heads off like we should do, We didn't.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: And he pardoned most of them. And we all went
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: back to life as normal and elected him again.
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: So I don't know.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: After January 6th, I have zero confidence that the transition
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: of power from him to who will very likely be
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: a Democratic president will be smooth or without violence at all.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Because it wasn't last time. Last time they were going
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: to hang Mike Pence.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: Oh, my gosh.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: They were going to hang the vice president.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: Who was Trump's vice presidents.
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  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: They went there to kill Congress. Thank God, I guess
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: that one, one officer happened to be standing there and
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: let all their dumb asses down another hallway. Okay.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: Cause they were marching there to kill them. That was
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: their plan.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: It was foiled by one police officer telling them to
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: go another way. I don't, I actually don't think like we,
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: when we talk about January 6th, it's become such a conservative,
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: like brush over talking points. When that was happening, I
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: was like, Oh God, we're no longer a democracy. Like
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: we are like a, all of these countries that we
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: see people come into power and not leave. Like the
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: fact that, that a group of psychopathic fucking cheese puff
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: eating sugar, sody pop drinking fucking losers storms, the United
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: States Capitol with the intention of killing the, our country's
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: leaders and hanging our vice presidents, violently attacking the police
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: officers at our nation's capital, charging in and desecrating those
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: buildings to protest Trump leaving office. to overthrow the governments,
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: and we do not treat them like traitors, all of
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: those people, if they are alive, which I believe that
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: the punishment for treason is death, if they're alive, every
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: single one of them should be in fucking prison for
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: the rest of their lives. And whilst I don't believe
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: we should be keeping people alive in prison who will
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: die there for a variety of reasons, not in every
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: single case, of course, those people in any other country
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: would be dead. In any self-respecting government in any other
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: developed country, those people would be dead or in prison
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: for the rest of their fucking lives. But we are
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: a bunch of pussies, so we don't do shit. And
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: whether you are conservative or whether you are progressive or
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: you are liberal or you're independent, your opinion on people
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: violently trying to overthrow the United States government should be
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: across the board the same.
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: No, thank you. However, we're not there anymore.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: So yeah, I do not have high hopes for how
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: the next presidential election will go. Since the last time,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: it was a fucking shit show. Anyone who doesn't take
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: January 6th as seriously as I do when knowing the
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: details of it is someone that I genuinely consider to
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: be a traitor to the United States of America. Because
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: as someone who loves this country, whose family across the
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: board served this country... who has voted in every single
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: election I have been legally old enough to vote in,
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: who's obviously very closely paid attention to politics for most
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: of my life. There's definitely been chapters where I was like,
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: I'm going to just be a kid and have a
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: nice time. The fact that we are okay with what
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: happened on January 6th completely changed my viewpoint on how
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: everything is run in this bitch. I never genuinely thought
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: I would ever see that in my life.
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: Because I was wild.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: They tried to overthrow the fucking government. I don't know.
• 13:35
  Speaker 5: I can't.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: I'm like, when we talk about it, is that not
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: wild to anybody? Like, what?
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: How are these people not all in prison?
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: Because we live in a fucking joke.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: They tried to hang the vice president. Who was Trump's
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: vice president? Y'all don't stand for shit. Pussies. Y'all don't
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: stand for fucking nothing. It's so weird to me. Well,
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: I mean, I will die on that hill. It's crazy
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: to me. They had a noose.
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, listen. Once we get through these midterms, I
• 14:12
  Speaker 3: definitely need a break.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Take a break.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: And you know what? You should take a break.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: Because as I've just outlined, it's going to get funky.
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: Okay?
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: In here. The next go is going to be Wizdy Wild.
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: I want to get into this height conversation that I've
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: been seeing online.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: Height?
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: Height.
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: Height.
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: So I saw there was a recent viral threats post.
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: Someone wrote, if a man is between six foot four
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: and six foot ten, please let the tall girls have him.
• 14:45
  Speaker 3: You are not a part of the tall girl club.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: I am very much not a tall girl.
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: How does that make you feel?
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: I'm an actual short girl.
• 14:52
  Speaker 4: I am.
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: And I've been fighting this label my whole life.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: I've, you know, I've maybe exaggerated a time or two
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: and said that I was 5'3. But I am actually 5'2.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: And that is a small person. I mean, I'm pretty short, too.
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: That is a short person. How tall are you?
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: 5'4.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: No, I think 5'4 is average. I think 5'4 is
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: in the average range.
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: Just the two inches more?
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it makes a difference.
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: It does.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: I'm very, very short and I get it a lot
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: because I appear very tall on all of my, you know,
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: media platforms. And when I was doing network, I, they
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: purposely give you like a big cushion so that your,
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: your torsos can kind of line up. Yeah. Like your
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: belly buttons kind of line up at, on the desk
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: so that you don't look insanely short.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: So while the guys were sitting in regular chairs, I
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: was like dangling.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: I'd have to have like a really, really high Apple box,
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: which is like this box that they use for a
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: variety of reasons on sets. And I would like put
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: my feet on there. It was a spectacle to get
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: me to the height that was needed. But that's why people,
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: when they meet me, I hear it constantly when people
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: meet me for the first time.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: They're like, wow, I thought you were so much taller.
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: That makes sense.
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: Obama was surprised at my height.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: He was like, why are you so short? Your brother
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: is so tall. Why are you so short? It's a
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: fair question.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, I'm very much part of the short girls club.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: But I will say as a short girl, I do
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: not hunt for tall men.
• 16:20
  Speaker 3: Just taller than you?
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Taller than me, but I feel like that's fair. However,
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: I will date a short man.
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: What if he's five foot?
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: Taller than me.
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: No matter what?
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, taller than me.
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: I feel like that's fair.
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: Threshold.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: Threshold is taller than me. Okay.
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: At 5'2.
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: You said to make that very clear.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: But like a man.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: Who's 5'6 is four inches taller than me.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: Right. For most women, that is incredibly short. Like I've
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: dated a man who's 5'7.
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: My dad's like 5'10. Isn't that like the average?
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: 5'10 is an average height for a man. I'm saying,
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: I don't think you're listening to me.
• 16:56
  Speaker 4: 5'7.
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: So three inches taller than me.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 17:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's not very tall.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: Not very tall, no. No, 5'7 is below average for men.
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: I would be taller than that person in a heel.
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: But I don't care about the heel thing. And here's
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: the thing about short men. Short men tend to be
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: very grateful. Okay.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: They have great faces.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: This is true.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: And also tend to dress very well.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: I find.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: So they pour their efforts into things they can control.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: Correct. They're clean, you know, get their haircuts. And as
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: a short person, like, I don't know. I just don't really.
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: Taller than me is just fine. Like, that's fine for me.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: I don't I don't need a tall man. That being said,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: I've dated multiple men who were six, nine.
• 17:51
  Speaker 3: But did you enjoy that?
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: That's six, nine.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: Well, one was six.
• 17:54
  Speaker 4: 11, actually.
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: Was he 6'11? 6'11?
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: He's basically a footer.
• 17:59
  Speaker 3: He's an athlete.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but not a professional athlete. Like, this was a
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: long time ago.
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: 6'11 is wild.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: Don't get crazy.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: It's not who you think it is.
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: And then, yeah, 6'9. But it is, like, that height
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: difference does create some complications.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like doorways, beds?
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: No, no, no.
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: I'm saying, like, for me.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Laying down, you're all the same height. But
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: it does make things kind of complicated, yeah. I think
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: that's too tall for me.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: 6'9 is very tall. That's a very, very, very, very,
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: very tall man.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: But the idea in that tweet that you are not supposed, like,
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: I'm not supposed to date a tall man just because
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: he likes me is very funny to me. Like, what
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: do you mean? Also, in my experience, the tall men
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: that I have dated like short girls. They don't want
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: to date a tall girl.
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: Well, then that sucks for the tall girls. And that's
• 18:59
  Speaker 3: probably why she wrote that.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: It does suck for the tall girls. But what am
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: I supposed to do about it? She's probably tall. I'm
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: required to be like, no, I want to save you
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: for a tall woman out there. Like, what the fuck
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: does that even mean? And two of my closest friends
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: are 5'11 and 5'10. Yeah. Two of my friends from
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: high school. So I have experienced the dating woes of
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: tall girls before.
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: Same via them.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: And at their heights, I'm with them on the, like,
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: I've never tried to pitch them on dating shorter than them.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Now I have said like, look, six foot might just have,
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: you might have to deal with six foot because you're,
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: you're really limiting your options here. He is technically taller
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: than you at six foot. And for them, like, that's
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: not that much taller than them. But you know, I'm like, listen, girls,
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: there's only so many humans that are male that are
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: over six feet tall.
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: Like that's not a lot.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: It's not a lot. And then, when you're talking about
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: you want to want them more than six feet tall
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: like you want six two and above now you're really
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: getting into it and then you have to keep in
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: mind a lot of women do prefer taller men so
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: you're competing with everyone everyone and that you know and
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: those men are not required to like you just because
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: you're tall and So I've had this conversation so many
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: times because I have a lot of tall girlfriends, not
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: just those two. I have other girlfriends who are on
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: the taller side, like five, let's call it five, seven, five, eight.
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: And I've had real conversations with them.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: Like, Hey girl, you, you, I'm not saying you need
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: to change your preferences or you've got to compromise, but
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: you might want to start looking into the five 11s,
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: six feet tall men, because you're getting really specific here. Like,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: You're not actually technically a tall woman. You're an average
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: height woman. And the whole thing about like, I want
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: to be taller than him in heels thing has always
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: been weird to me.
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: Is it?
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: So why can't you guys be the same height? Like
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: you don't live your life in heels.
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: This is true.
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: So like, why does he need to tower over you?
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: And I get the feeling of like wanting to feel
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: small and, you know, protected and all that. I understand
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: that because I'm not dating a man who's 5'2 either.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: But I also don't need, you know, Goliath.
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, nor do I. I don't want that. I'm cool with,
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: I'm six foot, got a six foot one-er. Perfect for me.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but even that's, that's tall, Haley.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: Like there's a lot of, that's not that, that's above
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: average height for a man. Yeah.
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: I think I'm just used to it.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: Here's the thing about the height thing. And this, listen.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: All right, I want to be very specific when I
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: say this here.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: Because you know how I feel about this.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: This is not a male-centered statement. You couldn't find a
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: less male-centered person than me. Other than the fact that
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: I'm constantly talking about how terrible they are.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: As a woman, if.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: You have a specific physical preference that you refuse to
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: move off of, like you are a woman who's like,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: I will not date a man who is shorter than this. Mm-hmm.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: I do think at some point you need to understand
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: that you are significantly limiting your options.
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: Like you are.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: That doesn't mean that you won't one day meet your
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: tall king.
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: But you will be competing with everyone because let's just
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: say most women prefer tall men. Mm-hmm. Then you want
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: to get into other specifics. He's got to be tall.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: He's got to have good teeth. He's got to have
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: good hygiene. He's got to make this amount of money.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: He's got to like all those other things that fall under, like,
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: it's not just tall, you know? So yeah, you're getting very,
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: very specific hunting for this unicorn, which I hope that
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: you find. And I don't suggest that anyone move off
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: of what they want when it comes to dating.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: I am five foot two. So the world is my oyster.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: You know, I understand I'm God's favorite and that's, you know, no,
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: I've always wanted to be taller. I was an athlete,
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: so that would have served me better. And like, I
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: wouldn't mind three more inches, but here I am. And like, yeah,
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to not date a man that's six, nine,
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: because there's tall girls out there that also want to
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: date him.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: What the fuck kind of sense does that make?
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: She was standing on that.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: And she got dragged for it. Cause it sounds silly
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: as hell.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: I get it. It is hard to find a tall
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: man that checks a bunch of boxes.
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: And then that tall man also has to want you.
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: Specs, how tall are you?
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: I'm 5'9.
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: How do you feel as a 5'9? I mean... Do
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: you consider yourself tall?
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: Average?
• 23:45
  Speaker 4: I consider myself average.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: But Specs feels kind of tall to me. I'm going
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: to stand next to Specs. Specs, stand up.
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: I got sneakers on, but, yeah. So do I.
• 23:57
  Speaker 4: Oh, then there you go.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: But, like, Specs is a whole, like, I have a
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: butt on.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: Specs is a.
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: Whole head taller than me. Yeah, it's not, it's not.
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: A whole head taller than me.
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: Now, here's, I'm gonna crease my sneakers, but, here's me
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: in heels.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Like, these heels. Yeah. Like, what the fuck kind of
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: heels am I wearing?
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: I'm wearing stripper heels, like, ten inches tall?
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's not a big deal.
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: Like, three inches.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's a big deal.
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 24:16
  Speaker 5: I honestly don't care. As somebody that played basketball, like,
• 24:21
  Speaker 5: not collegiate basketball, but I played against players that was, like,
• 24:23
  Speaker 5: that played, like, d1 d2 like i used to practice
• 24:26
  Speaker 5: with them and all that stuff like that like i
• 24:29
  Speaker 5: like height just stopped mattering for me after some time
• 24:34
  Speaker 5: so like.
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: Do you pay attention to it when you when you're.
• 24:36
  Speaker 5: Dating sometimes i'm not gonna lie sometimes i do i'm
• 24:41
  Speaker 5: a person that hates the apps so i kind of
• 24:43
  Speaker 5: do some math i'm like i probably got like Just
• 24:46
  Speaker 5: on average, I probably got like.
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: A three inch like range of like, you know what
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: I'm saying? Like, I know I'm 5'9.
• 24:53
  Speaker 5: So if I see 5'6, I'm like, all right, I'll
• 24:56
  Speaker 5: shoot this shot. If I see 5'8, like, I'm like,
• 25:01
  Speaker 5: I'll still shoot this shot. Now, I have dated women
• 25:04
  Speaker 5: taller than me. I mean, I had no choice when
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: I was like in middle school. But after then, I
• 25:08
  Speaker 5: dated a girl that was.
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: Like six feet tall. Like, no shoes on, six feet tall.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but see, I don't feel like men care as much.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: And I always bring up models because I always see
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: models with shorter men. Now, they're usually extremely wealthy, but
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: which gives you like a couple inches.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: But yeah, like I mean, think of.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: Like actors and stuff like actors are generally not tall men.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: It's true. This is true.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: I mean, they'll be very good looking men, but they're
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: not usually very tall.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: This is true because when I see them in person,
• 25:39
  Speaker 3: just how when people see you in person, they're like, oh,
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: I thought they were taller.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because the women that they are standing next to
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: are small and also not tall as well. So, like, it's...
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: The one thing I will say as a five-foot tour,
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: when girls my height are like, I want to date
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: a man who's less than 6'1. I'm like, girl, you
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: sound kind of silly. I mean, again, I don't try
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: to tell people what their dating preferences should be. And
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: when it comes to this particular physical thing... I'm like,
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: I guess I get it. But like for the short girls,
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: I think it's kind of weird. I do think it's
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: kind of weird because you don't need to be 6'1
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: to tower over someone who's my height.
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: As I just showed you.
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: So that part, I'm kind of like, yeah, you can
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: sound a little silly. But however, Spexy, tell me how
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: you feel about this. Because I kind of, I kind
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: of like it. I don't know. All right. If women
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: can have this one particular physical preference, which we have
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: all normalized.
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: Uh-huh, yeah.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: When the men talk about a physical preference on weight,
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: I kind of can't be mad.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: Although you can change your weight.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: I kind of can't be mad.
• 26:55
  Speaker 5: I understand why you wouldn't be mad.
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: But also, men be lyin'..
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: Men lie about everything, specs. But what I'm saying is,
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: but also I think women, I think not all women,
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: but I think a lot of women lie about this
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: as well. Because again, if.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: A billionaire with a good face, right?
• 27:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: I mean, okay. I mean, you want to talk about
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: a unicorn. I don't, I can't even, I cannot think
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: of one. A billionaire with a good face is, and
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: he's rocking a solid 5'8. is spin at you you're
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: going to make the exception baby okay you're going you're
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: going to get that bunker every time so now these
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: are extreme extreme outliers right obviously which is why I
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: don't even bother to bring them up because most people
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: most women are not going to make that much of
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: an exception on height if they really care about it
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: but I think from I think men have some pretty
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: strong physical and it might not be weight it might
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: be like blondes or.
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: Like Men definitely have particulars that they want.
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Like they might not want to date a woman
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: that's six foot two.
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: There is some height.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So like there are some things on there that
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: I think men feel very strongly about as well. But
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying like as women, you know, fighting for equality,
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: I do feel like if we are going to be
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: this accepting of the height preference being a normalized accepted thing,
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: we gotta, we gotta give them something. The only thing
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: I won't accept is race. You start talking about you
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: don't date black women, blah, blah, blah. They going in
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: the pit. Yeah, that's nasty. Yeah, they going in the
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: pit for sure. If you guys don't know what I'm
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: talking about, I have a extermination pit. I have a
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: mass execution pit that I'm running up when I get power.
• 28:41
  Speaker 4: Think over the world.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, them ones is going in the pit.
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: 300 kicks.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: For sure, Sparta. Yeah, I don't know.
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: What do you think about it, Haley?
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: You think it's ridiculous?
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: I haven't had to seek out a type since I
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: was very young.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: But even when I was young and dating, I just,
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: I never had a type. Like, if you lined up
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: all of the five people I dated before I was
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: with my partner I'm with now, they're all so different.
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: Like, they're not, they don't fall into any category of
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: a type. So I think I just was, if I
• 29:17
  Speaker 3: was single today, I think I'd be the same way.
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think also the height thing.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: It's like I feel like you are allowed one physical
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: preference thing. But when people talk about dating and they
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: start listing all of these superficial preferences and don't mention
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: personality type. or morals or you know things that actually
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: matter that's what I'm kind of like yeah you're getting
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: what you deserve I don't know you need to have
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: preferences that are on the inside and especially when it
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: comes to men yeah and you haven't listed those So
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: I'm kind of skeptical of your whole process. And that's
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: when I really stop listening to them and don't have
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: any sympathy for them. Cause like, girl, you're focused on
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: things that are like the 15th or 16th thing you
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: should be listening when you're talking about what you're looking
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: for in a partner. Actually, we are going to have
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: an episode coming up where we talked to Tasia, who
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: is a.
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: Dating coach.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: And we talked to her on the one voyage cruise.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: And I don't want to ruin the whole conversation, but
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: we talked about one of the things that is constantly
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: coming up around me, which is Christianity and religion and
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: how I avoid men of God.
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: Like the plague.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: And, you know, it became a real point of discussion
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: with the crowd because, you know, it's a thing people
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: care about.
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: And.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: I feel like Loki, they were on my side, but
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: she stood her ground on it. And I will say
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: like the one point that she made, and again, I
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: don't want to ruin the whole conversation because I want
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: you guys to watch the episode. But the one point
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: Tazia made was that she's like, this is a very
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: important thing in my life. So I don't want to
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: compromise on that because I need that to be a
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: part of my life. I need someone who wants to
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: go to church. I need someone who wants to raise
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: our kids a certain way. I need somebody who wants
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: to pray. And I was like, you know what? I
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: feel you on that because I don't want somebody who
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: wants to go to church. I don't have, I don't
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: want kids to even raise a certain way. And I
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: am not praying with you. You're not praying with them.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: I mean, in a time of crisis, you know, I'll, I'll,
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: I'll do the performance art, but like, I am no,
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: like I had a man once.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: Sometimes you think about the things that you have done
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: to like impress a man. Oh my God. The hair
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: on my arms is standing up. I can't believe I
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: did this. So it.
• 31:54
  Speaker 4: Was COVID.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: So like, I really can't be judged. I don't judge
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: anyone for anything that happened during COVID. Like we were
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: locked down. We were not making good decisions. Me personally,
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: I was having a lot of issues with my mental health. Damn,
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: I forgot to take my pill today. I'll get to
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: that later. Anyway, he, like think of me, all right?
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: Think of the person that you both know. And he
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: really made me read the Bible with him on FaceTime.
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: And I really did that shit.
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: For how long? How much of the Bible?
• 32:24
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: It was like a Bible study.
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: I hate that for me.
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: Not Bible study.
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: I hate that for me.
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: Did you enjoy it at the time?
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: No. No!
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: Did you act like you enjoyed it?
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: Yes!
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: And he was probably loving it.
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: It's your mic on specs. You're howling. Of course.
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: Listen, he thought he found his wife.
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: Was it just one time?
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: No, he was always reading the Bible.
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: Certain day of the week? Once a week? Thursdays? Six o'clock?
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: Thursday, six o'clock Bible study. Listen, I tried. I tried
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: my best. That's okay.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: You know what?
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: That is a very actually normal thing to do.
• 33:12
  Speaker 4: I think.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: No, it's not.
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: It's not, and it's, and I'm not saying Bible study
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: is not a normal thing to do. I think if
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: you are into that, be into that. Like, that's your thing.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: I'm with you. Like, that's your business. And you should
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: find somebody who wants to do that. But my thing is,
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: that same man was not living... Oh, that life. So
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: it's like, that's my problem.
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: So you didn't mention that part.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's always the same. Actually, now that I think
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: about it, all the men that I have gone to
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: church with.
• 33:47
  Speaker 3: She's she's done Bible studies back. She's going to church dates.
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: She was like, we learned a lot today.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: Well, there was a time there was a time where
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: I did think that like I did want a Christian man.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: I was like, you know what? Maybe maybe a man
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: who is Christian will be better wrong. Matter of fact,
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: a girlfriend of mine.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: Texted me this yesterday.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to read it. She said, I didn't
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: say nothing to her, right? She just randomly texted me.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: It'd be the worst men at church.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: I'm screaming.
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: Someone needs to write a book on what it is
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: about church and making you the worst fucking men. It
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: makes you think. She said they'd be posted up at church.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: Keep them away from me, dead ass. They'd be at
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: church on Monday through Saturday. Absolute fucking terrors to women.
• 34:33
  Speaker 3: Terrors.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: I said I hate them. She said facts. Listen, again,
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: good men of God.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: Following, serving the Lord, living your life that way, taking
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: care of your family, being a good man to your woman,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: taking care of your children, helping others, being moral, being
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: conservative and kind.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: I love that for you. No jokes.
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: Dead ass.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: Love that for you.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: The rest of y'all, whack as fuck. Because it's a
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: thing like, stop telling me how good you are because
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: you go to church. Be good because I can see
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: that you're a good person. Be kind to people. What's
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: the Bible verse? Man, I'm getting rusty. Like your fruit,
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean?
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: That one.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: The fruit of your tree should be good fruit. Bear
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: good fruit. You be out here dropping rotten nuts on
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: the ground, okay? And then be expecting me to make
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: pie with this shit. Shit is got maggots in it. Damn.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: It's terrible. Terrible out here.
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: Terrible.
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: He wasn't walking the walk.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: He was not walking the walk.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: He wasn't a bad person, but he just was not
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: walking the walk. And like, I don't need all this
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: performance and extra shit for you to be picking and choosing.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: Because why is it always like the obvious sins?
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: Like pork and sex?
• 36:06
  Speaker 3: What you mean?
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: Like, it's always like, oh, like, I'm not, like, I
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: don't cuss. Okay, but you have three baby mamas while
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: you're married.
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: So what the fuck?
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: Maybe you should switch sins. Give it a little switcheroo.
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: Try something new.
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: Switch sins is crazy.
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: I mean, anything else. Anyway, what else we got going on?
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: Well, Halloween's officially over, which, by the way, loved your costume.
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: Thanks.
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: I was on a boat.
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: So I felt like it was kind of tough to
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: do one of my normal crazy ones.
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: I feel like we shouldn't say what you would have
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: done if you were here.
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: No, because I might run it back.
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I might do it next year. But yeah, I
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: was like a mermaid siren. It was fire.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: It was fun.
• 36:54
  Speaker 3: How was that on the boat?
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: It was really fun. I was really impressed with some
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: of these costumes.
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: Really?
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: So we had a costume contest. So we gave away
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: Gucci bags.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: So very serious costume contest.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: Who won? So one was the girl Cookie Monster. I mean,
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: she was so committed. She had blue hair. Oh, yeah.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: She looked so cute. It was the cutest Cookie Monster.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: And then the other one was Baps.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: Oh, I love Baps.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: And, and then to do that on a ship was
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: a real commitment. Like she had to pack an extra
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: bag to get this costume on. Cause she had the
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: hair and everything. And then the other one was a
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: bouquet of flowers, which I thought was so creative. It
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: was so, it was like a big costume. Yeah. And
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: it was just really creative, but there were so many
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: good costumes.
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: Were you a judge?
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: Yes. Okay.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I did. I had some, I had some consultation.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: It was not solely my decision.
• 37:44
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: So most people were upset about my choices, but, However,
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: there were a lot of great costumes. Everybody did go
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: all out. It was really fun. But yeah, Halloween's over.
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: My high holiday is over. Although I'm still wearing my
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: spooky shirt because I feel like it's appropriate.
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: For voting day. Fuck the patriarchy.
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: Well, it is over and people are already decorating for Christmas.
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: The Christmas.
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: November 1st.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: Target's got the Christmas stuff already out.
• 38:08
  Speaker 3: How do you feel? Like, is there, is November too early?
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: Not that I shop in Target.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't know.
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: Before Thanksgiving, do you decorate?
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: I've never been to Target in my life.
• 38:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what's your cutoff to switch to Christmas decor?
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: So I used to have very strong feelings about this.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: I am a Thanksgiving person. Thanksgiving is the better holiday.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: It's a superior holiday to Christmas. Everyone disagrees with me.
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: They're wrong. Thanksgiving is centered around family, food, football, rest, drinking, okay? Shopping.
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: I love all of these things.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Okay.
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: And they're done at your leisure, right?
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: You have... a specific person that brings a specific dish
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: because they do it the best. There's always a little tea,
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: you know, a little drama. It's acceptable to eat and
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: then take a nap. In fact, if you don't, people
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: are offended. The kids are there. There's no chaos. They're
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: just playing. You don't have to worry about spending a
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: bajillion dollars because you're just making a family dish. Like,
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: it is the better holiday, right? And it sort of
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: like brings in the spirit of Christmas, right?
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: It's the better holiday.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: And you have the whole weekend off because most people
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: don't work on Friday unless you work in retail. Like
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: it's better. But everyone likes Christmas because Christmas has the
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: Christmas songs and the Christmas spirit and the Christmas decorations
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: and the Christmas movies.
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: And I get it. I enjoy all those.
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: Things as well. So I don't like that Thanksgiving has
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: essentially gotten erased.
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: Like, because Christmas is.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: become a whole, like, industry, Thanksgiving has slowly deteriorated as
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: a holiday.
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: So you're not putting your tree up for Thanksgiving.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: Now, I used to be very strong about this. Like,
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: y'all are fucking up Thanksgiving, and it's the better holiday, but....
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: The world's ending.
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: We probably only got like two years left if we're lucky.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: And like people need some whimsy in their life. So
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: I've softened on my hard take on the Christmas decorations.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: I will not be putting my tree up.
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: I actually don't know if I'm going to put my
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: tree up at all because I'm traveling so much.
• 40:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: Which, yeah, like I don't love that. I need to
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: have a little tree. You do. I know, but my
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: tree is so much work. I might get like a
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: little tree this year.
• 40:35
  Speaker 3: Just get a small one.
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: But then I have the tree sitting in storage all
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: year to not use. You know, that's what I did
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: last year. Like it took me forever to get my
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: tree up.
• 40:44
  Speaker 3: I have to buy a whole new one this year.
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: Maybe I'll put my tree up before Thanksgiving this year.
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: That way it's up. Yeah. But, but yeah, I, I've
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: softened on it because people need a little more whimsy
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: and a little more relaxation in their life.
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: So what do you want to put your tree up?
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: Put it up. Fuck it.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: Put it up all year.
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: I don't give a fuck.
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: Some people do that and I'm, I be judging. I'm sorry.
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: It's March 15th and your Christmas tree is up.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: Listen.
• 41:04
  Speaker 5: No.
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: So when do you put your tree up?
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: I grew up putting it. Everything up. Tree included. The
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: day after Thanksgiving.
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: That's what you normally do.
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: That's my childhood. But now that I'm a mommy, I
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: don't think the... It feels very like a mad dash
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: to Christmas between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Because there's just so
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: much going on. There's school stuff. There's kids stuff.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: There's this.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: There's that.
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: Then they're on break. Then you're... It's just... It's too much.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: So now.
• 41:32
  Speaker 3: I've joined the After Halloween Club. So it's up?
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: And I think it should be.
• 41:37
  Speaker 3: It's not up right now because I just moved.
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: So I literally have a zero... Everything was thrown out.
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: I have to buy everything from scratch again. Plus I
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: have different healings, like heights, ceiling heights, the whole thing.
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: But if I had all my materials, it would be up.
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: But it will be up by Thanksgiving.
• 41:51
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: And then moving forward after Halloween.
• 41:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: I do also understand for kids having it up longer.
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: Makes sense because it is a whole operation to put
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: it up and then Thanksgiving becomes a thing so like
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: Thanksgiving week and then after Thanksgiving you're exhausted and so
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: I get it I have softened on it I was
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: a very hard no and I still will stand ten
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: toes down on Thanksgiving being the better holiday but.
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: I do love Thanksgiving yeah.
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: And also like the thing with Christmas is it's become
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: so commercial and the presents and like the Christmas parties
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: and like listen I love all these things I'm not
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: saying they're not good But it does become a lot.
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: And then you're not, like, by the time Christmas actually
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: gets here, I'm like, thank God, you know? So it's
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: like the week after Christmas is your actual rest. Yeah,
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: and then it's another year.
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: But I will take it down before the first of
• 42:46
  Speaker 3: the following year. Every time, absolutely.
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: You have to go in. I'm not so good at that.
• 42:50
  Speaker 3: No, I hate it. I hate January decorations. No, put
• 42:54
  Speaker 3: that shit away. you know what it all there's two
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: things that irritate me on the internet by far one
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: of them is having your tree up in the middle
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: of fucking spring why has it been up since november.
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: Spring tree is weird yeah i'll give you.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: That number two when people don't change the battery in
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: their like smoke detectors and they get on social.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: Media this is an anti-black take hayley this is anti-black
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: it's anti-black i'm sorry.
• 43:21
  Speaker 3: It drives me it Or if I'm on the phone
• 43:23
  Speaker 3: with you and... Did you hear that?
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: It's anti-black.
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: Specs, am I wrong?
• 43:29
  Speaker 3: I don't give a fuck.
• 43:30
  Speaker 4: No, you're not wrong.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: It's an anti-black thing. How do people tune it out?
• 43:33
  Speaker 4: It's almost like... It's like a hymn almost.
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 43:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, it drives me nuts.
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: It is.
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: It's the heartbeat of our homes.
• 43:37
  Speaker 3: No, it drives me nuts.
• 43:38
  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: I can't handle it.
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: It's the heartbeat of black America.
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: No, I understand, but I cannot handle it. It sends
• 43:44
  Speaker 3: my anxiety through the roof.
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: I understand it.
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: Everybody has their thing.
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: I am not changing that.
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: So... If you call me and I hear a beep.
• 43:52
  Speaker 3: I'm coming over. Where's your stepladder?
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: Thankfully, I don't have any beeps right now, but if
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: I do, I'm going to get around to, I am
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: not changing it. So whenever the maintenance man gets around
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: to coming by and popping that out.
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: How can you like silence when you sleep?
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: How you? I do. Because you just ignore it.
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: You don't hear it.
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: After a while.
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: It feels like home.
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: Absolutely not.
• 44:13
  Speaker 3: Not in my home. Not in my new home.
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: Nope.
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: I made sure when I moved in, are all of
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: these new? These new batteries?
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: It's very elite of you.
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: I need at least a year.
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: Before they start beeping. I mean, that first beep is frustrating.
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: The first time you hear it, you're like, fuck.
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: And then you just.
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: Well, I'll just take the whole shit apart if I
• 44:34
  Speaker 3: can't get it changed.
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: Hayley, then you don't have a smoke alarm.
• 44:37
  Speaker 3: Well, none of the rooms will take care of that.
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, God. Insane.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: That's insane.
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: So you just have the battery just hanging out? Oh, yeah.
• 44:46
  Speaker 3: Multiple times I've done that. And then when I get
• 44:47
  Speaker 3: around to going to the store... I'll go.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: Cause nobody has those batteries. My dogs bark at it.
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: Those fuck ass C batteries.
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: What are those batteries?
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: Are they D batteries?
• 44:57
  Speaker 4: I think they like nine volt.
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Nobody has those batteries.
• 45:00
  Speaker 3: The new ones don't even have a fucking battery. So
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: when I learned this the hard way, I tried to
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: undo one. I'm just going to shut it up this way. No,
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: it kept beeping. I took it off and it was
• 45:09
  Speaker 3: beeping in my hand.
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: How do you change it then?
• 45:12
  Speaker 3: Oh, I broke it.
• 45:13
  Speaker 4: You broke it.
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: That's insane. That's not normal.
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: It was beeping in the trash can. Like, Oh, my goodness.
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: Let's get into would you rather.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 45:23
  Speaker 3: Personally, would you rather work through a difficult relationship or
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: start over with someone new?
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: Traditionally speaking, I am a start over. My resume would
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: point to start over. Yeah, I define difficult. And for
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: how long are things difficult?
• 45:48
  Speaker 3: Okay, let's put. Like, what would we consider difficult?
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: I mean....
• 45:56
  Speaker 4: Cheating? No. It's a.
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: You're next to the left.
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: No.
• 46:00
  Speaker 3: No matter how long you've been together.
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: No.
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: Okay. Well, that's not true.
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: I think there are.
• 46:05
  Speaker 3: There's also degrees of cheating.
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's degrees of cheating.
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: Like, there's, like, one and done.
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: There's degrees of cheating.
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: I think there... The reason the cheating happened... um, who
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: it was, where it was. I think there's a lot
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: of nuance to cheating, which a lot of women would
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: disagree with. And I think a lot of men would
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: disagree with as well for them getting cheated on. But
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: I think there are certain, I can't say with absolute
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: certainty that I'm in a relationship with someone for 30
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: years and they cheated one time when they were like a,
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: Would it break the trust?
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: For sure.
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: Does it mean that I'm going to then cheat on you?
• 46:48
  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: But do I necessarily think I would break up with them?
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Those things I couldn't be 100% positive about.
• 46:57
  Speaker 3: So you might work through it.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: I might. But it's very, very likely that I'm leaving you.
• 47:01
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 47:01
  Speaker 3: What if you just grow apart? You know.
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: Again, I think it depends. Like, When I think of
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: a difficult relationship and I think of the difficult relationships
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: that I've been in, unimaginable that I would ever deal
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: with that again.
• 47:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: Just absolutely not. But I also am a unique case
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: study because I don't want kids. I don't care about
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: getting married again. I live a pretty unique lifestyle.
• 47:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: I work in a unique business. I.
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: Am financially independent.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: So like, I don't really need or want to struggle
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: for a man. Like that is just not my bag anymore.
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: And I've done it and it has not rewarded me
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: in this lifetime. So yeah, I mean, I'm kind of
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: just like, yeah, if you, if you make my life difficult,
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: if you make it difficult, you're probably up out of here.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: And that goes across the board. That's for friendships. That's
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: for business. That's for relationships.
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: It's for family.
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: But for relationships specifically, if you're talking about like health
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: or something going on with their family, or maybe they're like,
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: you know, going through a transition at work, so they're
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: transitioning to a new job or, you know, they're dealing
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: with a mental health type of thing. Like those things
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: I think are things that are happening to you. And
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: those are things that as like a devoted partner, you
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: should work through. Things that you're doing to me, that's different. Like, no,
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: we're not doing that. I will stand behind somebody 100%
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: for something that they are going through. But if we
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: are going through something because you are putting us through it, no, no, no, no. No,
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to be able to do it. I'm
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: not a ride or die. I'm neither riding nor dying.
• 48:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: That charm has worn off. I've talked about this many times.
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: I fell for the I want a soldier. I did not.
• 49:03
  Speaker 4: No.
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: No, I did not. No.
• 49:04
  Speaker 4: No.
• 49:06
  Speaker 3: No soldier.
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: I don't want a soldier. Ain't no cater to you.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: Ain't no ride or die.
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: Uh-uh.
• 49:12
  Speaker 5: No.
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: Get somebody else to do it. You can meet me.
• 49:15
  Speaker 3: See, I think I'm a.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: Well, I can only speak from experience. I have wrote
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: it out for some things. It's been quite a long time.
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: But I do think in these long-term relationships, the longer
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: you're in the relationship, I think the threshold and the
• 49:33
  Speaker 3: what you will accept gets very thin or thinner the
• 49:37
  Speaker 3: more time goes on, I feel.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: I mean, I think you, I would agree with that.
• 49:41
  Speaker 3: Like what I put up with at 17 when I
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: got in this relationship is I'm not putting up with now.
• 49:46
  Speaker 3: What I put up with at 25, I'm not putting
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: up with at 35. I'm 35 now. Will I put
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: up with the same shit at 45? Probably not.
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: Right. Yeah. Because I mean, I think after a while
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: it's like, is this who you are or are you
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: going through something or have you made a mistake? And yeah,
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: I mean, I don't, I mean, we talked about earlier,
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: I'm joking about some of the cringier things that I've
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: done to try and make things work in a relationship.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: And yeah, I just, again, other than dick, like what,
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: what has it got me, you know?
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: I mean, companionship.
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: Ah, you know, and like, no, you know, I am okay.
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: Safe place to be vulnerable.
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: No, they're not.
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: It's definitely not a safe place. Definitely not a safe place.
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: And listen, I've been, I've had wonderful relationships with wonderful
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: people and there are relationships that I've had where I like,
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: I think very highly of these people still.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: Like it's not like every relationship I've been in has
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: been terrible.
• 50:50
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: That's not the case. However, I just don't, I don't
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: view life as this everlasting resource, right? I want to
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: enjoy my time here. I want to enjoy the people
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: I'm around. I do not want to continue making the
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: same mistakes, which has been a lifelong struggle for me.
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: I want to learn from habits and break bad habits.
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: So I'm trying to spend as much of this time
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: happy safe and enjoying myself.
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: That's not what life is. Life has struggle. Life has tension.
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: Life has pain and suffering and grief. So for the
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: things that I can control, which is my relationship that
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: I choose.
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: It ain't going to be one of them things where
• 51:45
  Speaker 2: you're going to put me through shit.
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: Now we might go through shit because life has brought
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: us shit.
• 51:49
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: But you are not going through, to be the one
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: bringing the shit to me. And if I meet you
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: at a point where you're going through a bunch of bullshit, how.
• 52:02
  Speaker 2: Are you handling that shit?
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: Because that doesn't necessarily disqualify you, but how are you
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: dealing with the shit that's going on in your life?
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: Is it my problem? Is it something that you're using
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: as an excuse for your behavior? There's a lot of
• 52:15
  Speaker 1: nuance to human beings. And look, I come with a
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: lot of shit too. I am not an easy person
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: to deal with. I am intolerant of a lot of behavior.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: I have a lot of quirks. Let's say it that way.
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: And I've been through a lot of things in life.
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: Like I have a lot of experiences. I don't expect
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: most men to, once they get to know me, to
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: be completely secure in dealing with everything that comes with me.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: I think that's fine. I'm not, there's nothing I plan
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: on doing about that.
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: One of my biggest things in relationships is I cannot
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: deal with someone who is insecure. And I cannot deal
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: with someone who wants to change me. And that has
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: been a big realization of mine. And it has steered
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: me clear of a lot of stressful situations. Because those
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: type of things manifest in really toxic ways. Especially with men.
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: Like I'm not.
• 53:18
  Speaker 3: The insecurity one is a big thing.
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's so nasty. It's so nasty. On both sides, actually.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I don't date women, so
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that's about. I'm sure it's awful.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: But yeah, like the going through the phone thing, the
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: like bugging out about where you are.
• 53:36
  Speaker 3: I've gone through phones.
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: Oh, I've gone through phones.
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: I've gone through phones.
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: And I found exactly what I was looking for every
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: fucking time. Every fucking time.
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: However, I still think it's wrong. But I've done it.
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: Going through phones?
• 53:45
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 53:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, yeah. If you go through my phone, I'm
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: done with you immediately. I wouldn't even discuss what you found.
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: I don't care if you're angry. I no longer want
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: to be with you. I'm not explaining myself. I'm not apologizing.
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: And I don't want to be with you. Don't touch
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: my fucking phone.
• 54:01
  Speaker 3: Even if you did something bad. And they found it
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: in your phone.
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: Well, I wouldn't have done something bad.
• 54:07
  Speaker 3: But what if they suspected? What if you really did?
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: And you didn't, you got away with it and they
• 54:11
  Speaker 3: suspected and went through your phone and the proof's there.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: I mean, I know women are way better.
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: Give me a break, please.
• 54:17
  Speaker 3: But let's just say you slacked a little bit.
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: The fucking CIA.
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: Okay. And got shit on me.
• 54:23
  Speaker 4: All right.
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: There's no, there's no fucking way. Okay. No, they're not
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: going to do that. They're not that good.
• 54:28
  Speaker 4: You know that. No, I know.
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: Men are, y'all are the worst.
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: They're not that good.
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: They're not that, they're not that good. They would not
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: find anything. So what they would find would be something
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: that would upset them. Like they went in my group
• 54:40
  Speaker 1: chat or something like you're going to have to really dig.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: And I'm not, you're upset.
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: I don't care.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: I'm not even apologizing for it.
• 54:49
  Speaker 4: Why are you on my phone?
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: Now, if I go through your phone, I'm damn sure
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: going to find something because if you're insecure enough to
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: go through my phone, I know you up to some shit. Yeah.
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: Every fucking time a man has been insecure with me
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: and tried to make it seem like I was doing
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: something wrong.
• 55:04
  Speaker 3: They were doing it.
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: Every fucking time they were up to something. They were
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: doing it. Every time.
• 55:07
  Speaker 3: They tell on themselves.
• 55:09
  Speaker 2: Every time. They can't control it.
• 55:10
  Speaker 3: They tell on themselves.
• 55:12
  Speaker 2: Dog, let me give you a little tip.
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: All right? Let me give you a little cheating tip.
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: If you are cheating on your girl and you want
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: to get away with it, treat her good. Treat her good.
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: But not.
• 55:26
  Speaker 3: Not great.
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: Not new good.
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: Not new good.
• 55:28
  Speaker 3: How you've been treating her.
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: Not new good. Not new good.
• 55:31
  Speaker 4: And....
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: Not, yeah, not over the top. Just treat her good.
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: That thing that you want to pick at, don't. That thing,
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: that little thing she wants to go to, you don't
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: feel like going to, go. Don't do nothing different. Y'all
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: telling yourselves every time.
• 55:50
  Speaker 3: Every time.
• 55:51
  Speaker 2: Every fucking time.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: Oh, I don't like that little girl you with. Every
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: time you out with her, you want to be out late. Mm-hmm. Oh. Mm-hmm. Oh.
• 56:02
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: Well, now I know that thing I was worried about
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: is something to worry about. Because why the fuck do
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: you all of a sudden care about this?
• 56:10
  Speaker 2: Y'all telling yourselves every fucking time.
• 56:11
  Speaker 3: Every time.
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
• 56:13
  Speaker 2: They're so bad at it.
• 56:15
  Speaker 3: Every time.
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: So bad.
• 56:17
  Speaker 2: Specs, it's remarkable. Hailey, am I wrong?
• 56:19
  Speaker 5: No.
• 56:20
  Speaker 2: It's so frustrating. Like, dog, we was just cool.
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: And you went and cheated. And now you feel insecure.
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: So you have to say something to me.
• 56:31
  Speaker 3: You know what else they do, though? They'll compare their
• 56:34
  Speaker 3: girl to who they cheated with or are cheating with.
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: And that will come out. And that will also tell
• 56:41
  Speaker 3: on you.
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: What are you talking about?
• 56:42
  Speaker 3: Like, I've heard stories from some girlfriends, right, where they
• 56:46
  Speaker 3: caught their dude cheating. But before they caught him, before
• 56:48
  Speaker 3: they had the proof, he would come in the house like, yeah,
• 56:51
  Speaker 3: I feel like you should just switch your style up
• 56:54
  Speaker 3: and like, dude, dude, dude, dude. Or like, You should
• 56:58
  Speaker 3: start doing your hair this way because, like, yeah, that'll
• 57:00
  Speaker 3: be fire. But it's from the bitch that they cheating with.
• 57:04
  Speaker 4: Trying to remix you into the muse.
• 57:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, or they come in the house and they just
• 57:08
  Speaker 3: get mad at you because you not her. Because she doing,
• 57:11
  Speaker 3: she the fun, wild, freaky one. They ain't got to
• 57:14
  Speaker 3: deal with all the bills in the house and all
• 57:15
  Speaker 3: that shit. And then you taking it out on me
• 57:17
  Speaker 3: in the house, holding the household down because you out
• 57:19
  Speaker 3: there wilding.
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: Another flag. I haven't experienced that, thankfully.
• 57:24
  Speaker 3: Oh, listen, I've heard some stories.
• 57:26
  Speaker 2: That's nasty work.
• 57:27
  Speaker 3: But it's obvious as hell.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, see, that's the thing about cheating men and cheating women.
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: Because women and men cheat for, usually, for different reasons,
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: women are better at it because we're more intentional creatures.
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: So.
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: We're not just going to go out and get hit
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: on at the bar and just fuck some guy. Now,
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: that does happen, but it's.
• 57:51
  Speaker 2: Way more rare. Way more rare.
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: We know exactly who we're going to cheat on you with.
• 57:59
  Speaker 4: Exactly.
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: And that man doesn't give a fuck about you. He
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: don't give a fuck about you, my boy. And he
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: ain't going.
• 58:07
  Speaker 2: To say shit.
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: He will take that shit to the motherfucking grave because
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: it ain't about you. It really ain't about you. It
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: ain't about your relationship. He don't want nothing from you.
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: He ain't trying to raise them kids. He ain't trying
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: to do, he ain't doing, he ain't doing nothing but
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: getting some A1 respectfully.
• 58:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's different. It's very different.
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: He ain't going to text nothing funny.
• 58:30
  Speaker 4: He going to be at the birthday party.
• 58:32
  Speaker 2: He going to keep it right pushing. Right pushing.
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: If he needs to be.
• 58:35
  Speaker 2: If he needs to be. If he don't, he don't.
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: It ain't even all that. Because women usually will do
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: that with a man that they know is not going
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: to be in the mix. Ain't going to be around.
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: It's going to be one of them ones. What you doing? Chilling?
• 58:48
  Speaker 5: What you doing?
• 58:49
  Speaker 3: You don't got to change their name to Pizza Hut
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: or Fashion Nova.
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: Delete, delete, delete, delete.
• 58:53
  Speaker 4: Pull up. I've seen some death defying feeds by women. Oh, listen. Really?
• 58:58
  Speaker 4: Like what? Like us in the backyard.
• 59:01
  Speaker 3: What you mean?
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, like all together?
• 59:03
  Speaker 3: Like the.
• 59:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 59:05
  Speaker 4: No, no, no.
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: Women will do you horrific.
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, I can slide.
• 59:10
  Speaker 5: Him in here and he can stay under he could
• 59:12
  Speaker 5: be undetected yeah but that's for sure.
• 59:14
  Speaker 4: I've been behind enemy lines.
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah no but like listen women can pull that off
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: because we know we know our we know our predators Right?
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: We've studied them. So there really is a different, there's
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: a different art and finesse to what women do that
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: men do not have. Because when men are cheating, they're
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: not doing it with intention. That's why when I hear
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: these horror stories about men getting away with wild shit,
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, either your girl trusted you so, so, so, so, so,
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: so much, or you were living, you were James Bond
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: level with this shit. Because women have an intuition. Our
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: bodies change. Like, we just feel different when some, and
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: it's not even about like some other bitch. It's like,
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: you just, there's just something off and our nervous systems
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: are so wired to protect ourselves that we just fucking know.
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: So when we do it, oh, listen, I was just
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: talking to one of my homies the other day. He
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: was like, you know what? One thing, I will never
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: play with a woman. I will never play with a woman.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: I will be single, but I will not play with
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: a woman because a woman will always outdo you. A
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: woman will destroy you In such a classy and maniacal
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: way that you will never be able to put yourself
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: back together again. And it will be your fault. You
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 1: will have created this monster. So yeah, in short, don't
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: do it.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: Don't do it.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: You ain't built for it, my boy. You're not about
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: this life.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: You're not about this life.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 1: Just say no.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: Say no to the pussy.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: Ain't about doing the right thing. It's for you.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 2: It's actually for you. We're doing you a favor.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 3: Or just break up.
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: They can't do that. They want to have their cake
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: and eat it too. They want to have all the cakes.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: All of them.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: They're greedy. All of them.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: Greedy. Yeah. And that should tell you how mediocre dick
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: is because women are like, ugh, is this really worth it?
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: Is it really worth fucking up my whole life? I
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: will tell you this.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: Well, you have nothing to do with this because you're
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: in a relationship. But what I will say... Well, maybe
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 1: you do.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 4: I don't know. I.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: most of the time will not dabble with someone because the,
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: the imagination of what it would be like versus the
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: reality is almost like what I imagine it's like is
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: almost always better than what it actually will be. So
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: I'm like, it's actually better to just imagine what you would,
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: what it would be like to be with you than
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: to like actually activate it. Cause I'm going to activate
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: this and you're going to be a disappointment. And then
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: I'm going to be annoyed.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 3: Like to date or to cheat?
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: No, like to sleep with. Okay.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 3: Just in general.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 2: And usually the finer, the worse.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 3: Well, damn, that don't do you any good. You're going
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 3: to have to lower that imagination a little bit. You
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 3: can't just be out here disappointing yourself.
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 2: I know, but the bar is already in hell.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: Like, can't I just imagine that they're going to, you know,
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: put my head through a wall?
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 2: Without damage.
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 4: Not in a violent way. Okay.
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 2: Metaphorically speaking.
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: I mean, damn.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I don't know.
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: It keeps me out of a lot of trouble. They
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: have tells too, you know.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: Really? Mm-hmm.
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: It's certain things. How they climb in a chair, you know.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 2: You gotta be very observant.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 3: What do you mean how they climb in a chair?
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: Like men just do things sometimes and I'm like, I
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know about that.
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 2: What about a walk? Can't be good.
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: Walk is very important.
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 4: Walk is very important.
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 1: Um, there's, there's a lot of signs. You gotta be,
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: gotta be very observant. Men will be like woman.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 4: What? Teeth. Okay.
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 1: Oh man. Hopefully we'll have the, uh, to see an
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: episode for you guys this week. If not, I'll be
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 1: out next week, but it's really great conversation. Um, thanks
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: to everyone who came to say hi on the cruise. Um,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: Make sure you check us out on Urban One Podcast
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: and check out The Daily Play and Rep the City,
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: which is up today, the Bay Area episode.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 2: Thanks so much for hanging with us. Make sure you
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: hit subscribe.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: Follow us on social at 2PersonalShow and we'll catch you
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: next time.