Latest / Making Everyday Magic: The Podcast / Homeschool Haters, Internet Trolls, and Why I Don't Need to Defend My Life

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Homeschool Haters, Internet Trolls, and Why I Don't Need to Defend My Life · Making Everyday Magic: The Podcast

• 0:00
  This is your warning.
• 0:02
  Okay.
• 0:02
  For those of you who watch me
• 0:07
  on a loudspeaker in your house
• 0:09
  while let your kids watch me, some of you have told me you do.
• 0:13
  Maybe not this video
• 0:15
  because your girl has failed.
• 0:19
  And I just anticipate.
• 0:20
  And this is your warning, that I might be dropping some, but of the variety.
• 0:26
  So race yourselves, because here we go today.
• 0:29
  Welcome back to making it Everyday Magic.
• 0:31
  My name is Shanna and if you are new here where I'm schooling family of four,
• 0:34
  we are entering our 10th year of homeschooling.
• 0:37
  I have a teenager.
• 0:38
  I have an adolescent second child, both daughters,
• 0:42
  and I am a perimenopausal woman, which means.
• 0:46
  And I was raised by strong women, which means I give exactly no.
• 0:57
  Before we go any further.
• 0:58
  Please scroll down.
• 1:00
  Hit the big red subscribe button and turn on the bell for notifications.
• 1:03
  While you are down there.
• 1:04
  You can find me down in the comments
• 1:06
  or over on Instagram at Making Every Day Magic.
• 1:10
  So. Hey. Hi. How are you?
• 1:12
  Let me start with
• 1:15
  the motivation for this study.
• 1:17
  The motivation for this video is that I got actually,
• 1:21
  for the first time in a long time, a nasty comment.
• 1:24
  I don't get many nasty comments, I really don't.
• 1:27
  Which is kind of shocking, but I really don't.
• 1:30
  And it's kind of great. But I was recently thinking
• 1:33
  about how I hadn't had one in a while, so there you go.
• 1:35
  That's my own fault.
• 1:36
  But I did get a nasty comment and.
• 1:42
  I genuinely
• 1:45
  think that they are hilarious.
• 1:48
  And I thought about how this applies
• 1:52
  to the rest of life, and especially homeschooling
• 1:56
  as we're going into this new home school year, because I know that you too,
• 2:00
  have gotten some seriously shitty comments
• 2:03
  from people who are
• 2:06
  dumb, short sighted, like just useless.
• 2:10
  I mean, I don't even know people who don't matter a lick at all,
• 2:16
  who have nothing better to do than to inject into you
• 2:21
  what you got going on, your life, your things, whatever.
• 2:25
  And I know, yes,
• 2:27
  I come here and I share in the internet, but you still get it in your real life
• 2:31
  the same way I still get it in my real life.
• 2:32
  And so I thought it might be amazing because I was just going to do
• 2:35
  like an Instagram rail because I think it's so funny.
• 2:38
  But then I was like, you know what?
• 2:40
  My biggest audience is actually you.
• 2:42
  You right there, right here, right now.
• 2:45
  And so I was like, let's do it.
• 2:47
  Let's talk about the criticism.
• 2:49
  Let's talk about the shitty comments.
• 2:50
  Let's talk about the serious all around grumpy,
• 2:55
  nasty, shortsighted, crabby bull trolls.
• 2:59
  And let's kind of have fun with it.
• 3:02
  So I'm gonna need your help today.
• 3:03
  I have a task for you.
• 3:05
  This is your homework.
• 3:06
  Homework being during this video, right after this video,
• 3:08
  or just in real life all the time.
• 3:10
  And what I need you to do, okay, is twofold.
• 3:13
  I need two things from you.
• 3:15
  The first, do not go down into my comments.
• 3:19
  Do not go find my DMs.
• 3:21
  Do not tell.
• 3:22
  Oh, I'm so sorry.
• 3:24
  Those people were mean to you. You're great.
• 3:27
  I don't want it.
• 3:29
  I don't need it.
• 3:30
  I know I'm great, I love me, I am one of my favorite people.
• 3:35
  The people who I live with in my home love me.
• 3:38
  They like me, I like them, I know who I am.
• 3:41
  I am secure in this face.
• 3:44
  That is Shawna and I just don't need it. I don't want it.
• 3:46
  I am genuinely here because I think it is hilarious.
• 3:50
  The things that people will say when they have abso friggin
• 3:54
  lutely no business saying them.
• 3:57
  Like, oh babe, it's like thought, look at you.
• 4:01
  Things like that genuinely bring me so much
• 4:07
  joy. And I don't know if it's because I am somebody who does not shy away
• 4:11
  from a confrontation, but it truly just, I don't know.
• 4:15
  It fuels my soul a little bit to know that I in some way
• 4:21
  have have made somebody else's day a little worse just by living my life,
• 4:25
  you know what I mean?
• 4:26
  And I don't know if that's my petty,
• 4:27
  I don't know what it is, but it truly brings me joy.
• 4:30
  And the last thing that I will do is fight with somebody on the internet.
• 4:32
  That is so dumb.
• 4:34
  I'm not gonna fight with somebody on the internet that is so stupid.
• 4:36
  You don't know me in real life. I don't know you in real life.
• 4:39
  If this is where you get your rocks off. Good for you, babe.
• 4:41
  So that is the first thing I need from you.
• 4:44
  Don't call me. I don't want it.
• 4:45
  I don't need it.
• 4:46
  I'm not looking for it.
• 4:47
  Please, for Christ's sake, don't call me that.
• 4:49
  Don't do it, you guys.
• 4:51
  In the back of my throat.
• 4:51
  I know who I am, and I don't need anybody else to tell me.
• 4:53
  And anyway. Number two.
• 4:57
  And this is what I want from you.
• 4:59
  Drop down the comments and give me my sweet sisters in Antichrist.
• 5:07
  Give me those patties.
• 5:10
  Give me your petty comebacks, give me your best responses,
• 5:13
  and you can give me your witty comebacks, your best responses
• 5:17
  to the common things that we get in homeschool life.
• 5:20
  So the one about socialization, oh, shouldn't they be in school today?
• 5:25
  Oh, look at that.
• 5:27
  Oh, do you know five times five.
• 5:29
  Give me your comebacks for those.
• 5:32
  Or feel free to give me your comeback
• 5:35
  for the comment that I got, and I will let you know what mine was.
• 5:39
  So I will try to insert it on the screen.
• 5:41
  So let me step over because I'll just make my life a little easier.
• 5:44
  So I'm going to read it to you. Are you ready?
• 5:47
  I feel now this is on on my small space organization homeschool video.
• 5:51
  I feel sorry for the kids who have to spend all day alone
• 5:54
  with this immature, smothering, narcissistic mother.
• 5:59
  She will cripple her kids with her emotional neediness.
• 6:03
  Even the nose ring checks out.
• 6:05
  She is doing this for herself, noticing how she always says we.
• 6:10
  It is all about her.
• 6:12
  Her poor children are just an afterthought now.
• 6:17
  My poor children are just an afterthought.
• 6:21
  First of all, I'm going to tell you
• 6:22
  why this comment is a banger.
• 6:25
  Okay, this comment is a banger
• 6:27
  because there's a lot of stuff in here that people don't realize or recognize.
• 6:31
  This is my 10th year of homeschooling.
• 6:32
  I started doing this way back because my child was is advanced.
• 6:38
  Okay?
• 6:39
  And not only that,
• 6:42
  this is not something that was ever on our path or plan.
• 6:46
  This is entirely in service to my children.
• 6:48
  So I know that I know my real life.
• 6:50
  I know my reality.
• 6:51
  As far as narcissistic, I love me, I think I'm great, I truly do.
• 6:56
  I don't think I do that at the detriment to other people.
• 6:58
  But that's cool.
• 6:59
  And as far as let's see, we why do I say we?
• 7:03
  Because you guys know if you've been here for any period of time,
• 7:05
  my homeschool is a collaborative experience.
• 7:08
  Everyone is here because they want to and not because they are forced to.
• 7:12
  Not now, not ever.
• 7:13
  Not the kids, not me.
• 7:15
  Now. Let's see.
• 7:17
  Emotional meeting is emotional neediness.
• 7:21
  People who know me in my real life know that emotion
• 7:25
  is not a thing that I ever been described,
• 7:31
  been used to describe this guy right here.
• 7:32
  So that is fantastic.
• 7:34
  And to step back over comments time now you don't know.
• 7:39
  You don't know people's story.
• 7:40
  You don't know what people have going on.
• 7:43
  And so for me, the thing that I love so much and again
• 7:48
  it's probably because
• 7:49
  I don't shy away from confrontation, there is nothing better to me
• 7:53
  than instead of fighting with someone to deflate them.
• 7:58
  That's it, that's it. That person came looking for a fight.
• 8:00
  That person has never landed on my channel before.
• 8:02
  I don't know how they got here, and they probably watched
• 8:04
  about three seconds before seeing,
• 8:06
  you know that I'm a blue haired liberal and I have a nose ring.
• 8:09
  Okay.
• 8:09
  And so
• 8:10
  my response to that comment was simply because my first thought is to type words.
• 8:14
  Then I was like, you know what?
• 8:15
  Laughing emoji.
• 8:16
  That's it, that's it. Laughing with you. Laughing at you.
• 8:19
  There we go babe. Laughing emoji. Cool.
• 8:21
  I want you to know I've seen it but
• 8:24
  laughing emoji for me that is like
• 8:28
  just sucking there out of someone's balloon and it brings me joy.
• 8:31
  If you're going to be nasty, the last thing I'm going to do
• 8:34
  is let it fly, but I'm also not going to engage.
• 8:36
  You're not worth my time and you're not worth my energy.
• 8:38
  And this comes up so much in the homeschool world.
• 8:43
  It's not our business. Okay?
• 8:45
  I don't know what you're doing out there. You guys know that?
• 8:47
  I have told you time and time and time again, I come here and I share,
• 8:51
  not to tell you what to do, but simply because I couldn't find a voice like mine.
• 8:55
  I couldn't have somebody who homeschooled.
• 8:56
  I couldn't find somebody who homeschooled away at home schooled.
• 8:58
  I wanted other people to know out there that there were other people
• 9:03
  who were just staying in their lane, trying to do their things.
• 9:06
  I love to share what I come across
• 9:09
  because I want to save you some time, energy and effort.
• 9:13
  I want you to know what works for us, what doesn't serve us
• 9:17
  so that you can be like, you know what?
• 9:19
  My school isn't like that, or my homeschool is like that.
• 9:22
  But what I never want to do is tell you what you should or shouldn't do, okay?
• 9:25
  Your kids are socialized.
• 9:26
  You guys know I have very big feelings on educational neglect,
• 9:29
  and I don't think this is a way of life is for everyone.
• 9:31
  While this way of life can serve every home,
• 9:35
  not every home is meant to homeschool.
• 9:37
  You guys know that I have very big feelings on emotional neglect.
• 9:41
  I have very big feelings on societal commentary, and I come here
• 9:45
  and I share them with you because I think it's very important
• 9:48
  and because this is my voice,
• 9:49
  this is my platform, and this is where I come to share.
• 9:51
  And these are the things that I am
• 9:52
  passionate about and the things that I share about.
• 9:54
  But it is never to have commentary on your choices or what you do.
• 9:58
  It is to have commentary on society, is to have commentary on things that I do
• 10:02
  view as red flags in the world, and it is to come and share with you
• 10:06
  things that could be really great for you, or things that couldn't, to save you
• 10:09
  a little bit of stress and anxiety, and to let you know
• 10:11
  there's someone else out there who's just trying to do their best.
• 10:15
  And I want to remind you that people don't know the full story,
• 10:19
  but they also don't deserve the full story.
• 10:21
  I come here and I share things with you.
• 10:23
  I very rarely anymore actually share my kids, and that's their choice.
• 10:28
  Okay.
• 10:29
  And I talk about a lot of things,
• 10:30
  but I don't overshare my personal life, even on my personal social media pages.
• 10:35
  That is not for me.
• 10:36
  People don't need to know my business and I work very hard to.
• 10:39
  I know that that seems like counterintuitive
• 10:42
  that I share here with you, but I keep a lot of things personal on my end.
• 10:46
  But that is the balance that I have struck with myself,
• 10:48
  and I can always just be proud of myself for making the decisions
• 10:51
  with the information I have in the moment that I have to make those decisions.
• 10:55
  And so far, I am really proud of the way that we have done this
• 10:58
  homeschooling thing, this parenting thing, marriage life.
• 11:01
  I feel like it works really, really well, and I do hope that it is
• 11:05
  a point of inspiration for some of you out there.
• 11:08
  A point of even if it is, man, I don't want to do anything like her.
• 11:12
  Great. Then you know that you've seen that.
• 11:14
  You can identify that without having to live that.
• 11:17
  And I think that's great too.
• 11:18
  But people don't know the full story.
• 11:22
  For example,
• 11:22
  when people see my colored hair, they think I'm just a crazy lady, right?
• 11:25
  No, I have a background as a cosmetologist.
• 11:30
  Hair change brings me joy.
• 11:33
  I love to experiment and try new things.
• 11:35
  I am a hair stylist.
• 11:37
  I view art as hair.
• 11:39
  I view hair as a fluid medium.
• 11:42
  I'm not attached to it.
• 11:43
  I love to try new things with my hair.
• 11:45
  It brings me so much happiness to be able to make changes
• 11:49
  and swaps and things like that.
• 11:50
  And you can't tell me that hair isn't directly tied
• 11:54
  to how you feel as a person with a fresh haircut, or how you feel
• 11:58
  after a fresh breakup, and your hairstylist has to talk
• 12:00
  you out of those sudden bangs that you have a desire for.
• 12:03
  Hair is meant to be like one of your best accessories,
• 12:07
  and I truly believe that to be the case.
• 12:08
  I love to change my hair.
• 12:10
  As far as my nose ring, I've never shared this here, but
• 12:14
  when I decided with my very first paycheck, for my very first job
• 12:17
  when I was 18 years old that I wanted to get my nose pierced,
• 12:21
  I went and I went to go donate blood because I had donated blood.
• 12:26
  And that was important kind of to my family.
• 12:28
  And so I was encouraged to donate blood before I got my nose pierced.
• 12:32
  Because you can't donate blood for so long after you have a fresh piercing
• 12:35
  or tattoo.
• 12:36
  I went to donate blood and my iron was too low.
• 12:39
  So while I was too anemic to donate blood, they said,
• 12:42
  but you can get you can do this other thing and this other thing.
• 12:46
  And here is a call to service guys, go out, donate blood
• 12:49
  and get on the National Marrow Donor Program registry.
• 12:53
  So they were able to take a small vial of blood and put me on the National
• 12:57
  Donor Program Registry, which pairs people up who need bone marrow and stem
• 13:02
  cell transplants with people,
• 13:04
  healthy people who can provide that to hopefully help people battle
• 13:09
  things like leukemia and various cancers, to get back to a healthy meaning,
• 13:14
  to get back to healthy people and back to their families and back to their lives.
• 13:18
  So while I was 18, I decided to get my nose pierced and what a latent
• 13:23
  consequence of that was registering on the National Marrow Donor Program.
• 13:27
  Now, when I did that, I was like, oh, I just feel like they're going to call me.
• 13:30
  And sure enough, a couple of years later, they did call me.
• 13:33
  I was an anonymous match to someone who needed a bone marrow transplant.
• 13:40
  That bone marrow transplant.
• 13:42
  Nieder was halfway across the country from me
• 13:46
  and his 13 year old boy.
• 13:49
  This was his last hope.
• 13:50
  This was his last chance at
• 13:54
  surviving.
• 13:55
  And I knew that it was important to me, my little brother, at the time of 14,
• 14:01
  just to give you some perspective, it's important to me
• 14:04
  that I did this because it's a big thing and it's so important.
• 14:08
  So I did donate anonymously bone marrow to this boy
• 14:13
  who since is no longer anonymous and is now.
• 14:19
  Let me do the math.
• 14:20
  If I'm 42, my brothers are 38, so he just turned 37
• 14:26
  and I'm very proud of that.
• 14:31
  Not only that,
• 14:32
  a couple of years later they called me again anonymously.
• 14:36
  Completely random tissue match.
• 14:38
  It never happens for anybody, let alone twice for stem cells,
• 14:42
  for an elderly gentleman who did not actually make it.
• 14:48
  His family wrote me a very nice note
• 14:51
  anyway.
• 14:54
  And I am emotional
• 14:57
  because of that.
• 14:59
  And I have had people in my real personal life as like, are you done with that?
• 15:03
  Are you really giving that in?
• 15:04
  After you get married, you have kids.
• 15:06
  It'll never go.
• 15:07
  It will never come because it's not a nose ring.
• 15:12
  It's life.
• 15:17
  Guys.
• 15:20
  That's it.
• 15:21
  Deflate them and just do you do what you want.
• 15:25
  Live your life.
• 15:26
  Be bold. Be blue haired, be a nose ring.
• 15:29
  Have her be wild,
• 15:31
  be crazy and appreciate the connections that get you from here to there.
• 15:35
  Remember that life is bigger than any comment, any negativity, any bullying.
• 15:40
  The world is an amazing place.
• 15:42
  The world is your own and it is all things.
• 15:45
  I am truly a believer that all things are meant to serve you and to serve others.
• 15:50
  Do your best.
• 15:51
  Live with your heart pure of intent and go out.
• 15:56
  Do big things.
• 15:57
  Do wonderful things. Change the world.
• 16:00
  Be nice. Be.
• 16:02
  And if someone comes up to you unkind, you know,
• 16:08
  be whatever they deserve in that moment.
• 16:12
  So don't forget, don't coddle me.
• 16:15
  It's gross.
• 16:16
  Go down to those comments and give me your comebacks, babe,
• 16:19
  because I chose a laughing emoji. But who knows what.
• 16:21
  Maybe next time you've got a zinger for me and I love it guys.
• 16:24
  I love a good zinger, so I hope that you found
• 16:28
  this helpful, entertaining, informative.
• 16:29
  If you did, please scroll down, hit that big red subscribe button,
• 16:32
  turn on the bell for notifications and give this video a thumbs up.
• 16:36
  As always, you can find me down in the comments groover on Instagram
• 16:40
  at Making Everyday Magic. And
• 16:44
  guys, let's together keep spreading good.
• 16:48
  Let's be the good, let's be the amazing things.
• 16:50
  Let's serve our children well. Let's do exciting things.
• 16:53
  Let's do fun things.
• 16:54
  Let's remember that life is meant to have some whimsy and some glory.
• 16:58
  And together, let's keep making every day magic.