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Episode 78: Art Attack! · The Tom & Gerry Show Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I would just listen to the New Dom and Jerry Show.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: They had a good old chat about robbery and Louver
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Museum at weekend and they say, we're a skilled team
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: with power tools who got away on motor bikes. And
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: I would just like to say, I can tell thee
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: now I had a bloody good alibi for this weekend.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: You see that big chimney over there. No, you don't
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: see it, do you. That's because I spent the weekend
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: knocking it down. So not guilty on any museum robberies
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: you're on that, I'll see them.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to the Tom and Jerry Show with me,
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Jerry McBride and him Tom o' manoney. If you're wondering
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: why I'm so professional today, Thomas.
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: Because I've got a heart out here. I can't. I
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: can't have one of these rambling sing song intros.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: Get clear up their heart out there that you can't
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: just come in and say that's out. Your average person
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: doesn't know what recording procedure is. You're not sitting there
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: with a rage.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: But he's like, oh, great, an episode of the Tom
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: and Jerry Show. I'll put it on and do five
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: jobs around the house. There's gonna be a three job episode.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Last again, I can only apologize. There's a gremlin still
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: fully awake and run around as much as a fucking padger.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: So if you're here, yeah, he just something metal just
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: got knocked over there. So if the microphone is supersensitive,
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: you picked it up. You just heard about But it's
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: an about two grands worth of damage, do you know?
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Tom and I do listen to podcasts other than the
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Tom and Jerry Show. Sorry about that, but I always
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: hear the hosts saying no apologies for what you can
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: hear in the background, apologies for what you can hear it,
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: and I can never hear nothing. Maybe it's my twenty
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: year old team headphones that won't leow me to pick
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: up the sounds of it, but I don't hear anything.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: It was your time in the army, jar all you're
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: fucking hearing this fucked anyway.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: So I'll tell you Tom, quite frankly, on occasion, I
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: wouldn't mind hearing a wee bit of battle in the back,
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: like you know, what's that in the back.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: I'm just nosy what's going on in your house?
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Or true? True that like if the if the microphones
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: are decent because quite often you'll hear you're here a
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: host do that or run zoom together, and they're just
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: not using a microphone at all, and they're just speaking
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: to the laptop or whatever, and you go, yeah, of
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: course I can. I can hear your fucking heartbeat. But
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: if if a decent microphone, plus there's a bit of
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Beyonce with something funny happened in the background, I'm okay
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: with us, because now now we're all part of the game. Yeah, yeah,
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: it doesn't.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: I hate to break into the listeners of the Tom
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: and Jerry Show, but we recording this in front of
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: a live studio audience, I'll tell you that much.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: We couldn't trust them last time we did that yere
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: win pair shape, so we won't get into that again.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: It's about all I can do to get the kids
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: to not actively bang on the door like they're trying
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: to come through a china.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Or literally there's there is. The dog is scratching the door.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: Now as I sit here, the dog is scratching, and
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: I'm only praying the wife comes over and gives it
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: a toe up the hole or something, because it's it's
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: now the saddest stock in the world because I'm gone
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: three minutes, like you know, we'll.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: We'll bust in and out of this one. Tom will
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: be gone in sixty seconds. I have to go buy
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: a dishwasher because my dishwasher are packed in so I
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: have to fly up the power city, not sponsors.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: To the Tom and Jerry show me you can do
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: without a lot of things, And I honestly up there
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: with the combustion engine. The dishwashers one of the greatest
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: things because at the time, it like when you see
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: the Americans actually doing the washing up, I'm like, you
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: people have NASA, What god the fuck would make it
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: ever dream of scrubbing a plate?
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: There's honest I talk a good game, like how you'd
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: survive the apocalypse, and when the shit goes down, I'll be,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: you know, filtering water along a stream through a whole
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: dug in the side of it to filter out parasites
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: and shit. And I'm like, no, the dishwasher broke this
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: morning and I'm not going another twenty four hours out one.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I can see his eye to witching lights. I'm not
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I'm not actually joking with you, well, mister man, And
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: he's looking for a drier to look at it. You
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: might pick me up on while you're there, good because
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I you know, I hate them places. I just you know,
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: send it in the post.
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: I'm just like, how much of that? Yea, yeah, give
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: me here. Yeah.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: Anyway, we're gonna launch on, ladies and gentlemen. This episode
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: is brought to you by the lack of a dishwasher.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: But that's not the big news of the week.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: The big news of the week just dropped.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, Tom, we have to get into but
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: I can't talk shoight anymore before bringing these good people
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: the weekly what have you?
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: This is a very complicated case, mad you know, a
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: lot of a lot of outs, a lot of what
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: have you, and a lot of strands to keep in
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: my head. Man, this gets me very excited. This is
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: so on brand with Tom and Jerry, Like this is
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: all our Christmas has come at once, when this is
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: this is when just when you thought in modern society
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: you couldn't pull off a buster what's his name was
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: a buster?
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: Buster? Yeah?
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Buster, you couldn't pull off one of these again in
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: one of the most like.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: You couldn't pull off Antions eleven.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: I'm so excited for the fact that that you know,
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: they said, probably had a warehouse hired, you know, a
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: big table out in the middle of a load of computers.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: You had the nerd working out how to get disgematics
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: in the place, did loads of text proper.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: Old fashioned ladies and gentlemen. This week we had what
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: could go down in history as the greatest heist.
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: Of our time.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: We're talking about the Louver Museum in Paris, France. Yes,
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: that Louver Museum. Yes that powers France was robbed this
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: weekend by what is being described as a highly trained
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: gang of what I can only assume is really handsome men.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: Or for that's a first thought into my mind.
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: There's webinar playboys.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: They're all absolute crackers and blokes. And there's one cracker
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: of a woman, like you know what I mean, there's
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: just one and she's probably the most nimble one of
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: all of them, like you.
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: Know, like she's like she's psycho trigger happy. They have
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: to get stop her all the time from shooting. Everybody
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: in machinity is.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: Like no Mary Anne. Stop.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: But one of them has a pastor relationship with her
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: from back in the day, like and she has a
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: nickname like you know, fucking Buzzsa or rebar or something
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: like that, you know what I mean.
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: Like Mary Anne, she is good with the lock picks,
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: but they now.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: And then she will pick your heart and the tear
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: that stomp it into the earth. By the way, for
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: any of our American listeners, if we have some, that's
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: the louvery. The louvery the louver that actually sounds so
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: doublin when you say it, I mean, it's the damnedest.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: Thing to because like you know, this started a filter
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: through at the weekend. That Sunday morning, the louver was robbed,
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: so it was closed all day Sunday, and it started
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: to come reports that the louver shut the day because
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: of her robbery that took place. And my initial reaction
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: was someone stuck their hand in the tail at the
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: gift shop and got like six hundred francs and fucked
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: off out the door. And then it became no, no,
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: they robbed a couple of bits and pieces, and I'm like,
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: all right, okay, one of these just stop oil things
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: that they didn't rob anything. They will through orange paint
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: on a paint and just and then you know, the
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: newsreaders sat me down and said no McBride, you stupert
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: bastard gang of guys took an angle grinder to the
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: shutters at the start of the louver busting, smashed up
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: a couple of glasses like you would see in a
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: heist movie, grabbed actual crown jewels of France, and bust
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: off out of the place in high speed motwicks.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: That's why I got so excited, because when the first
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: when I read it about it's gonna be some shite statue,
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: it gonna be No, it's gonna be a shite statue
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: that means nothing to anybody. Do you know what I mean?
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: It's some past Mesopotanian possibly fucking you know the image
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: of a head that was. They took a canoptic jar
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: of someone exactly and lo and behold, these lads went
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: fucking big. They went for the snazziest, fanciest, coolest, tastiest
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: dressiest looking gear you can get your hands on. Well,
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: I tell you what, they still what they stole.
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: Give us what they stole, everybuddy.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: So they stole a tr and broach belonged to Emperor's Eugenie,
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: wife of Napoleon that heard Christ, an emerald necklace with
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: a pair of emerald earrings, because where would you be
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: come without the earrings, like from Empress Marie Mary Louise
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: are Mary Louise, Well it is Louise is if it's
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: a woman as a tiara necklace and single earring fuck
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: leads from the sapphire set that belonged to the Queen
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: Marie Amilia and Queen hort tints and a brooch as
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: a reliquary brooch between them. Pieces are adorn with thousands
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: of diamonds, thousands and thousands of diamonds. And as I said,
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: like there's there's emeralds in there, there's blue sapphires. They're
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: exactly go Google, I swear to god, they're exactly what
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: you imagine. Like the crown that they're after taking, that's
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: that is the.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: That is that is the that's the amazing one. They
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: stole eight pieces of tom but they told they stole
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: the They stole the crown.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: But dropped it on the way out.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: You gotta know that case turning up in the sund Oh,
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: get back to the to the lockerman, it's like, who
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: has it? My god, do you have the crown? I'll
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: drop the eighth Well, you can drop yourself in the
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: same Papa, I can't do a French accent time. I
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: always need to leave asta. But what can I tell you?
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: I'm just kiddy with excitement.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: It's it's I like that. At the end of the
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: President Emmaluel Mecon pledged the Louver would be redesigned as
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: part of new renaissance project, expecting to cost and this
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: will be all updated security. It will cost between seven
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: hundred and eight hundred million.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: Ye.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: Sorry lads, but that horse is out the fucking yard.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, do you know what? Well done?
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, wonderful time to go by security systems the day
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: after you get fucking robbed.
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: Tom. Here's the thing, right, we live in a world
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: of crime. We do live in a world of crime.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: Crime these days is shite shite broad and it's cryptoi
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: off and it's white collar. You know. It's it's the
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: kind of thing where someone steals fifty million dollars, never
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: know what's gone because he took a pennies at a
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: time from your pension, from millions of people, and and
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: and took that money in Or you get done for tax, sorry,
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: beg your pardon. Your tax money doesn't go where you
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: thought it went. That you thought that you're paying tax
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: money to build hospitals and it went to build bike sheds.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: This level of crime, this level of petty, I go on,
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: go and fuck yourself kind of crime. It is so
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: rare to get an actual, a safe crack and robbery.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: I love it. And because I get it, I like
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: we shouldn't.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: Go rob Your local.
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: Music should be champions.
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: Fascinated.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: But this is fucking class right, Okay, it's the French,
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: the fucking loaded anyway, the loads jewelry, the kings and
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: castles every from the place, so total down.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: Tom, I gotta tell you right now and anybody listening here,
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: I don't recognize any monarchary, any monarchy. Why do you
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: even say it? Any monarchy? He had any state. So
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: if you rob something from king or king or queen,
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: as far as I'm concerned, you didn't.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go. Yeah, I was going to tell you.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: For every diamond and every jewel that was in those crimes, Tom,
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: I can promise you these consts didn't have a receipt
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: one hund So what you lost, your shiny things, go
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: fuck yourself.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Ye ain't gonna feel You're not going to find any
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: pity over this. Side of the band lads. I'm sorry,
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: but anyway, they were in and out in seven minutes.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: By the way, seven minutes that is that's I mean,
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: you know often they go to make themselves look better,
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: they'll go, oh, you know, it's a very professional outfit,
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: the sort of office. You know, there's a couple of
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: lads just drove a fucking cartina through a wall. That's
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: an outfit. When they're in and out in seven minutes.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: And you know you've been to the museums, and you go, yeah,
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: I bet I could rob that. But then you go
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: you look about and you're like, I don't think surely
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: this has secured out the Innian.
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: There's no I was over with our friends in the
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: Terror of London one time. We were over and I
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: took a picture of the Crown Jewels and security guard
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: came over and he was like, oh my, oh you
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: we told you no foot logo free in here.
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: Sure I fucking calm down.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: Since the accent pile, Do I look like I'm used
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: to listening to use fuckers?
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, And there and therein lies the the what
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: you would assume was going to be the top of
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: the top when it comes to security, and this is
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: the louver. It's not just the glass pyramid. Like I said,
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: anybody will ever say it's like it's it's it's Versailles
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: is wrapped all around us, you know what I mean?
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Like there's a palace fucking wrapped around this thing. So
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: that's that kind of fairness.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: If you're going to get away from this place, A
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: high speed motorbike is not a bad machine.
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: Do it offen scooters? Which is so French? Do you
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: know what I mean? They went off on scooters, So.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: I mean there's a John Connord out of here.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: There's a million scooters in France, so that's you don't
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: want to jump on a high powered thing that looks
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: like all the rest The lads probably have an airbn
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: booked around the corner.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean again, Tom, this is
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: this is just levels of coolness that I'm putting on it.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: I've seen that they absconded and motorbikes and my brain said,
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: like fucking street fighters bombing.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: Up the Of course, of course you're not just like
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: no little twenty five season scooters. So they fitted in
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: with every other fella in the whole of Pais at
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: the time.
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: This is why I couldn't rob the lure of Tom.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: You show up, you know what I mean? Like you
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: did you do the pure vindiese let it go? But
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: it's time. But well, I I'd be honest with you.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Even the opening lines I was reading that, I went,
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: they broke in using power tools, and like, do you.
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: Know what I mean?
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: I'm such a love for the vault here, I'm.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Such a lover of power tools. I wonder actually what
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: brand they used? Like I would with a certain company.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? Would you doubled out?
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: Like if it's Milwaukee, fuck them, they're French and it's American.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Would you double it out? Ago? Our gear was that good?
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: It broke into the loop?
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I'm gonna tell you? You don't don't
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: bring a bosh to do a Milwaukee job. What I
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: will say for this time, though, with the power tools
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: aspect of it, is that even in a multi you know,
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: tens of millions of euro jewel heust in the most
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: famous museum in the actual world, with what I'm sure
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: was years of planning and the type crew of highly
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: skilled individuals. Even in what can be described as the
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: most successful sophisticated heist of our time. An element of
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: it still revolves around getting an angle grinder and sticking
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: it at the side of a box and just cutting
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: a while the sparks fly. You're watching your talk going come.
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: Come, come, come back.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: Man, Like every party, there's no fingerprint scanners here or
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: like that. Every now and then you got to get
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: the angle grinder too.
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: There's just so much of me has full confidence in
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: what you just said there, Like do you know what
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: I mean? I don't. I'm not going. I don't see
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: because I using the right tools and the right gear,
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: you'll get into anything, you know what I mean? And
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: I'm when I was reading them, like of course, but
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: of course they assume. They're all saying that this is
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: going to be broken down to parts, and so are
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: you joking me? Are you all the stones can be
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: hold off individually?
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: Are you calling me?
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: This crowd went in there with a shopping list, and
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: I guarantee you that it's hanging those Some of those
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: are already in like a sealed briefcase. When those hard
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: hard back briefcase on his way to some trillionaire in
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: Japan or the US who wants to put.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: On there on their way to some Middle Eastern prince.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: Now you said some Hollywood starlet for two nights. Yeah,
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: now you said it, So you.
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: Might I offer you a bobble from.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: Well, I have just wondering to go with it. That
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: will fucking do you?
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So there you got.
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: Crime doesn't pay.
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: We hope these guys are caught soon. We certainly hope
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: they don't go on a spree across Europe robbing everywhere.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: That would be dreadful and not make sometime to make it,
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: get it done. You know, in real life you need
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: power to I watched Three Oceans eleven movies. They robbed
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: everything before them and it was all very soft touch.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: You never saw Danny Ocean bust out a four and
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: a half inch grinder. In real life, you bring that grinder,
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: which you're gonna find a home for a part, you're
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: gonna find use.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: Of course, you are at the very at the very least,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Like I mean, plasma cutters, let's do you know what
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: I mean? You can get them on the small scale nowadays,
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Like this is very exciting. I just love that they
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: just I love that so much. Planning probably went into it,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: but they literally just went up one floor to a balcony,
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: and they were that were like the the like the
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: confidence of the French to go, yeah, nobody is breaking
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: in you. It is bally, nobody has audacity to break
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: into the louver And all of a sudden the boys,
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: I would I'd love to know their nationality, like are
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: they French themselves or the like? You know, are they
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Germans like getting it getting you know, getting it back
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: on the French like some bit like.
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: Could you know they come with angle grinders? Tom? They
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: could be from for all we know.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: Because yeah, it's true. Actually could be the same lads
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: that did the used to do the ATMs here.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: Might be, might be, might be we'll listen, time will
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: tell her with those lads. But that's enough about those
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: lads time, because we're gonna stay on the continent here
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: those lads nearly where are these lads for this week?
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: But no, no, no, that wasn't until we heard.
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: About this land.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Now there's that guy.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: You brought this one to my attention, Tom, another lad
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: on the continent.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: Don't you know?
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: This one brings me so much joy because this is
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: like I have one friend and they do they actually
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: live in Belgium and every time you're talking to him,
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: like it's so like there's some cluster fuck or some
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: sorta are you would just go and you're going, and
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: its life is that he just attracts these kind of scenarios.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: And this is in in South Germany.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: I'll tell you we're on the We're on the arts
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: to and insult the entire shanging area with our insults
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: this week, Tom, with our accents.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Well, I was going to lean heavily to Yallo, hello
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: on the last one. But I'll tell you one thing.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: I'm leaning in heavy too, yallolo on this one.
• 18:09
  Speaker 3: It's going to be an apartment block in Bavaria.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: Tom was beset by a very curious prankster stalker near
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: do Well.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Tell us some details.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: What is the thing? The whole floor were going off,
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: They were fume and all of them because what was
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: happening was basically, I don't know what you called it
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: around Joe Way or did you do it at all?
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: Or I suppose in towns they call it nick neck
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: knock and run away and ding dong ditch, ding dung ditch,
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: youngsters dinging the bell and legging it. And this is
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: an apartment block. I mean you're going to just have corridors,
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: so it's going to be easy enough to nab whoever's
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: at it. But fuck may this absolute salute was at
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: it for a month, doing everybody's head, and.
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: That would get between me and my patients. Tom, somebody
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: ding dong ditching for a full month. I'd have been
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: looking out the windows. I'd been like sitting up late,
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: sipping coffee, Misses saying to me, a ever coming to bed,
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm going to catch this lad who's ding
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: dong ditching for a month.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: Well here was the thing finally, because they called police
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: and everything like this is getting to that point where
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: different neighbors going. You'd imagine it would turned a bit
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: you know, hunger games on it, like a Lord of
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: the Flies. After while, people were turned on each other,
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: probably going was it you who fucking rang my bell? Deta?
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: I know, like.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: You know, ringing a bell and running away. There's an
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: extent of it that it stops becoming a harmless prank
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: and it starts becoming targeted harassment. And I've seen it happen,
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: so yeah, not nice. So I can imagine after a
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: month of getting dinged on Killery apartment residents in Bavaria,
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: Germany were ready to kill.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: Well, they were, I can guarantee everybody had some sort
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: of baseball batter broom handled by the inside of the door,
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: just waiting to catch this fucker, regardless. And it wasn't
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: until one evening one of the she's actually a shop
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: is in the same moment I was living in her apartment.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: She finally put two and two together and realized that
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: it was fact. And I'm going to give you the
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: German the German word for these fuckers. It's a neck,
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: not the schnecker. Not the schnecker.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Not the schnecker.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, one of the bastards. And I tell you one thing.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: They've caused me a bit of trouble myself in my time.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: Now myself tom and knocked the schnecker. For those of
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: us who don't speak German, tell us what it is.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: It's actually a naked snail or a slug. A slug
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: love this. So your man was whatever was on the plate.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: I'm guessing it was on the wall outside each apartment,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: whatever way the brass plate was, if it was warm
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: or something. But he just found himself zig zagging up
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: and down the wall, going over the door and they're
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: that sensitive. It must be like do you know like
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: the toilets where can wave your hand in front.
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: Of the little finger push.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: So yeah, so but you can only imagine that this
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: guy went slowly over. So it's like I'm gonna do
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: it a slow German ding dong, He ding a dong.
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: I'll tell you this is not the Schnecker. He was
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: slow enough that he ding donged an entire row of
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: apartment blocks, but fast enough that when people came out
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: were like with like cudgels and fuck knows what.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: They were like fastest as he was. He's just hiding
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: above the door of the above the arct drift going.
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: Take that, you absolute two legged bastards, because it's it's
• 21:32
  Speaker 4: it's also we were called a.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: Nick knack and knock and run away in This German
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: has a great it's just a great to hear this
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: cling little striker striker striker. Yeah, so it's a bell.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: Uh.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: There's just there's nothing not funny about how they're right
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: there or like.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: Sometimes when it comes to this lad and we've had
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: many this ladder down through the years, it is going on,
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: your buddy, We've had like animal vegetable mineral every sort
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: of year. You've never had a knock to schnecker, Yeah,
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: never had a knocked snecker. And sometimes sometimes it's it's
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: it's it's it's a big world breaking thing that will
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: get you into this ladd And sometimes it's a slug
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: crawling across a ring doorbell.
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: Well, that was the thing Lisa, this moment she her
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: horses had like rang ten seconds and she ran to
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: the ring doorbell to see could she catch it. And
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: even then she went back to the video and lo
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: and behold the bell is fucking ringing. And now she
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: thinks she's the place is possessed. It's a ghost or
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: do they call the do you know they called the
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: super who's responsible for these doorbells? Who do they call
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: because something is malfunctioned?
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: They're all, you know, ring the Wi Fi guy or something,
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: because these bells are just going off all night exactly.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: And it was only then when she actually what the
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: what are the evil that she was standing out there
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: at the doorway whatever way the light was shining at
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: that point she saw a being slimysh to share a
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: sleamy sliamish nail in Hockenhausen over the doorbell panel and
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: up and on the wall and down again onto one
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: of the other ones. It's like, oh, mine, God, it's
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: not it's so ironically. I'm guessing she ran around the
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: place ringing everybody's doorbell to tell them that it's just
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: Anctor Schnecker doing this. But at this stage the cops
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: had arrived on because or basically they put out a
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: statement because this has become famous now at this stage
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: that this demonized possessed for an apartment block was getting
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: wrung to shit and nobody get the bottom. So they
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: put out a statement.
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: A spokesperson for the Schwabach Bavaria police department the animal
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: had been brought down to size, talked about his territorial
• 23:56
  Speaker 4: boundaries would placed under a nearby street of coss.
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: I mean, that was very good of them.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: I listen, I'll telling you now that fucker was fucked
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: in the bin. We're out doing that.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: Like I gotta tell you, he you know, he would have.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: Been ready salted, very very you know, and they're they're
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: making their button. No, we we gave them a lovely
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: patrick grass to live on.
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Jury's out on that one. That's jury's out on
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: that one.
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's no not a hope. I mean, for anybody wondering,
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: you're thinking, I have a big problem with why I
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: have a problem slogs the amount of times I put
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: my foot into a whilly as a child.
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: I can't have that. Man.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: Oh, And they're inside the fucking squeege. The mother is
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: riddled below, she's grind or gross it in the old greenhouse.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: She are coming in with their big old champion teeth
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: and these fucking these absolute bastards are coming in along
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: with their fucking and they're chomping away. But as it
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: turns out, here's a hand. Here's a two particular things.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: If you have if you're bro let us anybody, and
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: you're sick to your whole of not just schneke Is,
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: but not the snake is, you're sick of the two
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: the fuckers. If you can get broken eggshells and break
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: them up and the one dot them around. Also those
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: good sharp pine cones from like Sitka spruce and stuff
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: like that, if you cannot them around, because they won't
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: go over the top of them because it apparently it
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: scrapes the ballocks off them, so they're just they'll just
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: avoid it and fuck off and eat somebody else, or
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: dragged their balls over your doorbell. Hey you've seen these nuts?
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: What nuts? These nuts, bitch as he just drags his
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: knocked the schneck a fucking balls.
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: Behind him over.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Your ring camera, nudging snackers take these nuts.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: Well, there you go, this lad.
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: We we welcome our slug friends or knocked snecker friends
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: into the pantheon of these lads.
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: And as you said, just half there, Tom.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you something, Jar, I'll tell you something. I've
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: said this before. I find fucking any podcas European or
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: otherwise right now that has this cup set of stuff
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: coming out.
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: We haven't even gotten to the fucking good bits there,
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean?
• 26:08
  Speaker 3: Like we know what's.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: Coming in the next segment, because as Tom mentioned there
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: with the ding down ditches is an activity that we
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: did when we were small, which wasn't yesterday. We're both
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: in our forties, man, I think we've got a combined
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: age of about ninety between us there and thereabouts. So
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: like we've seen some shit over the time, and every
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: now and then we look back on it. In our
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: closing segment called we Remember when when I was a
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: young lad twenty or thirty or forty years ago.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: We're very We're very continental this week, aren't we? Like
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, I sense we should wear like, you know,
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: specific hats, possibly e in pastries of sorts. Do you
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: know what I mean?
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean, as you mentioned it Tom, this podcast
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: right now, the only thing keeping me away from a
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: pan of chocola that's stuff.
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you told me not to be eaten.
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: Gordon had it, I had have a kinder right earlier.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: Does that make me?
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: Is that? Okay? Yeah, that's I mean, that's German. I
• 27:06
  Speaker 3: guess kinders German.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: But you're right, we are staying abroad. We are staying
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: abroad for what we remember.
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: Because every now and then.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: Something just shows up in your social media and you're like,
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: why is everybody talking about that? And then you learn
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: all right, okay, Uh. The World Sumo Championships took place
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: in London, England this weekend. Seems like a strange thing
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: that happened to him. But then again, four lads busting
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: into the Louver Museum and Robin the place was a
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: strange thing as well. Strange times we're living in. But
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: the World Sumo Championships took place in London. I couldn't
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: tell you who won some big zummu dude.
• 27:41
  Speaker 3: But here's the thing.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: Sumo has a special place in the hearts of people
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: over this side of the pond, because if you're a
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: certain age such as Tom and myself, you will remember
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: when they used to show sumo wrestling at late night
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: you on Channel four maybe BBC two as part of
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: some odd little we've got fuck all else to show
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: at half eleven, let's stick something on and sumo wrestling
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: was one of them. American football was another one. There
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: was a whole bunch of these odd ball sports from
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: around the world that me and Tom would have been
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: exposed to at an early age, and to this day
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: I would still have, you know, a little bit of respecting,
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: a little bit of love for them based on what
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: it was that we've seen back in the day.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: Would you agree to But this is it. It was
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: all come together on Eurosport, which we all remember Eurosport
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: and oddly, I mean it was Eurosport, but matter much
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: like the Eurovision, you know when you find Israel and
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: Australia in it, the same thing applied you. Sumo was
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: big that would be coming close to the end of
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: it or up the very top of the show, and
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: for whatever reason, I had no idea what they're doing.
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: By the way, have you ever seen the work that
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: goes into making the wrestling ring? It isn't just the
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: platform for the sumo? Oh my god, I never.
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: Thought about it. Is it not just a stage?
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: No, it is hand packed sent by craftsmen, like a
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: team of forty or fifty craftsman over and it takes
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: about what I can only say takes three or four
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: days to build out of this specific sound. It's ceremonial.
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: It has to be.
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: It has to be just so.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: It's a giant, big block of head.
• 29:25
  Speaker 3: I never thought about that time. I always thought it
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: was just.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: So, did I until I eurosports showed, do you know,
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: often sometimes to be the sport, and then they'd show
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: trained with fucking head like you gotta.
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: Tell you to.
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: I'm like, there was some lean times for sport in
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: the eighties, oh, in the eighties and nineties, and as
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: you say, they're Eurosport. And even if you didn't have
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: eurosport that likes a grandstand or that kind of thing,
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: you would pick up on these fringe sports where they'd
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: give you maybe a ten to fifteen minute segment or
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: sometimes full games. And now I'll tell you one that
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: I remember distinctly for a period of time, and Artie
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: did it as well.
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: They showed Australian rules.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. I was even
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: that was in the top of my brain of like
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: Aussie rules unbelievably athletic fuckers wouldn't really jump up onto
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: each others shoulders with no sleeves that they were all
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: wearing wife beaters.
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: They were all wearing the sleeveless tops and not for
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: nothing as well, you know, and I could take our
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: leave football and indeed any given sport, but like it was,
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: it was quicker than rugby, and it wasn't as you know,
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: there was more chance that I could bust down into
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: an absolute fight than Gaelic. Yeah yeah, I think it
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: just roll that statment around your head for a little while, right,
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: so that for the longest time, you know, in your
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: mind it's the longest time, but in actual fact it
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: was probably like six months. I was like, oh my god,
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: I can't not watch the Aussie football and like I
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: just made it, like you know, you know the way
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: your young time you make things. You're holding that loves
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: AZSI football. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know that's your thing
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: at school for six months, you're the guy that loves
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: Ausi football. And then after once it goes off the TV.
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: Once RTE two, who had been shown it for for
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: whatever fucking reason, decided to stop, then that was it.
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: Your your your time with Ozzi football was gone.
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: That was it.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Mine was the same with F one. I can remember him. Yes,
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: I remember being in primary school and I was like
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: one of two or three kids that were into it
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: and then would have stopped been shown at a handy
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: like they started moving it all around the world to
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: follow the money into into the saudist into you know,
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: Vegas and all these bass I'm like, oh, I forgot
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: it even exists now, yeah, you know, I was gone.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: But there are guys to this day that you know,
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: anytime we talk about the Super Bowl, the American Football,
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: the super Bowl playing, and you know, there's there's lads
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: that are about our age that will still sit up
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: for the Super Bowl o'clock in the morning and all
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: that kind of thing. The reason that they are so
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: into American football is in the early nineties, again just
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: to fill time, just to fill time. American football will
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: be shown on Channel four at like twelve o'clock.
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and some people just got super into it
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: my thing. And I think your sport was like I
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: think it would. It was on art. I think it
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: was a show that was on Art and it was
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: like like that. It was a Friday night thinger. I
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: think I'm nearly sure as well. But the obscurity I
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: remember seeing football or table football. Did you ever see that?
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: Like it was actually table tennis but with a football,
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: and the table was curved like it was actually curved
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: down like in towards each player, but there wasn't net
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: in the middle, and you just used your feet to
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: kick it over and there was a championship for it.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: And I can remember distinctly seeing this in your sport,
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: going this seems more interesting in actual football itself, and
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: more interesting than table tennis. So I'm down there.
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: Was a sport that I saw, I want to say,
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: And again, I only ever saw like fifteen twenty minutes
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: of it here I'm there. But it was called polodovasca.
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: That sounds very familiar. What's that polodovasca? And I think
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: in America they call it hilai. I think it's the
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: same thing, or it could be that could be me saying, like,
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: you know, football is the same as Olympic handball, because
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: they pardon me if I don't know the nuances between
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: high and pololapasca.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: And what it was was.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: Like kind of like squash was played against a wall. Yeah,
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: And the gimmick to it was, you've got this big
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: fucking basket in your hand. We've got like a bass
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: like it like kind of like a baseball glove, but
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: it's three foot long and it's.
• 33:29
  Speaker 3: Like a shoot.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: But you could buy those yourself. But you'd see people
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: down the park fucking the one hundred yards before the dog.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: Do you know what it is? It's it's it's it's
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: it's like a if you can imagine that the stick
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: that you use to throw your ball for your dog,
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: that you pick up a ball and fling it, imagine
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: that just only more vicious, and it was attached to
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: your hand like freaking RoboCop.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: If it is smart to think that, you're know the
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: scoop you'd see for picking up for digging into the
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: dog nuts, We'll say an extra long one of them
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: would kind of vented and.
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: You could use it to rock the ball around the
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: place that speeds of upwards of one hundred miles an
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: hour and all this kind of man shit. And again,
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: just for whatever reason, here I am thirty years later
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: talking about it on a podcast Tom, because it was
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: one of these odd sports that you know again, you're like, oh,
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: a lot of it. For me, Tom was like, oh,
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: I can't go to bed the Aussi football is on.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: I couldn't give a fuck about Aussi football. I just
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: wanted to stay up late. And this was as good
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: an excuse as any I used to find myself getting.
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: And you'd still still see it now you find it
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: on YouTube, no problem. But it used to be on
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: again my my love of eurosport.
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: It used to be the day, well before it became
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: still it became it was the husk Farreal World Chainsaw Championships,
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: and it would be a threem of a clip and
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: I literally would roar up the stairs to the outlet
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: to come running down for this bit if it came on,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: because this was absolute gold watching these monsters. They'd do
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: their bit with the chainsaw and then they'd have it
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: was the Lumberjacks Championships and it'd be won by some
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: six foot nine, thirty stone giant, you know what I mean,
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: one fag hanging out of his mouth, belly bucket swing
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: ax that would he'd cut a caaren half, you know
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: what I mean, like just and then over onto the saw.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: And these guys didn't have to what I loved about it,
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: But they didn't really have to be athletes. They just
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: had to be fucking animals, you know, ignorant animals. That's
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: what I really liked about that sport. Never saw it again,
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: didn't see it again for another twenty years until YouTube
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: came around. Do you know what I mean? It was
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: almost like a fever dream, Like did I dream that? No,
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: that was your sport?
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: You want a.
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: Fever dream, buddy, you want a fever dream.
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: Okay mm hmm.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: There was one sport that I fell in and you
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: couldn't understand the rules, like this was the thing would
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: find in new sports about the place. It wasn't that
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: they paused at this time and go like, oh, for
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: your viewing pleasure, here's five minutes on the rules of
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: this sports. But see, you were just like drop straight
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: into it and you had to kind of learn as
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: you went.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: Best to luck with this sport.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: Okay again, I want to say it was Channel four,
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: but it might have been BBC two. They were like
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: the sort of fringe channels of the terrestrial TVs, like
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: BBC one would be straight down the line BBC one,
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: and there would be a mixture of stuff on BBC two.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: All the comedy was on BBC two, for example, and
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: anything that was fringe was on BBC two. Same with
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: Channel four, and that was fringe, right, and that wasn't
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: for the straight down, middle of the road audience ended
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: up on Channel four. And they just decided among themselves, Hey.
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: You know what were UK channels.
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: There's a growing Indian population in the UK, so let's
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: do something on for them. And you know, even if
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: it's on a quarter to twelve at night, you know,
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: if they want to see it, there's no other option
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: to see it. So it's just easy money. It's easy
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: ratings in the middle of the night. So let's throw
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: on a sport called kabaddi.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: What was cavadi? It wasn't rapping up the pole one, No.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: Kabaddi, Tom, I don't fucking know what kabaddi was.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: Was it fighting with your hips?
• 36:52
  Speaker 3: No, it was fighting.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: It was fighting it was on ad job pat each other.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: No, it didn't seem to be a gold or didn't
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: seem to be like.
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: A cross line.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: It looked for all intents and purposes to me, like,
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: did you ever play we call it Red Rover?
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was sort of like.
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: That, only I don't fucking know him. But the thing
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: with Kabbadi is maybe maybe they worked.
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: This out and the kings and the jigs and the
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: reels down through the years. But when I was watching it,
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: as you were playing Kibati, you shouted Kabaddi.
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: Do you know? I like that?
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: Actually, just imagine running around the pitch just shouting. But
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: it was like that.
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: It was it was like how it was.
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: It was like it was like how.
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: Pokemon can only say their name.
• 37:39
  Speaker 3: That's the whole language.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: Remember Matthew Berry in in as in that Vampire's program. Yes,
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: and he would want to like they could all just
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: turn into a bat, but he would go that and
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: he turned into the past.
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: But yeah, but but but Cabadi was like I said,
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: it was. It was it was two teams. I had
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: to run with sides of a pitch or a fucking field.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: I don't know that this was like a square pitch
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: or anthing like that, and I had to I had
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: to run over into your side. So one player from
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: my oh that's red Rover team had to run over
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: into your side and then just kind of exist there
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: for a while. Well all your team just kind of
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: handled me and just like not topped or punched or
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: or tackled right like that, but just kind of harassed.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: Me a bit, just rang you at an unreasonable hours,
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: just just sort of like ring my doorbell and run away,
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: you know, steal my jewels.
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: They would just come up and be like.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: Geve Bady, get Bady, get Baddy Gaddy.
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: And I'd just be like, eventually you just sort of
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: goes all right, okay, well I can see where I'm
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: not wanted, fuck you and go back to your own side.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: And points would be distributed somehow based on this.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: Do you know what it's hilarious is that Kobedi is
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: probably played by more people given that it's India that
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: would probably play you know, association football worldwide. Like there's
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: just that many people. The big one for me in
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: your sport and probably I mean, we know we should
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: have no interest in it, but it was the it
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: was the winter sports were just electric for me. I
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: had no idea even down to like obviously the Bob Slane.
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: I like, what was the one? What's the one? Is
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: a biasterlon where they just ski on the flat would
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: have gone on their back.
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: For a long time, then they stop and the ping
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: ping ping.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, couldn't work out at all. I thought the lights
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: of what's the one with the brushes and the big
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: rock curling? I thought that that was purely like a
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: Nordic thing, like a Scandinavian thing. Or we stayed in
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: a proper shit hotel, which is a hilariously shut hotel,
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: you know, one of those ones. I think I was
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: telling about it. It was probably a grand old lady
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: of a hotel back in the sixties. But that's where
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: it still is. What They had a history of curling
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: in this thing and it was the best thing I
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: found out about this area in Scotland. And it was.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: But they were mad for these giant rocks and handles
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: drilled into the top from like hell, only for your sport.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: I would know nothing about this crazy, stupid fucking sports
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: you play with your brushes, but it was still played
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: there By all accounts that people had, you know, they
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: I guess they had fiberglass pitches or whatever they're called nowadays.
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: They and and it must be said Tom, like you know,
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: here we are thirty and forty years later looking back
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: on it, and and and you know, for all the
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: sports that were like your common sports and football, rugby,
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: this kind of thing which I wouldn't give you like
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: time a day for really to would.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: You know, you know about you know what I mean,
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: you know enough about them? Like yeah, but like it.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: You know, when I when I saw sumo wrestlers, you know,
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: busting each other and doing like a little sort of
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: shimmis and whatnot, and fucking people of mounds of dirt,
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: part of me just went like, oh, yeah, that's that's
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: a that's a banging nostalgia. And I reckon, there's a
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: large porting of our audience who are our age would
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: remember the curious sports you would fall across.
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: Here's the last bit of nostalgia. I'll give you that
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: your sports are all of them. They all seem to
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: have in the nineties, and I don't think they'd get
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: away with now would be a wrap up at the end,
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: and it wouldn't be a wrap upove and here's the
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: top sports and who won what. At the end, it
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: would be some europop musical kicking, and it would be
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: three minutes of fucking crashus and people getting busted down
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: the hill, fucking trucks, truck racing, flipping over, motorbike cyclists
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: flying over the fence, like people coming flying off their horse,
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: summer wrestlers getting their fucking wedgy, their tourbo wedging have
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: fucked into the fourth row, somebody dying as a result
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: of his fifty foot and it was all just some
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: nine to nine. It was just fucking dead occurring for
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: three minutes, and I was glued to it. Nowadays, you'd
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: never get to see that much fucking carnage on the
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: telly anyway, wouldn't I.
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: Will, I will say, Tom, I do remember the thing
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: I remember most from Eurosport is the water sports.
• 42:06
  Speaker 3: No way, I hang on. That was euro trash, right.
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: I knew your trash was going to commit because it
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: was in around the same time and both and equally
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: one was as fucking weird as the other one. You
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: consider what you're watching. It was like Europe is the
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: maddest continent.
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: I tell you, You do know, you know the euro
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: Trash is on.
• 42:25
  Speaker 3: What's that you're watching?
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: It's just on I'm waiting up on the sports I'm.
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: Waiting and then a flash of one taste with show
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: and the rest of the Jean being really gay for
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: the next half hour. Okay, I don't know what I'm
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: watching here at all, and so we.
• 42:39
  Speaker 3: Might come background, we might give euro Trash.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: As I think as content wirstling on they show.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: But no, Hey, plenty of people have plenty of memories.
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: So that's I'm telling you. But for now, that's it.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: I gotta go by one of Dublin fifteen's cheapest dishwashers,
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: so before I fuck off to say, here's where you
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: can find To find folks of the Tom and Jerry Show.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: You can find us on social media at Tom and
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: Jerry Jerry with g You will get us on Twitter
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: and indeed on Instagram. You'll find me at Jerry McBride
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: over on Blue Sky, Tom oh maney no E in
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: that his heart choice is Instagram.
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: If you whatever platform you're on right now, if you've
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: landed on this because you love the Louver and all
• 43:22
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• 43:24
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• 43:27
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• 43:29
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• 43:33
  Speaker 1: a comment if you like. I havn't time to read
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: the comment. Jerry is heading out the gap.
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna see now you go on vamp
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: there for that, so.
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: If we if you would whatever platform you're on, hit
• 43:44
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  Speaker 1: Instagram and to let you know we are. Jerry will
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: be joining me on the eighth November Over and Done Leary,
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: Not Far Future, Not Far Jewel Heist for a duel
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: heist of jokes during the John Done the John Leary
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: Done Leary Comedy Fest. You can get tickets on Tom
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: of Mandy dot com for that one jure. Do we
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: have any comments?
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: Yes, we did. We have Max saying thanks for reading
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: out his comments from our previous week. All right, Mac,
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: I can see this.
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: Gun running around again.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: Buddy, perfect, just a street spider man, just all point
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: that each other got you exactly exactly.
• 44:30
  Speaker 2: Well, thank you very much for for listening. To make
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: anybody else wants to chime in, please please give us
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: a who and indeed a holl r com I gotta
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: go these this this this museum Roberts Alf Buddy, listen
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: to that dog.
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: Jewels won't fence themselves, Paul.
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: The dog I think is when Nickel schtick or whatever
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: the fuck it's called. She's trying to rink the door
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: ball now.
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: This day, so we're gonna have to guard right.
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: Good love, good