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THE PLEASURE BUTTON NOBODY TOLD YOU ABOUT · Erotic Spirit Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Add the word trauma.
• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Some people say, but I didn't have any trauma.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody touched me inappropriately.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: But if you didn't feel safe in your home when you were one, two, three, seven years old, if you didn't feel heard, if you felt ignored, if you felt abandoned, that's traumatic.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: And that's an unspoken, it's not obvious.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: If you had to be quiet and you couldn't share how you really felt because nobody asked you, that's a silent trauma.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: Gabur Mate talks a lot about this.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: The creator of Compassionate Inquiry, I did his training, and he talked a lot that the unspoken trauma, the abandonment or neglected form of trauma is even more um traumatic because it's unspoken, unexpressed.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_04: This podcast discusses sensitive and sexual topics that may be triggering.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_04: Please understand we are not therapists.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_04: We are simply sharing from our own journey and experience.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_04: Welcome to Erotic Spirit Podcast.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_04: My name is Angela Shelby.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_04: I'm Jenna Lee.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_04: And we are so absolutely excited and honored to have Michelle Alva with us today.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_04: And we are going to be talking about the male prostate, male health when it comes to that, and male pleasure when it comes to that.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, so excited.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_03: And Michelle Alva is a sacred sexuality and intimacy mentor with a 30-year background in physical therapy, pelvic floor specialization, and a focus on shifting our mindset from fear to love.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_03: She has spent the past 30 years studying the science of love and deep human connection.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_03: She was guided to create the Alva Method, a process of self and soul discovery that empowers men, women, and couples to embody love acceptance in our radiance.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_03: And here we have Michelle here, live with us.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I would love to jump in and share with us more about you and how you got into what you're doing now and how did it all start?
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_03: Well, thank you so much for having me.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: And thank you to everyone that's listening because we're gonna talk about some things that aren't usually spoken about.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: So be ready for some massive healing and just bringing conscious awareness.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I started um, well, the the reason why I do what I do is because when I was 15, I had sexual trauma, non-consensual sex, my first experience.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I was raised Catholic and very strict masturbation.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't do till I was 38 years old.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: True story.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: And the pelvic area is a part of the body that I know very well for men and women, thanks to my own neglect of my own sexual energies, sexual anatomy, sexual body, relationship to my sexuality most of my life.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I know what it's like to live suppressed, full of shame, full of guilt, uh, judgment, and self-loathing in my body, especially my genitals.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so my journey began in trauma and feeling very disconnected.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm grateful for it because today I guide men and women to whole body orgasm and empowering people as I have empowered myself, and I feel more connected to my divinity, I feel more connected to my soul through my body in knowing myself as a sacred body temple rather than a whole and a disconnected, dissociated person.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And so I feel very fulfilled today.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: And my journey led me to yoga, physical therapy, um, tantra, becoming a hypnotist, a psyche practitioner, an energetic healer.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so I really feel that all of our challenges in our life are there as a blessing if we choose to see it that way.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what love does.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: Love causes us to grow.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: So I started as a physical therapist 30 years ago, graduating, and my journey has my it's really all for me.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: Everything that I've done is really for me to discover the love that we always have been.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm so grateful to be here today and to meet you both and connect with you here and the fact that you wanted to bring something more for men, because I never thought that I would be working so deeply with men, literally in the deepest parts of a man's body.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm so grateful for it.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I really wish we had so much more for men normalized.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because we live in this world where there's feminine empowerment, feminine empowerment, awaken your feminine body, which I have a program called Awaken Your Feminine Body.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: However, it turns out that men are actually not that aware of their whole body orgasmic abilities.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, I don't know if men know that they can have 10 to 15, 20 whole body orgasms before they ejaculate.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where I come in and remind men and their partners of what they're able to experience where they don't even know about their prostate, for example, what that is, what is its purpose.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm really grateful to be here.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: And however, we can talk about things that are not talked about, um, I'm here.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_04: I have to say, I love that.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_04: I love what you said about I never expected to be helping men in this way.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_04: And considering where you started your sexual journey in life with trauma from men, and now on the flip side of it, you are empowering men and making them understand themselves better and feel themselves better instead of being afraid or resentful.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_04: Like you have become a part of the solution.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_04: And I think it's so commendable.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_04: Like it, it just you saying that, I was thinking what a staggering journey that is.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, I mean, I every time I have a compassion for men, because if I had, and thank God I have my flute here by chance.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: If I had something sticking out of my body that had 6,000 nerve endings for pleasure and the tip, I mean, I would be wanting to poke it everywhere.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: Passion for men, especially if you see someone that you're attracted to and in your pants you can't control it, and it's kind of nice that it has its own mind, you know, um how it could get and then it caused.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: So I can't even imagine.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so grateful that I have only a vagina because it's internal if I get wet and if I get aroused, nobody knows about it, you know?
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: So wearing, um, I have a lot of compassion.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: I've thought about that before.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I wish I had a penis to wear for the day that had its mind of its own, you know.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: Just I think every woman actually would benefit a lot, and we have a lot more compassion, and that's what I have.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: And men can feel that.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: So I hope that wasn't TMI.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_03: No, I love it.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_03: I love it.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_03: And and let's talk about let's talk about prostates.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_03: Let's talk about whatever you want to share.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm so interested in there's such a stigma, and like how do we evolve past it, you know?
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: So, what however you want to share with that?
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm I would like to speak to women and men about the prostate here.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna act as if you didn't know anything about it.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um practical, simple way where it's not gonna intimidate you.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: But basically, you know how we talk a lot about the G spot for women and massaging the G spot, how women can have whole body orgasms once they relax and open up more to their G spot.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: We talk a lot about that.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: I feel I don't hear as much about the prostate.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: So a the prostate is a gland as is the G spot for a woman.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: The analogous part for a man is the prostate.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: So when I share about the prostate, this is what I talk about, and it's a gland that makes the liquid, where when a man ejaculates, the sperm is the ejaculatory fluid and the prostate liquid.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: So both of these liquids are ejaculated out of the body, and sperm could not live if they when it hits the air, it would not be able to breathe if it didn't have the liquid.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: So the prostate is a very important gland for procreation to have sperm to swim in and travel up into the vagina to fertilize an egg, and so it is a very important gland.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_00: And when a man relaxes his tail, his tail part of his body, his buttocks, and that whole surrounding area, a man is able to relax more and open more to experiencing the pleasure of his G spot, which is the prostate.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: And the way to palpate that is you can touch on the outside of your body, gentlemen, behind your testicles in front of your anus, there's that smooth part.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you press into it with your index finger and middle finger and open up your legs, laying on your back, from the outside, you can palpate the prostate from the outside, behind your testicles in front of your anus, pressing into that area.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: But for a man to feel it internally, that would require going into the anal opening.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: And when a man is laying on his back, that means you know, inserting your finger into the anus, and about two, you know, joints.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: This is my first joint, second joint, so first joint, second joint of my finger, about that area is where you would feel the prostate palpating it if you were wanting to explore your own prostate or for partners to explore.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a very gentle opening, surrendering.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's a feminine energetic experience for a man to be penetrated.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I feel as though every man that is penetrated through his finger, through his anus, gets to really experience what a woman, the closest thing to what it feels like to be penetrated.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: So it causes men to really be vulnerable, surrendered, which a lot of men are used to doing, doing, going, going.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: So on top of that, having a prostate massage, when the finger slides into your anal area and experiencing pleasure through that part of the body, that impacts the vagus nerve, which helps to awaken the whole body, not just the external, which the superficial pleasure nerve is the pendal nerve.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: When a man is stimulated at the tip of his penis on the outside of his body, um, that's a more superficial pleasure nerve.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: So when you're penetrated and you're massaged in the prostate area for pleasure, you are experiencing a deeper release of the pleasure hormone, and the whole body is stimulated, not just the external superficial nerve.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's a very healing, deep, pleasurable part of the body to process also old traumas, memories, things that we held.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: For example, if we're birthed to seven years old, had any type of fear, sexual trauma.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of men have had sexual trauma or inappropriate touch.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't think, you know, women, we talk about everything, but I've worked with a lot of men that have been touched inappropriately by their grandmother, by their babysitter, and it's almost like they're supposed to act cool or they think, or even losing their virginity.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: And it was with an older woman, or they didn't want it to happen, and they had to be cool.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a lot of things that happen that cause their anus, their butt, you know, their buttocks to tighten up.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then they're walking around with a tight ass.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: You know how people say, You're such a tight ass, or you have a pain in your ass, you know.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do have a pain in my ass, my grandmother, you know, or my babysitter.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a lot of unprocessed.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: This is why I promote couples massaging the inner thighs around the anus, behind the testicles.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: I tell couples to lick behind the testicles in front of the anus, lick around the anal area, blow, caress.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's a very sensitive part of the body.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so the more you can create pleasurable experiences, like my hair, for example, you know, this feels amazing around the booty, um, or just even sliding your nipple, sliding your breast in between the butt cheeks.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, when was the last time you just kissed your partner's butt?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: And you might be like, Wow, Michelle, I wasn't expecting all that within the first five minutes of the interview.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_04: Because how much I wanted I wanted to ask, I want to go back to a point you made that you said that, because we were talking about like the stigma of it.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_04: You said that it can be a very feminine energy experience for a man because he's being penetrated.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_04: And you also said that he can store a lot of trauma in his prostate and that anal area, whether trauma happened in that actual body part or not, that you're saying in your experience, that is a place that holds trauma.
• 14:16
  unknown: Yeah.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: And so trauma, it's I would I would think yeah, add the word trauma.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: Some people say, but I didn't have any trauma, nobody touched me inappropriately.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: But if you didn't feel safe in your home when you were one, two, three, seven years old, if you didn't feel heard, if you felt ignored, if you felt abandoned, that's traumatic.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: And that's an unspoken, it's not obvious.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: If you had to be quiet and you couldn't share how you really felt because nobody asked you, that's a silent trauma.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: Gabur Mate talks a lot about this, the creator of Compassionate Inquiry.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: I did his training, and he talks a lot that the unspoken trauma, the abandonment or neglected form of trauma is even more um traumatic because it's unspoken, unexpressed.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that's interesting.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: So a dog, when he's afraid, it's very obvious their tail goes down.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: Humans, we can't really tell if our tail is down, but you can when you do bod and when you palpate and you touch your own buttocks.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: You could sometimes people have a lot of pain there.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: There's men that have painful testicles, there's women that have vulvadinia, painful vulva, the outside.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of recurrent yeast infections or UTIs or men that have um prostatitis, prostate cancer.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: That's a blockage, that's a holding.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: And there's a lot of men with prostate cancer.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's just there's way too much happening where we're just not addressing the trauma, the ignoring whatever happened there, or the shame.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: So go ahead.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_04: That's no, that's okay.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_04: But that's that's one of the things I think that to for men to have that experience of being vulnerable, being penetrated, even though there's the promise of great pleasure, especially in a place where they are holding their trauma so it feels like uber vulnerable, whether they realize it or not, I think that is part of the stigma.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_04: You know, it's that wanting to defend that piece of themselves and to have that vulnerable experience.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_04: Uh I think that would be part of it.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_04: Do you think men also like heterosexual men fear being considered gay if they like being penetrated?
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_04: Like, oh my gosh, am I gay or am I not gay?
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_04: I really like something up my butt that feels really good.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_04: What are your thoughts on that?
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: Those men, if you're one of those men that you're heterosexual, you're like, am I gay?
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: You're very smart because your anatomy supports that part to be pleasurable.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: So actually, the more a man connects to himself, he then connects to the pleasure of his body.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: His intuition will guide him to discover more of that area.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: Something I would love to mention is if anybody just take your hand, you know, the greatest thing you could do, man and woman, is touch yourself.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: When you touch yourself, anywhere in your body, you're stimulating the love hormone.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: So take some coconut oil and put your hand, and I'm gonna do this.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: Is this gonna be video shown?
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: Because I'd love to do this.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: Is it okay?
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_00: So put your hand on your and just say, I'm so grateful that I have a tail that is full of pleasurable nerves, that if I stroke them here, you're actually stimulating your healing hormone.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: So we have a lot of nerves around the anal area.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: There's a reason why Creator made us this way.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and if you just stroke around your anal area, man or woman, you're actually calming your nervous system.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_00: And we have a lot of pleasure nerves concentrated there and your jaw.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_00: So a lot of people with TMJ, they're just they have very tight asses, their tail is down, so you can have all this internal jaw work with physical therapy, or and you can also get your booty massaged and learn tantra and learn prostate massage.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_00: But who's talking about that, right?
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if he's talking about it enough.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: You can't just work on the jaw, the jaw is a symptom of something deeper.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's not just the jaw.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm here to let everyone know whatever's happening in your jaw is happening in your ass.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I like to just talk like that because it's time for us to talk about it.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_00: There's people that go get TMJ, TMJ, tons of sessions, but then they learn how to relax and really relax their tail and their jaw relaxes.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yeah.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: So thank you for allowing me to share that.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_03: This podcast is sponsored by My Awakening Within.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_03: If you are looking for some sort of practice to drop into your pleasure, to reconnect to your body, to start to build and cultivate safety from within, join me on this online self-guided journey where you will start to learn breathwork techniques, emotional release practices, and start to build this foundation of safety and security from a place of presence.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_03: So join me online, myawakeningwithin.com or linked in the show notes.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_03: I love that you sharing or you're starting to share all these connections to men's health and trauma and the prostate, and it's all interconnected.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_03: Like I know from a woman's anatomy, what I've gone through, but it's interesting how you even just touched upon different things with you know, cancers or different health issues.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know if there's anything deeper you can get into with that too.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, cancer is a tumor.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: Just remember, tumors are lack of flow.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_00: And when you, for example, let's just say you're a man and you're a boy and your mom caught you masturbating, or you're watching porn, which a lot of people usually they don't share.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, I'm watching porn, mom.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: You know?
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I love porn, you know.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's a very taboo.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_00: And the thing is, when you watch porn, of course you're gonna want to watch pornography when you're a teenager, you know what I mean?
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's so out there, but the thing is you're overusing the connection of your vision with touching your penis.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_00: So I have to use my flute again.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_00: So with pornography, you're looking at the screen and and you're stimulating yourself, and it's more of a mechanical stimulatory superficial nerve, which your heart is not in that whole equation.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: So you're actually learning how to not include your heart in your sexual experience, pornography.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: So pornography is not empowering men or women, whoever's watching it, and it's making you connect to a person that you know nothing about, so there's no emotional connection.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: And if we look at the science of orgasm, we're designed to have love in and connection and bonding in our sexual experiences.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: So when when we're when we're using pornography, we're actually going against our authentic nature.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: We're not being human beings.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: And so it there's actually something called erectile dysfunction that is caused by pornography.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Induced erectile dysfunction.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: And this is why I talk about how men are not empowered.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: There's billions of men watching pornography that are addicted, that are having those quick uh non-heart connected orgasms that are learning to disconnect from their humanity.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_00: And we wonder why the world is how it is.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: So when we learn tantric orgasms, when we learn tantra, when we learn how to get our heart on before we get our heart on, which is something I care, get your heart on before you get your heart on.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: And actually getting your heart on causes your heart on to even be more uh healthy and and it's not gonna dwindle.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: So a lot of men don't even know that they can have multiple orgasms before they ejaculate.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: They're just orgasm and ejaculation as one experience.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: And so when I think about a tantric man, a man that knows how to command his sexual energy, which is what I teach men and couples and women also in they they have a different type of orgasm and um that you actually are in your power when you learn that you can command your sexual energy and you call the shots, you're not a victim of oh my god, uh, you know, where they have no control over what's happening, and they're only having one orgasm in ejaculation, and so a lot of.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I wish I could talk more about this openly because I mean there's such a taboo, and I mean, I don't know.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'd love to know.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: People comment down below, you know, write to us what you thought of because it's time to talk more about it.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think men are really in their power.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: We wouldn't be having these things happening in the world just to keep it very neutral if there were more multi-orgasmic men.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_00: Multi-orgasmic men have compassion, they know how to be penetrated.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_00: That means that they're slower, they're more sensual, they're more in the energetic connection, so they're not pounding a woman when they're penetrating and overdoing it, and then the woman's just numbed out and dissociated.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: I work for women that don't feel their vaginas because their husbands are pounding them every day and they're not saying anything, and then they don't orgasm these women.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and the man only ejaculates one with one orgasm.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: So we're really selling ourselves short, everybody.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: There could be so much more make love in the world.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_04: You are talking about being having energy go through your heart center to have multiple orgasms.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_04: Am I making that correction right?
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_04: Like to have the multiple orgasms, you have to be able to run your energy through your heart center.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_04: And we're not talking about you have to have a partner or you have to have an object of your affection or your desire.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_04: You can run energy through your heart for yourself.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_04: You know, it doesn't have to, it doesn't have to be something outside of oneself, I guess is what I'm asking and would like to clarify.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_04: It's an of running the energy.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: And so, gentlemen, when you're looking at a screen to get your arousal, you're not empowered.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: When you're depending on your partner to stimulate you, to arouse you, you're depending on the outside.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't empower you.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: A person that is connected to their sexual energy expanding, like ourselves, you are the source of your orgasm.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: You are the party, you know, you are the celebration.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_00: And you know how to breathe in a certain way that is gonna cause that to happen.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: You're no, you know how to contract your pelvic floor, you're relaxed in your genitals instead of chronically tense and tight.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_00: So that's that's the secret is first of all, having a willingness and openness to be orgasmic.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: Because believe it or not, everyone, some of us are afraid of our whole body orgasmic, amazing beingness.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_00: We're sometimes suppressing our power because we're not used to be fully expressed, like the people.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: Where some of us are not used to taking up our space.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: If our parents said, be quiet, stop crying, go to your room, and we felt we suppressed ourselves, that's not gonna be a person saying, I want to learn horrible body orgasm, I'm ready to be multi-orgasmic.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_04: Especially, yeah, well, I was especially if you have a member of your body that every time you feel orgasmic makes itself really known, or you feel desire.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_04: So I'm sure a lot of men, especially growing up, just period, even if you had a very pro-happy, pro-sexual family, like you were saying, you know, being out in the world and you're 15 and you pretty much feel like having an erection all the time, you know, having it out there is embarrassing.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_04: So it's a natural cultural thing to be like, I've got to hide this or push it down, or I don't want anyone to know.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_04: I would think, at least in our Western culture, that would be a trait for what, 98% of the men of the world?
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_04: Like, honestly.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, I feel there is a, I mean, I don't want to talk too, maybe I should just be careful here.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um, why is it that we're not teaching every man about whole body orgasm?
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: Amen.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: Mm-hmm.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: I started thinking for myself, you know, when I became an orgasmic woman at age 38, 39.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I didn't even masturbate till I was 38.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: I thought it was a sin because I was raised Catholic.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_00: You hear the Virgin Mary and idolize the Virgin Mary, virgin, virgin.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's all these subconscious programs that we hear.
• 28:00
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't even know that was my my vote vagina was for me.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_00: I thought it was for my husband.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_00: I was not even thinking that I could make the time for my own pleasure.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like, why would I do that?
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I was a pelvic floor physical therapist.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_00: Knowing about the pelvic floor, you would think I would know a little better.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm so grateful that I learned about Tantra, whole body orgasm for women and men, and learning more about how when you are more orgasmic and connected, that means that you process your emotions.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: That means that you heal.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: This is your sexual energy, is your healing energy, and it causes a psychedelic experience, the same brain centers when a person is having a psychedelic experience with mind-altering substances.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_00: You can actually induce that same psychedelic, the neurochemistry of it naturally with tantric breathing and tantric exercises.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so you can induce this oneness, bliss, oh, whole body experience where you feel like you know how we we have sex sometimes.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: We're like, oh my God, oh my god, oh my god.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_00: And but at church, sometimes you're like, hallelujah, Lord! You know how people have oh, they're shaking, um, and having these oneness experiences, whether it's through sacred sexuality or at church, um, the Baptist church, you know, when they're singing and dancing, and so they're the same brain centers you can induce in these two separate activities.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's amazing.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_00: There's a book, God, Sex and the Brain, um, that this man, I'm forgetting his name right now, but that's what he the whole book is about.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_00: How sexual uh orgasm is God-like experience when you have your heart in it, and maybe God's way of helping us to relieve low back, to harmonize our hormones.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_00: When uh when we have orgasms, we're harmonizing our hormones.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_00: And there's a lot of this menopause, hot flashes um for men and women, but I really think it's the body saying, I want to make a love, you know, nobody's touching me enough, and I'm not orgasming enough.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because I do everybody, I'm turning 53 in a couple months, and there's no hot flashes happening.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not doing anything, I don't even think of those words because I'm a juicy, orgasmic, radiant woman.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_00: Those are the labels I put myself under, and I like those labels.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_04: I'm so talking about talk.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, go ahead.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_04: Sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: Think about yourself, you know.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_00: You're I want to say, like, make love as if your life depended on it.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_00: Make love a priority, not just people making love, make love, love on yourself, touch yourself.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_00: And this is where I talk about the science of love, forgiveness, compassion, acceptance.
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_00: There's a whole list of activities, humming, meditation.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_00: So if anybody wants to learn more about that, just reach out later on.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_03: I have a thought on was coming in on erectile dysfunction.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_03: And I feel like while we have you, I'd love to see from a tantric perspective, energetic perspective.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_03: I think this is a big thing out there with men's health.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_03: And what advice or insights or anything that you can share with that would be amazing.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_00: There's many different reasons why men's have erectile dysfunction.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: So if somebody has a medical condition, a reason medically why, that's not who I'm talking to right now.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um, there's men that have mental blocks.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they don't have the shape of their penis, maybe they had sexual trauma.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then for them to open up and have that erection again, if they had sex with their grandmother, their mother, their babysitter, I know that sounds crazy, but it's happened way too often.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: Where what is happening, you know?
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_00: So if that man has sex with someone and is totally expressed, all the stuff that he's been covering up, when you're actually making love because it's so healing, it's gonna bring those memories up.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's gonna cause whatever you've been hiding to come up.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I really feel that's why we stay keeping it down.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_00: And if a man, for example, isn't as hard as he would like to be, and then the next time he makes love, he's worried that he's not gonna stay hard.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_00: There's this anxiety-induced weakening of the blood flow.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_00: Or if a man doesn't feel his heart is on and he's not feeling really genuinely connecting to that person for whatever reason.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, this is the reason why I think it's important to be with people you actually like, not just people that you want to have a release.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so when people say like we're casual, I don't know how strong your erection is gonna be, genuinely.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_00: And and that's a whole other topic, you know?
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: But you're hard on, I would say most of what I've discovered, and that's why I'm a hypnotist, 90% of it is mental.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'm here to let you know if you have no undiagnosed mechanical reason, 90% of it, maybe even 95%, is mental.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: It's your mindset.
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_00: So, what do you think about your penis?
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: Do you love your penis?
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: What do you feel about your own sexual commanding of your own sexual energy?
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, what do you think about sex?
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_00: You know, are you holding any traumas from the past or have you shamed yourself?
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: Are you holding any past uh unforgiveness, resentment?
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: Do you like your testicles?
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: Do you like how you smell?
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_00: Do you like how big he is, the shape of him, what he looks like?
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_00: So all of those things can be uh a reason why you're weakening your power.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: So remember, love makes you stronger, erection.
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_00: Love is compassion, forgiveness.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe somebody laughed because you didn't you couldn't stay hard.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's amazing what women sometimes women or men partners don't make them better, um, and then they're hurt personally, men are sensitive too, and then because of that, they stigmatize themselves.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like I've worked with clients that had a penile uh um lengthening, you know how they have these procedures, so many different things that because men think that size matters, but I'm here to let you know, guys, whoever really loves you, she's gonna love you.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: You're more than a penis, you're more than a size.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_00: Love doesn't stop for that.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just letting everybody know.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_00: Um, a lot of videos, like I was interviewed by this person once, not gonna say who it was, but she also made videos about size matters and she promotes enlargement of the penis.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just not true because I've met women that they're like, oh my god, I love he does the most amazing things with his tongue because he's a smaller penis.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_00: So I I say, What is the gift of his size, no matter what size he is?
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_00: And the other one sometimes women say he's too big, you know, it hurts.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: And either, ladies, that means that you have some tension down there.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: So don't blame him for his size.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: This is where Yoni massage, massaging the walls of the vagina.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, if the baby's head can pass through there, you know, don't blame him.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: Take care of your vagina.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_00: Let's work with I can help you with that too, ladies.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_04: I love it.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_04: I love it.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_04: That's great.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_00: If if she's happy, yes.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_04: If you had one takeaway to share with our audience today, the most important thing you could share with them, what would it be?
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_00: That you are so powerful that your sexual energy is your healing energy and it's your birthright to be multi-orgasmic.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_00: It is your birthright to feel bliss and awe and to feel your and your sacredness through your sexuality.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_00: If you really want to know yourself, if you want to do the deeper work, go to the deepest parts of your body and know that you're just one thought away from this reality that I've created for myself.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's just a thoughts that over time become beliefs, that over time become programs.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_00: And many of us have been programmed to not even pay attention to our sexuality.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_00: It affects your smile, how you feel down here affects how you look up here, and how you are.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_00: So you attract what you are.
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I got these flowers yesterday from my friend Luis Jimenez, the owner of Cacao Sol.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_00: He celebrated us for Mother's Day, the mothers, because I have a 21-year-old.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_00: And look at what I manifested, and it matches us.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so your life can be very colorful, your life can be very juicy and alive.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_00: And whether you're single or not, whether you want to ever have a partner or not, enjoy, get to know yourself, get to know your orgasmic self, your radiance, because that truly is what we are.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_00: Beyond our physical body, the size of our body, the age of our body.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_00: We are eternal, we are beings.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_03: So I love that.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_03: I love that, Michelle.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_03: Well, tell us, tell everyone where they can find you, your website, you know, um, if there's something, yeah, that you're so any things that you're running right now.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, share with everyone.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_00: You can just Google my name, Michelle Alva, A-L-V-A, and my YouTube channel will come up.
• 38:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I highly recommend just go to my YouTube channel.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_00: There's tons of guided meditations.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_00: You could type prostate masa prostate meditation, men, um, Michelle Alva, and I have an awesome men's guided prostate meditation that connects your heart with your prostate, with your sex.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I have over 120 meditations.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_00: So, what I recommend is look at the YouTube channel, watch some videos, and then if you feel a calling, if you'd like to learn more, I offer one-on-one group retreats for men, women, couples.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_00: Anyone that just wants to uncover what you may, you might be like, but I've done ayahuasca, I've done the counseling, I've done the chiropractic, I've done the physical therapy, but you feel still something is not integrated.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I tend to attract those type of people.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_00: Or if you're a couple and you want to be more tantric, more masterful in your sexuality, for the men that are like, what?
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_00: I can have 10 to 15 whole body orgasms.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_00: I want to learn how to do that.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_00: If I was a man, um reach out to me and maybe you just want to talk to me because you have all these questions.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_00: So I do these 30-minute breakthrough calls.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and just know that I'm a resource here.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_00: You're not crazy, you know.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody's got to talk about this.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm really happy that we're here.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_00: We're talking about it.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I just really wanted to come on to let you know I'm here.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and it's it is a very taboo topic.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I just feel that my mission in life is to help bring more vulnerability, talking about sexuality and healing shame.
• 40:05
  SPEAKER_00: So if people have shame, guilt, if it's really hard for you to let go of the trauma you've been holding on to and you're going to a psychotherapist, psychiatrist, rather than just be on Prozec or LexaPro or, you know, the I have clients who've been on these medications for 20 years, but then she has a super tight vagina, and you wonder why she can't orgasm.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not enough to just medicate, even just meditate.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_00: I do recommend people get to know your holes, get holy.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I know it sounds silly, but your tail doesn't lie.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_00: Your whole history is in your hole.
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_00: And the book that I'm writing right now is if these walls could talk, what would they say?
• 40:54
  unknown: Yeah.
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of us we have no idea because we have cut out, we have dissociated to survive.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're not orgasmic, if it's hard for you to control, to command that part of you, it's gonna affect your sexual energy, your your libido, your hormones, your digestion.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_00: It affects everything, your sleep.
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_00: So a person, they sleep better, they create better, happier, and you're not dependent on people.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_00: You are the fulfillment.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_00: So, this is what I really I think you can feel me too, everyone.
• 41:30
  SPEAKER_00: Uh I love it on the planet.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_00: I wish for us to care more about Earth and Mother Earth, and we will care more when we feel more within ourselves.
• 41:43
  SPEAKER_00: So, God bless you both.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like blessings to you for having this conversation.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I would love people to write to us.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_00: Please don't waste this interview.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_00: Share it with your friends, share it with all the men you know.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and let us know if there's any other topics that you want us to talk about.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_00: I love these ladies.
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so grateful.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_00: So I pray that this is the first in many shares that we could do.
• 42:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, beautiful.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_03: And Michelle, remind us of your your website again, too.
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_00: My name, Michelle Alva.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_00: Two L V I-C-H-E-L-L-E-A-L-V A.
• 42:20
  SPEAKER_02: But the YouTube think is better.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, I'm on Instagram, Michelle Alva Love.
• 42:27
  SPEAKER_00: So if anybody wants to learn more, you can just message me pleasure or orgasm on Instagram and send you the meditation, the prostate meditation.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_00: I have awaken your feminine body program.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_00: I have a couples tantra program, and I love working with pregnant women or women that want to get pregnant.
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_00: So I have abundant pregnancy program and sexy, sacred, sensual you.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's unlimited the creativity here.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm an insight timer, so I do live classes on insight timer all the time online.
• 42:59
  SPEAKER_00: So if you want to just taste it, it's free.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_00: Um, just reach out to me if you want more information.
• 43:05
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, ladies.
• 43:07
  SPEAKER_00: Great.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_03: You're so beautiful.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, thank you so much, Michelle.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_03: And it's such a pleasure having you on.
• 43:14
  SPEAKER_03: And so thank you everyone for tuning in today.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_03: This is Erotic Spirit Podcast.
• 43:19
  SPEAKER_03: You can find us on all the major platforms here.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_03: You can find us on social media as well.
• 43:25
  SPEAKER_03: Definitely comment below on any juicy things that are coming to your mind.
• 43:30
  SPEAKER_03: And bye for now.
• 43:32
  SPEAKER_04: So, this awesome podcast is sponsored by Enlightened Energy Works.
• 43:37
  SPEAKER_04: Would you like to meet your spirit guides or build a deeper connection with them?
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_04: If so, I have an online self guided course with simple exercises and recommendations to help you build your connection with your spirit guides in your own way and at your own pace.
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_04: If you're interested, please check it out.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_04: At www.angelashelby.com or click the link in the show notes.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks for hanging with us today.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_03: If you find value in this podcast, please like, subscribe, and share.