Latest / WOMEN MAJORING IN MARRIAGE / EPISODE #25 FROM DISCONNECT TO GREAT SEX!

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EPISODE #25 FROM DISCONNECT TO GREAT SEX! · WOMEN MAJORING IN MARRIAGE

0:02
Welcome to the women, majoring in marriage podcast with your
0:05
host Janice L. Vance.
0:09
Girl, if you are a married woman that desire is not just to have
0:12
a surviving marriage, you know, the kind that's just on cruise
0:16
control but actually want a thriving marriage.
0:19
You are in the right place. If you are engaged, this show
0:22
can inspire you to prepare for your marriage, before preparing,
0:26
for that expensive, wedding day. Oh, and all my single ladies out
0:29
there. There that are in their season
0:31
of waiting on God, to send your husband.
0:33
We've got something for you as well, girl, marriage is not
0:36
hard, but it certainly is work. So relax.
0:39
Get your pen and paper, and let us major in marriage.
0:47
Well hello to all of my queens and welcome to the women major
0:51
and marriage podcast with yours truly, Janice Vans.
0:56
I just want to thank you, ladies.
0:58
I say this all the time for continuing to rock me.
1:02
I notice that you all are watching these podcast and I
1:06
appreciate it. One thing I want to bring to
1:09
your attention is if you listening to this podcast now
1:15
and you do not See me interview on my speaker.
1:19
Perhaps you haven't downloaded the Spotify or the Apple app
1:23
because you just only hear the audio version and I think you
1:27
get more out of when you see the person that I'm interviewing.
1:34
It just makes it more so real. You get to see who the person is
1:38
and all of that. And I just thanking God for
1:40
connecting me with great women. The podcast is all about God,
1:46
blessing, how Consulting to other people eyes, getting
1:51
people on here, that will be able to strengthen marriages
1:55
their homes children, they finances or whatever.
1:58
That's what these podcasts are all about.
2:01
And today, I have a special guest.
2:04
We have never met in person. We just met here on Zoom.
2:08
So I kind of feel like this our first meeting but hopefully one
2:14
day we'll get to me and it just a blessing how God connect you
2:20
with people. Because the people that I'm
2:22
interviewing itself or two, I never met before.
2:25
And last month, I see what this month, I celebrated one year
2:31
doing my podcast, and I thank God for the And connection.
2:35
And I just believe that you need to always try to surround
2:38
yourself around like-minded people.
2:43
If you the smartest person, if you're the smartest person in
2:46
your group, you need to change start because you need to always
2:50
be grown and grown. So I am so delighted to be
2:54
connected with someone. That is a marriage coach that
2:58
can help strengthen me that I can learn from it.
3:01
That's why I call it the marriage major because As You
3:04
Are Forever, Mazen You Forever Learning, you haven't arrived.
3:09
There is no perfect marriage but we are all striving for thriving
3:13
marriage. That's what it's all about and
3:16
I'm here to learn. I'm here to learn.
3:18
I am never going to say I've been mad.
3:20
I have been married 44 years and I'm not going to say that.
3:26
I Know It All. I've learned that I'm still
3:29
learning because you forever see in season.
3:31
What was going on in my Twenties and not going on now.
3:36
So I'll Forever Learning, Forever Learning, but I'm not
3:39
going to prolong. I'm going to introduce to you
3:42
all. Introduce you to you all my
3:46
speaker, tynesha, Carlos. And Tiny.
3:49
She is from California, California.
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She is a child of God, he's happily married, 30 years. 30
4:01
years later, She's a Mama Pie, a Mimi of two.
4:06
Yeah, I know that Mimi is spoiling those children, right?
4:11
She's passion for Godly strong, successful marriage.
4:16
That's how God allowed us to connect.
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I'm all about people that are thriving, marriage and pour in
4:24
to marry that that that that right there connected me and I
4:27
start stalking her, I start stalking her.
4:35
She's the founder and moderator of strong marriage, Virgil,
4:41
Facebook, support group, for instant accounting term,
4:46
best-selling, author, speaker and marriage, coach, creator of
4:52
the Sexes. Dare, let me say that again.
4:56
She is the creator of the sixth. Damn that that make them make.
5:03
You want to really want to find out what she's all about, right?
5:08
It's devotion, the journal and the program that she offers, and
5:14
I'm not going to put belong anymore tab, I'm going to turn
5:18
it over to her and let her just have her way, whatever way Godly
5:23
her that she will bless the listeners that listening to this
5:27
and they will walk away with many takeaways.
5:31
And is all in your hands and knees.
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Oh wow. Oh wow.
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Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.
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Thank you. I'm so excited to be here with
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you and with all your listeners, I'll tell you what, I love
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talking about sex, but I'm talking about married sex.
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I'm talking about the sex that is ordained by God.
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The sex that is sacred, and it is an actual gift to husbands
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and their wives Yes. So I'm excited to be here today.
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And we are going to get into the topic of sex, it's a wonderful
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topic and I feel like it's a god-given mission for me to
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speak about because for us Saints.
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You know, I wish I could see people out in the in the
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audience listening but how many of you have ever heard about sex
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and a positive tone from the pulpit.
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Not many right? I mean I Have been saved for 31
6:32
years and I have not heard a sermon on sex from the pulpit
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besides, don't do it when you weren't married.
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So God has placed this, I call it a burden, but it's a good
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burden to inform the body of Christ and the world about the
6:56
good news of sex is so, Right, excited to be here.
7:01
Thank you so much for having me. You're welcome.
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So I guess if you're handed me the reins, I get to tell
7:12
everybody all the good news and go ahead with it, huh?
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Yes, it's all yours. Okay.
7:19
Well, so we were talking about disconnection and specifically,
7:26
what I call from disconnect to great sex.
7:31
Everybody wants what everyone in the world.
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If everyone I've come in contact, With Once great sex
7:39
more sex to have sex. Sex is a big thing but like I
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said before sex is something that's sacred and holy it is a
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gift from God and it is given to a husband and his own wife.
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It is something that is very special, it's very intimate.
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And it's supposed to be between a husband and his own wife and
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in that combines is where you have the greatest sex.
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I always say when I'm talking to people that husbands and wives
8:15
should be having the best sex of their lives, it shouldn't be
8:20
other singles out there on hooking up with each other and
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all these other types of situations.
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Ships that happen in today's dating scene, they shouldn't be
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the one saying that, you know, they are having the best sex
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because here in the body of Christ, we know the truth and we
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know that because it is actual gift for us.
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It is and should be the best relationship.
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The best experience for us and in his own wife.
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So a lot of people want to say well Tanisha, why would you say
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that Christian couples for any husband and his and wife are
9:04
having the best sex. Why would you single a married?
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Couple out from single folks who are out having sex Well, the big
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thing is that, like I said, it's a gift from God.
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I don't think I can say that enough.
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It is an actual present that God has wrapped up and has given to
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his body. The body of Christ and marriage
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is more than just that piece of paper.
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I hear a lot of people saying, oh, I don't need the paper, we
9:39
could just live together and this and that.
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But It's more than the paper. It is an actual picture of how
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the Lord wants to commune with you.
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So, when you begin to look at it like that and especially all of
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us in the body of Christ will understand the love that God has
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for us and how much he wants to be known for us to know him and
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for him, to really what he knows us.
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But for us to really seek out. To him and to know him, he gives
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us lots of illustrations in the Bible and with the institution
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of marriage, showing the death of his love and the, the Deep
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ways that he wants us to know him.
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So looking at marriage, we can see, you know, if anybody who's
10:34
ever been married married, you can attest to the fact that
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you're going to really know someone that person that you're
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married to your Living with them, your communing, with them,
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your fellowshiping, with them all the time.
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There's nothing that you can really hide at least for a long
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period of time when you are married.
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And that's what God is picturing here.
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He wants you to seek him and he wants you to really know him.
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So when you're in your marriage, I want you to remember that.
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And to remember that it's not really about you.
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A lot of people have The misconception that they're going
11:16
to get married to be happy, they're going to be happily ever
11:20
after. That's all we heard with the
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fairy tales, you know, you watch your Disney movies and, you
11:26
know, the princess comes out. And here comes the knight in
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shining armor. He sweeps her off her feet, and
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you get married, and you go off and you're now the queen and
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everything's perfect. Well, I'm here to, I'm here to
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tell you that. That's anybody who has been
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married, or who is married would say.
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That is not the case. Yeah, absolutely.
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There are times where it is. Bliss is a all the time when I'm
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interviewing, I am blissfully married, I'm happily married.
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I am head over heels in love with my husband and that should
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be how we feel. How all married couples feel
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about their spouse about each other and but There are times
12:15
where it's ugly, it doesn't feel good and it may even hurt.
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So that's how we get into the talks and discussions on
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disconnect. Now, what exactly do you think
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of when I say disconnect? What do you think Janice not on
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the same page? You exactly one apart.
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Yeah, yeah, and apart and then marriage that could very well
12:47
mean living like roommates, you're in the same house, you're
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living together but you disconnect.
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Yes, that's exactly it. You have a rift in your
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relationship and you have allowed it to just run around it
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and because to that, I mean she said it best your roommates.
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It's like, you know, I have five adult children, And some of them
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are in the process of choosing a roommate to live Wieck, is here
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in California. I don't know if you guys know
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but it is expensive to live here.
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The housing is out of sight. I mean, it's crazy.
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So I'm originally from Kentucky, so back in my day in Kentucky,
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he would move out. You get your own place by
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yourself and read it. We never thought about roommates
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the here in California, you're gonna need a roommate.
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So they're in the process of, you know, Picking who is going
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to be roommates and and you know working that out you don't want
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to be a husband or a wife and you are sleeping in different
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beds and different bedrooms, living separate lives.
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That is not what marriage is. So if you are listening to us
14:01
today, and that's kind of what you are experiencing please to
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end because that is not the purpose that is not the The
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design of marriage and you shouldn't be there.
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But don't feel like, you know, it's the worst thing in the
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world because you know what? I rather be a roommate then
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divorced. Okay.
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Because now you have something to work with you.
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It's not totally gone. So, you know, it's not something
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that you have to throw away, it can be repaired and that's what
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we're going to talk about now. So let me give you my story.
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So, So in year one of marriage, you know, after the wedding and
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we didn't have a honeymoon because I got married at the
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beginning of my junior year in college.
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So I got married on Saturday and then Sunday, I had to go back to
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campus to finish out some classes.
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So no honeymoon, but we were still in the honeymoon phase
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where everything he said was so cute and, and so funny and super
15:15
smart, and, oh, everything's perfect.
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And it's, you know, the Disneyland, princess movie.
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So, after a couple months, though that can were off if you
15:30
allow it, see what I'm telling you today.
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I did not know. So we allow that feeling to wear
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off. We allow the cares of life to
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beat us down. We were so disconnected in so
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many areas we weren't on the same page regarding finances.
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Nobody told us, we didn't know how to bring our finances
15:59
together. No one told us about that.
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No one told us we will be severely fatigued trying to live
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these lives, you know, apart instead of bringing them
16:11
together. No one taught us how to blend
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your life together. We were still having the
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disillusionment, you know, I'm thinking it's a Disney princess
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tail. He's thinking something else,
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but we're not sharing those thoughts with one another.
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No one taught us. How to Effectively communicate
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and why it was even important. So we're talking at each other
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instead of conversing with one another and understanding and
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relating to one another. Like I said, we had no role
16:45
model. There was not a marriage that we
16:48
could look to to see how it was done.
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No one in the Pulpit was telling us how to do it and we forgot to
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go and look in the Bible. Because the Bible has the
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answers for your life. So we totally in the midst of
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living me going to college and we had I was pregnant and he was
17:15
working and all the stresses of Life came pouring in to our
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fairytale. And so the Riff just keep just
17:27
kept tearing and tearing and we were going further and further.
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The part. And so one day, I felt like, you
17:34
know, maybe he didn't love me anymore and next thing, you
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know, we were in divorce court. And, you know, it's a horrible
17:43
feeling and it is, you feel so lonely and you don't get married
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to be lonely, you don't get married to feel like you can't
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express your feelings and be heard and they be validated you
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don't get married to feel like something's wrong with you, you
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get married to have your own private.
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No team your own cheerleader, your own.
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Rock Your Own Foundation but that Foundation is only solid in
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Christ. Yes.
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So if you haven't guessed by, now I am a Christian what she
18:27
told you at the beginning of the of the broccoli, and every one
18:33
of my answers, every strategy, every tool involves Jesus
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because really your marriage is not about you, it is about Jesus
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and showing Jesus to people. Now, you may ask how you going
18:47
to show Jesus to people with your marriage.
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Well, there are people who do not believe in Jesus, who come
18:53
to me, because they can see that my marriage is a success.
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And when I began to show them what I do and my relationship in
19:04
order to gain success, they might want Hair by Jesus and
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that is the ultimate goal of my life, my ultimate goal.
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Oh, is to please. Jesus is to serve him and to
19:16
honor him. And so everything I do in my
19:19
life, especially my marriage must be a tool in order for me
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to do that. So let's get to the fixed.
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We know what disconnected, this is, we know what the symptoms
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are, what it does to our relationship, you know and we
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don't want that. So what is the fix?
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So we decided, Well, we didn't, we didn't discuss.
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I skipped it. So the fix was after we felt
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like this or in divorce court, I was hurting.
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Divorces, is painful, it's very, it's like death, you grieve and
20:04
I just can't imagine, you know what?
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People feel like, when they actually go through it and
20:11
finalized. It and you now a single person
20:14
again. I began to hurt so bad that I
20:17
called out for Jesus and as he was healing me, I began to read
20:23
the word again. You know I thought you know I
20:27
can't push in reading the word and and praying back on the back
20:34
burner because I had schoolwork to do, you know how to get my
20:37
homework in? I got to read these other books.
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I don't have time to read the Bible.
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Like I did freshman year. I got more of a Of a workload.
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Now, I can't do that. He was off working, you know,
20:51
and he wasn't making much, but he was putting in long hours,
20:55
and so he was pushing it back. So, both of us for God Jesus, we
21:00
forgot to keep him at the center of our marriage.
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And when we did that, that's when we allowed all the
21:10
pressures of life to come in and smother us to make us
21:14
disconnected. To make those.
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Seemingly meaningless things in life like were did you squeeze
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the toothpaste from the middle or the top?
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I just to this day, cannot believe that I was so angry
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about him, squeezing the toothpaste in the middle instead
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of from the top and squeegee and down like that would burn me
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alive. Silly girl, just squeeze it.
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He can have his bottle. I mean, I, it would burn me
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alive and he would come in from work, and he would just get in
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and feel like, oh, I'm home and start stripping, and I would get
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so angry, like, oh my gosh. Look at this socks on the floor.
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His pants on the floor. He's going to take his underwear
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off and leave them there and sure enough they were there.
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I was so. Angry.
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But then you know the Lord spoke to me and said, would you rather
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pick up his socks or not have them at all?
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Honey, I was picking up the socks.
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I was hit. I was taking a look.
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Thank you, Lord, that day. I need a pickup.
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You've got to change your mind about - thanks.
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Yes. You know, you have to change
22:39
your mind, you have to have your own piece.
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Hmm. You have to have your own
22:45
relationship with Christ your own On peace your own joy.
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That makes you happy because just those can't do that.
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Your spouse is my God. Absolutely we are two people who
23:00
are imperfect trying to forge a life together and it's going to
23:06
be hard. It's going to be ugly, is going
23:09
to be stupid, it's going to be funny, but if your mindset is
23:15
we're on the same team and we're working This goal together, you
23:20
can accomplish anything. I mean, anything you can rebuild
23:25
a home, if you have to you can, you know, do the the work
23:29
yourself, you could learn how to do, all kinds of things, your
23:33
own hair, your old makeup, your, you know, find out how to make a
23:38
suit if you to have a goal and you do it together.
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I tell you what it is going to get done.
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Yeah. And little did you know that
23:47
there is a A Bible, principal it behind that about two coming
23:54
together about to agree and the power of God in the midst of the
23:59
two when they agree. So the fix, the first number one
24:04
in, the fix is Jesus, becoming your personal focus and you have
24:11
to be solid in your foundation with Jesus Christ.
24:15
And if you're listening today and you are not And you say, you
24:18
know, I need to know more about this.
24:21
Jesus that Janice and Tanisha are talking about, then you can
24:26
get ahold of us. You can email us and we will be
24:30
happy to introduce you to our best friend.
24:33
Jesus Christ. Yes.
24:35
So that's your first purse Focus.
24:38
You have to get with Jesus. Yes.
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And then as you get with Jesus, guess what?
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You're going to change your mind.
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And sets coming to change your thought process, your actions,
24:53
your words, your behaviors, you change.
24:56
Because when you're in the presence of God, it changes you.
25:00
Yes. When you begin to read the word
25:03
of God, you'll begin to have a different mindset.
25:07
You'll begin to think more like him.
25:09
The more time you spend with him, the more you will act like
25:13
him. Yes.
25:14
So your spouse is going to notice those Changes, and then
25:19
they will start. They will be, you know, inspired
25:23
to change as well. So as they see you living this.
25:28
They're going to want to live that too.
25:30
And that's what happened with my husband.
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And I, I was behind the scenes. You what we were in two
25:36
different households at this point, because we were in
25:38
divorce court and I began reading the word and get it in
25:43
God's presence and he was doing the same thing because it was We
25:48
were hurting, we loved each other.
25:50
We love each other, but we allowed things to make us angry
25:55
and pride keep us apart. So, as God soften his heart and
26:01
God soften my heart. That price, I did this to fall,
26:06
it just failed and I picked up the phone one day and and just
26:11
ask them how you doing? He started talking and y'all it
26:15
was like nothing ever happened. Wow.
26:20
We had missed each other and we loved each other and we wanted
26:25
to be together and it instantly. We were like we don't want to do
26:30
this. Let's stop this.
26:33
So we both told our lawyers the same day, we do not want a
26:37
divorce, we want to close this case and my lawyer was like, are
26:41
you sure? I'm sure we're at the end, we're
26:46
about to win this. I'm like you know what?
26:48
I'm already one. I've got my husband, yes, I've
26:52
got my husband, so I've won. So we left that day and found a
27:01
place together. Move back in dedicated our
27:05
marriage. To the Lord, made our marriage,
27:10
I priority, and then we got help.
27:15
So, you've got to get help. We began to listen to teachings
27:21
about marriage. We began to go on marriage,
27:25
Retreats, actually, we had a pastor friend of ours to send us
27:31
free. He paid for it all for us to
27:34
spend a weekend at a marriage Retreat.
27:37
Wow, he even had my mother to watch our baby, what we went to
27:44
this Retreat all weekend, and just really understood, hey, you
27:50
know, the way you communicate, it makes the difference in your
27:55
relationship. So we got help you got teaching,
27:59
we got Wisdom from the Bible. I mean that's that is the
28:06
manual. Yes we started reading and
28:09
really studying. What does it mean to be a
28:11
husband? What this of means to be a wife?
28:13
What should we be doing? Because we had not seen anyone
28:17
do it. Hmm.
28:19
So we began to seek out books from ministers who we saw from a
28:29
distance. Hey this this marriage you guys.
28:32
Been married a long time. It look happy let's let's look
28:34
into this and the late Apostle Frederick KC price has this
28:39
awesome book called like it's called The Family Christian
28:44
family, the Christian family and he really can break down the
28:49
scriptures regarding marriage and family even to like division
28:53
of the household chores. And I mean it was an excellent
28:58
book, he read that And we just began to seek out information
29:05
about how to be in a successful marriage and it's, you know, we
29:11
celebrate 30 years this September.
29:13
And you know, it's wonderful but you have to do the work.
29:19
What do you mean, Tanisha? What do you mean?
29:22
Well the work is. Number one, your daily time with
29:25
Jesus. That never stops because we
29:29
realize that once we We stopped having that time with Jesus.
29:32
That's when we began to drift apart.
29:35
Yes, when we began to feel like you fall out of love, but let me
29:39
tell you, God is love, he is love.
29:43
And there is no, that's a myth falling out of in and out of
29:46
love. No, it's not a feeling.
29:48
It's a choice. God chose to love us and he
29:53
chose to have a plan to reconcile us to him.
29:58
We must also choose no. How to work.
30:02
Just like God loves me. That's how I'm going to love my
30:04
spouse. God loves me unconditionally, so
30:10
I can love my spouse that way, and that takes a lifetime for
30:13
us. Yes, it takes a lifetime, we're
30:16
going to mess up, but then it's when you apologize.
30:20
And and I have several teachings in my group about how to really
30:25
apologize in and what that's all about.
30:27
Well to talk about that next time Janice, okay.
30:30
That's Sound, you know that that's the rules to an apology
30:38
and you really need to know what those are in order for you to be
30:42
able to mend that Rift that you've created when you to get
30:47
upset with one another so that your relationship continues to
30:51
grow and grow and grow instead of drifting apart.
30:56
So, so the work is Daily Time With Jesus.
31:01
Be your best self. Mmm.
31:04
Okay, so when I say being your best self, just because you get
31:09
married, doesn't mean you just let everything is over.
31:13
I don't pursue anything else. I don't do anything else.
31:18
I married, I made it. No, you keep getting better.
31:22
Yeah, and and that means you're growing in God, you you're
31:26
growing in your career, you're growing as a Parent.
31:31
You're growing as a friend, you're growing as a daughter,
31:34
you know, you're growing in your relationships, your growing in
31:38
your education, you're growing in every area you can think of.
31:43
So it doesn't stop people think I got married I attained it made
31:48
it. No that's the beginning there
31:51
any? Yeah and you want to push
31:54
forward so wives we are supposed to be the husband's help meet
32:00
How can you help him if you don't have any education?
32:04
How can you help him? If you don't have any wisdom,
32:08
how can you help him if you don't know how to do anything?
32:11
So that means you got to keep pressing in your own personal
32:14
life so that you have stuff to help you have to be an
32:19
ever-present help you draw from the ever-present help but then
32:24
you are responsible for making yourself better and continuing
32:29
to grow. So, the work Daily Time With
32:33
Jesus being your best self number 3.
32:37
That's where teaching and help comes in.
32:39
Because you're going to use tools and strategies to
32:43
continuously, build your relationship.
32:47
There are certain ways that you have to talk to people.
32:50
There's a love language that you need to know, not only yours,
32:54
but your spouse's, yes, your spouse recognizes love.
33:00
Beiler particular language that they have and if you don't know
33:03
what I'm talking about, need to get a copy.
33:07
That Gary Chapman, a child, Love Languages, yes, you need to get
33:11
that. You need to take the test.
33:12
Go online, Google five love language, test is free.
33:16
Take that test. Give it to your spouse that it's
33:19
your spouse. Take the test and figure out
33:22
what your love language. Yeah, mines is quality time,
33:27
that's mine. Yes.
33:35
So that is like You know, kind of like my third so it's not the
33:41
main way I show love I when I'm loving you, people know, I'm
33:45
loving you because I'm spending time with you and this and that
33:48
and I feel loved when you want to spend time with me.
33:52
Yes, so I, if I have a birthday party and I invite certain
33:57
people that I'm not allowed to huge parties, I found by some
34:00
people if I invited you and you come I feel.
34:05
I mean The love that I feel is so thick, you can cut it like
34:10
you cut that cake, you know, so that is the type the way I feel
34:15
Love's. So my husband spends time a lot
34:18
of time with me and I'm getting better, bless the Lord with acts
34:23
of service because it's a little difficult because it's not my
34:29
but I am believing God that I'm getting better and better every
34:33
day by just kind of like out thinking him.
34:37
Like okay, I know he's gonna do this.
34:39
What does he need to do that? Let me do it before him, but he
34:43
always beats me. I tell you what this man.
34:46
It's like, I'll do it myself. No, I'm gonna do it for you.
34:51
So we're literally right around a half.
34:53
I'm get to it first. I do it so bad.
34:58
You know, I could show him that man.
35:00
I love you, but he will receive that.
35:04
In his language. So that is very important for
35:09
you to know the language to show your spouse.
35:12
Love the way they feel loved. Yes, because you can say, love,
35:16
I love you all day long. All week long at all month long
35:22
and they not feel it. Mmm, it would be a real struggle
35:26
for them. And there's nothing sadder than
35:30
two people who love each other and can't feel it.
35:33
I feel it. You know, can't feel it there
35:37
their brains no the intellectually.
35:40
I know I know my spouse loves me but my need isn't being met.
35:45
You know it is a top. Need the love language is and
35:49
those needs have to be met. So we know what disconnect is.
35:55
We know the symptoms of it and how you feel, we know the fix
35:59
and we know the work that we need to continue to do.
36:02
What is the fruit The fruit of that, a great marriage.
36:09
A marriage that produces your best friend.
36:12
My husband is my best friend. I cannot wait to share things
36:17
with him. With something happens in my
36:18
life, he is the first person besides the Lord that I want to
36:23
get like, oh guess what? You know, he's the first one,
36:28
the first one I want to, you know, confiding in our ass.
36:31
What do you think about this? Or, you know, the First one who
36:35
I want to do anything with, you know, life is about sharing it.
36:41
You know, life is experiencing it together and you should
36:47
desire for your spouse to be that person that you want to
36:52
share with, that's who it's supposed to be supposed to be
36:55
God, then your spouse, and then your children, and your church
37:02
and Ministry and family and all that stuff.
37:05
Yes. It also produces lots of sex.
37:10
Yes. Effects.
37:13
So if you just tuned in to hear about sex, here it comes.
37:24
Be a gradient, mmm, a great sex life, which by the way, is the
37:32
ingredients to a successful marriage.
37:35
Is understanding number one. What member number 0?
37:39
What is great sex? What do I mean when I say great
37:43
sex? So here's the definition.
37:47
Great sex. Okay, well first of all, the
37:50
scripture says that the man leaves his mother and father and
37:57
he Cleves Cleves please wife So he leaves and Cleaves and it's
38:05
talking about it said, the two shall become one.
38:08
God is all about Oneness, the Trinity, the Father, the Son,
38:12
the Holy Spirit, but there are one everything they do is one
38:17
there on a cord all the time and that's what we should have and
38:23
see in our marriage. So how do we see that?
38:27
What's the good? Is it allegory or metaphor?
38:32
I don't know. An example is sex.
38:36
So we are three parts like these three and one.
38:40
So we are a spirit made in the image and likeness of God, we
38:46
have a soul which is our mind, our will, and our emotions.
38:52
And we live in this body. We need this body to live on
38:55
Earth but it is not who we are. This is kind of like our house.
39:00
So there's also so with those three things, You have a course,
39:07
we know the physical. This is what the world and
39:09
everybody's talking about when I talk about sex, just the
39:12
physical, but great sex is more than just the physical.
39:17
It is the spiritual understanding that we are one
39:23
because God ordained that and he is one, we are mirroring him
39:29
because we are created in His image and likeness.
39:32
So there's a spiritual, there's the mental And let me man a good
39:38
example of the Mentos. I'm watching this show and it's
39:42
like one of the most popular series on Netflix right now and
39:49
there was a scene in the show that I watched last night where
39:54
the couple were being intimate. But the man was thinking about
40:01
another woman and the woman was thinking about another man, and
40:05
they were having sex together, they were still cheating.
40:10
He said they weren't cheating, they were having sex together.
40:13
Nope. Mentally, melt a cheat.
40:16
It, they cheated. They're not even having sex.
40:20
They just did the physical physical.
40:23
They totally don't even know about the spiritual and and they
40:29
messed up the mental. But let me tell you something,
40:34
when you get those three working, oh my gosh, I have to
40:38
make up a new word for orgasm because it is so much greater so
40:43
much better, so much more connected.
40:47
I really believe that when you have those three aligned that
40:52
The physical body releases extra chemicals.
40:56
That Oxycotin the all the chemicals that make you feel
41:00
great and bind you I think an extra amount comes out or
41:06
something and there is a connection of bond that you
41:11
feel. I mean, it is thick thick in the
41:14
room and it lingers they call that Afterglow.
41:18
Well, the Afterglow can be a few moments a few hours.
41:22
It could be a few days and I believe when you are combining
41:27
those three that Afterglow it goes and goes and goes and I'd
41:34
say it's so good. It makes you Hunger for More and
41:38
that's okay because you're hungry to be one with your
41:42
spouse, right? That's a great thing.
41:45
So that bond that you have then just it just a you up.
41:51
It's kind of like Like my daughter on caffeine which when
41:56
it's finals week, she's a sophomore in college.
41:59
And when it's finals, week girlfriend has like three
42:02
monsters and two cups of coffee a day.
42:04
That's insane. Don't do that.
42:08
But when you are aligning, those three, that's the kind of
42:15
impacted oomph that goes into the lovemaking session and into
42:20
the orgasm. So that is what I'm talking
42:24
about when I'm saying great sex. So, if that is the fruits, you
42:30
know, you want to make sure that your relationship your marriage
42:34
is thriving because it just it's a cycle.
42:38
It just like you have it, you do it on accident or something or
42:44
you like really focus and do it that one time and it's so good.
42:47
You're like, oh my gosh, we got to do that again.
42:50
And I hope you guys know that you should be having these types
42:52
of conversations. Yeah, you know at home you
42:55
should be having these conversations with your Styles,
42:59
like hey, do you think you know, let's tonight let's focus on
43:02
this. Let's pray that we get all three
43:05
of these in line. Yes, I did say pray about having
43:07
sex. Yes, yes I did.
43:22
So if it's not something that's good for you, you could pray
43:25
about it. If it's something that you want
43:27
better, you could pray about it. I have an entire confession that
43:32
I created back in year one because, you know, in the
43:35
disconnect, you don't want to have any sex with the fatigue
43:40
and our schedules. I didn't, I didn't want to have
43:42
sex, but guess what? It's my husband's number one
43:45
need. So hello.
43:48
You got to fulfill that me buddy, right?
43:51
Is that I made a confession, I tell you what and it.
43:57
Like I said, when you get into the presence of God, your
44:01
mindset changes, so it went from, I'm too tired to do it to.
44:05
I can't wait to do it right. It went from you know I'm too
44:10
mad to do it so you were about to do it you know.
44:15
So that is 0, that's 0 great sex, number one, ingredients to
44:22
great sex. Christ.
44:27
Christ is always going to be the number one ingredient.
44:29
And as something as precious and special and important and
44:34
sacred, as sex has to be taken to him, especially when you have
44:38
problems. Because guess what?
44:40
Janice and I have been married for what we call a long time.
44:44
It's a long time for us. Yes.
44:46
So in that long period of time and through changes in our
44:50
physical body because we do live in a physical body.
44:54
Sometimes your body doesn't work, right?
44:56
And when the body doesn't work, right?
44:58
It messes with your great sex alignment and you got to figure
45:02
that stuff out. So that means you got to have
45:05
conversations, you might have have a doctor, you might have to
45:08
have some other things to help you with that.
45:11
So you need to be praying about your sex life.
45:19
I mean, you have to ask to have the compassion still confessed,
45:23
you know, almost daily. I thank you, Lord.
45:25
That every time, Chris and I are intimate with one another.
45:29
It is astounding. It is tantalizing, it is
45:32
exceptional for both of us and I am he never lets me down.
45:41
Yes, ma'am. I'm a Sensei.
45:43
You know, we have to, we have to speak in tongues because the
45:46
English language alien language on Earth.
45:48
Don't it? Don't get it.
45:50
You could. You got to?
45:52
I don't know how you are not praying and have to say, I like
45:58
loafers. Let's get some more.
46:00
It is, can I get an extra hour in the day so I could get some
46:03
more ingredient. You better pray.
46:11
Better. Trust God to meet you in that
46:13
bedroom, you better just because I tell you it's going to be some
46:17
things you come up against. Especially, ladies.
46:20
That's ladies. Oh my goodness, at a certain
46:22
point in your life, after 40, it just things change down there
46:26
and you gonna need Jesus, he gonna need Jesus.
46:29
Number two communication. This is really for the men women
46:34
too, but really men guys, if you are, intimate non-sexually.
46:41
Your wife all day, do you know that your chances of getting
46:45
lucky that night are going to increase exponentially the way
46:50
you communicate with your wife, verbally, non-verbally really
46:57
tending toward her. Her top needs, and her love
47:02
language, and and making sure you effectively communicate, and
47:07
I have a whole seminar on effective communication,
47:11
Medication. So, make sure you follow me to
47:13
get that, but you need Communication in order to make
47:18
your marriage and any relationship smooth sailing
47:22
success number three connection. So this connection I'm talking
47:29
about is Gandhi but non-sexual a joining a, you know, if a shared
47:38
interest, you know, you two are sharing your lives together.
47:41
There that is bringing intimacy and closeness and Trust so it's
47:46
that that connection is you building your trust and that
47:49
just comes with time with you keeping your promise, you being
47:53
a person of integrity and they can trust you and that trust
47:59
makes me want to do anything for my husband and vice versa.
48:03
So that connection also shows up in the bedroom and number four,
48:11
Or compromise. Now, as a husband and wife, you
48:16
are on the same team for all the sports listeners.
48:21
You have your favorite team, right?
48:23
And you're watching a game, I like football.
48:27
So let's talk about that XFL since they're still playing
48:30
right now. So you're watching the XFL game
48:35
and if you like me, you're talking about the uniforms, they
48:40
could be better. The Rock, they can be better.
48:42
I hope you listen to this podcast, right?
48:45
Those uniforms be little bit better.
48:47
Anyway, how would you feel if your team was on the sidelines?
48:53
Having a physical fistfight on the side during the game?
48:59
They have called a timeout to give your time to get over your
49:03
mess, mmm. Before it interferes with the
49:08
game, the coach is now got to get between Scene, two of his
49:12
own players. Me it.
49:14
If you like me, you are mad. You like, this is so stupid.
49:18
Why are you dudes save that for the field, right?
49:21
Well, that is what a husband and a wife look, like when they're
49:26
arguing over something, it looks the thing.
49:29
Yes, I want you to remember, you know, watching two players on
49:34
the team argue because that's what you look like, you're all
49:37
on the same team. You need to take that.
49:41
Passion to the bedroom. He to take that anger and in
49:47
fight the enemy, the spirit that is a trying to drive you to a
49:52
part that's where you use that energy for you.
49:55
Don't use that on one another but you use that to expel and to
50:02
rid and eradicate those evil spirits, that tried to attack
50:06
you and your spouse. Mmm.
50:09
So when you get into To a heated discussion.
50:12
And notice I said when because you will because we are
50:18
imperfect people with different thought processes and different
50:22
ideas and thoughts. And so, we will not always
50:25
agree, right? We we're not going to always
50:30
agree. We're not all going to be, you
50:34
know, happy about everything and you have to compromise.
50:38
Mmm compromise means. Yielding to one another for the
50:43
purpose of unity but you got to do it you know it goes right
50:48
along with submission giving into the power of another
50:53
agreement between parties. That's what you have to do in
50:58
order to continue to go forward in your relationship Janice and
51:02
I haven't got this far without compromising.
51:05
Exactly. Yeah.
51:07
We have made compromises. We have met our husbands.
51:11
In the middle so that we can get right there.
51:14
Get behind each other and go forward.
51:16
And that's why we're at the points that we are at.
51:20
Yes. So what are the ingredients?
51:23
The great sex and a successful marriage, Christ, communication,
51:29
effective, communication, connection and compromise.
51:34
So I know that was a lot, but that's okay, because you can
51:37
listen to the podcast over and write this down.
51:41
Yes, yes, yes. But I have enjoyed sharing that
51:47
with you all and I'll tell you what, I hope, my story can be an
51:51
inspiration to all you listeners and know that if you are feeling
51:56
disconnected right now, it's not the end of the world.
51:59
You do not have to have to go to divorce court.
52:02
Actually change your mind, change your thought process, and
52:06
look at it like here's an opportunity for us to become
52:09
closer because Cuz I can attest to this.
52:13
When you come out of a battle, you're closer together.
52:17
Would you say that Janice? Yes, yes.
52:20
Yeah, absolutely closer. You're closer, you trust each
52:24
other more and it's great. So, just look at it, like, hey,
52:27
here's an opportunity for us to become closer.
52:30
So, put in the work. Yeah, you know what the work is?
52:34
Go to Jesus? Yes, Jesus, be your best self
52:39
use tools and strategies. Geez, Tanisha where I get tools
52:42
and strategies for. Oh, I'm glad you asked.
52:46
I have found it as she said, a group on Facebook or better that
52:52
is called strong marriage and there, I give you the tools and
52:56
strategies that you need that will help you eliminate or get
53:02
out of arguments to help you understand what compromise is
53:07
how to apologize. All that good stuff tools and
53:11
tricks for you to continuously build and maintain a great.
53:16
Godly, healthy relationship. Wow, wow.
53:22
Wow, that was super awesome. Denise.
53:27
Oh my goodness, you left, you left us with so many.
53:33
Let me ask you this question and I know being a coach and
53:36
marriage. I know you get all kind of
53:38
emails. I know you get all kind of
53:40
questions and approach and I mean people can get really deep
53:44
and really As I had, I had two young ladies.
53:49
They got me on. On the phone together and asking
53:58
me these questions. What do you think about this is
54:00
what it, what are you doing? Wait, wait wait, hold it, hold
54:02
it, hold it, hold it. Wait a minute.
54:06
So people are in different stages and different phases are,
54:10
like, what would you say to the? What would you say to the young
54:15
lady? What would you say to the lady
54:17
that She feel that she isn't she and her husband, they are
54:24
closed. And she does feel that
54:29
disconnect and when it comes to sex and that reason being might
54:35
be something physical with him, he's my mat not be able to
54:39
perform like she want him but they communicated his or she as
54:45
a woman just don't have those desires.
54:49
They're not as strong as they were what you say that these
54:53
tools and strategies of wood. Be the answer to bringing back.
55:02
Bring that sex back alive because, you know, just like you
55:06
start off saying you were specifically said marriage in
55:12
marriage sex in marriage because there are so many single people
55:19
that are having sex and making it seems and and and not making
55:25
it seem that might be exactly. What it is.
55:28
They're getting what some people in marriage needs to get.
55:33
They need that connection. They need their one.
55:35
But, you know, there when you having sex, they are soul ties.
55:41
And you go from one man to the other man and this, man.
55:44
And that, man, you have to think about those fears and those ties
55:48
that you're encountering, but being married.
55:54
So marry me. Oh yeah.
55:56
That She single yet. She said she had great say
56:01
though. She did this.
56:02
She did. So then you start feeling like
56:04
what what's missing? What I'm not excited is, I'm not
56:08
looking forward to this. What would you say to give the
56:11
answer to the woman? Who feel that?
56:14
Their, their sex life is lacking, or she doesn't have the
56:19
desire or she's not being satisfied or and I know
56:25
communication. That's number one talking about
56:28
it with each other and find it and find a solution.
56:32
But there are mayor of people that do not add.
56:37
I didn't know this too. I probably learned this.
56:41
Maybe five years ago, that's a matter of people that do not
56:44
have sex. Yes, it's crazy.
56:47
I don't have talked to several people.
56:50
This one lady told me about to my face.
56:53
I still can't believe it to this day.
56:56
She said, I don't care what he does.
56:57
As long as he paid the mortgage and I was like, girl how much is
57:02
your mortgage that to like you let I don't mind it.
57:07
If Susie down the street does him.
57:10
What I am still to this day? I cannot believe she said that
57:15
because you said, you look at I mean crazy.
57:17
And I'm going to fix you. So she I was like, what?
57:21
You don't want Susie topping off your man.
57:23
No no, no, honey at that. I think that's when I wrote the
57:26
sex there because I was like, she needs some help.
57:28
Her mind needs to change because your body doesn't belong to you,
57:34
anymore, belongs to your spouse, your body belongs to Jesus.
57:38
And then he important instructed us to give our bodies to our
57:41
spouse who need to get married. So you can't, you can't parse it
57:46
out. Shout to Susie down.
57:47
The street is that she didn't feel like doing it.
57:50
That's like, no, I saw I tell ladies when you do not have the
57:55
desire because age comes into a plate.
57:58
What we eat comes into a play, how the the condition of our
58:03
body comes into play. But that's what I said, you have
58:08
to make a confession. You have to speak what you want
58:10
and you're one. I didn't want to have sex
58:12
either. I was tired.
58:14
I was mad and I just, I didn't feel in the mood but guess what.
58:20
Man's number one need is sex. If there's nothing wrong with
58:25
him and he can get it up, he's going to want to get it up and
58:28
if he married you, you are the one he wants to get it up with.
58:32
So that means you have to do it, right?
58:34
And instead of thinking, I gotta do it, change your mindset.
58:40
I get to enjoy an intimate moment with my husband is body,
58:46
but Belongs to me. So you have to be begin to
58:48
confess that every day. It took me some time but you
58:52
know I am no longer. What?
58:54
I heard a pastor say men are instant and women are like
59:00
microwaves. Well, I'm no longer a microwave.
59:03
When my husband comes in, I can look at my husband.
59:06
I'm ready. Hmm I can see him coming.
59:09
I'm ready. I can have a thought about him
59:11
during the day. I'm ready.
59:13
Because that confession. I mean, I wrote down
59:16
Specifically what I wanted because when my husband came
59:19
home, he was ready. So my, when my husband wants to
59:23
the door, I want to be ready. I want to be in the mood now.
59:27
Yes, he's supposed to do some things that helped get me there
59:31
too, but as his wife, it is my privilege.
59:37
My responsibility. My duty to not defraud him.
59:41
Right. To not have him.
59:44
You know, that becomes painful for them.
59:46
When they don't, you know, get that out right.
59:49
They have to get that out right. You know.
59:52
It becomes painful and I don't know about you ladies but if I
59:55
don't get my Nat I'm like I'm irritable
1:00:16
If some comes up, have a conversation, but we both ready.
1:00:20
You can be there for the for you men.
1:00:23
I know it's difficult for you to say, well babe, you know, I
1:00:29
can't hold my erection that long anymore.
1:00:31
I know those conversations are difficult but that is your
1:00:36
number one cheerleader. That is your, you know, Earthly
1:00:40
rock. That is the person that is
1:00:42
supposed to come and support you, right?
1:00:46
So go ahead and be vulnerable with your wife and that
1:00:50
conversation alone will bring about an increase in your
1:00:53
intimacy, which would be in, would make her want to because
1:00:58
she, you know, wants to accommodate you.
1:00:59
Her body wants to accommodate you hurry, she hurt emotional.
1:01:03
Her soul wants to accommodate you.
1:01:05
She wants to take care of her man, so that conversation alone
1:01:09
can help you men to get more of what you want.
1:01:14
You also, you know, you need to go The doctor and figure out.
1:01:18
Hey, what's going on? Maybe it's medication you wrong.
1:01:21
Well, let whoop is the medication causing erectile
1:01:23
dysfunction. Then can we look at alternative
1:01:28
medicines that will help, you know, get the result that I need
1:01:32
physically for my body, but also not hinder me from enjoying my
1:01:36
wife, right? So those are things that you
1:01:40
would have to do. But, like Janice said, it's
1:01:43
communication. You've got to have these
1:01:44
conversations. Yeah.
1:01:46
Yes no, they are not fun. No, they don't feel good at the
1:01:51
moment. But I tell you, if you press
1:01:53
through and get to the end of the conversation, the result
1:01:58
will be rewarding. Yeah, just got to go through.
1:02:02
And like I said, when you have Christ, Christ is all about
1:02:06
going through, you had victory in him.
1:02:09
We are already Victorious. We've already won.
1:02:12
You just have to go through the in it.
1:02:15
Yes. Yeah, so yeah, that's what I
1:02:18
would tell them. Do not ever, you know, think
1:02:21
that you can't revive your sex life.
1:02:25
Yes, you can. And it won't take as long as you
1:02:28
think either. Mmm.
1:02:29
Yes, yes, yes. And there are some there are
1:02:34
some women their desire sex but they husband don't because they
1:02:41
probably feel Inadequate. You know, well I'm not satisfied
1:02:48
with her satisfying her. I will say, which is what I was
1:02:53
telling the young lady the other day.
1:02:56
Sometimes you keep pushing the man all for so long.
1:03:03
After a while he just don't show any answers then you wake up.
1:03:06
You you you didn't you wake up oh you want to hear?
1:03:10
You touch me all your honesty. Anjali don't you don't push them
1:03:14
off so long and to turn them all so long or he wasn't satisfying.
1:03:20
You didn't communicate that with him or and every time he wanted
1:03:26
to he felt in his mind all under this pressure.
1:03:31
Oh am I gonna be able to fly Am I gonna be able to send this
1:03:33
crap? So of course.
1:03:35
He on that President, he don't. And then you have, you know, you
1:03:39
got an attitude. It's something that needs to be
1:03:41
it's something that needs to be communicated because that's
1:03:43
there's a lot of women that dude has a six and their husband
1:03:48
tolling do not. And I feel that because because
1:03:57
there might be an issue health-wise, Not being able to
1:04:01
fulfill one I think is unfair to a man.
1:04:05
I mean, unfair to a woman for man to neglect his wife because
1:04:10
there's other things you could do to sector to satisfy your
1:04:14
wife. So that just click because you
1:04:16
feel like you can't then you just is.
1:04:19
That's the that's it. I don't even read.
1:04:22
I didn't answer me. We don't, I don't even touch
1:04:24
her. I don't, they ask Pride.
1:04:27
That is pride. That's all right.
1:04:31
And that is so unfair, that is so unfair.
1:04:34
That's so unfair to women. So it's very important but I
1:04:37
think women need to to voice their talk about their hey look
1:04:44
wait a minute, I have needs. You can be fun that could be the
1:04:49
beginning of your great sex with this conversations.
1:04:53
I mean, if you're doing the process you can say hey let's
1:05:02
try this. Do it this way, you know, and it
1:05:05
won't be it won't make him feel like I'm not getting anything
1:05:09
done because now you are giving some sweet instructions that
1:05:14
will help and it would not They make you feel good, but he's
1:05:17
also going to feel good because now he knows how to satisfy you
1:05:21
is. And trying new things.
1:05:25
Is an exciting time. I mean, I mean, you can go into
1:05:28
the bedroom like, like, when he comes home from work, you know,
1:05:33
have everything done have candlelight dinner, and because
1:05:36
when he's like, West, dinner, me, take him to the bedroom,
1:05:42
light your candles and say, we're going to do something
1:05:44
different tonight. We're going to do I want to try
1:05:46
this, I want to do, I mean do this morning to wake up?
1:05:51
Yeah, you know, you can have conversations in a way where
1:05:55
it's not like you're sitting face-to-face and you're saying,
1:05:57
okay, I don't like this and you didn't do that, don't do it like
1:06:01
that, right? You know, you can do it.
1:06:03
Like, okay babe, let's try this for Less, let's write down on a
1:06:07
piece of paper are fantasy. What would you like me to do to
1:06:11
you? And I'm going to write down what
1:06:13
I want you to do to me. Oh my gosh.
1:06:15
How high. Is that how sweet and intimate
1:06:18
is that something they are you to only will share?
1:06:21
That's going to seriously bind you and I guarantee you that the
1:06:27
it's going to be a wonderful experience.
1:06:31
Even if it doesn't come out, right?
1:06:32
Maybe you wanted to try a particular position and you
1:06:37
don't get it right? It is not the end of the world.
1:06:40
Is you two doing this together and I have been there and it's
1:06:44
okay to laugh. It is fun baby.
1:06:48
I get that position right? My leg can't do that no more,
1:06:51
you know? Do and say and guess what, it's
1:06:57
a special thing between you two the to.
1:07:00
And so it's going to be special is going to be fine.
1:07:03
And once you get out of your head, And stop thinking about
1:07:08
that. Then you'll be able to enjoy it.
1:07:11
Yes, that just you know what it just recently happened to me
1:07:15
that's well and you're like what?
1:07:18
The sex there lady had a problem with with, with that.
1:07:22
You know, I yes you get attacked, you get a tax so
1:07:25
because I'm helping other people with their sex life.
1:07:29
I got an attack thoughts in my head.
1:07:31
Will you not satisfied him? He is the king over there and
1:07:34
you getting an F on your report card.
1:07:37
It's pitiful girl. You get an F is man getting the
1:07:39
F every time and I was and I would feel it.
1:07:42
I would sit there and think about it like yeah, I'm giving
1:07:44
him an F. 0 is horrible and it wasn't until one night.
1:07:49
I said, babe, for some reason I feel like, you know, and if I
1:07:54
was, if we were getting report cards, I get an F, he said, what
1:07:57
are you talking about? No, you would not, okay A Plus.
1:08:01
And I was like, okay, And guess what?
1:08:13
That just took it to another level.
1:08:16
So you're going to have these hiccups.
1:08:18
You're going to have these things that happen.
1:08:20
But if you stick together and have these conversations, I was
1:08:24
so scared to tell him that. I was so scared.
1:08:27
He was going to say you are getting an F.
1:08:29
So what if he said you get Maddie, okay, so now What do I
1:08:38
do? Show me what to do what to do
1:08:41
today and then we would have went home and said okay we're
1:08:44
gonna try it is be going to do that be gone but that's the
1:08:47
adventure together. That's the intimacy to trust one
1:08:51
another to say. Okay so no you're not getting an
1:08:55
F, you ready? But I think if we do this is the
1:08:59
8th, bring it up. Yeah.
1:09:00
Right so and and when you just go through because whenever you
1:09:06
are Ready. The Victor.
1:09:09
Just go through and then see your Victory.
1:09:12
Yes, yes. Yes.
1:09:14
And as sex is healthy, it is. Yes, it is healthy.
1:09:19
It is healthy. It reduces stress.
1:09:23
Yes, it helps blood pressure. I read you probably have read
1:09:31
this better this or something. I forgot what the statistics it
1:09:35
is but and me. Me, I'm going to pull it up in
1:09:39
men. Having soul mates having so many
1:09:46
orgasms helps help with prostate cancer.
1:09:51
Yes, me and have men have less prostate, many men that have
1:09:57
more sex have less prostate cancer.
1:10:01
They said, yeah, is it is proven that?
1:10:05
It it does is healthy 21 times a month.
1:10:09
So in one men, men who orgasm at least 21 times, Times a month
1:10:14
are less likely to get prostrate cancer prostate cancer.
1:10:19
I cannot talk. I get so excited.
1:10:20
I'm like I can't get out but yes.
1:10:22
So I mean isn't it a blessing? That me as a wife I can help my
1:10:27
husband reduce his chances of hairs.
1:10:30
Yeah, I mean that's Top Dog, you know, God didn't forget
1:10:35
anything, not only did he make it feel really, really good, but
1:10:41
it's good for every part of you. Your physical body.
1:10:45
Like you said, it relieves anxiety and stress.
1:10:49
It's good for your blood pressure.
1:10:51
It's a muscle building, so it's good for your heart, it even
1:10:56
helps improve your mental health.
1:10:58
So, now science has proven that, you know, those three parts, you
1:11:03
know, your soul, that's your mental health.
1:11:06
That's your mind, your will, and your emotions sex takes care of,
1:11:10
all of that. And then with the spiritual you
1:11:13
add the spiritual and Intuit. Hey that's that's great too.
1:11:17
Yes, oh yes, husband's a wife. You should be having sex.
1:11:21
Yeah. And if you think, oh, well, I
1:11:24
have this situation going on and we can't y'all email me.
1:11:29
I bet you, I can help you see what you can do in your
1:11:33
particular situation, and order to make sure you and your
1:11:37
spouse, your own spouse. Having the best sex of your
1:11:40
lives. Yes, yes.
1:11:42
Awesome to nice also. This has been so great.
1:11:47
Will you tell our audience? How can they reach you follow?
1:11:53
You get in touch with you because this is so needed.
1:11:56
Like you say, you do not hear messages like this coming from
1:12:00
the pulpit. You know, growing up as girls
1:12:05
I'll be heard was don't have sex, don't do it, don't do it,
1:12:10
don't do it. All them boys.
1:12:12
Want is to have Have sex with you and you have this guard up
1:12:17
all the time. So, being you get married feel
1:12:19
like that's all your husband want and you have a whole
1:12:23
perspective, but when you learn, when you learn the real true
1:12:27
meaning God can of 6 in marriage, you can have a
1:12:33
thriving sake life you can have a thriving, six life, you can.
1:12:37
Yeah, yes, yeah. You know how I was Abraham and
1:12:43
Gosh, he's the same. You know what I'm saying?
1:12:45
This is bad. This man can regulate a woman
1:12:50
and yes, 99 19 years old, so wow.
1:13:01
Well I am of course you can reach me on my website, Tanisha
1:13:06
Collins.com Tean, ishaa Collins.com, you can reach me
1:13:12
via email, mrs. Mrs. Tanisha Collins at
1:13:16
gmail.com and I have a face book author page which is
1:13:22
facebook.com slash author, Tanisha Collins, and look up
1:13:29
strong marriage. Age on Facebook and join.
1:13:32
My exclusive support group there, I'm everywhere.
1:13:36
I'm on Pinterest, I'm on Instagram.
1:13:41
I'm on LinkedIn and but get connected with me via email or
1:13:48
on my website to Misha Collins.com, wow, wow Tanisha
1:13:53
thank you so much. Thank you for your time.
1:13:55
Thank you for this great content.
1:13:58
And I hope that That the listeners and these podcasts are
1:14:04
mainly for women. But I know for a fact men,
1:14:09
listen to these podcasts and that's good because you can
1:14:12
learn what women need and what women want.
1:14:14
So that's fine is right, but the marriage made the podcast, is
1:14:21
when women that are married and those that engage in those in
1:14:25
their seasonal, waiting that Desiring husband's but this
1:14:30
Episode has been awesome. It has been so awesome.
1:14:34
I hope that there's great takeaway and if you came in here
1:14:37
because I know when people saw say, I can't wait to see how
1:14:40
many numbers that get on this, when they go like big, you know,
1:14:46
you know, people want people to know.
1:14:48
People want to know, people want to know how to have great sex
1:14:52
and had a great how to help 36 and I think you for being
1:14:57
vulnerable enough and I don't know to step out there and talk
1:15:03
about it and just lay it out there that is that to me is so
1:15:07
so awesome and so so needed because that that is what's
1:15:12
lacking in a lot of marriages. Yes, they don't, they're not
1:15:17
coming together like they should and there is that disconnect.
1:15:22
So again, Tanish, I thank you, I thank you for your time.
1:15:26
I thank you all listeners tuned in.
1:15:29
You can tune. An apple podcast or Spotify,
1:15:32
download the app. So you can see this great woman
1:15:36
who tells her story and has a great testimony and it very
1:15:43
encouraged and inspired word as to, how God can bless your sex
1:15:48
life in married, and then age then have nothing to do with a
1:15:52
lot of times, we the listen to people talk so long, we start
1:15:56
believing it. All you get a certain age.
1:15:59
You're not gonna disaster. Oh, you can older know.
1:16:02
You might not be hanging from the chandelier in your city, or
1:16:06
you can be, you can be, you can be all you can be hanging from
1:16:11
the chandelier it. So don't let those thoughts of
1:16:15
negative thoughts. What people say, right?
1:16:19
Deter you from having a great sex life and again, thank you
1:16:24
Tanisha and we're going to end this podcast, but you can stay
1:16:27
off to this. Thank you so much for joining us
1:16:30
for this episode of the women majoring in marriage podcast.
1:16:34
If you're enjoying the show, please feel free to like
1:16:37
subscribe, leave a review or comment, you know, all that good
1:16:40
stuff that helps other folks. Like you find the podcast,
1:16:43
please come back every month on the second and fourth Wednesday
1:16:46
for new episodes. You can also find Janice on our
1:16:49
website. Www.jfn.co.jp/toho can order her
1:16:54
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1:16:58
sure to Check out our Facebook group at women, majoring in
1:17:01
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1:17:04
or would like to reach out, feel free to send us an email at the
1:17:07
marriage, major at gmail.com. Thanks again for tuning in and
1:17:12
we'll catch you in the next episode.