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Should I go to therapy? · Brilliant Minds?

• Andrea: Why is that countdown so long? Welcome to Brilliant Minds Wellness. I need to start over. Welcome to Brilliant Minds question mark. I literally had to ask that as a question. Wow. ⁓ today's been a roller coaster. I'm Andrea and this is my lovely co-host, best friend, business partner. we're starting off on some bumpy rocks here, but it's okay because we are gonna talk about something that maybe I need to take some notes on today, which is reasons to go to therapy. Olivia: Olivia. Andrea: ⁓ and I feel like this one has so many ways we could go. So I'm really curious to hear like what you thought of when we talked about this topic earlier. Olivia: Okay, first thing I was gonna say is we haven't recorded in a while and it's like nice to be back. Nobody on the other side knows that, but it's been like three weeks since we recorded. It's been a while. Andrea: Yeah. Thank you. I agree. ⁓ my gosh, yes. You're right. Olivia: Yeah. So it's been a while. So it's good to be back. I I just wanna like put that out there. It's good to be back. Good to be Grovin. Andrea: It's it's good it's good to be back and to like spend time with you where we're not talking about work. 'Cause we haven't done that in a hot minute. Olivia: Yeah, I know, yeah, that was true. We just talked the other day, we're like, we haven't really seen each other. What's happening? Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. And here we are. We're back at it. Bat we' back with our shenanigans. Olivia: Yeah. We're absolutely crushing it. so okay, yeah, I agree. My mind went in a lot of directions when it came to like why would somebody go to therapy? And I think one of the words that came to my mind was or maybe ideas is like when you're feeling stuck. Andrea: Ha ha. Ooh, yeah. Yeah, I like that. Olivia: Yeah. because you can feel stuck about a lot of different things, right? And and you can go to therapy for any one of those things. A as we know. But like more commonly we should talk about is that you can go to therapy for any reason. So if you're feeling stuck on something, therapy would be great for that because that's kind of one of my like next reasons you should go to therapy, which is it's helpful to have somebody else's perspective. Andrea: Mm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Olivia: Until like get a different take. Andrea: I definitely feel like you and I are gonna have a lot of the same answers on this today and like same things, right? ⁓ but definitely the first thing that came up for me was what you said, which is like kind of anything. I I am of the personal belief that like therapy doesn't always have to have a catalyst, right? Like you don't have to necessarily have a reason. ⁓ which kind of is bouncing off of your second one, which was just to have somebody to talk to. Olivia: Well, yeah. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I think the reason why I so quickly went to the when you're feeling stuck is because you and I both know most people come to therapy because of a because of a reason, because of a catalyst. Obviously you can go to therapy at any time and and you should at any time for anything. And like almost categorically that doesn't happen. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Olivia: It's when people are like, things have hit the fan and I don't know what to do about it, or I've like, I'm at my wits end about this thing and I need it to get better or I need relief. Usually it's more like relief focused, but yeah. Yeah. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. I would I would agree with that. I think I think there's a lot of different camps of like why people do end up in therapy. You know, people maybe have been in therapy their whole lives and they just really like it. And so it's like, you know, I've heard the comparison that therapy is like changing the oil on your car where you kind of have to do it in order to kind of keep your car running and staying adjust like well adjusted. And I don't know how much I totally agree with that because I think it's a weird comparison. ⁓ Olivia: Mm. Yeah. I mean, yeah, we we could t we could totally rabbit trail on that, but I I'll I'll keep my thoughts together. Andrea: I know. I know, but I do like the concept of like there like in a way it's like going to the doctor for a checkup, which we should be doing, people out there. ⁓ we should be going to the doctor for checkups pretty regularly, regardless if you don't have something that's going on. We should still go yearly. And and therapy in a way can be like that. It's probably a little more frequently than yearly, but it can definitely be this like. Tune up on yourself for little bits at a time. And some people do it monthly for the rest of their lives, and some people do it in little chunks. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah. Take spin on that, one of the things that I think I've gotten out of therapy 'cause I was b I was about to say like what my clients have gotten out of therapy. That's a that's a little narcissistic. Okay. So let me pull that back. something that I have definitely gotten from therapy is being able to better understand myself and to learn more about myself. Which ultimately I think is like a really positive and supportive thing. but it's like really lovely because that information is then like always going to be there. I'm always going to know myself better indefinitely because of that experience and that process. and like I don't I don't know if I could say I would get that in the same way doing something else. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Olivia: And so in that in that sense it's s like becomes even more valuable. Andrea: Totally. It's such a unique look at being stuck, right? Or like this idea of like I'm something has happened and and I need to do this, where and I also think that there's different perceptions in the world of what people think therapy is. Right. And I think we're touching on some of that, right? Where it's like therapy isn't just antibiotics. It is it can be, right? It can be working out a mental or emotional infection. Olivia: Hm. Andrea: But it also can be like, I just want to know more about myself and have somebody support me on that path because sometimes it can be hard to do that by ourselves. Olivia: I would argue oftentimes it's kind of impossible to do that by yourself. I mean, like we were built for connection. We can't we can't I th ⁓ no, this gets into like worldview and perspective, but like in in my perspective, I don't think people can make meaningful change within isolation. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ha ha ha. ⁓ I totally agree with that. Yeah. Yeah. Olivia: And so like connection, relationship, support, a network, all of those things becomes incredibly important and also like integral to actually being able to make change. So it's like y you can only understand yourself so well until you need to rely on connections and relationships to actually like learn about yourself more. Yeah. Andrea: Yeah. ⁓ totally. I think we talked about this in the AI episode where it was like we are relational social beings, right? We are people that thrive off of that interaction with other people. And having a therapist is a way that we can connect with someone that has a a di like a I don't know what the how to describe it, but there's just a different perspective. on helping us get there than our friends or our family or our parents. It's it's very much like that's what we do is we help these people explore themselves in a really unique relationship. Olivia: Yeah. And like a no strings attached kind of relationship. Which is I think generally really lovely. And I don't mean in like the sexual way, no strings attached. I mean like like there's there's no like there's no transact Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Olivia: transaction happening or like something owed from the client to the therapist in a way. Like I get I get the payment piece. Like I'm not trying to say there's no transaction. I'm saying like I don't owe my therapist like anything y Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's like no strings attached. Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. Right. I don't need to go to their wedding. I'm not gonna like hang out with them or buy them a drink. Like, no. Yeah. Which does kind of like, as I was thinking about this, obviously like you could go to therapy for any reason. We know this, right? But I also like one of the things that I was thinking of was if you feel like nobody in your world or your circle is listening to you. And I think that was something that like I had in my like in one of my therapy journeys, like going to find therapy, a therapist. Olivia: Hm. Andrea: Was that I didn't feel like I had people in my like circle at the time that were truly listening to me or like legit asking me how I was doing. And and then like I've been I've been listening to a lot of Reddit stories lately, like people reading Reddit stories. And half the time I'm like, go to therapy. Because all these people are like, ⁓ you're going to Reddit to tell everybody like that you seeking validation or to ask for support. And it's like, Olivia: Mm. Andrea: That's a reason to go to therapy if you're going to Reddit. Olivia: Yeah but then at the same time I I like I I agree and then a part of me is like but th therapists aren't obligated to validate you either. Andrea: Totally. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Olivia: Right. Right. So like and that's like more my professional hat that I'm like Right. But like yes, ultimately I I totally agree with him. Yeah. Yeah. Andrea: Yes. Yeah, yeah. Just the general sentiment that like if you're gonna go tell your problems on Reddit, you should probably see a therapist. Olivia: But Reddit is free. Andrea: I know, and there's a lot of Reddit therapists out there which make me laugh. Olivia: That's funny. You're right, we should do a whole bit on that. Hundred percent. Andrea: Right? Yeah. I like have found a couple of Reddit therapist stories that I think would be fun to read to you and like get a reaction from, or if we ask like people around us. So throwing that out there. Olivia: Yeah, okay, yeah, we should do that. one of the other things that I've noticed with clients that come in is maybe not just necessarily feeling stuck, but feeling like really confused of like w like why do I do this thing? Or like w what what is this experience and like how do I make sense of it? Or like what is going on or Andrea: Ha ha Mm-hmm. I love that one. Olivia: Like why is this hap you know, just kinda like the more of the existentially type questions of just like trying to make sense of their experience and being just at a complete loss to make like heads or tails of it. Andrea: Yeah, I like that one. I think confusion is a good one. I think ⁓ you know, to kind of bounce off of that one to like ⁓ the kind of the opposite of confusion, but more of like curiosity. And maybe that's kind of what we were talking about earlier, is like being really curious why things are happening in your life. Like if something is happening, you know, over and over or pattern. Yeah, like yeah, like curiosity is Olivia: Hmm. Like a pattern. Yeah, yeah. Andrea: To that, like think that kind of may maybe is kind of parallel to confusion, right? Where you're noticing things and you're like, Why is this happening? Yeah. Olivia: Yeah, yeah. There's that. ⁓ what would you say to someone who says, so many people have told me to go to therapy? Andrea: It's so funny you say that 'cause as we've been talking, I've been like, now what about the people that have been told to go to therapy? Olivia: Hmm. Andrea: What would I tell someone that said that? Olivia: Yeah, or I don't know, like maybe just like your general thoughts. But like if you ha or or even the scenario of like you had somebody come in and you're like, Hey, you know, what what makes you interested in starting therapy? And they're like, ⁓ I've had a lot of people tell me I need to go to therapy, like what would you say? Andrea: Mm-hmm. ⁓ man. ⁓ that's such an interesting one because there's so much context that could come out of that too, which is so interesting. It's like that could either be I'm doing this because somebody's telling me to do this, or it could be like, I'm actually really curious about this because a lot of people have suggested it. Right. And there's like, I feel like if you watched me, if you watched me say this on YouTube, you saw a physical shift in. Olivia: Yeah. ⁓ totally. Andrea: How I said that too, where it's like, I think it would depend a lot on how they reacted to me in that moment. And I think something I would ask when that got brought up is is there something that they've noticed, right? Or what else are these people telling you? Like, when does that come up? Right? When are these friends telling you that you should go to therapy? Like, cause there's gotta be. In my mind, it's there's gotta be some sort of link to something else. It's not just like somebody's randomly going up to you and being like, Hey, thanks for making those quesadillas. You should go to therapy. Olivia: I I don't know why I just immediately pictured a Taco Bell employee and then my first thought was like, Yeah, they should probably be in therapy. They've probably seen some things. Okay, so one of the reasons you should go to therapy is if you work at Taco Bell Andrea: We're gonna get hyper specific here and list all the Olivia: Yeah. Here are all the people that are in and here are all the people that are out. Yeah. What would I say? Andrea: Mm-hmm. Now what about what about you? Yeah. Olivia: I think I'd probably like be a little like tongue in cheek with it and like kind of jokey and be like, ⁓ that's interesting, but what do you think? Or like what do you want? Andrea: Mm. Mm mm Yeah ⁓ for sure Olivia: 'Cause like Andrea: I th I think Olivia: I mean they they could have someone in their life that just is like everyone needs to go to therapy and like therapy, therapy, therapy and it's just annoying, right? It could be like it that could be the person. So I and I don't know, but I don't really care. What I really care about is like, why are you here? 'Cause nobody made this appointment for you. Andrea: Exactly. Yes. Yes. Hundred percent. Yep. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I Exactly. You know, that's actually a really good that's that's a really good point. I think I'd probably again excuse me, depending on context would also be like, Okay, so they're telling you this, like Olivia: Yeah. Andrea: Do you agree? Like I actually do think I've said that before. Do you agree? Olivia: And Yeah, yeah. Andrea: And the answers you d like I feel like that throws people off a little bit. They're like, Wait, what? Olivia: I think I I've been tempted to say two. I mean only once and I was like, Mm, that joke probably is a little too far But I was close to asking like, ⁓ should I expect your friends too then? Andrea: What's happening? Mm-hmm. that would be so good. ⁓ my gosh, pin that. ⁓ I'm adding that to my vocabulary. Like that's so good. ⁓ feel like you would have to have instant rapport with someone though to like maybe say that far. Olivia: Which is why I didn't say that. Cause I was like, that joke would absolutely hit if you and I were a good fit. But if we were not, it would not go well at all. It'd be like literal critical strike. Okay. Cannot go back from that if that did not land well. Andrea: Yeah, yeah. No, no. And and I th I think we would be able to tell when that would land. I would hope so. Olivia: Yes. Andrea: I would love if somebody was like, actually Maybe. Olivia: Mm. Andrea: Many, many moons ago I have done therapy with friends. So Olivia: Yeah. Have you ever had it where somebody's come to therapy and I decided one of the reasons that they're starting is because they know someone that's been going to therapy and they can like see it's really helped them. Andrea: Yeah. Are we on the same brain wave right now? What's happening? Olivia: Am I stealing all your content? Wow. You're so unoriginal. God, I really have to carry this episode. Andrea: Yeah well yes like Yes, it like what's funny is like the the things that are crossing my mind for this are like just slightly different ⁓ than yours. So what I was gonna say was like a reason to go to therapy would be if someone close to you in your life is also going to therapy. Like like I'm thinking like if your wife is going to therapy, you should also probably go to therapy. Like if your if your husband's going to therapy, the wife's Olivia: Hmm, okay. ⁓ like just just like a just like a s blanket statement, not even like you see that the therapy is being helpful for them. Andrea: Well, I I mean, obviously like there's context to that. But like I think it could be a really helpful, not necessarily like rule of thumb or like blanket statement, but more in the sense of like, I would like to support my partner in that experience from kind of a parallel experience so that I can help understand what they're going through. Cause if somebody's going through and processing trauma or like seeing that therapy is helping them. It can be really helpful to like go through that on your own and be like, ⁓ I get this. I understand why therapy is working for you or I understand why therapy is really hard right now. Olivia: Yeah, I mean I I I I kinda see that and I kinda don't because like everyone's change process is so different. That's like for instance, if if like if my spouse was like doing like hardcore drama work in therapy and they're like having disre he's having dysregulation and all that, that's actually probably the worst time for me to also be in therapy and dysregulate. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Right. Olivia: Do you see what I'm saying? Andrea: Yes. Yes. And I think what I'm also talking about is like so that they can find ways of supporting. Like kind of like a full yeah, it's a very like relational way of thinking about therapy in my brain. ⁓ but I I mean it's it's just one of those things to like think about or explore. Like, yeah, everyone's change process is different, hundred percent. But I think sometimes it can be helpful. Olivia: Yeah, okay. Andrea: Like if you're if your partner is going through big trauma processing to also like go through your own so that you can be regulated to help them. Obviously depending on your sit like your situation. Yeah. Olivia: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that makes a little bit more sense. it ⁓ I think another reason to go to therapy is kind of like the same reason I give my daughter to try new things. Is you don't know if you don't like it if you don't try it. Andrea: Mm. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's a great perspective. Like Olivia: Like yeah, you're not gonna know if you don't like it, you're not gonna know if it doesn't work for you, you're not even gonna know what it's like at all if you don't try it. Andrea: Right. Totally. And if you don't try it a couple of times. Right? 'Cause like your first experience isn't gonna be perfect. Maybe maybe it is. If you see us, it's gonna be perfect, so Olivia: Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna ask why your friends aren't in therapy too. Andrea: See? Perfect. We are perfection. Olivia: Yeah, obviously. Flawless. Andrea: Obviously. No, I like I like that a lot. Like you won't know if you like it until you give it the good old try. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah. Which is kinda funny because I mean, not like I'm relying on some poll for this ⁓ comment I'm about to make, but I I feel like a vast majority of people have an idea and judgment of what therapy is. And if it works, if they like it, if they're gonna go, all that. They like kind of already know they've already made up their minds. That's a better way of saying it. They've already made up their minds about therapy. But Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Olivia: There's a vast majority of people that haven't been to therapy. So the idea that they already have a preconceived notion of what it is and what it isn't, when they haven't even tried, that's where I'm like, okay, you're not gonna know unless you try. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. And and what's trying gonna hurt? Absolutely nothing. Olivia: Right. Like there's there's no there's no like downside, you know? Andrea: There's no harm. No. Yeah. Like it's it can be whatever you want it to be in a way. And if you try it, you might surprise yourself. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah. even like in a kind of switching gears a little bit, and a like broader context. As I've had this, I don't feel like it's as maybe not as common, I don't know. But just the idea of like you can go to therapy for one thing or you can go to therapy for everything. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. That was on my list. Yeah. I think like I think we I think we mentioned this at the beginning where it's like there's this preconceived notion that therapy you go for like having experienced some like big trauma. This like one big thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But at this point in our conversation, right, we've mentioned lots of things. We've mentioned very like broad things. And so it can be Olivia: Or like thing, yeah, or s or s yeah, something. Whatever it is, yeah. Andrea: And who knows, you might go into therapy for like one big big T trauma and come out being like, ⁓ I talked about A, B, C, D, E, all the way to Z like Olivia: Yeah. Andrea: Which happens which happens a lot. Olivia: ⁓ abs absolutely. Which is why I was bringing it up of like, ⁓ I used to have a lot of people that will come in for like one specific thing. But I wouldn't I don't even know if I would say that's true. Like I think people still come in over like a thing, but then it always becomes about everything. Because, you know, you're one whole person and that would be weird to like box every experience up into s something separate. Andrea: Mm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I remember studying solution focused therapy and it was very like solution focused brief focus therapy, which is like somebody does come in for a thing and then they like do four sessions and leave. And that really confused me. And I like I was like, but but how? Like what I'm hearing from these like fake clients or whatever or all these like other things, like We could totally dive into their attachment issues because they came in because they were angry at their aunt. Like Bruh. Olivia: Yeah. That's so funny. I mean I like solution focused. Andrea: Yes, I actually do too. Olivia: Ha ha ha. You don't say. I think I like solution focused, like if I had to get really analytical about it. I like solution focused for more the beginning stages of working with a client, but not for the long term. Andrea: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I have the same perspective on that. I think it's a great foundational piece. And when you're just starting, it's a really great way to like kind of get people's like foot in the door and understanding the space a little bit and kind of gearing them more towards, you know, what it looks like to process and kind of helps you get to those deeper things, I think. Olivia: Absolutely, yeah. I mean, again, w when we're talking about people that are coming to therapy, they're usually coming because it's like a catalyst, they're feeling stuck, like they're like really wanting things to change. They're not necessarily gonna want to like dig in deeper before things get better. They kinda want things to go better f at least a little bit better first. And then it will be easier to dive into things. So yeah. Absolutely. Like solution focus makes sense. It's almost like Andrea: Right. Mm-hmm. Mm. Yeah. Olivia: We have a lot of similarities. Andrea: Who knew? Olivia: Couldn't Couldn't have guessed. Andrea: There's the reason that we're doing this and why we vibe so well. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ okay, I need to save that question for the rabbit trail. Jesus. Wow. ⁓ My brain Woo going everywhere. Okay, did you did you have anything else on your list before I steal every possible thought you've had tonight about why you would go to therapy? Andrea: Ooh, put a pin in it. ⁓ No, I love this. This is great. I should just have you come up with the list and I'll just be like, yeah, that's what I thought. every single time. ⁓ I mean, the the next one that kind of comes up in my brain are kind of the obvious ones, like if you have experienced a big trauma, if you have experienced a loss, right? Those kind of things that that happen. Yeah. Yeah. And I think like a lot of people can. Olivia: Mm. Hmm. Like life event type things. Yeah, yeah. Andrea: get through those, you know, like a lot of people have the support in the system that they need to get through big and hard things. ⁓ but not everybody does. And I think it's a regardless too, can be a really great place to find support in in those big areas of need. Olivia: Yeah, I like that. I mean I I it I'm glad you said that because in my mind it almost feels like it's common sense. But I think that's just because of ⁓ obviously being in the field and like the work that we do that it feels like common sense, but it's absolutely worth saying out loud. And ⁓ and I'll I'll like expand on that idea of l life life events, but then also like life transitions. So like becoming a parent or Andrea: Mm-hmm. Right. Yes. Yes. Olivia: moving away or retiring or ⁓ you know mm Andrea: Mm. Getting s getting sick, finding out you have a disability or a chronic illness. Olivia: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Or like different stage of like age or something like being like in midlife or like just like transitions in general. ⁓ absolutely. Yeah. Andrea: Yeah. Or end of life like even end of life, right? There are there are therapists that do end of life therapy and it can be so powerful. Olivia: Yeah, that's yeah, which is super cool. so yeah, not just like life events, but life transitions. Like there's so many, like I know the big life transition for me that I've talked about before, but like becoming a parent, holy Jesus. ⁓ that just like completely rocked my pants off. in so many ways. And even though I wanted it and I still want it and I love it and it's like the absolute best thing Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm. Olivia: ⁓ still been really challenging and I think it's really pushed me to go to therapy and to like explore these things and better understand myself and, you know, all that all that blat stuff that you do in therapy. but I like I there's honestly a part of me that's like, if I hadn't become a parent, I don't know if I would have learned these things about myself. Andrea: Yeah, totally. Mm. Yeah. Olivia: So like having that big life transition, like it I think it really pushed me and like motivated me and that that was my like catalyst in a lot of ways. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, moving for me was a really big one before. Like that was one of the reasons I had done it before. moving again is going to be another one for me. Like those big, big life transitions, because ⁓ a lot of what I like to talk about in therapy, I I'm sure you do this too, is support networks and community. Like I am such a relational therapist in so many ways in that context where it is so important. Olivia: Yeah. Andrea: for everyone to have some level of support. ⁓ and things like life transitions, you don't know what that support's gonna look like in those transitions. And hoping and having a therapist can kind of guarantee you that support. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah. I mean this is similar to what we've been talking about, but maybe said in a little bit of a different way. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Olivia: One one of the cool things about therapy and one of I would say like a reason to go is that that hour is all about you. Andrea: Mm. Yeah. Olivia: And maybe for some people that's like scary, they're like, ⁓ God, no, like I don't wanna be all about me. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Olivia: E you know, and that's that's valid, right? But I think there's a lot of other people it's like, ⁓ thank God. Like I can just like take up the hour however I need to or want to, right? And like that's really freeing to like, ⁓ like this hour is for me. And I can use it how I want and I can s I can be who I want and I can say what I want. Like all of that. It's like that's another reason to go to therapy. Like if you feel like you don't have time for you Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Olivia: That's a great way to get that into your life. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I I kind of said this earlier, right? That was something for me that was so helpful because at the time that I was doing it, it was I didn't have people asking me how I was. And so just to be able to like show up and have somebody be like, How are you today? Sometimes would just like trigger the waterworks, but then other times be like, thank you. Like I needed that. I needed somebody to ask me that question. Olivia: Hmm. Yeah. I remember when I like a teenager and I I went to therapy. I think why I why in part like I chose it for myself. I think it was because I just like wanted feedback I could trust. Andrea: Mm, mm-hmm. Olivia: If that makes any sense? Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. Olivia: of like not just somebody I can talk to, not just like an hour for me, but just like that I could trust the things that that person was saying or like suggesting or whatever the case may be. because you get a lot of information from a lot of places and it's like kind of hard to sift through, especially when you're like a teenager or a kid, you're like, I don't like what is happening? There's so much information all the time. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Olivia: And when you're adult, you're still getting a lot of information but you have like a little bit better of a filter system, I feel like. Kind of. So I would say that would be another reason. Andrea: Totally. Totally. Yeah. And maybe kind of along those lines too, I've heard individuals going to therapy because they want someone in somebody to correct them. So like kind of like feedback and like correct correct them sounds kind of aggressive, but more so like get direct feedback. Really make sure that like because I think a lot of people gaslight themselves, right? Or like Olivia: Mm. Andrea: experience things where like did I make the right decision? Am like what is the right decision for me? And sometimes having that neutral party is a like we know the questions to ask people to get them to what their answer is. Right. We're not gonna say we're not necessarily gonna be like, ⁓ like this is the answer, right? But we can help direct and guide people to that answer. And sometimes like I'll be honest, we can check people, right? We can be like you're the asshole here. Olivia: Hm. ⁓ yeah. Andrea: Like that was kind of a dick move. ⁓ again, once you get good rapport with your client, that is appropriate. Olivia: No, we just say that. Intake. What the hell do you want? I'm just kidding. Yeah. Yeah. and again, this is like probably ⁓ like another way of saying what we've talked about. just to, you know, beat a dead horse. ⁓ in my mind I think one other reason to beat a dead horse Andrea: It'd take what? Why the fuck ya here? I hate that saying. It's one of the worst sayings I feel like ever existed. Olivia: Why? Andrea: I don't know, it just I see it in my head and I hate it. Olivia: Would it be better if I used a different animal? Andrea: No, that's fine. It's just Olivia: I'm never gonna think about that phrase the same way again. Andrea: It's just one of those things. You're welcome. Sorry, I interrupted. Olivia: Anyways that's literally our dynamic is just interruptions, it's fine. Andrea: Which makes me think of another reason, which might seem obvious too, but like if you've been diagnosed with ADHD or autism. I think that I say this because I have also encountered a lot of people that like have gotten a diagnosis from a medical provider. And the med provider like, ⁓ we'll just get you on Adderall. No, no, no, no, no. Also go to therapy. Olivia: Yeah. Andrea: I like yeah, I think it's just valid to call it out, right? Where it's like there are people that just get put on from their med provider, just get put on meds and the med provider doesn't even bring up going to therapy. And I think it's changing and it's shifting so much more now, but I do still hear every once in a while people are like, you know, ⁓ my partner just got diagnosed with ADHD by their med provider and they just got out of all. Are they going to therapy? Probably not. So Olivia: Yeah, I I I have seen that a lot recently with with ⁓ more specifically like the ADHD diagnosis where like people are getting emailed and then medicated for it, which is great, but then they don't go to therapy. And the reason why I think in this specific case therapy is really helpful is there's so much psychoeducation that's not happening from their med provider about what ADHD means and what it looks like and all that that they can get out of therapy. Andrea: Let's get in there. Mm-hmm. Totally. Yeah. There's so many pieces that like therapy can fill in the blanks for you with in so many ways. Olivia: Which is like rough. Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ 'cause w what I was gonna say is like one of the things that I think you can get out of therapy is like connections of like how your current experience connects to something else in your life. and have somebody kinda like draw those lines for you, which I think is cool. so you don't have to be like that meme of the guy with like a cigarette, like with like all the Andrea: Mm. Mm-hmm. Olivia: yarn like stringed in the back and being like conspiracy theorist of your own experience. You can just like go to therapy and they can help you. Andrea: Yeah. Yes. A hundred percent. Yeah. Yeah. Like the the n non-biased, neutral or like supportive person to talk to is so powerful with all of these things and so many different areas of of life and experience and every therapist has a like there's so many unique niches out there too. Like there's even Therapists who specialize in financial anxiety specifically, which is really interesting, right? Like if you're going through bankruptcy or a job shift or if you just bought a house, like a lot of people have financial trauma. And like there are therapists that specialize in that, which is so interesting. Olivia: ⁓ yeah. Yeah, I remember when it was like this last year I heard about the like specialty of sports anxiety. Andrea: Yes. Olivia: And I was like, that niche exists. and it makes sense, but I'm like so unathletic. The idea of like sports anxiety was like people people socialize and ⁓ well, I guess that makes sense, yeah. Cool. But like, whoa. Andrea: Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's so interesting. And the fact that there are people that like focus in on those things r is really cool to me. Like obviously we have somewhat of a niche in neurodivergence, right? But also like I love all the other things. Olivia: Yeah. No, I know. When I when I heard about sports anxiety, I was like, ⁓ that's so cool. Like that would be a really cool thing to learn more about. And then I like, I'd have absolutely no street cred. I've never played a sport. So unless the like week long soccer camp I was in when I was like ten counts, but I don't really think it does. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Ha ha ha. Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ my gosh. There's so much that comes with sports. Yeah. So interesting. Yeah. I mean, then also a as I'm thinking about like niches, it's coming up with like other things that maybe feel obvious, like reasons to go to therapy, or maybe they're tied to like life transition-ye stuff. But like the exploration of kink. You know, there's lots of therapists that can support that. That's a great reason to go to therapy because that can be a really Olivia: S so I was like, Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Mm. Andrea: l li like a a shift in life experience or a shift in intimacy experience. And that's a really great reason to go to therapy. Olivia: Yeah. ⁓ yeah. I mean God, there's so many reasons I don't know why people don't go. Andrea: I know. Olivia: maybe reason to go is that like it's not that scary. Andrea: Mm-hmm. Yeah. ⁓ it really isn't. I mean, I I understand the anxiety and that comes with vulnerability and how that can feel really big, but I can guarantee it, like once you open that door and sit down on that couch, it's not that scary. Olivia: Yeah, I mean you don't even have to lay down. Andrea: Unless No No You don't. You could do therapy standing up if you really wanted to. Olivia: You could be like I I'm I swear to god, I go on some journeys and sessions. Clients be carrying me around doing all the things. And I'm like, cool. I get like a house tour. It's fine. Andrea: ⁓ do I have some stories that I will save for another episode. Olivia: Yeah. My clients are not standing still. Let me tell you. Andrea: Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Pacing is my favorite. Just like this sometimes I'm like, okay, I actually do need you to sit down because ⁓ vertigo. Olivia: I'm getting I'm yeah, I'm getting motion sick. Yeah, thankfully I haven't gotten motion sick from anyone yet, but Ooh Ooh Andrea: Someone the other day dropped dropped their phone and I was like, ⁓ my gosh. I like reacted myself because I was like, that was wild. Olivia: About it where I can see myself like slowly fully. Andrea: Yep. Yep. ⁓ my gosh. So funny. Olivia: I just like I see my inevitable doom of just like I'm gonna fall. It's so funny to me. Andrea: I love it. I love it. Sometimes I'll be like, hey, I'm sliding. Olivia: Okay, I said that once and then I like, That's boring So l like the next time I just was like Timber's hope Andrea: That's good. Olivia: I'm so unprofessional. I can't come on. Andrea: But I hope this is like giving people a like a reason to go to therapy. You know, like it that's such a that's such a funny pivot there. But like we are therapists are normal people. Like, yes, we've talked about weird therapists. There are therapists out there that are a little bit more stiff, but like if you like what we're doing, you're probably gonna be able to be okay in therapy. Cause there's a ton of unserious therapists like us out there. Olivia: Yeah, normalizing it. Yeah, and you don't know if it works f for you or if you like it unless you try. So like ki give it a try. Andrea: Yeah, go eat the peas. See if you like Olivia: That's what I'm saying. Andrea: Hehehe. Olivia: ⁓ and if any of you all out there have any ⁓ things that you want us talk about or topics, hit us up, let us know. We're always kind of like texting back and forth of what we should talk about. so you are all subjected to the topics we choose. So if you don't want to be subjected to that, let us know your thoughts. Andrea: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And we are serious about the Reddit thing. So if you ever see a therapist Reddit story and you want to send it our way, please send it to us in the DMs. ⁓ or text it to us if you personally know us. Slide into the DMs. We like a s I'm gonna stop there. ⁓ Olivia: Mm. Andrea: But give us give us all your thoughts, all your ideas, because we wanna keep doing this and keep giving you some fun and silly content. Olivia: Yeah, 'cause we love it. It's so fun. Andrea: Yeah. Yeah. We love the ba I l really like the balance that we have begun to strike with like the unserious but seriousness. Like we are taking these topics very seriously, but at the same time, like just adding our personality and the unseriousness that we are like fundamentally to that. And I love that. Olivia: Yeah. Yeah, it's very our style for sure. It's on brand. It's absolutely on brand. Andrea: Yeah, yeah. On brand and wait for the branding photos because it's gonna work. Olivia: ⁓ yeah, I dude, I'm I'm so excited. I'm so excited. Everyone else should be excited. Photos that actually look like us. Wild, I know. Andrea: I know. Yay! I'm so excited. Well, thank you everyone for listening. We hope you enjoyed and we hope that this gave you a reason to go to therapy if you haven't. and please let us know if it inspired you. ⁓ but please like, subscribe, comment, share, all the things. We'd love to see your support. And we will see you in the rabbit trail episode. Olivia: See ya. Andrea: Bye.